


Smoke & Lightning: Heavy Metal Thunder

by sinfuldesire_archivist



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-12
Updated: 2010-07-08
Packaged: 2018-09-08 05:44:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 52
Words: 199,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8832724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinfuldesire_archivist/pseuds/sinfuldesire_archivist
Summary: AU. Jared's a classic case of rich kid gone wrong, whose only sense of family comes from his motorbike, the guy he rents a garage from to live in and the precinct cops who know his face better than most already. Jensen's a hard-working student whose family are helping push him towards great things. What happens when their two worlds collide, and will Jared's troublesome nature be too much for Jensen to handle?





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the Sinful Desire archivists: this story was originally archived at [Sinful-Desire.org](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Sinful_Desire). To preserve the archive, we began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2016. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [Sinful Desire collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/sinfuldesire/profile).

It was raining again. Jensen rested his chin against his hand and glanced out of the window. It was dark and thoroughly miserable out there and he knew he'd have to stand and wait for his brother to show up whilst getting soaked to the bone. He'd called him at lunch and been told that Josh had to do something else before he could come pick Jensen up. Like Jensen didn't know that by 'something else' he meant his girlfriend, Cathy. 

 

By the time the final bell rang the clouds outside had made good on their promise and the air smelt of the storm that was now above the town. Jensen waited until the majority of the other students had left and the hallway by his locker was nearly empty before he dared to leave the restroom. He knew if he was there when Doug and his crowd of followers happened by then the day would have a less than pleasant end. Especially considering the moment earlier that day when, in the one class he and Doug shared, the teacher had suggested that the football jock take some tips from Jensen and actually research his homework rather than just bash it out and hope his team status would excuse him. 

 

Jensen had felt sick as soon as he heard that and he hadn't dared to look up from his desk for the rest of the class. When it was over he'd managed to stay behind and talk to the teacher until after the next bell sounded, not caring that he was several minutes late for the next class.

 

Now he stood outside the school gates, shivering in his thin jacket, his hair plastered to his skull and dripping rainwater down the back of his neck.

 

"Come on, Josh. Hurry up..." He muttered to himself, annoyed that his brother could leave him waiting like this when he could see fine and well that it was cold and wet out. 

 

"Hey, if it isn't Ashwood's little lapdog."

 

Jensen thought his heart stopped. He didn't want to look up, but he couldn't help himself. _Shit_ , he thought. _Just walk away_. So he quickly turned away from the school and started walking in the direction of home. He could hear Doug and his friends following and prayed that Josh would show up any moment. 

 

"Where're you running off to, Ackles? Scared because you don't have a teacher backing you up now?"

 

"Leave me alone," Jensen said, quietly enough that he wasn't sure Doug would hear it.

 

"Nah. Not tonight. This is kind of my entertainment for the evening."

 

Jensen bit his tongue against pointing out that surely Doug had better social highlights than this. He picked up his pace a little, aware that Doug was only a few steps behind him now. He expected the next remark, too. The name didn't hurt any less.

 

"Slow down, faggot. We just want to talk."

 

In his coat pocket, Jensen's hand tightened around his cell phone. He needed to call his brother. Or Chris. Anyone to come and get him out of this. But he couldn't bring himself to get the phone out and call, knowing that such an action would only fuel Doug's mockery of him. He looked up briefly. There was a gas station at the end of the block and he hoped he could make it that far. The storm had emptied the streets of people and the traffic along this road now that all the school transports and students were gone was pretty minimal.

 

"Why're you running away, Jenny? You afraid?"

 

Jensen let out a strangled sound as Doug grabbed at the strap of his book bag and pulled it off his back. He had no choice now but to stop and try and get it back. He couldn't leave it behind. He wouldn't be able to explain the loss of all his books and homework to his father that easy. Telling him the truth was certainly not an option either.

 

"Please give it back, Doug?"

 

"Why? Afraid you'll disappoint Mr. Ashwood? Hey, Jensen, maybe if you suck his dick he'll just give you all 'A's anyway."

 

Jensen had nothing to say in return to that. He could only stand there as they laughed at him, hand held out as he waited for the return of his book bag.

 

"Maybe you already do, huh? Maybe that's why he likes you so much."

 

"Is that why you're jealous?" Jensen asked, finally having had enough of this. "You talk about sucking dick so much, makes me think you're curious."

 

"Shut the fuck up, Ackles," Doug growled, his face darkening instantly. 

 

"Give me my books back."

 

Doug shook his head and, before Jensen could stop him, he'd tossed the bag into the road. It flew open when it hit the wet tarmac and books skidded out into the large puddles of water. Jensen stared at the mess, his stomach feeling like it was dropping through him. He tried to speak, but couldn't think. His father was going to kill him. Really. There was no way he could-

 

"Gonna cry, Jenny?"

 

He charged at Doug then, wanting to hurt him, but the jock's buddies got in the way, grabbing him by the arms and holding him back as he cursed Doug out.

 

"You kiss your momma with that mouth?" Doug asked, then sneered. "I guess a fag like you-" He didn't even manage to finish before Jensen struggled free and took a swing for him. The punch caught Doug by surprise, hurting him even though there was really little strength behind it. It also left Jensen off-balance and he wasn't prepared to hold himself up against the attack that followed. He fell to the ground after two hits and curled in on himself, holding his hands over the back of his head as two different booted feet kicked at his legs. 

 

The noise of an engine was almost drowned out by their yelling and by the storm. Jensen lifted his head slightly thinking, _Thank god, Josh_.., and a second later a kick caught his jaw and his head thumped against the concrete.

 

 

 

When he came to, the others were gone. The street was empty and the right side of his face and neck were one warm itch that he groggily identified as clotting blood. It was still raining and his hands slipped as he tried to push himself up. Jensen managed to get to his feet, wobbled unsteadily, then dug into his pocket for his cell phone. The screen was cracked from his fall and the display was gone.

 

"Shit," he muttered, then he remembered the gas station he'd been trying to get to. They'd have a phone. He could call Josh to come and get him from there. His books, he could tell, were a lost cause. As soon as he was home and cleaned up he would call or e-mail his teachers and tell them he had been involved in an accident on his way home. No, he'd been mugged and hadn't seen who'd done it. That would work on his father, too.

 

Satisfied with the plan, Jensen began limping his way down the street.

 

 

 

Pulling the refrigerator door open, Jared paused for a moment and fingered the gun in his pocket. It was unloaded; he wasn't an idiot, but he still felt uncomfortable with it. He hoped this would be easy. Should be, he thought. This wasn't his first time. He wasn't used to this, by any means, and was nervous. Could feel the anxious churning in his gut as he slid the visor of his helmet up and let the cool air chill his face and calm him. Jared pulled out a six-pack and waited until the other clerk behind the desk headed out back for something. Then he started towards the front of the small store.

 

He'd just started pulling the gun free from his pocket when the bell above the door sounded and somebody walked in right in front of him. The newcomer turned and Jared saw him look down, saw the sudden flash in his eyes when he saw the gun handle.

 

"Oh, god.." The man groaned and Jared shook his head desperately, frowning. The guy looked in no shape to take him; one side of his face was bloodied up and there were dark shadows around both his eyes. But Jared didn't want him saying anything to warn the clerk, who was staring at the new arrival in shock.

 

"Hey buddy," the clerk said. "What the hell happened to you?"

 

"I was mugged. Is there a phone? I have to call my brother.."

 

Jared stumbled as the guy pitched sideways and fell against him, the impact knocking the gun from his hand. It clattered across the floor towards where the clerk had come out from behind his counter and the three of them froze, staring at it. Then the clerk yelled, "Call the cops!" to his colleague and darted forward. Jared grabbed the bloody stranger by the arm and raced through the open door, dragging him along.

 

"Don't! Just leave me alone and I won't hurt him any more!"

 

The clerk didn't back off, but he hesitated long enough that Jared managed to clamber onto his bike, pulling the guy on behind him. Thankfully, he felt the guy grip at his waist, and he quickly started the engine and pulled away, heading for home, his heart thundering. He didn't stop swearing the whole way back.

 

Jared rode straight into the open garage and stood the bike up, dragging the other man off it and onto the floor before hurrying over and shutting the garage door behind him. One moment later the door between the house and garage opened and, as expected, Jeffrey stood there.

 

"Jay, what in the name of God is going on?"

 

Jared tugged his helmet off, tossed it onto an armchair nearby. "I'm sorry man, okay, I swear I didn't do anything.."

 

"Oh, god, no." Jeffrey scrubbed his hands over his face, staring at Jared. "Not again. Tell me you didn't-"

 

"No! I got low on cash, I owed someone and-"

 

"You stole my gun? Is that it? When the fuck you gonna learn, boy?"

 

"I didn't take yours, all right?" Jared pointed over to his workbench, where Jeffrey's gun still sat. "I took a spare and it wasn't even loaded and, look, I didn't even do anything. I just dropped the gun by accident, and I didn't do anything. The guy saw it and freaked out, that's all, I swear. They can't do anything to me for that, right? Jeff?"

 

Jeffrey hesitated. "I don't know. No. Probably not. But you're not taking any chances."

 

"They didn't see my face, okay? I had my helmet on. And my gloves, so the gun's clean. They won't know it was me. Fuck." Jared stopped, clenching his hands into fists. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to mess up again."

 

"Damn straight you don't. We'll sort out this owing money shit later." He stopped at a groan that came from the floor behind Jared's bike. "What..who the hell is that?" He stepped further into the garage, to get a better look at their guest. Jared reached down and helped him up, moving his helmet so the guy could sit down. 

 

"I don't know. He showed up just before. Interrupted me."

 

"Sounds like he saved you, then. Hey kid. Got a name?"

 

The guy tried to straighten up, holding his face, and nodded slowly.

 

"You want to share it with the rest of the class?"

 

"Jensen," came the feeble reply. 

 

"He says he got mugged," Jared offered.

 

"Josh should be picking me up now," Jensen said, his voice no stronger.

 

"Yeah, well, I doubt Josh is headed here somehow. What's his number? We'll call him and tell him not to worry."

 

Jensen's eyes widened. "What? But..I have to go home. My Dad will-"

 

"You're going nowhere in that state," Jeffrey interrupted. "Let us patch you up first and then I'll give you a ride home. Jay, bring him in the house."

 

"Yessir."

 

Jensen was doubtful about going anywhere with them, but he hurt just about everywhere and Jay's arm around him was strong and comforting. He let himself be led into the house where he was sat down at the kitchen table. Jeffrey got a first aid kit down from on top of his microwave and sat facing him, opening it up. He poured some iodine out onto cotton balls and Jensen flinched back as he started mopping at the blood on his face.

 

"You know, cuts to the face always look worse than they are," Jeffrey muttered. "Hold still." A firm hand came down on Jensen's shoulder, holding him steady while Jeffrey continued to clean him up. "Doesn't look much like a mugging to me." He looked Jensen in the eyes. "Looks more like a beating."

 

Jensen kept his mouth shut, looking away. 

 

"Well, of course you don't have to tell us. But maybe if you did then we could help."

 

"Thanks."

 

"No problem. You want to get dried off? Maybe I can-"

 

"I just want to go home," Jensen cut in.

 

"You know, you're kind of rude," Jared told him, letting go of his shoulder and pacing around the table.

 

Jeffrey shook his head. "Shut up. It's all right, the boy's just in shock. Hardly surprising. Anyway, that looks a lot better. How about you come on out to the car and I'll drive you home?"

 

Jensen gave him a grateful half-smile and got up to follow him out, leaving Jared stood in the kitchen, pissed off.


	2. Chapter one

It was well after dinner by the time the car pulled up to the house. Jeffrey's growling muscle car slid into the driveway; he eased to a stop and cut the engine.

 

"This your place, kiddo?" He asked only because the directions given had been rather half-hearted, not because he believed Jensen would steer him wrong on purpose.

 

Sitting in the front seat, Jensen remained leant back against the leather. "My parents'," he answered. "My dad's a lawyer."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Yeah," he smiled. "The Great Alan Ackles. Never loses a case."

 

Though Jeffrey heard a clear sarcastic tone in the boy's voice, he didn't push the subject. He nodded his head and chuckled. "Not bad." He looked over at Jen, seeing the young man was still clearly feeling bad. "Alright, you," he said. "Let's get you inside, huh?"

 

Jensen really wanted to agree with him, but every bit of strength he'd had in his bones had left him on the drive across town. All he could manage was a weak nod.

 

Jeffrey got out of the driver's seat, closing the door behind himself, and headed round to the passenger's side. He opened the door and reached in to help the younger man out. Back at the house, he'd warned Jensen that he might have a cracked rib or two, but Jensen had refused to go to the doctors.

 

Jensen let Jeffrey help him out of the car. All of his muscles seemed to have seized up, and he felt pretty sore. Someone must have kicked his hip too, because a sharp pain stabbed through it when he walked, causing him to limp. He hadn't realized the damage was so severe, assuming he had been working through adrenaline and shock.

 

Jensen saw his mother standing in the doorway and smiled at her. "Hi, Mom."

 

"Oh, my God, Jensen?"

 

He chuckled and nodded. "I'm okay, Mom."

 

The storm clouds were still heavy in the sky, the rain still coming down in a dreary, annoying drizzle. Jensen's mother didn't care, and stepped outside in her beach-like white pant-suit and bare feet, to help Jeffrey bring her son inside. "What happened?"

 

"Nothing," he answered. "I just want to lay down and sleep for oh, eight, ten years?"

 

Inside the house, Jeffrey didn't have time to admire the grandeur of it all. He followed where Jensen's Mom led, up the wide, curved staircase and into Jensen's room. For a split second, Jeffrey decided that, with only a slight exaggeration, the hallway in the house was wider than his garage. Jensen's room was big and airy, white walls and white bedding. No posters that Jeffrey would have thought typical of a boy his age. A single piece of modern art was on the wall above the fireplace, and a handful of personal items were laid out upon the dresser top.

 

Jensen grunted as he laid down on the bed. Jeffrey immediately moved to take the young man's shoes off, but Mom stopped him. "Oh, I can do that, thank you."

 

"Mom, this is Mister Morgan," Jensen said, his eyes closed. Blindly, he gestured to his mother. "Mister Morgan, this is my Mom."

 

Jeffrey held out his hand to the woman. "Jeffrey," he told her.

 

"Donna," she smiled. He smiled in return, genuinely pleased to meet her. She turned back to her son, brushing a hand over his forehead. "Jensen, sweetheart," she said softly. "Tell me what happened."

 

He took hold of her hand, opening his eyes only long enough to glance up at her. "Mom, really," he said. "I just want to sleep for a little while."

 

Frowning, she gave in. "Alright."

 

Being extra careful, she and Jeffrey left, their footfalls silent on the plush carpet. Jeffrey turned just outside the young man's doorway and watched Donna close the door quietly. "He ended up at my house," he told her. "My boy found him at the gas station pretty beaten up."

 

Concerned, Donna stood closer to him to whisper. "Did he say what happened?"

 

Jeffrey shook his head. "All he said was that he was mugged."

 

"Mugged?!"

 

"That's what he claims," he shrugged. "I'm not inclined to believe that, though. I've seen muggings before. That looks more like a beating."

 

Donna sighed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Oh, his father won't be pleased."

 

It was Jeffrey's turn to frown. "Go easy on the boy," he advised. "He's had a rough day already."

 

She looked surprised at his manner, but agreed that he was right. "Alan and I are very thankful to you."

 

"My pleasure, Mrs Ackles. I'll show myself out. It was good to meet you, ma'am."

 

 

 

 

Breakfast was out on the table for him by the time he got up. The sunlight slanted through the kitchen windows at an angle that told Jensen he'd easily slept through his morning classes. Still moving gingerly, but better than before, Jensen shuffled to the breakfast nook and helped himself to the cold blueberry pancakes. Mom always made blueberry pancakes for him when he wasn't feeling well.

 

As he ate, he had mixed emotions about missing school. Part of him wanted to show up, late or not, just to prove to Doug that he hadn't gotten the better of him. Another part of him was thankful for the reprieve. And yet another part was dreading the earful he'd get from Dad. He didn't know what Mom had said to the man to get him to let Jensen skip classes that day, but he had a feeling he would be owing his Dad more than just an explanation.

 

Donna arrived home while Jensen was still thinking over his pancakes and orange juice. She entered the house through the side door and smiled brightly at him when she saw him at the table. "Hi, sweetie," she greeted.

 

"Hey, Mom."

 

In her arms was a glorious bouquet of flowers of all shapes, sizes, and colors. "Aren't these gorgeous?" she asked, setting them down upon the kitchen counter.

 

"Yeah, really great," he answered. "Who're they for?"

 

"I was thinking you could bring them to your friend."

 

Jensen shrugged his shoulders and shook his head. "What friend?"

 

"Mister Morgan," she said. "Jeffrey, I think he said his name was?"

 

After seeing their house, Jensen was pretty sure the flowers would be out of place. "What are they going to do with flowers, Mom?"

 

"That's not the point, Jensen," she said. "It's the idea of it. You're thanking him for bringing you back home."

 

"I _thanked_ him, Mom."

 

She set her hands upon her hips and sighed at him. "Jensen Ross," she reprimanded. "You're going to bring these flowers to them and thank them for what they did. Invite them to dinner, we'd love to have them."

 

Sliding out of the breakfast nook, Jensen laughed. "Dad said that?"

 

"Of course he didn't," she returned, gathering up the fresh-cut flowers. "He doesn't make all the decisions here."

 

Jensen just looked at her, clearly disbelieving her story.

 

Donna pushed the flowers towards her son, the plastic crinkling loudly. "Take them, Jensen," she told him. "It's the least we can do."

 

 

 

 

 

"Ow, Jesus _fuck_."

 

Jensen arched his eyebrows at the curse. In his parents' house, he and his siblings weren't allowed to utter a single swear. And Dad had made a list for them to refer to, too.

 

Stepping closer, Jensen peeked inside the garage and saw someone there. He thought it must be the guy from the gas station. Jared, was it? He was shirtless and bent down in front of a very sporty motorcycle. _Suicycle_ was scribed on the side, making Jensen's eyes flare out of fear for just a second. His attention returned to Jared, and he suddenly realized that all of the colors, lines and shading on the man's muscled shoulders formed into one big, continuous tattoo. The ink trailed down his right arm, most of the shapes undefinable upon a quick glance. A hint of another tattoo could be seen creeping out from underneath the waistband of his boxers, shown quite blatantly since his jeans were a bit too big and gaping at the waist.

 

Interrupting Jensen's staring game, there was the sound of metal upon metal and then a tool falling to the cement floor of the garage.

 

"Ow, God-fucking-dammit!"

 

Swallowing nervously, Jensen cleared his throat.

 

Jared turned his head to see who was there eavesdropping. It took him just a moment to recognize Jensen, and he stood to face him. "What's with the preppy look?"

 

Confused, Jensen shook his head. "What?"

 

"You look like you should be named Hoight Devonshire the Eighth, on a boat with your Irish Setter and smoking a pipe."

 

Jensen chuckled. The plastic that the flowers were wrapped in crinkled in his hands. "No," he said. "Jensen will do."

 

"Alright," Jared agreed. He picked up a rag and tried, unsuccessfully, to wipe the grease off his hands. As he did, he stepped closer. "What can I do for you?"

 

Jensen noticed two silver rings pierced through Jared's nipples. He averted his eyes and handed the man the flowers in his arms. "These are for you," he said. "Well, not for you. Well, they are. For you and your Dad, I mean. As a thanks. For yesterday."

 

Jared eyed the flowers and nodded. "Great," he said, devoid of any real emotion other than sarcasm. "Those'll look smashing on the mantle."

 

Jensen was sure that he'd just been made fun of, but didn't know what to say. He inched the flowers closer to Jared, hoping the man would just take them so that he could leave.

 

"Just put them inside," Jared told him, turning back to his bike.

 

He faltered for a moment. "You want me to put them inside?"

 

Jared grunted as he used the wrench on the bike, trying to get something loosened or tightened, Jensen couldn't tell which. "You've seen the place already, haven't you?"

 

"Yeah," he shrugged.

 

"Then you know there's jack-shit to steal."

 

Jensen's brow furrowed for just a second as he stared down at Jared's tattooed back. "Oh..." he mumbled softly, "...kay."

 

The garage was filled to the brim with, well, everything. There were boxes and bags, hoses and rope. Screwdrivers hung on the wall, as well as a roll of paper towels that looked to be rather ancient. A column of drawers stood beside one of the work benches; some were open and some looked painted shut. Besides Jared's blue Suicycle, there was an older bike there. Jensen could barely make out the word "Ducati" on the side. Jensen didn't know anything about bikes, but that one looked like it had been quite the beauty in past times.

 

After weaving through the assorted junk in the garage, Jensen let himself into the house through the side door. "Hello?" he called. No one answered. It was still mid-day though, and he figured that Mister Morgan was probably at work. There wasn't any sign of a female presence in the house. This was clearly a bachelor pad, so Jensen figured he wouldn't find a vase. Still, he searched under the sink, and in the cupboards above the refrigerator. While he was there, standing on a kitchen chair he had slid across the floor to the refrigerator, Jensen came across a few dusty photos that had been left atop the fridge. He picked them up and blew the dust off of them with one heaving breath.

 

In one of the photos was a very young Jared, no nipple rings or tattoos in sight. He was smiling brightly, his hair shaved short in the back rather than shaggy like it was now. His eyes sparkled brightly as he smiled, Jeffrey standing next to him. Jeffrey had no beard in the picture, but it was unmistakably him. Gazing down at the shot, Jensen smiled.

 

"Voyeurism run in your family?"

 

Startled, Jensen nearly fell off the chair as he turned to see Jared standing in the doorway to the garage. "Holy crap," he breathed. "I didn't hear you come in."

 

"Clearly."

 

Jensen cleared his throat and held the photo out. "I'm sorry, I was looking for a vase and found that."

 

Boots thumping on the cheap tile floor, Jared neared him. He took the picture from him and looked down at it. A smile flashed across his face as he remembered the day it was taken.

 

Jensen noticed a dreamy look in Jared's eyes and smiled. "Your Mom take that?"

 

Jared's demeanor quickly deteriorated. "My Mom's dead," he answered quickly. "Just put those in the sink. Jeff'll take care of them when he gets home."

 

Instantly, Jensen jumped down from the chair. He spoke over his shoulder as he did, trying to make their conversation last. Something about Jared's smile in the photo made him curious. He didn't remember ever smiling like that. "I'm sorry, you don't call him Dad?"

 

Jared stopped just before the doorway to the garage. "Why would I do that?" he asked, looking back at Jensen.

 

Jensen put the flowers in the sink and then brushed his hands off. "Be..cause...he's your Dad?"

 

"Did I say he was my Dad?"

 

"I'm sorry," Jensen said again. "I just assumed."

 

Clearing his throat, Jared turned back around to face Jensen and took a few steps closer. "Jensen, is it?" He smiled sarcastically when he saw the preppy boy nod his head. Leaning in closer, he spoke softly. "Stop apologizing."

 

"Oh," Jensen said. He stared up at Jared, suddenly noticing how long the man's lashes were. "Okay."

 

In the garage once again, Jensen made sure to close the door behind him. He weaved through the junk once more, pausing beside Jared. He watched him work for several minutes, his hands jammed into his pockets, calming down enough to speak again. "So, what kind of bike is this?"

 

Chuckling, Jared turned and looked up at him from his place on the garage floor. "You know about bikes?"

 

"Sure," Jensen scoffed, shrugging his shoulders.

 

Still smiling, Jared motioned to the old bike that was mostly in pieces. "That one's a Ducati, this one's a Kawasaki."

 

"Yeah, alright," he nodded. "Rock on."

 

Laughing again, Jared shook his head. "Jesus Christ, you know _nothing_ , do you?"

 

Jensen didn't join in on the laughter. He hung his head and sighed. "Not really."

 

It was silent for a moment as Jared thought to himself. "What are you doing for the rest of the day?"

 

"Nothing. I'm skipping school today, I guess."

 

"Alright. Grab some cardboard to sit on. Fuck history. You're going to learn bikes today."


	3. Chapter two

Jensen returned to school the following day, still sore, but determined to catch up with his schoolwork. His father had started in on him, as predicted, but Jensen's mom had somehow calmed him down. Jensen promised that he would work extra hard to make up for the loss of his books and adamantly refused to identify the men that had mugged him. He told them that he'd been at the library all day, too, thinking that admitting to being over at Jared's place for all that time was maybe not a great idea. Jared's lesson had been fascinating and he had only just remembered to extend his mom's invitation to dinner when Jeffrey had returned home from work. However, what he had learned about the bikes Jared was working on now had to be replaced by names and figures and theories. He met with Chris at lunch, gave his friend the bullshit story about being mugged and hoped he'd leave it at that. Chris didn't.

 

He simply waited until Jensen had finished and then said, "Doug, right?"

 

Jensen couldn't even find it in himself to argue. He just nodded, defeated. "How did you know?"

 

"'Cause I know a mugging don't leave you looking like you look right now. That and my girl heard Doug talking about it on the football field. He's a real son of a bitch, and the next time I see him-"

 

"You'll do nothing," Jensen interrupted. "There's no point in sinking to his level. But thanks for offering anyway."

 

"Don't mention it. But you can't just keep ignoring it and pretend it ain't happening. If he keeps getting away with this shit, he's gonna keep doing it."

 

"Thanks, Chris. I got it." Jensen turned all his attention to his lunch then, hearing Chris sigh and start on his own. "I think this whole episode persuaded my mom that I need my own car. That I can't keep relying on Josh all the time. My dad gave him hell when he found out that I'd been waiting for him."

 

"I was wondering why he looked so pissed off this morning."

 

"Who, Josh?"

 

"No, your dad. 'Cause it means he has to break Ackles tradition and buy you a car before you hit twenty-one."

 

Jensen tilted his head, conceding that Chris had a good point. Alan Ackles was not a fan of parting with his dubiously-earned money, unless it had something to do with his sons' future careers. Jensen's mother didn't mind spending it quite so much, but he knew she'd have to convince his father. "I doubt he will. Mom might argue with him, but he'll stick to his guns. He doesn't want me to have any freedom that might jeopardise my studying."

 

"Oh, yeah, that's right." Chris grimaced. "What the hell are you going to do come graduation? Is he going to _allow_ you to celebrate?"

 

Jensen laughed. "Of course, but it'll be a strictly formal affair. Black ties and plenty of his golf buddies telling me all about their day's surgeries. And dad'll remind me about how I can't screw around over the summer since he's paying for me to go to med school and all."

 

"Cool, am I invited?" 

 

"I'm counting on you to save me, man!"

 

"No problem, Jen. No problem. So, what're you doing tonight? After, y'know...Studying. Steve said something about a few beers at his place, maybe get the guitars out?"

 

"I can't tonight, sorry. My mom made me invite a couple of guys over for dinner."

 

Chris's eyes went wide at that statement. "You told her about-"

 

"No! _Jesus_! She doesn't need that on top of everything else to worry about. Besides, she'd tell my dad and he'd murder me. Or castrate me. I don't know what's worse. It's these two guys that helped me out the other night, after Doug..." He waved vaguely at his face. "Anyway, she said I had to thank them properly and her and dad want to thank them in person, so I had to invite them round." Jensen pulled a face at his sandwich. "She made me take them flowers."

 

"Oh, cause..you know, that's not gay at all."

 

"Not really. But they're not really flowers and dinner kind of guys. I think he just said yes out of politeness."

 

"Or maybe he fancies your mom."

 

Jensen groaned. "Don't, please. Don't make this worse. The other guy, the one that found me? He's really hot. I have to sit at dinner with him and pretend like everything's normal. Chris, he's got these tattoos and these nipple rings-"

 

"Wait, when did you see his nipple rings?"

 

"Yesterday, when I took those stupid flowers. He's working on his bike and he's got his shirt off and he turns to me, and the next thing you know I'm staring at his damned chest and he's just standing there and letting me. I almost expected him to say something, but he pretty much ignored me. Until he got to decide that he was going to teach me everything he knows about bikes. The point is, I don't think I'll be able to stand it. Not sitting there and pretending I don't just want to jump him. Which I kind of better not do, because he's got to be straight and he'd probably kick my ass even if he wasn't."

 

"Do you want me to come over and rescue you?"

 

"Tempting as that idea is, I'd really better say no. My mom wouldn't like it."

 

Chris shrugged. "Sure. Call me after, yeah?"

 

 

 

 

Jeffrey straightened his tie, glancing in the mirror to where Jared was sprawled on his couch, flicking a coin between his fingers. "Are you going to get ready or do I have to drag your sorry ass up to that bathroom and wash you myself? You ain't too old, Jay."

 

"Why are you even going to this rich kid's stupid-ass dinner party?" Jared asked, not moving his attention from the coin. Jeffrey strode over and grabbed it out of his hand, ignoring his protests.

 

"It's not a dinner party. It's just _dinner_. And we are both going."

 

"Like hell I am," Jared huffed, shoving his hands in his pockets.

 

"Like hell you're _not_. We were both invited."

 

"Doesn't mean we both have to go."

 

"You know, you're right. You don't have to go. Matter of fact, they'd probably be pretty relieved to know that you're not going."

 

Now he looked indignant. "Why?"

 

"Well, Jay, I mean...Look at you."

 

"What's wrong with me?"

 

Jeffrey shook his head, indicating Jared's torn jeans and oil-stained teeshirt. "You're a mess. It's probably better that you just stay here. Maybe I can bring you back a piece of pie or something."

 

Jared considered this. "What kinda pie they got?"

 

"Hell, I don't know. It's the Ackles family. Probably every damn kind. Don't you want to see how Jensen's doing, anyway? Maybe he has a cute brother."

 

"Oh, yeah, the mythical Josh who never came to pick him up. I don't need to find my sex-life out of that family, thanks. I remember Ackles's involvement the last time I went to jail."

 

Jeff frowned, gritting his teeth for a second. "Juvie, not jail. It's different. And you ain't going back there if I can help it. Just go and find a shirt and some decent pants...You do own some, I bought you the damned things, so I should know. Go get dressed. We're leaving in a half hour."

 

"But, the bike-"

 

"Jay."

 

"I'm not done with-"

 

"Shut up. Go get ready."

 

Jared sighed heavily and got to his feet. "Fine. Whatever. Just remember I'm doing this for you."

 

Jeffrey clouted the back of his head as he went past, telling him it wasn't a favour and he'd better hurry up.

 

When Jared returned from the bathroom Jeffrey breathed a sigh of relief. Yes, the shirt could be a little less tight and a little more respectable, but at least it had buttons and it was clean and ironed. And the pants weren't denim, which was an improvement. He knew he wouldn't get him to wear a tie, but at least the boy looked semi-decent. Good enough to eat with the Ackles family, anyway. He just hoped Alan wouldn't recognise the kid and say something. Unlikely, he knew. Jared had been fourteen the last time their paths had crossed, and he had grown up a hell of a lot since then.

 

Jared followed him outside, then quickly ran back into the garage to grab his leather jacket. Jeffrey shook his head, but Jared threw the jacket on anyway. He gave in, growling at the boy to get in the damn car.

 

 

 

The only thing Jeffrey said to Jared before he rang the doorbell of the Ackles house was to be polite and mind his manners. He promised he would, to Jeffrey's relief, and then the door was pulled open and a petite girl stood there, not much older than twelve by the look of her.

 

"Uh..Sorry, do we have the right.."

 

The girl ignored him, turning to yell back into the house. "Mom! Jen's friends are here!" Then she looked back at them, eyes lingering on Jared, before stepping aside and asking them in as her mother appeared in the hallway.

 

Donna shook Jeffrey's hand and tried to shake Jared's, but he took her hand in his and brought it to his mouth and kissed her knuckles gently. "A real pleasure to meet you, ma'am."

 

Her cheeks flushed slightly and she drew her hand away, slowly. "You must be Jared. Jensen's very thankful to you for helping him out."

 

Jared nodded and thanked her, wondering why Jensen would neglect to tell his mother the whole story. Jared pretty much kidnapped her son to get himself out of trouble and apparently that made him some kind of hero. "It was no trouble, Mrs. Ackles. And it was real nice of you to invite us both over."

 

"It's the least we could do. My husband wanted to meet the men who helped Jen." Her face clouded, just a little. "He's not exactly the most trusting of men, but that's more to do with his job than anything else. Anyway, enough standing around in the hallway. Come on through, we're about ready to eat."

 

In the dining room, Jared waited patiently while Mrs Ackles went round the table introducing them to Jensen's father, his brother and his little sister - the girl who'd opened the door. When she went to sit down, Jared held her chair for her and then took his own with a quick grin toward Jeffrey. Jensen simply sat there and looked mostly like he wanted to be anywhere but at the dinner table. Mackenzie kept looking furtively at Jared while eating her dinner, Joshua asked questions about Jared's job which he answered most graciously without ever revealing that he wasn't technically employed and Alan said very little while his wife talked to Jeffrey about Jensen's school work and their hope that he would become a surgeon.

 

All the while, Jared kept true to his word. He was polite. Overly polite. Jeffrey realised halfway through the main course that Jared was doing it on purpose, because he sounded more fake with every sentence he said. Nobody else seemed to notice, or perhaps they just thought this was exactly what Jared was like.

 

Finally the course was over and Donna and Alan both picked up dishes and headed out of the dining room, at which point Jeffrey kicked Jared under the table.

 

"What the hell was that for?"

 

"You know what you're doing. Cut it out. I will gut you if you don't."

 

"Jeff, we have _company_." Jared nodded towards Jensen and his siblings, but Jeffrey just lowered his voice and leaned in closer.

 

"I'm serious, Jared. I know what you're doing and you damn well better stop it now."

 

"You told me to be polite. I'm being polite."

 

"Yes, exactly. I said polite. Not patronising."

 

Jared narrowed his eyes. "Fine."

 

" _Fine_." Then Jeffrey turned to the other three and apologised, though he wasn't sure anyone but Jensen noticed, since his brother and sister were both trying not to crack up too loudly at the exchange. Jensen, however, was just staring at them and looking vaguely worried. He practically jumped in his seat when his mother came back in, carrying a large dish piled with cheeses and crackers.

 

"Here we go! Help yourselves, everyone!"

 

Jared watched Donna get the dish situated on the table and then slowly turned to Jeffrey. "You said there'd be pie."

 

Mackenzie gulped loudly, swallowing down a laugh at Jared's emphasis, and quickly took a drink of water so she could calm down. Jeffrey felt like putting his head in his hands and willing himself elsewhere. Instead he just kicked Jared again, out of sight, and said, "I'll get you some pie on the way home."

 

He was glad when dinner was over. Gladder still that Alan had retreated to his study. Mackenzie went to her room to study and Jensen and his brother - mostly his brother - insisted that Jared come check out their game system. He followed them, happy to leave Jeffrey alone with Donna. 

 

Jeffrey was not so happy about that. It wasn't that he didn't like Donna, it was just that women made him a little nervous. Married women more so. He could never be sure what they were thinking and it had been, well, a very long time since he had tried to talk to a woman on his own without some kind of dutch courage. He found it difficult to know what to say. Donna, however, started the conversation without any preamble. She poured him a coffee and said,

 

"So, your son is kind of... Is it hard work looking after him?"

 

"I'm sorry?"

 

"I just admire families that don't let things like...like that get in the way. He's a lovely boy. Lovely manners. You've raised him well."

 

Jeffrey's eyes widened in understanding. He had to try not to laugh. She'd mistakenly interpreted his open politeness as him being a little slow. He had no idea why one thing would equate to the other, but he didn't correct her. Instead he just thanked her and gently told her that Jared wasn't his son.

 

"He's not? So you foster him then? I have a friend who fosters difficult children. She said it can be pretty challenging, especially when they have some kind of learning difficulty and, oh, that isn't what Jared has, is it?"

 

"No, he's pretty sharp. Just a bit too literal now and again. But I don't foster him. His mother and I started seeing each other as she was coming out of the relationship with his father. When she left her husband and got custody of Jared, she allowed me into his life as well. She divorced, though we never married ourselves. Her wishes were clear though, she made sure of that."

 

"What happened to her?" Donna asked, although it was clear from her face that she already expected the answer.

 

"She died. Not really unexpected, but it still kind of threw us for a loop. She'd made sure that Jared would be able to stay with me and I've been taking care of him ever since." Jeffrey decided that leaving out the whole part about Jared being taken away from him and put in other foster homes until he ended up in a Juvenile Detention Center was probably for the best. He didn't really want her mentioning it to her husband and having him make the connection, because he obviously hadn't recognised either of them over dinner. Jeffrey supposed he shouldn't be surprised. The man probably dealt with hundreds of cases just like Jared's every year. He couldn't be expected to remember every face he ever set eyes on. He was grateful for that, too.

 

"I'm very sorry. She must have been a wonderful lady to have a son like Jared."

 

Jeffrey chuckled, breaking the somber mood. "Oh, you don't know the half of it, ma'am."

 

Donna smiled, then looked in the direction of the den where the boys were playing a video game rather noisily. "Seems like they're having fun. I hope Jensen stays friends with Jared. He doesn't really have many, and the ones he does have are, well, _musicians_. Not a great influence on a boy studying to become a doctor."

 

Jeffrey had to bite his tongue and just nod in agreement. "No, I guess not. Anyway, dinner was great and I'd like to thank you for having us over-"

 

"Oh, no! This evening was all about thanking _you_ , Jeffrey. There aren't many good samaritans left out there any more and for you to clean him up and drive him halfway across town? That's a real act of kindness."

 

"Well, you're welcome in that case. But we really should get going. I have an early start tomorrow and all. Thanks again."


	4. Chapter three

  
Author's notes: Bloody and Evil thank you for all the wonderful comments!  
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* * *

The high school lunches hadn't improved in the past years he’d been attending. Finding it hard to swallow down the burger, Jensen grimaced just slightly. He couldn't believe that his parents paid such an outrageous tuition, and this was what they got fed for lunch.

 

"Wow, I can see that the burgers are top-of-the-line."

 

Jensen looked up to find Chris nearing him. "Yeah," he agreed, swallowing down the last of what was in his mouth. "Simply stellar." He pushed his tray away, the burger only half finished. He concentrated on his drink and apple instead. "How'd you do on the essay?"

 

"English is for chumps," Chris smiled, sitting down and picking up his own burger. "How'd you do?"

 

Jensen shrugged. "I don't know," he sighed. He crunched into his apple, thoughts jumbled in his mind.

 

Chris eyed him for a moment, concern in his expression. The bruises that Doug had left Jensen with were already starting to fade, the cut lip almost healed, but he still looked like he hadn't slept in days. "You've been really distracted today," he noted. "Everything okay?"

 

Jensen continued to stare off into space, slowly chewing a mouthful of apple.

 

"Jen," Chris said, speaking loudly enough to interrupt his friend's thoughts.

 

Returned to the present, Jensen blinked over at Chris. "What?"

 

"Distracted?" he repeated. "You? What's going on?"

 

"What? No, nothing." He saw Chris' eyelashes flutter, his head tilted to the side. He didn't believe a word Jensen was saying. Frowning, Jensen looked down at his apple, picking at the stem. "I don't know," he said. "I guess I'm just being stupid and emo."

 

Chris took a bite of his burger as he laughed. "Come on," he encouraged. "Out with it."

 

Taking a deep breath, Jensen sighed and shook his head. "I had a great time."

 

"Oh, yeah," Chris said around a mouthful of lunch. "How'd the dinner go?"

 

"Dinner was weird," he admitted. "But afterwards."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"We went in and played games, just like Kenzie and I usually do," he said. "Jared sat next to me. I kept losing because I kept thinking about that. He was sitting next to me." He saw Chris laugh, but it wasn't a mocking laughter. He knew he could tell Chris anything, and it wouldn't matter. "Those tattoos. They were..."

 

Jensen had a hard time with talking like he wanted to at times, his shyness getting the better of him. Chris smiled and nodded, deciding to not press the subject. "I getchya, big man," he said. "It's hard to be smooth when the object of your affections is that close to you."

 

After staring at him for a second, Jensen crumpled. He bent down until his head bounced against the lunch table. "Ow," he said, his voice void of all emotion.

 

Chris reached out, chuckling softly, and patted the back of Jensen's head. "Come on," he said. "It's not that bad. So you like a guy. Big deal. You knew it would happen eventually."

 

Jensen shook his head as best as he could, pressed up against the table. "You don't get it, Chris," he said. "This guy. He's bad news. I know he is, but I can't stop thinking about him."

 

"So you've got a thing for a bad boy," he shrugged. "You think a bad girl doesn't get me going? Come on, go talk to him. Today, after school. The buses on this side of town do run across the tracks, you know."

 

Finally, Jensen picked his head up off the table. His skin was red where it had been pressed against the wood. "No, I really just want to forget about him, to be honest," he said, sadness lacing his voice.

 

"Well, the guys and I are going to play tonight," Chris said. "Why don't you come over? You can do back-ups again."

 

"I don't know."

 

"Come on, you loser," he smiled. "It's Friday. You're not a party-guy, so you've gotta have fun somewhere."

 

It was true; Jensen didn't do well at big parties. He felt out of place and uncomfortable, a fish out of water. Frowning, he finally nodded his head at his best friend. "Yeah," he agreed. "Okay."

 

"Ugh," Chris said suddenly, pushing the lunch tray away. "You're right, these things are shitty. Let's run across the street and load up on sugar and junk food. Hathaway's health class is next for us, and that'll piss her right off."

 

There was a line of Mom-and-Pop markets on the other side of the street that most of the students frequented at lunch time, since they were allowed to leave the campus for that period only. The idea made Jensen smile brighter. He dropped his apple onto his tray and stood to go.

 

 

 

 

The singing did help. In no time, Jensen had almost forgotten about the heavy feeling in his heart. Chris was crazy when he was performing and, after a while, Jensen's sides hurt from laughing so much. It was around nine at night when Chris' parents decided that they'd had enough of the band jamming down in the basement. They all hung around and talked for about an hour or so, and by 10:30, Jensen was in a cab. Chris had offered to take him home, but Jensen had told him that it was fine; he wouldn't mind being alone for a little while.

 

He regretted his decision when the silence brought with it the memories of Jared and the dinner a couple nights before. Tattoos pressed against Jensen's skin, just a bare hint of the body piercing visible through the tight polo shirt stretched across Jared's chest.

 

Sighing, Jensen brushed his hand across his own chest and sat up straighter. Before he knew it, he was asking the driver to head to the other side of the town. He gave him the street name that Jared and Jeffrey lived on, but didn't tell him a house number.

 

"You sure, kid?"

 

Jensen leaned back in the seat again and looked out the window. "No," he answered truthfully. "But just drop me off at the corner, okay?"

 

"You ain't got far to walk, do ya?" the cabbie asked. "That's not the greatest part of town, you know."

 

"I know," Jensen nodded, looking over at the man. "I'll be alright."

 

The driver shrugged. "Your buck, kid," he said.

 

Jensen's mind kept repeating one question over and over. What are you doing, you idiot? He refused to acknowledge the little voice in the back of his head, and the question went unanswered. He stared out the window in silence until the cabbie pulled over to the curb. Jensen got his wallet out, paid what was owed, and then got out of the car. He closed the door, watching the cabbie drive off. He was torn between calling out to the man again, and holding his head high as he walked down the street.

 

Somewhere in the not-too-distant night, a dog snarled and barked. Jensen jammed his hands into his pockets and turned on his heel. He started down the sidewalk, his head low.

 

Everything looked different at night, but he found Jeffrey and Jared's house almost immediately. The garage door was closed this time, and only a few lights were on in the house, but everything else seemed quiet and inviting. Biting at his bottom lip, Jensen started up the drive. He made it to the garage, remembering seeing Jared for the first time. Swallowing, he stopped what he was doing and stared at the closed garage door. He knew the mess that was behind the manual door. Yet it wasn't something that had turned him off, as he thought it would have.

 

Closing his eyes, Jensen shook his head. "You're such a retard," he said aloud to himself. Opening his eyes, he turned again, his shoes scuffing on the crumbling cement drive. He headed back down towards the sidewalk, deciding to dig out his cell phone and call the cabbie back.

 

The phone pressed to his ear, Jensen started when he heard the garage door being pulled open. He turned and saw Jared there, one arm holding the door up. His heart jumped in his chest, so hard that Jensen was sure it was trying to escape out of his throat.

 

In jeans and a sleeveless T-shirt, Jared stared out at Jensen. "I hope you weren't trying to be stealthy and shit," he said. "I heard you coming a mile away."

 

Jensen suddenly realized that someone had answered the phone call he'd placed. He took the phone away from his ear and snapped it closed. "I'm sorry," he apologized.

 

Jared leaned both hands on the door, shifting his weight on his feet. "What'd I say about that apologizing crap?"

 

Jensen chuckled softly and glanced down at his feet for a second. "Yeah, sorry," he said.

 

"What are you doing out here this late?"

 

Jensen tried to pretend that the way Jared was standing wasn't sending a static through him that could lead to dangerous results. The sleeveless tee showed off the array of tattoos trailing along Jared’s muscled arm and well-worked shoulders. Clearing his throat, he glanced back down at the drive for a moment. "I, uh," he began, trying to find the right words. "I don't...I don't really know. I just didn't feel like going home yet."

 

Jared straightened. "Well, in here's a lot more comfortable than out there," he said, an invitation in the tone of his voice.

 

Inside the garage, the light was dim, an occasional oddly placed lamp lit in the big space. Jensen waited until Jared had the door closed before he spoke. "So, what were you doing out here? Working on the bikes this late?"

 

"Yeah," Jared nodded. "But this is where I stay."

 

Jensen smiled and looked around. "What do you mean?"

 

Jared walked over towards the archaic fridge in the corner and opened it. "I mean this is my part of the house," he explained.

 

"You live out here?"

 

Jared bent down to get something out of the fridge. "Yeah," he answered. "You want a beer?"

 

A little surprised, Jensen blinked hard at him. "I'm nineteen," he reminded him.

 

He walked away from the refrigerator, two bottles of beer in his hand. "I didn't ask for your ID," he returned. "I asked if you wanted a drink."

 

Jensen took the beer bottle from him. "Can't you get in trouble for giving me this?"

 

Twisting off the cap, Jared flicked it across the room, not caring where it landed. He flopped down on an old and worn beige sofa, stretching his legs out in front of him to rest upon an aging blue milk crate. "You planning on making this the shortest friendship in history and turning me in?"

 

"No."

 

"Then sit your ass down and we'll watch some _really_ bad TV."

 

An hour later they were on their second beer each, and Cops was playing for what seemed like the tenth time in a row. Jared had nothing but complaints about the officers, and Jensen had to admit that he could see Jared's side. Maybe it was just dramatized for television, but the cops were more than overzealous.

 

Just then, Jensen's phone vibrated in his pocket, alarming him at first. "Shoot," he frowned. "Hold on a second."

 

"Did you just say 'shoot,' you pansy-ass?" Jared laughed.

 

"Shut up," he returned, chuckling with him. "Yeah."

 

"Yeah? Is that how you answer your phone, young man?"

 

His expression sobered. "Dad," he said. "No, I'm sorry. I just...I'm sorry, I shouldn't have--"

 

"Jensen, I'm getting ready to lock the door, do you have your keys?"

 

Swallowing nervously, Jensen nodded his head. "Yes, sir," he answered.

 

"Are you still at your friend's house?"

 

"Yes, sir," he repeated. His heart beat faster with the lie. So what if Alan thought he was still at Chris’s house?

 

"Are you staying the night?"

 

Jensen glanced over at Jared, who was polishing off the last of his beer. "Um, I don't know," he told his father.

 

"You're old enough to make decisions on your own," Alan spoke, sounding rather perturbed. "But it would be nice for you to let your mother and I in on some of them."

 

"Yes, sir," he said yet again. "I'm sorry."

 

Alan hung up without even saying good bye. Jensen snapped his phone closed and tossed it down on the sofa beside him.

 

"What'd General Patton want?" Jared asked, moving to set his beer bottle on the floor, beside the sofa.

 

Smiling, Jensen scrunched his nose slightly and looked at him. "What?"

 

"Well, the way you were 'yessir-ing' him," he said, "I just assumed he was someone as important as Patton."

 

Rolling his eyes, Jensen chuckled. "It was my Dad," he answered.

 

"Oh, so it was Hitler."

 

That got a boisterous laugh out of Jensen. "Tell me about it," he said. "I didn't clear my agenda through him, so he had to check up on me. Ask me if I have my keys and where I'm sleeping."

 

"And?"

 

Jensen looked over at him, shrugging one shoulder. "And what?"

 

"Where are you sleeping?"

 

The question should have made him nervous, but instead he smiled brighter. Normally he was very shy. Perhaps it was the alcohol talking, but he needed a question answered. "Where do you sleep, by the way?"

 

Jared got up from the couch, motioning towards the ceiling. "Up there," he said, making his way to the refrigerator.

 

The clink of bottles barely registered in Jensen's ears. He looked up and saw a second level to the garage. Only about half a floor was there, just enough to make a junky loft for Jared. Amongst the shelves, drawers and odds and ends, there was a box spring and mattress set, propped up on cinder blocks and pallets. The blankets were rumpled and the fitted sheet was pulled off of one corner. Three or four pillows were thrown about, some on the floor, and some crumpled at the head of the bed.

 

"Holy crap, there's a bed up there," Jensen declared. "How do you get up there?"

 

"There's a ladder," Jared replied, motioning to a rickety metal ladder that had been bolted to the wall. He handed Jensen another beer, the cap already twisted off. "Here."

 

"Another one?"

 

"You planning on driving your half-drunk ass home?"

 

"No."

 

"Then take it," he said. "I don't offer just anyone a beer."

 

Jensen smiled and took the bottle. He drank down what was left in his previous one and set it on the floor at his side, as Jared had done earlier. He looked back up to the second floor of the garage, wondering how he had missed it to begin with. Along the rafters, Jensen noticed words stenciled in black paint. "Hey, that's Latin," he said. "Si vis pacum, para bellum."

 

"If you want peace, prepare for war," Jared translated.

 

"Wow, you know Latin, I'm impressed."

 

Jared grinned at him, bringing the bottle of beer up to his mouth. "I might look uneducated," he told him, "but I was a rich boy just like you."

 

The revelation more than surprised Jensen. "Seriously?"

 

Jared nodded, swallowing a mouthful of beer. "Prep school, grammar school, private school, all that shit," he agreed. "Same high society schools that name their halls after the people who donate the most."

 

"Yeah," Jensen nodded. There hadn't been a hall named after his father yet, but there was talk about something like that being mentioned at Jensen's graduation. One last Ackles hurrah. Jensen was just thankful that the hall, if there really was going to be one named after his father, would be something Mackenzie would have to deal with. She and Dad got along much better than he and Jensen did.

 

"Yeah, my Mom used to have this really well-paying job. That's how she met Jeffrey, actually," he explained. "He was working construction on the building across the street. Mom used to watch him out of her office window, and then finally went over to talk to him one day." He smiled fondly, remembering the woman he missed so desperately on some days. "Yeah, she even had me pegged for being a lawyer, if you can imagine that. I was only twelve."

 

"Wow, what happened?"

 

Jared's smile faded. He shrugged his shoulders, peeling the label on his bottle of beer. "She died," he said. "I kinda went south after that."

 

"You miss it?"

 

"Dressing like you and answering 'yes sir, no sir,' to everyone?" he grinned. "Not a second of it."

 

Jensen watched Jared gaze at him for only a moment more before turning and looking back over at the old television set they'd been watching. The conversation was over, apparently. Jared had told him as much as he was going to, and Jensen was satisfied with what he'd learned. He turned to the television too, and smiled when Jared complained at one of the police officers on the show.

 

 

 

 

The light, even though it was dim, could be seen peeking out from underneath the door in a long slant across the kitchen tile. Jeffrey had a habit of getting up in the middle of the night, probably because he usually slept on the sofa. In gym shorts and a T-shirt, he shuffled across the room with bare feet. He opened the garage door, ready to complain to Jared that he needed to stop working and go to bed. It was just a little after two in the morning, but the boy had a tendency to lose track of time when he got working on the bikes.

 

"Jay," he said, his voice thick with sleep.

 

In the corner of the garage, the old black-and-white TV was on. He still didn't understand how Jared had hooked the thing up to the cable, but there it was, in glorious shades of gray. Stepping down the stairs, Jeffrey made his way over to the sofa. He would have reprimanded Jared if the boy had walked through the dirty garage with no shoes on, but he didn't even think of that as he moved towards the old couch.

 

He had to stop and smile when he saw his boy on the sofa, sound asleep. Jared's hair, always a little wavy when grown out, was curled up at his temples and the nape of his neck. His white wife-beater was stained with dark grime, smudged here and there on his arms as well. His jeans were torn in places, showing off the boxer briefs that he wore underneath. His bare feet were dirty, making Jeffrey shake his head at him. He was more his boy than he realized sometimes.

 

Surprising him though, was that beside Jared lay Jensen. He hadn't heard the young man come in during the night. Jensen's trousers were wrinkled, as was his uniform shirt. The tie he normally wore had been taken off and was draped over the arm of the sofa. His cell phone sat nearby, and his brown leather shoes were still on his feet. While Jared was slumped over and resting on a number of pillows, Jensen was propped against him, his head at Jared's shoulder.

 

Smiling, Jeffrey leaned down and untied Jensen's shoes. He gently pulled them off, pausing in his movements when Jensen's breath hitched in his lungs. After moving Jensen's feet up to the sofa, he went back into the house for just a moment, to grab two afghans from the living room couch and recliner. He draped one over Jared and the other over Jensen.

 

Gazing down at them, he shook his head, his smile fading for just a moment. "I hope you know what you're doing, kiddo," he said. But whether he was talking to Jared or Jensen, even he wasn't sure.


	5. Chapter four

When Jensen woke up it took him a moment to remember where he was and then another moment to figure out what had disturbed him. His phone was ringing and he grabbed it, checking the caller ID. His dad. Biting his lip, he pressed the button to reject the call and then quickly turned his phone off. He didn't want to deal with it over the phone. He reached down for his shoes - when had he taken them off? - and started to pull them on. The movement disturbed Jared and he woke slowly.

 

"Hey..." His voice was rough with sleep and he sat up, rubbing at his eyes. He saw Jensen tugging his shoes on and stopped. "You going somewhere?"

 

"Uh."

 

"Let me reiterate. You going somewhere without breakfast?"

 

Jensen shrugged. "Why?"

 

"'Cause Jeffrey makes breakfast every morning."

 

"Seriously?"

 

"What, you don't eat breakfast at your house?"

 

Jensen felt his cheeks flush. "Yeah. If mom gets up in time to make me something, sure."

 

"So... If she doesn't you just starve?"

 

Jensen stood, straightening his clothes. "I am so not explaining this to you. No, I don't starve. We have fruit."

 

Stretching, Jared yawned loudly. "Go inside. I bet you a six-pack he's got french toast waiting for us."

 

Jensen simply huffed out a laugh at that. "Right, like I can possibly buy you a six-pack. I believe you. You happy?"

 

"Sure, whatever." Jared got to his feet and led the way into the house, because it was clear that Jensen wouldn't intrude without a proper invite.

 

Sure enough, Jeffrey was behind the kitchen island, spatula in hand, and there were two plates of french toast on the small kitchen table. "Dig in," he smiled. "There's plenty, but it gets cold fast, kiddo."

 

A little embarrassed that Jeffrey obviously knew he was there already, Jensen sat down at the table and pulled a plate towards him with a quiet thank you. Jared, he noticed, had a very healthy appetite from the way he was currently devouring his meal. Jensen looked at him a moment more, then back down at his plate.

 

"Eat it. It ain't poisoned," Jeffrey joked, and Jensen started to eat as he sat down with his own breakfast, not saying a word when Jared snagged another piece from his plate.

 

"You're not at work today?" Jared asked.

 

"I thought I'd give myself the Saturday off for a change. In case you wanted to do anything."

 

"Li' wha'?" Jared asked, barely comprehensible around a half-slice of bread.

 

"Jay."

 

"Wha'?"

 

"I'm sure you're impressing our guest with your incredible manners."

 

"Vas jus' Jen," he said, smirking. 

 

Jeffrey chuckled, shaking his head. "There's something wrong with you, you know that? And anyway, like anything. It's Saturday, isn't it? The traditional day kids your age go out enjoying themselves."

 

Jared swallowed. "Kids my age? What am I, nine?"

 

"You might as well be, eating like that."

 

Jared licked the crumbs from around his lips, winking at Jensen. "And you're like... A hundred and fifty."

 

" _Jared_."

 

"Sorry," he said, although he was still trying to stifle a smile. "I say we go to the zoo and then stop on the way back home and pick daisies out in the sunshine."

 

Jeffrey pushed his empty plate towards the center of the table. "Fine, go work on your bike then. I'll take Jensen somewhere."

 

"Aw, c'mon! The guy doesn't even have a change of clothes. You can't take him out like that, you'll embarrass both of you. No offense, Jen."

 

Jensen just laughed and pointed across the table at Jared. "You know what, you can go out like that, but I'd get offended."

 

Jeffrey laughed, loud and boisterous, clapping his hand against Jensen's shoulder. "I do believe he's officially part of the family now, Jay. You better watch your back."

 

"Yeah, yeah. Are we going to the zoo or not?"

 

"I'm not taking you to the zoo. You're old enough and damn sure ugly enough to think of something a little more adult."

 

"Strip club?"

 

"Do the fucking dishes, boy."

 

"Hey, easy!" Jared said, holding his hands up. "Don't swear in front of our guest. He has sensitive ears."

 

"Around you, Jay, I think he's gonna learn to not be sensitive real damn fast. Get the dishes done then get changed. And find something for Jensen."

 

 

 

 

Jensen ended up with an old pair of Jared's jeans from before he hit his last growth spurt and a faded Jack Daniels shirt. He felt a mixture of hot and uncomfortable, because these were Jared's old clothes, but on the other hand...They were _Jared's_. He got in the back-seat of Jeffrey's car while Jared settled in the passenger seat and turned the stereo on. Jensen figured Jeffrey must have known exactly where he was going to take them that day because they drove about an hour out of town and ended up on a stretch of land by the river, along with around a hundred classic motorcycles. He wished he could see Jared's face at that point, but he caught the reaction.

 

Jared leant across the front seat and hugged Jeffrey as he was parking the car. "It's like you know me!"

 

"Get off. Idiot," Jeffrey told him, voice filled with affection. "Heard about this from a friend last week. You really think I'd miss a day's work for no reason?"

 

"You're the best!"

 

Jensen was grinning himself as they all got out of the car and Jeffrey locked it up. Jared looked so thrilled that it was hard not to be affected by his excitement. He was glad he was with them, because it would have been kind of overwhelming otherwise. The sound of bike engines revving thrummed through his body and there were stalls set up by the riverside for about a mile. People were racing up and down and there was a large crowd at the other end from where cars were parked, standing in front of a small stage. Speakers set along the walkway broadcast the music that was being played on stage. Jensen's eyes went wide as a huge bear of a man walked past them, holding hands with a tiny blonde. Both were tattooed on every spare inch of skin and Jensen wasn't quite sure if there were any parts of the man's face that weren't pierced. He was incredibly relieved that Jared had lent him some clothes, because he thought if he'd worn his crumpled school uniform he would probably have been killed by now. He walked a little closer to Jeffrey, all the same.

 

"If you boys want to look at anything, just go right ahead. We can meet up later."

 

"Hey, is Eric here?" Jared asked, looking over people's heads.

 

"Yeah, I think he said something about having a stall here. You thinking of more work?"

 

"Maybe. C'mon, Jensen." Jared grabbed Jensen's arm and gave him no choice but to follow. "See ya later, Jeff."

 

"Take care of him," Jeffrey said, more under his breath, as the two of them headed into the crowds.

 

 

 

Eric had long grey hair, pulled back under a black bandanna. He wore leather pants and a worn Woodstock teeshirt with a black vest over it, hanging open. He smiled at Jared and his teeth were yellowed from nicotine. He also had tattoos up and down either arm and they curled around his wrists and over his fingers, too. 

 

He stood up to shake hands with Jared, pulling him into a hug when he had a hold of him. "Jay! Long time no see. And who's this?"

 

"This is a new friend, Jensen."

 

"You thinking about getting some ink, kid?"

 

"Uh-"

 

"Probably not, but I am," Jared interrupted, saving him. 

 

"Lemme guess, you're just dying to fill the gap in your left sleeve?"

 

Jared laughed. "It's kind of noticeable, yeah."

 

"What're you thinking of?"

 

"I don't know yet. I was hoping you could suggest something to fit in?"

 

Eric nodded, motioning Jared to sit down. He tugged his shirt up and Jensen was treated to a better view of his tattoos again, this time a little less embarrassed about standing there and staring at them. Eric gripped Jared's arm gently, turning it to check the other work that adorned his skin. Then he clicked his tongue against his teeth, sitting back while Jared pulled his shirt back into place. "Yup. I got an idea. I'll get something drawn up. You stop by the end of the week and we'll do it."

 

"Thanks, man," Jared said, shaking his hand again. 

 

"Sure your friend doesn't want anything?"

 

Jared grinned at Jensen. "Not yet. C'mon, let's take a look at some of the bikes."

 

They took a slow walk up in the direction of the stage, knowing it would take them a while to reach it because there was too much to look at on the way. Harleys of every shape and size were parked along the route and Jared kept stopping and pointing stuff out, asking questions of the owners. They checked out a few more stalls and Jensen was more than glad he had his wallet with him because he had to buy some shades since his eyes were hurting. Jared gave him his opinion on all the pairs he tried on and eventually settled on some that didn't make him look 'like even more of a dork' than he already was. Jensen had to admit, despite his very first impression of Jared, the guy was actually pretty fun to hang out with. He even managed to ignore the fact that Jared was looking even hotter today than he had the other night at dinner.

 

At least, he managed to ignore it until they met up with Jeffrey again. By then it was nearing midday and, despite the breeze, the sun was still very hot. Jensen knew he was going to burn and wished he had some sunscreen to put on. Jared obviously had no such worries as he swore, declared it was hotter than a snake's ass in a wagon rut, and tugged off his teeshirt, stuffing it under the belt of his jeans. And there were those nipple rings again, glinting on his chest. Jensen felt himself grow even warmer and concentrated on everything but Jared so he wouldn't make a fool of himself. 

 

They made it to the stage and Jensen was starting to sweat. He almost felt like joining Jared and taking his own shirt off, but he didn't want to get burnt worse than he already was and he definitely didn't want everyone looking at his completely un-tattooed body. He'd feel like a freak. 

 

He and Jared followed Jeffrey right up to the edge of the stage and Jensen stopped, uncertain, when the older man climbed the few steps up onto the stage itself. He turned to Jared who just grinned and drummed his fingers on his thighs. 

 

"What's he doing?"

 

"Well, given that the guy on stage is one of his good friends I'm guessing he's gonna join him and play a little something."

 

"Huh. You didn't tell me he was in a band."

 

"He ain't. He just likes to play now and again."

 

Jensen wondered if he was any good and his question was soon answered as Jeffrey grabbed a spare guitar and began the intro of a song he knew well. His friend sang his heart out to it and Jensen didn't even notice himself joining in until Jared nudged him in the ribs with his elbow. It didn't make him stop, though. He sang louder, realising he hadn't felt this comfortable in a crowd of so many people in a long time.

 

 

 

Jensen was surprised how long the show went on. It grew dark around them and Jeffrey bought them some barbecue and a beer and they began walking back to the car while they ate. Jared had, thankfully, put his shirt back on so at least Jensen didn't have that distraction to worry about while they walked. He could feel the sting along his arms and the back of his neck from where his skin was undoubtedly glowing red and hot. 

 

They arrived back at Jeffrey's at ten and Jared opened up the garage door while Jeffrey fetched some more beers out from inside the house. Jensen watched as they set out chairs and sat down with Jeffrey while Jared dragged out an old gas bottle with a hole cut out of the side. He lit a fire inside it and they pulled their chairs closer to it, drinking quietly at first. It was comfortable and odd, Jensen thought. He couldn't imagine doing something like this at his own home. He felt a small pang of guilt as he wondered what his parents were thinking right now. He'd left his phone off for most of the day, checking it once at midday to find three voicemails from his father and a missed call from his sister. They had no idea where he was and, for the moment, he didn't much care. They'd probably assume he was still with Chris and they didn't know his number to check, which was just as well. 

 

Jeffrey fetched his guitar out after another half hour and sat strumming out a nonsense tune, the sound soothing and sleepy. 

 

He turned to Jensen after a while, noticed him watching the movements of his fingers and stopped. "You play?"

 

"Sort of. Not well."

 

"Want to try?"

 

Jensen held a hand up, shaking his head. "Not right now. I'd rather listen to you."

 

"Mm." Jeffrey smiled, content, and went back to his lullaby. That was what it sounded like, Jensen decided, as he settled down even more in his seat and felt his eyes grow droopy.

 

"I'm guessing you're not intending on going anywhere tonight," Jared said, after a while.

 

The comment made Jensen sit up, blushing. "Uh." He hadn't even considered that they might actually want him to go home tonight. "I'm sorry, I can get a cab or something-"

 

"Hey, I didn't mean it like that, man. I was just stating the obvious. You can stay. But you might want to go see your folks tomorrow, before they come hunting us down and putting our heads on pikes."

 

Jensen laughed. "Yeah. I guess so. Where do...Where should I sleep?"

 

"You can share the garage with me again." Jared grinned over at him, teeth shining in the firelight. "I don't bite, promise."

 

They cleared up and Jeffrey said goodnight to the both of them before heading inside the house. Jared closed up the garage and stripped down to his shorts, leaving Jensen at ground level as he climbed the ladder to what was essentially his bedroom. Jensen sat on the couch and looked up as Jared called to him from above. 

 

"What're you doing?"

 

"I'm...The couch?"

 

"Come on up here. Way comfier."

 

"Um.."

 

"Don't be a pussy about it. Just come on up. It's perfectly safe. I've been sleeping up here for the last nine years and I'm fine."

 

Jensen sighed, knowing Jared wouldn't let up until he gave in. He took off his shoes and jeans and climbed the ladder in shorts, socks and teeshirt. Jared was already stretched out on top of the sheets. The garage was pretty hot at this level and Jensen laid down next to him, stiffening up as Jared shifted onto his side. 

 

"You can relax, you know."

 

"I know."

 

"You never just camped out with a friend before?"

 

Jensen managed to force his muscles to relax a little bit, his breath catching when Jared exhaled, warming his shoulder. He hummed softly, for about half a second before he stopped himself. "Friend?"

 

"Sure. I think we can safely say we're friends. Let me guess, you don't have many."

 

"I have...a few. One at school and the rest are people he knows. They talk to me."

 

Jared nodded. "Only friend I ever had before you was Jeff. Only other person I ever hung out with besides him was my parole officer."

 

Jensen bit his lip and didn't ask. He knew if Jared wanted to tell him, he would. He just wasn't entirely sure he wanted to hear it. Instead he changed the subject, looking over at Jared and then pointedly down at the tattoo on his left shoulder. The tiger's face seemed to glare back at him, the growling face both unnerving and beautiful. Around the other side of his shoulder there was a dragon, its tail intertwined with the tiger. "So what made you get into tattoos?"

 

Jared shrugged. "People in juvie had 'em. I decided I wanted some for myself. When I moved back in with Jeff he made me finish school and got me a little work experience with Eric, cause they were friends at the time. Eric did Jeff's tattoos. Maybe a mistake on his part, right? I got Eric to do my first one as soon as I could. He took some persuading, but I'll bet he's glad now. I got hooked. He's made a lot of money out of me."

 

"Do they mean anything?"

 

"Yeah. They all mean something. This one," he tapped his shoulder, then stroked his finger along the dragon's tail. "This is me and Jeff. And this right here?" He tugged slightly at his shorts, pulling them down enough to uncover the tattoo on his hip: a wolf's face peering out through the outline of a paw-print. "That was my first one. To remind me that it's just me in this world on my own."

 

"It's really cool," Jensen said, feeling lame for saying it. He wanted to ask about the others that covered most of Jared's chest and both his arms, but he felt Jared would explain them in time. He'd already noticed the latin phrase that he'd seen decorating the beams of the garage was inked across the inside of Jared's right wrist. He wondered why the phrase held so much importance to Jared. Again, he knew, it was something he would learn in time. He focused, found himself staring at Jared's chest again. "Why the piercings then? Why just there and nowhere else?" He thought about the pierced guy they'd seen earlier that day. He was surprised Jared didn't have more.

 

Jared just gave him a wicked grin and answered, "Because it makes everything feel good."

 

"Like what?"

 

"What do you _think_?"

 

Jensen realised what he meant then and clamped his mouth shut, his cheeks flushing. 

 

"You're really fun to mess with, you know that? Too easy."

 

"Shut up."

 

Jared just laughed quietly to himself, but didn't say anything more. Eventually his breathing evened out and Jensen finally felt comfortable enough to turn onto his side, away from Jared, and try to get to sleep.

 

 

 

 

For the second morning in a row he woke up slightly disoriented, though the reason that morning was not so much his whereabouts as the fact that Jared was pressed against his back, drooling quietly on his neck. He could feel the cold patch of damp there, just above his collar. Rather than make him feel repulsed, he found that it was kind of comfortable. Less comfortable, however, was the hard-on he realised he was nursing. Shit. He wriggled forward, slightly, to try and get away from Jared without waking him, but it didn't work so well. Jared's lips smacked and he moaned and wasn't that just the best sound ever?

 

Jensen reached down and pressed the heel of his hand between his legs, keeping on his side as Jared woke up. He kept his breathing as calm as he could while he concentrated on something else, willing his erection away. 

 

There was a muffled laugh from behind him and he froze. "Oh, man. I drooled all over you."

 

"Yeah," Jensen agreed, his voice stiff.

 

"You okay?"

 

"Sure."

 

Jared flopped onto his back, heaving a sigh. He checked his watch and groaned. "I should still be asleep. It's only eight-thirty."

 

_What_?. Jensen sat up quickly. "Eight-thirty? I have to get going, my dad'll kill me. I'm supposed to go with them to church for nine-thirty."

 

"Relax. It's a Sunday. I don't think Christians are allowed to murder anyone on Jesus-day."

 

"You don't know my dad. He's a lawyer so he can get away with it, too." Jensen got out of bed and quickly climbed down to the lower floor. He found his uniform from Friday, glad he'd thought to hang it over the back of a chair. It was still slightly crumpled, but definitely better than turning up in jeans and a teeshirt. He looked up as he peeled off the tee, wincing as it scraped his sunburn, and saw Jared looking down at him from the edge of his mattress.

 

"You're really leaving to go to church?"

 

"I have to. I'm sorry, I'd love to hang out, but-"

 

"It's no problem. You want a lift?"

 

"Uh..I'd better not."

 

"Oh, that's right. They don't know you're here. Sure." Jared rooted around at the foot of his bed and then tossed down a can of deodorant. "Since you don't have time for a shower."

 

Jensen thanked him as he disappeared from view. He sprayed plenty on and then pulled his clothes on, tucking the shirt in and fastening his belt. He really did wish he could stay, but he'd already pushed it way too far this weekend. He had homework to catch up on and somehow would have to explain to his dad what he'd been up to for the last two nights. 

 

"Hey, Jared? Thanks. For everything. Can you pass that on to Jeff?"

 

"Pass it on yourself next time you're here," Jared replied, and Jensen at least knew he wasn't mad. He said goodbye and headed outside where he called for a cab. He then called Chris, who was just on his way out to church himself, to ask him to cover for him if his dad asked where he'd been.

 

"Where _have_ you been?"

 

"I'll tell you tomorrow. I owe you one."


	6. Chapter five

  
Author's notes: **Two chapters today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

The study was quiet and tidy. Alan preferred everything that way, especially his home life. Everything was always in order. There were never any surprises. 

 

That was why, when his son suddenly acted out of the ordinary, Alan was out of sorts. He, of course, had done his best with the boy. He’d given him everything that he hadn't had as a child and, for the past nineteen years, Jensen had acted exemplary. His grades were all A's, he had good morals and he was well liked by his teachers. 

 

Alan just didn't understand where this sudden lack of responsibility had come from.

 

"Dad."

 

Alan didn't turn away from the window, recognizing his eldest child's voice. 

 

"It's time to go."

 

He nodded his head at Josh. "Your brother?"

 

Josh frowned as he stood in the doorway of the study. "He...he's not here."

 

Setting his jaw in anger, Alan nodded again. He straightened the lapels of his suit jacket and turned away from the window. He smiled at Josh, over-friendly. "Well, then," he said, "let's get a move-on."

 

Josh watched him walk past, pausing long enough to pat him on the shoulder. He didn't know what Jensen was up to, but he hoped his brother made good. Dad could hold a grudge forever. 

 

After gathering up Donna, Mackenzie and Josh's girlfriend, the two men of the house shepherded everyone out of the house. When they were down the front steps, they finally saw Jensen. The family all came to a halt, except Donna. She smiled and neared her son, clasping his hands in hers. 

 

"Jensen, sweetheart," she whispered. "Where have you _been_?"

 

"I'm sorry, Mom," he apologized. "I was with Chris all weekend and we just got busy."

 

"With what, for Heaven's sake?"

 

He tilted his head, trying to come up with the quickest lie he could. "With the band," he finally said.

 

"Donna," Alan interrupted. He separated her and Jensen and gently pushed her away. "Go wait in the car, please."

 

"But, Alan."

 

" _Now_." 

 

She knew not to push him. Quickly, she gave in and put her arm around Mackenzie. They, Josh and Cathy headed for the cars. 

 

Alan remained motionless for only a moment and then, with anger in his eyes, turned towards his youngest son. Jensen was still in his school uniform, now wrinkled from overuse. There was the slightest of blondish-brown beard stubble on the boy's chin and he reeked of cheap deodorant. "Just what is it that you think you're pulling, young man?"

 

Jensen shook his head, gazing over at his father. "I don't think I'm pulling anything," he answered. 

 

"Look at you," Alan snarled at him.

 

Jensen frowned and looked down at his wrinkled clothes. "I'm sorry, Dad," he returned. "I lost track of time."

 

"I don’t think that you expect me to believe that."

 

"Dad."

 

"I won't be seen with you like that."

 

"Fine," Jensen shrugged, his own anger starting to boil beneath the surface. "I won't go then."

 

"Alan?" Donna called. She had stepped from inside the vehicle to urge them on.

 

Turning, Alan looked over at his wife, attempting a reassuring smile. "Alright, dear," he said to her, waving her back into the car. He turned back to Jensen and pointed a finger in his face. "You're not getting out of church just because you were ignorant. Get in the car. And I don't want to hear a peep out of you."

 

Jensen suppressed a sigh. He followed his father to the car, shoved himself in the back seat and gazed out the window on the drive to church. Neither Mom or Dad talked; the ride was painfully silent. Church was equally uncomfortable. Jensen sat closest to the large stained-glass windows, his father on the aisle side of the pews. Just as well; he preferred to be as far away from the man as possible for the time being. He felt like everyone's eyes were on him, but the most important gaze was from his father. He could almost feel the anger as a solid presence, could just about taste the disappointment. 

 

All throughout the service Jensen thought about Chris, wondering what he had said. Alan had cornered the young man before church started and grilled him. Dad was a lawyer, he knew how to ask some tough questions. Jensen had been unable to get to Chris before Alan spoke to him. All he could do was watch from a distance, praying that Chris's words would calm Alan down, rather than fuel his anger.

 

During the service, Jensen quietly sang along with the congregation, pretending that nothing was wrong. As he did, he glanced over at his father, seeing the man return the look. He tried to apologize with just his eyes, but his father was blind to it. After the service, everyone filed out of the church, smiling and greeting each other happily. The Ackles family was well-known and they all acted as though life was grand. 

 

Outside, cars were beginning to leave the packed parking lot. In the sunshine, Jensen made a beeline for the car until he felt a hand clamp down upon his shoulder.

 

"Joshua, take your mother and sister home," Alan said, looking over at his eldest. He didn't let go of Jensen.

 

"But, Dad," Josh said. "Cath and I were going to--"

 

"Joshua, don't make me repeat myself."

 

After a moment of silence, Josh nodded his head and held his hand out to Mackenzie. "Come on, creep," he said without a smile. She readily took his hand, glancing back at her mother as they headed towards Josh's car.

 

Jensen watched his family leave, wishing with every fiber of his being that they would stay. His father's grip was tight on his shoulder, not letting him run away as he felt like doing. Eyes drifting closed for just a moment, Jensen tried not to sigh too loudly.

 

"Jensen," Alan said. "Let's go for a drive."

 

"Yes, sir," he answered softly. He went with his father, seating himself in the passenger's seat. It was silent in the car until Dad finally got out onto the highway; he was taking the long way home. "Dad, I'm really sorry."

 

"Did I address you, son?"

 

"No," he said. "I'm just trying to say I'm sorry."

 

" _Why_ are you sorry?"

 

"You _know_ why, Dad."

 

"Yes, but I'm not convinced that you know why, Jensen."

 

Taking a deep breath, Jensen figured he should be used to this. Rarely, Dad accepted an apology. And if he did, he held a grudge, and would remind you of your past mistakes years down the road. "I...I should have called," he admitted. "I know I should have."

 

"Yes, the voicemails we left should have been an indication that we were worried."

 

"I know," he nodded. "I...I don't have an excuse."

 

"What if something serious had happened to your brother, to your sister? Or God forbid, your mother? What then?" he asked sternly. 

 

"I don't know," he said, a note of sadness and defeat in his voice. 

 

"Or, what if something happens to you one day? If you keep disappearing like this, how are we to know when something is really wrong?"

 

"Like this?" he asked. "You say that like I've done this a million times before."

 

"Answer my question, son."

 

He sighed, not bothering to quiet it this time. "I don't know," he repeated.

 

"I talked to your friend, Chris," Alan continued. "He told me that you were there with him all weekend, but I'm not sure he's being truthful."

 

Swallowing nervously, Jensen glanced over at his father. "He is," he lied.

 

Alan met his son's eyes for a moment. "The world is a cruel place, son," he warned. "You can't put your trust in just anyone."

 

He was tired of the conversation, of getting verbally bashed about. "I get it, Dad."

 

"No, I don't think you do, JR," Alan said, using the old nickname that Jensen was called when he was a child. He knew that Jensen hated the name, and used it only when he thought his son was being immature. "I'm going to ask you this once and only once, and you are going to tell me the truth, do you understand?"

 

Jensen looked away from him, facing the passenger's side window.

 

"Were you with that boy and his father?" Alan asked. "The ones that came for dinner the other night?"

 

_Yeah, well_ , Jensen thought silently, _he always did know everything anyway_. Sighing, Jensen spoke while gazing out the window at the passing traffic and scenery. "Yes," he answered.

 

Alan's hands tightened on the steering wheel. "That is precisely the kind of company that we do not keep, JR," he reprimanded. 

 

He was furious at the statement. Turning, he looked directly at his father. " _You_ kept it," he reminded him, daring in his voice.

 

Alan let go of the steering wheel with one hand and pointed a warning finger in his son's face. "Do _not_ use that tone with me," he snapped. "Your _mother_ made that decision, not me. I kept up appearances, but that's it."

 

Shaking his head, Jensen turned back to the passenger window. He remembered Jeffrey's reprimand to Jared; fatherly, stern words or a gentle physical reminder, and then all was forgotten. Life went on. Not with Alan, however. Things were talked about, re-hashed again and again. Squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, Jensen pinched at the bridge of his nose where a headache was brewing.

 

"Now," Alan began, breaking the momentary silence. "You're going to go home, go up in your room and not show your face again until you have all your homework done. I want to see it."

 

Jensen clenched his jaw. _I'm not nine years old anymore, Dad_ , he wanted to say. 

 

"And as punishment for your behaviour, and your lying about it all, you're grounded for one week," he continued.

 

Whipping his head around, Jensen looked mortally wounded. "A week?" he repeated. "Dad, that's unfair."

 

"You'd prefer two weeks then?" he challenged. "You said it yourself, Jensen. You _have_ no excuse."

 

He clamped his mouth shut, teeth grinding as he stared at his father. "No, sir," he finally said. "One week."

 

"A wise decision," Alan nodded. "And you won't see this boy and his father again."

 

 

 

 

He was sure Jared didn't know his phone number. 

 

That didn't stop Jensen from keeping the cell with him all the time, checking it again and again to see if he'd missed any calls.

 

His homework technically didn't take him as long as he made out that it did. Instead, he found comfort in the seclusion of his room. The more he stayed away from Dad, the better he felt. He and Alan had never truly seen eye to eye, but Jensen had been raised to respect his elders, not to question them. He had always been the peacemaker between he and his father, the first to always come forward and apologize even if he felt he hadn't done anything wrong. It had made him...not Jensen.

 

Laying on his bed, Jensen started to think about that fact. Who was he? What did he want out of life? Was the desire to go to med-school really his, or was it his father's? Gnawing at his bottom lip, Jensen decided that no, he really did want to be in the medical field. Dad at least got that part right. But the questions got him to thinking more. Jared seemed so sure of himself, happy with who he was even though he didn't have anything near the opportunities Jensen did now. 

 

Interrupting his thoughts, there was a knock at the door. Jensen sat up on his bed and swung his legs over the side. "Yeah," he said.

 

The door opened, revealing Alan on the other side. In his hands, he had a tray that held a plateful of food; something gourmet. Donna wasn't that much of a cook - sure, she could make a few good things, but the cooking was mostly left to Maricruz, the housekeeper. It had smelled divine while she was making it, but Jensen still hadn't left his room all day. Now that the food was there before him, he realized how hungry he really was.

 

"Still working on schoolwork?"

 

Jensen remained seated upon his mattress. "Yeah," he said again, though it was a lie. He'd been done for quite awhile. 

 

"They gave you quite a haul on Friday."

 

"Yeah," he repeated. 

 

Alan didn't need someone to tell him that his son was upset with him. That much was clear. He wasn't one to go back on his word though. A punishment was a punishment. Without a smile, Alan handed the tray over to his son. "Your mother sent that up."

 

Clear boundaries. Dad wanted him to know that he hadn't sent it up to him. For a split second, Jensen had the need to ask if his father even really loved him. That was silly, he decided. Of course Dad loved him. But the question didn't wholly leave him, instead stuck in the back of his mind.


	7. Chapter six

He tried to muddle through his week, but Dad's words wouldn't stop bouncing around in his head.

 

" _And you won't see this boy and his father again._ "

 

He knew he shouldn't be so upset. He'd only known Jared and Jeffrey for a matter of a couple of days. Still, he couldn't help but feel that he and Jared had really made a connection. And regardless of all the money and lavishness Jensen had in life, it seemed that what Jared and Jeffrey had was exactly what he wanted. He was tired of constantly being judged, each action scrutinized. He was tired of being treated like he was something more than he felt he truly was.

 

The week dragged by and he knew it was because he wanted it to be over. Nothing worth waiting for ever came quickly. So many people used to tell him that when he was a child and getting excited in the build-up to Christmas - despite the fact each one was usually filled with disappointment - and it was no different now. And yet, he wondered what he was going to do come the weekend. Technically, he was grounded until Sunday. He was pretty sure by then he would be clinically insane.

 

"Hey, man."

 

Jensen turned at the greeting. Chris was nearing him, raking his fingers through his hair. "Hey," Jensen greeted. He continued on his way, looking down at the floor as he walked.

 

"You still bummed, I take it?"

 

Jensen nodded, adjusting his backpack on his shoulder. "Kind of," he agreed. "I'm just not looking forward to a whole weekend being grounded. I'm going to be so bored."

 

"Screw that," Chris said, waving away Jensen's words. The man was always overly positive. Some days it helped Jensen, other days he found it annoying. "I may not be able to be there to keep you company, but your Dad didn't say you weren't allowed on AOL."

 

Jensen smiled as they pushed through the front doors to the school. "Yeah, I guess."

 

Chris draped his arm over Jensen's shoulders as they walked. "You're off to the bus stop, right?"

 

"Yeah."

 

"I'll walk with you."

 

"Ooh, look there," someone said in a mocking voice. "Jenny and his boyfriend are off for a stroll together."

 

Jensen knew the annoying voice belonged to Doug. His smile vanished and his eyes hardened. "Shut up, Doug," he said, but not really loud enough for his classmate to hear. 

 

"What's the matter, Doug?" Chris called over his shoulder. "Upset that you're still a virigin? Yeah, I would be too."

 

"Shut up, Kane," he snarled back.

 

Jensen laughed, glancing back to Doug just once. "I don't know how you do it," he said as they continued on their way. "I try to stand up to him..."

 

"Well, he hasn't beat on me every day since Kindergarten either," Chris reminded him. "You've been an easy target for him for all these years."

 

Jensen turned and looked at him, sobered by his friend's words. "Thank you."

 

Chris laughed, ruffling Jensen's short-cropped hair. "You know what I mean," he said. He let go of Jensen as they started through the parking lot to the school. "You are an easy target though, Jen, you gotta admit it. But you know I'll fight for you 'til my dying day."

 

Chris' last few words were said breathy and with forced emotion. Jensen laughed, and shoved him away. "You're such a freak."

 

" _Me_?" Chris chuckled. "You got it backwards, man."

 

Interrupting their conversation, there came the sound of a motor being revved. Jensen turned, remembering the sound of Jared's bike when they were working on it in the garage. He shielded his eyes to the late afternoon sunlight and studied the figure nearing the school. A smile began to spread across his face when he saw the word Suicycle scribed on the back of the bike.

 

"It's him," Jensen said, his voice soft.

 

"What?" 

 

Jensen reached out and patted Chris's shoulder excitedly. "It's him."

 

Jared pulled up to them, stopping fast. The tires of the bike skidded against the pavement, making Chris take a step back out of fear. Jensen remained where he was, however. He couldn't wipe the smile off his face, staring over at the helmeted driver.

 

Jared flipped up the visor on the helmet and looked over at Jensen. "What's up?"

 

Jensen couldn't see his face entirely, but he was pretty sure Jared was smiling at him. "What are you doing out here?"

 

Letting the bike idle, Jared sat up and pulled off his gloves. He set them on the gas tank and then reached up to unfasten the chin strap on the helmet. "Just driving around," he said. Of course, that was a lie, but he wouldn't admit it to Jensen. He had actually mentioned to Jeffrey, the night before, that he wondered what had happened to the pipsqueak that had spent the weekend with them. He'd almost gotten used to the kid being around. 

 

Chris watched as Jared pulled the helmet off. He saw the barest hint of the tattoo on Jared's arm when his sleeve rode up a bit too high.

 

"Oh, this is Chris," Jensen said, motioning to his friend.

 

Jared nodded to him and then reached across the bike. "Hey, man," he greeted.

 

Chris smiled and shook Jared's hand. "Nice bike," he said. 

 

"Thanks," he replied. He apparently had nothing further to say to Chris, because he turned to Jensen again then. "You wanna go for a ride?"

 

Jensen's happy demeanor quickly melted away. His shoulders slumped and he looked down at his shoes. "I can't," he answered. "I'm grounded."

 

Tonguing his teeth for a second, Jared shrugged his shoulders. "For what?" he asked. He watched Jensen meet his eyes for just a second. "Not the Sunday thing."

 

Jensen nodded. "Yeah," he agreed. "Chris tried to cover for me, but Dad found out." He met Chris's eyes for a moment, still frowning, and then looked back over at Jared. "He's demanding that I stay away from you and Jeff too."

 

"What the fuck for?" 

 

Jensen shrugged. "I don't know," he said. "I don't get it either."

 

"No offense, Jen, but your Dad's an asshole," Jared said. 

 

Chris chuckled and nodded in agreement, while Jared reached towards the back of the bike.

 

"What time does he get home?" 

 

Jensen shrugged at Jared. "Six?" he answered. "It depends on how court went."

 

Smiling, Jared shoved a helmet at Jensen. It thumped against his chest, making him grunt, more out of surprise than pain. "What Dad don't know, won't hurt him," he said.

 

Jensen looked down at the helmet, over at Jared and then at Chris. He saw his friend give him a look that said, I don't know, man. Still, he smiled brightly. He shimmied into the shoulder straps of his backpack and took the helmet from Jared.

 

"Jen," Chris warned.

 

"Don't worry," Jensen said, jamming the helmet on. "I'm not going to ask you to lie for me again."

 

"That's not it," he returned. "You know I would no matter what. But if your Dad finds out..." He glanced over at Jared, who had already put his own helmet back on, and was fastening the chin strap. He wished the man would simply say something to deter Jensen.

 

"He won't," Jensen assured him. He hopped on the back of the bike, settling against Jared, while the man put his leather gloves back on. "I'll be home before he knows it."

 

"Jensen..."

 

Jared flipped down the visor on his helmet and revved the engine. He peeled out of the parking lot, leaving Chris to turn away, shielding his eyes against the dust that blew in his face. 

 

"Jen!" Chris called one last time, even though he knew it was futile. Sighing, he watched the bike speed away, the two men moving as one on the vehicle. "Your Dad's going to kill you," he said softly.

 

 

 

 

Jensen didn't even care where they ended up. Even if they ended up at his house, he decided that he could make it through until Sunday. He wasn't even properly processing things around him at first. Finally, he realized that his hands were at Jared's waist, their thighs just barely touching. Jensen's chest was just inches away from Jared's back. 

 

Breaking into his thoughts, Jensen felt a hand tap his. He looked around Jared's shoulder, watching as the man turned to him as best he could.

 

"Hold on tighter," Jared told him, shouting over the sound of the bike.

 

"Why?" Jensen asked, his own words muffled by the helmet.

 

Jared didn't say anything in return. Instead, he pointed directly ahead of them. He had managed to find a relatively deserted stretch of road that was reasonably straight. Jensen had an idea of what Jared was about to do, and felt his heart pound in his chest. He wrapped his arms around Jared's midriff and felt the man pat his hands one last time. 

 

The bike took off like a shot. It was frightening and exhilarating at the same time. Jensen started out with his eyes closed, but after a second or two he wanted to see the scenery passing with flying colors. He laughed loudly as Jared continued down the stretch of road at break-neck speed. He loved the feel of the wind against their bodies, adored the feel of his arms around Jared's waist.

 

It was hard to hear the wailing at first, but eventually Jensen realized that he was hearing a police siren amongst the rushing of the wind. He turned and looked behind them, seeing a police car in the distance. Jared had easily broken the speed limit, and the cop was going to have a field day. He didn't bother to call out to Jared; he saw the man glancing into the rear-view mirrors. Instead of slowing down, though, he kicked the bike up a notch and weaved in and out of the few cars that they had caught up to.

 

The bike eventually slowed, turning into a packed parking lot. Jared didn't park in one of the spots available. Instead, he headed around to the back of the building and turned the motorcycle off. They heard the cop car speed past the building they were hiding behind, sirens blaring, and Jensen laughed as he tugged at the chin strap on the helmet. 

 

"How many times have you done that?" he asked.

 

Jared swung his leg off the bike and pulled his helmet off, standing tall. "Enough that you'd think they'd know better by now," he answered. 

 

Jensen rested his helmet on the back of the bike, still smiling. When he turned back to Jared, he found the man staring at him. He waited for Jared to speak, but only silence prevailed. Smile fading, he stared up at him. "What?" he finally asked.

 

Setting his helmet down upon the front seat of the bike, Jared frowned. "We gotta do something with your uniform."

 

"What's wrong with it?" Jensen asked, looking down at his clothes. 

 

"It's a uniform," Jared said. He thought for a moment and then pulled at the shoulder strap to Jensen's backpack. "Put that behind the bike, no one will see it."

 

Jensen slipped off the backpack and rested it between the motorcycle and the wall to the building. "Where are we, anyway?" he asked, turning back.

 

Jared reached out and tugged on Jensen's tie. "Mickey's," he answered. The tie was quickly shed, draped over the back seat of the bike. "A place Jeff comes to a lot after work." With just his thumb and forefinger, Jared unbuttoned Jensen's collar enough to hook his finger into it and pull it open. "What've you got on underneath that?"

 

Jared managed to get a look before Jensen could curl into himself, hiding from the prying eyes. Jared’s garage was one thing, but out here in the open? "Nothing," he said, a little annoyed. "What are you doing?"

 

"You're going into a bar with a bunch of bikers and truckers," Jared told him. "They see you looking like a pansy-ass, you're going to be an easy target."

 

Jensen narrowed his eyes at him. "Why does everyone keep telling me I'm an easy target today?"

 

Jared smiled. "Maybe because you are." He took off his leather jacket and handed it to Jensen, leaving himself in just his jeans and a ratty T-shirt. "Here. Put this on," he commanded. 

 

"Why?"

 

"It makes you look like less of a Mama's boy."

 

Jensen was pretty sure he should be offended, but the reality of what was going on hit him. Jared was protecting him. Either that, or he was actually protecting himself - he probably didn't want to get into a fight because of the company he kept. Thoughts sobered, Jensen followed the man to the front door of the building.

 

Inside, the place was smoky, the dim lighting dominated by old neon signs. The cheap carpet on the floor was thin, worn to the cement floor in places. The ceiling was yellowed from years of smoke exposure, and the air felt heavy, smelling of stale beer, cigar smoke and leather. Classic rock music was piped through aging speakers, loud enough to be heard, but not so loud that it impeded conversation.

 

If the uniform didn't give him away, the look on Jensen's face surely did. Eyes wide, he looked around. The patrons were young and old alike, scruffy and tattooed. They wore leather, chains and biker boots. Most of them had beer guts that hung over their belts, while bandanas were tied around their heads to keep their long hair out of their eyes. At first, Jensen was pretty sure there wasn't more than an eighth grade education in the entire room, but then he remembered how Jared had surprised him like that. He could very well be selling some of these guys short.

 

Some.

 

"Padalecki!"

 

Jared's name wasn't shouted in a very friendly way. The snarl made Jensen turn around and look at the bartender, who was half-leaning over the bar and pointing at him.

 

"How old is that little prick?"

 

Jared laughed and waved the bartender's question away. "He's twenty-one, Rock," he answered.

 

"Bullshit," Rock answered. "Get him out of here."

 

"When was the last time I lied to you, baby?" Jared asked, setting both palms upon his chest. "I'm offended."

 

Rock frowned and shook his head. "You got 'til your old man gets here."

 

Jensen followed Jared over to an unused pool table, warily watching the bartender go back to his work. "Why..." he began, pausing long enough to catch up to Jared. "Why do they call him Rock?"

 

"See that scar on his forehead?" he asked, nodding towards the man.

 

"Yeah?"

 

"Took a spill on his bike, right?" he explained, choosing a couple of cue sticks. "Flew twenty feet and hit this huge-ass boulder head-on."

 

Jensen winced, glancing over at Rock. "And he survived?"

 

Jared's smile vanished in a heartbeat and he shook his head. "No," he said, handing Jensen one of the cue sticks.

 

Jensen then realized the silliness of his question and rolled his eyes. "I didn't mean it like that," he smiled. “It’s just kind of…unlikely.”

 

Jared chuckled and nodded towards the pool table. "Come on, college stuff," he said. "We got time for a couple games before Jeffrey gets here."

 

They played for money; Jared never played any other way. Jensen won the first game of pool, but he was pretty sure that Jared let him win because he wasn't exactly a pro at the game. He'd played before with Chris, but not enough to really consider himself a player.

 

By the end of the second game, Jensen decided that maybe he was being taken advantage of. Jared started to show his skills, and Jensen started to dig deeper into his wallet. By the end of the third game, Jensen narrowed his eyes at Jared's outstretched hand. 

 

"You're hustling me, aren't you?"

 

Jared laughed, wiggling his fingers at him. "Pay up, hot stuff," he teased. 

 

Still glaring, Jensen smiled and handed over the money.

 

"Come on, one more game."

 

"I don't think so," Jensen said, giving in. "I lose any more money, and I'll be eating packages of saltines from the salad bar at lunch."

 

Jared fished one of the fives out of the pile he'd taken from Jensen. He pulled open the boy's pocket and shoved the bill inside. "This one's on me," he said.

 

Sighing dramatically, Jensen tried to pretend that the little moments like that, that he and Jared shared, weren't going to be imprinted upon his memory for the rest of time. He wondered if he could remain just Jared's friend. Could he really watch Jared get close to a girl and still hang out with him? He decided, as he racked up the pool balls, that he would cross that bridge when he got there.

 

Jared broke and sunk the three ball straight away. He set his hands against the edge of the pool table and leaned against his arms, trying to determine his next shot. That's when the night started to fall apart. 

 

A man neared the pool table, sporting a long white beard, a bandana on his head, and leather from head to toe. Between his teeth was the stub of a cigar, and his beard was yellowed from years of smoking. "Well, lookie lookie, boys," the man said in a gravelly voice. "It's the rat of the hour."

 

Jared glanced in the man's direction, but his eyes were hardened, the boyishness suddenly gone. "Fuck off, Chuck," he snarled.

 

Chuck removed the cigar from his mouth and feigned shock. "Is that how you talk to your old buddy?"

 

Immediately furious, Jared shoved away from the pool table and moved closer to Chuck. "We are _not_ buddies," he growled, pointing a finger in the man's face. "Get out. You're not supposed to be here."

 

"Hey, I'm a paying patron," Chuck said, reaching behind him. One of his lackeys gave him a mug of beer that he raised to Jared and then drank from. "So tell me, Rat," he continued. "How has your new life been treating you?"

 

"Great," Jared smiled. "Especially since the restraining order against you came through."

 

Once again, Chuck pretended to be hurt. He gave the mug of beer back to his friend, not taking his eyes off the young man before him. "Jared," he said, shaking his head. "We were brothers once. You, me, the gang..."

 

"Shut _up_ , Chuck," Jared almost yelled. "I told you I didn't ever want to see you again."

 

Chuck stood taller, nose-to-nose with Jared. "No, now see, Rat, that's where you're wrong," he growled. "It was me that told you that after you ratted us out to the fuzz."

 

"The _fuzz_?" Jared smirked. "The seventies called, they said they don't want your fat ugly ass either."

 

Chuck changed tactic then, grinning horribly. "Why don't you introduce us to your little girlfriend?" He smiled over at Jensen, winking and kissing at the air. "He's awful pretty, isn't he?"

 

Jensen swallowed nervously. He scanned the bar for any sign of Jeffrey, but the man hadn't arrived yet. He prayed that he wouldn't be much longer, as he feared how this confrontation was going to end.

 

Jaw clenched, Jared took a step back away from the crass biker. Without thinking, he tossed the pool cue in the air and grabbed hold of the tapered end. He swung the heavier, weighted end at Chuck's head, not even blinking at the blood that splattered across his face and shoulders. Jensen had ducked away instinctively, stepping back into someone. As Jared took another hit at Chuck, Jensen was grabbed by the collar of his jacket and spun around into a well-aimed fist. It caught him in the eye and he stumbled backwards, nearly falling onto the pool table. The guy went for him again and he dodged to the side, avoiding it narrowly, then darted forward between the crowd of people. Jared yelled out as he punched Chuck in the shoulder and the noise diverted people’s attentions long enough for Jensen to slip into the bathroom unseen. He doubted it was intentional, but he was glad all the same. Feeling an overwhelming mix of terrified and guilty, Jensen found the only stall with a working lock and secured himself inside it, sitting on the lid of the toilet with his feet pulled up off the floor and his arms around his knees.

 

His heart was pounding. He should go back out there, try and help Jared. See how he was faring, at least. Call Jeffrey. Anything. But he couldn’t move a muscle.


	8. Chapter seven

  
Author's notes: **Double chapter post today!!!**  
Bloody and Evil thank you for all the comments, both are reading, and seriously thank you for all the wonderful things that you've all said!!  
______________________________  
  


* * *

Jensen didn't know how much time had passed. He had listened to the fight, but was unaware of how long it had been quiet again. He thought that the silence had been sudden, thought that there had then been raised voices before everything went quiet again, but he honestly wasn't sure. He started as his phone rang from his trouser pocket, his heart in his throat as he recognised the ringtone. Dad. He quickly dug into his pocket and silenced it before it drew anyone else's attention. He was too late, though. He heard the door to the bathroom open and footsteps on the dirty tile. Someone kicked at his stall door and he whimpered, pulling himself as far back as he could go. 

 

"Jensen? Open the door."

 

He swallowed, licking his lips. "Jared?"

 

"Yeah. Come on, open up." 

 

Slowly, he pulled back the lock, but stayed where he was as the door was pushed open. Jeffrey stood beside Jared, looking in at him. 

 

"Hey, it's all right to come out, kiddo," he said, holding out his hand. Jensen took it, allowing himself to be pulled to his feet. Jeffrey drew him out and let him go, taking in his pale face and worried eyes. "First bar fight?"

 

" _Yes_."

 

"You'll toughen up."

 

Jensen stared at him. He didn't _want_ to toughen up! Then Jared cuffed his shoulder, grabbing his attention.

 

"Hey, thanks for sticking by me. You really are a pansy-assed mothe-" He was cut short as Jeffrey slapped the back of his head, gently.

 

"That's enough. He ain't used to it, you are. What the hell were you doing bringing him out here anyhow? You know Mickey's doesn't house nothing but trouble. You an idiot, boy?"

 

"Would it have _killed_ him to grow a set and help me fight?" Jared complained, rubbing the back of his head. Jensen noticed that his knuckles were raw and bloodied, that his face was spattered with blood and that his arms were marked dark with coming bruises.

 

"You know it might've, at that. And then where the hell would you be? You could have just walked away, Jared, but no. You always gotta have the last word. Throw the last punch."

 

"Chuck's a fucking asshole. He deserved everything he got."

 

"I agree, but you don't always have to be the one dishing it out to him. He's got plenty other enemies besides you. Now come on. Let's get you both home." He reached an arm around Jensen, pulling him close. Jared led them both out, still complaining under his breath. Jensen wished he had the balls to say something to him, but everything Jared was saying was true. And besides, he was too busy trying not to look at the carnage in the bar. 

 

Out back, Jared stopped and Jensen nearly walked into him. "That dick!"

 

"What?" Jeffrey asked.

 

"Look what he did to my fucking bike!"

 

Jensen looked over Jared's shoulder and drew in a sharp breath. The bike lay on its side. Jensen could see that they'd beaten the crap out of the machine and it was mangled and dented. He watched Jared drop to a crouch beside it, running his hands over the twisted metal. Heard him curse again.

 

"Jared, leave it. I'll bring the truck over from work tomorrow and pick it up then. But there's no way you're taking that back tonight."

 

Jensen retrieved his backpack from behind it, thankful they'd left it alone, and ignored Jared's pissed off remarks. He felt bad enough without hearing what the other man had to say. Jeffrey told them to go wait in his car, handing Jensen the keys, and they watched him drag the bike away from the building and towards a better sheltered area where nobody would notice it. He then joined them in the car, slipping behind the wheel without a word. Jared sat beside him and Jensen sat in the back, not wanting to break the silence. It was only as they neared town again that he knew he had to.

 

"Can..can you drop me off near home? Please?" He didn't look at Jared; knew the man was glaring at him again. Let him be mad, he thought. It wasn't anything compared to the reaction he was now going to receive from his father.

 

Jeffrey nodded, understanding, and pretty soon he was stopping the car a few yards down from Jensen's place and letting him out. Jensen leaned back into the car for just a moment before he closed the door and said, "I'm really sorry, Jared. I wish there hadn't been any trouble. I was enjoying myself."

 

"Yeah, well. You better go kiss up to your old man, before he grounds you for life."

 

"Will I see you again?"

 

"Kind of depends on you, not me."

 

Jensen nodded, stepping back and shutting the door so Jeffrey could pull away. "Good luck, kid," he said, just before he drove off.

 

Yeah, Jensen thought, miserably. _I'm gonna need it_.

 

 

 

 

As soon as Jensen was in the front door he could sense the heavy atmosphere. He noticed Kenzie standing in the doorway to the lounge, looking nervous and fearful, and knew his father had been ranting at her about Jensen's behaviour already. Josh would be out and his mother, he remembered, would be at a book club meeting with her friends. That meant no calming influences, no rational voices. Just his father yelling and his little sister cowering, too afraid to speak out. Kenzie pointed towards the door to the kitchen and then hurried past him and upstairs. He dropped his bag as he heard her bedroom door slam shut. The next thing he knew, Alan was there. His father grabbed at his wrist and dragged him into the kitchen, throwing him down into a chair.

 

"What the hell is this?" He demanded, indicating the leather jacket that Jensen still wore. Then his eyes went wide and Jensen could see the blood rushing to his face. " _Them_ ," he hissed, his voice filled with venom. "You were with that damned family, weren't you? I told you to stay away from them! Does my word mean nothing to you? You were grounded and you do this, why are you behaving like this son?" He paused, for a breath, and Jensen felt his throat dry out. His dad was so angry, he realized, that he wasn't able to keep to a single thought. They were running together as he spoke, his voice getting harsher with each word. "Jared Padalecki. I knew that name was familiar. He's a criminal, Jensen! Is that what you want? You want to become one of them?"

 

"No, sir."

 

His dad screamed the question again, right in his face, and something inside Jensen snapped at the look in his eyes.

 

"You know, maybe I decided to hang out with those criminals because they treat me more like part of the family than you ever did!" Even as he said it he was trying to swallow the words, take them back. But he couldn't stop and he knew his dad wouldn't just let such a remark go.

 

"And what on God's green earth is that supposed to mean? We've given you everything you needed. Always. You know the sacrifices we've made for you, you ungrateful little ass?"

 

"Oh god, yeah, just say it dad. Say what you've given up for me. Everything except the one goddamned thing I might want. The one thing I might be missing in my life. You ever stop and wonder why other guys think I'm such a tough person to be friends with? Why they'd rather just beat on me than try and start a conversation? 'Cause I don't know how to _have_ a conversation. I don't know how to make friends with those people!"

 

"You _have_ friends. At least Chris doesn't have a rap sheet!"

 

Jensen laughed, the sound bitter. "Oh, 'cause that's what this is all about, huh? Chris is friends with me out of pity. I figured that out long ago, but I never complained because I was just so grateful to have someone show me that little bit of affection. Jared? Jeffrey? They showed me that without a single hesitation. That's all I ever wanted out of this family and all I never got. So, y'know what? There's your stupid reason. That's the thing I'm apologizing for." His voice broke on the last words, but his father remained impassive. Jensen knew he wasn't even hearing him any more. 

 

Alan leaned in closer, his voice low. "You hate us so much then maybe you should just get out of this house."

 

Jensen gaped up at his father, unable to believe what he'd just heard. "What? Are you even listening to me?" 

 

"Oh yeah, I heard you. And now you hear this. You either stay here and abide by the rules I set down, because no matter how old you are you're still my son, and you show some damned respect, or you get out."

 

Jensen got up from his seat, shrugging off his father's hand as he tried to sit him back down. "I don't think I've ever felt less like your son." He pushed past him and made for the stairs, his feet heavy as he went up to his room. Alan followed. Jensen pulled a large holdall from his closet and started throwing clothes into it. His father grabbed at his arm, only to be shrugged off again.

 

"What do you think you're doing?"

 

"What the hell does it look like? You don't want me here, I'm gone."

 

"Really, and you go where? Knocking on the door of that worthless scum you think you're calling a friend? You're not an idiot, JR. Don't throw your life away!"

 

"I'm not throwing anything away. Maybe I'm grabbing at something before it passes me by." He paused for just a second, letting his words sink in for himself as much as his dad. It was an odd feeling, he thought, to come clean to yourself like that. He hadn't even realized it, but his words were completely true. This was a chance, he thought, and he had recognized it and wanted to take it. He zipped up the holdall and stared at his dad until he moved out of Jensen's way, following him as far as the doorway.

 

"If you leave now you don't come back. You know that, son? Make sure you know what you're doing."

 

Jensen turned to him from the top of the stairs. "I know exactly what I'm doing. See you around, dad."

 

 

 

 

He'd walked about seven blocks when it began raining. He had intended to walk all the way to the other side of town, hoping that using his energy for that would help get rid of some of his anger. So far it wasn't working. He kept replaying the conversation in his head and wondering how his dad got to caring so little about keeping his family together. Jensen knew he couldn't hate his own father, but he had realized that he didn't really like him very much either. It was much too difficult to. He wondered how the rest of the family truly felt about him; about the way he dealt with them.

 

As the bottoms of Jensen's pants got wetter, he decided there was no way he could walk all the way across town. He dug out his phone instead and rang the number of the cab company he used most often. He was told it would take ten minutes to get to him and he took shelter in the doorway of an unlit store. 

 

His dad had been right about one thing, at least. Jeffrey's house was precisely where he knew he would end up. Although after tonight, common sense told him that maybe Chris would be a wiser choice. Jared might still be mad at him for bailing, after all. There was a moment of indecision when his cab arrived five minutes late, but he blurted out the name of Jared and Jeffrey's road and then hauled his bag across the seat towards him, before he could change his mind. The rain stopped while they were en route and Jensen squinted out into the dark, trying to see more of the neighbourhood. There were lights on in Jeffrey's house, he saw, as the cab pulled up beside it. The garage door was open and Jared sat just inside it, on a striped deck-chair, out of the wet. He was pressing an icepack against his cheek, obviously still suffering.

 

Jensen paid the driver, thanked him, and grabbed his bag from the backseat, hearing the front door open as Jeffrey came out onto the porch. As Jensen neared the front of the garage, Jared took the icepack away and dropped it on the floor, exchanging it for an open beer he had there.

 

"Hey, asshole," he muttered.

 

Jensen stopped, standing there awkwardly with the straps of his bag pulled over one shoulder. "Hey. Still sore?"

 

"Fuck you. I still kicked Chuck's ass. Without you. What's the bag for? You going on a trip?"

 

Jeffrey, who'd just reached them both, clouted Jared again. 

 

"Ow, fuck man! People need to stop hitting me tonight already!"

 

"Stop being a jerk and talk nice to your friend," Jeffrey told him. 

 

"I _asked_ him what the bag was for. What's not nice about that?"

 

Jensen dropped his bag on the ground, quieting them both. "I got thrown out. Or left. I don't know which it ended up being."

 

"So you figured you'd come straight here?" Jared asked. He was obviously still annoyed.

 

" _Jay_." Jeffrey's voice carried a note of warning that Jensen thought he must get tired of using with Jared sometimes.

 

"A guy can ask a simple question. 'Sides, I'm betting ten to one he ends up sleeping in there with me." He pointed over his shoulder into the musty garage. "And I end up having to do the school run like some fucked up soccer mom."

 

Jeffrey stared down at him in disbelief. " _Jesus_ , you're an asshole. Jensen? You can stay in the house if you want."

 

"Wait, he gets to stay in the house and I have to sleep in your crappy garage?"

 

"You don't have to sleep in there. I can toss you out any time I want."

 

Jared waved a hand in Jensen's direction, scowling. "Jensen, you can share my garage. I know you'd rather be in there anyway."

 

Jensen watched them arguing, feeling more amused than anything. Their arguments seemed so good-natured and not at all serious, and it made a refreshing change. Eventually, Jeffrey just put up his hands and backed away from them both. 

 

"It's up to you, Jensen. I'll let you stay out here if you want. But you know you're always welcome if you want to use the spare room inside. If Jared's snoring gets too loud. If he starts being a grade-A dick to you. You just come on in and let me know."

 

Jensen laughed. "Thanks, Jeff. I will. I promise."

 

He left them both alone and Jared told Jensen to bring his shit inside so he could close up for the night. He dropped the holdall at one end of the couch as Jared pulled the door closed and dragged the deck-chair back against one wall. "Knew this'd happen," Jared said. "You just can't stay away, can you?"

 

"I'm not going to cause you any trouble again."

 

"Oh, you will. I know you will. But I'm good with trouble," Jared reminded him, grinning. The movement made his lip crack open and start bleeding again, but he didn't seem too bothered by it. He was otherwise clean. Jensen thought he must've showered when he'd got in and then had Jeffrey clean his wounds up. He looked better. Jensen wished he could do the same, but decided he could leave it until morning. He didn't feel like disturbing Jeffrey again tonight and, besides, he was suddenly feeling very weary. Jared had noticed, too, as he pointed upwards. "Bedtime, huh?"

 

"God, yes. Please."

 

 

 

Ten minutes later they were stretched out side by side in Jared's bed. Jensen in his boxers and a teeshirt, Jared in tight shorts that Jensen was trying desperately not to think about. He wasn't as tense as that first night, at least, but he knew it might take him a while to relax enough for sleep. Especially as Jared seemed to want to talk.

 

"So, you know earlier?"

 

"Yeah, I know. I'm a wimp. You'd think I'd be used to it with everything, but...I guess not."

 

"Still. Don't ever ditch me like that again. I mean it."

 

"I'd just got punched in the face! I'm sorry!"

 

"Yeah, and I was fighting off a room full of huge and nasty bikers. Let's play a game called who was worse off, huh? I win. End of."

 

"All right, I'm sorry. Jeez. If I could turn back time I'd have stayed and got my face kicked in alongside you. That what you want to hear?"

 

"Close enough." Jared was silent for a moment, then chuckled. "You need to stop rising to the bait so much. I don't hate you for it, all right? I'd rather you were safe and out of trouble than slowing me down. It was easier to fight when I knew I didn't have to watch out for you, too. Jeffrey would have kicked my ass harder than every guy in that bar put together if I'd let you get hurt. Please, though, for my sake and yours. Learn to fight for next time."

 

"What makes you so sure there'll even _be_ a next time?"

 

"If you're going to stick around then I'm pretty damned sure there will be. But if you cheese it one more time, I will fucking rip you a new one."

 

Jensen rolled onto his side to stare at Jared. "What's that supposed to mean? If I stick around you'll be in another brawl? Man, you seem to get into them without my help."

 

"Nah, it's definitely you. They're all jealous I got such pretty company."

 

Jensen bit his lip and fell quiet, looking away. _Pretty_? Jared didn't really think that, right? That was just one of those stupid, throwaway comments that he kept making, the ones that made Jensen hope, stupidly, that maybe he felt something in return. He glanced over at him and wished he hadn't. Jared was watching him, as if waiting to hear what he was thinking about. He wasn't thinking about anything at all, as he leaned over quickly and kissed Jared square on the mouth. He pulled back after less than a second and turned away, feeling like he might throw up from nerves. He couldn't hear Jared breathing.

 

"What...what the fuck was that?"

 

Jensen licked his lips, shut his eyes. "Awkward? I'm going to say awkward. And good night."

 

"You just-"

 

"Just ignore me. Really."

 

"You _kissed_ me!"

 

Jensen whispered to him to shut up, pulling the covers tighter over himself. 

 

"Don't tell me to shut up when you just kissed me. Jensen-"

 

"Leave it. I'm sorry. Really."

 

To his surprise, Jared said nothing more. But he could feel his stare against the back of his head and wished in that moment that he had stayed at home instead. He was such a fucking idiot. He didn't think he would make it to sleep, but he heard Jared start snoring a short while later and, eventually, he too drifted off.


	9. Chapter eight

  
Author's notes: **Double post!!!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

Jensen dreamt about Jared fucking him. He dreamt that Jared found out he was a virgin and decided that he had to get laid before graduation and they kept trying and failing, but Jensen was all for it. Then Jensen graduated and Jared picked him up right off the stage, on his bike, and they rode all the way to New York. Although because it was a dream, the ride only took a few minutes. And then eventually Jared got him to the top of the Empire State Building - somewhere Jensen had never actually been - and fucked him right there in front of everyone. 

 

Jensen woke up with a hard-on, laid flat on his back, but quickly discovered that this wasn't his only problem. Jared was pressed against his side, just like that first time he'd stayed in the other man's bed, and one arm was draped loosely over Jensen's waist. Heart pounding, he turned slightly. Tried to get onto his side so Jared would be forced to move away and then maybe he could get up without his problem being noticed. But Jared just complained at him, his grip tightening, and the next thing he knew the other man was leaning across him, hand pressed against the mattress the other side of him to support his weight. He uttered a single word in surprise as Jared's mouth fell against his and he kissed him; slow, soft and sure. Jared was half asleep; he could tell from the way his tongue moved, from the way he was breathing. But the kiss wasn't clumsy, or half-assed. It was just right and Jensen couldn't help but respond to it.

 

Just like that, it was over. Jared pulled away and moved back to his side of the bed, folding his arms underneath his head and watching the ceiling.

 

"You awake?" Jensen asked, after a few minutes of silence.

 

There was a soft groan. "What d'you think?" Jared replied, turning his head to look at him.

 

"Well, you know how you freaked when I kissed you last night?"

 

"Sure."

 

"I'm kind of freaking out myself right now."

 

"Really? 'Cause it seemed like you didn't think it was that big a deal. Like maybe guys like me kissed you all the time."

 

Jensen was about to protest, until he realized that Jared was playing him yet again. "You're a dick. Maybe I should take Jeff up on his offer-" He was cut off as Jared quickly turned and grabbed his arm.

 

"Oh no, you're definitely staying here with me after this."

 

"After what?"

 

Jared watched him for a long moment, eyes searching his, then leaned over and kissed him again. Jensen let himself get lost in the feel of Jared's mouth on his, closing his eyes and listening to the sounds of it. "Should've told me you were into guys," Jared said, sitting back.

 

"It didn't really..come up."

 

"It's come up _now_."

 

"Won't this make things awkward?" Jensen asked, already worrying that they had moved too fast. Or he had, anyway. He had no doubts that Jared was no stranger to one-night stands.

 

"Nah," Jared assured him. "And if it ever does, we'll figure something out. I reckon you should probably get out of my bed now, though." He grinned wickedly at the look Jensen gave him. "Time for school."

 

"Oh. Right."

 

"Gotta work on your confidence, Jen. I'd never throw you out of bed for no reason, believe me."

 

At that, Jensen felt blood rush to his face. Jared seemed to have a knack for embarrassing the hell out of him without even trying. He really was too easy and Jared was right. He definitely had to work on that. He asked if Jeffrey would mind him using the bathroom and Jared told him the bathroom was theirs, so long as they weren't in there before seven-thirty. Jeffrey always took his shower at seven in the morning and if anybody was in there when he wanted it, he'd give them hell. Jensen had ten minutes, so he went down to the lower floor of the garage and started looking through his stuff for his clean uniform. He shoved the books he would need to one side, wishing he'd thought to pick up his school bag, and then grabbed his clothes up and headed into the house. He could hear Jared snoring again and laughed softly to himself. That guy really wasn't a morning person.

 

Jeffrey was out of the shower, dressed, and in the kitchen already when Jensen went through. He looked up, nodded at Jensen, and went back to measuring out coffee into the pot. "I'll give you a ride to school," he said, as Jensen made for the stairs.

 

 

 

 

After a shower and a quick breakfast, Jensen gathered up his stack of books for the day and went outside to where Jeffrey was waiting in the car, the engine idling. He sat in the passenger seat and pulled his seatbelt on, holding the books on his lap.

 

"You need a bag for those?"

 

"It's okay. I can manage. I'll just leave what I don't need in my locker."

 

"There's a bag in the backseat. You may as well use it. Just throw anything in there onto the seat."

 

Jensen didn't want to argue. He felt awkward enough as it was. So he twisted around in his seat and found the bag, pulling it forward. There were a couple of ring binders in it which he pulled out and placed carefully on the floor by his feet. Then he stuffed his books and papers into it and snapped the fastener shut. "Thanks for this."

 

"No problem. I'm guessing somehow we'll have to get you home so you can grab some more stuff."

 

"While Dad's not there," Jensen agreed. 

 

"He really threw you out?"

 

"He told me I had to live by his rules and never see you or Jared again, or I could just leave. So...Well, you know which one I chose."

 

Jeffrey was quiet for a few moments, chewing on his bottom lip, and the silence was slightly uncomfortable. "Any particular reason you decided you couldn't go without seeing us?" He asked, eventually.

 

Jensen could only shrug. He knew the reason, but he didn't think he wanted to tell Jeffrey about it yet. He'd probably guess before Jensen got the nerve to tell him that he was sort of slightly infatuated with Jared. That or Jared would tell him first.

 

"What does your Mom think about all this? Was she there?"

 

"No, it was just Dad. And Kenzie. She just hid in her room. He'll probably give Mom some story or other, but he won't let her argue with him, I know that." Jensen grimaced. "When his mind's made up, that's it." He swallowed down the lump in his throat that had risen up while he talked about it. "He won't let any of them..." He trailed off, gulping again, blinking quickly to stop from embarrassing himself. Jeffrey let go of the gear-stick for just a minute and patted his knee, the touch reassuring.

 

"He'll back down, I'm sure. But at best he can't stop you seeing your brother and sister, right?"

 

"Who knows what he's capable of?" Jensen muttered and turned to stare out of the window for the rest of the journey.

 

It took another ten minutes to get to Jensen's school and Jeffrey pulled up a little way from the gates, watching the other students heading in. "Are you going to be okay?" He asked, as Jensen opened his door. "Explaining away that black eye, I mean."

 

"My teachers are sort of used to me turning up with bruises. They think I take Karate lessons after school. That's what I had to tell them after the first..." He trailed off, thinking maybe he'd said too much. But this was Jeffrey and he trusted him already. It didn't matter if he knew. "The guy that beat me up that first night. He goes to this school too. In the same year as me, on the football team. If I tell anyone it was him, they wouldn't believe me. He's too popular, has too many friends. I have one friend and that's it. So I had to make something up."

 

"Right." There was a pause and Jensen waited, sensing that Jeffrey wasn't done. "Listen, if that kid or whoever it is bothers you again today, you need to tell someone. Tell me. He's not going to get away with hurting you again, got it?"

 

Jensen glanced down, then back up at Jeffrey with a forced smile. "Got it. Thanks."

 

"All right. Have a good day. I'll get Jay to fetch you later. I'll be busy picking his bike up. Since it got wrecked, he'll be using mine. You'll know it when you see it."

 

"Okay. Thanks for everything." Jensen shut the door, needing to get away and into school. He had to get things straight in his head now, because the morning so far had been making him dizzy. Such a change to routine, a change to everything. He had to tell the school secretary that he no longer needed to use the bus, somehow avoiding the issue of his leaving home. He had to find Chris and tell him what had happened last night. He also had to see the coach for the swim team and check on his timings for tomorrow, because he'd left a bunch of his calendar stuff back at home. Then he had to come to terms with the fact that he had a huge and terrible crush on an older guy who had a criminal record, and that said guy seemed to return the attentions. Today was going to be a busy one.

 

 

 

 

Jeffrey got a short way away from the school when something poking out from under the passenger seat caught his eye. He pulled over and leaned down, grabbing the edge of the paper and pulling it out. He swore to himself when he realised what it was - Jensen's agenda. Something Jeffrey was pretty sure he'd need for the rest of the day. He had a half hour before his day was due to start, but, screw it. He was the boss. He could roll in a little late if needs be. He checked for traffic then turned the car around, heading back to the school. 

 

The campus grounds looked pretty empty when he parked up outside the gates, and he realised that Jensen would be in class already. Having no idea where that class might be or what it was, Jeffrey locked his car up and made his way to the reception office. He was just explaining to the secretary there that his son's friend had left something behind the previous night, when the doors at the end of the hallway slammed open. Both he and the secretary looked up as a young woman came hurrying towards them, struggling to keep hold of a huge stack of files and papers. As she got close to them, hardly acknowledging that they were there, her foot caught on something and she yelped as she started to fall forward.

 

Jeffrey instinctively reached out, catching her before she fell, and then leapt back as if his hand had been burnt as he realised exactly where it had ended up. Papers were falling to the floor and he stood there blushing, apologising for his accidental grope.

 

She smiled brightly at him. "It's okay! I just dropped my English class's essays everywhere, but at least the day is looking up."

 

Jeffrey stared at her, then broke into a grin. He held out his hand. "I'm Jeffrey Dean. Kind of feel like I should be introducing myself now I've felt you up."

 

She took his hand and laughed as she shook it. "Stevie. My...Dad was a Stevie Nicks fan. I always feel like I have to explain that." She let go and then crouched down, gathering up the bits of paper. Jeffrey knelt down beside her to help and together they got them into a reasonably neat pile. "So, what're you doing here Jeffrey Dean?" Stevie asked, as they both got to their feet again.

 

"Dropping something off for my boy's friend. Ackles?"

 

"Oh, Jensen? I have him for English this afternoon. Bright kid. So far, anyway. I've only been here a few weeks, but you tend to notice the ones who're going to stand out."

 

"That's good to hear." Stevie was starting to carry on her way and Jeffrey followed, opening the next set of doors for her.

 

"Thank you," she told him, stopping next to a door with 'English Dept.' stencilled on the glass. "This is me. It was nice meeting you, Jeffrey."

 

"Nice meeting you too, miss." He thought fast and blurted out his next question just as Stevie was pushing open the door. "I'd like to take you out to dinner sometime. If you'd..If you'd like?"

 

Stevie let the door fall shut again and turned to him, smiling up at him. "Yes. I would like. Though I think you're meant to do that before you check out the merchandise."

 

Jeffrey chuckled, ducked his head. "I am sorry about that. I'll make it up to you. Take you somewhere nice."

 

"You'd better. Do you have a pen?"

 

Jeffrey dug one out of his jacket pocket and Stevie gave him her number, told him to call her at lunch when she'd be out of classes and they could arrange something. She thanked him again for his help and then went into her class, leaving him grinning to himself in the corridor like an idiot.

 

 

 

 

"What the hell happened to your face?"

 

Jensen looked up as Chris sat opposite him. He'd already endured the remarks from Doug in class, knowing he was curious that someone else had clearly taken to beating on his victim. He hadn't bothered even looking at him, or trying to say something. Now Chris wanted to know and he needed to come clean.

 

"I got into a fight. In a bar."

 

"A..wait, what?"

 

"Jared took me to this place out of town. Biker central. We got into a fight. That's all."

 

"Proves he's trouble."

 

"He's trouble I've got to get used to." Jensen set about telling Chris all about the fight with his dad, the leaving home. The waking up to the realization that Jared was into him as much as he was into Jared. 

 

"You're really sure about this, huh?"

 

"I am. Don't have much choice now. I guess Dad'd have me home if I never saw them again, but I can't do it."

 

"You want anything picking up?" At Jensen's puzzled look, Chris explained that he could ask Josh or Mackenzie to grab together any of Jensen's stuff and take him over in his truck while his dad wasn't there so he could pick it up. 

 

"Thanks, man. That'd be great. Sunday night? Dad'll be out with mom at my grandparents' house. They always go there on Sunday evening. Kenzie and Josh should be home."

 

"Perfect. We can go over and you can grab as much as you want."

 

 

 

 

Relieved at Chris's suggestion, the rest of the day passed a bit easier for Jensen. He tucked everything he needed for the weekend into the bag Jeffrey had given him at the end of the afternoon and told Chris he would call him over the weekend.

 

"You can tell me tomorrow night. My girl's cheerleading for the game, remember? You have to come and keep me company. And bring Jared. I want to meet him. Properly."

 

"I will. I'll meet you there, all right?"

 

Chris nodded, clapped a hand to his shoulder. "Have a good night."

 

Once he'd finished packing up, Jensen headed out to the gates. Jeffrey had told him he'd know when Jared was there, which was redundant as far as Jensen was concerned, since nobody else at school rode a motorbike that he knew about. So when he heard the powerful sound of a bike that was definitely more of a classic than Jared's Suicycle, he knew who it was. He felt almost honoured to have the chance to ride on the back of a second gorgeous bike, and this one a well-looked after black Harley. Jared was a lot more careful this time around. As he'd explained to Jensen before he got on the bike, Jeffrey had told him, "Look after her. One scratch and you know what happens." Jared had jokingly said that Jeffrey would cut him open and sell his kidneys, but told Jensen that Jeffrey hadn't laughed along with him.

 

"He must love this bike," Jensen said, pulling his helmet firmly onto his head.

 

"He's had her as long as I can remember. She's as much a part of the family as I am."

 

Jensen soon realized that they weren't going straight home. He didn't have a chance to ask Jared where he was taking him, since the noise of the bike was too loud to shout over and be heard. He didn't recognize the part of town Jared was taking them through, either. When he pulled to a stop in front of a dingy looking building painted in faded red, Jensen had to wonder what the hell he was in store for now. Another biker bar or hangout? More people Jared might have fallen foul of? He tugged his helmet off and tucked it under one arm, standing back as Jared swung his legs off the bike. There was another Harley parked up further along, as well as an old Dodge. Jensen eyed them, thinking at least if these were the only other vehicles then at least there couldn't be many people inside.

 

"What're you looking so worried for?" Jared asked.

 

Jensen met his eyes, annoyed at himself for showing how afraid he still was of Jared's life. "I don't know where we are."

 

"Relax. This is Eric's place. Remember? The guy from Sunday? I told him I'd stop by tonight and he's going to do some work on my sleeve. No point in going right home, anyway. Jeff's still at work and Friday night is kind of family night. As in, after work he gets takeout and we watch crappy TV until he falls asleep."

 

Jensen thought back to the Friday before, when Jared had been on his own in the garage, Jeff already asleep in the house, and he'd invited Jensen to join him watching reruns of Cops. He'd already been welcomed in, he realized with a warm feeling. 

 

"We should be here about an hour. Maybe you can check out his designs yourself. See if there's anything you want." It was said with a mischievious smile, but Jensen was pretty sure Jared actually meant it, too.

 

 

 

 

Eric's place was much cleaner inside than Jensen was expecting, given the exterior of the building. He supposed it had to be, though. He figured these places probably had health inspections just the same as any other business. An old stereo in the corner was pumping out some metal music that he didn't really recognise and there were sheets of tattoo designs and photos of tattoos tacked all over the walls. There was a sweet smell to the air too, that made him feel slightly light-headed. He sat down on a battered leather sofa opposite the couch where Jared was already seated and pulling off his shirt, and accepted the beer that was immediately shoved at him by Eric. There was one other person there; younger than Eric and sat in the corner of the room bent over a desk, drawing on a large sheet of paper. Jensen figured he must work here, coming up with the designs that covered every available surface. 

 

He tried to ignore Jared at first, because he knew if he stared at him too long things could get uncomfortable and hot and...Obvious. But the noise of the needle was hard to block out for long and he found himself drawn across the room, standing by Eric and watching over his shoulder as he worked on Jared's arm. He'd never seen anything like it before and was fascinated by it straight away. Eric didn't seem put off by it at all and after a short while he even invited Jensen to pull up a chair so he could be comfortable while he watched. 

 

He had to admit, comfort didn't really come into it after a while. His eyes were continuously drawn by the lines of other tattoos to Jared's chest and he'd watch the nipple rings rising and falling with each breath Jared took. Then he'd force his eyes away and back to the tattooing and that would just be a mistake. Sharing in this was odd. Jensen realized it was a pretty personal thing for Jared and it seemed either intrusive or just plain intimate for him to be there watching the tattooing being done. He shifted in his chair, hoping he could stay calm.

 

"Does it hurt?" His voice faltered as he asked Jared, seeing Eric swipe a cloth across his skin to wipe away the dots of blood that were springing up. 

 

"Not really," Jared answered. "But I'm kinda used to it anyway."

 

"I guess." Jensen tried to make out what the design would be, but he couldn't really tell with Eric's hand in the way. He didn't have a clue until about half an hour in when Eric wiped Jared's arm clean and told him they'd take a break for a few minutes so he could grab a cigarette. Then he took a closer look at the lines and colors and saw that Eric had been adding in cloud-like waves and lotus flowers in brilliant blues and reds. "Wow," he said, looking up to find Jared watching him with a sly smile. Jared's other hand came up then and he wound Jensen's tie around his fingers, pulling him closer. He kissed him, barely a touch, and then let him go.

 

"This is turning you on, huh?"

 

Jensen nodded, not quite looking straight at Jared.

 

"It does me, too. Fuck, I so wish.." He stopped, glancing over at the room's other occupant. The other man was no longer bent over his sketch, but was instead watching them with an expression of interest. "Hey, you not got something else you should be doing?" Jared asked, loudly. 

 

"Loudmouth little fuckhead," came the grumbled response, but the guy did turn back to his drawing. Still, the intimate mood had been broken for Jensen and he knew he wouldn't find out what Jared wished. He sat back and pretended to be admiring the photos behind Jared's head until Eric returned.

 

 

 

 

Jensen had plenty of questions he wanted to ask when they got out of Eric's place, but he also just wanted to get back to Jeffrey's house. Jared took it slowly, his bandaged arm slightly stiff from holding still for so long. They got back just as Jeff's car was pulling into the drive. He said hi to them both, told them to come in the house and find a menu for takeout so they could decide what they wanted and he'd order after he'd taken a shower. 

 

"That was weird," Jared said, as Jensen followed him into the kitchen. He started going through the stack of menus next to the microwave. 

 

"What was?"

 

"Jeff. Something's up."

 

Jensen just shrugged; he hadn't really noticed anything different at all. But then, Jared knew the older man far better than he did. "Maybe he just had a crappy day at work."

 

"Nah. It wasn't something bad." Jared held two menus out and grinned, obviously ready to change the subject. "You want chinese food or pizza?"

 

 

 

 

By half past eleven Jeffrey was already asleep and snoring on the couch. Jared locked the house up for him and he and Jensen crept out to the garage, careful not to wake him. They readied themselves for bed, Jensen having to settle for the shorts he was wearing and one of Jared's teeshirts to sleep in. 

 

"You gotta be sweating your socks off in that get-up," Jared told him, sliding beneath the covers and shimmying out of his underwear once he was under them. Jensen simply reddened and got into bed beside him, not lifting the sheets too high. "You can look if you want," Jared said, sounding amused.

 

"I'm good," Jensen answered, voice a little higher than normal.

 

"You know you're more embarrassed about this than I am, right?"

 

"Yeah, I know. I just-" He was interrupted then by the sound of his cellphone ringing. "Damn."

 

"Saved by the bell."

 

Jensen leaned out of bed and dragged his pants over, grabbing the phone from one pocket and checking the caller ID. "It's my brother."

 

"Answer it," Jared mumbled, turning onto his side. "Tell him normal people are trying to sleep."

 

Jensen ignored him, turning away as he answered the call. "Hey, Josh."

 

"So, where are you?" His brother asked.

 

"Dad told me to go."

 

"Right, that's not how he tells it. Said you yelled at him and then left."

 

Jensen snorted. "Of course. Yeah, sure, I yelled at him. He was being an ass. He told me I couldn't see my friends and if I was going to keep disobeying him and not showing him any respect then I may as well leave. So I did."

 

"And you didn't stop to think about the rest of your family?"

 

Rubbing his hand over his face, Jensen sighed. "It's not like I don't still love you guys. Hell, I still love Dad, I guess. But I can't live with that man any more. I'm sorry."

 

"Kenzie's scared as hell about all this. Mom hasn't spoken to Dad since he finally admitted to her this morning that you'd gone."

 

"You know what Mom's like. She'll forgive him soon enough."

 

"She's worried about you. She isn't the only one. Dad told us we're not supposed to talk to you, or try and find you. He just told us you were with friends. Said it like...I don't know.."

 

"Like he thinks my friends are pieces of shit not worth his time? Josh, the man has no idea. Aren't you sick of the way he looks down on everyone? Like he thinks he's this goddamned king of the world or something, and nobody can possibly be as wealthy or as great as he is. His job's made him judge everyone, see everything in black and white. Something's either wrong or it's right and why the hell should he get to decide which is which? I already feel more at home here than I ever did in his house. And, Josh, that's nothing to do with you, or Kenzie, or even Mom. It's just him."

 

There was a long silence and Jensen worried that his brother had gone for a moment, then he heard him sigh loudly. "I know. I know he's crappy at being a father, and he's crappy at being a husband too. Just..we're all worried. Not knowing what you're doing now, y'know?"

 

"I'm not going out and robbing a 7-11 every night, I promise."

 

"Oh, right. Not _every_ night."

 

"Yeah, just Tuesdays," Jensen joked, glad when Josh chuckled. "Seriously, I'm okay here. I just..I'm nineteen years old. I want the chance to grow up and behave like it."

 

"I know. Just promise me something else, okay? Check in with us now and then. You don't have to speak to Dad if you don't want, but, let the rest of us know how it's going. Especially Mom."

 

"I will, Josh. Hey, give my love to her and Kenzie, all right?"

 

"Sure. Shit, I gotta go. Dad's coming up. Take care, little bro."

 

"You too." Jensen started to say something else, but Josh cut him off as he hung up quickly. He closed his phone and laid it out on the floor beside the bed, and froze as he felt Jared shift and press against his back. He'd almost forgotten the other man was beside him. Almost forgotten how naked he was, too. Jared kissed his shoulder, asked him if things were okay. "Yeah. We're good. Can you-"

 

"Relax. I'm not going to try anything. Not tonight, at least."


	10. Chapter nine

It was Bachman-Turner Overdrive that woke him up, halfway through a song when the alarm finally kicked in. It took Jensen a full twenty seconds or so to pull himself out of sleep. Taking a deep breath, he rolled over and hit the snooze button on top of the alarm clock. The song cut out and would be silent for another nine minutes.

 

His thoughts were still fuzzy, his head clouded with sleep. Still, he blinked his heavy eyes and stared over at Jared, whose nose was pressed against the pillow, all soft breathing and gentle snores. He wanted to wake him up and ask Jared if he would come to the swim meet. But he felt like a love-sick teenage girl, begging her jock boyfriend to show up to her cheer practice. Frowning, he reached down to Jared's arm as it lay draped over Jensen's stomach. The bandage was still wrapped around Jared's arm, but there was not a hint of blood. Jensen had thought for sure, the way the tattoo had bled while it was being done, that there would be at least a drop or two still there.

 

"You have seven more minutes."

 

Jensen looked across at Jared. The words had been muffled, spoken against the pillow at his head. "What?"

 

"You have seven minutes," Jared said again. "Just stay here a little longer."

 

"I have practice," he told him.

 

"I know," he almost snapped. "But shut up for seven more minutes."

 

He tried to suppress his smile, but failed. Settling down again, he watched Jared sleep for those seven minutes. Their combined body heat started to lull Jensen back to sleep, so when the radio alarm went off again, his eyes popped open, startled by the sudden jolting sound of music. This time he sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and setting his feet upon the floor. Jared moved behind him, turning onto his side and hugging his pillow.

 

Jensen turned and leaned down on an elbow, resting his chin at Jared's shoulder. "You going to get up?"

 

"Mm, why?"

 

"Come on," he smiled. "Come to practice with me. Please?"

 

WIth his back towards Jensen, Jared squeezed his eyes shut and wriggled further under the covers. "Too fucking early," he grumbled.

 

Jensen frowned again, gazing down at him. He gave in and got up from bed, gathering up some clothes and heading into the house. Jeffrey was up, standing beside the kitchen sink and eating a piece of toast. Beside him was the morning newspaper and a half-full glass of orange juice.

 

"Hey, kiddo," he said, talking around the toast in his mouth and dusting the crumbs off of his fingers.

 

"Morning," Jensen greeted, his voice still thick with sleep.

 

"You're up early."

 

"I have swim practice later," he explained.

 

"On a Saturday?"

 

"Yeah. Not normally. Coach got mad at us last practice, so we have to make up for being slack."

 

Jeffrey motioned upstairs. "Get up there and do your thing," he said. "I can be a little late for work this morning. I'll drop you off."

 

Jensen smiled sheepishly and nodded, scratching at his head. "Okay," he agreed with a yawn.

 

After he was finally ready, Jensen took one last look up at the bed on the second floor of the garage. All he could really see was Jared's foot and his right arm, where the blankets had rumpled up and exposed his skin. He couldn't hear the man's snoring, but Jensen knew it was there all the same.

 

The ride over to school was quiet for the most part, but Jensen didn't mind this kind of quiet. Between him and Jared and Jeffrey, the silence was not strained. He never had to search for something to talk about, whereas at home he was always afraid of what the silence could lead to between him and Alan.

 

"He might show up, you know," Jeffrey spoke, breaking the comfortable stillness.

 

Jensen looked over at him. "It's okay," he said.

 

"Jared's just not a morning person," he continued. "But don't sell him too short. He knows what's important to you. And you're already important to him, so he may yet show up."

 

Jensen smiled and nodded. He wasn't sure he really believed Jeffrey. They'd not been friends that long, he thought, that he would really make a difference to Jared. At least not much. "Okay."

 

It was silent for a moment more, Jeffrey glancing out of the driver's side window as he parked up. "Of course, he could be a total asshole too, and sleep through the whole thing," he reminded the young man.

 

"I know."

 

"If I could, kiddo, _I'd_ stay," he offered. "But I have a huge-ass deadline that'll come down on my head if I don't manage what time the company has left to wrap up this job."

 

"It's okay, Jeff," he grinned. "Really."

 

"But we still got the game, right?"

 

Jensen nodded. "Yeah, if you want," he agreed. "Tonight at six."

 

Jeffrey returned the nod. "Six o'clock then."

 

But as Jensen got out of the car and stood, watching Jeffrey drive off, he realized that it wasn't okay. He wanted someone there to watch him at the pool. He couldn't remember ever having anyone come to a meet for him, which sounded incredibly dramatic when he thought about it. But honestly, Josh'd had his own team stuff to deal with (and now he was taking college courses); Kenzie couldn't have cared less; Dad was always busy; and Mom always had some sort of functions to go to, or lessons at the Club.

 

His thoughts turned to Chris - he had shown up for a meet or two at least.

 

Sighing, Jensen made his way into the school. The smell of the pool was unmistakable. He loved the smell - it seemed clean and yet humid and heavy. He changed in the locker room, smiling and laughing with his teammates. Jared had told him the previous night, just before they fell asleep, that Jensen was selling himself short; more people liked him than he gave them credit for. As he and the other swimmers got ready for the practice, Jensen wondered if he could call any of them friends. He was pretty sure some of them liked Josh when he'd gone to school there, and everyone knew his Dad. He was also pretty darn sure that not one of them would stand up for him in a fight, or try to protect him like Jared had.

 

He wasn't popular and never had been. He'd decided right there, however, that he was a man of few words and fewer friends. Chris and Jared. And Jeffrey. The end.

 

The loudest part during practice was the splashing of water and the encouraging shouts from teammate to teammate. The onlookers, the few that there were, never really got as excited about swimming as they did football. They were scattered throughout the stands. Some ignored the practice, merely waiting for their sons to be done with the interruption of a Saturday. Others were clapping politely when a diver came up for air, or a swimmer finished his lap. Some of them cheered, of course. Jensen just had this underlying feeling that none of them really thought of this as a very manly sport, regardless of the fact that a key player from the football team was also on the swim team.

 

After finishing his last relay, Jensen grabbed the edge of the pool and turned to look at his time. He pushed his goggles up to his forehead and waited impatiently. He was fast enough to beat some, but slow enough to only have come in fourth. Frowning, he sighed and inwardly scolded himself. Stupid, stupid! he thought. Of course you lost. You always do. Closing his eyes, he reached up and ripped the swim cap from his head, dunking his head under the water. He spat some of the water from his mouth when he surfaced again, still grumbling inwardly.

 

Interrupting his thoughts, two of his teammates reached down to him, offering their hands. He took them, mumbling a thank-you to their encouragements of a job well-done. He didn't agree with them, however. He shook the water out of his ear and, as he did, his gaze fell to the stands. Straightening, he took a second look.

 

Jared was in the stands, wearing torn jeans and a clean but worn Harley Davidson teeshirt, his hair hidden underneath a Dixieland skull cap. One leg was raised, his biker-boot-clad foot propped up on the seat in front of him. He was lounged back, stretching out comfortably, his leather jacket resting beside him on the bench.

 

Sniffling against the chlorinated water that had managed to get up his nose, Jensen neared him. He felt suddenly self-conscious and curled his arms around his waist as he walked.

 

Jared saw him walking closer and smiled. "Hi," he greeted, as soon as Jensen got close enough.

 

Practice was over and people were milling about, leaving the warm pool room to instead wait outside for their sons. Jensen took a quick look around before he leaned up against the dividing wall between the bleachers and the tile floor. "Hey," he said back. "You came."

 

Grinning, Jared sat up, setting both feet on the floor. "Don't say that too loud," he returned, winking.

 

Jensen could feel his face turning red, the hot flash making his ears burn. "I mean I just didn't expect you to, is all," he said.

 

Jared got up from his seat and crawled over the dividing wall, his leather jacket in tow. Long legs dangling down to the bench where the swimmers sat, Jared smiled at him. "And miss you in trunks?" he teased. "Are you crazy?"

 

Jensen hooked his thumbs into the waist and tugged gently. "More like Speedos."

 

Jared nodded. "More like, better."

 

Laughing, Jensen scratched the back of his own neck, looking down at his feet for a second or two. He felt the heat returning to his ears again and knew his face was probably horribly beet red.

 

"So can you jet now?"

 

Looking back up, Jensen nodded. "Oh, yeah," he agreed. "I just have to change."

 

Jared jumped down from the wall, leaving his jacket draped over the ledge. "Then go get changed," he advised. "I've got plans for you for the afternoon."

 

Jensen didn't know why, but he felt panic grip at his throat when Jared's words sank in. "P...plans?" he repeated. "What kind of plans?"

 

"Me to know, you to not," he smirked.

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head at him, his momentary panic gone. "You're such a jerk."

 

Jared chuckled with him before crooking his finger at him. Jensen barely moved though, Jared instead being the one to close the distance between them, regardless of his gesture. Leaning down the few inches to Jensen's ear, he spoke softly.

 

"You look fucking sexy in that," he told him. "And it's pretty much taking everything I got not to follow you into that locker room."

 

As Jared backed away, Jensen tried to swallow past the sudden lump in his throat that he thought just might be his heart. He knew Jared was teasing. He had to be. But that didn't mean that his legs shook any less as he walked to the changing room. And it didn't stop him from glancing back at Jared just before he went in.

 

Jared chuckled as he watched Jensen, shaking his head. The guy was way too easy to make blush. And it was fun.

 

Either he lost track of time, or Jensen changed the fastest of anyone else in the history of Man. His hair was still wet, but at least combed through, and his collar was damp. Patches along his button-down shirt were wet, but nothing that wouldn't dry while on a ride on the bike. He carried his backpack with him, slung over one shoulder. "So did you win?" Jared asked. "I can't tell."

 

"Nah," Jensen smiled. "If I'd known you were here though, I might've tried a bit harder."

 

"No good there," he said, his eyes glittering with more than a touch of mischief. "Then you'd be tired out for later."

 

Jensen's smile faded and he swallowed again. He didn't know what was in store for later, and he wasn't sure he wanted to know. Not yet anyway.

 

"Goddamn, you're fun," Jared laughed, slinging one arm around Jensen's neck and pulling him along with him. They headed out of the building and down to the parking lot where Jeffrey's Harley awaited them.

 

 

 

 

The wind was cold. Of course, it usually was in November, but lately the southern half of the US had been having unseasonably warm days. Today was a reminder that cooler weather was still coming. Since finding his way to Jared and Jeffrey's, Jensen had been fully outfitted with motorcycle gear. He had an old leather jacket of Jeffrey's, brown and soft, and black leather gloves that Jared had gotten two Christmases ago and never used.

 

With the gear on, the wind wasn't as biting as it could have been. And the sun was still warm on their backs. They drove along the freeway for a decent measure before turning off on an exit that looked rarely used. The pavement was cracked and broken in places, the yellow lines almost worn completely off. Trees lined either side of the tarmac, and the shade smelled cool and fresh. Finally, they came to a little brick bridge that looked like perhaps it had been standing there for hundreds of years. Jared pulled the bike over and parked beside a boulder that served as a rough guard rail.

 

Now, they stood beside the motorcycle, removing their helmets and breathing in deep the clean, fresh air.

 

"What are we doing here?" Jensen asked.

 

Jared only smiled. "You'll see." He dug into the saddlebags on the bike, pulling out a roll of what looked like extra clothes, and then crossed the road.

 

Jensen followed Jared as the man made his way along a worn path beside the bridge. The water that ran below the bridge looked murky and low enough to walk through.

 

"The water comes down the falls," Jared said over his shoulder as they walked. "Gets churned up when it goes over the rocks and looks kind of cloudy."

 

"Yeah?" Jensen didn't know why Jared was telling him this. Still, he followed him, the path now at enough of an incline to make him lean forward slightly. "You going to tell me what you're up to?"

 

Breathing a bit harder, Jared laughed, his tongue skating along his bottom lip. "You'll see when we get there," he grinned.

 

To Jensen, it felt like they'd walked way too far into the woods. He wasn't sure they could make it back. He could hear the constant rushing sound of water, overpowering the sounds of nature. Jared finally broke into a clearing and smiled down at the huge pool of water that the falls cascaded into. The picture was serene, not another soul in sight.

 

Staring, Jensen took a few heaving breaths. "Wow," he said. "This is beautiful."

 

Still grinning, Jared reached out and playfully punched Jensen's shoulder. "Get undressed."

 

He quickly tore his gaze away from the picturesque scenery before him. "What?"

 

Jared unrolled the clothes he had with him, producing two pairs of swim trunks. "We're going swimming," he told him.

 

"I just got done swimming," he reminded Jared. "And you want me to go back in?"

 

Slipping off his jacket, Jared then tugged at the button on his jeans. "This place has something that swim practice doesn't."

 

Jensen wasn't following his example. Instead, he watched Jared pull his shirt up over his head. "Really," he said. "What's that?"

 

"Well," he said thoughtfully, yanking off one boot. "No chlorine, for one." He tugged at his other boot, letting it fall to the ground beside the first. "No timers." He ripped off the skullcap, unfastened his jeans and shimmied them down. "But best of all," he grinned, hooking his thumbs into his boxer briefs. "Me!"

 

Jensen watched as Jared whipped down his boxers, clearly not ashamed of anything he had. Not that he should be, Jensen decided. Still, it brought out the shy teenager in him, and he turned away from the naked man. He didn't turn back around until he heard the whisper of the nylon material of the swim trunks and the snap of elastic. When he looked back at Jared, he had the spare pair of shorts thrown in his face.

 

"Get changed, lame-ass," Jared grinned. "We're going for a swim."

 

"Jared, it's too cold," he complained.

 

"No excuses," he refused. "I want you naked and into those swim trunks yesterday."

 

Sighing, Jensen took off his leather jacket and scowled harshly at Jared. "Don't look, you weirdo," he said.

 

Only a matter of minutes later, Jared screamed playfully and ran along the path to the water. He jumped off of a boulder and did a cannonball into the deep pool. A second later, he emerged, shaking his head and huffing a breath. He cried out triumphantly, his laugh contagious. "Come on in, man!" he called. "The water's perfect."

 

"Like hell it is," Jensen chuckled.

 

"Watch your mouth," he teased. "You'll ruin my fucking morals."

 

"You don't _have_ any."

 

"Oh, yeah." Jared laughed and swam away, giving Jensen room for his jump. "Come on, pansy-ass," he encouraged.

 

"You reference my ass an awful lot."

 

"It warrants it," he shrugged. "Get in this water, or I'll come out there and get you."

 

Sighing again, Jensen gathered up what miniscule courage he felt he had and stepped out onto the boulder that Jared had dived from. He took a deep breath, centered his concentration and made a perfect dive into the water with minimal splashing. Emerging, Jensen tried to breathe, but found it difficult. "Holy crap," he finally managed. "This water is freezing!"

 

Swimming closer, Jared felt his own teeth chattering just slightly. "It won't be in a minute," he told him.

 

Jensen felt the wake of water from Jared's strokes and shivered. "Why, because we'll die of hypothermia?"

 

Not answering him, Jared touched Jensen's face and kissed him. He loved the fact that Jensen readily opened his mouth to him, letting him in right away. Even in just a short time, the young man had become more comfortable with such closeness.

 

Jensen tried to remember to tread water, but it was difficult with Jared's tongue sliding against his. Jared was right though; the chill in the water faded as warmth spread out from Jensen's belly, all the way out to the very tips of his fingers. He chanced faltering in his swimmer's rhythm and touched Jared's face in the same fashion that he was being touched.

 

Backing away slowly, Jared smiled at him. "Better?"

 

Jensen swallowed, feeling his heart pound mercilessly in his chest. He nodded instead of speaking, so sure that he wouldn't be able to if he tried.

 

"Now," he continued. "I want you to get out of the water, and dive back in."

 

"Why?"

 

"Because your first try was lame."

 

Jensen was stunned. "That was a perfect dive!"

 

"Exactly." He poked Jensen's shoulder with one finger. "You have to stop being so fucking rigid. Get out and do a goddamn cannonball."

 

"Why?"

 

Jared leaned in closer, smiling. "Because it's _fun_ ," he explained. "Be a kid for once."

 

"I'm not a kid."

 

"Shut up," he snapped. "Come on."

 

Back out of the water again, the air felt colder than it had before. Jensen could see the chills on his skin and wanted to be back in the water, even though it had felt cold at first.

 

Jared crouched down in a sprinting stance. "Ready?"

 

Laughing, Jensen shook his head. "I guess."

 

Jared reached out and took hold of Jensen's arm, assuring that he would follow. "Alright, go!"

 

They both took off like a shot, running down the path and onto the boulder. Jared was doing some sort of war cry that was catching. Jensen laughed and joined in, shouting as loud as he possibly could. They leapt off of the boulder at relatively the same time, curling their legs into themselves. Their splash created a large wake that crashed up onto the shore, wetting the boulder and grass.

 

Jensen started laughing before he even reached the surface of the water. He ended up choking, but only coughed with a bright smile upon his face. Jared was right - it was good to be a kid again now and then.

 

After a few more cannonballs, both boys decided that they were done. The sun was out in full force, and the boulder was warm when they settled down upon it.

 

"You didn't bring _towels_?"

 

"Oh, my God, you baby," Jared scolded. "You'll dry."

 

Jensen sighed and rolled over onto his stomach, resting his head on his arms. His eyes drifted closed as Jared sat down beside him, stretching out his long legs.

 

The sound of the waterfall was soothing. Jared liked to hang out there whenever life felt a little too hectic. He was glad that he had shared it with Jensen. Gazing down at him now, Jared smiled. He leaned down and placed a kiss on the young man's shoulder. "You look happy," he almost whispered.

 

Opening his eyes, Jensen looked up at Jared. He propped himself up on one elbow, resting his head in his hand. "I think I am," he agreed.

 

"You don't know?"

 

"Well, I've just never really been happy before, I don't think," he admitted. "That sounds really exaggerated, but...I mean, I had moments of happiness, but I don't really think I've ever been completely at peace with things."

 

"Are you now?"

 

Jensen smiled and nodded. "I think so," he agreed. "Because of you." His smile lessened as his gaze fell, landing on the glittering silver rings that adorned Jared's chest. "Is it true, what you said about these?"

 

Grinning, Jared eyed him. "Why don't you find out?"

 

Jensen had never touched the rings. The invitation to do so made his heart pound in his chest, blood rushing through his veins and throbbing in his head. Slowly, he reached out and brushed his fingertips over one of the metal rings. He traced underneath it, and then over it once again. Gently. Warily. Afraid that he might hurt Jared. When he glanced up into Jared's eyes, he saw that he wasn't hurting him at all. As a matter of fact, Jared's pupils were dilated and his chest was rising and falling a little heavier than before.

 

He wasn't sure what made him act so forwardly, but Jensen wondered what the metal tasted like against Jared's skin. He leaned in closer, keeping his gaze locked with Jared's until he couldn't any longer, and opened his mouth.

 

Jared watched Jensen lean in to him, purposefully making sure he took measured breaths to keep himself calm. He felt Jensen's wet, warm tongue skate across his nipple and the rings, making his breath hitch in his lungs for a moment. He reached up and set a hand to Jensen's head, wanting to hold him there forever, pull him in so that he bit down just enough for it to feel perfect. Jensen was shy though, and the fact that he had started this on his own was surprising enough. Jared didn't want to push him.

 

He tasted like clean, cold water with a gentle tang of salt. Quickly, Jared's skin and the metal pierced through it warmed to Jensen's tongue.

 

Instead of encouraging Jensen to do more, harder, Jared took hold of Jensen's hand and slid it down his belly, south of the elastic waist on the swim trunks. "Look what you're doing," he told him, speaking in breathy tones into his ear.

 

Jensen's hand formed to the bulge in Jared's trunks, but he did not move to stroke him. Instead, he backed away and looked up into the man's eyes. With his hand still resting upon Jared, he looked up into perfect blue-green eyes. "We should go," he said. "Jeffrey wants to go to the game with us."

 

Jared wanted to protest, tell Jensen that what he was doing wasn't fair, but he didn't. He took a deep breath, sighed, and nodded his head. "Okay," he agreed. "Yeah. Let's go."


	11. Chapter ten

  
Author's notes: **Double post today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

"Which one is he?"

 

Jensen shivered, feeling like his breath should be clouding around his head as he bent to the side to point out the correct player. "The quarterback," he answered. "The one that has the ball right now."

 

Jared leaned to one side, then the other, trying to get a good look at Doug. "He's kinda scrawny."

 

Jeffrey chuckled. The same thought had gone through his head, but of course he'd opted not to say it, for fear of hurting Jensen's feelings. Jared, however, did not have such a social filter. "Jay."

 

Jared glanced over at the older man. "He is," he said, shrugging his shoulders.

 

Chris was seated to the other side of Jared and laughed when the man pointed out the obvious. He didn't really know him, but he could tell that he liked him already. And he was important to Jensen, which was really all that mattered.

 

"He makes up for it," Jensen assured them. "He's got a bad reputation and one hell of an uppercut."

 

"You know from experience, huh?" Jeffrey smiled.

 

Jensen nodded his head and sighed. He shivered again. The day wasn't overly chilled, but the trip to the swimming hole had sapped all of his inner warmth from him. Even if it had been freezing, the fans were devoted to the school team. They were one of the best in the league, probably because of Doug. He was a good player, but he had poor sportsmanship and had no qualms about cheating to win. "I'm freezing," Jensen said. "They should have coffee for sale over at the Snack Shack. Anybody want anything?"

 

Jeffrey dug into his jeans pocket, grunting as he straightened out his leg to try and get the money out. "Yeah," he said. "Get me a coffee. Black is fine."

 

Jensen waved away Jeffrey's money and looked at Jared. "You want anything?"

 

"Hot dog," Jared answered, not taking his eyes off of the game. "The works."

 

Laughing, Jensen shook his head as he got up from the bleachers. "Chris?"

 

"I'm good, thanks," he returned. He looked back to the game, clapping his hands at a good play and shouting encouragement to the team.

 

Jensen nodded and climbed down and headed for the Snack Shack, fishing his wallet out of his back pocket. Jeffrey watched him go, a watchful eye over his boy. Even though Jensen wasn't his son, he'd grown fond of the boy and he couldn't help but be protective of him.

 

Jared turned away from glancing in Jensen's direction, too. He sniffled through his nose and rubbed his hands together. His hair was still damp. When they had arrived home, Jeffrey had scolded both of them, telling them that if they didn't get pneumonia, it would be a miracle. Sighing, Jared shook his head. "God, I must love that jerk," he grumbled. "Freezing my ass off."

 

Jeffrey looked over at him, his smile bright. "I think that's the first time I've ever heard you say that." He glanced over at Chris with a look that silently told the young man that this was a big deal.

 

"What?" Jared returned.

 

"That you love someone."

 

He didn't look at Jeffrey. He stayed curled into himself, his knee bouncing out of both nervous habit and chills. "Yeah, well," he sighed. "People tend not to stick around, so..."

 

It wasn't often that Jared was serious enough for such conversation, and Jeffrey never pushed him about it. But when he got into the mood, Jeffrey would eke a few things out of him that the boy would otherwise not admit. "So you try not to get attached."

 

"Yeah." It was quiet for a second, Jared coughing against the cold air in his lungs, still keeping his eyes on the game. "You stuck around at least."

 

Jeffrey smiled. Taking a deep breath, he looked out to the game and cleared his throat. "Yeah," he agreed. "That's just to make your life hell though."

 

"And a fucking stellar job you do at that, old man."

 

They laughed again, quickly glancing to each other and then over to Jensen as he neared them. He carried a disposable tray with two cups of coffee and a heavily loaded hot dog atop it.

 

"That was fast," Jeffrey said, accepting one of the cups of coffee. "Thank you."

 

"I think everyone's conserving body heat and not going down there," Jensen joked.

 

"Well, you were the fools that went swimming."

 

Jared dug into his hot dog, holding the disposable tray on his lap. While he ate, Jensen curled his lip around the cup of coffee in his hands. He blew on it and sipped gingerly, relishing the feel of the hot liquid slipping down his throat and expanding in his chest. It warmed his body, stopped his shivers. 

 

Leaning a bit closer to Chris, Jared spoke around the hot dog in his mouth. "Which one is yours?"

 

Chris saw him watching the cheerleaders and chuckled. He pointed out one of the girls. She had short blonde hair and the perfect little figure and, in short, was everything a cheerleader should be. "That one there," he said. "Her name is Dani."

 

"Cute," Jared nodded, finishing off the hotdog. While he ate the last of it, he set the disposable tray on the bleacher seat in front of him. Barely even a second after he had swallowed, his body racked with a spasm, and he belched loudly. "Ah!"

 

"Jared," Jeffrey said sternly.

 

"Sorry." He smiled sheepishly.

 

"Someday, you'll be a real boy," Jeffrey teased, "and a functioning part of society."

 

"Bite your tongue."

 

"You're not the only one that's horrified," he said. "Trust me."

 

Jensen glanced over at Chris, both of them laughing at the two men. Jared reached around Jensen and punched Jeffrey's shoulder, but the man merely put up his fists, as if he was going to fight back but never intending to. 

 

Finally, the football team set up for one more play, but they were so far ahead of the other team, that they just let the clock run down. They all congratulated each other on the field. Doug jumped up and bumped chests with several of his teammates, declaring himself the victor. Coach had to remind him that it was the team that won, not just him.

 

In the parking lot, Jeffrey told Jared and Jensen that he was taking them out for Chinese. He invited Chris and Dani to come along, and Chris took him up on the offer.

 

"Sure, Dani'd like that, I think," he nodded. "That is, if Jen doesn't mind me hanging around." He playfully wrapped his arm around Jensen's neck and tugged him down into a headlock.

 

Jared watched, a huge grin on his face. While Chris had him bent down, he took advantage of the situation and heartily smacked Jensen's backside. He laughed when the young man cried out in mock pain, which only made him repeat his movements.

 

Jensen laughed and tried to work out of Chris's ironclad hold, but he wasn't exactly on the wrestling team. He could hear Jeffrey laughing with them, and blindly reached for the man, begging for help with feigned distress.

 

"Well, goddamn," someone said.

 

Everyone turned to see who had interrupted the rough-housing. Finally released, Jensen straightened and looked too. His heart sank when he saw Doug staring back at them. His three best friends walked behind him as they usually did, like little lost puppies.

 

"Looks like little Jenny Mae's in trouble."

 

"Go away, Doug," Chris said.

 

"What are you doing here, Kane?" Doug asked. "Shouldn't you be out somewhere fucking that whore of yours?"

 

Chris gritted his teeth as he glared over at him. "She's still inside getting changed," he said as calmly as he could. "But if you call her a whore again, I'll rip your head off."

 

Doug laughed at the threat. "Ooh," he lowed. "I'm really scared." He strode closer to Jensen, his walk that of a man who thought he was God's gift to everyone and everything.

 

Jensen watched him warily, anxiety clutching at his stomach. "Go away, Doug," he said. He cursed his voice for giving out on him, cracking and making him sound as afraid as he really felt.

 

Pretending to be offended, Doug stepped closer. "Jenny, Jenny," he almost sighed. "Is that any way to treat your rescuer?"

 

Jeffrey watched from his place, ready to step in if needed, but letting Jensen tend to his own problems. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jared start to step closer to interfere, and reached out to him. He grabbed hold of Jared's arm and shook his head at him when Jared met his gaze.

 

"Rescuer?" Jensen smiled. "What are you talking about?"

 

Doug glanced around to Jared, Jeffrey and Chris, then back to his goons. "Looked to me like you were on your way to being gang-banged."

 

Smile disappearing, Jensen shook his head. "Shut up."

 

"Or, maybe that's what you were hoping for," Doug grinned, "eh, little twink?"

 

Jared roughly shook off Jeffrey's hold on his arm. He headed towards Doug and purposefully bumped into him hard enough to knock the man off balance. He glared down at him, nose-to-nose with the bully. Jaw aligned in fury, Jared clenched his teeth and refused to back down.

 

Doug wasn't moving either. After catching his balance, he stood as tall as he could, still falling a couple inches short of Jared's six-foot-five-inch height. "You got a problem, pretty boy?" he snarled.

 

"No, but you do now," Jared returned.

 

"Jared, come on," Jensen said, setting a hand to the man's shoulder. "He's not worth it, come on."

 

"Yeah, come on, _Jared_ ," Doug smiled, narrowing his eyes.

 

Jared's jaw muscles were flexing, his nostrils flaring, fury bubbling below the less-than-calm exterior. Jeffrey saw the signs of the impending fight and took it upon himself to stop it. He knew Jared better than any of the others, knew he could talk him down.

 

Wedging himself between the two of them, Jeffrey faced his boy. "Walk away, Jared," he advised. He pushed the man back slightly, making more room between him and Doug. "Walk away." He turned around and faced the instigator, pointing away from the group. "You too," he told Doug. "Walk away right now."

 

Doug smiled and took a step back. "Hear that, Jared?" he smirked. "Your old sugar-daddy has spoken. Better do what he says or he won't butt-fuck you like a good little fag."

 

Fury flashed in Jeffrey's eyes. He didn't care that Doug thought he was gay. He didn't even really care that the man was clearly homophobic. What he did care about, was that the little jerk was calling his boy a fag. Shaking his head, Jeffrey narrowed his eyes at him. "You really _are_ as dumb as you look, ain't you?"

 

Doug only laughed.

 

Jeffrey stepped out from between Doug and Jared. "Kick his ass," he said, nodding to the high schooler. "I don't even care anymore."

 

There was only a split-second in which fear flashed across Doug's face. His eyes widened as he saw Jared's fist coming directly for him. He didn't have time to duck, and Jared's fist connected with his mouth, sending him reeling down to the parking lot floor. His goons did not move to defend him, instead crowding around him and helping him to stand back up. Furious, he shook them off and looked back over at Jared, blood flowing down his chin and neck.

 

"This ain't over, Ackles," he growled. "I swear to God, you're dead."

 

Jared puffed up again, taking a step closer. "Try it," he warned, "and I'll fucking kill _you_."

 

Doug stumbled backwards when Jared neared him. He gathered his things, and his followers, and headed towards his car.

 

The fight was over almost as soon as it started. Jared shook off the pain in his hand, clenching and unclenching his fist. Chris saw Danielle emerge from the school, her hair still wet from the quick shower she always took after a game. He quickly told her what had gone down, but reassured her that everything was alright.

 

Jensen, still stunned, stared over at Jared, green eyes wide. He had seen him fight before. It was the man's words that had him worried. _Try it, and I'll fucking kill you_. He wasn't sure if he should feel flattered or fearful.

 

 

 

 

At the restaurant, Jared's hand didn't look any better. It was already bruising, making Jensen worry. "Are you sure your hand's okay?"

 

Jared looked down at it, amidst his meal, and flexed his fingers. "Yeah," he said. "No big deal."

 

Jensen managed to eat a decent meal. Even though he laughed with Jared and the others, he still ran through the events in the parking lot. Why did Doug have to show up? Why did he have to be a jerk? And why did he have to insult Jeffrey? He felt like his past was hurting the ones he loved.

 

Jeffrey paid for dinner, even though Jensen offered to help. He still had some money saved up, as Dad had demanded he and his siblings do when they reached a certain age. Jeffrey wouldn't hear of it though. He paid for the meal and Jensen walked with Chris over to his friend's car to say good night.

 

"Call me tomorrow, okay?" he offered. "We can still go get your stuff."

 

"Yeah."

 

"Hey." Chris glanced over to Jared, where the man stood beside the car with Jeffrey. "Don't worry about what happened. Maybe Dougie learned his lesson, hm?"

 

Jensen smiled even though he didn't feel like it. "Yeah," he returned. "Maybe." Fat chance. He watched Chris settle Danielle into the car and then slip into the driver's seat. He waved at him as he drove off, a smile still pasted to his face.

 

The ride back home was done in silence on Jensen's part. Jeffrey and Jared played music and talked, but Jensen was still too worried. What was Doug going to do to him? He knew he wouldn't forget this and knew that he would blame Jensen. That Jensen would be the one he'd come after, because Jared wasn't someone he'd be able to stand up to.

 

Finally home, Jensen settled on the sofa with Jared to watch television for awhile. They both had a beer in their grasps, but Jensen's was almost untouched.

 

"Hey," he finally spoke. "What you said in the parking lot?"

 

Jared turned and looked at him. "What'd I say?"

 

"That you'd kill Doug," he reminded him. "But those were just words, right?" He saw Jared staring at him, a slight furrow in his brow. "I mean, you'd never really _hurt_ him, right?"

 

After a moment of stillness, Jared nodded his head. "Yeah," he answered. "I would. I'd fucking kill him if he touched you."

 

Fear snaked its way around his throat again. He nodded at Jared, trying to swallow. "Oh," he breathed. He turned back to the television and stared at it, but processed nothing. He heard Jared laugh at the sitcom and tried to smile with him. He doubted it worked, however, since he couldn't get Jared's words out of his head.


	12. Chapter eleven

  
Author's notes: Bloody and Evil thank you all for reading and the awesome comments! Thanks so much!!  
 **Double post!**  
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* * *

Jared had had no trouble getting to sleep, but Jensen just lay there, staring at the ceiling. He couldn't seem to switch off at all, his mind confused with the night's events. That Jared would stand up for him was something he had expected, but to see it first-hand had been a solid reminder of just who exactly he was dealing with. He was already fucked, he knew that. He couldn't imagine not having Jared in his life any more, and they had only known each other for a very short time indeed. But Jensen had almost forgotten, with the previous events of the day, just what sort of person his new friend was. He was glad that Jeffrey had been there to make sure it didn't go too far, although he was pretty sure in Doug's eyes that it had been far enough.

 

It was already the early hours of Sunday morning and Jensen was dreading school on Monday. Knowing he wouldn't sleep, he crawled out from under the sheets and carefully climbed down the ladder to the ground floor of the garage. His schoolbooks were stacked neatly on one end of Jared's workbench - an area he'd been told he could use as his desk if he wanted. He clicked on a light, knowing it wouldn't disturb Jared because the guy was flat out and snoring, and opened up his books to start on the homework he had to do. It would take him a few hours, he knew, but there was no way he was going to be able to sleep. Doug wasn't the only thing that he was nervous over, after all.

 

Along with the dread settling in his stomach, there was an anxious excitement over his and Jared's plans for the late morning. Jensen had settled next to Jared in bed a few hours earlier and told him that he wanted a tattoo. He'd thought about it all the way through the football game and decided that this was something of Jared's that he wanted to share in. Jared had kissed him and told him he'd take him to Eric's place in the morning. Eric was never busy on a Sunday morning and Jared knew he'd do the favor, because he liked to be owed.

 

"I'll pay him," Jensen had said, misunderstanding.

 

"Yeah, that's not what I meant. Think about what you want, and think hard. Once it's done, it's done. It's there for the rest of your life."

 

"I know," Jensen had replied, quietly.

 

And now, sat writing the essays he had to hand in the next day, Jensen found his mind wandering to the designs he had seen on Friday night, plastered on Eric's walls. He had an idea of what he wanted, though. And he knew where. He considered getting Jared to drop him off and wait somewhere else, but then wondered if Jared would go along with that, or if he would have the balls to go through with it without Jared there. He had a few hours to decide. For now, he thought, he would distract himself with English.

 

 

 

 

"Jensen.." The word was stretched out, spoken in a sing-song voice. Jensen felt something warm and wet tugging him back into consciousness and he lifted his head slowly, scowling as he realised he had a sheet of paper stuck to his cheek. He peeled it off, blinking groggily down at his work. He'd mostly finished it, but knew he'd have to read through it to make sure his sleepy brain hadn't made any stupid mistakes. He shivered as Jared mouthed against the back of his neck again, and then turned in his chair to accept a proper kiss. 

 

"Hey," he said, sounding tired.

 

"You okay?"

 

"Yeah, I'm good. I'm sorry, I couldn't sleep so-"

 

"It's all right. Jeff's made breakfast anyway. C'mon. We'll go eat and then we'll get over to Eric's, before you change your mind."

 

Jensen nodded, letting Jared give him a hand up out of his seat. His body felt heavy, but he figured after a good breakfast and maybe a hot shower, he should feel a lot better. He followed Jared into the house, thanking Jeffrey as a plate of bacon, eggs, french toast, hash browns and sausages was set in front of him.

 

"You look like shit," Jeffrey commented, sitting in his usual place. Jared started squeezing ketchup all over his breakfast while Jensen just sighed and nodded in agreement. He probably _did_ look like shit. "Is this anything to do with Jared's dumbass behavior last night?"

 

"Nah," Jared interrupted. "He's just shitting it 'cause he said he'd get a tattoo done today. We're going to Eric's in a couple hours."

 

Jeffrey chuckled, accepting the explanation. Jensen was kind of glad. He didn't want to go into about how worried he'd felt getting into bed with Jared last night, or how he knew Doug wouldn't be able to leave it, despite the punch Jared had thrown. They ate in relative silence, and it was Jeffrey who got up and started to clear everything away. Jensen went to find some clean clothes - he really was looking forward to getting more of his stuff from home - and then headed for the shower while Jared helped with the dishes.

 

 

 

 

Eric's place didn't look any less dingy in the full morning light, Jensen decided. He let Jared lead the way, but found himself pushed ahead when they reached the door. Eric looked up as they entered and Jensen's stomach flipped like it had just hit him what he was about to do. There was no way he would be backing out of it, though.

 

"Nervous?" Jared asked, after they'd discussed the tattoo with Eric and Jensen was laid out on the couch with his shirt pulled up, waiting while Eric drew out the simple design.

 

"Uh, yeah? Just a lot."

 

"You want me to stay right here and hold your hand?"

 

Jensen glared at him. "Shut up."

 

"You know, you could've picked somewhere easier to have it. Right there's probably gonna hurt like a bitch-"

 

" _Jared_."

 

"I'm just sayin'! Look, I'll be right here if you need me, okay? You'll be fine."

 

Eric came over then, showed Jensen the design he'd drawn up. "This okay?"

 

"Looks great," Jensen told him, swallowing hard.

 

"You gotta be sure, kid."

 

Jensen took the sheet from him and studied the lines and colors. It was almost exactly how he'd pictured it, but obviously Eric wanted him to spend some time thinking about it. He stared at it some more until Eric held out his hand and coughed.

 

"You done?"

 

"Yeah..Sorry." Jensen handed it back. "It looks really good. Honest."

 

"Okay then. Let's get started."

 

A while later and the realization came that Jensen didn't know how Jared could be used to this. His fingers were curled tightly into the cushion beneath him and he was pretty sure his lip was bleeding again. His eyes were watering, definitely, but he'd be damned if this was going to make him cry. Jeffrey was right; he really had to toughen up. He'd tried to watch the actual tattooing, but the moment the needle touched his skin he found he couldn't concentrate on anything but the hot, sharp pain like his skin was being cut into with broken glass. After a little while, Eric asked him if he wanted to take a break and he just shook his head no. He wanted to get it over with as soon as possible, despite the relief a break from it might bring him.

 

The whole thing took just under an hour and a half. By the end of it, Jensen would quite happily have ripped his skin off just to stop the near-excruciating pain. 

 

"You all right?" Jared asked, as Eric went to grab a bandage to cover the tattoo over with. Jensen looked down at his hip and winced at the blood there.

 

"Yeah. Just..Really sore."

 

"Warned you."

 

"I know."

 

"It'll ease off, Jen. You'll be okay." He went quiet when Eric came back and bandaged Jensen up. Jensen straightened his clothes and then pulled out his wallet to pay. Eric waved the money away.

 

"But-"

 

"'Nother time, son. You'll be back."

 

Jensen doubted it, not with the way he felt right now. But he gave in and stuffed his wallet back into his jeans pocket. "Thanks," he said. Eric nodded and then turned away, obviously happy for them both to leave now. Jensen sure as hell wasn't going to argue with that; he was more than ready to go. Out on the street, Jared told him that he wanted to take him out for lunch. 

 

"Where?"

 

"I was thinking maybe Wendy's."

 

"Don't you think you've kind of had enough junk for one weekend?" Jensen asked.

 

"You sound like Jeff. Lighten up, Jen. This is your first real weekend of freedom. Live a little." He winked. "I'll get Jeff to cook you some veggies tomorrow, since you're obviously missing them. Anyway, Wendy's do have a salad bar. I'm sure your body can handle it."

 

Jensen wrinkled his nose, but didn't argue further. He would make sure he got a decent meal at the school cafeteria the next day, if such a thing was even possible. 

 

 

 

 

The parking lot at Wendy's was surprisingly full, but then Jensen supposed it would be full of families too tired to cook at home, or too annoyed by their kids to say no. There were a couple of mopeds, but mostly it was saloon cars and station wagons. Jared was going to stand out like a sore thumb. As they got off the bike and took off their helmets, Jensen again complained about having to eat a burger for Sunday lunch. Told Jared it wasn't right. 

 

"I told you, lighten up. This is just lunch. We can have a decent meal later, if you really must. C'mere.." Jared reached across as if to grab Jensen by the back of the neck. Jensen ducked away from him before he even got close, then straightened and found Jared was staring at him. "What the hell was that?"

 

"What the hell was what?" Jensen mumbled, starting to turn away. Jared got hold of his arm, though, stopped him going.

 

"I wasn't going to hurt you. Is that what you thought?"

 

Jensen shrugged, wishing they could do this somewhere else. "No. I just...You took me by surprise. I'm sorry."

 

Jared searched his eyes a moment more, then nodded, letting him go. He was gnawing on his bottom lip as he led Jensen inside. He didn't even look behind him as he headed for the counter, so Jensen just said that he was going to grab them a booth near the window and let him go. His heart was thudding as he sat down. He knew Jared wouldn't let this go; knew that he shouldn't be so scared. He had nothing to be afraid of. It wasn't him that Jared had threatened. But, still, he couldn't help himself. He made himself comfortable, his side still hurting, and felt his phone vibrate in his pocket as he did. 

 

There was a message from his brother, Josh. The feelings of dread suddenly shifted their focus. This was the first time he'd heard from a family member since Friday night, which in all honesty hadn't surprised him. He'd had a feeling that his father would forbid anyone from trying to get in contact with Jensen. Alan would likely just want to pretend his other son did not exist. The message from Josh made him wonder about this theory, however.

 

**YOU SKIPPING CHURCH NOW?**

 

Jensen glanced up at where Jared stood, still waiting to be served. He quickly sent back a reply. **MAYBE JUST THIS WEEK**. About thirty seconds later, his phone vibrated again. **DAD'S PISSED AT YOU, BUT HE'S NOT TALKING ABOUT IT**. Jensen sighed, his fingers working over the buttons. **HE'S THE ONE WHO SAID I SHOULD LEAVE. TELL HIM IT'S HIS OWN FAULT**. He hit send, seeing that Jared was now asking for their food. He didn't need this right now. He had enough to think about. But Josh replied again, after a couple more minutes, and the words made Jensen's eyes feel hot. **I HOPE YOUR NEW LIFE IS WORTH IT. YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU NO MATTER WHAT. YOU'RE MY LITTLE BRO', NOTHING'LL CHANGE THAT. I JUST PRAY THIS DOESN'T TURN OUT TO BE A HUGE MISTAKE**.

 

Jensen stared at those words, wondering how in hell his brother always had the worst possible timing. Right when Jensen was sitting there, doubting himself, and he had to come out with that? He shook his head at the display, knowing that he couldn't prove his father right. "It won't," he whispered to himself. "I promise."

 

"Everything okay?" Jared asked, sitting opposite Jensen and placing the tray firmly between them.

 

Jensen flipped the phone closed quietly and looked up. "Yeah. Just my brother, checking up on me."

 

Jared nodded and said no more. Jensen knew he was probably still mad about the thing in the parking lot and that they _would_ talk about it, but it was obvious that talking was the last thing on Jared's mind right now. He pulled his food towards him and opened everything up, realizing how hungry he'd gotten since breakfast.

 

"Padalecki?"

 

Jensen looked up at the guy who'd interrupted them, found himself staring at a neatly-dressed, middle-aged black man and wondering how in hell he knew Jared. Jared, who simply looked bored. "Hey, Jensen, meet Bill. My old parole officer." He said it so loudly, so nonchalantly, that Jensen kind of wished the ground would swallow him up right then and there. He didn't look around, certain that the families in the booths either side of them were hearing Jared perfectly clearly. "What's up, Bill?"

 

"Is that your bike out there?" Bill asked, nodding towards the parking lot outside the window.

 

Jared grinned, almost sheepish. "Sort of."

 

"Well, it's _sort of_ illegally parked. You want to go move it?"

 

"Weren't you supposed to get off my case about this shit, like, nine years ago or something?"

 

"Just trying to help you out, Jay. Don't want you getting a ticket."

 

Jared looked straight at him, then out of the window, directly at his bike. "Think I'll see 'em coming. Thanks anyway."

 

"Aside from illegal parking are you behaving these days? I gotta say, I was glad not to hear your name come up again after the whole Chuck thing happened."

 

"Yeah, I'm behaving just fine. Just ask him." He pointed at Jensen who looked like he was trying to bury himself inside the collar of his jacket. Bill, thankfully, ignored him, as frustrated with this conversation as Jensen was embarrassed by it.

 

"Stay out of trouble, all right?"

 

Jared didn't answer, just waved him away. Jensen concentrated hard on his burger, knowing Jared was just waiting for him to say something. He examined the beef closely and then took a big bite, trying and failing to keep his gaze from flicking up to the other man. Jared was watching him and the expression on his face was impossible to pin down. Jensen didn't know whether he looked more worried, pissed off, impatient or _what_.

 

"Ain't you even gonna ask?" Jared finally said, slouching back in his seat. 

 

Jensen put his burger down and wiped at his mouth with one of the rough paper serviettes. "Ask what?"

 

Jared simply stared at him, then shook his head and picked up his own food. "Never mind," he told him, before taking a huge bite. Jensen was left feeling more than confused and without much more of an appetite. He dropped the remainder of his burger back into its box and drank the rest of his coffee, trying to burn away the nausea now churning his stomach. The rest of the meal was quiet and weird. Jared didn't seem too bothered by the lack of conversation, which was just as well since Jensen hadn't the first clue what to say. He didn't even mention it when he picked up the remainder of what Jensen hadn't eaten and tossed it in the trash along with his own leftovers. 

 

Out in the parking lot, however, he didn't head straight for the bike. Instead he started making his way round the side of the building, leaving Jensen not much choice but to follow. He was startled as Jared turned to him once they were out of sight and pushed him against the wall, kissing him hungrily. Jensen could taste ketchup and pickles on his tongue and tried to remember to breathe as he kissed back, pushing at Jared with both hands. He managed to make him take a half-step back and looked up at him, panting.

 

"You could've warned me," he complained.

 

"Is that what the problem is? You want a warning? I would've done it in there, but there was this six year old brat staring at us from the booth behind you."

 

"Maybe we should go home or-"

 

"When are you ever gonna ask me, Jen? You want to know about it all, don't you?"

 

Jensen shrugged, trying to swallow. He couldn't meet Jared's eyes as he spoke, knowing the words were mostly untrue. "You'll tell me when you're ready," he said, wishing he could have the guts to just ask and accept whatever Jared told him. He'd known the guy was trouble. Look at the first time they'd met, for God's sake. Look at what had happened at Mickey's. He just wasn't sure he wanted to know how much trouble. Not just yet. He breathed out as Jared let go of his shoulder and cupped his cheek.

 

"Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks."

 

He didn't know what Jared was thanking him for, but he just nodded. Let Jared tilt his head back for another, gentler kiss. 

 

"We should get going. What time did Chris say you should be at his place?"

 

"Not till later. Mom and Dad will go out around four-thirty and won't come back till about eight. So we have a few hours."

 

"What do you want to do for those few hours?" Jared asked.

 

"Homework," Jensen said, remembering that he hadn't quite finished everything before he'd been woken up that morning. Jared's face fell. 

 

"Homework? Really?"

 

"I have to. I know it doesn't seem important to you, but I have to keep my grades up and-"

 

"That you or your dad talking?" The scowl was back in place now and Jensen frowned, a little annoyed. 

 

"Me." He said nothing more, not wanting to explain any further, and Jared didn't ask. Just led him round to the bike in silence.


	13. Chapter twelve

"Hey, son," Chris grinned, pulling open the door and leaning on the frame. "Ready to go?"

 

"Definitely. If I have to borrow any more of Jared's clothes I'm going to end up falling over myself. Turnups aren't back in fashion yet, right?"

 

Laughing, Chris stepped outside and shut the door behind him, twirling his truck keys around one finger. "No Jared?"

 

"He said he'd meet us there," Jensen answered, shrugging. 

 

"Everything okay?"

 

"I guess. I don't know, it's just..it's kind of been a weird day."

 

"Weird?"

 

Jensen just turned away from Chris and looked towards the road. "Yeah, don't worry about it. Sooner we get to mine and get my stuff, the sooner I can relax. C'mon." 

 

Chris said nothing more and walked around his truck to open it up. As Jensen climbed in beside him he asked, "You sure you want to do this? I mean, once you take your stuff out of there it's pretty final."

 

"It's already final. Dad won't take me back, and Jared..."

 

"You don't want to go back, do you?"

 

Jensen breathed in deeply. "No. I really don't."

 

"But there's something else." Chris started the engine and looked over at him. "You sure you're okay?"

 

Looking straight ahead, he nodded. "I'm sure."

 

 

 

 

When they arrived at Jensen's place, the only car out front was Josh's. That was exactly as planned and Jensen let out a breath he hadn't realised he'd been holding. Complete relief washed over him. He had been afraid that something would have gone wrong, that his parents would have stayed home for some reason for the first time in a decade. That somehow, in some way, his plan to get in and out and retrieve everything that belonged to him without having to speak to his father would have gone badly wrong. He relaxed as he got out of the truck and led Chris to the front door. 

 

It felt odd to ring the doorbell for his own home, but Jensen had left his key behind when he had gone. He had a feeling his Dad would have changed the locks if he hadn't anyway. Who knew what the man was capable of? Kenzie opened it up and Chris stood awkwardly behind Jensen as his little sister tackled him into a huge hug. Jensen wrapped his arms around her, kissed the top of her head. 

 

"Hey, little sis."

 

"I've been so _worried_ , Jen," she told him, her voice shaking. He knew she was trying not to cry and patted her back gently. 

 

"I know, little sis. Josh said. But don't, all right? Hey, I'm your big brother. I can take care of myself."

 

"Yes, you can, it's just-"

 

"Dad's not about to throw you out too."

 

"Jensen?"

 

Jensen felt his heart stop. He looked up over his sister's shoulder and saw his Mom standing in the doorway of the lounge. "Mom, what're you..I.."

 

His mother just walked up to him, his sister instinctively stepping out of the way to let her past. She took her son into her arms and held him tightly for a few seconds, then slowly pulled back to look him in the eyes. "I know you didn't want us to be here. Your father went without me. I told him I wasn't well." She paused for a moment, then squeezed Jensen's arm. "Don't think for a moment that this was what I wanted, sweetheart. I want you home. I just want you to be safe."

 

"I am safe, Mom. Jeffrey's a good man. He's taking care of me. So's Jared."

 

Donna nodded. "I know that. I know. They're good people. Your father disagrees, but I could tell. But you know if you ever need anything, if you ever need your family, then we're here." She took his face in her hands and kissed his forehead. "If you ever want to come back-"

 

"Yeah, mom. Of course.." Jensen's voice was quiet as he hugged his mother then, hard. He let her go at the sound of the Harley's engine outside. He and Chris both turned to watch Jared pull up and he could almost feel his mother's disappointment as she realized the meaning of Jared's arrival. Despite his worries and the fear that had occupied the back of his mind all day, Jensen still felt that slight flip in his stomach when Jared pulled off his helmet and smiled over at the group standing on the doorstep. He was clearly in a better mood now than he had been and Jensen hoped it would last; hoped that he wouldn't question again about what was on Jensen's mind that day.

 

His Mom was halfway through a greeting when Jared got close and tugged Jensen against him, kissing the side of his neck and his jaw. Jensen was too shocked to shy away from it, too startled to try and stop him. He quickly became aware that his mother and his sister were staring at him with open mouths. Jared noticed too and shuffled away from him, almost guiltily.

 

"Uh...I'm guessing they didn't know?"

 

Jensen was torn between yelling at Jared and pleading with his Mom when Donna calmly stepped back and said, "Well. I think maybe you boys should come in so I can go sit down."

 

"Mom, I can explain-"

 

Donna just held up a hand. "I really don't think you have to, not after that. Just...Come inside, please."

 

The three men followed her in and Chris went into the kitchen to make drinks with Kenzie while Jensen and Jared took seats in the lounge, opposite Donna. Jensen knew what the first question would be before it was even asked.

 

"Why didn't you tell us?" Then, almost immediately as Jensen opened his mouth to explain, "Never mind. I know why. Your father. The rest of us would have understood, but your father?"

 

"He doesn't have to find out, right?"

 

"Of course not. Not from me, at least." She thought for a few moments, the silence heavy and slightly uncomfortable. "How long? I mean...Before?" She didn't really need to finish the question. Jensen knew she was trying to find out if it had been Jared who had seduced her boy. He shook his head.

 

"I've known a long while, Mom. It wasn't just because I'm a loser that I never brought girls home."

 

Donna gave him a stern look. "You're not a loser, Jensen. That's your father talking, not you. He tries so hard to make you live up to what he expects of you that-"

 

"That I lost myself a little bit," Jensen interrupted. "I just keep thinking that I'll never be good enough for him. That nobody ever will."

 

"You will be, sweetheart. I know you. I think you'll surprise him yet."

 

Jared, who up till now had been lounging back beside Jensen with an almost smug expression on his face, sat forward then and patted Jensen on the shoulder. "He sure will, Mrs Ackles. The guy's been doing homework all day, just about. 'Cept this morning, 'cause-"

 

"Mom doesn't need to hear about this morning," Jensen said, loudly, talking over him. He glared across at Jared, hoping he'd shut him up. Jared just grinned back, trying and failing to look innocent. One secret coming out was enough for one day, Jensen thought. She'd no doubt find out about the tattoo soon enough, but he figured he'd surprised her plenty already. His mother looked between them both, clearly mistaking their expressions for something else.

 

"You're right, I probably don't need or want to. You're a grown man, Jensen, much as your father doesn't think so. What you want to do with your life is up to you. Speaking of which..." She set her hands against the arms of her chair and sat forward. "I'm guessing you're here to pick some stuff up."

 

Jensen felt his face get hot, but nodded. He stood, asking Jared to stay where he was. Kenzie and Chris, obviously having sensed the main discussion was over, came in then with a tray of drinks and cookies and set them down. Josh had joined them in the kitchen and stopped in the doorway, looking between Jared and his mother. The expression on his face was one of curiosity as he tried to work out what had happened before he'd got there, but nobody moved to clarify it to him. Jensen looked past him, focusing on a spot above his brother's shoulder.

 

"Chris, you want to come help me?"

 

"Sure thing."

 

Not looking at Jared or any of his family, Jensen hurried out of the room, Josh stepping aside to let him past. Chris followed him upstairs, wordlessly, and neither of them spoke until they were safely in Jensen's bedroom with the door closed behind them.

 

"Well, that was interesting," Jensen said, breaking the heavy silence. "I didn't think she'd be that...." He waved his hands vaguely and his friend nodded, agreeing. He let out a loud sigh and went to sit on his bed, covering his face with his hands and clutching his hair between his fingertips. He let go and looked up. "Thank god, huh?"

 

"You're a lucky guy."

 

"Yeah, sure. Mostly." He looked around the room, wondering how he'd managed to accumulate so few things in nineteen years. "C'mon. Let's get this show on the road."

 

 

 

 

It was depressing, Jensen thought later, as he put down the last of the few boxes and cases that Chris had loaded into the back of his truck. Jared had walked down the block to get them some beers for when they were done and Jeffrey wasn't home so it was just him and Chris, stood in the garage, looking around at the saddeningly small pile of stuff. They'd cleaned his room out in just under an hour and when his mother had come up to offer a hand he could see that she was holding back tears. It made him feel guilty, until he remembered his father's words in this room not so long ago. Then he knew that, despite his worries about Jared (worries that he knew he would overcome), he was doing the right thing. 

 

"Says something about me, doesn't it? That this is all I've got to show for myself."

 

Chris threw an arm around his friend's shoulders and pulled him in to a half-hug. "Your life's just starting, Jen. Trust me, what you've done so far won't be nothing compared to what's coming."

 

"You say that like it's a good thing, yet I can't help but feel worried by it."

 

Chris just laughed at that, squeezing Jensen's shoulder again. "You shouldn't be worried. I meant it in a good way. I know you're feeling all anxious about it right now, but I think this relationship is gonna be a turning point for you. You're already changing, man."

 

"Yeah, I.." Jensen stepped back and pulled up his shirt, tugged his jeans down slightly, seeing Chris's attention immediately focus on the bandage at his hip.

 

"Did you actually go ahead and get a tattoo?" Chris asked, sounding impressed.

 

"I can probably take this off now. You want to see it?"

 

"Wouldn't mind." And that was Jared's voice. Jensen hadn't even heard him come in and he started slightly, looking up. His misgivings had faded over the course of the afternoon and with the way Jared was looking at him now, he started to wonder why he'd been so concerned. The guy clearly cared for him, wanted him. He probably wouldn't do something if Jensen asked him not to. Still, it was that 'probably' that was a nagging worry. "Go on, let's see the finished deal."

 

Jensen nodded, and picked at the tape holding the bandage in place until he could get a grip on it. He peeled it off slowly, glad that the pain had died down completely now. The skin around the tattoo was blush-red and the ink was dark and looked odd right now, although Jensen had been assured that the colors would come through better once it had scabbed over and subsequently healed up. He hoped so. It would be very colorful when it was all healed. Across his hip was tattooed a pair of macaws, vibrant blues, reds, greens and yellows merging into one another inside detailed feathers. 

 

"Wow," Chris said, looking up as Jared came past him and rested his hand on Jensen's other hip, staring. "Maybe I should go," he murmured, as Jared kissed the back of Jensen's neck, making him tilt his head forward. "See you at school tomorrow, Jen."

 

As he left them alone, his words made Jensen's stomach sink. School, he thought. Doug. He ducked away from Jared, turned to face him with the best smile he could manage. "You want to help me unpack?" Like it was no big deal that he'd just stopped him again.

 

Jared sighed, looking put out. "Sure. I'll clear some space for you to stow your stuff in."

 

"Thanks," Jensen told him, and leaned in to give him a quick kiss on the mouth, more out of guilt than anything. Then he turned to the first of his cases and began pulling out the neatly folded clothes, stacking them on the sofa.

 

"Your clothes can go in that set of drawers there," Jared said, pointing as he began sorting through the clutter on the spare workbench. "Anything in them just leave to one side. On the floor or wherever. I can sort it tomorrow."

 

"Okay." Jensen opened the first drawer up and found it mostly empty, but stinking of dust. He pulled out the newspaper that had been used to line it and was unsurprised when it just about fell apart in his hands. He found an old towel that he'd packed and cleaned out the drawer with it before putting some of his clothes inside. The other drawers got the same treatment until all of his clothes were put away and there was a small pile of junk on the floor at his feet. One thing in particular had caught his eye, simply because it wasn't quite as dirty as everything else there, and he bent to pick it up. He turned to Jared, holding the polaroid camera out in front of him. "Hey, does this still work?"

 

Jared shrugged. "There are some batteries on that bench next to you if you want to try it."

 

Jensen rooted around for the batteries and loaded a couple into the camera when he found them. It switched on, which was a good sign, he guessed, although the display then informed him that there was no film in it. He made a mental note to go pick some up and stuffed the camera into one of the drawers amongst his socks and boxer shorts. He should probably ask Jared if it was okay for him to use it, but the other man didn't seem bothered and, besides, it had just been collecting dust before he'd found it. Jared had clearly forgotten he even owned it.

 

"Okay, you can use this bench for all your school stuff and since Jeffrey's not here you might as well go put your toothbrush away, but first..." Jared crossed the room and backed Jensen up against the set of drawers, pinning him there with an arm either side of him. "You gonna tell me what was wrong with you earlier?"

 

Jensen swallowed. "Nothing was wrong. I was just tired and...it just makes me jumpy."

 

Jared moved and cupped Jensen's cheek, turning his face so he was looking him in the eyes. "Truth."

 

"That is the truth," Jensen replied, desperately not breaking eye contact. "And I guess I was worried I'd see my Dad, which is stupid and-"

 

Jared cut him off, pushing his thumb over Jensen's lips. "You worried about Doug?" He asked, closing the gap between them and kissing Jensen's mouth around his thumb. Jensen closed his eyes, nodded. Maybe he understood after all. "Don't be. I told you, he hurts you? He won't know what hit him."

 

To that, Jensen badly wanted to say something, but he couldn't seem to find the nerve. Instead he stayed still as Jared kissed him further, as he moved his thumb out of the way so he could slide his tongue into Jensen's mouth. He felt Jared's fingers ghosting over the fresh tattoo and pulled back. "You like it?" He asked, looking down. Jared pressed his forehead to Jensen's, gazing down at the inked lines, at his fingers touching. He'd pushed Jensen's shirt up again and the cold air hitting his stomach made him shiver.

 

"Yeah. It's beautiful. Suits you." He nudged upwards, kissing Jensen again, moving so the other man could feel the hard press of his erection against his thigh. He was being patient, they both knew that, but Jensen still didn't want him to push this too far. Not yet. "You got any more homework to do?" Jared asked, his breath fanning warm over Jensen's mouth.

 

"No, I'm..I'm all done."

 

"Since Jeffrey ain't here then how about we go on in and chill out with the big TV? Grab a couple of those beers I got and just relax."

 

Jensen knew for a fact that relaxing would be the last thing he'd be able to do that night, but he agreed anyway and followed Jared inside. It was going to be a long night.


	14. Interlude: Jeffrey's date

  
Author's notes: **Three chapters posted today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

He hadn't been this nervous in years. 

 

Clearing his throat, Jeffrey let the black muscle car roll to a stop. He swallowed nervously and swiped a hand over his mouth and chin. Rough beard stubble rasped across his fingers. Shit, he should have shaved. His beard was black, silver in places, so his five o'clock shadow looked more like a week's worth of growth on other guys. He put both hands on the steering wheel and remained still, feeling the vibrations of the horses in the car engine, debating on turning around and leaving or actually going through with the date. The sound and feel of the engine was always calming to him. 

 

"You can do this, old man," he said to himself. "Get your ass in gear."

 

Taking a deep breath, Jeffrey turned off the car and hauled himself out. He made his way up the cracked sidewalk to Stevie's front door. Taking a deep breath, he raised his hand to knock and then stepped back as the door opened and Stevie smiled out at him. He gaped, but only for a moment before he collected himself and leaned forward to kiss her cheek. She blushed at the touch, the grin reaching her eyes as they parted again. 

 

"Hi," she said. "You're right on time."

 

"You sound surprised.."

 

Stevie laughed. "I guess I shouldn't be. You look good."

 

"And you," Jeffrey said, wondering when he got so eloquent. "I mean..you look better than good. Beautiful. Shall we.." He held his arm out in invitation. Stevie let him put his arm around her waist to walk her to the car, shutting the door firmly behind her. 

 

"Nice car," she said, as he opened her door for her.

 

Surprised, Jeffrey looked at her as he guided her down into the passenger seat. "Thank you," he grinned. "Not many women notice the car."

 

"Why not?" she asked. She touched the dashboard, moving as if she were petting the car. "Sure it looks a little banged up in places, but that just adds to the charm."

 

Those were some of the same exact words he'd used before when trying to convince Jared that the car was not a lost cause. It wasn't a piece of junk. It was a baby and it needed nurturing. He only smiled down at her, leaning against the car door. 

 

"I probably forgot to tell you that my Dad used to have a 1971 Mach One Fastback?"

 

Jeffrey's heart skipped a beat, not only because of the image she'd left him with, but also from those words coming from such a gorgeous mouth. He smiled brighter and feigned a dramatic swoon. "I'm kind of thinking of sending your Dad a huge-ass thank you card."

 

Stevie giggled, scrunching up her nose as she did. "For the car?"

 

"For you."

 

She blushed again and Jeffrey decided he liked making her do so. Her eyes shone when she did and she looked even more beautiful. Man, he thought. I am so done for.

 

"You want to get in the car?"

 

It was Jeffrey's turn to feel like an idiot and he closed her door quietly and went round to the driver's side. As he started up and pulled out, she asked him where he was planning to take her. "Well, that's kind of a surprise."

 

"I figured. Always a hope in asking, right?" She winked at him, patting his knee as he headed into town, which meant he spent the entire journey asking himself how in hell he got so lucky.

 

When he pulled up outside the restaurant he'd chosen, Stevie gave him a puzzled smile. "Really?" She asked. "You got us a table in here?"

 

Jeffrey shrugged, tucking his head down in embarrassment. "Yeah. I..the owner was a good friend a long time ago. And I helped on the building, so I get to call in a favor now and again."

 

"Nice," she said, nodding. "I'm dating a guy with connections."

 

"Not all of them ones you want to know about," he told her.

 

"I'm not entirely sure if you're joking or not..."

 

"Guess you'll find out if tonight goes well." Jeffrey looked across at her with a grin, curious.

 

He was thrilled that the comment hadn't put her off in any way. She seemed ready and willing to face anything and everything. He hadn't dated much in the years since Jared's mother had passed away, but he could tell that she was a breath of fresh air. 

 

Inside the restaurant, everyone was dressed in suits and ties, cocktail dresses and high heels. Stevie decided that she liked the place, but felt a moment of panic as she looked down at her attire. 

 

"Am I dressed okay?" she asked.

 

Jeffrey set a hand to the small of her back and motioned for her to follow the maître d'. "You're the prettiest one here," he assured her. "And I don't just say that because I want to know what's under the dress."

 

"Mister Morgan," she teased. He fell into step beside her, his hand still at her waist, guiding her. "We barely know each other."

 

He chuckled as they reached the table. Holding her chair out for her, he leaned down to speak into her ear in a low tone that only she would hear. "And I've already felt some of what's under there."

 

She laughed, watching him move to his own side of the table. "By pure accident."

 

"Maybe," he winked.

 

"You're being awful cheeky, Mister Morgan."

 

"Well, maybe I just can't help myself."

 

Stevie took the menu she was offered and put it flat on the table in front of her, folding her hands on top of it. Jeffrey tilted his head as she leaned forwards a little and quietly said, "Just how lucky are you hoping to get tonight, Jeffrey Dean?" There was the hint of a mischievous smile and he licked his suddenly dry lips at the thoughts that came. 

 

"Lucky as you let me," he replied. "Really, I'm considering myself lucky so far that you haven't slapped me yet."

 

"I never slap a date on an empty stomach," she told him, making him laugh. He was glad when she joined in.

 

 

 

 

"You want coffee?"

 

Stevie shook her head no. "I think anything else and I'll honestly burst out of this dress. And don't look at me like that."

 

"Like what?"

 

"You just got a dirty look in your eye when I said that. Are you usually this confident with your dates?"

 

"Not usually. But there's something about you." And it was true; there was. They'd spent the last two hours eating what was said to be the finest food in town and neither of them had been the slightest bit nervous, or too self-aware. Stevie was down to earth; she laughed loudly at Jeffrey's jokes and didn't care who looked round, she flirted just as much as he did, and she enjoyed her food. They'd also talked a hell of a lot about many different things. What got Stevie into teaching, and especially into English. Why Jeffrey owned a Harley Davidson, but barely rode it any more. He talked about Jared and she told him that the only companion she had at home was her cat. He found out that she was as much into cars as he was, which he had suspected from what she'd said about her father, and they talked at length about the merits of their past motors. 

 

In short, they had found themselves able to behave like old friends, without a hint of awkwardness between them. After the first course, Jeffrey had been wondering why in hell he had been so nervous about tonight.

 

"Something about me?" Stevie asked, cutting into his thoughts.

 

"Yes. You're...I don't know. I guess I didn't think this would be so easy. Considering how long it's been for me."

 

She nodded, agreeing. He had told her about Jared's mother and the fact that she had been the last woman he had really had a relationship with. "Can I ask you something?"

 

"Sure."

 

"If it's been so long for you, and you were so nervous about it, what made you ask me out in the first place?"

 

He shook his head at her. "I really wish I knew how to answer that," he returned. "People used to tell me that Sherri, Jared's Mom, would send me someone to help with raising him. Unfortunately, that never happened. Well, not when he was young anyway. I could still use some guidance I guess. Anyway, I used to think that they were crazy. Until I saw you. It's...it's cliched and it's really going to sound like B.S., but I really think she had something to do with me finding you. She would have loved the hell out of you."

 

Stevie smiled as she watched him reminisce. "You loved her a lot, didn't you?"

 

Jeffrey nodded, his eyes sparkling as he looked over at her and reached for his glass of wine. "I did," he agreed. "Very much."

 

"Think you could love someone that much again?"

 

He chuckled, swallowing a mouthful of wine. "I hope so," he said. "Otherwise, what are we doing here?"

 

"Good answer," she winked at him. 

 

He laughed again, looking down at his place setting. "Thank you," he returned. The waiter arrived then, clearing away their plates. Jeffrey rested his elbows on the table, hands folded in front of him, never taking his eyes off of Stevie while the waiter was there. He didn't speak, instead watching her watch him, an entire world of conversation in their smitten gazes. 

 

"Will there be any dessert tonight?" the waiter asked.

 

Jeffrey swore, just by the look in Stevie's eyes, that she had thought of the same answer, but neither of them voiced the words. Laughing softly, he arched his eyebrows at her. 

 

She shook her head and set a hand to her stomach. "I'm not sure I can even get up from this chair," she told the waiter. "He's going to have to roll me out to the car."

 

"I've got other plans for you anyway," Jeffrey told her, fishing a credit card out of his wallet and handing it to the waiter. 

 

"That sounds dangerously suggestive."

 

He couldn't escape the devilish laugh from escaping him.

 

 

 

 

"You're kidding."

 

He openly laughed at her expression. "No, I'm not."

 

"In this dress? After that meal?"

 

"You don't have to do much," he told her.

 

Stevie shook her head. "Oh, no. I just have to keep bending over and twisting."

 

"You don't want to do it?"

 

"Of course, I do," she smiled. "I just want to complain a bit first."

 

"Oh, okay," he chuckled. "Done?"

 

"I'm good, thanks."

 

Jeffrey got out of the car and headed to her side, opening the door and holding a hand out to her. He helped her from inside the vehicle, closing the door after her. "Shall we get our putters, Miss Kilworth?" he asked, offering him his arm.

 

Stevie looked around the miniature golf course and smiled. She took Jeffrey's arm and nodded her head with determination. "Absolutely, Mister Morgan." 

 

She couldn't remember the last time she had been mini-golfing. The set-up Jeffrey had taken her to had been something he'd had a hand in, he admitted. 

 

"Is there anything you can't do?" she asked, after the third hole.

 

He waved away her words, blushing. "Really, all I told them was to put in that waterfall there."

 

She leaned in closer to him to see where he was pointing to. The waterfall was enormous, hundreds and hundreds of gallons of water gushing over man-made rock. 

 

Jeffrey almost faltered when he felt the gentlest whisper of her hair brushing against his cheek. He looked down to see they shared the same space, and his heart pounded in his chest. He could smell her perfume and a slight hint of the shampoo she had used. The world seemed to slow to a stop for a moment when she looked up at him in return. Jeffrey didn't think that moments like this would exist for him any more; not after Sherri had died. But the kiss that followed was one such moment. Stevie seemed to melt at his touch even though, as he pulled away, he noticed she was shivering.

 

"Maybe it's too cold for this," he said, quietly touching her cheek.

 

"I'm fine. Besides, you already paid for-"

 

"Doesn't matter," Jeffrey told her. "I can think of other things I'd rather be doing."

 

"Oh.."

 

Jeffrey returned their putters and quickly led Stevie back to the car. She sat close to him, telling him to head to her place, and kept one hand on his knee throughout the drive.

 

 

 

Jeffrey pulled into Stevie's driveway and cut the engine and lights. Almost as soon as he had, Stevie had her seatbelt unfastened and was twisted around, holding his face in her hands as she kissed him. It was surprising and relaxing at once, as Jeffrey felt his heartrate quicken. He turned to make it easier, wrapping both arms around her neck and teasing his fingers into her hair.

 

"I really don't usually do this," she murmured against his mouth. "But you're..I don't know."

 

"So are you."

 

"I feel like I've known you for ages. It's just that... You want to come inside?"

 

"I don't know if I'll be able to help myself if I do," Jeffrey confessed.

 

"Maybe that's the idea," Stevie replied, winking at him as she moved back and opened her door. Jeffrey sat, momentarily lost for words as he watched her get out and head for her front door. She unlocked it and turned to look at the car, one hand on her hip as she beckoned him with the other to follow. "You coming?"

 

Jeffrey nodded, quickly getting out and closing up his car, locking it before joining Stevie in the hallway. She shut the door behind them and, as they wrapped their arms around one another and kissed, there was a soft meow and Jeffrey felt something winding around his ankles. He let go of Stevie, looking down and laughing.

 

"I'm sorry. She's kind of an attention-seeker." Stevie bent down and patted the cat away with one hand. "Go on, peabrain. Go curl up." The cat protested, but did as it was told. Stevie straightened and gave Jeffrey a soft smile. "Where were we?"

 

Jeffrey curled his fingers beneath her chin and pushed gently upward, the kiss more of a promise than a real touch. "What do you like?" He asked.

 

She blushed, ducking her head. "Whatever you want."

 

"God, whatever I want...you may well slap me."

 

"Try me."

 

He backed her against the wall then and pressed his body against hers, wanting her to feel the effect her words were having on him, what effect his own imagination was having on him. She didn't stop him as he pressed his mouth to hers, hard, and pushed his tongue inside. She encouraged him, lifting one leg between his and bending her knee to plant her foot against the wall. His breathing stuttered when she did that and he moved his hands, cupping her breasts in his palms and rubbing inward with his fingers. She moaned into his mouth, but still didn't stop him. He pulled away, reluctant, and looked down at his hands.

 

"I feel like...Like we shouldn't be doing this. I mean, it's a first date and you hardly know me, not really, and just. Damn. I have some pretty serious history going on, you know? I should go home and take you out again a few more times before I even think of..of.."

 

"Jeffrey?"

 

He looked up, meeting her eyes.

 

"We're both adults and if I didn't want you to take me up those stairs to my bedroom and ravish the hell out of me, I'd say so. But..I kinda do."

 

"It's...been a long time since I did any ravishing." 

 

"Maybe you should show me what you've remembered then," she told him, lifting her knee to press firmly between his legs. He sucked in a breath at the contact, then smiled devilishly.

 

"I'm sure I'll remember as we go along." He inched low enough to reach under the hem of her dress and slid his hands up her thighs. He planted kisses along the front line of buttons up to her neck and jaw, his hands tugging the dress aside enough for him to pull both her legs around his waist. 

 

Her back was against the wall, the pressure there holding her up as well as Jeffrey's hands around her ass. "You going to do me right here?" she asked, wrapping both arms around his neck. 

 

"I figured on carrying you up to your bed and doing it properly, Miss Dirtymouth..."

 

"Only dirty 'cause you're encouraging me. Do it.."

 

With a low, needful growl, Jeffrey pushed away from the door and awkwardly carried her up the stairs. He almost tripped at one point and Stevie gasped, her arms tightening on him. "Oh, my God, don't drop me," she laughed. He chuckled in her ear, slight beard stubble on his cheek brushing against her face. "I won't," he assured her. His legs burned from the exertion to get all the way up the stairs with her in his arms, but he felt valiant almost. As if he had earned her attention after that. He set her down upon the mattress, falling down with her and nearly sinking into both her and the soft mattress, her arms wrapped around his neck and he kissed her.

 

It had been so long. His hands shook as he reached up to unbutton the front of her dress. He didn't realize Stevie was watching him until she reached out to stop him. Her eyes, when he brought his gaze to hers, instantly calmed him. She silently told him she understood, and she wanted him, so there was nothing for him to worry about. He stayed where he was, his hands resting against the soft curves of her chest as she reached up and brought him back down into a kiss, so loving and tender that it made his chest constrict almost painfully for a moment. Stevie pushed her hands inside the sports jacket he was wearing and inched it off of his shoulders. And once the jacket had been shed, it was as if his nervousness went with it.

 

Little by little, warm skin was exposed. They alternated between making soft, gentle love to each other, to letting a slightly darker side form. Her fingers dusted lightly across his back one minute, and then paused to dimple the skin a moment later. Kisses were deep and breathy, biting and scraping. Jeffrey wanted to feel her body go loose, go rigid, and just plain go underneath him, atop him. He loved the feel of her legs around his waist, pulling him in deeper as he filled her as much as he could. He adored the sensation of her moving on top of him, coaxing him closer and closer to the edge.

 

It seemed like forever, and yet like they had just begun, when she finally completely let herself go. One hand rested at the back of her head, Jeffrey looked down at her as she came. Her neck was craned back and the column of her throat exposed, where he set his lips to both hear her voice and feel it vibrating against his mouth. Her nails clawed at his sides, and his fingers tightened on one of her hips, steadying her. It was his turn to let go, and he did so with his mouth pressed against her throat, his own voice vibrating against her skin.

 

Perfect. Everything was perfect as he came down from his euphoric high. His head pounded as blood rushed through his system. Their sweat smelled of a mix of her perfume and his cologne. Her legs twined around his in comfortable angles, and she was fine with his weight resting atop her, pinning her to the mattress. Flashing through his head was the need to whisper three words in her ear as he lay collapsed on top of her. He quickly dismissed them, telling himself that he was being ridiculous. 

 

Stevie slid her hand up his back, slippery with a thin layer of sweat. Her fingers eased into his short dark and graying locks, brushing gentle waves back away from his face. "Wow," she smiled.

 

Jeffrey finally raised his head and looked down at her. "Wow yourself."

 

She giggled and watched him roll off of her. He settled onto his back and heaved a great sigh, tugging the sheets up to his waist. When had they gotten under the covers? He couldn't remember. His arm slipped around her as she propped herself up on one elbow, slipped one of her legs between both of his. All he could think of was how perfectly she fit there. How right it felt.

 

Stevie gazed down at him, her blonde hair tousled and looking otherwise adorable. She liked how he looked up at her, his eyes sparkling in the lamplight. "You look at me like I'm a lot better than I really am," she told him.

 

"I do think you're pretty damn fantastic," he nodded. "And you're worth that thought."

 

She smiled and fluttered her eyelashes at the compliment, even though she adored it. "Are you glad you stayed?"

 

He nodded again. "Immensely."

 

 

 

 

It was dark when Jeffrey woke up again, his internal clock somehow knowing that he needed to go. He kissed Stevie's shoulder, waiting while she stirred. "Hey.." His voice was a low rumble in the quiet room.

 

"Mm..You have to go, right?" She asked, and yawned as she turned to face him.

 

"Yeah. I should get back before my boy wakes up. Got a school run to do."

 

"You just don't want him to know what a dirty stop-out you are," Stevie smiled, blinking sleepily.

 

"That too. I'll call you later. Maybe I can see you again tomo..tonight?"

 

"God, you better."

 

Jeffrey braced himself on one arm and kissed her one last time before he made his way around the bedroom, collecting his clothes together and getting dressed. "I'll..thank you. I'll see you later."

 

 

 

 

Thankfully the garage was quiet when Jeffrey walked into his home. He hadn't woken anyone. He'd been careful anyway, parking by the road rather than pulling right up onto the driveway, for fear the sound of the engine would wake Jared up and he'd have to explain why he was getting home at four in the morning. He locked up in darkness, not turning any lights on, and shrugged off his jacket, kicked off his shoes, before he collapsed on the sofa and slept through to his alarm.


	15. Chapter thirteen

  
Author's notes: **Three chapters posted today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

There it was. Monday. Staring him right in the face. Laying on his back, Jensen looked up at the garage ceiling, one hand resting on his T-shirt covered stomach. He sighed when the radio alarm clock went off. He'd been awake for hours already. Quietly, he reached over and turned the alarm off. Making sure not to awaken Jared, he climbed out of bed and got ready for school. He was out of the shower by the time Jeffrey was headed towards the bathroom. 

 

"Hey, Jensen."

 

"Hi," he said, trying to hide the sense of impending doom he felt in his voice. "You were out late."

 

"Yeah," Jeffrey nodded. "I, uh, had to go visit a friend. Hang out and I'll bring you to school."

 

Jensen nodded. "Okay," he agreed. "I'll scrounge for some breakfast."

 

"Cereal in the top cupboard, kiddo," Jeffrey said as he closed the bathroom door.

 

Jensen stood in the hallway, wanting to knock on the door and ask Jeffrey if they could talk. His stomach was churning; he really wasn't looking forward to food, and there was no way the day's lessons could fit in his head, what with everything milling about in there. When he heard the shower turn on, however, he decided that he would have to face the day on his own. Dad would never have helped him, anyway, if he'd ever had the nerve to tell him about Doug. He would have told him to face his problems head-on and learn to deal with them like a man. Jeffrey would surely say the same thing.

 

After half a bowl of cereal, Jensen went back into the garage and packed up his knapsack. Most of his books were stacked neatly on one corner of the workbench, but he couldn't find the copy of _Taming Of The Shrew_ he needed for English. He looked around on the floor, searching for any sign of it, but found nothing. Frowning, he opened some of the drawers there, wondering if it Jared had moved it or put it away without thinking. Finally, in the last drawer, he found it. Smiling, he grabbed the book and stopped short. Behind it, a little out of the way, was a gun.

 

It was the same gun that he had seen when Jared had first brought him here, Jeffrey's gun. He was suddenly curious as to how the gun would feel in his grasp. He picked it up, finding it to be heavier than he would have thought. He remembered seeing on movies how they checked to see if they were loaded, and looked for the lever to push. He located it, flipped open the revolver and saw that there were no bullets inside. He closed the chamber again, moving slowly so that the clicking wouldn't awaken Jared, still asleep up in the loft.

 

He knew better than to bring the gun to school. But it wasn't loaded. And Doug was a serious threat. Maybe he could just scare him with it. That way, Jared wouldn't feel obligated to beat Doug to a bloody pulp. Or worse, kill him.

 

Glancing around for a moment, Jensen made sure no one would see him slide the revolver into his knapsack. He was almost ready by the time Jeffrey emerged from the house, his hair still wet and his beard unshaven. He ran his fingers across the dark-and-graying stubble. "Almost the season for a beard, eh?"

 

Jensen smiled. "Keeps you warm in the winter?"

 

Chuckling, he nodded. "Sure does."

 

Jensen laughed with him, and then slung the pack over his shoulder. "Ready when you are."

 

"Give me a chance to grab my coffee and we're outta here."

 

Outside, Jeffrey's car was not in the driveway. Jensen stopped short and looked further, finding it on the curb. "Your car," he said, pointing at it.

 

"Yeah, I uh..." Jeffrey said, clearing his throat. "I moved it over there." 

 

"When?"

 

He scratched at the nape of his neck. "Oh, last...you know. When you guys were in bed."

 

Jensen made a face at him, confused. "Why?"

 

"Well, I just...I think it has a leak. I didn't want to get the drive all oily," he explained. "Come on, let's go. You're going to be late."

 

Jensen turned and looked at the cement driveway. It was marked with dirt, grease and oil, stained again and again from numerous oil changes and Jared's bikes. "Oh..." he said, blinking, "...kay."

 

 

 

 

"What's wrong, kiddo?"

 

Jensen realized he was staring. He turned and looked at Jeffrey. "What?"

 

"What's wrong?" he asked again. "You act like you don't want to go to school today."

 

"Oh," he swallowed. "Sorry."

 

Jeffrey reached out and touched him, rubbing at Jensen's shoulder. "You need a day to play hooky?"

 

The simple touch to his shoulder did more than Jeffrey realized. Jensen smiled and shook his head. "No," he chuckled. "Thank you though."

 

"Alright," he nodded. "As long as you're sure."

 

He nodded again. "I'm sure." Taking a deep breath, Jensen pushed open the car door and got out. Time to face the day. It wasn't going to help him, hiding in the car, as much as he wanted to stay there.

 

 

 

Day four, an even day. That meant Jensen had Phys Ed. He wasn't particularly excited about gym class. Mostly just because Doug could readily pound on Jensen, and Coach would take it as though it was just boys being boys.

 

But all through the morning classes, and even during P.E., Doug didn't come near him. Repeatedly, Jensen looked over at him, so sure he would be bloodied up before too long. Doug barely even looked at him. Maybe an occasional glance or two, but that was it. His lip was scabbed over, and a bruise had formed in the corner of his mouth. Jensen wondered how he had explained that one away. The anticipation was worse than if Doug had just belted him one. Still, Jensen wondered if going up to him and apologizing would help. He doubted it, but part of him still wanted to try.

 

He was mulling over what exactly to say to Doug, digging through the top shelf of his locker for his textbook for Math. He had forgotten it, and gotten a pass to leave class in order to retrieve it. In an instant, he was shoved up against the line of lockers, rushed at from behind. Pain flashed through his shoulders and chest. He winced as his cheek bounced off the edge of the shelf in his locker, his cheekbone already feeling bruised. Weight pressed against him, making his chest feel tight, like he couldn't take a full, deep breath.

 

"Hey, Jenny."

 

Jensen's eyes drifted closed for just a second. Doug. He would have known that voice anywhere. It had been part of his nightmares since Kindergarten. 

 

Using his body to pin Jensen up against the lockers, Doug spoke softly into the boy's ear. "What's wrong?" he asked. "Not so tough without your pretty little boyfriend?"

 

Clenching his jaw, Jensen didn't fight Doug. He let himself be pinned, even though everything within him wanted to buck against the bully and shake him off. And if he did, what then? Would he grab the gun from his knapsack and try to scare Doug? Jensen wondered if the overbearing ass would even flinch.

 

"And what about Sugar Daddy?" he continued. "They ain't here to save you now, are they?"

 

Jensen swallowed nervously. "Doug, come on, man."

 

"Come on? Come on?" he snarled. "Come on what, you piece of _shit_?"

 

Hands open and fingers splayed to hopefully show no sign of aggresion, Jensen frowned slightly. "Look, I'm sorry how things went down," he explained. 

 

Doug laughed in Jensen's ear. "Yeah, I bet you are, twink," he smiled. "And you know what? You're going to be a fuckload sorrier by the time I'm done with you."

 

"Freeman." 

 

Still keeping hold of Jensen, Doug turned and looked at the teacher that was standing in the empty hallway. 

 

"What's going on here? Shouldn't you be in class?"

 

"Yes, sir," he answered. He looked back at Jensen and smiled. With his free hand, he reached around and patted the side of Jensen's face, a little too hard. "See you later," he chuckled. " _Princess_."

 

Jensen felt Doug's weight leave him. He remained where he was for a moment, taking a deep breath. When his wits returned to him, he took another cleansing breath and pressed his hand to his cheekbone. He was going to have a bruise there, he could tell. And how was he going to explain that to Jared? 

 

_I'd fucking kill him if he touched you._

 

"Ackles, you alright?"

 

Jensen glanced back to the same teacher that had called Doug off. "Sir?"

 

"Are you _alright_?"

 

He nodded, swallowing the lump in his throat. "Yes, sir," he answered. 

 

"Get back to class then."

 

"Yes, sir."

 

 

 

 

Regardless of the fact that Doug had finally confronted him, or maybe because of it, Jensen didn't wait around for Jared or Jeffrey to show up. Usually, Chris walked to the bus stop with him, or gave him a lift in his truck, but he and Dani had already made plans. Jensen was on his own and he was glad. He needed some alone time. The skies were clear, but it was still cold, and he pulled his blazer firmly across his chest to keep warm. As he walked, he thought of Doug's threat. He knew it was going to take a lot to get the bully to back off, and he wasn't sure he had it within himself to solve the problem. His mind turned to Jared. He was overly fearful of what Jared would do if he was told of what Doug had said. Jensen decided to keep the threat quiet. He would have to figure out a way to deal with Doug on his own.

 

An old stone wall bordered the school property between the main building and where the busses were kept, about a quarter mile away. Jensen stopped along the wall and sat down, shivering. He thought of the gun, still sitting in his pack, and reached for it. It felt heavy in his hands, even though it wasn't loaded. He gripped it, put his finger over the trigger and wondered how bad the recoil would be when fired. 

 

Shaking his head, Jensen frowned. It had been stupid to bring the gun, loaded or not. If he'd been caught, he would have been expelled. And Dad would have been right. Sighing, Jensen put the gun back in his knapsack and started on his way back home, to Jared.

 

Jared had been taking advantage of the clear skies all day. The garage door was open, and the Suicycle was almost looking normal again. A couple of FedEx boxes sat nearby, making Jensen curious as to when Jared had had the time to order parts for the bike. 

 

"She's looking good," Jensen smiled, walking up the drive.

 

Jared half-turned. "Hey," he greeted. "Jeff didn't pick you up?"

 

"Nah, I caught the bus."

 

"Oh, sorry, man," he apologized, standing from his place on the cement driveway. "I thought he was going to get you today."

 

"It's okay."

 

Jared froze as he gazed over at Jensen.

 

Jensen squinted, smiling at Jared. "What?"

 

"What happened to your face?"

 

A sudden panic attack latched onto Jensen's throat. Shit, he thought. The bruise! He had forgotten to make up a legitimate excuse for the near-black eye that he now had. "Oh, that," he said, trying to buy some time. "It's nothing."

 

“Nothing, my ass," Jared said. "That's a shiner. Who gave it to you?"

 

"What?" Jensen asked. "Oh, no, it was from... I had P.E. today."

 

"And?"

 

"And, we played...dodgeball."

 

Jared watched Jensen nod his head, but he wasn't convinced. "A bunch of high school jock seniors played dodgeball?"

 

"Yeah," he agreed. "Sure, why not?"

 

He shook his head. "You're full of shit."

 

"I am not," he returned, sounding offended. "I got popped in the face with one of the balls."

 

Jared still didn't believe him. "By who?"

 

Sighing, Jensen quickly picked a name from the gym class roster. "Gregory Billings," he answered. "Okay?"

 

Quietly, Jared eyed him. "Not Doug?"

 

_Success_. "Not Doug."

 

Sighing, Jared turned towards the array of tools that were spread out on the blanket underneath the wheels of the Suicycle. "Alright," he said. "Well, help me pick up and we'll close up the garage and have hot boy sex."

 

Jensen smiled brightly and shook his head. "I have homework," he replied.

 

Putting up the kickstand on the bike, Jared pushed it into the garage, parking it beside the old Ducati. "Fine," he nodded. "We'll watch some lame television."

 

Jensen helped him move the stuff into the garage, dragging the blanket inside and leaving it beside the motorbike, all the tools and little odds and ends still settled upon it. "No, I'm going to do my homework, first."

 

"Homework?" Jared laughed. There was the inability to speak for a second or two as the garage door was pulled shut, clattering and groaning the whole way. "Come on," he encouraged after it was quiet again. "Watch a little TV for awhile and I'll help you with your homework later."

 

It was Jensen's turn to laugh. "No, you won't," he chuckled. 

 

Jared bit at his bottom lip and playfully lunged towards Jensen, grabbing for his knapsack. He laughed when Jensen ducked out of the way, and made a frail attempt at shoving Jared back. Jensen voiced a protest, but it was feigned harsh words amidst a hearty laugh.

 

"Get off me," he said.

 

The words only fueled Jared's attempts to get the knapsack away from Jensen. He tried one more time, this time successful in knocking it off of the man's shoulder. The bag clattered to the floor, thick history books and english notes tumbling from within. They didn't catch Jared's attention as much as the pistol that rolled out from inside the bag. Smiles faded and all playfulness stopped.

 

Jensen felt his heart pound in his chest. He suddenly realized that he was more fearful now than when he faced Doug, watching Jared push him aside and start towards the gun. "Jared..."

 

Jared looked back at him, directly into Jensen's eyes, before he leaned down and picked up the gun. "What the hell is this?"

 

He held his hands up in the air in surrender. "I didn't use it," Jensen said.

 

Furious, Jared clenched his jaw and stepped closer, his fingers curled around the gun. "What the fuck is this for?"

 

Jensen winced. Jared's voice was much louder than before. If Jeffrey had been home, he would have come out into the garage to see what the problem was. "Jared, it's not even loaded," he told him. "Calm down."

 

"Fuck you, calm down," he snarled back. "Why are you carrying a gun? What -- to _school_? Is it because of that asshole on the football team? He's the one that gave you that shiner, isn't he?"

 

"Jared."

 

"You lied to me," he reminded him. "It wasn't from dodgeball and Gregory what-the-fuck-ever, was it?"

 

Jensen sighed, a frown darkening his face for a moment. "No," he answered. "I got it from Doug when he pushed me up against the lockers."

 

He raised the pistol in his palm, flashing it at Jensen. "And you brought this, _why_?"

 

Jensen almost sighed a second time. "Because," he began, pausing long enough to look away, searching for the right words. "Because I was afraid."

 

"Bullshit," Jared snapped. "Doug is a panty-waste. You could down him in a heartbeat if you wanted to. Why are you afraid of him?"

 

"It's not _him_ I'm afraid of."

 

It took a moment for Jensen's words to sink in. Jared stared at him, stunned. His fury dissipated, and the tension in his shoulders seemed to lessen. He wasn't looming over Jensen like he had been a moment ago. Instead, he took a step back, hurt in his eyes. "You're afraid of me?"

 

Jensen frowned, raking his fingers through his hair. "I should feel honored that you fought for me," he said. "I know. But you scared me."

 

"Because I punched his lights out?"

 

"Because of what you said."

 

"What did I say?"

 

"That you would have killed him."

 

Jared honestly didn't see the problem with what he had said, and it showed in his expression. "I would have!"

 

Jensen growled and reached out to him. He shoved Jared back with one hand, just barely knocking him off balance. "I don't want you to hurt Doug like that. Not just for me. I know you think you're doing it 'cause you care, but if you get in trouble for anything involving him then I'm gonna feel guilty for not being able to stand up to him myself." 

 

Jared listened, his jaw still set in anger.

 

"Aside from that, you'd probably go too far and get in real trouble and then I wouldn't see you again," Jensen continued. "So just...just promise me. Okay?"

 

Looking down at the gun in his hand, Jared thought quietly to himself. His anger wasn't nearly as potent as it was before. Jensen had a point. "So what the hell am I supposed to do?" he asked. "Stand back and watch him kick your ass?"

 

" _Yes_ ," Jensen said. "Let me fight my own fights."

 

Jared shook his head. He walked over to the work bench and put the gun back in the drawer where it had been before. "Fine," he said, slamming the drawer closed. 

 

Sighing, Jensen noticed that Jared kept his back to him, resting his hands atop the work bench. "Doesn't mean I couldn't use some coaching though," he said.

 

Jared turned to face him. "Teach you some moves, you mean?"

 

"Why not?"

 

In the momentary silence, Jared looked up and down Jensen's body, then back ino his eyes. "I won't go easy on you," he told him. 

 

"That would kind of defeat the purpose."

 

Before he could even finish his sentence, Jared lashed out at him. Jensen had enough time to duck somewhat, leaving Jared's hand to skip off the top of his head. It was an open-fisted hand; Jared was taking it easy on him, regardless of what he had said. Still, Jensen knew that the training had started. Laughing, he backed away from Jared. "Oh, ho ho!"

 

"Where you going?" Jared smiled. "Don't walk away. That means you're afraid. Pussy."

 

Jensen still laughed, moving around the cluttered garage. He was relieved that Jared had taken the news of his fear so well, and thankful that the man was going to help him work through it. "I _am_ afraid," he returned. "You'll kill me."

 

"No I won't, come here."

 

Jensen saw Jared lunging at him, but he didn't have the time, nor space, to react. He had time enough to cry out before he felt Jared's arms envelop him. He heard Jared laugh at him, felt his long arms twining around him in an impossible knot. "No, let go!"

 

"Get out of it," Jared told him.

 

"How is this helping?" He heard the sound of fabric barely tearing and froze. "No, no, no! Hold on, you're going to tear my uniform."

 

"Take it off then."

 

"Kind of hard to when you're attached to me."

 

Jared chuckled and finally let go of Jensen. He didn't back away, instead sticking close by to watch Jensen remove his blazer and unbutton the shirt and pull it from his shoulders. "You're kinda sexy when you take your shirt off like that," he grinned.

 

"You're kinda creepy when you watch like that," Jensen teased, tossing the shirt to the side. He watched it land over the back of the sofa and then looked back at Jared. Before the wily man could grab hold of him, he took off like a shot, trying to put some distance between them. Somehow the lesson in tactical fighting had become nothing more than a playful game of tag. Some things were knocked off the box columns that were precariously towering in the garage. Jared set up boundaries as their path twisted around the garage; his main rule was to keep away from where the bikes were, for there were delicate parts that could easily break. Jensen respected the boundaries and thought he had plenty of room until he made a wrong turn and found himself face to face with Jared. Almost squealing like a girl, Jensen turned and tried to scramble away, but he felt a hand close around the waist of his pants.

 

Jared laughed, gaining enough leverage to pull Jensen back towards him.

 

"Augh, no!"

 

Still keeping hold of Jensen's belt, Jared chuckled and swivelled him around to face him. Jensen's shoes scraped along the cement garage floor as he skidded closer to Jared. "I win."

 

Jared laughed in response, curling his fingers around Jared's wrist and trying to dislodge his hold. 

 

Time seemed to slow. They were suddenly acutely aware of each other's breathing, of the pulse that throbbed in one another's throat. Jensen noticed how Jared's hair fell in front of his eyes, and Jared was mesmerized by Jensen's eyes, rimmed with long, dark lashes. Still with a handful of trouser and belt, Jared leaned in just slightly, Jensen following his example. Their foreheads bumped together just slightly before their lips met. Jensen had to crane his neck back just slightly, to Jared's height. 

 

He didn't know how the lesson had turned into this, but when he felt Jared let go of him to slide his hands along Jensen's jaw and then back into his hair, he suddenly didn't care. Jared's tongue was warm and tasted like peppermint gum. Jensen smelled like linen and cologne, and his hands were slightly chilled as they rested at Jared's hips.

 

Jared couldn't help but wonder how far Jensen would let this go; he couldn't help it. He wanted the nineteen-year-old more than he should, really. Blindly, he directed Jensen to the ladder that led to the bed on the second level. 

 

Jensen bumped into it and remained there for a moment. He had a feeling he knew what Jared wanted, but he was still timid. Jared was getting insistant too, teeth as well as tongue being added into the kiss. Jensen wanted to give into him; he was so close to agreeing. His heart nearly skipped out of his chest when he felt Jared push his arms up straight, pinning his wrists against the rungs of the ladder. 

 

Just as he was about to give in to Jared and pull him up the ladder, there was the rumble of an engine beyond the garage door. The engine cut out and then there was the familiar hinge squeak to Jeffrey's car door. Jared broke the kiss and looked down at Jensen, sighing softly. He skated his fingers down Jensen's arms, purposefully grazing the pads of his fingers over both of Jensen's nipples. "We need to get our own place," he mumbled.


	16. Chapter fourteen

  
Author's notes: **Three chapters posted today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

It had been an excruciating day. Jeffrey wanted nothing more than a beer, a pizza, and a quiet night at home. He let himself into the house and moved out to the garage. Jared and Jensen were seated upon the sofa, the old black and white television blaring in front of them. Jared's arm was draped along the back of the sofa and Jensen was settled close. Regardless of their calm demeanor, Jeffrey saw that their hair was tousled, they were both shirtless, and the garage was a bit more of a mess than usual. 

 

"Hey, you two," he called over the sound of the television. "It's pizza night, I'm bushed."

 

Jared didn't look at him, but raised a bottle of beer to him instead. 

 

Nodding his head, Jeffrey eyed them a moment more. "Jensen, did you get your homework done?"

 

Jensen looked over at Jared. "No, sir, not yet," he answered. 

 

"You know, you guys should save that energy," he continued. "Jensen still has quite a few more months of homework and tests, and those grades are important for him."

 

Jared squeezed his eyes shut and bounced the mouth of the beer bottle upon his forehead. He sighed as he listened to Jeffrey step back into the kitchen, closing the door behind him. 

 

 

 

 

It was quiet in the garage, the sounds of crickets chirping just outside the walls attempting to lull Jensen to sleep. An occasional sound of traffic from the highway filtered through, and someone down the street was playing their music too loudly. The bass melded with the crickets and seemed to be working together. Jensen's eyes felt heavy. He blinked slowly as he lay under the covers, Jared stretched out beside him. Jensen's one arm rested over Jared's stomach, his thumb stroking back and forth over the soft skin there.

 

In a T-shirt and shorts, Jensen was comfortable, even though the night air was damp and chilled. Jared, always stark naked now when he went to bed, was like a furnace, generating more heat than either of them really needed. By morning they'd both be sticky with sweat, their limbs entangled.

 

"Jared?"

 

"Hm?"

 

"I'm sorry about before. About the gun."

 

Blindly, Jared reached out to him, setting a hand upon Jensen's clothed hip. "It's okay."

 

Taking a deep breath, Jensen propped his head up on one elbow. His gaze fell to Jared's naked chest, seeing just a hint of moonlight glinting off of the dogtags that the man sometimes wore. "I think Jeff's right."

 

Finally, Jared opened his eyes and turned his head to look over at Jensen. "About what?"

 

His hand involuntarily moved lower, palm laying flat against Jared's belly. "We should wait."

 

Smiling, Jared set his hand upon Jensen's, inching it lower under the covers. "Wait for what?"

 

Jensen returned the grin, feeling crinkly hair tickle his fingers. "Before we...you know." He rubbed gently against soft, hot flesh.

 

Jared chuckled at him, his legs creeping open a bit wider. "Before we have hot pig sex?"

 

" _Pig_ sex?" he laughed.

 

"Yeah, you know," he said, pulling Jensen in closer. He placed a kiss to Jensen's ear and spoke softly, his voice husky. "Hot, wet, and filthy. Rooting around, and doing what just feels good."

 

Jensen's smile was gone, his eyes already drifted shut from the feel of chills gathering upon his skin. Jared had a way of immediately finding a weak spot and exploiting it. And right now, that little spot behind Jensen's ear that he was tonguing was making the world seem to slow. Jensen responded by stroking the length of Jared's cock. 

 

Jared reached up and held Jensen's head in place so that he could scrape his teeth over the spot behind Jensen's ear. He was rewarded by a slight gasp and moan. Jared smiled against his skin, chuckling gently. "Are you still afraid of me?"

 

Jensen pulled away enough to look down at him, eyes dilated and dark. "No," he answered. He kept up the stroking rhythm he had established and gazed into Jared's eyes. "I want to do something for you."

 

Leaning back against the pillows, Jared smiled. "Like what?"

 

Jensen sat up and put one leg over both of Jared's, straddling him. "Like make you feel good," he returned, moving his hand slowly and easily.

 

Jared watched him, tucking one arm underneath his head. He took calm, even breaths, closing his eyes to the feel of Jensen's hands upon him. It seemed like it had been awhile since he'd felt something so good. He shifted his hips just slightly and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

 

Anxiously, Jensen watched Jared's expression. It didn't really change much, even though he was touching him, stroking and rubbing. He wanted to please Jared in more than just one way. Nervously, he leaned down and placed careful, timid kisses upon the man's belly. He attempted to move lower, but his stomach clenched out of fear. He paused, his erratic breathing now due more to nerves than pleasure. Disappointed in himself, Jensen frowned and crawled back up Jared's body. He hovered over him and looked down into the man's eyes. "I can't, I'm sorry," he apologized.

 

Since learning about Jensen, Jared understood where the timidness came from. He didn't hold anything against him, but he wished that Jensen would stop being so hard on himself. Reaching up, he took the young man's face in his hands and shook his head. "It's okay," he assured him. 

 

Jensen closed his eyes when Jared pulled him in for a kiss, warm and wet. When the embrace was broken, Jensen looked down at him, still hovering on all fours. 

 

"I want to show you something," Jared almost whispered. Quickly, he tugged Jensen's shirt up over his head, tossing it down to the floor beside the bed. He hooked his fingers into the elastic waist of the gym shorts Jensen wore, inching them down as far as he could. "Come on."

 

Jensen was insecure and nervous about Jared seeing him naked, no matter how close they were. Swallowing, he took solace in the fact that there were only two windows in the garage, and neither one faced the streetlight out in front of the house, nor were they in the path of the moon. The light was dim at best. Jared wouldn't see much. 

 

Once the shorts had been shed, Jensen sat back, resting on his knees, Jared still underneath him. "What?" he asked, watching the man lean over to the old blue milk crates used as a bedside table. From a dusty shoebox, Jared produced a tube that Jensen could only just read as KY JELLY. His heart pounded faster and he shook his head. "No, wait a minute, Jared," he said.

 

"It's okay," he returned, squeezing some of the jelly out onto his fingers. He sat up, the dogtags jangling as he moved. "Calm down. I just want to show you something. Okay? I'm not going to do anything you don't want me to. I promise." With his two slick fingers held up, Jared urged Jensen to straighten, kneeling high on his knees and giving him more room. With his lips brushing Jensen's stomach, Jared spoke gently. "Relax," he said. "I won't hurt you."

 

Jensen watched, setting his hands upon Jared's head, fingers threading through the dark waves of hair there. Jared's open-mouthed kisses to his stomach were calming, until he felt the man's hands slip between his legs and around to his backside. The two slick fingers started at the top of the cleft there and quickly moved downwards until they found just the right spot. Jensen gasped and pushed against Jared's shoulders, suddenly wanting him to stop. He heard Jared hush him, assuring him that all was well.

 

Jensen had no alternative but to close his eyes when he felt the first slow, tentative circle around the ring of muscle that Jared had managed to find. He didn't stop or give Jensen any time to breathe. Instead, he kept circling, finding a rhythm just as Jensen had earlier. Grunting out a strangled moan, Jensen arched back into Jared's hand, his breathing now harsher for all the right reasons. Jared's two slick fingers kept circling, the most perfect feeling he'd ever experienced. 

 

Jared glanced up at Jensen. It was hard to see him well in the semi-darkness, but he could vaguely see the rapture on the young man's face, could feel the trembling of taut muscle and shuddering breaths. Smiling, he reached up with his free hand and made a soft, playful circle around one of Jensen's nipples. "You should get rings," he said softly.

 

Looking down at him, Jensen's eyes glittered in the low light. The lids slowly closed as he concentrated more on Jared's fingers than his voice. He slid the palms of his hands up over Jared's muscled shoulders, his fingers brushing the shotbead necklace to the dogtags. He found the flat, metal medallions and clutched them in one hand, pulling Jared up to him. He could feel the rough letters punched into the tags, but couldn't recall if he had ever looked to see what they said. He leaned down enough to rest his forehead upon Jared's, the fingers of his free hand slipping through the man's dark locks. "What are you doing to me?" he breathed, his voice scratchy and fading in and out.

 

Carefully, Jared let the tip of one finger push inside the ring of muscle. Jensen straightened again, and Jared was rewarded with a gasp and some sort of erotic sound made in the back of Jensen's throat. The man's fingers again raked through Jared's hair, making fists at either side of his head - not enough to pull and hurt, but just enough to hold onto him with. After another few wet circles, Jared pushed both fingers inside of him, slowly but firmly until Jensen cried out, the howl cut short when he bit at his lip in an attempt to not awaken Jeffrey in the house. With his free hand, Jared stroked Jensen's cock, pushing him closer to the edge of orgasm. He set up somewhat of an awkward rhythm, stroking and pushing deep inside until Jensen curled around him.

 

Jensen couldn't help himself. He bit down on Jared's shoulder enough to make the man hiss in pain, and held onto him for dear life as he came hard. He had hoped to hold off until Jared got something to mop up the warmth that would spill from him, but it was impossible. His body rocked with tremors, his mouth open and grunting moans escaping him with each breath he exhaled. His head pounded as blood rushed back through his system. Breathing heavily, Jensen worked hard to raise himself up off of Jared. He looked down at him, just barely able to see the man's chest glistening with more than just sweat.

 

"Sorry," Jensen managed.

 

Jared smiled. "If I'd cared, I would have done something to stop it earlier." He leaned back against the mattress, keeping eye contact with Jensen. He set his palms flat against his own chest and belly, grazing them over his skin and the wetness there. When he'd gathered up enough slickness to his palms, he slid his hands down to his own erection. 

 

Jensen's heart pounded harder once more. Jared was going to kill him. He watched for only a moment as Jared touched himself, until he reached out to help. Their fingers intertwined, warm and slick, sticky and chilled all at the same time. He might not have been able to take Jared into his mouth before, but he remembered the taste of metal and skin and had a desire to taste it again. He bent down until his mouth had captured one of the nipple rings, teeth gently holding the skin in place as his tongue worked feverishly. 

 

Jared closed his eyes, his back arched as he leaned into Jensen's mouth. He was thrilled to feel Jensen suckle at his nipple, teeth clacking against the ring. The pull was enough to give him chills, and when he felt Jensen's teeth scrape against the engorged flesh, a moan escaped him. 

 

The sound of Jared's ecstasy pushed Jensen further. He reached up with one sticky hand to the other nipple ring and matched his tongue's movements with his fingers. He pulled a little too hard, and thought he was going to hear a painful protest, but instead, Jared moaned and breathily asked him to do it again. With more teeth, a few extra tugs on the rings, and a number of good hard strokes, Jared came, one hand clamped down on the nape of Jensen's neck, the other more southward, fingers interlocked with Jensen's.

 

Insistently, Jared pulled Jensen up into a rough, breathy kiss, wrapping his arms around him. Jensen let him, almost sinking into Jared as he lay sprawled out in the bed. Their chests heaved against one another's, sticky and smelling like sex. Jared's hands rested at Jensen's backside, formed to the muscle there. The kiss began to wind down, leaving both of them sated, relaxed. Jensen flopped over onto his own side of the bed again, limbs sprawled out. 

 

"We should go take a shower," he sighed.

 

Jared leaned over the edge of the bed, searching blindly for the clothes he had left on the floor with one hand. "We do, and Jeff's gonna know we didn't take his advice." He began to wipe off his chest, belly, and lower with his sleeveless tee. "This'll have to do for now."

 

Jensen did the same, then handed the shirt back, watching Jared drop it to the floor again. It was only a few seconds later that he was asleep, almost snoring as he lay sprawled out on his back. Jared rested there beside him, noticing that Jensen had forgotten to set his alarm clock. He propped himself up on an elbow and leaned over, doing his best not to wake the teen up. He switched on the alarm, and as he was getting ready to settle back down into bed, he paused, unable to take his eyes off of Jensen. 

 

He stayed like that for a long time, his eyes taking in as many details as he could. The line of Jensen's jaw, the curve of his chin, his long, straight nose, the eyelashes that seemed to go on forever, the ever-so-slight bump on his forehead that Jared once remembered hearing someone say denoted high intelligence. For a moment, Jared disbelieved such an old wives' tale, feeling that if it was true, Jensen would never have left his perfect life before, to be with him. He tried to think of where he would be right this very moment if Jensen wasn't there with him. Probably trying to score some pot, he thought sullenly. Robbing another gas station. Doing one thing or another to fuck up my life again. Since meeting Jensen, he hadn't even wanted to think about doing such things. 

 

Reaching out, Jared brushed the pads of his fingers along the column of Jensen's throat, pausing at the hollow that was at the base. His thumb fit perfectly there. The skin was soft, indenting and flattening back out just slightly as Jensen breathed. Still mulling over the thoughts in his head, Jared's gaze fell to the tattoo on Jensen's hip. He'd admitted that it was itching earlier, but lotion had been soothing it somewhat. He realized, staring at the tattoo, that they were both changing. 

 

And, for once, Jared wasn't scared of the idea.


	17. Chapter fifteen

Jensen woke up warm and comfortable, wrapped tight in Jared's arms. He dragged one arm up underneath the covers and quietly traced his fingers round the muscles of Jared's shoulder, the movement pulling him from sleep. Jared blinked, then leaned forward and took Jensen's mouth in a dry kiss. The press of his body, the reminder that they were both naked, woke Jensen up even more and he turned away from the kiss, groaning.

 

"Maybe I should get dressed. I have school."

 

Jared dipped his head and blew a raspberry against Jensen's shoulder, showing him exactly what he thought of that idea.

 

"Yeah, I know. You want me to stay here all day and miss out on all those tests and homework assignments. It's thanksgiving in two days, Jay. You get to keep me here for a whole four days then."

 

"Hmm. I'll hold you to that."

 

"You going to let me go now?"

 

"Too early." Jared checked the alarm clock beside the bed. "You got a half hour before that alarm even goes off." 

 

Jensen sighed, relaxing. Completely unprepared for what Jared did next. He curled into himself as Jared pulled the covers back in a single flourish and tossed them towards the end of the bed. "Dammit, Jay! It's _cold_!"

 

Jared just chuckled at him, getting onto his knees and then his feet, standing on the mattress with his feet spread wide as he looked down at Jensen who was making a desperate attempt to cover himself up. Jensen stared up at him, his eyes drawn down by the sight of Jared's cock, heavy against his thigh. Jensen's cheeks flamed red and he looked away, rolling over to reach over the edge of the mattress and attempt to find some clothes.

 

"Why're you so worried about me seeing?" Jared asked, amused. "Considering where my hands were last night. God, I can imagine it anyway. You know you're incredible, right?" He dropped to his knees again, crawled over and lifted one leg over Jensen, rolled him onto his back and pinned him down. Jensen's right hand trapped between his legs by Jared's weight. "You don't mind looking at me, but you won't let me look at you?"

 

"I'm-"

 

"You got nothing to be ashamed of, believe you me." He reached down and gripped Jensen's hand, hard, lifting it free. Looked down and licked his lips. "Everything about you is just... _beautiful_."

 

Jensen didn't believe that at all. Jared had to have had way better than him. He shook his head, reaching up both hands and pushing them against Jared's chest until he gave in and moved, sitting up against the pillows on his side of the bed. Jensen got up and grabbed the closest thing to hand at the side of the bed - a pair of red swim-trunks - and pulled them on. He would have dug around for his pants, but Jared took him by the arm then and pulled him back down to the bed. Kissed him and reminded him that he still had plenty of time. 

 

"I mean it. Stay here until that alarm goes off. Let me look at you." When he ran his hands lightly over Jensen's stomach, the younger man protested.

 

"Thought you were just gonna look?"

 

"I can't look with just my eyes. Gotta touch, too. Dammit, Jensen, you're fucking gorgeous," Jared told him, the touch of his hands like a whisper on Jensen's skin. "Don't you believe me?" 

 

The truth was, Jensen didn't. He was okay, he guessed. Normal looking. Definitely no prize to write home about. Doug had taunted him, called him 'pretty boy' so often that the words had lost their meaning; they were no longer any kind of compliment. And here was Jared telling him the same thing. Jensen turned onto his side, away from Jared, the thoughts of Doug having sobered him. He felt like he was being unfair, comparing the two of them. Jared didn't know what he was saying. He felt a hand on his hip, but didn't look round.

 

"Hey. Did I do something wrong?"

 

"No. It.. I just.."

 

"Every time I try and compliment you it's like you don't want to know," Jared interrupted. "Is it gonna take more sex to make you let yourself go again? Or is it just in the mornings when you're all uptight?"

 

"I'm not uptight!" Jensen protested.

 

"Good," Jared answered, pushing him over onto his stomach. "Twenty-five minutes." Jensen shuddered as Jared smoothed one hand over his back, letting his fingers slide under the loose elastic of the old trunks. He bit his lip, let his eyes fall closed. He felt a kiss against his nape and another, lower on his back. Jared was shifting around, getting ready to do something. His swim trunks were pulled lower and he almost knew to expect it, but still jumped when Jared scraped his teeth over the top of Jensen's ass. He soothed the scratch of it with his tongue, licking into the dip at the base of Jensen's spine and tonguing further down. Jensen felt his muscles straining as he pressed down into the mattress with his feet and Jared helped out by putting one hand underneath his stomach and lifting him up. It made it easier for him to reach. "You taste fucking incredible," Jared murmured, his voice muffled.

 

Jensen couldn't find the presence of mind to answer. The pressure of Jared's tongue was making his heart jump and he was finding it hard to keep his breathing even. He grabbed the pillow beneath his head and bit into it, lifting his ass up more. Jared's chest was against his back, both becoming slick with sweat. The hand on his stomach moved lower, pushing the trunks down at the front too. Jensen held himself up with one hand and reached down with the other, batting Jared away so he could take his cock into his hand. He moved his thumb over the tip and then dragged his hand down its length, shivering. With both hands free, Jared began jacking his own cock with one and held Jensen open with the other, his tongue delving deeper with each stroke.

 

He stayed there for what felt like a long time, even after he had brought himself off, as if he was waiting for Jensen to lose it before he moved. The stimulation of Jared's tongue coupled with Jensen's desperate jerking off, his need for release, both were enough to finish him off. Jensen tried to stop it, couldn't, and came all over the sheets underneath him. He heard and felt Jared laughing against him and then he was rolled over onto his back and Jared was moving, turning so that he and Jensen were face to face. 

 

He half-bit, half-licked at Jensen's throat, waiting for the younger man to calm down, then lifted his head to look down at him and asked him if he was okay.

 

Jensen nodded, licked his lips. His hands were down by his sides, his fingers twitching as though the last of his orgasm was still lingering in them.

 

"You're so beautiful when you come," Jared whispered, tracing around the muscles of Jensen's stomach. He dragged his fingers down, scratching them through crisp hairs that were coated in sweat and semen.

 

"Mm... Don't," Jensen warned. "Please.."

 

"Don't what? Tease?"

 

"No, don't.. Don't say that.." They both started as the alarm kicked in then, playing some rock song that Jensen couldn't quite recognize. It stirred him into action and he tugged the trunks back up and swung his legs over the side of the bed, sitting up and looking around for his uniform.

 

"Are you ever going to believe what I say to you?"

 

"Sure, I believe you. I just really need to get ready for school."

 

"School. Of course." Jared blew out a sharp breath. "All right. Tell Jeff to go on ahead. I'll drop you at school on his bike since I need to head out to Harry's and pick up a little something for the Suicycle. She's nearly finished."

 

"You're going to..on the Harley?"

 

Jared shrugged. "Yeah. I picked you up on it before now, what's the big deal?"

 

Jensen didn't really answer, just mumbled something incoherent and headed for the ladder. It was different getting dropped at school by Jeff in the car. The car wasn't too out of the ordinary. It wasn't too noticeable. The Harley would draw attention to him and school was much busier in the morning when he arrived than it had been that day Jared had picked him up. He just hoped that certain people would already be in class by the time he got there.

 

 

 

 

Naturally, he wasn't going to be that lucky. The first bell hadn't rung yet and most of the school buses were just arriving as Jared pulled up outside the school, the noise of the Harley's engine making everyone look round. Jensen was almost tempted to tell him to keep on going so he wouldn't have to get off, but he was already in his uniform which was enough of a giveaway that he was a student here. Jensen took a deep breath and got off the bike, then took his helmet off, handing it to Jared so he could fix it to the bike. He heard people nearby start talking and tried his best to ignore them as Jared flipped his visor up.

 

"I'll pick you up later, okay? Jeff said he was going out after he finishes work and won't be back 'til late, so maybe we can go into town and rent a movie out or something."

 

"Sure. See you later." Jensen didn't know if Jared was hoping for anything more, but all he got was a friendly smack to the shoulder before Jensen turned and hurried towards the school entrance, trying not to catch anyone's eye on the way.

 

 

 

 

By lunchtime the rumor was all the way round the school. Jensen felt sure that Doug had had something to do with certain parts of it, because now everybody was convinced that he'd been dropped off by his big gay sugar daddy. Just the thought of such a description being applied to Jared was enough to make him laugh out loud, which he did the moment Chris told him what was being said. Then the humor of it wore off and he put his head in his hands and groaned.

 

"C'mon, man," Chris said, patting his shoulder. "Could be worse."

 

"How? How could this be any worse?"

 

"He could've kissed you goodbye."

 

"Yeah, right. He'd have had to catch me first."

 

"Are you and him okay now? I mean..on Sunday you just seemed kinda-"

 

"Oh, we worked that out," Jensen interrupted. "Believe me."

 

Chris sat down opposite him and dropped his lunch tray on the table, leaning across it with a huge grin. "Did you have sex last night, Jen?"

 

Blushing, Jensen looked around quickly, praying nobody had heard his friend. "Would you keep it down?" He hissed.

 

"Ho-ly shit. You did, didn't you? You and Jared, you..What's it like?"

 

"Are you kidding me? Chris, I'm not going to sit here talking about this with you! Talk about something else, for Chrissake."

 

"Like what? This is new to me, okay? You talked it up so much it'd be a shame not to hear how it actually was. At least give me that."

 

Jensen stared at him for a moment or two and then shook his head. "You're a little sick in the head, you know that? It was...great."

 

"Just great?"

 

"Fantastic. It wasn't really, y'know.." He waved a hand in front of himself, hoping Chris would get it. He didn't want to say that he hadn't actually had sex with Jared and he especially didn't want to go into detail about what had happened. "But Jay knows a few things. More than me, anyway. And, yeah, it was pretty amazing."

 

"I'm almost jealous," Chris told him. "Not of..not of that, but 'cause I remember what it was like the first time. You don't ever get that again."

 

"Aw, that's so sweet."

 

"Shut up," Chris laughed. "It's true, and you'll find that out."

 

Jensen nodded even though he wasn't sure he completely agreed. Jared would probably make every single time special, but he wasn't about to try and argue that with his friend. They finished their lunch without much more conversation, Chris telling Jensen he would meet him at the end of the day. 

 

 

 

 

Doug started his revenge attacks that afternoon. Jensen wasn't ready, still wasn't confident enough in himself to fight back. He wasn't expecting it anyway and, despite what little Jared had managed to show him the previous night, he could do nothing to get free from Doug's friends. They caught hold of him in the locker room after gym class, after everyone else had left, and pinned him to the lockers, one man holding either arm. Doug leaned in close, putting one hand to the side of Jensen's head, and told him that this was only the beginning as he punched him in the stomach with the other. 

 

"Wherever the hell you get off bringing your boyfriend to this school," Doug spat, "I don't want to know. But I warned you, Ackles. Maybe you should've listened." He brought his knee up and Jensen cringed as it connected, grimacing in pain. It was over quickly. He was sure that Doug would have done more, but they all heard the next lot of students approaching for their gym session and Jensen was freed, immediately sliding down the lockers and curling up. He heard Doug and his friends leave, greeting a few of the guys who headed in. When he felt like he could stand, and since nobody offered him a hand up, he pulled himself up to his feet and began making his way to his last class of the day, grateful that it was English and that Miss Kilworth would likely excuse him from being late if he came up with even a half-assed reason.

 

She didn't ask as he limped into the room. Just nodded him to his seat and continued talking. He took his desk, wrapping an arm around his stomach as he opened up his knapsack and quietly took out his books. Another bruise, he figured. Another night where he would disappoint Jared and piss him off.

 

After class was over, Miss Kilworth asked him to stay behind. He knew he was probably about to get the reprimand for being late that he had expected earlier and was almost glad for the delay in getting out of school. At least by the time he got out of there it was possible that the other students had left. That maybe nobody would see Jared picking him up as well. He wasn't expecting her to come and sit on the edge of the desk in front of him and ask him if he was all right.

 

"I'm fine, Miss," he told her. "I'm sorry I was late."

 

"I'm not worried about that. You're good enough with your grades that a few minutes away from one class won't hurt you. Not that I want you to make a habit of it, of course. But you didn't look fine when you walked in and you sure don't look fine now. What's going on?"

 

He shrugged. "It's nothing. I just hurt myself in gym, that's all."

 

"Then you should have got a pass to see the nurse or something. Like I said, your grades are good enough that missing a little bit won't hurt. As long as that's all it is."

 

"That's all it is."

 

"It's just..." She trailed off, sighing. "I heard some of the other kids talking before class started. You're quite a popular subject of conversation today."

 

"Oh."

 

"Yeah. People can be cruel about this kind of thing, I know. There were a couple of students at my old school that, while most people accepted it, there were still a few that used to show off their hate. So if that's what this is about-"

 

"It's not. I just hurt myself in gym, I promise."

 

"Well, if anyone ever does start to tell you it's wrong or attack you because of it, then just remember there are people here you can talk to. There's nothing wrong with it at all."

 

Jensen almost wanted to laugh in her face. God, if she only knew how many people disagreed with her. He settled for nodding his head, though, and asked if he could be excused.

 

"Sure. Take it easy, all right? And if gym class gets any more violent then let someone know."

 

"I will."


	18. Chapter sixteen

  
Author's notes: **Three more today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

Jensen left the English room and decided to hang out in the bathroom for about fifteen minutes, while the noise in the hallways outside died down to nothing. Chris would have given up on waiting for him and gone home, he knew. He'd told him that he was meant to be getting a lift with Jared anyway so he wouldn't be worried. He gathered his books out of his locker and stuffed them in his bag, securing it over his shoulders. As he headed for the main door he heard it squeak open and looked up, half-expecting to find Doug waiting for him.

 

It was Jared. Immediately Jensen lifted himself out of his slouch, ignoring the slight pain in his stomach as he did so.

 

"Hey. Was just wondering where the hell you got to."

 

"I, uh, had to sort some work out." Jensen stopped a couple of feet away from him, eyes darting to either side to make sure that there was definitely nobody else around before he stepped forward once more and kissed Jared on his chin. Jared tugged him forward with two fingers looped around his belt and Jensen tilted his head back to make the reach easier. They kissed quietly and briefly before Jensen followed him out to the bike. Thankfully, nearly all the other kids were gone and the few that remained were too engrossed in their own conversations for now. Jensen knew that would change as soon as Jared started the bike's engine so he shoved the helmet onto his head quick and flicked the visor halfway down, obscuring his face.

 

"You want to rent a movie or take a chance on Jeff's collection?" Jared asked, as he stood behind him pulling his own helmet on. He stepped closer to Jensen and tightened the straps of his bag for him so it was snug against his back. Jensen just wanted to get home, so he suggested they skip the rental store. He wanted to get his homework out of the way before they settled down to anything. 

 

Jared agreed to it and when they got back he left Jensen in peace and took advantage of Jeffrey not being home. He showered for a long time and came down into the kitchen still dripping. Jensen didn't even look around as Jared kissed the back of his head, concentrating hard on getting his essay finished. It got harder after Jared had shoved a load of his teeshirts into the washer and set it going, because once that was done he sat opposite Jensen wearing nothing but his towel and a grin. Jensen found it hard to draw his eyes away from smooth skin and glistening muscle, and especially hard not to stare at Jared's tattooed chest and those damned silver rings. He looked up to find Jared smirking at him and laughed.

 

"Asshole. Go sit somewhere else, okay? I'm not moving 'til I've finished this and if you sit there it's going to take even longer."

 

"Ugh. I hate how logical you are."

 

"I know. Go get dressed. I'll only be another ten minutes, I swear."

 

"Okay." Jared made a show of sighing, of heaving himself up out of his seat, and of disappearing into the garage. He was good, though, and didn't return for a full quarter-hour, leaving Jensen in peace to finish his schoolwork. He came back inside dressed in navy sweatpants and a white wife-beater and snagged two beers from the refrigerator, telling Jensen to come with.

 

Leaving his books out on the table, Jensen followed Jared into the lounge and kicked back on the sofa while the other man selected a movie and stuck it into the player. Jared joined him on the sofa, putting his bare feet up on the table and slinging an arm around the back of Jensen's shoulders.

 

For the first ten minutes they actually both watched the movie, although Jensen found it difficult to follow once Jared began combing his fingers through the back of the younger man's hair. His eyes drifted closed and he felt Jared shifting around beside him, unsurprised when he felt a warm mouth against his jaw.

 

"The movie.." He mumbled.

 

"Why'd you think I chose one I've seen a billion times already?" Jared chuckled, then moved his kisses to Jensen's ear, licking around the lobe and making him swear. Then Jared slid his other hand over Jensen's chest and Jensen quickly sat forward before he could go any lower. 

 

"Okay, maybe we should watch the movie. I haven't seen it and I really don't want Jeff catching us like-"

 

"The movie ain't going anywhere. And Jeff's out for the night, I reckon. Just me and you, for hours. Thought you'd want to make the most of it."

 

"Yeah, but-" Jensen was cut off again as Jared used the hand against his chest to push him back into his seat.

 

"But nothin'. I know you're gonna love this so stop getting all nervous and crap. That stopped being cute last night."

 

"Jay..."

 

Jared didn't listen, instead sliding a hand under Jensen's shirt, thankfully not pressing hard, just skimming over skin until his fingers found Jensen's nipples and began toying with one. Maybe he'd be okay so long as Jared didn't-

 

"Take your shirt off."

 

Jensen didn't even hesitate. He just said no, he didn't really want to, which got him about as far as he'd expected it would.

 

"C'mon, don't be a pussy. Take it off. I promise I'll make it worth it."

 

Knowing Jared would argue forever more if he didn't do as he was told, Jensen slowly unbuttoned his shirt and looked up at the ceiling as Jared pushed it open.

 

"Huh," he said, seeing the dark red mark and bruise straight away. He sat back, staring at Jensen. "Let me guess. Dodgeball?"

 

"You promised, Jay. You promised you wouldn't do anything to him."

 

"I might've said I wouldn't kill or maim him. Never said anything about anything else."

 

"You know how much worse it'd get if you did anything? Everyone would think that I can't fight my own battles and-"

 

"I know, Jensen. I know you said you want to fight this one yourself, but it doesn't look like you're doing such a great job so far, now does it?"

 

"Fuck you," Jensen muttered, slumping back into the sofa. 

 

"Oh, right. Fuck me, huh? I'm just the guy who wants to help your ass out. What the hell d'you think is gonna happen tomorrow, Jen? That overnight you're going to turn into Superman and show that sorry prick what you're made of?"

 

"You know what? Stranger things have happened!"

 

"Not to you!"

 

Jensen rolled off the sofa, annoyed at Jared being so close and pissed that he was right. He sat on the chair opposite and sighed, clutching his hands together. 

 

"See that?" Jared asked. "That's why you keep losing. Don't run the fuck away all the time. Stand your ground. He's not the one who's right; you are. He's not the better man. You are."

 

"You have no idea, Jay. No idea what it's like to live with-"

 

"You know why?" Jared interrupted. "Because I don't sit whining about it to the people I think will listen, okay? I got hurt, I picked myself up, I found the son of a bitch that hurt me and I hurt him right the fuck back. Only way to get their respect. Only way to stop them. You think that I want to hear about how big and scary Doug's been to you all your life? You think I want to hear about how mean I'm being to you by telling you the truth? You're important to me, you know that? Already you're fucking...You're fucking me up in ways I never dreamt of. And that's the reason I'm giving you this shit. You don't want me to fight for you, but, fuck, Jensen.. You gotta do it yourself or I'm not gonna listen any more."

 

"You're a prize fucking dick sometimes."

 

Jared shrugged. "All the time, but be that as it may, I'm a dick who's right about this."

 

Jensen looked away from him finally, staring instead at the TV although he didn't really see it. Eventually he let out a frustrated sigh and pushed himself up, heading into the garage. Jared followed, just as he'd expected.

 

"How the hell do I take on three guys by myself?"

 

"You don't. Doug's a meathead. He's nothing without his pals. You get him on his own, the deal's done."

 

"He's never on his own."

 

"He's gonna let his guard down. You've just never thought to watch for it before now."

 

"And then what? Say I manage to take him down, yeah? I get into shit for punching out the school's star quarterback?"

 

"Because the first thing Doug's gonna do is admit he got flattened by the school's star fag." Jared pulled Jensen into his arms and kissed the top of his head gently. "I know people like him. I know just what he'll do. He'll make some excuse for it, same as you do. And if he needs a little persuading away from putting you in trouble, then there's always plan B."

 

"What the hell's plan B?" Jensen asked. Jared just grinned at him.

 

"You'll find out if it's needed. I promise that it won't cause him any physical harm."

 

"Hmm.."

 

"Scout's honour." Jared gave him a goofy three-fingered salute and Jensen couldn't help but smile. At least Jared hadn't flipped. The truth had hurt, but at least he hadn't done something _stupid_. "Can we get back to watching the movie now?"

 

"You sure you don't want to just cut out the middle man and start making out right now?"

 

Jared laughed at that. At Jensen's choice of words. "Sure, but back on the sofa. Comfier, is all."

 

_And warmer_ , Jensen thought. He followed Jared back to their spot on the couch and they got settled into a comfortable position; Jared on his side with his back against the cushions and Jensen on his side, facing him, their legs interlocked so they couldn't lose their balance. To Jensen, it felt absolutely perfect. More so when Jared closed the distance between their mouths and kissed him. He was careful though, and they got no further with fooling around that night than kisses and soft touches to skin that was already exposed. When the credits rolled on the movie, they both agreed it had been awesome and then Jared let Jensen pull him up off the sofa and out to the garage, locking up the house on the way. 

 

By the time they crashed into bed together, Jensen had a pleasant buzz from the beers and the making out and a deep relief that Jared had stuck to his word. Still in his shorts, quite in spite of Jared's protests, Jensen pressed himself up against Jared's back and curled an arm around him, letting his knuckles brush against his stomach.

 

"Don't get me all horny else I'm gonna make you follow through on it," Jared warned, in a low whisper.

 

"Jay, you're horny every damn second of the day," Jensen retorted, still rubbing his hand back and forth. "Maybe I want to do this without getting anything back."

 

"Mm..no. I don't want to come. The anticipation's better. But you can keep doing that. Feels good." Jared leaned back more against him, his head pressed to Jensen's shoulder. "Keep doing that 'til we both fall asleep."

 

 

 

 

"Gotta go, Jared."

 

"No you don't. I decided. Four days ain't long enough and you're so damned smart that one extra day don't have to count. I'll even write you a sick-note."

 

"Don't be an idiot."

 

"'Dear sir, Jensen was unable to attend school today because his boyfriend kept him in bed all day so he could blow his fucking mind.'" Jared pressed his hand between Jensen's legs as he finished talking, and squeezed to emphasise his point. Jensen rolled away a little and looked over the edge of the bed.

 

"Where's my tie?"

 

"Doesn't matter. You ain't going in today."

 

"Aren't I? So what _am_ I doing?"

 

"Staying with me, like I just said. I got plans for you. And then you don't have to deal with Dougie-boy either."

 

"And my homework?"

 

Jared shrugged. "Call the school. I'll call the school, whatever. If you're that desperate for homework over Thanksgiving then I'm sure we can get it sorted for you."

 

Jensen turned onto his back, raised his arms above his head and clicked his tongue against his teeth. "Okay, wiseass. What if I want to go to school?"

 

"Tough shit. Not gonna let you. Jensen, be a rebel. For once in your life, take a goddamned break. World's not gonna end if you have one day off." He leaned in, sucked a quick bruise just under Jensen's armpit, made him moan.

 

"What are your plans anyway?"

 

"We can stay here in bed all day and I'll show you a little something else, or we can go to this gym I know and I'll show you just how you fuck Doug up without fucking yourself up."

 

"More training?"

 

"Proper training, since the other session apparently didn't work."

 

"And you promise not to be an asshole about it?"

 

"I'm not gonna let you embarrass yourself," Jared told him, dragging Jensen closer. "So forget your fucking tie, yeah?"

 

"Guess I don't have much choice."

 

Jared grinned. "Not really. However, there's about three hours 'til this particular gym opens, so I suggest we stay in bed a while, have a leisurely shower and breakfast and then take a slow ride over on the bike. Sound good?" And Jared felt so warm and inviting right then that Jensen didn't even feel like arguing. He turned to face him and pressed hard against him, hooking one foot around his ankles. "I'll take that as a yes." 

 

 

 

 

The gym was in the basement of a bar and pool hall and there were already a few people in there when Jared led Jensen inside. A couple of them greeted Jared and stared at Jensen in turn, making him feel slightly uncomfortable. He smiled nervously back, almost wishing he'd been strong enough to stand his ground and just go to school. But then, he thought, that was the whole point of this. _Making_ him strong enough. Jared led him to the back corner of the room, past a ring and a row of battered sack-cloth punchbags that made Jensen think this place hadn't been touched in about twenty years. 

 

The walls were yellowed from cigarette smoke and age, and spattered with dark, round spots that Jensen didn't want to think about. There was an old radio in the corner they were headed for, sat on the dusty sill of a narrow window and tuned in to the local station. The noise was minimal, which made Jensen feel almost like he was in a library and would get glared at if he dared to speak.

 

Jared clearly didn't share the sentiment. He dumped the gear he'd brought with him on the floor near a punchbag and told Jensen to hold out his hands. He did so and Jared gripped them hard as he wrapped them. 

 

"This is so you don't hurt yourself too much. If you ever use these moves on Doug, you gotta be careful. They'll hurt him a lot more than you, but you won't get out of it without some sore knuckles." Jensen thought back to the fight at Mickey's, to how sore Jared's hands had been that night, and nodded. "Don't punch too hard. If it's unexpected it can cause just as much damage. This is a heavy bag, so it's not really like hitting an actual person. It's more solid and it doesn't fight back."

 

"Shouldn't I warm up first?" Jensen asked, thinking of his swimming practice.

 

"Will Doug stand and wait while you do twenty star-jumps?" Jared asked, tidying the loose ends of the wrappings. The question was met with silence. "Didn't think so. Now, you're a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for, so take it easy. See what you can do with those swimmer's muscles."

 

Jensen waited until Jared stood aside, then took a swing at the bag. It was heavier than he expected, and certainly more resistant, and he stumbled back a step when his fist connected.

 

"Again," Jared said. "Harder." He was wrapping his own hands as he watched Jensen take another swing. "And again. Just keep going." Now he stood slightly to the side of the bag, in Jensen's line of vision, and as Jensen went to hit it again he gripped the bag tight and moved it slightly. "Move with it. Anticipate. Go again."

 

It was a lot more difficult than Jensen had assumed it might be at first. He'd known Jared would make it harder for him today, and the slight pain that lingered in his abdomen wasn't helping him much. But he was determined not to complain about it, knowing that Jared wouldn't listen to him anyway. He was also determined that he was going to get some form of praise out of Jared, even after half an hour of constant criticism. Even though he was already feeling bruised and tired of it. The punchbag didn't seem to move and, at first, Jensen thought he wasn't hitting hard enough. Then he realized that Jared was still holding it and that his muscles were tensed up from the strength it was taking him to keep it still.

 

"Let go," he told him. "You're not being fair."

 

"Yeah, I am. Wanted to see how hard you would go." Jared let go of the bag and walked round it, standing behind Jensen. "Go on, Jen. Beat the crap out of it. Do that and I'll give you whatever you want."

 

Jensen glanced back at him and then faced the punchbag again. Taking a deep breath and readying his body, he lifted both arms and began.

 

 

 

 

"Fuck, that was amazing." Jensen swallowed, catching his breath in his throat, and coughed. He was unwinding the wrappings on his hands as Jared grinned at him with an 'I told you so' expression. "I didn't know I could-"

 

"Well, now you do." Jared began unwrapping his own hands and Jensen watched the movements, mesmerized. "And this is harder compared to Doug, trust me. You can take him on now and not have any excuses."

 

Jensen lifted his gaze. "So if I don't knock him flat next time..."

 

"If you don't put him on his ass the next time he does something, then that promise I made you? Voided."

 

Jensen's eyes widened momentarily and then he nodded. That was fair. Besides, with the way he felt right now? He knew he wouldn't need Jared's help. "So, hey. You said I could ask for whatever, right?"

 

"Sure. Anything you want."

 

"Can we go to the movies?"

 

"You asking me out on a date, Ackles?"

 

Jensen laughed. "I think we've gone beyond dating, haven't we? I'd just really like to see that new comedy and it'd be more fun with company."

 

"Okay. Since I promised."

 

They went outside and made their way round to the back of the building, to where the Harley was parked out of sight. Jared's own bike was nearly ready to ride again, Jensen knew, so he made the most of the slightly more sedate pace at which Jared rode the bigger motorcycle. Jared took them over to the mall, as when they passed the little independent cinema they saw that the new film wasn't showing there yet. There was a big chain cinema in the mall, though, and Jensen felt more conspicuous than ever as they made their way through the weekday shoppers towards the entrance. 

 

When he was alone with Jared he never noticed it, but out in public, in crowds of people so far away from Jared's version of normal, it was worryingly obvious. Jared got stared at, he got people nudging one another and whispering to their friends. He seemed oblivious; Jensen wondered if he really was. He was different, there was no arguing that, and people clearly equated that with something else. They joined the line outside the cinema and Jensen tried to relax and forget about worrying on what everyone else there was thinking. The queue was fairly long as it was close to the time when the next showings were due to start, so ignoring other people was a little more difficult than it should have been.

 

"Can't believe I let you ask me to do this," Jared said, his voice quiet and close to Jensen's ear.

 

"You'll enjoy it, so don't say another word."

 

"You could've asked Chris to come with you. Bet this is right up his alley."

 

"It's not going to matter, Jay. I doubt you're going to see half the movie anyway, right?"

 

"Oh yeah? Why's that?" Jared asked, taking hold of Jensen's shoulder and turning him enough that he could see his eyes. Jensen just shrugged, because he knew he didn't need to answer that. "If I get to see any of the movie..." Jared pushed Jensen against the wall they were standing next to then, put one hand to the side of his head and held him. As he leaned in, Jensen panicked and started to say something. The words were swallowed, though, as Jared covered his mouth and kissed him, hard. Jensen could feel people staring and squirmed, unable to drag himself away from Jared. He didn't really want to, but the feeling of being this public spectacle all of a sudden was making him uncomfortable. Then Jared's tongue slid into his mouth and he heard himself moan quietly and felt something drop in his stomach. He reached his arms around and threaded his fingers into the curling ends of Jared's thick hair.

 

Kissing Jared, or, rather, being kissed _by_ Jared was really something else. It always felt, Jensen thought, like he was trying to kiss deeper every single time. To get further under Jensen's skin than anyone else had before. Like-

 

"Sir? Excuse me?"

 

Jared pulled away from Jensen, glanced over at the ticket clerk. Other people had bought their tickets and left and the young woman behind the ticket desk was beckoning them both forward, trying to move the queue along.

 

"Still want to see the movie?" Jared asked. 

 

Jensen looked at him, dazed, and shook his head. Jared shrugged, wiped at his bottom lip with his thumb, and then took Jensen's hand to walk him away from the line of staring people. It was then that Jensen figured out why Jared didn't notice people looking at him, because as Jared led him out he found he couldn't concentrate on anything but putting one foot in front of the other and making sure he didn't fall over. He had started to get hard during their kiss and, even though it was easing off, he still felt like he could use some relief. He said as much to Jared, in not quite so many words, as soon as they were outside.

 

"Damn. Jeff'll be home by now, too."

 

"This early?"

 

"Wednesday before Thanksgiving he always finishes real early. But don't worry, I have an idea. Take you somewhere you can make as much noise as you want, even if it's just for a little while."

 

 

 

 

Jensen climbed off the back of the bike and tugged his helmet off, looking up at the flickering neon sign that was missing several bulbs in the word 'VACANCY' and round at the chipped front of the old motel that looked like some forgotten throwback from a 60s road movie.

 

"Seriously?"

 

"Sure, why not? I know the guy who runs the joint. Sure he'll let me rent a room for a couple hours at a reasonable rate."

 

"Anyone you know who isn't just a little bit..." Jensen stopped, not sure how he should put it. Fortunately, Jared just gave him a cheerful wink.

 

"Not many. And it's good for calling in favors when I need them, so stop complaining."

 

Jensen had to admit, although only to himself and not to Jared, that the rooms were actually a lot cleaner than he'd expected. They were still covered in dust on most surfaces, and the paper was peeling from three out of four walls, but the sheets didn't look stained at all and the room smelt like air freshener. Being somewhere nobody knew him was easier, Jensen found, as he stripped down. Jared had rid himself of his clothes as soon as the door was locked behind them and was now pulling the drapes closed. They were on the second floor and there was a small balcony leading off from a pair of french windows that Jensen suspected would screech in protest when they tried to open them. The sun was blocked out, mostly, by the dark drapes, and Jared turned on one of the bedside lights to compensate.

 

"You gonna take your shorts off?" Jared asked as he settled back on the bed, propping his head up on the pillows.

 

"I was thinking I could keep them on and tease you," Jensen told him, sitting down beside him. 

 

"I'm thinking more take them off and let me see you. I like seeing you like that."

 

Jensen felt his cheeks heat up, but did as Jared asked, sliding the shorts off over his hips and pushing them down his legs and off the end of the bed.

 

"Better," Jared told him, before leaning over him and nipping at the side of his neck. He massaged his hands over Jensen's chest, stopping to tease his nipples into stiff peaks which he then moved his kisses down onto. Jensen moaned, holding the back of his head, letting his eyes fall closed. There would be no building up to it, he guessed. The erection that had died down on the ride over now came back and he gasped for air when Jared's fingers tightened around it, moving in a quick motion just once; up and down. Then Jared's hands slid over his stomach instead, light against the bruise and pressing hard everywhere else.

 

Jared lifted his head then and asked Jensen if he was going to just lie there.

 

"Yeah," Jensen told him. "Thought this was for me as a reward."

 

"That what you thought?"

 

Jensen didn't answer, just pushed Jared's head back down against his belly and groaned loudly as he felt sucking, biting kisses on his skin. Jared lifted one leg over Jensen's and moved upward until they were kissing one another, until his cock, just as hard as Jensen's, was pressed against the other man's erection. Jared moved against him, in a weird echo of the kind of sex that Jensen actually knew about, and the sudden friction made him choke on Jared's tongue.

 

"You okay?" Jared asked, raising his head up a fraction to speak.

 

"Mm.." Jensen managed, when he felt far from okay. When he felt weak and shaky and needy like he didn't remember feeling before. Jared pulled down against him, their skin sticking, and then thrust up against him again. He made an undignified whimpering at that, and Jared chuckled into his neck. 

 

"Get used to it," he said, his voice low and husky, as he moved again. Jensen swore and Jared swallowed it, keeping his rhythm slow for now. He kept it slow until he felt Jensen responding with his whole body, rather than just with his hands and his mouth. When Jensen started meeting him halfway, when their hips started pushing together, Jared picked up the pace. The feel of it was still not lost on him; the stickiness of their leaking dicks smeared between their stomachs and the pressure and heat right where he needed it most continued to overwhelm. 

 

He was noisy, too, Jensen was, and Jared was glad they'd come here rather than chancing it back home in the garage. Jensen would have alerted Jeffrey and every neighbour on their block as to what was going on. He was surprised at how little Jensen held back. Surprised that he wasn't more self-conscious given the still public nature of their current surroundings. But it didn't seem to matter as Jensen moaned and swore beneath him, panting for breath and clutching the back of Jared's head tight so he couldn't move away.

 

When he finally came, that was the best sound. Jensen cried out and held it, fingers digging in hard to slick skin, and Jared reached down between them and grabbed hold of his dick, jerking himself off for those last few moments that he needed. He came too, quieter, and collapsed against Jensen as he did.

 

There was no sound for quite a while other than their laboured attempts to calm their breathing and, once he was back down from his high, Jared rolled off Jensen and lay beside him. Side by side they stayed, naked and sweaty and spattered with come, until Jared finally broke the silence.

 

"Worth skipping school for?"

 

 

 

 

It was just beginning to turn dark when Jared woke up. He turned over, smiling at the view he was presented with. Jensen stood naked in front of the motel room window, the drapes pulled slightly open, looking out at the dusky sky. He looked back over his shoulder when he heard Jared move. "Hey, sleeping beauty."

 

"Yeah?"

 

"We should get back. Jeff'll be wondering what the hell happened to us."

 

Jared yawned. "Yeah. Okay. Shower first, though."

 

"I already did. So hurry up." Jensen watched Jared get out of bed and just as he was about to go into the dank little bathroom, he caught his arm. "Jay?"

 

"What?"

 

"Thanks for today. For everything."

 

Jared kissed him, soft and silent. "You're welcome."


	19. Chapter seventeen

  
Author's notes: **Three more today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

"Jeff!"

 

Shirtless and standing in the garage, Jared polished off the last of the beer in his bottle. His jeans rode low on his hips; something Jensen noticed as he continued to change up on the second level. 

 

" _Jeffrey_!"

 

A second or two later, there was the sound of stomping footsteps nearing the door to the kitchen. Jeffrey grumbled as he ripped the door open. " _What_?"

 

Jared set a hand to his ribs and then belched loudly, tossing the beer bottle into a bin in the corner. "Where the hell were you?"

 

"I was _cleaning_ ," he almost snarled, clearly having lost his patience. "What do you want, that you couldn't have walked ten feet into the house to ask me?"

 

"Why are you _cleaning_?"

 

"Because tomorrow is Thanksgiving."

 

"Oh." Jared thought for a moment and glanced up at Jensen, who was still on the second level. Jensen smiled, looking just as puzzled, but didn't say anything. Jared, however, could tell something was up. "We're out of beer, dude."

 

Jeffrey sighed. "I'll alert the media," he said. "Go get more." He started to close the door, stopping short when Jared continued to speak.

 

"Can't," he told him. "Already drank."

 

Gritting his teeth to try and salvage what patience he had left, Jeffrey shook his head. "Then save yourself for tomorrow night," he said. "Because there's no beer at the table."

 

Jared looked horrified. Jensen chuckled at him as he finished dressing, pulling on one of Jared's old T-shirts. He'd found, when moving, that while he did have a couple pairs of jeans, he owned very few "bum shirts," as Jared called them. And Jared refused to let him wear his smart button-downs, so he regularly had to pilfer Jared's stash. 

 

"What the hell are you talking about?" Jared asked. "Such tyranny!"

 

Jeffrey rolled his eyes and told Jared to stop being so dramatic. "It's not like I'm asking you to give up forever. Just for one night."

 

Jensen could instantly tell that his mood had changed. He was returning to the same old Jeffrey, his anger vanished. He climbed down the ladder as the two men talked, moving into the kitchen instead of hanging out in the garage. Jensen followed them inside, opening the refrigerator and snagging a can of plain-label cola from inside.

 

"We're having _wine_ with dinner tomorrow," Jeffrey explained.

 

"Wine?" Jared said, scoffing slightly. "What the fuck for?"

 

Jeffrey moved back to the dishwasher, trying to cram what other dishes he could into the baskets. "Because that's what civilized people _do_ , Jared," he said.

 

"We've never had wine with dinner before."

 

"Well, maybe I want to make a fairly good impression considering I got your ass hanging around."

 

There it was. Jared and Jensen met each other's eyes for just a moment. "Who's coming to dinner?" Jensen asked.

 

Jeffrey shifted as they both stared at him, waiting. "I...A friend."

 

"What, like, Mitch from the yard kind of friend?" Jared asked, curious.

 

"More…female. Why the hell am I explaining this to you brats?"

 

Jensen laughed, not seeing that Jared seemed less than pleased. "Well, who is she? Are you going to tell us or just leave us in suspense?"

 

"You're a pair of nosey fucks, aren't you? Her name's Stevie."

 

"Nicks?" Jared asked, suddenly hopeful.

 

"No, not Nicks. Kilworth."

 

Jensen nearly spit his soda at them. He choked slightly and managed to keep back most of the deluge. A hand to his mouth, he made himself swallow hard as Jeffrey and Jared turned to look at him. "Kilworth? As in...Misses Kilworth that teaches English at my _school_?"

 

Jeffrey turned away from the both of them, pretending to fidget with something on one of the spokes in the dishwasher. _This shouldn't be so difficult_ , he thought. _I'm a grown man for crying out loud_. "Yeah. She works at your school. That's where I met her. When I took you in last week."

 

"Last week?" Jared spluttered out. "You've known her less than a week and you've invited her to Thanksgiving?"

 

Jeffrey faced them again, a little annoyed at the tone Jared was taking with him. "She has nobody else to spend it with. And I really like her. You will too, Jay--"

 

"Why the hell should I? Thanksgiving's meant to be family, isn't it?"

 

"Oh, right?" Jeffrey took a step closer and Jensen tried to move away without being too obvious about it. He felt uncomfortable, on edge, more so when Jeffrey waved a hand in his direction. "And Jensen, is he going home to be with his _family_? No, I didn't think so. You just drop it, Jay. That's all this is, a home of broken families. But it's still my house and I invite into it whoever I damn well please." His voice softened again, and he placed a firm hand on Jared's shoulder. "Promise me you will give her a chance. I'm still..." He trailed off, sighing, and met Jared's eyes. "I don't want to mess this up. I think she's going to become pretty special to me and I want you to like her too. Jensen?"

 

"Yes, sir," Jensen answered, automatically. 

 

Jared gritted his teeth, his gaze drifting from Jeffrey to Jensen. He looked at the younger of the two as if he had just been betrayed. Without a word, he turned on his heel and walked out of the kitchen, heading back into the garage.

 

Jensen frowned and skirted around Jeffrey, mumbling something that the man couldn't make out. He watched Jensen run after Jared, heard the jangle of keys and then the sound of his old motorcycle revving up. Sighing, Jeffrey brushed his palm over his face, frustrated. That hadn't gone as well as he'd hoped it would.

 

 

 

 

"Where are we going?" Jensen asked. 

 

Jared had had barely enough time to slip on his black leather jacket. He didn't even acknowledge Jensen's question at first. He did look at Jensen accusingly though, and for a moment, Jensen wished he hadn’t asked. 

 

"We?" Jared repeated to him. "You seemed pretty cozy in there with Daddy-Oh. Why don't you just go back in there and kiss his ass a little more?"

 

"Jared," Jensen complained. "It wasn't like that."

 

Jared chuckled, sounding annoyed. "Yeah, well, you 'yes sir'd' him pretty damn fast."

 

"I was trying to calm both of you down!"

 

Narrowing his eyes, Jared nodded his head. "Yeah," he said, barely loud enough to hear over the rumbling of the bike. "You looked like it."

 

"Get off the bike."

 

"Why?"

 

"Because you're half-drunk," Jensen reminded him. "And you're too upset."

 

"Shut _up_ , Jensen," Jared returned, almost whining at him. "Jesus Christ."

 

"Don't tell me to shut up," he snapped. 

 

"Oh, now you get balls?" Jared laughed and shook his head. "You can let that skinny ass excuse for a bully kick your ass every day, but with me, you actually work up the courage to fight? Well, God _damn_."

 

Aligning his jaw in anger, Jensen reached out and snagged the keys from the ignition, fighting off Jared as he quickly palmed the keys. "Get off the bike," he said, thankful for the sudden silence. 

 

Furious, Jared swung off the bike and moved towards Jensen. "Give me the keys," he snarled.

 

Jensen shook his head as he took one step back for each step Jared took towards him. "No."

 

"Give me," Jared continued, stepping towards him, "the _goddamn keys_."

 

Jensen bumped up against the edge of the work bench -- stuck. He had nowhere to run to, to hide. He would have been lying if he'd said that he wasn't absolutely terrified at that moment. But he wasn't going to back down. Jared and Jeffrey had both tried to teach him to be tougher than that. "Why are you being such a jerk?" he asked, his voice still much calmer than Jared's.

 

"I'm not being a j--"

 

"Yes, you are," Jensen interrupted. "So _what_ if Jeffrey wants to have Misses Kilworth over? What do you _care_?"

 

Jared glared at him. To keep Jensen right there, and give him no other choice but to listen, Jared set one hand at either side of Jensen's body, caging him against the work bench. "What do you want to hear, Jen?" he asked, his voice low with fury. "How do you want me to start it? You want to hear about how my own father wanted nothing to do with me? You want to hear about how it took me almost a year to even let Jeff in? Or maybe about how after Mom died, I didn't have one goddamn soul in the world caring about me except him? You wanted to know me, right?"

 

Jared had managed to launch himself into a very scary demeanor and Jensen didn't like it. "Jared, stop," he said. 

 

"What else do you want to know about? The robbed liquor store when I was seventeen? The stolen bike a year later? Maybe about the lame little shoplifting charge when I was twelve, how about that?"

 

Furrowing his brow, Jensen shook his head. "What are you doing?" he asked, his soft voice such a contrast to Jared's angry tone. He didn't understand how any of that related to the argument.

 

"Making my _point_ ," he snapped back. "Through all of that shit, Jeff never left. He was disappointed in me, sure. But he never _left_ me. She walks into the picture, he's gone. I know it!"

 

"Why?"

 

Fury took over and Jared grabbed hold of Jensen's collar. He bounced him off of the wall just once for effect, hoping that that would get his point across more clearly. "Because she's _not Mom_ ," he shouted, inches from Jensen's face.

 

In the sudden silence, Jensen could do nothing, say nothing. If it had been Jared's mother that Jeffrey was still with, they would have been a family. Jeffrey had avoided any other relationships mostly because, when Jared was young, he didn't have the time or energy. As the boy grew, he simply found it difficult to think about women when all he could worry about was whether Jared was getting himself into trouble again. And now Stevie had entered the picture and Jared didn't like what he thought was a betrayal to his mother's memory. 

 

Jensen just stared over at Jared, almost stunned. After several seconds, he shook his head. "He's not leaving you, Jared," he told him. He gazed into hazel green eyes, finding more fear there than Jared would ever admit to. "Maybe he's thought that now that you're grown up, maybe it's okay for him to let you go."

 

It took a few seconds to sink in. As soon as Jared realized what Jensen had said, he crumpled, bowing his back just enough to rest his head against Jensen's shoulder. The alcohol in his bloodstream was still strong, making him dizzy. He felt Jensen reach up to him with one hand, resting his long fingers at the back of Jared's neck. 

 

"I'm so glad I'm fucking the chick that writes for Dear Abby."

 

Jensen smiled. He probably should have taken offense at such a comment, but he didn't. Somehow, he knew that was Jared's lame way of apologizing. He thought about teasing back, reminding Jared that he'd not fucked _anything_ yet, but decided that maybe now was not the time. “Are you going to be okay?”

 

“No,” he said. “Maybe. I don’t know.” Raising his head, Jared spied down at Jensen for a moment. "I'm going to bed," he said. 

 

It was far too early, but Jared looked exceptionally drained. Jensen watched him go, smiling as Jared shed his leather jacket down to the sofa upon passing it by. Moving away from the bench, Jensen dropped the bike keys into a utility drawer, and closed the garage door. He knew that, without a doubt, Jared would not awaken until morning. He decided that was for the best, and it left him free to help Jeffrey out.

* * *

"I look ridiculous."

 

"You do not," Jensen chuckled. "You look very dashing."

 

"James Bond looks dashing," Jared corrected, smoothing the awful black tie down over his stomach. "I look like a Goodfella wannabe."

 

Adjusting his own tie, Jensen eyed Jared. "Jeffrey said that we should look nice."

 

"Nice," he clarified. "Not ready to show up for some poor asshole's funeral."

 

"Jared." He sighed and reached out to force Jared to look at him. "Promise me you'll keep it on."

 

"Whatever."

 

"Promise."

 

"Fine, I promise."

 

Settled, Jensen headed for the ladder, leaving Jared to fume in solitary silence. Inside the house, Jeffrey was nervous, he could tell. He was dressed nicely, though without a tie. His sports coat was slung over the back of a chair, and the sleeves to his white dress shirt were rolled up to the elbows, exposing muscular forearms. He had oven mitts on his hands and was leaning into the stove to retrieve a couple of pies. Pumpkin and apple.

 

"Wow, you made pie?" Jensen asked, reaching for a bowl of Planter's mixed nuts that sat on the counter. 

 

"I made the money to buy them," Jeffrey answered. He saw Jensen sneaking a snack and reached out to bat at his hands with the mitts. "You're going to spoil your dinner."

 

"No, I'm not," he said. "I'm starving. What times does Misses Kilworth show up?"

 

Jeffrey looked down at his watch as he set the oven mitts to the side. "Any minute--"

 

The doorbell rang. 

 

"Now," Jeffrey finished. 

 

Jensen noted a look of fear in Jeffrey's eyes. No, not fear. Worry. Jeffrey was actually worried that he wouldn't make a good impression. Jensen had the feeling that he'd already done so if Misses Kilworth was at the house. She didn't look the kind to easily give in to just anyone.

 

Jeffrey smoothed the dress shirt down over his belly and quickly brushed his sleeves down to his wrists. "Jen, check the turkey for me, would you, please?"

 

He nodded. "Sure." He did what was asked of him, remaining by the stove as he glanced over to spy on Jeffrey crossing the living room through the open door of the kitchen. Sure enough, Miss Kilworth, the English teacher at his school, stood there on the stoop, smiling up at the host. Jensen could hear Jeffrey mumble a hello to her as he pushed the turkey back into the oven. Just as he turned, he saw her stand up on her toes to give him a kiss. The embrace lasted longer than just a friendly gesture, and Jensen arched his eyebrows. Miss Kilworth seemed to be more than just a friend and yet, oddly, it fit.

 

"You look beautiful," Jeffrey told her. He took the bottle of wine she offered him and turned towards the kitchen. "You remember Jen?"

 

"Jensen," she smiled, reaching out to him. "Of course!"

 

He reached out too, ready to take her hand, but she bypassed the friendly handshake, in favor of a hug. He chuckled softly and patted her back as she embraced him. "Hi, Misses Kilworth."

 

Pulling back from him, she waved away the name. "Silly," she said. "You can call me Stevie."

 

His smile was forced for a moment as he thought about her request. "No, I really don't think I can," he returned.

 

"Jen is what we call 'anal,'" Jeffrey said, using his fingers to make quote marks in the air.

 

"I am not," he argued, smiling at Jeffrey. "I'm polite."

 

"There's a difference?"

 

"Leave him alone," Stevie interrupted playfully. "I like it. Chivalry is hard to come by these days. Alright, what can I do to help?"

 

"You don't have to do a thing," he returned.

 

"I know I don't have to. I want to." She looked around, eyes settling on the table. "Jensen, want to help me set the table?"

 

"No," Jeffrey argued.

 

"Sure," Jensen shrugged.

 

Jeffrey looked at him, his dark eyes narrowing slightly. "Traitor."

 

Laughing, Jensen patted Jeffrey's shoulder. "You're still the best host there is, Jeff."

 

After the table was set, the food laid out on the kitchen island and counters (there was no room on the table after Stevie got creative with the decorating), Jeffrey took off the oven mitts he'd put on again and turned towards the garage door. The television was blaring out there, so he yelled loudly to his boy. "Jared! Dinner!" He waited where he was until he heard the television click off. Satisfied, he moved to the table and sat down at the head, Stevie and Jensen adjacent to him, the other end of the table left open for Jared. 

 

The garage door opened and closed, and Jared rounded the corner. "Je-sus _Christ_ ," he said aloud. "This place looks like a goddamn spread in Better Homes and Gardens."

 

Horrified, Jeffrey and Jensen stared at Jared. He had shed his tie and suit jacket, now wearing a Mötley Crüe shirt and ripped jeans. He carried a six-pack of beer with him, with one already missing. The cans clinked as he set them down in front of his place on the table and popped another one out. Jeffrey was pretty sure, by the way he was acting, that Jared had already drank a six-pack of the beer, and was already drunk when he got the call for dinner.

 

"Jared."

 

"Yo," he belched back, looking over at Jeffrey. 

 

"Where did you get the beer?"

 

"Walked to the store," he answered. "Can we dig in or what?"

 

Annoyed, Jeffrey sighed, but decided to put his anger aside for now. "Jared, this is Stevie."

 

She reached out a hand, deciding that a hug probably wasn't going to fly with Jared.

 

Jared picked up his plate and stood from his place. "Charmed," he said with a sarcastic smirk, and moved to the kitchen island where the food was lain out.

 

Wide-eyed, Jensen looked over at Jeffrey and Stevie. He was just as stunned as they were, and a little remorseful. He should have seen this coming, the way Jared had been acting the previous day. Swallowing nervously, Jensen got up from his chair and followed Jared towards the food. "What the hell are you doing?" he asked, his voice just a whisper.

 

Jared plopped a spoonful of mashed potatoes on his plate, already stuffed with corn and turkey dressing. "Getting food," he said. "What does it look like?"

 

"What happened to the suit? You said you'd wear it. You promised."

 

"I didn't say for how _long_ , though." He forked a number of slabs of turkey breast onto his plate, topped them off with cranberry sauce, a little gravy.

 

"That's not fair."

 

"Yeah, life's a bitch," he agreed, licking off his thumb and forefinger. "You done correcting me like a four year old?"

 

Before he could even answer, Jared turned away from him and headed back towards the table. Jensen was left stunned, staring after him. He watched Jared noisily drop the plate down on the table from too great a height, not caring that some of the food fell down to the white table cloth. He downed the last of his beer, belched, popped open another and started eating.

 

Jeffrey, Stevie, and Jensen finally got their own food. Dinner was not had in silence, as Jared had thought it would be. Stevie, animated and bubbly, talked through the meal, engaging all three men around her. Granted, she only got a grunt or a sharp word from Jared, but she attempted to include him. Her laugh was adorable and her eyes were soft and gentle. Jared tried not to think about that though. 

 

Jeffrey, on the other hand, had nothing but daggers for Jared in his eyes. He ate, smiled at Stevie and Jensen, but glared at Jared. 

 

Jared knew they would have a fight before the end of the night, but he didn't fucking care. 

 

Bring it on.


	20. Chapter eighteen

  
Author's notes: **Three more today!!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

When he was finished eating, Jared leaned back in his chair, slouching, and polished off the rest of his beer. He gazed back at Jeffrey, not a hint of remorse in his eyes. Stevie went on talking, giggling and gesturing with her hands. Jared occasionally glanced over to Jensen. He was smiling with sparkling eyes, clearly enjoying her company. When Jeffrey looked at her, his eyes softened, and that made Jared even more angry.

 

When Jeffrey was cutting into the pies, there was a knock at the door. Jensen was in a heated-but-friendly debate with Stevie, and Jared was obviously not going to help, so Jeffrey moved around the kitchen island and headed for the door, setting his thumb to his mouth to lick off the apple pie that had spilled upon his skin. Opening the door, he smiled when he saw a familiar face. "Hey," he greeted. "Come on in! Jensen, someone to see you."

 

Jensen turned towards the door and instantly, his smile deteriorated into a shocked expression. "Mom?"

 

Jared closed his eyes in frustration. This day was not going well for him. He watched Jensen stand from his chair and head closer to his mother. His little sister was with her. They quietly asked if they could talk outside. Jensen excused himself and walked his mother and baby sister out into the yard. 

 

Back at the counter again, Jeffrey began dishing out the pie. Apple was Stevie's favorite, so he gave her a healthy slice. "Jared," he said. "Pie?" He didn't know why he was even offering, considering Jared had been such a little asshole all through dinner. "Jared," he said again.

 

" _No_ ," he snapped, standing from his chair. He moved over to the window in the living room that looked out to the yard. He ignored Jeffrey's growl of frustration and stared through the sheer curtains, the same window dressings his mother had put up. Even though she could have had a much nicer house with the money she had behind her, she chose to live here with Jeffrey. With Jared. 

 

It really was what Jeffrey said, a broken home. He looked over to the table where the only father he’d ever known and Stevie sat, mumbling quietly between themselves. They looked happy, and Jared should have been happy for them. But he was too proud to admit that his adoptive father had been right. About everything. He turned away, looking back out the window. Jensen's mother was doing her best not to cry, wiping away her tears with her hands, and Kenzie hadn't let go of him since he'd walked outside, her little arms wrapped around his waist. Jensen's back was to the window, and if he felt Jared's eyes upon him, he didn't acknowledge him. He simply rubbed at Kenzie's back and reached out to embrace his mother when her tears got the best of her. 

 

_She's asking him to come back home_. The thought skittered through Jared's head before he really latched onto it. _No, she's not. Yes, she is, you idiot. She's telling him how miserable she and the rest of the family are at home. Look at his sister. She can't let go of him. He's got such a soft heart that he'll go back, just to keep them happy_. 

 

His stomach churned and twisted; he felt sick and dizzy. Bracing himself on the window casing, Jared squeezed his eyes shut and took a couple of deep breaths. When he opened his eyes again, Jensen was kissing his mother goodbye. She looked over to the window and waved, a smile upon her face. He did not wave back.

 

_See how happy she is_? he thought. _Jen's told her he'll talk to me. He's told her that he'll come back home_.

 

"What do you think, Jared?" Stevie asked, turning to look at him. If she was clued into the tension in the room, and Jeffrey didn't see how she couldn't be, she gave no indication of it whatsoever. "Should Jeffrey get a puppy?"

 

"I think Jeffrey should do whatever the fuck he wants," he answered, turning from the window. "Obviously, he doesn't need to hear my side of anything."

 

The front door opened again, and Jensen stepped inside, a slight smile upon his face. He felt that perhaps he'd been the topic of conversation when he walked in and it all went silent. But when Jeffrey stood and turned to face Jared, his smile vanished again and he felt a pang of anxiety hit him. Jared had mouthed off one too many times, he could see it in Jeffrey’s face.

 

"Is there a _problem_ , Jared?" Jeffrey asked. 

 

He shrugged his shoulders. "You mean like alienation?"

 

Jeffrey was dumbfounded for a second. "Alienation?" he repeated. "What the hell are you talking about?"

 

Drunkenly, Jared laughed. "Yeah, like you don't know."

 

"Is this about me inviting a friend over for Thanksgiving dinner?"

 

"I think we all know she's not a _friend_ , Jeff," he told him. "So you can stop pretending now."

 

Jeffrey nodded. "I see," he said, his voice much calmer than his eyes would lead one to believe. "So, how is her presence here any different from Jensen's?"

 

Jensen swallowed, not liking being tossed into the argument.

 

"At least _I'm_ not ruining a family by having him here."

 

"Ruining a _family_?" Jeffrey repeated, his voice growing in volume. "For the love of _Christ_ , I wish you weren't drunk."

 

"Why?" Jared challenged. "It should be easy as fuck to kick my ass out now. Or -- oh, wait -- maybe you just don't like how right I am, hm? You think, Jensen?"

 

"You're not right about anything," Jeffrey snapped, answering before Jensen could. "There is no family being torn apart here."

 

" _Yes, there is_!" Jared nearly screamed. " _My_ family!"

 

Jeffrey narrowed his eyes at him, this time more out of confusion than anger. "What..."

 

"My family," Jared said again. Although, this time, his voice wasn't booming as it was before. He still spoke angrily, his words slightly slurred, but he felt clearer than he had in a while. "You’re my father."

 

Those last three words tugged at Jeffrey's heartstrings. He'd never heard them come from Jared like that before. It all came down to change. Jared had always been wary of change when it affected him so much, regardless of the demeanor he carried. And the fear of losing what he'd had without a doubt for so many years suddenly had him in an uproar. Tears glinted in his eyes, but they did not fall. "Jay," Jeffrey spoke softly.

 

"And as soon as you have her, I'm out of the picture."

 

Jeffrey shook his head. "Jay, no," he said, taking a step forward. His heart fell some when Jared took an equal step back, not wanting to be near him. "Jared. Listen to me. I'm not doing this, seeing Stevie, to get _rid_ of you. Did it ever occur to you that I want a family of my own too?"

 

" _I'm_ your family," he snapped, a finger pointed at his own chest.

 

"Yes, you are," Jeffrey agreed. "And I've _never_ been sorry that I got the chance to raise you like you were my own boy. Never. But, Jay, you have Jensen now. You and I, we'll always be paisans, you know? But I thought maybe, now that you have him..."

 

Jared reached up and wiped away the tears that threatened to fall, using the heels of his hands. He sniffled loudly and looked at Jensen. "Maybe you'd like to tell them that you’re leaving, Jen?"

 

Stunned, Jensen just stared over at Jared for a few seconds. "What?"

 

"You're leaving?" Jeffrey asked, confused.

 

"What?" Jensen asked again.

 

Furious, Jared made his way through the house, pushing past Jeffrey and going towards the garage once again. Jensen quickly followed, saying a polite "excuse me" as he passed between Jeffrey and Stevie. 

 

"You're leaving?" Jeffrey said again.

 

"I'll be right back!" Jensen called over his shoulder.

 

Jared was in the garage, searching through the drawers that held odds and ends, nuts and bolts, things that never really had a home. 

 

"What the hell was all of that in there?"

 

Turning, Jared only glared at him. He faced the work bench again, opening drawers and closing them again. "What the fuck did you do with the keys to the bike?"

 

"Why?"

 

"Why do you _think_ , Einstein?" 

 

Jensen shrugged his shoulders, his heart pounding. "Don't remember."

 

"Oh, right. You're still doing the innocent thing, I forgot." 

 

"What the hell's wrong with you?" 

 

"Nothing," he said. "Nothing's wrong with me, Jen." 

 

"You're drunk." 

 

Jared laughed and turned to face him again. "Yeah. Could be," he returned. He opened his arms wide. "Think maybe if I drink enough I can just wipe out everything?" 

 

Jensen watched the man's arms fall back down to his sides. He frowned, confused. "Jared, I don't know what you're trying to tell me." 

 

"Your mom's real nice." He watched as Jensen frowned again, not understanding the change of topic. "She'd probably have you home if you want to go." He rolled his eyes at the ceiling, waving a hand at himself. "Why'm I saying 'if'? Of course you want to go. You'd be stupid not to. Stick here with me and Jeff and fucking Stevie. One big happy fucking family." 

 

Jensen watched him kick at one of the nearby boxes, hearing something inside clink and break. The sound made him jump a little. "You should go inside and apologize," he advised. "You're being stupid." 

 

Seeing red, Jared pushed away from the work bench and crossed the garage floor to where Jensen stood. He took two fistfuls of the man's collar and threw him up against the garage door. Regardless of the force used, Jensen just watched Jared, letting only the slightest of pained groans escape him. 

 

"You don't even want to pretend to fuck with me, Jensen," Jared snarled at him.

 

"Or what?"

 

"Don't tempt me."

 

"Seriously, did you take a course on being an asshole, or did this ability just magically develop overnight?"

 

Jared bounced Jensen off the doors again, his bottom jaw jutting out in anger. "Why don't you just be a good little rich boy and run on home, like Mommy asked?"

 

He made a face at Jared. "For God's sake, what are you _talking_ about?"

 

"Don't even pretend, you little prick," he spat. "I know she was here to beg you to come home. I saw it. In both of them. In you."

 

Jensen shook his head. "You should probably know what you're talking about before you actually _talk_ about it," he said. "But it appears that you're too busy throwing a tantrum like a goddamn four year old to really see what's going on."

 

Before he even realized what he was doing, Jared pulled back and punched Jensen square on the mouth. Jensen's head bounced off the wall, and his lip began to bleed. This time he did go down, cursing out his pain. 

 

"What the fuck was that for?" he wanted to know.

 

"You want to learn how to fight?" Jared asked. "There's a great lesson for you. Those who mouth off to you don't get a second goddamn try."

 

Jensen had always thought he was a pretty quick learner. This was no different. Gritting his teeth, he rose up to his full height and tackled Jared to the garage floor. There, he balled up his fist and swung. Granted, the punch wasn't as powerful as Jared's, and it really hurt Jensen's hand, but he'd at least not backed down this time. Straddling Jared's body, Jensen took hold of the man's collar and picked him up off the floor to glare into his eyes. "She was asking what you wanted for Christmas, you asshole."

 

Jared searched Jensen's eyes for any hint of a lie, and found nothing. Stunned, he could say nothing in return. He watched Jensen let go of him, allowing him to fall back into the cement floor. There was a clink and something dropped onto his chest.

 

"There's your goddamn keys."

 

Jensen's weight left his body and he remained there for a moment more, listening to Jensen's footsteps. When they stopped, he got up, pocketing the keys, and touched a finger to his nose. Blood decorated his finger when he looked down at it again. Not a lot of blood, but still, Jensen had scored one on him. "So why was she crying?"

 

Jensen had sat and picked up a towel that Jared had used from his shower that morning and had draped over the back of the sofa. He dabbed at his busted lip with a corner of the towel and then tossed the cloth over to Jared. "Because she's Mom," he answered. "Because she cries at Hallmark commercials. At stupid, cheesy black and white movies. Everything."

 

"Because she misses you."

 

Jensen nodded. "Because she misses me," he agreed.

 

Wiping the blood away, Jared sniffed through his nose. "She didn't ask you to leave?"

 

He was a little annoyed with the question and scoffed. "So what if she did?" he asked. "You know what my answer would be if she _did_ ask."

 

The door to the inside of the house opened with too much force, banging against the wall behind it. The sudden sound had both their heads snapping around. Jeffrey stomped down the stairs and closer to Jared. "I just sent her home," he growled.

 

Jensen wasn't sure if he was speaking to Jared or him.

 

"You and I, son," Jeffrey continued, poking a finger at Jared's chest, "are going to have a talk." He turned and looked at Jensen. "Jensen, thank you for punching him in the face, but if you'll excuse us, I need to talk to my _child_."

 

Jensen saw Jeffrey meet Jared's eyes on the last word. Between the small sparring match, and Jeffrey's angry voice, Jared had sobered up pretty quick. His shoulders fell and he lowered his head as he stood before his father. Jensen got up from the sofa and made his way into the house. As he sat in the living room instead, the television clicked off, he listened to the muffled sound of the argument out in the garage. 

 

 

 

 

This was it.

 

He'd only just toed the line before, but this time, Jared knew he had launched himself well over the boundary. Jeffrey's brown eyes burned dark with fury. The silver in his beard and hair, which usually gave him such a kind, soft-hearted look, now made his demeanor seem sinister and chilling.

 

This was it. 

 

Jeff was going to kill him.

 

Taking a step back, Jared kept going until he bumped into the garage wall. "Jeff," he said, holding a hand out to him.

 

Jeffrey bypassed the outstretched arm and set both of his hands to Jared's chest. He shoved the young man backwards, bouncing him off of the wall. With his jaw tightened, Jeffrey clenched his hand into a fist and lashed out.

 

Jared cringed, turning his head to the side and awaiting the punch. Instead, he heard Jeffrey's fist hit the wall. It wasn't a mistake. Jeff had never struck him before -- not really -- and he wasn't going to start, no matter how much he wanted to. Desperately wanted to. Hands partially ready to cover his head, Jared slowly faced Jeffrey, looking directly into his adoptive father's eyes. It was silent for a moment, both of them staring at each other, Jared caged between Jeff's arms just like he had done to Jensen before.

 

"I don't ask for much, Jay," Jeffrey finally said, his voice low and gravelly. "I don't ask for anything more than a little respect."

 

"I respect you." His voice was soft, barely audible.

 

"No you _don't_ , Jared!" he suddenly yelled, almost before Jared had finished his sentence. "You embarassed the _shit_ out of me!"

 

He said nothing in return, just looked over at him.

 

"In case you hadn't noticed, I kind of like Stevie," he smirked, his voice quieter than before but still filled with anger. "About as much as you do Jensen."

 

That declaration scared Jared more than he cared to admit. He swallowed, still looking directly into Jeffrey's eyes.

 

"And if you've done anything, Jay," he continued, "anything to fuck this up, I will kick your ass. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, acting the way you did. Jensen was embarrassed for you."

 

"I didn't _do_ anything," he tried to interrupt. 

 

"Oh, didn't you, Jay?" Jeffrey asked, eyes narrowed. "You showed off your true colors. And there was an awful lot of yellow in there."

 

The insult infuriated Jared. He clenched his jaw, teeth grinding, nostrils flaring as he glared at Jeffrey. "I'm not afraid of _anything_."

 

"Yes, you are," Jeffrey snarled, pointing a finger in the man's face. "You're afraid of being alone, of me moving on. I've tried not to spoil you, but me waiting to have anyone else in my life but you has made you think that you own me. Well, _guess what_ , Jared? You don't. You don't own me, Jensen doesn't own me, your mother didn't even own me."

 

The mention of his mother made Jared ready to brawl. He shoved at Jeffrey, knocking the man off balance for just a moment. Since it was Jeffrey that had taught him to fight to begin with, the older man still had a few moves on Jared. He didn't hit him, but he twisted out of Jared's grasp and ended shoving him up against the wall beside the sliding garage door, the collar to Jared's shirt bunched up in both of his fists. 

 

"Get off your goddamn high horse, Jared," Jeffrey growled at him. "How do you think it makes me feel when you spend the free time that used to be mine, with Jensen? How do you think I feel when you can't respect me enough in my own damn home?"

 

"Fine," Jared bit out. "Keep your goddamn house and your goddamn rules. I'm out of here."

 

"Don't pull that shit with me," he returned. "If you feel you have to move out of here to get your life together, fine. But don't pretend you're going to leave just out of spite. You stand here and you deal with what you've done. You made your bed, now you can lie in it."

 

Jared pushed against him. "Get off me, man," he growled.

 

"Where are the keys to my bike?" 

 

"What? Why?"

 

"Because you don't get it anymore," he snapped. "Get me the goddamn keys."

 

As much as he wanted to fight against Jeffrey, the respect that the man had been talking about before was working on him. He angrily shoved himself free, dug into his pocket for the keys to the bike. Jared slapped the keys into Jeff's hands. "Take 'em," he said, his voice loud and sharp.

 

"And you're grounded," Jeffrey said, clasping the keys in his hands and pointing a finger at Jared.

 

"What?" He was dumbfounded. "You can't _ground_ me."

 

"You keep acting like a spoiled rotten teenager, I can do whatever I damn well please, Jared," he replied. But, in a way, Jared was right. He was too old to be grounded. Jeffrey didn't care though. He wanted to get his point across. "One night."

 

"Oh, Jesus Christ, come _on_!" 

 

"You want to go for two nights?"

 

He kicked at a nearby box, grumbling all sorts of rude things under his breath. He raked his fingers through his hair and sighed, pacing like a caged animal. When he heard Jeffrey's footsteps on the metal ladder leading to the second level of the garage, Jared looked up at him. "What are you doing?"

 

"Jensen's sleeping in the house tonight," he answered, gathering up a pillow and blanket from the bed.

 

" _What_?"

 

"You heard me," he said, moving back down the ladder. "And if you say one more goddamn word about it, I swear to God I'll wring your little neck."

 

Jared clamped his mouth shut, jaw muscles flexing. 

 

"I love you, Jay," he continued, ignoring the young man's glare. "Even when you're a fucking _asshole_ , I love you. You're my boy. Maybe not by blood, but you're still mine. Nothing is going to change that, you hear me?"

 

Jared's breath was ragged, chest heaving from anger, fear and exertion. He wanted to be left alone, work through his anger on his own, but Jeffrey was once again in his face, making him listen. 

 

"My advice to you?" Jeffrey said, eyebrows arched for a moment. "Stay out of my sight for a couple of days."

 

Jared stood in the garage, watching Jeffrey leave, moving further into the house and slamming the door behind him. He told himself that this was all bullshit, no one really understood him, and he was tired of always getting the raw end of the deal. In the back of his mind, though, he knew very well that Jeffrey was right. 

 

He was terrified.

 

 

 

 

Jensen couldn't tell what words were being said, but he could definitely make out Jeffrey's voice doing the majority of the talking. There were a few thumps, but Jensen didn't go out to see if they were okay. 

 

After what seemed like forever, Jeffrey finally returned to the house. He threw a pillow and blanket at Jensen and pointed to the couch. "You sleep there tonight," he said.

 

With the blanket and pillow in his arms, he nodded his head and gulped. "Yes, sir." He watched Jeffrey snatch his suit coat off of the back of the dining chair and slam the front door behind him. A second later, the black muscle car came to life, engine roaring. The tires squealed as Jeffrey sped away from the house, and Jensen didn't dare move from his designated spot.


	21. Chapter nineteen

  
Author's notes: **bloody and evil thank you for all the awesome comments! They really appreciate it!**  
Three chapters today!!!  
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* * *

Jeffrey felt his stomach sink when Stevie opened the door to him. She'd changed into jeans and a thick pullover and he could see that she was upset still. But she smiled when she saw him and let him pull her into his arms and kiss her.

 

"Hey," he said, relieved. "I'm sorry."

 

"Jeff, you have nothing to apologize for."

 

"Jared's not likely to do it himself, though."

 

"He doesn't have to. Not if he doesn't want." She led him inside, shutting the door and leaning back against it. "I know you're angry with him, but I can understand why he behaved that way. And you know why he did it too."

 

"That's no excuse for how he acted."

 

Stevie touched his face then, gently. "He won't think of it that way. I've seen kids go through a lot worse while they were in my classes. And I've seen them go through changes that weren't even half as tough to adjust to. Most of them reacted a lot worse than Jared did tonight. He will come around, Jeff. I guess by now that he knows he was wrong and if you just leave him to think about it, to come to terms with it, then he will. I daresay having Jensen there will help. Young Mr Ackles is a sensible boy. In some things, anyway," Stevie added, thinking back to Jensen's evasiveness when she had questioned him about how he'd been hurt. "But I think he'll help Jared understand that there is nothing to be afraid of."

 

"Maybe. I guess I can...Understand it," Jeffrey conceded. "But still, I'm real sorry."

 

"It's okay. I promise."

 

"You're pretty amazing, you know that?" Jeffrey asked her, drawing her in close. Stevie grinned up at him.

 

"Of course I know. But you can tell me again." She reached up to kiss him. "Do you want to stay tonight?"

 

Jeffrey thought about Jared, sulking in the garage, and about Jensen, bedded down on the couch - his usual spot - and worrying about everything that had been said. They would both cope, he was sure, and Stevie looked too irresistible an option right now. "I would absolutely love to."

 

 

 

 

Jensen was asleep and dreaming when he suddenly startled awake, not sure of where exactly he was at first, or of what had woken him. He heard a shuffling and turned over quickly, opening his eyes and blinking to try and adjust his vision.

 

"Jeffrey?"

 

The shuffling stopped and Jensen realized then that it wasn't Jeff at all. He sat up properly, licking his lips, and watched as Jared flicked on the lamp at the end of the couch. He looked pretty rough and Jensen knew that he'd started to feel the effects of the earlier drinking.

 

Jensen rubbed his eyes, watched Jared sit on the edge of the chair opposite him. "You okay?" He asked.

 

Jared snuffled out a laugh, scrubbed at his face with both hands. "I am so far from okay right now," he said, his voice quiet and scratchy.

 

Jensen stayed quiet, because he didn't know what to say. Because he wanted Jared to tell him that he was sorry, that things would be all right. That everything would go back to normal.

 

"You gonna come to bed?" Jared asked, looking over at him with bloodshot eyes. 

 

For a fraction of a second, Jensen wanted to remind him about what Jeffrey had said, but then he looked again and could see clearly the hurt in Jared's eyes, the defeat in the set of his shoulders. "Yeah." He followed Jared out quietly and led the way up to the second floor of the garage. Jared crawled into bed fully dressed, laid himself flat on top of the covers, so Jensen did the same. He turned onto his side, spreading one hand flat upon Jared's chest. "Are you.." He stopped himself, blowing out a breath. "What happened with Jeff?"

 

Jared didn't seem to hear the question, or ignored it. Instead of answering he just stared at the ceiling. "You're honestly not leaving, right?"

 

"I'm not," Jensen told him. "I'm staying with you. Only way I'll ever go is if you tell me to."

 

"What if something else happens? What if I got myself in trouble again? What would you do then?"

 

"I'd stick by you. 'Cause I care about you. I don't know why I care so much, not after today, but I do. Can't help it."

 

Jared nodded, silent for a while. Then he covered Jensen's hand with his own, stroking his fingers. "I was a dick to you."

 

"You were scared," Jensen said, leaning across and kissing his shoulder through the cotton of his teeshirt. "And I'm used to people being dicks to me."

 

"Not like that. You didn't deserve that."

 

"Forget about it. I got my own back, right?"

 

In the absolute quiet that followed, Jensen could hear the distant hum of traffic noise from the highway and the familiar sound of music played too loud about four houses down. Before, when he'd been unable to sleep, these sounds had been annoying. Now they were almost soothing in their routine. He felt Jared pushing at him and rolled onto his back, surprised when the other man curled into him, making himself as small as he could. He laid his head on Jensen's chest and Jensen responded by settling one arm around him and holding him. He turned to quietly kiss the top of his head.

 

"Don't let me do that again," Jared mumbled, voice muffled by Jensen's teeshirt.

 

"You really think I can stop you? That's what I love about you, Jay. You set your mind to something, you do it. Even being an ass."

 

"Jeff probably hates me." He sounded tired, defeated.

 

"Are you kidding? That guy couldn't hate you no matter how far you pushed him. He's like... I don't know, but I don't think I ever saw two people as close as you are."

 

"Yeah. I guess."

 

"So are you going to try and get some sleep?"

 

"Are we okay?" Jared asked, lifting his head so his words were clear. "You and me? Jeff I can handle, but...I landed you a pretty good one back there. Said some pretty ugly things. Most people would use that as an excuse. It'd change things."

 

"I'm not most people, Jay. And, even after all that, I still.." He paused, not wanting to say the next words out loud, but not seeing how he could avoid admitting it. "I still kind of love you."

 

Jared glanced up at him, surprised, but Jensen simply pushed his head back down and told himself to stay calm. It was quiet a long time after that, and Jensen almost believed that Jared had fallen asleep finally. But then Jared moved his head, kissing Jensen's chest, and said,

 

"So we're okay?"

 

It was the closest he was going to get to an outright apology, Jensen knew. The closest he would get to saying to Jensen that he loved him right back. He accepted it, told Jared that they were going to be fine, and it was quiet once more.

 

 

 

 

Jeffrey woke, wrapped in Stevie's arms. He kissed her awake, wishing he could stay in bed with her all day. But he knew he had to go home and make sure things were straightened out. Stevie had talked to him and she'd made an awful lot of sense and now he felt a little guilty that he hadn't given the boy more warning, more time to get used to the idea of someone else in Jeffrey's life. He knew that Jared had been wrong, but he had also realized that maybe the blame wasn't entirely his.

 

Stevie kept him there with her a little while longer. Long enough. They showered afterward and Jeffrey dressed in the clothes from the night before, which Stevie had washed and let dry overnight. She wrapped a robe around herself and followed him down to her kitchen, asking if he wanted some breakfast before he went. He declined, but said that he'd take her out to dinner that night, by way of apology for the previous evening's ruined meal.

 

"Nothing was ruined," she told him. "Your cooking's great, since I never got a chance to tell you that, and the pie was amazing."

 

"I kind of cheated with the pie," Jeffrey admitted, his eyes crinkling at the corners as Stevie laughed.

 

"I figured," she said, winking. "I won't tell. And besides, arguments around the dinner table? Really captured the essence of Thanksgiving."

 

"I promise Christmas will be better."

 

"You think we'll still be together at Christmas?" Stevie teased.

 

"If I let you go then I'm a madman." Jeffrey kissed her, letting himself get carried away for just a little while longer before finally pulling himself free with an apologetic smile. "I'd better go."

 

"Yeah. I'll see you tonight. And Jeffrey?"

 

"What?"

 

"Bring your toothbrush."

 

Jeffrey chuckled, shaking his head as he exited the house and went to his car. The drive home was silent, so he could think about what he might say. He let himself in, unsurprised to find that Jensen wasn't on the couch. Taking him away from Jared had been sort of a selfish move, he knew. Unfair on Jensen, not Jared. The poor kid had done nothing wrong except falling in with him and Jared, and he couldn't hold that against him. Looked like Jensen agreed, since he'd clearly snuck out to the garage the moment Jeffrey had left.

 

Expecting to find him in bed with his boy, Jeffrey headed out to the garage, not worrying about disturbing them. Except Jared was alone. He was sat by himself on the battered sofa, with some kid's cartoon showing on his TV. He wasn't watching it though, instead he was staring intently at his feet. Jeffrey's first thought was that the action the previous night had driven Jensen away. That he had left because he was now scared of both of them, and would rather go back to his father's 'I told you so,' than stay here.

 

"Where's Jen?" He asked, moving around the sofa and sitting next to Jared.

 

Jared shrugged. "I woke up, he'd gone."

 

"You know where?"

 

"No."

 

"Oh." Jeffrey looked down at his hands, fiddled with the signet ring he wore. He turned to look at Jared and saw that the kid hadn't slept. "You got anything you want to say to me?"

 

"Did I fuck things up?" Jared asked. "With you and Stevie?"

 

"Much as you tried? No, you didn't. I don't think she's going anywhere and I don't want her to."

 

Jared nodded, gazing at the floor still. "Good." He swallowed, audibly. "I'm...I'm sorry. I was an asshole last night. I shouldn't have been. And you were right."

 

Jeffrey reached across, pulled Jared against him by his shoulders. "I know, kiddo. Truth hurts, huh?"

 

"Yeah." Jared sighed, rubbing his hands on his jeans. "Thought you didn't want to see me again."

 

"Like I'd ever want that. I was mad last night. I cooled off. How about you?"

 

"I already said I'm sorry," Jared reminded him. 

 

"You know what I meant. Think you can forgive your old man, too?"

 

"You didn't do anything wrong, Jeff."

 

"Maybe not. I just want to make sure we're not going to fight about this again."

 

"We're not. Stevie's real nice, I guess. She'll just never be Mom."

 

"Nobody ever will be. I wouldn't want them to be. It would hurt the both of us too much. But she's a good woman and she makes me happy."

 

Jared lifted himself up, looking at Jeffrey. "Yeah. I can see that."

 

Jeffrey returned the look, surprised. "Really?"

 

"Uh-huh. How am I looking?"

 

"Kind of tired. Did you get any sleep at all last night?"

 

Jared shrugged. "Don't remember. Maybe."

 

"Well, no offense, but it doesn't look like you did. You want to go grab a shower and I'll make some breakfast and then maybe you can catch a couple hours or something?"

 

"'m not tired. Or hungry."

 

"Okay. But you are in need of a shower, trust me on that one. Go on, go. I'll cook something anyway. Maybe you'll feel differently once you've cleaned up."

 

"Fine," Jared huffed. "Dad."

 

 

 

After his shower, Jared did indeed feel a lot better. At least on the outside. He ate a bacon sandwich, and then a second, having not realized he was so hungry until he started eating. 

 

"You think Jensen's coming back?" Jeffrey asked, taking his time over his own meal.

 

Jared's head snapped up. "Why wouldn't he? He told me he wasn't gonna leave."

 

"I just... He's not here. Do you know where he went, then?"

 

"I have no idea. He didn't tell me. I was still awake when he left, sometime before normal people are awake. He left his stuff behind. Just said he was going somewhere."

 

"You think maybe he went home? Maybe just to see his mom or something?"

 

Jared sighed. "I don't know."

 

Jeffrey frowned. "Fair enough. Aren't you even worried?"

 

"No reason to be. He told me last night that he loved me."

 

At that, Jeffrey nearly choked. "Really?"

 

"Hey, why's that so surprising?"

 

Jeffrey shook his head, swallowing his mouthful. He took a sip of his coffee and looked at Jared as he set the mug down. "It's not surprising that he loves you, son. Okay, maybe a little surprising that he still does in spite of last night. I'm just shocked that he actually got the courage to say it. Kid's not exactly the bravest boy on the block, is he?"

 

"I guess I must put him at his ease."

 

Jeffrey chuckled at that. "Sure you do."

 

"So, am I still grounded?"

 

"Yeah, you are. Only 'cause the parts are in for your bike. Harry called, said I can pick 'em up today. So if I go get them later then you can spend the night fixing her rather than going anywhere. Means you don't need my bike back then. You ain't having her back anyway. You gotta get that Ducati up and running next."

 

"You're letting me work on the Ducati?"

 

"Sure. I'll pay for the parts, you sort her out. Fair deal, right? And when you get her done, you do what you like. Sell her, keep her, whatever."

 

"You know it'll take a while, right?"

 

"I know. It's not like the Suicycle is gonna take long, is it?"

 

"No. Not if I can't have the Harley." Jared grinned, happy with the deal he'd been given. He finished up his breakfast, feeling brighter and lighter all at once. "You seeing Stevie again today?" He asked.

 

"Not until tonight. I was thinking you and me could spend the morning like we used to."

 

"Okay, but I get to-"

 

"I get to throw first. You owe me. And you can start with that."


	22. Chapter twenty

  
Author's notes: **Three chapters today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

When Jensen returned, on foot because he had walked from the bus stop three blocks over, he felt exhausted. He hadn't slept well the previous night, but that was hardly surprising. The arguments, the heavy atmosphere, and the subsequent insight into Jared's fears had been quite a mental workout. He had spent much of the night comparing himself to Jared and finding that they were far more similar than he had first thought. 

 

He got back, rucksack heavy across his shoulders, and found Jared outside the garage with Jeffrey, playing one on one basketball. There was a rusty hoop set up to one side of the garage door and, as Jensen approached, the ball sailed through it and Jeffrey let out a victorious whoop. Jared spotted him first, as he turned to retrieve the ball, and he straightened with a soft smile. Jeffrey looked round too and grinned when he saw him.

 

"Jensen...Must admit, I was gonna start getting worried about you."

 

"I'm okay," Jensen said, ducking his head when Jared neared him and threw an arm around his shoulders.

 

"Where you been, kiddo?" Jeffrey asked.

 

Jensen shrugged. "Around. I went to the mall."

 

"On Black Friday? Are you insane?"

 

"Yeah, I reckon I am. But I wanted to find something for you both. Kind of a late Thanksgiving present. A thank you for everything."

 

"You make it sound like a goodbye gift."

 

"It's really not, I promise. I just don't think I ever said a proper thank you to either of you."

 

"You never had to," Jeffrey said. "Seeing you as happy as you have been? That's been good enough."

 

Jensen hefted the bag off his shoulder and set it carefully on the floor, feeling a little self-conscious as he pulled the first gift out. Jeffrey chuckled as soon as he saw it, and even Jared managed a smile as Jensen handed it over.

 

"I figure if you're going to keep dating, then you probably need these. Your bed's gotta be more comfortable than the couch, right?"

 

Jeff nodded, holding the wrapped bed-linens against his chest. "Thanks, Jensen. You really didn't have to."

 

"Well, I'm sure Miss Kilworth will be grateful too. Anyway, I was going to buy you some porn, but the guy in the store thought I was underage so-"

 

"Brat."

 

"Whatcha got for me?" Jared asked, moving and wrapping his arms around Jensen from behind. He set his head against the younger man's shoulder, making him shiver.

 

"Well, right after I picked up my fake I.D.-"

 

"Ha ha," Jared interrupted. "Funny. I know you didn't buy me porn."

 

"Only 'cause you already have quite enough. I.. Uh.." He glanced at Jeffrey, found him smirking back.

 

"Hey, no problem boys. I should go inside and decide what to wear this evening, anyway."

 

Jared pulled Jensen into the garage once Jeffrey was gone, and then into his lap on the couch. Jensen let himself be kissed a while, then managed to pull away and settle into a comfortable position.

 

"So. You and Jeff sorted some stuff out, huh?"

 

"We talked, yeah."

 

"Everything okay?"

 

Jared shrugged. "I guess. For now it is. I missed you today."

 

"You got me all night. But... I saw Chris at the mall, and Dani. They asked me to go to the game tomorrow night."

 

"And you're going, of course."

 

"I suppose I am. Thing is, they want me to go to a party afterwards, too. One of Dani's friends."

 

Jared pulled Jensen in for another kiss. "That's not a bad idea," he told him. "You should hang out with your friends. Don't let 'em think that I've stolen you away altogether."

 

"They don't think that," Jensen argued. "And Chris knows how I feel about you."

 

"Oh yeah?" Jared asked, his voice only just above a murmur. He pressed his mouth to Jensen's neck, nuzzled against his ear. "And how's that again?"

 

Tucking his head down, Jensen smiled and called him a dork. "Love you. Even though you're an ass."

 

"Huh-uh. _Especially_ because I'm an ass."

 

Jensen bumped heads with him, laughing in agreement. "I guess that has something to do with your charm."

 

"It does. So... What'd you get that you didn't want Jeff to see? Handcuffs? Lube?"

 

Jensen felt his cheeks warm and shook his head quickly. "Neither. First I stopped at Body Fiends and got you these."

 

Jared's face had already lit up at the name of the store and when Jensen handed over the black velvet-covered box, he was grinning. He opened it up, immediately reaching to kiss Jensen yet again. He then leant forward, stretching his arms above his head to take his shirt off. Jensen watched him unfasten both nipple rings and slide them free. He took the new ones from the box, fingering the small silver eagles that hung from the barbells. Jensen found the sight of him pushing them through the holes both fascinating and horribly arousing. He shifted, feeling his mouth dry out.

 

"God, thank you. These are.. I really like 'em."

 

Jensen managed to tear his gaze from Jared's chest long enough to look up and find himself being watched with a knowing look. He swallowed. "They look good on you."

 

Jared fingered one of them, licking his lips. "Feel pretty good, too. You wanna try them out?"

 

"Mm. Maybe in a little while."

 

"Wait a second. You said that Body Fiends was your first stop. Where'd you go after that?"

 

_Here we go_ , thought Jensen. "I headed over to Eric's place."

 

Jared stared at him, eyes wide. "Did you-"

 

"Yeah. And I hope you're not going to be mad at me."

 

"For what?"

 

"I kind of took one of your ideas..." Jensen rolled up the leg of his jeans and tugged his left boot off his foot. He took off his sock and the bandage that was taped down underneath it and Jared leaned forward, smiling when he saw the five words tattooed around Jensen's ankle. "I figured it was appropriate," Jensen told him, shrugging. "What with you training me to fight Doug if I need to, so that he'll leave me alone."

 

"It's perfect," Jared told him. "Can I take you to bed now?"

 

Jensen laughed, although Jared was completely serious. "Why don't we wait? Jeffrey's out most of tonight anyway. Maybe we can go in the house later on."

 

"You planning on blue-balling me all afternoon? That isn't very nice..."

 

"C'mon. There's only four hours 'til he heads out to Miss Kilworth's. I'm sure you can manage until then. Work on the bike or something."

 

"Damn, Jen. You can be so cruel sometimes."

 

"Don't exaggerate!"

 

"I ain't! You bring me new nipple rings and show me your new tat and then you just expect me to go 'work on the bike'? That's cruelty right there. In case you hadn't noticed," Jared continued, taking Jensen's hand and placing it firmly between his legs, "You already got me kinda horny here. You really want me to go bash one out without you being there to watch me?"

 

"Well.. What do you want to do?"

 

Jared smirked, his expression a little dirty. "Quite a difference between what I want to do and what you'll let me do. Though I can think of a couple things that you might not object to."

 

"So long as Jeffrey doesn't come in.."

 

"That's why we're going up to bed. You might need to chomp down some pillow to stop yourself making too much noise. So come on, get up there."

 

"How can I resist an offer like that?" Jensen wondered aloud, as he got up from the couch and made for the ladder. Jared followed, and he could almost feel the glee in the other man's eyes.

 

Upstairs, Jared turned on one of the heaters he had and aimed it towards the bed. Jensen cleared the space around and in front of it as Jared stripped down and got under the covers. Despite the heater's efforts, it was still chilly, and Jensen wasted no time in joining Jared once he was naked too.

 

"Let me warm you up," Jared whispered, covering Jensen's body with his. His skin was hot, like it always was, and it radiated off him. Jensen moaned at the feel of him and Jared jokingly grabbed a corner of the quilt and shoved it against his mouth. "Ssh. You want the whole neighbourhood to hear us?"

 

Jensen bit into the quilt, chewing on it for a couple of seconds to make it soggy, then spat it back out and took Jared's mouth instead. Below the covers their feet tangled together, and Jared shivered when Jensen's hand came between them to toy with one of the new rings. He lifted his head and cursed quietly, the hairs on his arms standing up. Somewhere along the line, he realized, Jensen had found out that it didn't matter if he wanted to pull that little bit harder. It didn't matter if he wasn't too gentle because the slight twinge of pain seemed to turn Jared on even more. Like now, as he twisted Jared's nipple between his fingers and the other man hissed through his teeth, but didn't ask him to stop.

 

After a few more minutes, Jared untangled himself and turned onto his back, leaving Jensen to follow, to lean over him and tease his nipples with his tongue instead. They were already stiff and Jensen lapped at each one in turn, taking the eagle drop on one between his teeth and pulling on it until Jared grabbed the back of his head and held him still. He watched the skin stretch and pull taut, then released it and heard the clink as the metal settled back into place.

 

"God _damn_ ," Jared muttered, threading his fingers into Jensen's hair and pulling him up for a kiss. He coughed when he felt Jensen's hand form a tight grip around his cock, and groaned into his mouth when he started stroking. Jensen sat up then, looking down so he could watch himself jerking Jared off.

 

"At Body Fiends they had these... Patty tried to sell me this ring, but..."

 

Jared grinned, settling his head back on the pillow. "Yeah, she would. I have one somewhere. One day I'll find it and show you how to use it, yeah?"

 

Jensen nodded, not saying another word. He slid his thumb over the head of Jared's cock, pushing against the tip of it until he felt a smear of wet there. He was getting used to this; to the feel of Jared's dick in his hand. He was enjoying it more, too. Enjoying that he could get Jared off as quick or as slow as he wanted, as long as Jared was willing to cooperate with him. He just couldn't talk while he did it, though. Not like Jared, who often kept up a continuous string of obscenity and filth while he made Jensen come.

 

"Here.." Jared made Jensen stop and reached down to the floor for the KY he kept there. Jensen held out his hand and let Jared pour some over his fingers. "Okay."

 

Slicker now, his hand moved smoothly, coating Jared's dick in the thick gel at the same time. After several minutes, Jensen grunted, closing his hand more firmly. "Not gonna make this easy for me, right?" 

 

Jared grinned up at him. "Maybe I just want to save myself. Come down here.."

 

Jensen gave up, sliding his hand up Jared's stomach and chest as he leaned down until his face was only an inch away. "What?"

 

"I want to... Fuck. I don't know."

 

" _Jay_."

 

"No, I didn't mean.. Shit, Jen, you just make me want you so fucking much. You don't even know what you're doing to me."

 

"I got _some_ idea."

 

"Hmm. I noticed you're getting better at this. Bet you won't let me take advantage of you like I want to, though."

 

Jensen shook his head, and then let it drop onto Jared's shoulder so he wouldn't have to see his eyes. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. He felt a hand skim down his spine.

 

"Don't be. I know you're not ready for some things just yet. But some other things you are."

 

"Like?"

 

"You wanna get off me a sec? And lay face down."

 

Jensen did as he was told, because he trusted Jared completely. He shivered as Jared's hands smoothed over his ass, as his fingers dug in and pulled him open.

 

"You're not-"

 

"Relax, okay? I promise that nothing's going in you unless you want it to."

 

Jensen felt like his entire body blushed at that statement, but, if it did, Jared didn't seem to notice. Jensen waited while he moved and went stiff as he felt Jared's dick slide between his buttocks. He kept his promise and didn't push any further, but the feel of him there was still quite enough to get Jensen hard and leaking in minutes.

 

"Don't touch yourself," Jared warned, as Jensen tried to move. "I swear I'll get you off as soon as I come." His mouth was right by Jensen's ear and he kissed him there, hips stuttering when the feel of what he was doing finally became too much. He came, and came hard, and thick drops spattered onto Jensen's back as Jared pushed himself up with one hand. After a few minutes, Jared collapsed to the side of Jensen, who used the quilt to wipe off his skin before rolling onto his back himself. Jensen's dick was hard, flush against his stomach, and dark red with need.

 

"Holy shit," Jared muttered.

 

"What?"

 

"You're not gonna believe me if I tell you anyway."

 

"Tell me _what_?"

 

"How gorgeous you look right now. What an amazing body you have. How just... Looking at your dick makes my mouth water. I mean, fuck, what I wouldn't give..." Jared made a fist around Jensen's cock, squeezing gently and pulling upward. He only needed to repeat the move several more times and Jensen was already coming, too turned on by what Jared had done before, and what he had said just moments ago. Jared caught some in his hand and brought his fingers to his mouth to taste, while Jensen's cock twitched and spurted, his hips lifting as if still searching for Jared's touch. Jensen watched his tongue work between his fingers and whimpered. When Jared next kissed him, he could still taste the come on his tongue.

 

They lay there a while longer, Jensen slowly relaxing with each minute that passed. Eventually, Jared let him go and crawled out of bed, searching the floor for his jeans.

 

"Where you goin'?" Jensen asked, sleepy.

 

"Work on the bike," Jared told him. "You stay up here." He leaned over and kissed Jensen one more time as soon as he was dressed, and then left him alone. It didn't take long for Jensen to pass out, fast asleep.

 

 

 

 

Jensen grinned as Chris pulled open the door and looked him up and down. Dani appeared behind him, wrapping herself around him and casting her eyes on Jensen over his shoulder. He blushed at their scrutiny, but kept his head up.

 

"Wow," Dani said, after a long moment. "Good job you're gay, Jen, else Chris might have to start worrying."

 

"Oh, I don't reckon so, girl," Chris said. "Come on in, Jen. We got an hour before the game and Dani kind of wanted a favor from you."

 

"I think Jared might-"

 

"Not that kind of favor," Dani told him, smacking his arm as he came inside. Her hand lingered on the soft leather of his jacket and he stopped and looked at her while Chris just laughed.

 

"Your boy's right there, y'know?"

 

"I know. It just feels really nice, is all."

 

"Oh...kay." Jensen gently removed her hand and grinned as she pouted. He followed Chris into the lounge, with Dani behind him. Probably, he thought, checking out the view. He was in Jared's jeans, the ones with more rips than anything else he owned. He knew very well that there was a tear in the back, right below one of the pockets. He was wearing longer shorts for warmth and modesty, but he was fairly sure that Dani was still checking that particular area out anyway. On top, under the jacket, he had one of Jared's old shirts, too. Old meant tight, but at least it didn't have any holes in it. It was plain dark grey, with the Harley Davidson logo in black printed on the chest. 

 

He knew he looked pretty good in the old cast-offs. Jared had told him so before he'd left, after he'd delayed him going by showing him what the outfit was doing to him. Apparently the effect on females was just as good, if Dani's current expression was anything to go by. Jensen waited until she left the room to tell Chris that maybe he should let Jay take him out shopping sometime.

 

"If the sight of me in stuff like that sets her off even half as much as you have, then I'm totally up for that plan," Chris replied.

 

Dani came back with a large red holdall which she set down on the floor by Jensen's feet. He nudged it with the toe of his boot and looked up at her. "Okay, what's this?"

 

"This is the favor I want to ask you. You know I'm studying hair-dressing, right? And that I want to get into beauty school?"

 

Jensen chewed on his bottom lip, wondering where this conversation was headed. "Yeah.."

 

"Well, I kind of need to practice this hair thing that I want to do."

 

"Hair... 'Thing'?"

 

"Just bleaching, nothing terrible. I'll give you nice fair highlights, hardly noticeable. They'd suit you, Jensen. You have that kind of complexion and.." She trailed off, and sat right beside him, putting an arm around his shoulders and her face right next to his. "Please?" She drew out the vowels, batting her eyelashes.

 

"Why can't you do this on Chris?"

 

"Because he has a show tomorrow with the guys and they said he's not allowed. So you're, like, my last hope."

 

"Don't you have any girlfriends you can do this to?"

 

"C'mon. You know as well as I do that even the girls that seem nice in high school are complete bitches. They're all too image conscious and the ones that aren't wouldn't trust a cheerleader to touch their hair, because they think I'm one of them!"

 

"Right, right. So... What you're telling me is that I am the only person on this planet that you can ask."

 

"Yes."

 

"What's in it for me?"

 

"You'll look awesome when it's done."

 

"And?"

 

Dani thought about it, then her face lit up. "Sex!"

 

Jensen laughed at the same time as Chris said, "Hey!" Dani just looked at him innocently, then turned the pleading gaze back on and wrapped both arms around Jensen, hugging him. 

 

"Come on. Say yes. It'll take about half an hour and Jared'll love it."

 

At that, Jensen couldn't argue. He sighed, told Dani he'd do it, then ducked as she jumped up and cheered. "Okay, calm down girl! What do I have to do?"

 

As it turned out, he had to do very little. Dani dragged him into the kitchen and sat him down, then set about spreading towels everywhere in case of drips. She made him take off his jacket and his shirt, because she didn't want to risk ruining either, and after she got over staring at the edges of tattoo that peeked from under his jeans, she set about mixing up the bleach for his hair. It stank, and Chris opened some windows up and then sat opposite Jensen to watch.

 

He stopped paying attention after a few minutes, but there was foil involved and a lot of Dani humming to herself, and a cool itch at the front of his scalp. While they waited for the bleach to do its work, they sat and had a couple of warm-up beers - or in Chris's case, a couple of sodas since he was designated driver - and talked about who might win the game and how many assignments they'd all left to do at the last minute before school started again.

 

"Okay! Time to wash it off!" Dani took Jensen's hand and made him follow her to the bathroom, where she made him kneel at the edge of the tub. Chris watched, amused, from the doorway as his girlfriend showered Jensen's hair until it was clean. They headed back downstairs and, back at the kitchen table, Dani quietly trimmed his damp hair and brushed off his shoulders.

 

"How's it look?"

 

Dani eyed him critically. "You know what? It's hard to tell when it's still wet."

 

"So.. Dry it?"

 

"I can't. My hairdryer is at home. And Chris doesn't own one."

 

"And anyway," Chris interrupted, tapping at his watch. "We gotta get going else we're going to miss the game."

 

Dani passed Jensen his clothes. "Just wear a hat until it dries out or something. It'll be fine."

 

Grumbling, Jensen pulled his shirt back on. He shrugged into his jacket and pulled the collar up. Chris passed him a black beanie hat which he tugged down over his ears, tucking his wet hair inside it as much as he could.

 

 

 

 

By the time the game ended, Jensen was almost certain that he was going to catch a chill. He'd kept the hat on, even though it was pretty much soaked through, only because he had no idea what his hair looked like and he didn't want to show it off to everyone else before he knew. He waited with Chris while Dani got changed with the other cheerleaders, then they all got into his friend's truck and headed out in the direction of the party. 

 

In the backseat, Jensen finally took the hat off and tossed it to the other end of the seat, running his hand through his hair. It was still a little damp, but not too bad. He combed it out with his fingers and pushed it back behind his ears. "Hey, Dani... You got a mirror on you?"

 

She turned to him, speaking as she did. "What for, Jens... Oh." There was a long pause as she looked at him. "Wow."

 

Jensen swallowed. "What?"

 

"Uh. It's kinda... A little more blond, maybe, than I was really aiming for?"

 

He felt his heart sink. "How bad is it?"

 

Dani tugged at Chris's sleeve and his friend glanced in the mirror at him. Jensen saw his eyes go wide and he pulled on the wheel to set himself straight again. "It's pretty... Noticeable?"

 

"Shit. Take me home."

 

"Oh, c'mon!" Dani insisted. "It's not that terrible! So it's a little more radical a change than you thought it would be. It'll wash out, Jen, I promise."

 

Jensen ignored her, pulling on his seatbelt so he could sit forward and see himself in the rear-view mirror. He stared. And stared some more. "I look like a twink porn-star," he said, his voice flat. Dani slumped, looking disappointed, and he immediately felt bad for insulting her work. "Crap. Dani, I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"

 

"It's okay, Jensen. I can see you don't like it, and I can fix it first thing tomorrow. And if you don't want to come in to the party, it's fine."

 

"I never said that. I can just wear a hat or something. Right? I'm sorry."

 

Dani just turned in her seat and gazed out of the front window. _Dammit_. There was a reason Jensen was scared of girls. They always managed to make him feel bad, no matter how much he tried to apologize.

 

"C'mon, please smile. I'll go to the party with you. You know what? It's not that bad. I won't even wear a hat. I'll let people see it and I bet they'll love it."

 

"You don't have to try and make me feel better, Jen. Don't worry about it."

 

Chris reached across and put a hand on his girlfriend's knee. "Dani, Jensen's immune to your girly voodoo. He's gay, remember?"

 

"Asshole," Dani muttered, but she turned and smiled over her shoulder at Jensen anyway. "Okay. You come to the party and you don't wear a hat. Deal. And then tomorrow, I'll fix it right up. Unless, of course, you actually like it by then. I mean, maybe it's just the shock of it that has you hating it right now."

 

"Maybe," Jensen agreed. He sighed. He hated being played.

 

 

 

 

The party was already well underway by the time Chris pulled up near the house. They could hear the music from the road and Jensen was surprised no cops had been called out yet. He followed Dani and Chris up the driveway, ducking his head when somebody wolf-whistled at him from the shadows in the yard. Chris chuckled as he turned round, grabbing Jensen by the arm and pulling him into the house. Someone handed him a red plastic cup and he peered into it to make sure it was just beer before chugging it down. He wanted to get horribly drunk and try to forget about what he looked like.

 

Dani took his jacket off him and Chris's off him, and then danced away towards the stairs, holding them above her head. Jensen stayed with his friend as long as he could, but Steve appeared and dragged him off somewhere for band-talk and then Jensen was on his own, hiding in a corner, trying to look inconspicuous. 

 

There was a loud cheer from the front of the room and he looked up, wishing he hadn't. Doug Freeman had just waltzed in, the head cheerleader clinging to his waist, and was smacking hands with anyone who wanted to, as well as a few who didn't. There were some people who rolled their eyes and moved away, and Jensen frowned. He hadn't noticed that before. That there were other people besides himself and his tiny circle of friends who remained unimpressed by Doug's presence. 

 

Jensen pressed himself back further against the wall, pretty much hidden behind a bookcase, and felt relief surge through him when Doug headed to the kitchen and backyard without so much as a glance in his direction.

 

Chris found him shortly after that, and handed him a shotglass filled with tequila. "Drink up, Jenny," he told him. "You and me are going to get wasted."

 

"What about the car?"

 

"Dani told me to enjoy myself. Ah, I don't know, one of the girls is crying their eyes out in the bathroom already so Dani's sitting there with her, trying to calm her down. She said she won't bother drinking any more."

 

"Why do girls do that?" Jensen asked, taking the tequila off Chris.

 

His friend shrugged. "Mostly because of guys. Cheers." Chris downed his shot in one go, shaking his head quickly as he lowered the glass. Jensen did the same, almost choking on the burn of it in his throat.

 

"Damn, that shit is awful!"

 

"Keep drinking it, it's not that bad."

 

"Thanks, anyway. Think I'll stick with the beer."

 

 

 

 

Towards eleven thirty, the party started to move back inside. A few people remained out in the yard, but, really, it was too cold out there for most. Jensen had managed to score a spot on one of the couches and was squeezed in tight between a cute goth girl and a tall, skinny guy who was currently asleep and snoring. He wasn't paying attention to anything but trying to avoid goth-girl's hands when she started flailing them around, explaining something to whoever was sat the other side of her, so he didn't see Doug across the room, spotting him and making a beeline for him.

 

He didn't notice until Doug was right there in front of him, smirking down at him horribly.

 

"Ackles. Didn't know you got invited to prestigious events such as this. I take it someone told you it was fancy dress?"

 

Jensen watched him, warily. "What?"

 

"You seem to have come as Madonna... Or is it Victoria Beckham?" Doug laughed at his own joke, then leaned forward and tugged on the blond hair at the front of Jensen's head. "Christ, Jenny, you don't think that looks a bit gay?" He pulled on the hair, hard, and Jensen winced. Goth girl had stopped talking and was watching the pair of them with interest, along with several other people who were stood close by. "Oh, wait. Fuck me, that's right. I keep forgetting how you take it up the ass." Doug moved his hand, wrapping it round Jensen's throat and forcing him to stand. "Fucking fag. This party ain't for you, you little shit. Time to leave."

 

"No."

 

Doug stopped, taken aback that Jensen had actually dared to say that. "No?"

 

"Maybe it's you who needs to fuck off," Jensen said. The shock of the insult actually made Doug let go of his throat and he brought a hand up, rubbing at the sore spot. Doug got close then. Toe to toe, nose to nose.

 

"Say that again, you little creep."

 

Jensen smiled, seeing his next move in his head before he made it. "Think I told you to _fuck off_ ," he repeated, taking a quick step back and throwing all his energy into one sound and solid punch.


	23. Chapter twenty-one

  
Author's notes: **Three chapters today!!!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

He didn't know what the song was.

 

He didn't _care_. The alcohol and adrenaline in his system had fused and were throttling through his bloodstream like Bonnie and Clyde on a furious crime spree. He giggled to himself at the thought of Bonnie and Clyde speeding through his veins in a miniature archaic car, and took another swallow of beer. 

 

He didn't know what the song was, and he didn't care. He just wanted to _dance_.

 

Bobbing his head, Jensen looked over at Chris. He held his beer bottle up to him, new blonde highlights reflecting the flashing party lights of pink, blue, green and yellow. The disco ball that hung from the center of the ceiling sparkled and cast flashes of light over the walls. Chris watched Jensen dance around in place, looking utterly ridiculous. "Christ, he's pleased with himself," he laughed. 

 

From behind, Dani put her arms around Chris's waist. She rested her chin at his shoulder, snuggling in close. "He has a _right_ to be," she said, speaking over the loud music. "He just kicked Freeman's ass."

 

Chris laughed, reaching around to touch her, his hand squeezing gently at her backside. "I know an ass I'd like to kiss."

 

She giggled at him, shaking her head. "Kick, Kane," she repeated. "Kick. But maybe you'll get your shot."

 

He leaned back so that he could give her a kiss, albeit awkward. "Promises, promises." He looked over at Jensen, who was still mouthing the words to the song and bouncing to the beat. "Come on, Queen of the Hour," he called to him, teasing. "Let's get home. I’m halfway to drunk and you’re already there."

 

"Oh, come on!" Jensen called back. "You haven't even danced with me!"

 

"Why the hell would I dance with you?" Chris mocked, although he stepped closer. "I already _got_ a girl to dance with!"

 

"Ha, ha!" Jensen returned. He put his arms around Chris's neck and tried to pull him out further into the writhing crowds. The house was still packed, regardless of the late hour and the fact that there had already been a fight. Everyone was still feeling good. 

 

"Go on," Dani said, patting Chris's backside. "I'll run up and get the keys and coats."

 

Chris twisted out of Jensen's grasp, for the most part, and leaned down to give Dani a kiss. Before he could, however, Jensen hauled on him, his hands clamped around Chris's wrists. "Come on," he said. 

 

Chris kept trying, lips puckered in an attempt to reach her from afar. Dani was of no help, just giggling at them until Chris finally managed to lurch closer to give her a quick kiss before being yanked out onto the floor with Jensen. "What the hell is this?" Chris asked, watching Jensen move. "You never dance."

 

"I've got some pretty awesome moves, baby," Jensen grinned.

 

Chris laughed at him. "Jared's been good for you," he nodded as they danced around the room. "You never would have done this before. And you sure as hell never would have punched Doug in the face like that."

 

Biting at his bottom lip, Jensen danced, making Chris laugh harder. "I think I'm good for him, too," he said loudly over the bass of the music. "But know what?"

 

"What?"

 

Jensen put his arms around Chris's neck again and bumped foreheads with him. "You're still my best friend."

 

Chris smiled and let them share the close proximity, not caring if anyone else saw them. "Can't be," he said. "'Cause you're mine."

 

"Freak," Jensen teased, straightening again.

 

"Queen."

 

A few minutes later, Dani had said her goodbyes and gathered their coats and the keys to the car. They had all drank, but she was by far the least drunk of them all. She piled them into the car, warding off Chris's advances (for the time being) and drove to the little house with the chaotic garage that Jeffrey and Jared lived in. 

 

"Here you go, big man," Chris announced, getting out of the passenger side of the car. He moved the seat forward so that Jensen could stagger out, clutching at Chris to steady himself. "You're so fucking drunk."

 

Jensen laughed with him, snorting slightly as he chuckled. "Shuddup," he said, weaving for a moment. "I'm not as you."

 

Chris laughed harder. " _What_?"

 

"I don't know, go away," he snickered. 

 

"Go kiss your hunky boyfriend," Chris told him. "He's not as hunky as me though."

 

"Foxy lay-deh!" Jensen suddenly shouted in a high-pitched voice. 

 

"Call me later, Foxy," he said. "We'll pick a night to do a movie."

 

"Yep!" He left Chris at the car and walked up the driveway. He slipped through the front door and stumbled through the kitchen, backtracking enough to snag a bottle of water from the refrigerator. He opened the door that led to the garage and stepped down the stairs.

 

Jared was on the sofa, watching television. A bag of microwave popcorn sat beside him. He turned when he heard Jensen walk into the garage, and stopped in mid-chew. Jensen was standing by the garage door, chugging a plastic bottle of water. He looked different than he had when he left, and Jared knew it wasn’t only because of the alcohol the young man had consumed. "Jesus Christ on a pogo stick," Jared breathed.

 

Jensen snickered as he blindly tossed the water bottle aside. He moved to stand before Jared, as if for approval. "Good evening," he said, bowing slightly.

 

"You're drunk."

 

He nodded. "A little."

 

"What the hell happened to your hair?"

 

Jensen reached up, suddenly remembering what had been done before the big party. "Oh, Dani," he said, using his fingers to comb his hair down. "She's studying coms-tology. She did it. Wanted practice."

 

"You're blonde."

 

"I've always been blonde."

 

"Not _that_ blonde."

 

"You don't like it?"

 

"You look gay."

 

Jensen set a hand to his mouth, mocking. "Well, that's scand-lous and certainly untrue," he said. "Lucky for you, I'll make an exception."

 

Jared smiled, shaking his head. "You didn't pay for it, did you?"

 

"You don't like it."

 

Jensen had actually looked upset. Jared shook his head in apology, smiling a little. "I didn't say that," he said. "It's just...different."

 

Jensen went down to his knees onto the sofa cushions, crawling closer to Jared. He tried to bypass the bag of popcorn and ended up spilling most of it. He waited for Jared to move it and then straddled the man, sitting down upon Jared's lap. "Guess what?"

 

Legs stretched out and feet propped up on the coffee table, Jared looked up at Jensen. "You've decided you’re gay now?" He hooked his thumbs into the back waistband of Jensen’s jeans, fingers dangling down to the young man’s back pockets.

 

"Nope."

 

"What, then?"

 

"I did it."

 

"Did what, Nancy?"

 

He ignored the tease and kept right on talking. "I hit him," Jensen nodded. "Right across the damn jaw. He mouthed off and Chris was off talking somewhere so he called me a fag and then I popped 'im one. He went down like… Like a sacka shit."

 

"Chris?"

 

"No. _Doug_."

 

Jared looked a little surprised at first, and then laughed aloud. "You punched Doug?"

 

Jensen nodded, proud.

 

"Did you knock him out?"

 

Giggling, Jensen shook his head. "No," he answered. "But he got a fat lip. Mark Monelli said that there was a big purple bruise too. I didn’t see it, 'cause they pulled me off of him and then he lef'."

 

Jared set his hands at Jensen's sides and shook him, making a proud whooping sound. "They had to pull you off him!" he declared. "And I fucking missed it?"

 

"Yeah, but I didn't," he told him. "I was there the whole time."

 

"Good thing," Jared chuckled. 

 

"And now," Jensen said, pulling off his jacket and wriggling out of his Teeshirt. "I want some sex."

 

That declaration made Jared laugh boisterously. "You're going to pass out before you get it."

 

"Maybe," he shrugged, "but we can at least have a good time until then." He smiled brighter as he leaned in closer to Jared, closing his eyes just before their mouths met. He felt Jared kiss him back, tongues intertwining in a wet, warm display of affection. Jared's arms tightened on him, hands brushing up and down along Jensen's spine, slipping underneath the waist of Jensen's jeans.

 

Straightening, Jensen looked down at Jared, glancing across his face for a moment or two. 

 

Jared watched him, wondering what the other man was thinking of. He kept his head leant back against the back of the sofa, his gaze matching Jensen's. Finally, Jensen leaned down and placed gentle, nipping kisses to Jared's throat, moving downward even further. His back bowed as he bent to take one of the nipple rings in his mouth, his fingers first tracing the shape of the pink flesh. 

 

Closing his eyes, Jared lifted his head and set his chin against the top of Jensen's head. Jensen was a little more forward when he had a drop of alcohol in him, but it was like what Jared had said about the new hair: it wasn't worse or better, just different. He moaned into Jensen's hair and let the chills flash across his tattooed skin.

 

 

 

 

Morning arrived far too early. Well, to be honest, it was afternoon. Jensen didn't realize that though as he arose gingerly from the bed up in the loft, his hair standing on end and his freshly tattooed ankle itching like a bitch. With one eye closed, he made his way down the ladder, stumbled across the garage and lurched into the kitchen through the side door. He thought he saw Jared out of the corner of his open eye, but he didn't turn towards him. He made his way to the cupboard, got a tumbler from inside and poured himself a glass of water from the tap.

 

"Morning, Sunshine," Jared said cheerfully.

 

After swallowing his water, Jensen turned and looked at Jared, his one eye still closed. His head throbbed and his mouth tasted like cat shit. Not that he'd ever tasted cat shit, but he was pretty sure that's what it was comparable to. "Must you yell?" he asked, voice as scruffy as his face.

 

Jared laughed and stepped closer to him, kissing Jensen's cheek. He ignored the wince of pain as Jensen tried to back away from him. "What do you think, Blonde Bombshell?" he teased. "You going to be feelin' better by tonight?"

 

With both eyes open now, at least, Jensen sat down at the kitchen island, balancing precariously on the bar stool. "Nothing is going up my ass tonight, Jared."

 

Jared laughed, making Jensen wince again. "Jesus, aren't you a fuckload of hangover fun?" he declared. "I wasn't talking about that, if you must know."

 

Jensen concentrated on his glass of water, peering into it like it was the next novel by Stephen King. "Then, what?"

 

Moving closer, Jared pressed a kiss to Jensen's shoulder. "We're going out clubbing tonight."

 

Rather annoyed, and terribly grumpy, Jensen looked up at the man. "Are you certifiable?" he asked. "I'm so hungover, I'll be feeling like this for the rest of my life."

 

Chuckling, Jared shook his head. "You won't," he assured him. "I have the perfect cure anyway." He saw Jensen eye him again and laughed louder. "Not that. Though, I certainly wouldn't turn down any action."

 

"Go figure," Jensen snarled.

 

Jared moved from the island, rooting through the refrigerator for a second and producing a large plastic fast food chain drinks cup. He grabbed a McDonald's bag that Jensen hadn't noticed sitting on the counter, and set both in front of him. 

 

"There. Eat, drink," Jared told him. "Be merry."

 

Jensen eyed the cola and peered into the bag, finding a large stack of french fries. "You can't be serious."

 

Jared shrugged. "Read it in a book once," he said. "Tried it, and it worked like a charm." He turned on his heel and headed off towards the garage again. Now that Jensen was up, he could work on the Ducati.

 

"You read?" Jensen called after him, trying to ignore the sharp pain in his head when he spoke above a gruff whisper.

 

The soda was still cold from the fridge, and the fries were mostly warm. Jensen didn't really care to eat, so he started out with one fry and a sip of soda. After a while, he noticed that over half the fries were gone, and the only thing left in the plastic cup was ice. And he felt pretty decent, considering. He finished off the fries, three and four at a time, and headed towards the bathroom. He showered, shaved and tightened the towel around his waist. He examined his blonde hair, frowning and telling himself that it would fade, or at least grow long enough to cut off. Already, it looked a shade darker, but the ends were still near-white. He reminded himself to thank Dani next time he saw her, even though he hated it. He'd felt worse about how he'd reacted to the bleach job than anything else.

 

Ambling down the stairs, Jensen raked his fingers through his hair again, sniffling loudly through his nose. His headache was still there, but not nearly as bad as before. His sick stomach was mostly gone; at least he didn't feel like horking up what he'd just eaten. 

 

"Wow, look at you, Fancypants!"

 

Startled, Jensen turned in the direction the woman's voice had come from. He saw Stevie standing in the kitchen. A paper bag rested upon the kitchen island and a couple of canned goods were clutched in her hands.

 

"Mis-ses Kilworth," he stammered, alarmed. 

 

She giggled and stowed the cans in one of the cupboards. "I told you, Jensen," she returned. "You can call me Stevie when we're not in school."

 

He was torn between crossing his arms over his naked chest, or perhaps latching a fist over where the towel was folded closed. He hadn't been that naked in front of a woman since his mother gave him a bath nearly thirteen years ago. "Okay," he nodded, opting to drape one hand across his chest, the other resting at the fold in the towel.

 

"Relax, Jensen," she said, peeking over at him as she took a stalk of plastic-wrapped celery out of the bag. "You haven't got anything I haven't already seen before."

 

But you haven't seen mine, he thought to himself. "Right." He watched her put the celery in the refrigerator and inched closer to the garage door.

 

"I like the hair," she continued, straightening and moving back to the grocery bag.

 

He reached up and ran his fingers through his hair again. "Yeah?"

 

"Yeah," she nodded. She took out a box of cereal and a package of blood-red steaks. "Who did it for you?"

 

"My best friend’s girlfriend," he answered. "She wanted practice for her cosmotology class. What are you doing here?"

 

"Oh, Jeffrey had to run into work really quick, but he asked me to get some stuff for a meal tonight," she explained. "How about it? You and Jared going to be there?"

 

Jensen didn't say anything in return at first. His stomach twisted into a knot when he thought of Jared, unsure if the man would be willing to spend time with Stevie just yet. And as if on cue, Jared burst into the house from the side door. Jensen quickly turned to face him, a startled look in his eyes.

 

"You look like you're feeling better, Blondie," Jared smiled. He stopped short when he saw Stevie in the kitchen. His smile faded and his eyes grew darker with anger. "Where's Jeff?"

 

Stevie looked aplogetic, wishing that she and Jared could come to some sort of common ground. "He's off at work for a few minutes," she said. "He said something about having to check the gas numbers and log them or something. I don't know." 

 

Jared nodded, glancing her up and down. 

 

"We're going to have a little indoor grill-out later," she smiled sweetly. "It'd sure be nice if you and Jensen ate with us."

 

"Like the perfect little family?" Jared asked, a sneer to his words.

 

"Jay." Jensen's voice was a gentle reprimand, and Jared knew it. 

 

He looked over at Jensen, casting his eyes down to the floor for a moment in apology. He nodded and looked back over at Stevie. "We'll see," he said. "We're going out tonight."

 

Stevie nodded. "Okay," she agreed. "And if you do come to dinner, there's something I'd like to talk to you about."

 

Jared stood there, looking at her, and Jensen was pretty sure the man wanted to glare. Instead, he only nodded his head at her comment and took hold of Jensen's wrist. Jensen let Jared pull him into the garage, going with him willingly. He was headed that way anyway. 

 

"Well, you handled _that_ brilliantly," Jensen smirked, wanting to roll his eyes.

 

"Did I kill her?" Jared spat.

 

Frowning, Jensen shook his head. "No."

 

"Then it went _amazingly_ well." Moving over to the Ducati again, Jared started working. Jensen knew it was just so that he could be left alone, to work out what anger had bubbled up inside of him upon seeing Stevie again. "Don't ask too much of me, Jen."

 

Jensen’s eyelashes fluttered as he fought off the urge to roll his eyes again. He sighed and climbed up the ladder to get dressed for the day, what was left of it.

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen blinked. This was definitely not the kind of place he had expected when Jared had suggested they go to a club. "Sunday night, Jen. All the cool kids are doing it." Jensen had bitten his lip and refrained from reminding Jared that he was not a cool kid, because he knew the other man would argue. Besides, he liked going out with Jared. It made him feel different, and protected. Like he could forget his regular life and self even more and pretend he was someone with a different life altogether.

 

He wondered if he'd be able to do that here. He knew the club's name thanks to his brother. This was a college hangout; he doubted anybody in there would be above the age of 25 and, by the same token, suspected there would be plenty in there who really weren't old enough to be. At least he wouldn't be the odd one out in that respect.

 

Jared nudged against his elbow then and tilted his head towards the doorway. "We going in or are we just going to stand out here looking at it?"

 

Jensen nodded, reluctantly following Jared up to the door. His looks, charm and tough manner got them both into the club without a problem and as soon as they were inside and the door closed behind them again, Jensen felt bass invade his body. The metal stairway vibrated under his feet and the ends of his fingers tingled with the volume of it. Jared walked straight to the bar like he owned the place and got them both a cold beer. Jensen tipped his back in three long gulps, feeling like this wouldn't be a bad experience if he was just slightly toasted for it. Jared drank his a little bit slower, but not by much. 

 

They left the empty bottles on the bar and then Jared grabbed Jensen by the hand and started pulling him back into the crowd of moving bodies. "Oh no, no wait! If you think I'm dancing-"

 

"If you think you're not, Jensen? You're sorely mistaken." Jared turned to face him and put one hand around the side of his hip, tugging him in nice and close. Jensen stared up at him for a long moment before Jared bent his head and pressed their mouths together, his hand moving up and raking through Jensen's short hair. Nearby, someone wolf-whistled at them and Jensen was just about lost until someone shoved at him from behind and he stumbled into Jared.

 

"Gay club's next state along," someone snarled, a couple of people voicing their disapproval at his attack. Jared ignored him, although Jensen's eyes were wide with the familiar fear and he was pulling at Jared's shirt, hoping he might just drop it. They could have a good time without being obvious. Unfortunately, Jared didn't seem to agree. He just gathered Jensen in even tighter and ran his hands down Jensen's back, hooking his fingers into the back pockets of the younger man's combats. 

 

He leaned down, kissed against Jensen's ear. Whispered, "You are so fucking hot right now."

 

Jensen stumbled again as he was pushed once more and this time Jared took notice. He moved Jensen aside and reached out one arm, getting hold of the guy's shirt. "You got a fucking problem?"

 

The guy shrugged him off, got into a fighting stance. All hunched up and trying to make himself look bigger. "Yeah, my problem is I don't need to see you and your faggot boyfriend making out. I want that I'll go to a fucking gay bar."

 

"Don't let the door hit your ass on the way out."

 

"Real sweet, asshole. Thing is, we just don't like your type around here."

 

"Funny, you're the only one decided to say something about it."

 

"Maybe I'm the only one with any balls."

 

"Or maybe you're the only one who's stupid enough to pick a fight about it." Jared took a step closer, easily towering over the other man, and ignored Jensen's hand on his arm. "You touch him again, or say anything to me, you really are going to have a fucking problem." He poked the guy square in the chest, hard. "We clear?"

 

"You fuckin-"

 

Jared didn't let him finish. He just lifted his arm and swung his fist at the guy's face, knocking him off his feet. The guy fell back, people moving out of the way as he hit the floor, and clutched at his cheek. "Warned you."

 

The people around them cheered Jared on and when the guy from the door came over to see what was going on, a couple of girls intercepted and told him the guy had been bothering them and that the man in the black shirt had just been standing up for them.

 

The bouncer nodded and helped the young man to his feet, surprisingly lacking any of his previous bravado. Jared thanked the girls once he was out of earshot and then turned to find Jensen was watching him, all wariness and nerves. He cursed inwardly.

 

"Jen, I'm sorry. I know I promised, but that guy-"

 

"It's okay. Maybe we should go somewhere else?"

 

"No-one else here gives a shit. And besides, I like the music in here." Jensen just raised an eyebrow at that. He'd never had Jared down as being the type to enjoy this speaker-breaking, bass-heavy dance music. "You wanta dance now?"

 

"Told you I couldn't."

 

"And I don't necessarily mean the kind of dancing you're thinking of..."

 

Jared grinned, dragging Jensen to him until their bodies were flush with one another. He kissed him, once, then took a step back and lifted his arms above his head as he pulled his shirt off and hooked it over his belt. The weight of it made his pants ride even lower and Jensen tried to resist the urge to do something indecent when he got a look at the tattoo on Jared's hip. "Your turn," Jared told him. Jensen bit his lip, but unfastened the buttons of his shirt and concentrated on Jared groaning his appreciation as he slid it over his shoulders and off. "Oh, fuck, yes..."

 

Jensen's shirt was discarded on the floor and he knew he wouldn't see it again. He couldn't bring himself to care, however, because Jared was now running his fingers the length of Jensen's spine, making him shiver.

 

He was still nervous, and couldn't help but look around to see if anyone was looking at them again. But it seemed like no one cared. The hubbub was over with, and everyone had gone back to their own little worlds. 

 

Jared set his hands to Jensen's hips. "You're not moving."

 

"What?"

 

"Moving. You're not moving."

 

He swallowed, feeling rather claustrophobic. "No, Jared," he began. "You know, I'm not feeling much like dancing. Can we go?"

 

Jared wasn't about to let him out of this. It would be good for him. Leaning down, he spoke into Jensen's ear, his voice just loud enough for him to hear. "Just move with me," he told him. "Like you did the other night. Remember what I was doing to you?"

 

Jensen's eyes closed and a shiver slithered down his spine. He felt Jared's hand slip into one of his front pockets, gently guiding him to the beat of the music. Their hips brushed up against each other's. He looked down to see Jared's thigh between his, and felt another spark blaze through him.

 

"There..That's it.." Jensen had to agree. His body agreed too, as he felt his dick start to stiffen in response to Jared's movements. To distract himself from what Jared was doing to him, he decided it was time to retaliate in kind. Jensen dipped his head slightly and kissed Jared's chest, before licking down to one nipple and closing his mouth around it. It didn't matter if anyone saw now. He was getting Jared right where he wanted him.

 

Above him, Jared moaned and tugged one hand free, bringing it up to clutch the back of Jensen's head. He gripped the short hair there and pulled him up into a bruising kiss. Jensen simply replaced tongue and teeth with fingers and twisted Jared's hardened nipple between the tips. Jared hissed out a breath, his teeth clenched against the pleasure Jensen's touch sent coursing through him.

 

"Don't start what you can't finish," Jared warned him. Jensen only smiled in return. "You're not playing fair."

 

Jensen laughed this time. "And you are?"

 

"I never do."

 

"Maybe it's time I didn't either."

 

Jared grinned brightly. "Now you're getting it."

 

They danced for a few more songs, until they were both sweaty. Jared's hair curled at the nape of his neck and at his temples. Jensen's skin was slick, beads of sweat dripping down his forehead. They hadn't backed off of the occasional kissing or petting while they danced, and Jensen felt like his skin was tingling wherever Jared had touched him.

 

"We need to go."

 

Jensen looked over at Jared, curious. "Why?"

 

"We just do," Jared answered, slipping his shirt on. "Come on."

 

"We just got here a little while ago."

 

"First you didn't want to be here, now I can't get you to go?"

 

"Why do you want to go?"

 

Sighing, Jared reached out and took hold of Jensen's wrist, pulling his hand closer. He pressed Jensen's palm against the groin of his jeans. 

 

Jensen's eyes flew open wider when he felt the erection hard against his palm. "Oh."

 

"Yeah. As much as I'd love to, I think we might get arrested if we go that far." Jensen nodded, biting his lip. He followed Jared through the crowds and outside, where his lack of a shirt was suddenly much more of a problem. He moved closer to Jared, shivering. They'd taken a cab to the club and Jensen dug out his phone to call another one to come pick them up. Jared backed him up against the wall while they waited for it to arrive and crowded against him, keeping him as warm as he could with soft kisses and whispered promises. The cab had only been a few minutes away and Jensen was on the way to coming in his pants when it arrived. Jared stepped away from him and they climbed into the backseat together, their movements hurried and anxious.

 

Jeffrey's car wasn't in the driveway when they got back, and Jensen figured he and Stevie had eaten alone and gone back to her place. He almost felt guilty that they hadn't joined them, but then Jared reached across him and opened his door for him, just before he got out of the car himself. He opened up the garage while Jensen dug around in his back pocket for a twenty and handed it to their driver. "Keep the change," he said, not wanting to be outside any longer than necessary, and then dashed inside to where Jared was waiting. He was immediately pushed up against the wall as Jared set the door to close again, and then held there when the other man attacked his mouth with brutal, biting kisses. He returned them, just as desperate.

 

"Bed?" He managed to croak out, as Jared pulled away to catch his breath.

 

"Couch… I got plans…"

 

Exhausted, Jensen just about fell onto the sofa. The few drinks he'd had at the club seemed to have made his headache vanish though. He'd asked Jared if that was a sign of alcoholism. Jared had laughed and said, "a sign of a hangover, worry-wart." 

 

Now Jared was sitting down next to him, his hand rested upon Jensen's thigh. "You," Jared said, leaning in closer, "fucking blew my mind back there."

 

Jensen laughed and tilted his head back so that Jared could kiss him. He responded in kind, generously touching his tongue to the other man's. It was a gentle kiss this time, one that definitely hinted at the three little words Jared had a hard time vocalizing. Mumbling softly amidst the kiss, Jensen reached up and set a hand to the back of Jared's head. 

 

Backing away, Jared looked down at him, studying intently. His eyes glanced over Jensen's face, as if he were trying to memorize every freckle, the crinkles at the corners of his eyes, those long lashes, the flecks of brown and blue in his greenish eyes. Instead of speaking, telling Jensen how beautiful he thought he was, Jared leaned in and kissed him again, harder this time. His hand moved to touch Jensen's face, his thumb looping over the young man's jaw and pushing his mouth open wider. 

 

Jensen knew that kiss. It made his heart pound wildly, his palms sweat, his blood rush with adrenaline. His fingers tightened in Jared's longish hair as he returned the kiss. He felt Jared's teeth nip carefully at his lips, felt the man's hand sliding down his throat, over his chest, and along his belly, not stopping until it had wormed its way into his jeans. 

 

Commando. Fucking _commando_. Jensen didn't have a stitch of underwear on. And he'd shown Jared that at the club, just to make his blood race, his mouth go dry. 

 

Jensen's stomach concaved slightly, enough to let Jared in, and his back arched when Jared stroked him, held him, touched him. He tried to gasp, to back out of the kiss enough to catch the breath that Jared was stealing, but he couldn't. He brought his other hand to Jared's hair, moaning and doing his best to catch air between kisses. 

 

In a flash, Jared was pulling away, swinging down to his knees, propped up high and between Jensen's thighs. Jensen followed him as much as he could, sitting up straighter and closing the distance between them with the sudden need that Jared had created within him. He hooked his fingers underneath the hem of Jared's shirt and tugged. Jared raised his arms and let Jensen push the shirt from him. Jensen’s own shirt, a tight black affair that Jared was sure he had chosen just to drive him crazy, was still somewhere on the floor of the club. Fingering the eagle nipple rings, Jensen leaned in and scraped his teeth over Jared's throat, beard stubble rasping against his tongue as he soothed away the hurt he caused. 

 

Shuddering, Jared's breath caught in his throat for a moment. He reached up and raked his fingers through Jensen's hair, the locks a little longer than when he'd first arrived in Jared's life. He pulled Jensen away from his neck and then in again, wanting to feel the man's mouth on his throat again. He knew Jensen had no idea of how crazy he made him, how needful, how reckless and yet how careful. He gasped at the feel of Jensen's teeth on his earlobe and nuzzled into the young man's neck. "Jen," he managed before breathlessly kissing him again.

 

Jensen felt his jeans being tugged at. He looked down to watch Jared unfasten the button. Without being asked, he leaned back and lifted his hips, letting the jeans be stripped from him. Jared seemed to calm for a moment, reaching up to touch Jensen's face, his fingers skating over Jensen's lips, his eyes watching his own movements. He gently leaned in and kissed Jensen again, a wet, warm and hungry embrace that made Jensen know that Jared loved him. He felt Jared's hands leave his face, moving instead to hook Jensen's knees into the crook of his elbows. Jensen gasped slightly against Jared's lips as the man forcefully yanked him closer, his legs held spread apart.

 

Jared was gone in a flurry again, bowing his back and placing fleeting kisses along Jensen's midriff. He didn't stop, or even pause before taking Jensen's cock into his mouth, as if he needed it to survive. He moved deep and hard, letting Jensen hit the back of his throat and making him cry out. Jensen clutched at the couch cushions, bunching the cloth and foam underneath in clawed hands. His legs were draped over Jared's back, toes curled and pointed as he tried to find purchase enough to lift himself up into Jared's mouth, even though he couldn't possibly get any deeper than he already was. Jared's hands were on his hips, holding him as steady as he could, and Jensen noticed a valley between his shoulder blades, a place that, at softer, gentler times, he liked to rest his head. He let go of the sofa with one hand, setting his palm to the back of Jared's head. Somehow, feeling him move that way was getting Jensen off just as much as the feel, the sight of Jared's mouth on him.

 

With ragged breath, Jensen tried to speak, to warn Jared. "Jared," he barely managed. "Stop."

 

_Too fast. Too fast._

 

But Jared only mumbled to him, a growl that vibrated through Jensen's cock and sent him reeling. With glassy eyes, he looked up to the ceiling, jaw agape, and arched his back as he came harder than he ever had before. Jared didn't stop moving, draining him of every last bit of energy that he could. Jensen's own voice sounded far away to him, a steady _thup thup thup_ echoing in his ears. He could _feel_ his voice, vibrating in his chest as he moaned with each haggard breath he took, but everything sounded canned. He closed his eyes as he felt Jared move, crawling atop him to straddle his lap. He set his hands at either side of Jared's naked sides, gripping the waist of his jeans in his hands, and opened his mouth wide in a deep kiss. 

 

Jared's need had been obvious at the club, and he had managed to sate part of it. Now, Jensen pushed him back out of the kiss just enough to reach down and unfasten Jared's jeans. It was his turn; he wanted to satisfy the rest of the hunger rolling off of Jared. Awkwardly, Jared straightened out each leg and shimmied out of the jeans and boxer briefs he wore, not moving from his place atop Jensen. He knelt high on his knees, head bowed to watch Jensen look over every inch of him, no longer afraid to do so. He carefully brushed his fingers through the young man's hair, liking how the blonde looked in contrast to his own tan skin. 

 

Jensen set his open mouth to Jared's belly. His hands grazed up the back of Jared's thighs, around to his backside, squeezing the muscle gently, fingers dimpling the soft flesh. His tongue crept out of his mouth, drawing a wet line from Jared's hip over to the center of his stomach, where Jensen paused to press a kiss there.

 

Pulling gently at Jensen's hair, Jared made him look up at him, shaking his head. "Jen," he said softly. "You don't have to."

 

Jensen nodded. "I know," he answered. "I want to."

 

Both of his hands moved to the base of Jared's cock, steadying it. He wasn't sure how to even start, and to be quite honest, he felt rather foolish. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. _Do what you like done to you_. The thought sped through his head with amazing clarity. 

 

Jared watched him, ready to pull away if he needed to, to encourage Jensen to touch him instead. He felt his heart skip a beat when Jensen opened his mouth, his tongue sneaking out to take a tentative, timid taste. Jensen's tongue was hot and wet, sliding around the head of Jared's cock in a big circle. Jared's eyes drifted closed and his breath shuddered out of his lungs. For a moment, he let his head fall back as Jensen explored new tastes, soft textures and warm skin.

 

_He has to have done this before, has to, has to..._

 

He didn't know what he'd been so apprehensive about. Jared's skin tasted slightly different than, say, the skin on his throat. It was saltier from sweating at the club, and smelled sweet and musky. He didn't feel clumsy at all, even when he took as much of Jared into his mouth as he could. He heard small sounds escaping the back of Jared's throat, sounds that he knew were ones of rapture, and that fueled his courage. 

 

Maybe it was from the dancing display Jensen had given him. Or maybe it was from the curious, tentative licks that started out Jensen's first fine as fuck attempt at a blow job. Whatever the case, Jared felt himself coming undone faster than he had wanted to. His hand clamped around the nape of Jensen's neck, he shivered and warned Jensen. But Jensen didn't back off as he thought he would.

 

Jensen closed off his throat with the back of his tongue. He had tasted himself on Jared's tongue before, so he knew what to expect. He let the rush of warmth fill his mouth, then dribbled it back down his chin. He might have tasted it, but he didn't know if he was ready to quite go so far as to let it slide down his throat yet. The sounds Jared was making, though, had him thinking twice. He'd never heard such sounds come from him before, even with all they'd done. He assumed that what he'd just gotten was Jared's favorite, and the fact that he'd waited this long to let Jensen get comfortable with it all, made Jensen's heart swell with love.

 

Jared pulled away from him, body shuddering, and Jensen was able to get in one good swipe of his mouth before Jared pulled him up into a rough, breathy and needful kiss. Jensen's head was craned back, almost enough to rest against the back of the sofa. Jared's hands were at either side of his head, elbows slightly crooked so that he could lean into the kiss. Jensen spied at him through heavy lashes and couldn't help but think that Jared looked damn sexy that way. A growl escaped his throat, vibrating against Jensen's mouth. 

 

"No one else," Jared managed, lips brushing up against Jensen's. "No one else makes me so totally _fucking crazy_."

 

Jensen smiled, leaning his head back against the sofa. "Backatchya, Jay."


	24. Chapter twenty-two

  
Author's notes: Sorry for the delay guys...my laptop died, and I'm having to borrow time on my sisters..so updates might be a bit further apart till I get mine back!  
 **Two chapters today!!**  
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* * *

Sprawled out on his stomach, Jared snored into his pillow, his nose gently pressed to the side. Jensen watched him from his makeshift "desk" that he had put together; a mishmash of old milk crates, a giant cable spool, and a wooden plank from God only knew what. He smiled as he watched his lover, almost giggling to himself when he said those two words over again in his head. _My lover_. The covers had been kicked down far enough to barely cover Jared's naked form, had crept down to show the rise of his backside. Sunlight pooled at the small of his back, his spinal column shadowed and curving up to his shoulders.

 

_Home_. It was fucking corny, but Jensen had a sense of complete home. That's the only way he could explain it. Jared was his home and he didn't want to be anywhere else, ever again. 

 

Pushing his reading glasses further up on his nose, Jensen looked back over at his computer. He'd forgotten about his reading glasses, truth be known, and it felt weird to be wearing them again. Still, it would save him from a headache and Jared had already told him that they were going out for lunch, so he wanted to be clear-headed when that time came. 

 

He must have lost track of time and space, because he was suddenly startled when he heard Jared's voice speaking to him.

 

"Morning, Professor," he said. "Tell me you're not already dressed for today."

 

Jensen almost tried to duck out of the kiss pressed to the back of his neck, his heart pounding from the start. "Hey, yeah, I got up early," he said. He motioned to the laptop, shutting it down for the time being. "Sorry, I got caught up in stuff on here." He smiled at Jared, who was wrapped waist-down in the afghan that had been at the foot of the bed.

 

"You weren't looking at porn, were you? And if you were, how come you didn't wake me up?"

 

Jensen laughed, taking his glasses off. " _You're_ my porn," he teased. "I got looking up some stuff for that report on Mao Tse-tung I have to do."

 

Walking stiffly, Jared moved towards the ladder. "Stupid fucking name, anyway."

 

Chuckling again, Jensen watched him head into the house to get ready for the day. "I like your dress!" he called. 

 

Jared only grunted in return.

 

 

 

 

In the chair again. His heart pounded with excitement and adrenaline, making him feel warm and light-headed. The sound of the needle buzzing was something he was used to now. The feel of it piercing his skin wasn't nearly as bad as the first time. There was a twinge of pain here and there, but overall there was just a burning sensation. The tattoo would take a long time, and Eric had already made a deal with Jared for payment. 

 

"That kid could get the goddamn Titanic running again," Eric said as he wiped away a smear of blood on Jensen's arm. "I got a couple old Harleys in the back. Jay's gonna fix them up nice, aren't ya, kid?"

 

Jared chuckled, sitting at Jensen's head in a wheeled chair. "You got it, Eric."

 

"Okay, but let me pay you a _little_ something," Jensen offered.

 

"You got it," Eric nodded. "Five thousand dollars oughta do 'er."

 

For a moment, Jensen looked terrified. He glanced down at the tattoo and then back over at Eric. "Would two hundred dollars suffice?"

 

“Fucking fantastic," he nodded without a smile.

 

Jared leaned in closer to Jensen's ear. "He's fucking with you, Jen," he said softly. "He says that to everyone."

 

"I know." But he _hadn't_ known, and he felt his panic subsiding.

 

He hadn't been totally sure what he wanted to start off his sleeve tattoo. Jared had suggested a number of things, but nothing he saw was really anything he wanted on his body for the rest of his life. Finally, he'd seen something that Eric had just been drawing to put up as a possible design. The picture was of a koi fish, blackish-blue with all sorts of colors around it. There were a few old-art asian faces, bright blue splashes of water, green leaves, shading and lines of black. Not too much color to overwhelm, understated as a matter of fact, but gorgeous regardless. Jensen was instantly drawn to it.

 

"It fits," Jared had said. "You're a fish."

 

Jensen had chuckled at that and asked Eric if he would mind taking it down from the wall, even though it had just been put up. Eric gladly obliged. 

 

"You fellas will be my walking works of art," he'd smiled.

 

Jensen had liked that idea.

 

It would take more than one day to finish the tattoo, but Eric started it. The black outlines were first. Easier that way. Wincing, Jensen watched him work, taking calm, deep and even breaths. Jared was to his left, watching Eric too. He knew his way around the place, enough so that if Eric needed something, Jared could pop up and get it for him.

 

The tattoo would go all the way from Jensen's shoulder, down to his wrist. He'd already removed his watch, as well as his shirt, and had commissioned Eric for however long it took to finish the outline. 

 

"How long will this take, the whole thing?" Jensen asked, eyes downcast as he watched Eric close up a scale line on the fish.

 

"Depends on how fast you heal," he answered. "Mind if I ask why the fish?"

 

Jensen smiled and looked at him. "I'm on the swim team," he said. "I don't know. It just seemed to click when I saw it."

 

"That's how they work," he replied, concentrating. "Jared, run in the back and get some more paper towels for me, kid."

 

"Yep."

 

In a flash, Jared was gone. He came back a few seconds later with a roll of paper towels, ripping open the plastic before handing them over to Eric. Out of the corner of his eye, Jared saw movement past the storefront. He turned and smiled when he saw a gorgeous brunette slinking by. "Hey," he told Jensen. "I'll be right back." He gave Jensen a quick kiss, which momentarily had Jensen tensing up since it was done in front of Eric, and then was off.

 

Jensen watched from his seat as Jared reached out to a very tall, beautiful woman with either a very expensive wig, or one hell of a good hairdresser. She smiled brightly when she saw him and opened her arms wide. Jared leaned down just slightly to wrap his arms around her, going so far as to pick her up off the ground. She kicked back one foot, and he saw she was wearing an expensive pair of stilletto heels. She placed a kiss on Jared's cheek and touched his face rather tenderly.

 

"Kid, you gonna let me do my job?"

 

"What?" Jensen asked, looking back over to Eric. He had leaned to the side so far in the chair that he had moved away from the tattoo artist. "Oh. Sorry."

 

Eric chuckled. "You ain't got nothin' to worry about, son," he said. "That boy's sold on you."

 

He smiled at Eric, liking that the man wasn't as homophobic as a lot of guys tended to be. Especially rough and tumble biker tattoo guys. Manly men, and all that shit. 

 

Back inside the building, Jared whooped loudly and clapped his hands together. "Who wants lunch?" he asked. "I'm going to walk down to the Jade."

 

Chinese actually sounded pretty damn good to Jensen. "I'll pass," he said, regardless. "How'm I going to eat like this?"

 

Jared leaned into the room, bungeed by his own arms, fingers clutching at the doorjamb. "Maybe I'll feed you," he returned with a wink.

 

Eric grunted at that. "You say anything about getting Cream of Sum Yung Gi, and I'm going to hurl my Swiss Army at you."

 

Jared laughed loudly, followed by Jensen, and stepped into the room. He leaned down and gave Eric a big, noisy kiss on the cheek. "You want me and you know it."

 

Eric used the back of his wrist and arm to wipe off the kiss. "I _want_ my bikes fixed," he replied. "Not your sorry, saggy ass!

 

"My ass isn't saggy!" he declared. "Is it Jen?"

 

"It's really fucking important to your future that you not share that information with me."

 

He wasn't angry. Jensen could tell by the sparkle in the older man's eye, how much he really did adore Jared. They'd become close friends over the years, and they thought a lot of each other. Before Jensen could really tell Jared yes or no for lunch, the man was off, leather jacket open to the breeze that was increasingly growing colder as the days passed. He saw no sign of the woman that had been hanging off of Jared only moments ago.

 

By the time he got back, Jensen was laying down on a bed something like an exam table at a doctor's office. His arm was above his head, and Eric was following his blue guidelines, blackening them. The underside of the arm was more tender, and occasionally made Jensen growl out an impatient sigh of pain. 

 

"Sorry, kid," Eric said. "We'll take a break here shortly."

 

"Okay." Jensen found that under his arm bled more than the top of his arm, which was weird, but it did. He turned his head and watched Jared plop down in his chair again, bags and cardboard cartons of food accompanying him. He'd already dropped off a tin container of beef and broccoli to the woman at the front desk, as well as a parchment-wrapped egg roll. No other customers were in the store, and if they were, the other tattooist, Henry, could tend to them. Eric was all theirs.

 

"I got you the shrimp wontons you like," Jared told Jensen, who immediately raised his free hand, asking for one of the fried goodies. Jared handed him one and then dug into the bag again. "Steamed dumplings for the good sir," he continued, setting the tin container down on Eric's nearby table. 

 

"Mucho thanks."

 

"General Tso's chicken for me," he said. "There's a bunch of other shit in the bag. Help yourselves. You too, Candy!"

 

The receptionist smiled and waved a tattooed hand at him. "Thank you, sweetie!"

 

"Jay?"

 

He spied over at Jensen as he dug into his meal. "Hm?" 

 

Eric finished up his last line, wiped away the blood and mumbled to Jensen that they could break now. 

 

Jensen sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "Who was that lady you talked to?"

 

Jared pointed to the receptionist. "Candy," he said. 

 

"No, the _other_ one."

 

"What _other_ one?"

 

Eric interrupted, speaking around a half-eaten potsticker. "I told him you were crazy about him," he said, "that he didn't have to worry. Watch your arm, kid, you're bleedin'."

 

Jensen looked at Eric like he was a traitor, eyes wide with a mental shut UP. He took a piece of paper towel that was offered to him and held it between the underside of his arm and his chest.

 

"Oh, Trevor?" Jared asked, finally understanding.

 

"No, the woman."

 

"Yeah, that's one of Jeff's employees."

 

Jensen blinked at him, confused. "No, the woman you hugged outside."

 

"Yeah, he's a dry-waller."

 

"That was a _man_?"

 

“In a dress," Eric nodded.

 

"A fantastic fucking dress," Jared smiled.

 

Jensen was sure they were having him on. "You're telling me that beautiful woman that just flirted with you, was a man? In a dress?" 

 

Jared nodded, belching from his meal and then continuing on with eating. "Trevor McAllister," he said. "And he wasn't flirting. Well, he was. But we always flirt. Nothing comes of it. Oh, and welcome to the scary future, Jensen."

 

"Shut up," he half-smiled. He knew that sometimes men dressed up like that, but he'd never really met someone that did that. Although, by the looks of Trevor, he very well could have and just never known it.

 

"Trevor and Baby Jay, as he calls Jared," Eric explained, "they've known each other for...oh, for years. About as long as I've known you, right?"

 

"A little before that, yeah," he agreed.

 

"See kid?" Eric beamed, downing another steamed wonton. "You got nothin' to worry about. Jared's head over heels."

 

"Ass over tits," Jared said, grinning.

 

 

 

 

 

"That's all I have to do?"

 

He nodded. "That's all."

 

"I don't have to hurt anyone?"

 

Jared shook his head, eyes shaded by sunglasses even though the bar was dimly lit. "I'd prefer it if you didn't."

 

"Good. Because I'm not into some of that really kinky stuff."

 

Jared laughed, watching Trevor stand from the small, private table. Trevor was wearing a slinky red sequined dress that fit perfectly to his slight frame. His hair was real, not a wig like some of the other transvestites. The locks were curly, spiraling down his shoulders when they weren't tied back in an elegant knot. He wore slightly understated make-up, red nail polish to match the dress, and high, strappy heels. He was stunning, and if Jared had been into that, he probably would have been all over Trevor. He and the forty-something transvestite had been friends for so long that Jared couldn't remember a time without him. He was a great help in Jared's developing teen years, when he realized that some men, just as some women, were highly attractive. They had never taken their relationship further than friendship, however, regardless of the constant flirting they did with each other.

 

"Thank you, Trev," Jared smiled, watching Trevor start to move away from the table.

 

"Anything for you, baby Jay," he returned, speaking over his shoulder in a soft voice.

 

"You look beautiful, baby," he winked at him.

 

"I know, sugar," he smiled back.

 

Jared knew he could trust Trevor. And Trevor had no indentifying body marks, like Jared's tattoos. Sitting at the table, he watched Trevor saunter over to the bar. Jared took a swig of his beer and waited for the scene to unfold before him. Trevor -- Belinda, when he was out on a night like this, or when he was doing a Drag Queen show -- situated himself upon a barstool, using all of his assets to get the attention of the youn man that lounged nearby. Sure enough, those long legs of his worked like a charm.

 

Doug was clearly underage, but his family owned so much of the city that the bartender didn't bother with him. After all, what Dougie wants, Dougie gets. That had been his father's motto from day one, and it had rung true for the past eighteen years. Carrying an opened bottle of beer, Doug traversed around the bar, leaving his lackies behind. He had the walk of a man who was over confident, sly. Jared gritted his teeth as he watched him, annoyed by just the man's presence. Stretching out his long legs, Jared propped one foot up on the chair to his right and settled in to watch the show.

 

This asshole wasn't going to go back after Jensen. Not if he could help it.

 

 

 

 

"You sure Jared doesn't mind?"

 

Jensen shrugged his shoulders, sitting yoga-style on the sofa. "Nah," he told Chris, watching the man shed his jacket and drape it over a stack of boxes.

 

"Where is he, anyway?" Chris asked, picking up the six-pack of beer he'd brought, carrying it over to the sofa. 

 

Jensen shrugged again. "Out," he answered. "He said he had some stuff to do, that we should just go ahead with the movie."

 

Taking one of the beers out of the cardboard crate, Chris eyed him. "You guys didn't have a fight, did you?"

 

Jensen shook his head, spying down at the movie case. "No," he said. "He just kind of does this every now and then. We're not joined at the hip, he needs his own time too."

 

"Could've fooled me," he chuckled.

 

"Besides, wise-ass," Jensen continued. "I'd like to spend some time with my best friend." He held out his hand, waiting for Chris to give him a bottle.

 

Raising an eyebrow, Chris handed him one of the beers. His father had gotten them for him, figuring Chris was close enough to a man, and he could make wise enough decisions about alcohol. They wouldn't over-do it like they had the night of the party. Both of them had had hangovers from hell, not something they were ready to repeat just yet. "Out of pity?" he asked.

 

Jensen frowned, twisting the cap off the beer. "Okay, so you heard about the pity-friendship thing I said," he sighed.

 

Chris flopped down on the sofa next to Jensen, gazing over at him, his smile gone. "Yeah, I heard about it," he returned. "Your dad made it a point that I found out. And it really hurt my feelings, Jen."

 

"I'm sorry," he apologized. "I just assumed."

 

"Yeah, you know what happens when you assume."

 

"You make an ass..."

 

"...out of you and me," Chris nodded, speaking in tandem with Jensen. He slapped a hand onto Jensen's knee, shaking him gently. "I'm not usually a proud guy, Jen," he continued, "but I like to think I'm an excellent judge of character. I'm your friend because I like you, not because I pity you. You mean a lot to me."

 

Jensen stared over at him, hazel-green eyes glittering in the low light of the garage. In a teasing motion, he leaned into Chris, heading straight for the other man's lips. He was rewarded with a palm to his face, shoving him backwards, and Chris calling him a loser. He laughed and sat up straight again, taking a good swallow from his beer. 

 

"And what the hell is this?" Chris asked, reaching in front of Jensen to push the man's T-shirt sleeve aside.

 

"Something I'm having done."

 

Chris laughed aloud, leaning back in his seat and raising his beer bottle to his lips. "Your father would have a fucking fit."

 

Jensen laughed too. "I know," he agreed. "I kind of want to show him just to see the look on his face."

 

Chris mocked Alan, dropping his jaw and widening his eyes as much as he could. His best dumbfounded, shocked, stunned expression. "Jensen Ross! What is the goddamned meaning of this?"

 

"Fuck, don't! He actually would kill me, wouldn't he?"

 

"Yeah," Chris said, patting Jensen's shoulder. "Probably."

 

 

 

 

By eleven o'clock, Doug was drunk enough to be unsteady on his feet, his speech slurred, and his eyes blinking independently from one another. He was leaning in closer and closer to Trevor -- who was totally successful and convincing as Belinda. They had moved to a corner table to "get to know each other." All that really involved for Doug was kissing Belinda and pressing her hand to his groin. Trevor had been around long enough to know how to avoid getting groped and found out that he was just a man in a dress. He used all those tactics on Doug, to keep him under control. 

 

The kisses were hot, Jared had to admit. As much as he hated Doug, the man had some skill, it seemed. But even though he was slightly turned on by Belinda and Doug, he couldn't help thinking of Jensen and how he would like to kiss him that way. How Jensen would taste when their tongues touched. What Jensen's throat smelled like after a night of drinking and making out. What the sheets and blankets would smell like after a night of grappling for dominance with each other. 

 

Clearing his throat, Jared refocused his thoughts, deciding that he didn't particularly feel like walking out of the place with a raging hard-on. He shifted in his chair and adjusted his sunglasses, still shading his eyes. He saw Belinda look over at him as Doug dipped his head to kiss her neck. She nodded just slightly and whispered into Doug's ear. A few moments later, they were arising from the booth and heading to the bar to pay their tab. Doug paid for Belinda's tab as well as his own, keeping his arm slung around her waist the entire time. He nodded a quick goodbye to his friends, who still sat nearby like dogs waiting to be tossed a scrap or two. They watched him go and then turned back to their conversation. Apparently, this was a regular thing for them. Jared kept his head low as he watched Doug leave, holding Belinda close. Once the couple was out the front doors to the bar, he got up, threw a couple of bills onto a waitress's tray and followed them out the door.

 

Doug had a sporty car -- a new Dodge Charger, Jared noted. He chuckled quietly to himself at the sight, believing that the new Chargers were shit compared to the old, classic cars. Just like a spoiled rich boy to think he knew what a real car was. Trevor was backed up against it now, working the Belinda vibe, as Doug kept him caged in his arms, pinned to the car. 

 

Jared walked up behind Doug, not bothering to mask his footsteps. Doug was so into kissing Belinda, that he didn't even hear him. Jared stood motionless for a moment, watching through his glasses, and then reached over to tap Doug on the shoulder. The first time didn't work. The second time, Jared tapped harder, and finally got Doug to break the embrace. 

Annoyed, Doug turned around. "What the fuck do you--" 

 

Before he could finish his sentence, Jared punched the teen square on the jaw. Instantly, Doug's eyes rolled back into his head and he crumpled to the parking lot floor. Trevor, unshaken by the incident, adjusted his bra strap and swished his hair off his shoulders. "About time," he said in a voice just slightly too low. 

 

"Sorry," Jared smiled. "You looked like you were having a good time."

 

"Did I mention how much you're going to owe me for this?"

 

"Repeatedly."

 

 

 

 

 

The movie was loud, explosions, riots and automatic gunfire sounding through the garage. Jensen and Chris sat wide-eyed on the sofa, a bowl of popcorn that Jeffrey had made sitting between them. Four empty bottles of beer sat upon the old, scarred coffee table, and two more sat at their feet, still half-full. There was a wet sound, and blood gushed across the screen.

 

"Oh, ew!" Jensen cried out. "That was so gross."

 

"That was awesome," Chris laughed, his head rocking back against the sofa. His arm was draped along the back, too, lazing at Jensen's back in a friendly, used-to-each-other gesture. It didn't matter that once, when they were younger, Jensen had had a crush on Chris. They never let that make things awkward between them. 

 

The door to the house opened and heavy-soled boots thumped loudly upon the hollow stairs. "Hey." 

 

Jensen and Chris turned, finding Jared there, holding his motorcycle helmet, gloves peeking out the top. "Hey," they both said to him.

 

"Did you have fun?" Jensen asked.

 

Jared nodded. "Did I miss the movie?"

 

"It's about halfway through," Chris told him. "We started it late. Want us to start it over?"

 

"Nah," he answered. "Jen, your computer on upstairs?"

 

Jensen nodded. "Yeah," he said. "Why?"

 

"I gotta check something on eBay," he replied. "I'll be down in a little while."

 

"Okay."

 

They went back to the movie, oblivious to the fact that Jared carried his bike helmet up the ladder with him. He shed his leather jacket and sat down at the small area Jensen had used for his laptop, printer and scanner. Peeking behind him to make sure that Jensen and Chris were still engrossed in the movie, Jared pulled Jensen's Polaroid camera from inside the helmet. It was bulky and barely fit, but the gloves had done their job in covering what didn't fit into the helmet. He then reached into his back jean pocket and pulled out a number of Polaroids. He stashed Jensen's camera where it usually was, and flipped open the scanner. A few more clicks of the mouse, and the scanner whirred to life. He glanced back at Jensen and Chris one more time, but the sounds of the movie drowned out anything he was doing in the loft.

 

Turning his attention to the computer, Jared opened the pirated copy of a paint program he'd installed on Jensen's computer to help him with some graphic work for art class, and cropped out each one of the Polaroids. Trevor's face wasn't visible. The only one really identifiable was Doug, passed out on a ratty old motel comforter. The compromising positions Doug had been put in were perfect. In a few of them, he was touching Trevor, who was perfectly fine with having his hung-like-a-horse and fully erect cock photographed. Jared had to smile at the shots he'd gotten. This was going to be good assurance that the bully would leave Jensen alone. After he was done scanning the pictures, Jared saved the JPEGs and took them off the scanner. He pocketed them again and headed down to watch the rest of the movie with Jensen and Chris.


	25. Chapter twenty-three

  
Author's notes: **Two chapters today!!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

Jensen came inside from saying goodbye to Chris to find that Jared was on the upper level again, sat in front of his computer.

 

"You online again?" He asked, as he made his way up the ladder. He saw Jared close whatever he'd had open down and then saw him take a CD from the drive. "What's that?"

 

"Burning some porn for when you ain't here tomorrow," Jared told him, not looking round.

 

Jensen chuckled, turning towards the bed and starting to undress as he did. Jared glanced round at him to make sure he wasn't watching any more, then hid the CD under a stack of others - just in case Jensen got curious - before deleting all the files from the computer. He didn't feel too guilty about lying to him. If he had to, he'd reveal what plan B was, but he hoped he wouldn't need to. After all, Doug had had his ass handed to him once by Jensen. Maybe he wouldn't try his luck again. Right, thought Jared. And Satan might start eating icepops.

 

"Jay?" Jensen said, as he was turning the computer off.

 

"Yeah?"

 

"I'm here _now_..." 

 

At that Jared turned, grinning when he saw that Jensen was naked and under the covers, holding up one edge as he waited. Jared stripped down quickly, diving under the covers and attacking Jensen's chest and stomach with his mouth as soon as he was level. Jensen just laughed at him, pushing at his head to make him move. He did, after a while, moving up so he was laid next to Jensen, the younger man in his arms. "You want to make some porn of our own, huh?" His voice was low and growly, making Jensen shudder.

 

"I don't know. I was thinking it might be kind of nice just to fall asleep like this."

 

"I guess. Maybe I'll blow you in the morning. Send you off to school in a good mood."

 

Jensen simply smiled, clinging on to Jared a little tighter. "Maybe."

 

 

 

 

Tuesday morning was back into the routine of school and Jensen found it difficult to drag himself away from Jared so that he could go and shower and get ready. He wished he could stay in bed at least another two hours, but Jeffrey was taking him in today and he didn't want to make the man late for work. So he forced himself out of bed, amidst grumbles of discontent from Jared, and gathered his uniform together.

 

"When do you guys break up again?" Jared asked, as Jensen pulled on some shorts so he could go in the house.

 

"Impatient much?" Jensen retorted. "I'll be back at four, and as soon as I'm done studying I'm all yours for the night."

 

"Mm, okay. Don't let them give you too much homework."

 

Jensen promised he wouldn't, though he knew that when he returned from school it was more than likely that Jared would be too busy working on the bikes to notice. He had Eric's being dropped off that afternoon so the garage was going to be pretty crowded by the time Jensen came back. He didn't mind, though. The longer Jared left him in peace to start with, the more fun they could have when he was done. With his things draped over one arm, he opened the door to the kitchen and went straight in without looking. 

 

"Good morning," Jeffrey said, as someone else echoed him and then laughed.

 

Jensen looked up, eyes wide, and immediately flushed red. Stevie just laughed some more and looked down into her coffee. "Uh. Shower," was all Jensen managed before he was racing for the stairs, taking them two at a time. Jeffrey called something up after him, but he didn't hear. He really had to try and remember to stop wandering around in his underwear from now on. And he _really_ had to hope Jared didn't even think of following him.

 

When he was showered and dressed, he headed back down. Stevie was stood by the counter, a towel in her hands, drying dishes as Jeffrey washed them. Jensen smiled at her, nervous, and gathered up his school books from where they'd been shifted. His bag was in the hallway and he stuffed them inside as Jeffrey tipped out the dirty dishwater and called through to ask if he was ready.

 

"Just need my shoes," he called back.

 

"Okay. We're giving Stevie a lift to school too. I can drop you off a block over if you want, though." It was said laughingly, like he didn't really mean the offer, so Jensen didn't reply. He'd just have to hope that nobody saw him. But he knew what his luck was like. He tensed up when he heard the garage door open, and saw Jared stop short in the doorway when he saw who was in the kitchen. 

 

"Right," Jared said, his voice flat. Nobody spoke, though Stevie glanced at Jeffrey to see if he would say anything. He was busy watching Jared who, after a long and awkward silence, nodded and turned around, shouting a 'see you later!' at Jensen over his shoulder. Jensen didn't get a chance to say anything back before the door slammed behind him.

 

"You know, he's getting better," he said, just to break the silence. Jeffrey just grunted a response, only smiling again when Stevie neared him and kissed his scruffy cheek.

 

"Time to go."

 

 

 

 

Jensen pretty much got away with it at the school gates. They were early. Way earlier than any buses arrived, since Stevie had to go and get ready for her class. Jensen got out of the back-seat, having to wait while Stevie kissed Jeffrey goodbye in the front before he could escape. Since the grounds were empty so far, he decided to walk into school with her. It wouldn't look so weird now that Jeffrey was gone, anyway. Just Jensen being his usual teacher's-ass-kissing self, right?

 

"So, you and Jeffrey. Is that like.."

 

Stevie eyed him, and smiled. "Yeah. I think so. You think Jared'll be okay with that?"

 

Jensen shrugged. "Eventually."

 

"So what about you and Jared? I never really got the chance to ask how come you're there and never at home. Figured I shouldn't, but.. Well."

 

"I guess now you can." He looked across at her, and she stopped at the expression on his face. "My Dad threw me out, pretty much. As for winding up there, I don't know. Fate?"

 

"Life throws us some strange things to deal with, that's for sure. Did he throw you out because you're gay?"

 

Jensen flinched at the word. It sounded odd to hear her say it out loud. Different than his best friend saying it. Scarier, somehow. He quickly pulled himself together, shook his head. "He threw me out because he's an asshole."

 

"I doubt-"

 

"You haven't met my father yet. I hope you don't ever have to. He just... I don't know. Nobody and nothing is good enough for him. You know?"

 

"My grandmother was the same," Stevie told him. "She hated that I went into teaching. It doesn't exactly pay well. And it's not something you can brag about to your buddies. Fortunately for me, my Dad didn't have a problem telling her what he thought. She was a strong-willed woman, but she raised an even stronger-willed son."

 

Jensen just nodded, not really knowing what to say to that. 

 

"I think your father will find out that he's done the same, maybe without meaning to."

 

"Oh, believe me, I'm not a strong person. It's just being with Jared that makes it seem that way sometimes. But.. I don't think I've changed."

 

"Really? You should try reading your older essays and then look at what you hand in now. Even just a few weeks have changed you. You'll see."

 

They'd reached Stevie's classroom by then, so Jensen didn't try and argue with her. She said she'd see him later and he left her to it and headed to his locker. He thought about her question as he put his bag in, taking out only the books he'd need for the first class. What about him and Jared? Jeffrey and Stevie, they could end up married and moving in together. But what could he and Jared do? He guessed that eventually they'd take the next step with their sexual relationship. When he felt ready. But after that, there really wasn't anywhere else to go. Just grow old together, he supposed. If that was what Jared even wanted.

 

Jensen started as someone smacked his shoulder, and turned to find Chris watching him, his face split wide with a grin. "Looked like you were deep in thought there, Jen. You all right?"

 

"I'm good. Sorry, was I ignoring you?"

 

"Not much. I gotta shoot. We're having this quiz in Chem today and I need to cram some more facts in before class starts. Meet you at lunch?"

 

"Sure thing."

 

 

 

 

As it turned out, lunch wasn't such a sure thing. Before the break, Jensen was passed a message to go and speak to the swimming coach over in the pool. He wondered what it was about all the way there, feeling more nervous that he was about to be thrown off the team or something equally unlikely. There were no swim meets scheduled now, not until well into the following year. They would have practice once a month, and were encouraged to swim in their own time, but that was it.

 

The lights in the changing room were off when he arrived, but the office light at the far end of the room was on. The floor was wet and slippery as he started making his way between the rows of lockers. As he passed a gap between a couple of them, something was thrown out at him and he just had time to register that it had been a fist before he was skidding back into the lockers opposite and then falling flat on his ass. He tasted blood in his mouth and made to get up, but then Doug was there, holding him down by the shoulders as he crouched over him. Jensen brought his knee up, trying to dislodge him, and it worked. Doug fell back and Jensen thought he could get up and keep fighting, until two more sets of hands pushed him back down to the floor.

 

Of course. Doug wouldn't do this alone.

 

"Time to teach you a lesson," Doug hissed, right in his face. Jensen shut his eyes, struggling hard against the arms holding him down. He got one arm free and flailed out with his fist, connecting with something. He heard a grunt and then his head was slammed back against the lockers and his vision clouded for half a second. "You're a lot fightier than you used to be..." Doug remarked, before punching him hard in the face. Jensen's left eye teared up immediately, and he kicked out, but hit nothing.

 

Doug's other hand caught him on the jaw, then another punch to the face landed just above his right eye. The last one hit the corner of his mouth and he felt a tooth come loose inside it.

 

Whoever was holding his left arm dropped it, while the guy holding his other wrist gripped even tighter. He heard someone speaking, but it sounded tinny and strange. "Doug, maybe you should-"

 

"Shut up. No-one asked you. Get his shirt open."

 

There was a pause, as if the guy was considering arguing, but then Jensen felt the air shift and he opened one eye just a crack. Enough to see one of Doug's friends leaning into his field of vision. He felt weak, but he still tried to wriggle free as they started unbuttoning his shirt. His tie was yanked from his neck and then his shirt was spread wide. Doug poked him hard in the hip, right over the lines of his tattoo.

 

"You like tattoos, huh?"

 

Blankly, he watched Doug staring at him. Wondered what the hell he was saying.

 

"Gonna give you a real special one, Jenny. Your boyfriend's gonna fucking love it."

 

 

 

 

They'd dragged him into one of the showers and set it going, and they'd kicked him as they left. Jensen had thought that was funny, in a way where it really wasn't. He'd wanted to say, "Sure, kick a man while he's down," but he couldn't get his mouth to work. After a few minutes he managed to reach up enough to turn the water off, and fell into the silence. He stayed where he was, still and uncomfortable, because he was pretty sure that nobody was coming to the pool today. He thought that maybe if he just rested a while, he'd be able to gather up enough energy to get up and out. Maybe get home. When he heard the door at the far end of the locker room slam open he kicked the door to the shower cubicle shut, keeping his foot pressed hard against it.

 

Chris saw the spots of blood on the floor first. His eyes were drawn to it, so out of place on the white tile. "Jen?" He looked between the lockers, worrying at his bottom lip with his teeth. "Jensen!" Fearing the worst, he headed straight for the pool, hoping to God he was wrong. He scanned the water, but couldn't see any sign of his friend. The noise inside the pool room was distracting and he went back to the locker room, calling Jensen's name again. Headed for the showers and frowned when he saw one with its door pushed shut. "Jen-"

 

"Don't come in."

 

"Shit. You sound... Open up." 

 

There was a slick sound as Jensen moved, and a sniffle. "No. Don't come in."

 

"You need me to fetch someone?"

 

"No. I just want to be left alone." He sounded awful. Bunged up, tired and defeated. Chris was sure he'd never heard him so low.

 

"Tough luck. You're opening that door right now." Chris leant against it. "C'mon, man, I'm _worried_."

 

There was a stretch of silence then a loud squeak as Jensen moved his foot away from the door and it fell a few inches open. Chris pushed it the rest of the way and eased his body around it, going dead still when he saw the state Jensen was in. There was blood dried under his nose and his mouth, his left eye was puffy and the right was only a little better. He was holding his shirt closed, one hand bunched tightly around the cotton. Chris knelt down, ignoring the wet floor, and reached out to him. Jensen just hugged himself even tighter.

 

"What'd he do to you, man?" He spoke softly, and gently moved Jensen's hand, pulling his shirt open. He hadn't expected what he found. Doug had written one word - F A G - across Jensen's stomach, the black sharpie he'd used meaning it wouldn't just wash off nice and easy. Chris felt sick when he saw it. Fury, too, directed entirely at the school's quarterback. Jensen looked down at himself, then back up at Chris.

 

"Huh," he said, sounding surprised.

 

"We're goin'," Chris told him, wrapping a hand underneath Jensen's arm and starting to lift.

 

"But we have classes.." 

 

"I don't give a flying fuck. We're goin'. Gimme a hand to get you up here."

 

With a struggle, Jensen managed to get on his feet. He felt better once he was stood up, like the effort had given him a little more energy. He allowed Chris to help him for only a second longer and then his friend stood patiently while Jensen fumbled his buttons closed and knotted his tie up again. Chris then led the way outside, towards the parking lot. There were a few stragglers from lunch. No teachers in sight, but several students who stopped and stared as Jensen went past.

 

He kept his eyes focused on his feet, not wanting to see the pity he could already feel. They were about thirty feet from Chris's truck when they heard Doug laughing.

 

"Hey, fag boy! Someone-" He didn't get to finish whatever he was about to say, because by then Chris was already on him, his fists wrapped around the guy's collar as he got right in his face and dared Doug to say it again. "Calm down, Kane. Plenty of Jenny boy for you too."

 

Jensen turned around in time to see Chris throwing a punch at Doug, catching the underside of his nose. He heard the crack and he backed away from them both as a teacher who had just come outside came running over to them. Chris was pulled off Doug and pushed to one side and he stood there, panting, as Doug clutched his nose and moaned in pain. Mr Helford looked between them, then glanced at Jensen.

 

"Someone want to tell me what's going on here?"

 

Chris pointed at Doug. "That dick assaulted my friend, so I was giving him a taste of his own medicine."

 

"Mr Ackles? Doug? What do you have to say?"

 

Doug glared at Jensen, who just shrugged. "I don't know what happened to him, Sir. I wasn't involved. Kane just went nuts on me."

 

"Did anybody see what happened?" Helford asked, looking around. The few students that had stayed to watch all shook their heads. "Right. Kane, Freeman... Principal's office. Now. Ackles, I suggest you go and see the school nurse."

 

"What?! Are you an idiot? Sir?" Chris waved a hand in Jensen's direction. "It's pretty damn obvious that he's been assaulted and you're sending him to the nurse?"

 

Jensen grabbed Chris's arm, held it until he went quiet. Chris took a step closer to him, his voice quiet enough that only Jensen would hear it. "You say nothing and you're a fucking idiot, Jen. _Please_."

 

But he couldn't say anything.

 

 

 

 

Despite what he had, or rather, _hadn't_ done, Chris still came to find Jensen when he was done with the Principal. He didn't say anything as he led him from the nurse's office and out to his car and he didn't say anything as he drove them over to Jared's place. It wasn't until they pulled up in the driveway and he cut the engine that Jensen finally broke the silence.

 

"What happened?"

 

"I got suspended for the rest of the week."

 

"Doug?"

 

"Two days detention."

 

Jensen looked down at his hands, folded on his lap, and tried to think of something to say to that.

 

"It's okay. I get why you didn't say anything. And you're not an idiot for that. They're the damned idiots for not seeing what's going on."

 

"They shouldn't-"

 

"Yeah, I know," Chris interrupted. "But you're my best friend and I care enough about you that I'd do it over again if I had to. That bastard needs a good beating. He needs showing."

 

"Maybe we're just not the ones to do it to him," Jensen told him.

 

"So get Jared to."

 

Jensen shook his head, firmly. "He'd kill him. I think he would actually kill him. Then we'd all be screwed."

 

Chris sighed. "I guess. So seeing as I'm officially off school until next week, you want to come over tomorrow?"

 

"I'll be at school. I'm not gonna let him drive me away. Not this time." He could feel Chris staring at him and he gazed out of the window, at the closed garage door. He wondered why Jared hadn't come out yet, to see who was home so early. He looked back when Chris touched his arm and nodded at him.

 

"Okay, man. I'll come by tomorrow night if you need me to. Be careful tomorrow."

 

Jensen promised he would, then got out of the truck. At least he could walk, he thought. At least it was only his face that was fucked up. He let himself into the house and soon realized why Jared had not come out straight away. There was classic rock blasting out of the door between the kitchen and the garage, and he could hear Jared singing along. He allowed himself a few minutes to stop and listen, smiling as much as his cracked lip would allow as he held onto the edge of one of the counters. He didn't have time to pull himself together before Jared was suddenly pounding up the steps into the kitchen, humming loudly as he came.

 

Even with the music blaring, the next few seconds seemed to be just about silent to Jensen. He felt like he wanted to throw up, and Jared looked like he wanted to.

 

"What the _fuck_ ," Jared said, though it wasn't a question. He was across the kitchen in a heartbeat, wrapping Jensen up in his arms. A litany of _why, what, how-the-fuck_ spilled from his mouth to Jensen's ear and he forced himself to tell Jared that he was okay. "You don't look okay, Jen. You don't. Jesus fucking Christ, that bastard is going to.. Forget about any promise I made you... Where else did he hit you? What else did he do?"

 

Knowing that Jared would find out anyway, Jensen stepped back and shakily unbuttoned his shirt. When Jared saw it, he reached out a hand like he was going to touch, but he stopped short of doing it. Brought his hand up and raked his fingers through his hair, shaking his head. Jensen could see, just as he had with Chris, that he was burning up in anger. It took a few moments before he could speak again.

 

"You need to just tell me something, Jensen. Just one thing. One word."

 

"What?"

 

"Agree to let me deal with this. _My_ way."

 

Jensen nodded, sadly. "I agree, if you promise you're not going to wind up in trouble."

 

Jared didn't hesitate. "I promise."


	26. Chapter twenty-four

  
Author's notes: Bloody and Evil thank you for reading and all the awesome comments!!   
**Two chapters today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

Though it was filled with students, the school seemed relatively quiet. That is, until the black muscle car roared through the parking lot, tires squealing as it slammed to a stop. The door creaked loudly, swinging open wide. Jeffrey hauled himself out of the driver's seat, jaw clenched as he slammed the door shut again. No one was in the quad area as he headed towards the historic main building. 

 

Jensen was back home with Jared. In a panic, Jared had called Jeffrey's cell phone, and begged him to come home.

 

"Now, Jeff, please?"

 

"What's wrong?" he'd asked, already heading out the door of his office.

 

"He did it again," Jared had told him. "Freeman beat the shit out of him. I need you right now."

 

It was hard for Jared to ask for help, so when he did, Jeffrey listened. He'd come home right away, and looked Jensen over for himself. He was bruised, bloodied, and had even spit a tooth out while Jared had been cleaning him up. "Oh, come _on_ ," he complained, wincing. It looked as though one or two of the kid's ribs might be at least fractured. He had a hard time moving, and the longer he remained still, the more his side hurt him. 

 

"You're going to the hospital now," Jeffrey had demanded.

 

Jensen had shaken his head. "Nothing they can do for broken ribs," he said. "As long as they haven't punctured my lung, I'm fine."

 

"And how do you know it hasn't already punctured your lung?"

 

"Because I can breathe," Jensen had said, trying to smile.

 

Jeffrey had shaken his head, not returning the smile. "They could give you pain killers," he frowned. 

 

They had patched the kid up as best they could, and then Jeffrey pressed a bottle of alcohol into Jared's hand and mumbled into his boy's ear, "Try to get that writing off of him."

 

Jared had nodded, and while he and Jensen went back to the garage, Jeffrey left. He'd told them he was going back to work, and that's where he had honestly planned to go. But then, he thought about what happened and found himself rocketing towards the school, his anger burning hot.

 

Inside, the school was just as proper and quiet as it had been outside. Jeffrey knew he would be the remedy for that, however. He made his way to the main office and bypassed the sign-in clipboard. He didn't write down his name, and he didn't take a visitor's pass. He breezed past the secretary, not even looking in her direction.

 

"Sir?" she called, wheeling her chair away from her computer. "Sir!"

 

He ignored her, heading towards the office with the door plaque that read "Superintendent."

 

"Sir, you can't go in there!" the secretary warned.

 

He didn't care though. He turned the doorknob and burst through the doorway. The door cracked up against the door stopper on the wall behind it, hard enough to split the rubber. 

 

Jeffrey found the Superintendent to be behind his desk, phone in hand. A nameplate declared CHAS. A. CAMERON in neat white letters against a gray marble background. The office was too tidy, only a few things seeming to be out of place. The man looked rather startled as he watched the burly construction worker burst through his door, the office secretary behind him. 

 

Jeffrey walked over to the desk and set both hands upon the wooden top. "Off the phone," he growled at the man. "Now."

 

The Super nodded at him. "Louise?" he said into the phone. "I'll call you right back." With extraordinary calmness, he set the phone back down upon its cradle.

 

"I'm sorry, sir," the secretary spoke, having to peek around Jeffrey's broad back. "He just burst in here."

 

"That's alright, Shelly," he nodded. "You can leave us."

 

She didn't quite look sure, but she backed away when Jeffrey turned to look at her, fire burning in his gaze. When she was out of the room again, Jeffrey glared over at Superintendent Cameron. "You and me got a little talking to do." He straightened and moved over to the door, closing it with a little too much force.

 

"Sir, I'm not sure we've met," Cameron said, standing from his chair and offering his hand. "Are you a parent of one of our newest students?" It was rare to get new students so late in the year, but they did have at least two that had transferred just recently. Somehow, though, the Super had every doubt in the world that this rough-looking man had a student in his school.

 

Jeffrey didn't take the outstretched hand. "No child of mine would attend this stuffy, condescending and ill-mannered excuse of a school," he snapped.

 

Cameron frowned, annoyed, but hiding it. "I have to admit, sir," he told him. "I take personal offense at those comments."

 

"Sue me," Jeffrey returned. "You're lucky I don't haul off and break your damn nose right here."

 

The Superintendent held up his hands. "Mister...I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name?"

 

He hated the feigned friendly manner the man had about him. "Morgan," he said, glaring.

 

"Mister Morgan, why don't we start with what has you so upset?"

 

"Douglas Freeman."

 

Instantly, Cameron's demeanor changed. He became uncomfortable, as if he knew more than he was letting on. As if Douglas Freeman was untouchable. "I'm not at liberty to freely discuss our students with parents or guardians, but I can at least tell you that Mister Freeman is one of our best students here at--"

 

" _Bull_ shit."

 

The profanity seemed to stun the Super. "Excuse me?"

 

"That boy is nothing but a bully, and you know it."

 

"I beg to differ," he argued. "Mister Freeman is an exemplary scholar."

 

"Doug Freeman is an asshole. He has done nothing but pound on Jensen Ackles since day one, and you've never, never tried to stop it," Jeffrey spoke, his voice growing louder and gruffer with each passing moment. "And now, he's broken that boy up something awful."

 

"Mister Ackles?"

 

"Yeah, _Mister Ackles_ ," he said sarcastically. "Don't tell me you don't know about it."

 

"Ah, earlier I dealt with a couple of boys involved in an altercation in the school’s parking lot," he admitted. "Mister Ackles' name was perhaps, well, hinted at, but there was no real mention of him."

 

_He's lying_ , Jeffrey thought. _The rat bastard is lying_. "Altercation?" he repeated. "Is that what you call a kid getting the shit kicked out of him?"

 

The Super almost sighed in annoyance. "Mister Morgan, I'll have to ask you to--"

 

"They held him down, Freeman and a couple of his _minions_ ," Jeffrey told him. "They held him down and beat him until he couldn't even stand. They wrote obscenities on him, they kicked him, they knocked out a couple of his damn _teeth_. Is that what you call an _altercation_ , Mister Cameron?"

 

It was silent for a moment, while the Super moved around to his chair again. He smoothed down his tie as he sat down, maneuvering himself in close to his desk. "Mister Morgan," he began calmly. "Children that don't fit in here... I'm afraid the other students aren't very forgiving."

 

"And why wouldn't Jensen fit in? He's from a rich family like the rest of them. He's had every opportunity that they've had. He excels at his work like they do, he--"

 

"Because, sir," he said, interrupting. "Because of... Because of what he is."

 

Smiling in a challenging way, Jeffrey set his hands upon the desk, leaning his weight on strong arms. "And what is that exactly, Mister Cameron?" Jeffrey had no tolerance for people like the Superintendent. Not since the day Jared had come to him and told him everything about himself. He'd become a defender of that boy, and he would defend Jensen the same way, as long as he had to.

 

The Super sighed, weighing his words for a moment. Maybe he'd seen the challenge in Jeffrey's eyes, and maybe he realized that he didn't stand a chance. Maybe he just couldn’t say the words he wanted to. "Different," he said, eventually.

 

Shaking his head, Jeffrey poked a finger at the desktop. "I expect this Freeman bastard to be dealt with," he snarled. "I want him kicked out of this school."

 

Cameron furrowed his brow in confusion. "Mister Morgan, I'm not exactly sure how you come into play in all of this," he said. "Are you Mister Ackles' legal guardian?"

 

"No, I am _not_ his legal damn guardian," he returned, narrowing his eyes at the man.

 

The Super shrugged, opening his hands in a gesture that said, _Oh well, sucks to be you then, doesn't it?_ He finally had the upper hand, and he liked it. "If you're not a parent or guardian, I'm afraid I'll have to ask you to leave."

 

Jeffrey saw the smug smile and had to hold himself back from slapping it right off of Cameron's face. "You can go right to hell."

 

"If Mister Ackles is not living at home, I will be forced to Hotline this."

 

"Don't you fucking threaten me with Social Services," Jeffrey snapped. "That boy was kicked out of his own home because he was so _different_. You and your kind are so intolerant, that you disown each other at the drop of a goddamn hat. Jensen lives with _me_ now. And I will _fight_ for that boy, just like I would my own son. I will make such a ruckus that you'll bleed from the ears, son."

 

"Is that a threat, Mister Morgan?"

 

Jeffrey smiled and leaned in closer. "You bet your ass it is," he nodded. "I know the reprimands they got. I know how Chris Kane got suspended, and I know how your little pet Freeman got two days detention. I can clearly see where your loyalties lie, Mister Cameron. Keep Dougie Freeman out of trouble and Daddy will fund this school for the rest of his days, won't he?"

 

"Mister Morgan, that is enough."

 

Furious, Jeffrey slammed his fist upon the desktop. The pencils and pens rattled in their holder, the heavy pottery container jumping at least an inch off the desk from the shockwave. Mister Cameron jumped as well, eyes wide with fear as he stared up at Jeffrey. After a moment of silence, Jeffrey doing his best to keep his volatile temper under control, he finally spoke. "Do you know why I'm here, Cameron?" he asked. "Because Jensen was too afraid to make noise. You have your kids in here so... Bought, that they're afraid of everything. I'd wager Freeman is terrified all the time, and this is how he copes."

 

Cameron stared at him, not saying a word.

 

Jeffrey shook his head. "This whole place is a joke," he said. He shoved away from the desk and headed towards the door. Pulling it open, he saw two uniformed police officers standing in the lobby, heading towards him. He raised a hand to them, recognizing their faces.

 

"Yeah, yeah," he snapped before they could even speak. "I'm already on my way out."

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen wondered why he even bothered returning to school. He was slow, moving painfully, and he looked like hell. But for some reason, that didn't stop him from walking through the halls, his head held higher than it used to be. Maybe he wanted people to see what Doug had done, to show them that Doug was a jerk, and to show them that he wasn't as weak as he used to be.

 

But people mostly avoided Jensen's eyes. He knew, then, that word had gotten around about what had been written on him, and most of their suspicions about him were pretty much confirmed.

 

At his locker, Jensen opened the metal door and rested his forehead on the edge of the top shelf. He sighed and wished that it was May, graduation for him. He closed his eyes to will away the headache that he'd had since the previous day. He stayed there for awhile, not worried that the kids were clearing out around him, heading off to their classes. He would be late again, but he didn't care. Not anymore.

 

A hand pressed against the closed locker beside his, on either side of him. He felt the warmth of a body nearing his, leaning in to speak into his ear.

 

"How you feeling, princess?"

 

Jensen sighed again. "Doug," he breathed. "Please go away."

 

"Mm, gettin' pretty mouthy again, don't you think?" he returned. "Might have to do something about that, Jenny."

 

He wasn't afraid. That surprised him in a way. But Doug's words were making him angry, that's all. He turned around in the small space provided by Doug's arms and glared over at him. "You know what?" he began. "Maybe you are jealous." He thought he'd hit the nail on the head when he saw Doug's smile fade, his eyes glance down Jensen's chest, then back up again. He was backing off. Either that, or he was sizing him up again for another pounding. Whatever the reason, Jensen had started and couldn't stop. "Maybe you are so goddamn curious that it scares the shit out of you." He leaned in a little closer to speak quieter. "Maybe _you_ wonder what it's like to fuck a guy. To get blown by one. Maybe you've got a hard-on right now, just thinking about it."

 

Enraged, Doug landed another punch to Jensen's stomach, just like he had the day before. The wind was forced out of Jensen's lungs, and he doubled over in pain. He slid down to the floor, holding his stomach and wounded ribcage, trying to catch his breath. Doug knelt down in front of him. "I got two fucking nights of detention because of you and your mouth," he snarled. "Don't think that ain't gonna cost you, fagface."

 

Temples throbbing, gut screaming, Jensen looked up at him. 

 

"Douglas."

 

Doug's head snapped up and he smiled as he saw a teacher standing in the hallway. "Just checking up on him, sir," he lied. He stood and was off to his own class, without books of any kind, leaving Jensen curled up on the corridor floor.

 

"Jensen, are you alright?"

 

He coughed and groaned at the sharp pain in his chest. "Fan-fucking-tastic," he finally said.

 

 

 

 

Doug didn't get home until five-thirty in the afternoon on the two days following his punishment. Because he'd had two nights of detention, he’d missed any football practices that had been scheduled. He knew coach would let him in if he showed up, but he took the two evenings off and gave himself some time to slack off.

 

His Mom didn't usually get home until six, and his father -- if he even came home -- would arrive some time during the night. No telling if the man was even in the country, to be honest. Doug preferred it if his father was as far away from him as possible. Malcolm Freeman always gave his son the best, gave him anything he wanted, but he always expected repayment. He was a force to be reckoned with. No one on the outside of the family would believe that, however. Malcolm Freeman was a street angel, and a house devil.

 

From an early age, Doug had learned to do what Daddy wanted. If not, he was put in his place with a rough hand and a sharp tongue. He still had a scar on his lower back from golf lessons. Malcolm had been teaching Doug the perfect form, and when it all turned out less-than-perfect, seven year old Doug got a putter to the back. He'd had eleven stitches and had been black and blue for a week.

 

The knock at the door wasn't wholly unexpected. The Freeman household was always busy. The visitor standing on the stoop, however, was highly unexpected. The man was huge, probably around six-foot-five, three hundred pounds. And Doug was pretty sure most of that weight was muscle underneath a good layer of fat. He wore the attire of a biker, his face was unshaven, and a bandana was tied around the top of his head. His worn jean jacket was branded with the name "NECRO," and Doug had a sudden fear of why the man had gotten such a nickname.

 

"What?" he asked.

 

Necro looked at him through dark sunglasses. "You Doug Freeman?"

 

"Who's asking?"

 

Necro leaned in closer, pressing a finger to his own broad chest. " _I am_ , skid-mark."

 

Pursing his lips, Doug nodded. "Yeah, I'm Doug Freeman."

 

Necro pulled something out of his back jean pocket and shoved it at the young man.

 

His brow knit together with worry and curiosity. "What's this?" he asked, looking down at the manila envelope.

 

"You've been served."

 

"What?!"

 

"Open it," Necro told him. "I want to make sure everything's nice and clear."

 

He practically tore into the envelope. He pulled out the contents, finding -- not legal documents, but instead a typed letter and a set of color copies. He read the letter silently, almost dumbstruck.

 

 

_FREEMAN,_

_YOU AND YOUR GIRLFRIEND WERE A HIT. TAKE A LOOK AT THE PHOTOS._

 

 

Doug did as the letter suggested and flipped back to the color copied Polaroids, all placed onto one sheet of bright white paper. He saw himself in the shots, a red, sequined dress draped across the bed, and the body of another man near his. His heart flipped and his stomach knotted. 

 

 

_TAKE THE HINT. TOUCH ACKLES AGAIN, AND ONE COPY OF THESE WILL BE SENT TO MALCOLM FREEMAN, AND ANOTHER COPY WILL BE POSTED ON THE SCHOOL MESSAGE BOARDS._

_ONLY ONE PERSON KNOWS WHERE THE PICTURES ARE. AND IT'S NOT ACKLES._

_HAVE A SUPER DAY._

 

 

"Have a super day?!" he read aloud. He remembered the night at the bar, remembered the gorgeous woman in the red dress. He could vaguely recall walking her out to his car, and then things sort of went black. He certainly didn't remember doing what the pictures suggested he did. For some reason, he reached around and set a hand to his backside, as if that would tell him everything that had happened. Grasping the papers again in a fisted hand, Doug looked at Necro. "This was goddamn Jared what-the-fuck-ever, wasn't it?"

 

Necro just looked at him.

 

"He can't _do_ this," he continued. "He can't do this, this is _blackmail_."

 

Necro only listened, a bored look upon his face.

 

"He can't get into the school message board and post these," Doug kept on. He wavered for a moment, gazing at Necro. "Can he?"

 

"How much do you want to find out?"

 

The question was simple, but it infuriated Doug even more. "You get off my father's property before I have you arrested for the forty-fucking-billionth time, Necro!"

 

Not at all frightened, Necro leaned in a little closer. "That's right, Dougie," he nodded. "I've been to prison more times than your Daddy's gotten off in your Momma's pussy. And I ain't got no problem with going back. Especially knowing that a pretty little thing like you will be coming through the system one day."

 

Horrified, Doug shoved Necro back and slammed the door in the man's face. He pressed his back to the old mahogany and tried to calm his trembling limbs, his frantically beating heart. When he couldn't, he sank down to the floor, Necro's laughter filtering through the thick wooden front door. He jumped when he heard Necro's fist connect with the mahogany door before he turned to leave. Doug looked down at the papers and manila envelope again. He put his head in his hands and pulled at his hair. He couldn't go to his father, couldn't go to the family lawyer. What was he going to do?

 

 

 

 

"What are you doing?"

 

Jared set down the Polaroid camera and reached out to Jensen, curling his fingers around the hem of the young man's shirt. Jensen had only just recently gotten dressed into his after-school clothes, and Jared was now relieving him of some of them. 

 

"What?" Jensen asked again, a little perturbed.

 

"Picture," Jared said simply.

 

Jensen pushed Jared's hands away and shook his head. "No, Jay," he refused. "Let it go."

 

Jared's calm demeanor was suddenly gone. He wasn't furious, but he was far more annoyed than he had been before. "I'm not fucking letting it go, Jensen," he snapped. "You said you'd let me do this."

 

"Why?"

 

For a split second, Jared regretted making Jensen more confident. He sighed and stared into Jensen's eyes. "Because I want proof that he's done this to you," he said patiently. 

 

"In case he kills me?"

 

Jared stared at him for a second more. "That's not funny."

 

"I didn't say it was."

 

"Please, Jen," he said, his greenish eyes much softer than before. "I want a picture. I want people to see what he's done to you for all these years."

 

Jensen tried to snicker at him. "Who you going to show it to?"

 

"Whoever I have to."

 

Jensen didn't think that Jared really would show anyone. He just wanted it to file away for now. It would make him feel better. Sighing, Jensen nodded his head and asked for help with his shirt. Jared assisted him, carefully pulling Jensen's arms out, and then tugging it over his head. He pushed Jensen back against the only relatively empty garage wall, where the afternoon sunlight was pouring through the garage door panes.

 

Jensen ended up looking away when the shot was taken. Jared had directed him to pull his jeans down enough to show the bruise where he'd been kicked. Jensen did, but he couldn't look at the camera. Jared didn't force him to. The bruises on his face were obvious enough. The Sharpie marker hadn't readily come off, regardless of the alcohol, which made Jared think it was some other kind of marker or paint pen used. He told Jensen they would try gasoline next. But they would get that brand off of him, Jared promised. 

 

 

 

 

The alarm went off, waking Jensen up to the tune of "Drops of Jupiter" by Train. He gingerly reached over and turned off the radio. He'd had to sleep on his back, to avoid a pain in his side. He never slept as well on his back as he did on his side or stomach, but he doubted a lack of sleep was going to make him look any worse.

 

Carefully, Jensen got up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. He sat there for a moment, waking himself up completely and taking a rest before he hauled himself down the ladder and into the shower. He felt a hand on his back and turned. "Sorry," he apologized. "Didn't mean to wake you up."

 

Jared yawned, turning on his side to face Jensen. "You sure you have to go in today?"

 

Jensen nodded. "Last day before the weekend," he said, not really answering the question.

 

"Stay home."

 

"I can't, Jay."

 

"Yes, you can, it's one day."

 

"It's a day where he'll think he got the better of me," he said. "I hate that he has so many times already. I'm not backing down this time."

 

Jared took a deep breath, slowly exhaling and nodding his head. "Okay," he agreed. "I'll bring you."

 

"I don't want to go on the bike," Jensen refused. "I'll take the bus."

 

"I'll take you," Jared said again, sterner this time. "I'll take the car and Jeff can take the bike. I'll switch with him later, he won't care."

 

Jensen didn't want Jared anywhere near the school, but the man wasn't going to take no for an answer. "Fine," he grumbled.

 

 

 

 

The school grounds were crawling with students by the time the car rumbled up to the curb. Jared turned off the engine and looked over at Jensen. "Want me to pick you up?"

 

Jensen shook his head. "No," he refused. "I'll catch a ride with Chris."

 

"I'm not going to hurt him, Jensen."

 

Jensen looked over at him, knowing very well who Jared was talking about. He frowned but said nothing.

 

"I promised you I wouldn't do that."

 

Jensen nodded. "I know." He turned his head, looking over at the school building. "I gotta go." He pushed the door open and got out, hearing Jared do the same. Some of the students were looking back at them. Part of Jensen wanted to cringe and hide, while another part of him wanted to stand tall. As he shouldered his knapsack, Jared moved to sit against the passenger side fender of the car, arms crossed over his chest. He planned on watching Jensen until he got into the building, somehow feeling he was safer that way.

 

 

"Ackles!"

 

Jensen sighed and closed his eyes. Doug. He looked over to where he heard his name being called and, sure enough, Freeman was stomping towards him. 

 

"Where's your fucking _boy_ friend?"

 

Jensen didn't say anything, just staring at the bully. He felt an arm loop around his shoulders and, though he dreaded the confrontation, he felt stronger with Jared's arm around him. 

 

"Hi, Dougie," Jared smiled.

 

"You listen to me, fuckface," Doug began, pointing a finger at Jared.

 

"Aw, Jen," Jared grinned, speaking before the instigator could go on. "Doesn't Doug look great this morning?"

 

There was a beat of silence, as Doug tried to figure out if he'd secretly been insulted. Some sort of inside joke? He didn't think so. "What?" he asked.

 

"What?" Jensen echoed.

 

"Yeah," Jared nodded. "You look fucking photogenic as hell today, man." He reached out and patted Doug's shoulder in an overly-friendly gesture. 

 

Confused, Jensen looked over at Doug, noticed that Doug's eye was twitching. Jaw sealed shut, he glanced from Jared to Jensen and then back again. Without another word, he merely nodded his head and backed away from them. One of his lackeys rushed to catch up with him, but Doug shoved the young man away, knocking him to the ground.

 

Jensen wasn't sure what to think. Still more than just a little confused, Jensen looked up at Jared, who was smiling just slightly. He met Jensen's eyes and chuckled softly. Then, he turned on his heel and headed back towards the car.

 

"Jay?"

 

Jared paused as he started to open the car door. "Yeah?”

 

"Pick me up later?"

 

Jared smiled at him again and nodded his head. "Be here with bells on," he told him. 

 

 

 

 

 

"What did you do?"

 

Pulling off his gloves, Jared began to unbuckle his bike helmet. "What?"

 

"What did you do?" Jensen repeated. He put his own helmet away and wriggled out from underneath the strap of his knapsack. 

 

"What are you talking about?" Jared asked. He pulled off the helmet and raked his fingers through his tousled hair.

 

"What did you do to Doug?"

 

"Oh, to Doug," he smiled. "I just helped him set his priorities, that's all."

 

"Oh yeah, right," Jensen smirked. "The guy didn't come near me all day. And when he did, he called me 'Jensen.'"

 

"Oh, the horror!"

 

"Jared, I don't remember the last time he called me that," he said. "I usually get 'Jenny,' or 'princess' or some other dumb name." He set his bag down at his makeshift work desk and looked at Jared. "So what did you do to him?"

 

Jared chuckled and shook his head. "You're not part of it, Jen," he said.

 

"The hell I'm not."

 

"You know what I mean," he said.

 

Jensen stared at him for a moment, refusing to budge. "I want to know."

 

Taking a deep breath, Jared sighed. He nodded his head and raised his hand in the air, finger extended. He twirled it at Jensen and said, "Turn around. I'm supposed to be the only one who knows where the shit is."

 

He almost rolled his eyes at the boy-club secrecy, and then did as he was told. He heard a number of drawers being opened and knew that Jared was opening so many only to keep him off the trail. Some rustling around on the work benches, tools clinking together, old coffee cans of nuts and bolts rattling as Jared moved things about. 

 

"Alright."

 

Turning, Jensen found Jared in the same place as before, but this time with something in his hands. He turned them over to Jensen and waited. 

 

Wide-eyed, Jensen flipped through the pictures. Some of them were frighteningly close-up and some were shot from a wide enough angle to get everything but the mystery-man's face in. 

 

"Trevor helped," Jared said. 

 

After a few more rounds through the pictures, Jensen looked over at him. "This is why he was almost civil to me today?"

 

Jared flexed his chin, the corners of his mouth pointing down for a split second, and nodded his head. 

 

Jensen flipped through a couple more of the Polaroids. "I should be mad at you."

 

"Why?"

 

"This is blackmail."

 

"And?"

 

"And, it's incredibly stupid. And probably illegal."

 

Jared smiled. "It worked, didn't it?"

 

He didn't return the grin. Instead, Jensen nodded, taking a deep breath and sighing. "For now," he agreed.

 

"It'll work," Jared assured him. "I threatened to send a copy to his father, and post a copy onto the school message forum."

 

"Jared."

 

He shrugged. "What?" He saw the reprimanding look in Jensen's eye and slumped closer to him. He took the pictures and pocketed them, then hooked his fingers into the pockets of Jensen's uniform pants. "Okay, so it was wrong," he agreed. "I probably shouldn't have done all of that, but I did."

 

"Why?” He knew why. He just wanted to hear it. 

 

"For you, doofus," Jared grinned. He carefully set a hand to Jensen's face and then pressed an equally gentle kiss to the young man's bruised forehead. "Because I care about you, and I don't want to see you hurt anymore."

 

Jensen thought for a moment, taking another deep breath. His eyes seemed heavy, now that Jared's body heat was combining with his own. He sighed and nodded his head. "Okay," he agreed. 

 

He could deal with that.


	27. Chapter twenty-five

Jensen's mom came around to the house on Friday evening, not long after he'd returned from school. She'd wanted to come as soon as Jeffrey had called and told her what had happened to her boy, but Alan had been working at home that night and she hadn't had a moment without him until Friday. The school had called, although they hadn't gone into great detail, and when she asked Jeffrey why he told her that she should look into just what their money was funding. Oh, he knew that the majority of the staff would have done something about it if they could, but the ones with any power to wield were the ones who chose not to.

 

She spent an hour just sat with Jensen in the kitchen, watching him do his homework. Asked again and again if he was all right, why he hadn't told her before, while Jared stood by and worried. He knew Jensen wasn't going anywhere. He'd told him so. But he couldn't help himself. Jensen listened to her, and nodded in the right places, but mostly he concentrated on his books. He ignored a lot of her questions. It was a mark of how he'd been affected that he was beginning to draw into himself again. Jared hoped that it was simply because this was his mom and he didn't want to scare her.

 

She touched his arm, squeezing it through his thick sweater, and he finally looked directly at her. "I'll be okay," he said, closing his eyes when she stood up slightly and leaned across to kiss his temple.

 

"I know you will, sweetie. Seems like Jared and Jeffrey here can protect you far better than we ever could."

 

That provoked a reaction. Jensen scraped his chair back and stood, hugging his mother tight. "That's not... That's not the point, mom."

 

"It's all right. Just promise me you'll be careful."

 

He promised with a whisper, and then let her go. Jared told her goodbye and saw her out, then returned to find Jensen tugging off the sweater he'd pulled over his school shirt - only so his mom wouldn't see the tattoos just yet - and then once more bending over his books.

 

"You gotta do all that tonight?"

 

Jensen didn't look up. "I want to. Gives me the whole weekend free if I do."

 

Jared shrugged. "I guess. But it's Friday night, Jen. Don't you want to do movies and takeout?"

 

"No, I want to do my homework. Besides, Jeff's not home. Is he out with Stevie tonight?"

 

Sitting down at the opposite side of the table to Jensen, Jared shook his head. "He's just working late. He said he'd be home by ten. The overtime's good right now, since everybody wants it done by Christmas."

 

"I guess." Jensen said nothing more, going back to his books. Jared watched him, wondering how mad he'd get if he got... Distracted. He scratched at the side of his neck, dragging his nails down towards his throat. As he did, Jensen looked up at him with a soft smile. "Don't even think about it. Jared, I swear this will take me another two hours. I'll finish up on Sunday morning while you're still asleep. But give me two hours on this and then we can have the rest of the night."

 

"I love when you get bossy," Jared told him. He got up and left Jensen alone in the kitchen, although not before sharing a quiet kiss as a promise for later. 

 

 

 

 

When Jensen was done, he went and found Jared on the couch and slid down beside him. He was watching the end of one of the Die Hard movies - Jensen didn't really notice which one - and moved to put one arm over Jensen's shoulders and pull him closer. He felt Jared's mouth press to the side of his head and closed his eyes, feeling tired. He half-listened to the movie as it drew to a close, but must have drifted off because he startled awake when Jared ran a hand through his hair.

 

"Fallin' asleep on me?" The quiet murmur against his ear tickled, and he squirmed away slightly. "Still early, Jen. Don't you want..." He trailed off, turning and pushing Jensen back down, his face hovering inches away. One hand smoothed Jensen's shirt over his stomach, then slipped between the bottom buttons. Jared's fingers were warm on his skin, and Jensen fought the urge to yawn at him. Instead he let go a quiet moan, unconsciously lifting his hips towards the touch. Jared undid a couple of buttons and worked his whole hand inside Jensen's shirt, lightly stroking over his stomach.

 

It felt way too good. Especially when Jared began planting soft little kisses along his jawline and down across his throat. Jensen ran his hand up and down Jared's arm as he held himself in position, still touching and kissing.

 

The hand in his shirt was pulled free and Jared moved it up over the thick cotton, pausing to squeeze the skin around Jensen's nipples. He stroked under his collar, then back down to his chest, and he continued the action for a few long minutes, never ceasing in his kisses. Jensen stood for it only so long before he moaned at Jared to get on with it, needing him to. His shirt was completely unbuttoned after that, and Jared pushed it over his shoulders and down, bit gently at his neck as he undressed him.

 

His pants were next; the belt unbuckled and the fly unzipped. Everything was slow and muted, like the drag of Jared's fingers over the ridge of Jensen's erection, straining against the cotton of his briefs. He held it in a loose grip, skimming up and down, and rubbed the material over the head of Jensen's cock until it was damp and dark. By this point the other man was pushing back against the couch with his head, hips rising up to try and force Jared to more action. But he was far too busy teasing to pay attention. 

 

When his underwear was finally dragged down, it was almost painful. 

 

"Jay.. Fuck, come on.. _Please_.." It was a fact that nobody could make Jensen need as much as Jared. Nobody could make him lose it quite so quickly. It was also a fact that Jared couldn't help but oblige. At least when it came to getting Jensen off. Jared fisted his cock more tightly, thumbing precome down the sides. He sat up enough to watch his hand work Jensen over, lips curving into a smile at the sight. 

 

"So fucking pretty, Jen," he muttered, squeezing just so, the way he knew would make Jensen lose it in no time. There was a mumble of dissent in reply, but Jared ignored it. Jensen would always be beautiful to him. His stomach was clean, shining with a thin layer of sweat. The bruise on his hip was still a dark pink, and Jared knew it still pained him, but the other marks were already less obvious. And so what if there were dark rings under both his eyes? So what if there was a small scab at the corner of his mouth? Jared didn't care. He loved everything about the man beneath him who was currently losing all control.

 

Jensen's cock pulsed in his hand and Jared watched him come, watched it spatter his chest. He reached down with his free hand and painted it between Jensen's muscles, dragging his fingers through sweat and come and then licking them clean when he was done. With the taste of it on his tongue he leaned down, covering Jensen's body with his, and opened his boyfriend's mouth up into a kiss. A moan was caught between them, swallowed, and Jensen's hands curled tightly around the back pockets of Jared's jeans.

 

Which was about the moment they both heard Jeffrey's key in the front door. Jensen said, Fuck, and reached between them to pull his pants up and fasten them as much as he could, while Jared helped by not resting his weight on him for a moment. Jensen pushed at him as Jeff walked in, but he wouldn't budge. Instead he just looked around and grinned, wide and bright. Jeff looked over at the pair of them and shook his head, turning to hang his jacket.

 

"You boys want to move that into the garage? I was kind of hoping to kick back with a beer and some TV. And if you've made a mess I'll-"

 

"Relax, Jeff. I cleaned up." Jared finally moved to let Jensen sit up and he quickly pulled his shirt back up over his shoulders. "How was work?"

 

"Long. I gotta head back there first thing tomorrow, but I'll be home by midday. And Stevie'll be here not long after that. So if you guys could make sure you don't get this place into too much of a state, I'd appreciate it."

 

"We can go out," Jared told him, watching Jeff take a seat in the armchair opposite them.

 

"Yeah, sure you can. But I want you here in the afternoon. I want us to sit together and have a meal and maybe have it go a little better than last time." He looked directly at Jared as he said that, and his boy just nodded in return, silent. "Good. Cause if it doesn't, you really are going to be in proper serious shit. Now, you can stay in here and watch TV with me, as long as one of you gets the beers and there's no..." He waved a hand. "Funny stuff." He toed off his boots then and put his feet up on the table, crossing his ankles. Watched them expectantly. 

 

It was Jared who got up to grab some beers from the refrigerator. He came back with a six-pack in one hand, and two bags of pretzels in the other. Jensen shifted over when he sat back down, but Jared pulled him up against his side and held onto him for the rest of the night.

 

 

 

 

When they ambled into the house on Saturday morning, sleepy and itchy with residual warmth, Jeffrey was already gone. Jared sat at the table, yawning and scratching underneath the elastic of his shorts, and watched Jensen make up a pot of coffee.

 

"You want something to eat?"

 

"Nah. I'm gonna take you out for breakfast and a movie. Just gimme coffee."

 

Jensen turned to face him, holding on to the edge of the counter, and tilted his head. "You're taking me out?"

 

"S'what I said, right?"

 

"Uh."

 

"I sold a couple of spare bike bits. So I'm not gonna ask you to pay for anything."

 

"I didn't mean.." Jensen sighed. "I just don't know about going out. I was hoping to just-"

 

"You're not hiding out here until Monday morning, Jen. You don't need to hide away." Jared got up and moved over to where Jensen stood, putting one hand beside his on the counter and trailing the other down his chest. "You're too sexy to hide away. And we never did see that movie, either." He tucked his fingers underneath Jensen's chin and lifted his head. "You still don't believe me, huh? Guess I'll have to keep saying it until you do."

 

"You're not gonna kiss me now, are you?"

 

Jared dodged back, raising his eyebrows. 

 

"You just need to brush your teeth first, is all."

 

Shaking his head, Jared chuckled, and Jensen curled a hand round the back of his head and pulled him in for a kiss anyway. "Funny," Jared managed, just before their mouths crashed together. 

 

They shared a shower and both dressed in weekend gear - jeans and dark teeshirts, biker boots and leather jackets. Clothes that seemed to give Jensen more confidence as he donned them. He loved the way Jared looked in them, too. The more he wore, the more Jensen wanted to undress him. He stopped himself from suggesting they stay in and go back to bed, because Jared was right. He needed to get out. And if he said they should go back to bed, then Jared would more than likely be talked round.

 

At breakfast, Jared was evil. That was the only word for it, as far as Jensen was concerned. He smothered his pancakes in syrup and made a show of eating them, of licking the fork clean. He grinned stickily at Jensen, ran his tongue over his lips. Swallowed loudly.

 

"Stop that."

 

Jared just smiled in answer and speared the last piece of pancake with his fork, bringing it to his mouth. He chewed slowly, savoring it.

 

"I'm serious," Jensen said, watching his throat work as he swallowed again. "You want me to have to stay here all day? Because if you keep doing that I might not be able to stand."

 

"Hold that thought," Jared told him. "We should get going if we're going to catch that first show."

 

"I hate you."

 

Jared laughed and stood, tossing some money onto the counter for their food. 

 

 

 

 

It was on purpose. Jensen knew that as soon as Jared dragged him between the two back rows and pushed him down into one of the two middle seats. Another two dozen people were either already there or filtered in after them, but they were sat furthest back by four rows. He knew it was on purpose as soon as the lights went down and Jared's hand slid across his thigh. The theater was dark enough and the movie was loud enough - another deliberate choice, Jensen knew - that when Jensen turned and asked what the fuck he thought he was doing, nobody heard him. Nobody except Jared.

 

"What d'you think?" He said, leaning across to speak right in Jensen's ear.

 

"I think you're crazy," Jensen answered, lifting Jared's hand and dropping it onto the arm of his seat.

 

"I think I'm trying to prove to you how much you drive me crazy. You keep saying you don't believe me."

 

"If I say I believe you, will you stop and let me watch the movie?"

 

The response was silence and then a soft sound as Jared shuffled forward in his seat. A dull thud as his knees hit the floor. Jensen scrambled back in his seat, pressing himself hard against the back of it and staring down at Jared. "Are you out of your fucking mind?" He hissed, as his legs were pushed apart and Jared managed to get between them in the narrow space.

 

Jared grinned up at him, touching a finger to his lips to tell Jensen to be quiet, as he reached up and unfastened the belt on his jeans. Jensen couldn't escape as Jared popped open the buttons of his fly and palmed his cock free. He looked around desperately, but saw nobody watching them. All far too busy concentrating on the movie. There was no time wasted and he had to bring his arm up to his mouth, biting down on the thick leather of his jacket sleeve to stop himself from crying out when Jared's warm mouth wrapped around his dick. His eyes stung from it, from the effort of holding back the noise he wanted to make. From the knowledge that if somebody just happened to turn around during a quiet moment in the movie then they would hear him struggling to breathe through his nose.

 

Jared knew how to make short work of it. How to make Jensen come in mere minutes. Whatever tactics he used to do that, however, he wasn't employing at that particular moment. His head bobbed in Jensen's lap, his hands holding firmly onto the younger man's thighs. His mouth never came off Jensen's dick, instead pulling and sucking and licking as quietly as he could manage. He pushed his tongue over the head, jabbing flicks that made Jensen's hips stutter and rise. It was torture and bliss, and his teeth clamped hard around leather as he pushed his feet against the soles of his boots. 

 

On the screen the movie was still in the explosive opening scene, guns blazing and fireballs shooting across the picture. Jensen didn't see any of it. His eyes were closed, now, and his face was hot, his neck damp from sweaty curls of hair. One of Jared's hands moved from his thigh, pushing his teeshirt up around his belly. It did nothing more than brush against his skin, but that seemed to be enough to pull his orgasm from him. Jared swallowed, the feel of his throat working around Jensen's dick almost more than he could bear. He ducked forward in his seat quickly, his head banging against the one in front of him. He was panting, blowing gusts of hot air into Jared's hair.

 

Jared let him free only when he had calmed down and his cock had started to soften again. He redressed him, straightening his teeshirt back out, and then pushed Jensen back into his seat. He waited until another noisy moment in the movie before he manouevered himself out of the tight spot and back into his seat beside Jensen.

 

"I should make you leave right now," Jensen told him. "Crazy fuckin-"

 

"Unbunch your panties, Jen. Nobody saw, you fucking loved it, and it was really hot for me, too."

 

"You-"

 

"Like I told you, you make me crazy. You're too good for me. So damned hot that it doesn't matter where we are, I just want you. Need you losing control to me. You know what? I think we should go to the library and fuck when the movie's done with."

 

"No!"

 

At that outburst, Jared shushed him, and he saw someone a few rows in front turn and glance at him. He bit his lip, trying not to get annoyed. This was the kind of thing Jared did. He knew that. He just hadn't really expected it this morning. His dick was still aching and he looked across at Jared to find him acting engrossed in the movie, like he really cared what was going on. 

 

And, for a while, Jensen pretended to care what was going on too.

 

For a while.


	28. Chapter twenty-six

  
Author's notes: **Two chapters today!!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

In retrospect, Jensen's timing was damned near perfect for maximum revenge potential. He waited out most of the movie, despite Jared shifting restlessly beside him, thumbing his lips with a soft moan every now and again. Jared kept looking over at him, leaning over to breathe against his ear and kiss the side of his neck. Jensen let him, but didn't reciprocate at first. The movie was nearly done with by the time he made a move. Jared had just about given up.

 

He reached over as the bad guy was just about to be maimed and grabbed between Jared's legs. Hard. He heard the sharp intake of breath and felt bits of popcorn hit his legs on the way to the floor when Jared's arm jerked sideways in surprise. But he didn't let it stop him, squeezing through denim and finding the shape of Jared's hard cock with his fingers. Jared didn't react as Jensen had. He didn't try and stop him. Instead he relaxed back in his seat and let his legs fall open a little wider, his head tipping back as he licked his lips.

 

Jensen took that as an invitation. He moved his hand up and then forced it underneath the waist of Jared's jeans, smiling at the little start when his hand came into contact with bare flesh. When he looked up, he found Jared looking directly at him.

 

"Movie's about to end," he said, giving one long stroke and then easing his hand free. Jared caught his wrist and held it.

 

"Ain't finished yet..."

 

"Neither are you. We'll carry on at home."

 

About to argue, Jared just swore at him because the credits had started rolling and the lights were beginning to come up.

 

 

 

 

They'd driven to the theater in Jeff's car, having gotten up to find he'd taken his bike to work. Jensen guessed he intended to take Stevie out on it that afternoon, before bringing her home, and he wondered if she'd enjoy her first bike experience as much as he had. As long as she didn't get into a fight. But, he guessed, that was probably something that only happened if you went with Jared. Jeffrey seemed more the type to stop fights than start them.

 

The Harley wasn't in the drive when they returned, so Jeffrey was still out. Just as well, thought Jensen, given the state Jared was in and what he wanted to do to him. He'd teased him throughout the drive home, and Jared had almost said 'screw it' and pulled over at one point, but Jensen insisted he kept driving. Jared might be fine with blowing him in public, but Jensen was pretty sure that if he tried it they'd be discovered and then there would be some serious explaining to do. 

 

Jared parked up and as soon as he'd cut the engine, he dragged Jensen across the front seat to him and attacked his mouth vigorously. His teeth scraped, his tongue jabbed against the sides of Jensen's mouth, and his breath fanned hot between them. When he let Jensen go, his eyes were dark with need.

 

"Ready to go inside?" Jensen asked, smirking as he licked his lips. 

 

"I'm ready, you fucking dick. I've been ready for the last half hour and-"

 

Jensen shut him up with another kiss, more gentle than before. "Come on then."

 

He'd intended to get him up to bed, wanting to return the favor lavished on him in the movie theater, but Jared clearly didn't want to waste any time. As soon as they were in the garage he started unbuckling his belt and sighed in relief as he pushed his jeans down and grabbed at his cock. Jensen placed two hands against Jared's chest and pushed him back against the ladder, making him let go before he dropped to his knees. Jared's mouth fell open in a rush of air and he gripped at the rungs behind him, staring down at Jensen. Jensen who was just now gripping the base of his cock to hold it steady, before sliding his mouth down over what he could manage.

 

"Fuck.." Eloquent, as always, Jared cursed down at him, until he couldn't think clearly enough to speak and he tipped his head back, shutting his eyes. For a second attempt, this was a definite improvement. Jensen let go of him once he had him steady in his mouth, instead using his hands to frame Jared's erection. His fingertips dug into soft, sensitive skin. Tickled into dark, curly hair. One hand slid smoothly down to cup around his balls and Jensen squeezed, accompanying it with an upward stroke of the tongue. 

 

Jared managed to pry his eyes open and look back down at Jensen, surprised to see how unsure he still looked. He was concentrating hard, maybe on not fucking this up, and he was watching Jared's face as if the reaction would tell him he was doing it wrong. To reassure him, Jared loosened one hand's grip on the ladder behind him and planted it firmly in Jensen's hair, keeping him where he was. Truth be told, he just wanted to fuck Jensen's mouth until he came down his throat, but he held back the urge because he felt like he should ask if that was okay before he did it, and right now he didn't have the vocal capacity for anything other than incoherent moans.

 

Jensen's hands moved again, around Jared's hips, before curving firmly around his ass. Jared felt like his knees were buckling and he held onto the ladder and to Jensen much more tightly as Jensen's fingernails pressed in. He didn't take his mouth off Jared's cock once, and after several more minutes of torturous bliss, Jared was tugging on his hair to warn him how close he was. He should have known though. Should have known that Jensen wouldn't take the hint, or wouldn't understand it, or-

 

Jensen pulled his mouth back until all he had in it was the head and Jared was coming, pulsing into his mouth. Jensen didn't refrain from swallowing this time, although not all of it. He let half fall down his throat, breathing through his nose hard as he swallowed. What he couldn't manage dribbled from the sides of his mouth, rolling down his chin. He didn't have time to think about the taste or how he wanted to wipe his face off before Jared was forcing him to his feet, turning him around so his back was against the ladder, and kissing him hard. 

 

Jared's tongue swiped over Jensen's chin, cleaning him off, and then pushed into his mouth. His cock was still twitching, still half-hard, and Jensen wrapped one hand around it and held it as they kissed.

 

 

 

They were laid out on Jared's sofa together, the heater he had set up aimed right at them, both in jeans and both in post-orgasmic bliss. Jared had seen fit to see to Jensen's needs again, especially after what he called 'such an awesome blowjob'. Which meant that Jensen was pretty much worn out and was sleeping happily, his body a warm weight on top of Jared, when Jeffrey and Stevie returned. He didn't hear the garage door open, although Jared did. Jeffrey looked in on them, smiling when he saw the state they were in. Stevie appeared behind him, resting her head on his shoulder, and Jared felt his insides clench when she kissed his whiskery cheek.

 

He stamped down on the feeling, knowing that he really had to make an effort today. The argument with Jeffrey last time had left him drained, and with the knowledge that he was in the wrong. It wasn't a nice feeling.

 

"You boys have a good morning?" Jeffrey asked, wrapping one arm around Stevie as he held the door open. She chuckled in his ear and tried to pull him back into the house, telling him it was kind of obvious that they had. Jared smiled at that, and then stopped himself.

 

"Yeah. We saw a movie. You?"

 

Stevie answered, and he shouldn't have been surprised. Her face was filled with excitement as she told him that Jeffrey had taken her out on his Harley, and that maybe they hadn't exactly stuck to the speed limit for the whole ride.

 

Jared ran his hand down the center of Jensen's back, hearing a soft moan in response, and told her that there really was no other way to ride a bike like that.

 

"Oh, god no. I wouldn't argue with that." He saw her glancing around the garage, and then she took a step forward. "You've got a Ducati in here too?"

 

He frowned. "Uh, yeah... She needs a little fixing up still, but-"

 

"If anyone can do it, Jay can," Jeffrey told her. "He fixed his own and he sometimes works on other people's."

 

"You're pretty good with machines then?" Stevie asked.

 

Jared shrugged. "I guess."

 

"It's a handy skill to have, though. You obviously do a good job."

 

He was going to answer to that, but a loud moan from Jensen turned everyone's attention his way. Trying not to laugh, Jared stroked his back again, lifting his head to kiss the side of Jensen's face. "Hey, man... You want to join us?"

 

Jensen mumbled something against Jared's skin, blinking sleepily. He stumbled quickly into consciousness when he heard Stevie's voice, though.

 

"We'll wait inside for you guys. We fetched something from the deli, okay?"

 

They had already turned and shut the door to the house behind them before Jensen fully sat up and stared down at Jared with wide eyes. "Did I just-"

 

"Relax. I think they thought it was kind of cute."

 

"Cute? How long were they _there_?"

 

"Don't worry about it. Find a sweater and come on in the house. Lunchtime."

 

Cheeks flaming, Jensen let Jared up and caught the hooded sweatshirt that was flung in his direction. He pulled it on, glad to get warm and cover up. Before they reached the door, he pulled Jared back and kissed him quietly.

 

"You going to behave today?" He asked.

 

Jared closed his eyes briefly and nodded. "Yeah. Scout's honour."

 

Stevie was at the table already, setting things out for their meal. She frowned when she saw Jensen's face and he remembered that there were scabs and bruises still visible there.

 

"Everything okay, Jensen?" She asked, watching him.

 

"Yeah. I... Got into a fight."

 

She nodded, noticing the way Jared was looking at her and clearly not wanting to make a scene. "Hope you won."

 

Jensen just shrugged, and looked away. He helped Jeffrey get some more things from the refrigerator and poured out some drinks while Jared sat himself down, knowing that if he tried to help he would only get in the way. They were soon all seated and eating and, to Jensen's surprise and relief, Jared actually joined in some of the conversation. Stevie cleverly turned it around to talking about the Harley, and about the bikes out in the garage, and Jared didn't seem to notice that he was holding most of the conversation by himself in the end. Jensen squeezed his knee under the table and he trailed off, ducking his head.

 

"Ain't this a lot better than Thanksgiving?" Jeffrey said, dusting crumbs from his hands. 

 

"Jeff.." Stevie reached over and closed her hand over one of his, shaking her head slightly. There was no need to bring up what had happened before.

 

"Just sayin'", he shrugged. "Maybe we should've just got talking about the bikes before, huh Jay?"

 

Jared took the hint. He put his food down and looked up. "I'm sorry, Stevie. About last time. And you can stop looking at me like that, Dad. I do know how to apologise, y'know."

 

Stevie grinned at that, and Jensen laughed. 

 

"I'm just stunned that you did."

 

"Well, maybe I got a favor to ask, too."

 

"Oh, right. Alternative motives, of course."

 

He didn't answer that and they finished their meal in relative quiet. As they were tidying away, Jeffrey's phone rang and he groaned when he saw the caller ID, but answered anyway. He had to. Jensen guessed it was work from what he was saying, and that Jeffrey was agreeing to rush back and sort out a problem.

 

"Do you want me to go?" Stevie asked, as he hung up. He held her by the arms and kissed her quickly. 

 

"No, it's just a little thing that they need me there for. I'll be about thirty minutes, tops. So you can stay, make yourself comfortable. I'm sure the boys can behave a while longer. You're not gonna do anything stupid, right Jay?"

 

Jared gave him a cheeky smile. "Sure thing, Jeff. I ran out of places to hide bodies anyhow."

 

Jeff didn't laugh, told him he wasn't funny.

 

"Well, jeez, I wasn't _trying_ to be."

 

"It works out well anyway," Stevie interrupted. "I have something I'd like to talk to the boys about without you listening in. Go on, get!" She shooed him towards the door and as soon as he was gone the three of them went back to tidying up. Jared seemed tense again, like now the threat of Jeff wasn't in the room he thought maybe he didn't have to be so nice. But he wanted to ask Stevie something, and he wasn't going to alienate her before she agreed to it.

 

"So, what's up?" Jensen asked, as the three of them sat down in the lounge together. It was uncomfortable again, but they all ignored it.

 

"Well, I was thinking of getting Jeffrey a dog for Christmas. A puppy, really. Something from one of the rescue centers. Do you think he'd go for that? It's just we were talking about animals and he said he used to have this dog-"

 

"Yeah," Jared interjected. "Back when I was a kid. When he first met Mom. She was this little Rottweiler mixed breed."

 

"Do you think he'd like something similar to that?"

 

Jared shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

 

"What about you? Would you guys be okay with it?"

 

Jensen nodded. He loved dogs. He'd always wanted one of his own, but his father had insisted he wouldn't be able to deal with one, so it was an argument that he hadn't bothered with too often. He started when Jared slapped his knee.

 

"Can I ask you something now?"

 

Stevie smiled. "Of course, Jared."

 

"You know what goes on at that school, right? With Jensen and that Doug Freeman asshole?" Jared ignored Jensen's sudden protest, shook off the hand on his arm. "So what can you do about it for him? You must have some kind of power over that idiot, don't you?"

 

Stevie stared at him for a moment, her mouth open, then shifted her gaze to Jensen who fidgeted under the scrutiny. "That was Doug? That was the argument that was being talked about in the staff room last week?"

 

Jared snorted. "A little more than an argument, don't you think? Didn't Jeff say anything?"

 

"Maybe he thought it wasn't his place," Jensen snapped, standing.

 

"Yeah, maybe. I happen to think it's mine, Jen. You sure as hell weren't gonna say anything, were you?"

 

"You really think it's fair, considering the relationship between-"

 

"Yes, I think it's fucking fair!" Jared waved a hand at Stevie. "What good is it to not ask, just because she's dating Jeff? You think anyone at your school even knows about this?"

 

"It doesn't matter! Doug Freeman's above anything in that school. There's only a couple teachers that'll tell him some of his work is wrong or not good enough, but then next thing you know it doesn't even matter. He's still scoring the high grades and walking round like he owns the place!"

 

Jared ignored him, turning back to Stevie. "He wrote 'fag' on Jensen's stomach. Hit him 'til he couldn't stand. And you want to sit there and tell me there's nothing anyone at that shit-heap school can do?"

 

"I'm not going to try and tell you anything, Jared," Stevie answered, and Jensen was impressed at how calm she still sounded. "Doug's been punished for what he did. And yes, I know it was by no means a fair punishment, especially given what was done to Chris Kane. But I can't punish him again for this. It's against school policy. I will go and speak to the principal, though. First thing Monday morning. And I'll look out for Jensen at school as much as I can. That's what you want, right? Because you love him and you can't be there to look after him... You just want to make sure that somebody is." She looked directly into his eyes. "I promise I'll do as much as I can. Although I can't promise that will be much."

 

Jared nodded, satisfied. He didn't thank her, and he didn't say anything else, but the look on his face showed his relief. She told Jensen that it might not be much, that she didn't have much sway, and that he was important to her. The room fell silent after that and Jensen couldn't face the awkwardness of it. He headed to the garage, unsurprised when he heard Jared get up and follow, with a few mumbled words to Stevie before he went. He had so much he wanted to say to Jared and plenty more he wanted to throw at him, but in the end he just collapsed onto the sofa and curled into the other man as soon as he joined him, unmoving and quiet.

 

 

 

 

They heard Jeffrey come back a while later. Jared went out to speak to him and, to Jensen's relief, there were no raised voices. Probably meant they were talking about him, but whatever. He heard the Harley pulling out and figured Jeffrey and Stevie had gone back to her place for the evening. Jared returned with two cold beers and handed one to Jensen as he sat down with him again. It was then that Jensen's phone rang.

 

"Who is it?" Jared asked, pulling the younger man into his arms as he checked his phone from his sweater pocket.

 

"My brother," came the reply, as Jensen answered. "Josh?"

 

"Hey, Jensen. Are you okay?"

 

"Sure. Why wouldn't I be?"

 

"Mom told us what happened to you. I thought maybe I'd better ask. Since you don't seem to like calling us any more and telling us what's going on."

 

Jensen felt a sharp twinge of guilt at his brother's tone. "I'm sorry. I just... I'm scared that Dad'll find out I called you and come down on you all like the giant ass that he is."

 

"Maybe he would, but for this kind of thing? It's worth it to know you're all right. Besides. He knows now."

 

A long pause. " _What_?"

 

"He was here last night when Mom got back. Wanted to know where the hell she'd been. She started crying, you know how Mom is, and she told him what happened to you."

 

"She _told_ him?" Jensen felt sick, and he shrugged Jared away, sitting forward.

 

"Yeah. The whole works. Guess she couldn't help herself once she'd started."

 

His eyes were hot and he was struggling to think. "She told him what happened at school," he said. "And she told him why?"

 

"That Freeman is apparently a homophobic little dick. I figured you'd want to know that she just outed you to Dad."

 

He felt his throat start to constrict and swallowed as much as he could, his mouth feeling thick and too hot. 

 

"And so now Dad's not speaking to her. Pissed at her for sneaking out to see you behind his back. Pissed at her for keeping it from him. Pissed because he thinks it's her fault you're gay."

 

"Josh, _stop_... I'm sorry, okay? I don't know what else to say to you."

 

"I'm not the one you have to say anything to. Maybe you should just come home and try and fix this. Dad wants you here so he can protect you better. Says now he knows, he can sort it out."

 

Jensen grimaced, the taste on his tongue acidic as he spoke. "I know what he means by that, Josh. And no. I'm happy where I am. I'm in love and I'm being looked after here. So no. I don't want to come back to that. It's not that I don't still think of him as my father, I do. I wish he could be a proper father to me. If he could accept it, if he could let me be who I want and see who I want, then maybe. But you and I both know he's not going to do that. Not ever."

 

"It's your choice, Jensen. I know that. You're old enough to do what you want with your life. I just wish you could see what you're doing to our family."

 

Josh didn't give him a chance to answer before he hung up, and Jensen blinked and rubbed at his itchy eyes. He tossed his phone onto the pile of magazines at his feet and then turned back to Jared, burrowing against his side. Folding his hands into the creases of Jared's sweater and pulling him into a kiss. Jared just let him.

 

 

 

 

It was dark when Jensen woke up. He felt tired, still, and he knew that was tiredness left over from what Doug had done to him. From the painkillers he had to take now and again, just to stop the bruises hurting too much. Jared was gone from beside him, but Jensen could hear him moving about on the upper level.

 

"Jay?"

 

The answer wasn't quite what he expected, as Jay shouted down, "You feel up to going out?"

 

"Where're we going?"

 

"Just a ride. Might end up somewhere, might not. Just feel like getting out of the house. Are you up to it?"

 

Jensen looked around, listened to the quiet. There wasn't anything worth staying in for if Jared wasn't going to be with him, he thought. "Sure."

 

Jared came down then, already shrugging into his leather jacket. He sat down next to Jensen to pull his boots on, leaning across to kiss him halfway through doing so. They got ready and picked up their helmets, and Jensen opened the garage door while Jared got the bike going. 

 

The route they took was unfamiliar at first, although Jensen supposed that was down to it being so dark and late already. The roads were fairly quiet at this end of town, even for a Saturday evening, and it wasn't until they reached the highway that they saw a lot of other traffic. Jared kept a good speed up, though he didn't open the throttle completely until they turned onto a deserted back road. Jensen clung on tighter, not realizing that they'd taken this road once before. He didn't figure it out until he saw the signs, and he dug his fingers into Jared's sides like that would actually make him stop.

 

Jared pulled the bike into the parking lot of Mickey's and this time he parked around the front, alongside several other huge choppers. Jensen was off the bike in moments, lifting his helmet off. 

 

"Are you insane?" He asked, as Jared pulled off his own helmet. "You remember what happened last time you brought me out here?!"

 

"Yeah, I remember. But you're a lot tougher than you were back then." Jared grinned. "Relax, Jensen. I'm not here to start a fight. We'll leave if anything starts to happen. I just need to speak to someone and then we can go."

 

"And I have to come with you?"

 

"Yes, you have to come with me. So there."

 

"Won't he kick me out again?"

 

"Only if you try to order alcohol. Go sit in the corner, I'll bring you a beer soon as I'm done talking to Rock."

 

Jensen didn't really like that idea, but he liked the idea of having Rock throw him out in front of everyone even less. So, once inside, he did as he was told.

 

The bar seemed a lot darker than he remembered. Maybe it was just the music that was playing, but it felt much more like the wrong place to be than it had before. Jensen sat as far away from all the other patrons as he could, glancing around the room. He felt his heart jump when he noticed Chuck and a few of his buddies sat near the pool tables. They were watching Jared, but didn't move. Obviously too lazy to start trouble tonight. Hopefully. Jensen shrank back further into his seat and kept his eyes on Jared until the other man was nearing him with an open beer in each hand.

 

"Can we go?" Jensen asked.

 

"Sure. When you've finished your drink."

 

"No, now. Please?"

 

"Why?"

 

Jensen nodded towards Chuck, who was no longer paying them any attention.

 

"Him? He won't come over here again. Me and Jeffrey kicked his ass last time, he sure won't want a repeat performance."

 

"Aren't you worried about your bike?"

 

"Jen, stop it. I'm keeping an eye on him as much as he is on me. Don't sweat it. One drink and then we'll go. No trouble."

 

Relenting, Jensen shuffled to the side as Jared sat beside him and handed him his beer. He didn't feel much like drinking, so he sat there and scratched his fingernails at the edge of the label, watching Chuck without looking directly at him all the while.

 

"What is it with him, anyway?" He asked, after a short time. "I mean, what's his problem with you?"

 

"He thinks I ratted him out to the cops. I used to ride with him. Was going through one of my uncontrollable phases. Jeff kept trying to keep me in, didn't want me coming here. 'Course, the more he tried, the more I came out here anyway. Addicted to the beer and the company. His own fault for introducing me, I guess. Chuck kept me in beer, in return I'd help him out when he needed something. Fixed his bike up a couple of times when it needed repairs. He told me stories about prison in return. Real nice guy, just the kind I wanted to hang around."

 

Jensen shook his head at that, but said nothing, wanting Jared to finish the story.

 

"Remember I told you about the liquor store robbery when I was seventeen? That was Chuck, too. We were going to hit five in one night, one each for me, him, and his other partners. Well, they all got theirs no problem, and they got away too. Me? I got caught before I even started. So I gave the cops some names and places, kept 'em happy. Kept Jeff happy. He said he didn't want me back unless I could learn to do the right thing, so I tried to clean up after that. Stole that bike a year later out of desperation, but it got returned. Cops were never called and Jeff helped me out of it. Said if I ever got in trouble again I had to tell him."

 

"So what about... When we met?"

 

Jared shrugged. "He wasn't around for me to tell. I needed money, quick. So I went to get it the best way I knew how. You kind of ruined the plan though."

 

"Are you glad?" Jensen asked, hating himself for sounding like such a girl. Jared obviously didn't notice or mind, though, or perhaps he just didn't feel like picking on him for once.

 

"Yeah. Sure I am. No regrets, Jen. That's how I feel like living."

 

"You finished with your beer?"

 

 

 

 

They didn't get each other off that night. Jared traced his fingers along the lines of Jensen's tattoos, his chest against the younger man's back, and kissed his shoulder as he worked his way around them. It had been a tough day and between them they had little energy left, although Jared talked in a soft voice as he continued to touch.

 

He told Jensen that he wouldn't let anyone hurt him now. Not again. He told him that Alan Ackles could go fuck himself if he wasn't prepared to love his son again. He told him that Jensen had changed him, screwed him up and straightened him out just by being who he was, and that he'd never forgive him, or thank him enough, for that. Jensen chuckled at that one, a half-laugh breathed out against the sheets that were pulled up against his neck.

 

Jared told him that he was sorry for all the things he'd done wrong, and grateful for all the things he'd done right. He told him he was beautiful and that his tattoos were beautiful too. He told him that he could be a big girl sometimes - Ah, there it was - and that he shouldn't ever stop that because it was one of the reasons Jared was holding him like this right now. He whispered in Jensen's ear that if he ever wanted Jared to let go, he only had to ask. He continued to tell him that there was no guarantee that he'd listen, though.

 

He reassured him that just because Chris hadn't been in touch, it didn't mean that he was mad over what had happened. It was more likely that he couldn't get in touch, not that he didn't want to.

 

Jared told him, as the pull of sleep grew too strong and Jensen's eyes began to close, that he would take him. Before Christmas, he would have him like he wanted to have him. Jensen didn't need to ask what he meant.

 

He knew.


	29. Chapter twenty-seven

Sleeping in was one of the best parts of the weekend. Spending time with Jared in general was always great, but getting all warm and comfortably entangled with each other was the best. Part of Jensen felt bad that he didn't attend church anymore. Another part associated church with his father and, while some twisted little piece of him missed Alan and wished they could sort things out, the association was too much for him. Right now, anyway. He was still hurt from everything that had happened with Alan.

 

Breath hitching in his throat, Jensen awoke to the feel of kisses pressed to his back and shoulders. He mumbled a partial-protest, partial-encouragement and leaned back into the embrace. Jared's hands were busy underneath the covers, tracing the lines of muscle at Jensen's stomach, along his hips, and lower still.

 

"Mm, stop," Jensen finally said, his voice thick with sleep.

 

"Why?" Jared spoke hoarsely into his ear.

 

"Because," he laughed, pushing back against him. "I really have to take a leak, man."

 

Jared chuckled, his hands still exploring. "Well, you're already hard," he said. "Why don't we use it?"

 

"Because, I have to _pee_ ," Jensen said, louder this time. "Let me up."

 

Jared sighed and rolled onto his back, giving up. "Alright," he reluctantly agreed. "We should get going anyway."

 

Swinging his legs over the side of the bed, Jensen turned just enough to look at Jared. "For what?"

 

Jared tucked one of his arms behind his head, his other hand resting against his bare chest. "See if Eric can work on you some more?" he suggested. "Your bruises are looking pretty good."

 

Jensen looked down at his tattooed arm. It was true; he was healing fast. Oddly enough, the only bruise that seemed to be holding on with a vengeance was a faint handprint shaped around his left wrist, where one of Doug's boys had held him down. "Yeah," he agreed. "Okay. Dinner's on me. Thai?"

 

Jared smiled brighter. They would eat a late breakfast, so an early dinner would work out well. "I'd eat Thai food off of you," he teased.

 

Jensen rolled his eyes and chuckled softly. "Shut up," he returned. "You know what I mean."

 

 

 

 

Jensen hissed through his teeth, but tried not to pull away from Eric. The man was very good at his work, but he wasn't responsible for a mistake when his canvas kept jerking away from him. He had been a little stunned when he'd first laid eyes on Jensen, even though the bruises were fading.

 

"Jesus Christ, kid," he'd breathed. He took Jensen's chin in his hand and turned his head from side to side. "Who the hell fucked you up?"

 

Jensen had tried to smile, shrugging his shoulders. "Just some guys at school," he answered. "I'm okay."

 

"I hope you got a few shots in to those bastards, too."

 

"A few," he'd lied. He'd barely gotten one, but why go into that now?

 

Eric had examined his arm where there had been a bad bruise, and declared that they could work around the contusion for now. Each time he hurt Jensen, though, he apologized. "Sorry, kid," he said yet again. "You don't need no more hurt, and here I am being paid to hurt you."

 

"It's okay," he returned with a gentle smile. "Just a sensitive spot is all."

 

"I know a better sensitive spot," Jared grinned.

 

Eric peered over at Jared, pointing a latex-gloved finger at him. "Keep it in your pants, Padalecki," he warned.

 

"Jesus Christ, I'd better," Jared laughed. "Or else you might _tattoo_ it."

 

Eric nodded, setting to work again on Jensen's sleeve. "I could at least make it look bigger," he replied, not missing a beat.

 

"Oh, ouch," Jared scowled with a hearty laugh. "Jensen doesn't have a problem with it. Well, sometimes, when he--"

 

"Jared," Eric warned. "No one's ever died in here before. Don't be the first."

 

Jared laughed and put his feet up. He stretched out, gazing up at some of the designs on the wall. He'd been thinking about getting another tattoo, maybe around his calf or something. He wasn't sure yet. He wondered how he could convince Jensen to get his nippled pierced next. That would be amazingly hot and it--

 

He must've lost himself in thinking because he suddenly realized the buzzing in the room had stopped and Eric was standing.

 

"Alright, we can stop there for a few minutes," the man said. "I gotta visit the used beer department." He stepped over the cords on the floor and headed to the bathroom. 

 

Sprawled out on the cot, Jensen sighed and tried to relax. He glanced at the underside of his arm where Eric had been working. The bruises weren't bad there, just yellowing, and the bright blues of the ink underneath the surface looked much more cheerful than the scars of the beating.

 

"How you holding up?" Jared asked.

 

Jensen turned to look at him, setting his free hand to his bare belly, where his shirt was pooled. "Okay," he agreed. "Did you find a place for dinner?"

 

Jared tossed aside the Yellow Pages that he'd been perusing. "Yeah, we'll find a place. There's one I know of, really fantastic, about fifteen minutes away, depending on traffic."

 

"Okay."

 

With a rather evil grin, Jared moved in closer, wheeling his chair nearer so that he could give Jensen a kiss that lingered probably a little too long for Eric's taste. "You look fucking brilliant with that tat," he said. He heard Jensen mumble a disbelieving thank you, but his attention was already diverted, eyes downcast so that he looked at Jensen's chest. He reached out, brushed his fingertips over one of the dark pink nipples. "You should get rings next." He started to lean down, mouth open, to Jensen's chest.

 

Jensen squirmed underneath Jared's touch. He backed away as much as he could and used both hands to push at him. "Stop," he said. "Not here."

 

"Why not?" Jared grinned. "You were okay with it in the theater."

 

"No one could see us in the theater!"

 

Suddenly, Jared's chair was wheeled backwards, hard, and he bumped up against the desk that held ink and needles, and other supplies. Smiling, Jared looked up to find Eric there beside him. "Hi," he said innocently.

 

"It's hard enough working around those bruises, Padalecki," Eric reprimanded. "I don't need to work around his hard-on, too."

 

Mortified, Jensen could feel his ears growing hot, his face turning bright red. If he could have, he would have crawled underneath the paper towels Eric had set out. He heard Jared's laughter, but he didn't see the two men mock wrestling, wrapped up in his own embarassed little world. 

 

 

 

 

The bike needed gas. Jared pulled into a station and set the kickstand. Jensen's arm burned where Eric had worked on him, but he already knew the rewards of such pain. He got off the bike and stretched. "I gotta use the bathroom," he said. He headed around the side of the building while Jared started to fuel up the bike.

 

On his way out of the restroom, Jensen heard his cell phone chirp at him. He stopped walking, reached into his jeans pocket and fished out his cell. He didn't think to look at the caller ID, and flipped it open to pick up the call. It was a bad connection, staticky and crackling. 

 

"Hello?"

 

"--nsen? Th--our--fa."

 

Scowling, Jensen took a few steps away from the building, thinking maybe that would help. "Hello?" he said again.

 

"Hello."

 

That word came through clearly, and Jensen felt a rush of adrenaline hit his veins. "Dad?"

 

"Of _course_."

 

He didn't know why Alan was calling him, and for a moment, he was scared again, just like he had been when he was living at home. The feeling quickly passed though, leaving him to wonder if he should just hang up. "What's wrong?" The words were out of his mouth before he could stop them.

 

"I've been thinking, JR," Alan said, his words slurring as he spoke. "I have to tell you something."

 

"Are you drunk, Dad?" He looked down at his watch. It was barely six in the evening. It wasn't unusual for Alan to get drunk, but it was a little early for him.

 

"I am slightly inebriated, yes," Alan agreed. "But that's not the point."

 

Even though Jensen could readily envision his father's heavy lidded eyes glaring over at him, each eye blinking independently of the other, he tried to sound annoyed. "Alright, so what?" he asked.

 

There was a hiss of static, a few popping noises and only the tail-end of Alan's words reached Jensen's ears.

 

"What?" 

 

After another crackle from the bad connection, Alan's voice became audible again. "I said I'm sorry."

 

Jensen had never heard those words come from his father. Furrowing his brow, he could feel his head start to pound. "Sorry?" he repeated. "For what?"

 

"I can't do this anymore, Jensen."

 

He didn't like it. "Can't do what?" he asked. "Dad, what are you talking about?"

 

There was a pause, one that Jensen was sure was filled with a frown and a disappointed, drunken headshake. "I can't pretend that I'm okay with this," he explained. 

 

Shaking his own head, Jensen refused to accept that as an answer. He knew what his Dad wasn't okay with, why was that anything new? "You know I'm willing to work on anything here, Dad. Tell me what to do."

 

Alan chuckled just barely loud enough for Jensen to hear. "Anything? Only not the one thing I asked of you."

 

"We can get over that, Dad. Please..."

 

"I can't," he returned. "I don't think _I_ am willing." 

 

There was the truth. Alan didn't want to fight for his son, to work out any differences they had. He had a son that he didn't care to admit was his and that hurt more than Jensen thought it would have. He used to think he didn't care, but now he knew that wasn't true. "Dad," he spoke.

 

"I certainly can't stop you from seeing your mother, or your sister and brother," Alan continued, ignoring Jensen's pleading tone. "I would prefer, however, that you do not show up at the house. And I, of course, will not take your calls or your company."

 

He was drunk. He was fucking _drunk_ and he didn't mean any of it. But no matter how many times Jensen told himself that, he knew it wasn't true. "Dad." His eyes burned.

 

"I'm sorry, Jensen," he said again. "This is how it has to be."

 

"Dad, _please_."

 

“Goodbye, Jensen."

 

And the phone cut out. Jensen tried to breathe, but found that it hurt him to do so. No matter what differences he and his father had, he had always thought that, while a rift would always remain between them, they could at least repair some of the damage Jensen had inflicted upon the family. His eyes burned with tears that he didn't want to let fall. He ran his tongue over his teeth and cleared his throat, doing his best to compose himself before heading back over to Jared. Pinching at the bridge of his nose and wiping at his eyes, he rid himself of any evidence of tears and then pocketed his cell phone. 

 

Jared turned when he heard Jensen's footsteps. He could tell something was wrong, but he didn't push the subject more than to ask if everything was alright. 

 

"Yeah," Jensen answered, nodding his head. "Let's go."

 

 

 

 

Dancing hadn't been what interested him that night. Instead, Jensen found comfort at the bar, downing one shot after another, kicking back as many beers as he could. He liked the bite of the alcohol, how it made his head swim, his thoughts cloudy. 

 

Not cloudy enough, though. He could still recall his father's words, could still tell how they had affected him. He could still feel and he didn't like it. 

 

Looking around the bar, Jensen's gaze finally landed upon Jared. He was a fair distance away, talking to two women. They clearly thought they had a chance with him, and Jensen felt jealousy surge through him. Of course they thought they had a chance with him. Maybe they did, he decided. After all, Jared had hinted that he'd played both sides before.

 

Gritting his teeth, Jensen turned away from Jared and the women. He closed his eyes, listening to the pounding bass in the club. He took a deep breath and opened his eyes again, gaze falling to the shot glass before him. Raising the shot to his mouth, Jensen was just about to drink it down when someone's hand reached out and stopped him. He looked over to find Jared beside him. 

 

"You're going to regret that in the morning," Jared warned.

 

Jensen pulled out of his grasp, still looking at him. "Yeah, well, I won't _now_ ," he said, his temper on a much shorter fuse than usual. 

 

Jared watched him down the shot, grunting and shaking his head against the bite and burn of alcohol in his throat and chest. "You want to talk about it?"

 

"You know what I want?" Jensen said, turning to him. "I want to fucking _dance_." He stepped closer to Jared, nose to nose. "And I want to fucking dance with you."

 

Jared didn't like Jensen when he was angry and drunk, but he wasn't going to get anything out of him by pushing and shoving. He'd learned that much about the young man. Nodding his head, Jared agreed to a dance. As he moved out to the floor, he signalled to the bartender, waving his hand near his throat, silently telling the barkeep that Jensen was cut off for the night.

 

Though they both kept their shirts on this time, there was the same amount of bumping hips, grinding motions, arched backs and exploring hands. Jensen put his back up against Jared's chest, reaching back to pull Jared's mouth down to his throat. Jared let him, a watchful eye upon Jensen's movements. He noticed that Jensen moved harder than he did before, his actions angry and intoxicated. He danced with his eyes closed, arms swinging, feet keeping time with the music, shutting out everyone and everything. 

 

Not seeing where he was going, Jensen bumped hard into another patron at the club. He opened his eyes and looked over at the man, already angry for being interrupted. "Watch where you're going, asshole," he spat.

 

The man, at least three inches taller than Jensen, glared down at him. "Why don't you watch your fuckin' fagass, first?" he snarled back.

 

Jensen stared at the man for only a second more before he hauled himself at him. He was the first to swing, the first to land a decent punch, but the guy was up and charging at Jensen in a heartbeat. Jared quickly put himself between them, pushing the patron back to where he had been. When the crowd joined in, both sides restraining the fighting men, Jared looked back over to Jensen.

 

"What the hell are you _doing_?" he asked.

 

"Kicking his ass!" Jensen nearly yelled. " _You_ taught me."

 

Jared shook his head at him. "I _taught_ you to defend yourself, not be a class A jerk." He turned to the enraged patron and pulled out a couple of bills from his wallet. He said something to the man, probably an apology for Jensen's behavior, stuffed the bills in his hand and turned back to Jensen. "Come on," he snarled. "We're out of here."

 

 

 

 

The ride back had been a chilly one. Jensen had worked up a good sweat dancing and seething with anger. When they got back to the garage, he ransacked Jared's things to find a sweatshirt to pull over the faded Spinal Tap T-shirt he had previously swiped.

 

He snagged a beer from the refrigerator, ignoring Jared's concerned look. He flipped the twist-off cap across the room and headed back up the ladder again.

 

Jared had only showed him once that they could get out onto the roof of the garage. Jensen had declared a fear of heights and admitted that even the second floor of the loft was almost too much. He had rarely, if ever, ventured out on the roof. Until now. A beer rested between his knees, the hooded sweatshirt pulled tight over his frame, the sleeves too long and covering most of his fiingers. He heard the footsteps behind him, but didn't turn around to see who it was. He knew it was Jared, and he knew he would probably have to tell him what had happened. He didn't want to. He just wanted to be left alone for a little while.

 

"I thought you didn't like coming out here," Jared grunted as he sat down behind Jensen.

 

Jensen looked up at the stars. "I just wanted to tonight."

 

"Why?"

 

He shrugged. "Just felt like being alone."

 

"What's up?"

 

"Stars."

 

Jared smirked and put his arms around Jensen. "You know what I mean, wiseass."

 

Jensen leaned back against him. He wanted to collapse completely into Jared's arms, but he was still mulling everything over. "Nothing," he said, trying to sound cheerful. "I'm just hanging out."

 

Jared smiled and planted a kiss to the side of Jensen's head. "Liar," he said. "Come on. The way you've been acting tonight, something's wrong."

 

Jensen shook his head.

 

"I was going to let you come to me, but that's clearly not going to happen," he continued. "So come on. Out with it."

 

"Know what we should do?" he asked, avoiding the topic of conversation. "We should take a road trip down route sixty-six sometime. Wouldn't that be great?" His speech was awkward, slightly slurred, but at least he was still coherent.

 

"Jensen."

 

"Someday, you should open a bar, too," he continued. 

 

"I didn't come out here to talk about operating a bar someday," he chided. "I came out to see what's wrong."

 

"But you'd be great at running one," Jensen said. "People just, they flock to you, no matter where you are."

 

"Jen, come on."

 

"I don't know if it'd be better in the city or out in the middle of nowhere though," he replied. "What do you think?"

 

Sighing, Jared pushed Jensen back up to sit up on his own. He got up from his place on the garage roof and headed back inside. "Come talk to me, when you can stop being an asshole."

 

Jensen's forced smile faded and he sighed. Why couldn't Jared have just left him alone, and let him work through this? Now he had Dad and Jared pissed off at him. It wasn't that he didn't trust Jared. He just had wanted to drown his sorrows for a little while and forget who he was, where he was. He lay out flat on the roof, one arm flung over his eyes as he tried to put away his hurt feelings for now. Sitting up, he finished off the last of his beer and finally made his way back into the garage, teetering slightly. Jared was laying in bed, wearing drawstring sweatpants and looking over a manual for the Ducati. 

 

The lights in the garage seemed overly bright. He squinted for a minute until his eyes adjusted. He felt a wave of drunken exhaustion hit him, and he wanted nothing more than to declare this day over. "He disowned me," he finally spoke.

 

At those three words, Jared looked over to Jensen, sudden concern and sympathy shining in his eyes. "What?"

 

Jensen shrugged, hoping that his eyes felt hot only because he was tired, not because he was on the verge of tears. "He disowned me."

 

"He... Can he _do_ that?"

 

Laughing, Jensen nodded his head. "He can do whatever he wants. He's Alan fucking Ackles."

 

Only one tear slid down Jensen's face before Jared was on his feet and moving towards him. He pulled Jensen into his arms with probably a bit too much force and held him tightly. His jaw clenched, his anger now directed towards the man that had hurt Jensen. He closed his eyes for a moment when he heard Jensen sniffle back his tears. Pulling back enough to look into Jensen's eyes, Jared set his palm to the side of the young man's head. "Come to bed," he said. "We'll forget about all of this for a little while."

 

While he didn't particularly feel like doing anything other than crying and sleeping, Jensen agreed. He wanted to do anything to make him forget the phone conversation he'd had with Alan. Jared didn't take over like he'd thought he would though. Instead, he helped Jensen out of his clothes, all but his boxer briefs and maneuvered him into bed. He bundled Jensen up in his arms and the blankets of the bed and curled around him, pressing his chest to Jensen's back. He flicked off the light and in just a few minutes, Jensen's eyes grew heavy, his limbs felt like they were made of lead, but at the same time lighter than air. He felt himself start to give in to the exhaustion that had been trying to take over for quite awhile.

 

"Jay?"

 

"Hm?"

 

"Who was your first?"

 

He didn't know where the sudden curiosity had come from, but he wanted to squash it. "Jen, shut up," he reprimanded gently.

 

Against protest from every fiber of his being, Jensen moved. He turned around to face Jared, draping one of his arms over the man's waist. "Come on," he asked again. "Tell me?"

 

"Why?"

 

"Because I want to know."

 

Jared shook his head and smiled. "You don't _need_ to know."

 

"Was it Trevor?"

 

He closed his eyes for a moment. "No," he answered.

 

"Who, then?"

 

"Jensen, I'm not going to play--"

 

Abruptly, Jensen silenced him with a kiss, warm and wet. He kept his eyes open to watch him, touched his tongue to Jared's. When he eased back, he stayed close enough to let their lips brush up against each other's. "Tell me," he said softly. "Please?"

 

Jared eyed him for a moment, unsure if he should go through with it. It didn't matter, because it was before he'd met Jensen, he knew, but a part of him, no matter how much he loved and trusted Jensen, told him to keep some secrets to himself. Finally, he sighed and gave in. "Alright," he said. "I was fourteen. His name was Jamie. I was with him and his girlfriend."

 

Even at fourteen, Jared had been a player in a game that Jensen had never been part of before. It didn't really surprise Jensen, of course. He wasn't jealous; he loved Jared no matter what. He just wished he could have met him all those years ago. "He was your first?"

 

Jared nodded. "Yeah."

 

"For everything?"

 

He nodded again. "For everything."

 

"He sounds nice."

 

"He was," he agreed.

 

"Where is he now?"

 

"I don't know," he replied. 

 

Apparently satisfied, Jensen turned to lay back down in the bed next to Jared as he had been before. He felt Jared's arms curl around him, chest to his back, and the warmth sank into his bones again. His eyes grew heavy once more and he started to drift off. 

 

"Jay?" 

 

"What, Jen?"

 

"You're my first."

 

Jared leaned in slightly and pressed a kiss to the back of Jensen's head. He was struck by the sudden swell of love he felt in his heart at those few words. "I know," he said into his hair.

 

 

 

 

 

Monday morning arrived with cold sunshine and chirping birds. It also arrived with a shake to Jared's shoulder. "Jay."

 

He awoke quickly, taking a deep breath and turning over to find Jeffrey beside him. "Yeah," he said, his voice hoarse, heavy with sleep.

 

"You should check on Jensen in a little while," Jeffrey returned. "He's not feeling so hot."

 

Jared swiped his hands over his face, beard stubble scratching at his palms. "Beer before liquor makes you sicker," he almost chanted. He nodded to Jeffrey and patted the man's shoulder. "Thanks, I'll get him to school."

 

Jeffrey smiled. "I'm not sure he's going anywhere today."

 

"That bad?"

 

He nodded. "That bad." He straighened and headed to the ladder. "I'm out of here early, Jay. Hopefully, I can get home early."

 

"Later," Jared said with a floppy, sleepy wave of his hand.

 

Jared took a few minutes to completely wake himself up. They had finally gotten to bed around 3 AM, or thereabouts, and four hours of sleep wasn't nearly enough. As he lay in bed, still warm and comfortable, he started to feel himself slip back into unconsciousness. Forcing his eyes open wide, Jared made himself rise up out of the bed and get dressed. He managed to add a double-layered Teeshirt along with his sweatpants and padded barefoot into the house. He didn't hear the sound of the shower, or the strange song of someone brushing their teeth. Usually Jensen was making a good amount of noise by now.

 

Heading into the bathroom, Jared stopped in the doorway and leaned against the jamb. The room smelled of sickness. Jensen was on the floor, curled up near the toilet so that he could throw up at a moment's notice. Jared had been there, done that. It wasn't fun. Pushing away from the jamb, Jared knelt down beside Jensen and touched his shoulder. 

 

Jensen awoke abruptly, as if he'd been shaken violently. His gaze immediately landed on Jared, eyes bloodshot and accented with dark rings underneath the bottom row of long lashes. "Jay," he said, looking around the room. He seemed confused, as though he hadn't put himself in the bathroom. "What time is it?"

 

"Time to get you into bed," he returned. "You mixed your liquors, son. That's a big no-no."

 

"No, I have school," he told him. "Today's Monday, isn't it?"

 

Jared nodded. "Today's Monday," he agreed. "But you're not going to make it. You're a wreck." He took hold of Jensen's arms, planning on pulling him up to his feet, but Jensen instantly tried to work out of his grasp.

 

"Don't," he said. "I just want to lay here."

 

"You can't lay here," Jared argued.

 

"Why _not_?"

 

"What if someone has to take a piss?"

 

"Work around me," Jensen offered. 

 

Jared sighed and hauled Jensen to his feet with remarkable difficulty. "Come on," he encouraged, slinging Jensen's arm around his shoulders. Jensen groaned the whole time, so sure that his stomach was going to revolt against him. Instead of heading back out to the garage, Jared maneuvered Jensen into Jeffrey's bedroom. He set him down on the mattress and forced him to lay down. He pulled the covers up to his chin and found the trash bin in the room. He set it beside the bed and told Jensen that it was there in case he felt sick. But Jensen's eyes had been closed since he'd sat down on Jeffrey's bed. He was asleep again in seconds. 

 

Jared watched him, remembering the time he had done the same thing, and Jeffrey made him go to school anyway. He'd been just sixteen years old, and it was a hard lesson learned. A voice in the back of his head told him to wake Jensen and force him off to school. Lesson learned. Another voice told him that he had only gotten drunk because of what Alan had said to him, and there was no reason to add insult to injury. Best to just let him sleep it off.


	30. Chapter twenty-eight

  
Author's notes: **Two chapters today!**  


* * *

She still couldn't believe it. She had seen the bruises on Jensen's face. Jared had told her what they'd done. Jensen hadn't wanted him to, feeling that he was only adding fuel to the fire, but it was impossible to stop him. Jared had watched her reaction to Jensen's wounds, and was happy to see that she covered her hand with her mouth, disgusted by the display of ignorance mapped across Jensen's body. She was okay, Jared decided. She'd had the right reaction.

 

The news of what had happened at school had flashed around so quickly, that each story was different. Stevie had decided not to believe any of them. Now, she was left with a shaky, sick feeling.

 

"I can't promise anything," she'd told Jensen, sitting across from him. "I wish I could say I had the power to kick this kid's _ass_ , but I don't."

 

He had shrugged his shoulders. "I know," he said. "I don't expect you to do _any_ thing." He pointedly looked at Jared then, as if to say, _see? This is how that whole thing works_. Jared ignored him.

 

"It's not that I don't want to. Jensen, you guys are quickly becoming my family. _Anything_ that happens to you is important to me. I just wish I had more pull with the system."

 

And those words rang unbelievably true. Her attitude towards the school and Superintendent Cameron had quickly tarnished. She was furious with them for being so lax with Doug Freeman, yet crashing down on Chris Kane, who'd had nothing to do with any of it, really. She knew that she should leave well enough alone, and she had no intention of mouthing off to the Super on Monday morning. But she had stayed up most of Sunday night with Jeffrey, talking things over with him, and they had come to a couple of decisions. One, they liked each other. A lot. More than a lot, really. Stevie admitted that she couldn't imagine her life without him now, even though they had only been seeing each other a short time. Jeffrey admitted the same, in lesser words of course. 

 

Two, they had decided that, since her outlook on the school, staff and students had been jaded, she should do what she thought best, regardless of the consequences. Jeffrey smiled and told her, "Baby, you know you have my support no matter what."

 

"Which is why I love you," she'd grinned back.

 

They had professed their feelings to each other, of course, but those specific three words that she'd uttered were so beautiful to his ears. "You love me, huh?" he'd winked. 

 

She honestly hadn't even realized that that was the first time she'd ever really said that to him. She shrugged and wrinkled her nose at him when she smiled. "You're not bad, I guess," she had teased.

 

He'd swooped her up in his arms, twirling her around, leaving her clinging to his broad shoulders. "Too late, you already said it," he had laughed.

 

His words were still able to calm her nerves and anger as she stepped towards the Superintendent's office. The halls were scattered with kids who were on their way to second period, or just plain wandering the halls. Right or wrong, she didn't say anything to them, instead concentrating on moving down the corridors. 

 

In the main office, the secretary smiled over at her. "Hi, Stevie," she grinned. 

 

She didn't return the greeting, didn't smile back. "Is Mister Cameron in?"

 

Shelly's happy smile faded slightly. "He is," she nodded. "But he's with someone right now."

 

"Who?"

 

"Um, Donna Ackles," she said. "Why?"

 

What luck. Stevie nodded and passed by Shelly.

 

"Miss Kilworth, wait!" 

 

Stevie held a hand up to her. "What I have to say involves Mrs Ackles," she said. "Thank you, Shelly." She let herself into the office, clearly interrupting the meeting. She ignored the annoyed look that the Super gave her and held her hand out to Donna Ackles, who was sitting in front of the Super's desk. "Mrs Ackles, I'm--"

 

"Stevie Kilworth!" she exclaimed, standing to take the woman's hand. "Jensen has told me so much about you. I'd know you anywhere."

 

"All good I hope," she returned with a smile.

 

"Of course."

 

"Miss Kilworth, if you'll excuse us, we were in the middle of a meeting."

 

Stevie looked at Cameron and, instead of leaving the office, she sat down in the free chair next to Jensen's mother, who returned to her own seat. "I assure you, Mister Cameron," she said, sounding proper and more than a little angry, "everything I have to say has to do with what you were talking about with Mrs Ackles."

 

"I highly doubt that."

 

Before he could even finish his sentence completely, Stevie spoke. "I am here to give you my notice," she said.

 

Stunned, Cameron could only look at her for a moment. "What?" he finally asked.

 

"I'll finish the year out, of course," she told him. "But I won't be returning after the summer."

 

"And where are you _going_?"

 

"That doesn't concern you," she returned. "All you need to know is that because of what happened with Jensen Ackles and Doug Freeman, I no longer feel comfortable here at the school."

 

Cameron chuckled, shaking his head. "Miss Kilworth," he began, trying to appear friendly. "If you're worried about being attacked by one of the students, I can assure you--"

 

"That's the farthest thing from my mind," she told him. "But I _am_ concerned with the staff here."

 

"What about them?"

 

"Let's say, I'm more concerned with teaching my kids," she smiled, "and _less_ concerned with what family has the most money."

 

"That is _not_ how things are run here, Miss Kilworth, and I'll thank you to--"

 

This was not the day for Cameron to finish a sentence, because this time Donna Ackles interrupted him. "Yes, it is," she said, looking away from Stevie, and turning her gaze onto the Super. She nodded. "Yes, it is. My husband has contributed a great deal to this school, and so have the Kanes. We always pay extra on whatever tuition we owe, just like we did this year. We donate at every function you have. The fact that the Freemans have always donated more has always given young Doug the upper hand. And because they were the highest bidders, you let my son get bullied all these years. I didn't even know about it." She looked at Stevie, tears of guilt clouding her vision. "My Jensen hid it from me all this time. I had doubts when he would tell me about a bruise he got in gym class, or from walking into a doorway. Always some intricate lie. But I figured he was a boy, and boys would be boys. If he had a problem, he would come to his father and me." She shook her head and looked down at her hands. "He never did. I should have pushed him about it, I know that now. I should have come here sooner before this happened. Maybe then I could have made him--"

 

Stevie smiled and reached out to touch Donna's hand, grasping it in her own. "What you did is make him a good boy," she assured her. "A good, strong boy. We all love him dearly."

 

Frustrated with the turn of events, Cameron growled out a sigh. "Miss Kilworth," he almost sneered. "You seem overly attached to this young man. Perhaps an internal investigation--"

 

"I am _dating_ Jeffrey Morgan," she offered readily. The information made Cameron stumble. "I live part time at his home, where Jensen is currently residing."

 

That gave Cameron fuel again. "Speaking of which," he began, but was immediately cut off once more.

 

"He has my permission to live there," Donna said.

 

Completely annoyed, Cameron threw his pen down to the blotter on his desk and sighed. "Is that all?" he asked them. When neither of them spoke, he shrugged his shoulders. "I'm very sorry, Miss Kilworth, to be losing you next year, but I thank you for the ample warning. Mrs Ackles, Douglas Freeman's punishment has already been dealt. There's nothing I can do about that. However, I _will_ be following this up."

 

"With his parents?" Donna asked.

 

He nodded and didn't bother hiding the roll of his eyes. "With his parents."

 

 

 

 

 

School had just let out. Football practice was in full-swing by the time something on the sidelines caught Doug's attention. He did a double-take, eyeing the big guy just off the field. Then, not recognizing him, he went back to playing. He did well that night, and was allowed to skip the last few minutes of penalty laps for those that hadn't pulled their weight. He was in and out of the locker room in good time. His buddies met him in the parking lot, having been watching practice, and they piled into the Charger. Just before Doug started the car, he saw the same tall, burly man that had been out by the field, now standing by a truck that looked ready to accommodate ten of the biggest pro-wrestlers in the country. 

 

"What the fuck?"

 

"What?"

 

Ignoring his buddy, Doug got out of his car and turned to face the mystery man, but by the time he did that, the guy was getting into his truck. Frowning, he watched the monster truck drive out of the lot, and then angled himself behind the wheel again. "Freak," he mumbled.

 

By the time he got home, he could smell that the housekeeper, Marta, was in the middle of making something gourmet and utterly fantastic. Not that he really cared. She always made something out of this world, but he was used to it. Inside the doorway, he dropped his things by the stairs, leaving them for Marta to take to his room. 

 

"Ma!" he called. "I'm home."

 

She called to him from somewhere nearby and then met him in the living room, leaning in to give his cheek a kiss. "Hello, Dougie, sweetheart," she smiled. "How was your day today?"

 

He plopped himself down upon the sofa, reaching into the candy dish that sat atop the coffee table. "Un-fucking-believable," he said, devoid of any real emotion.

 

"Sweetie," she frowned, sitting down beside him on the sofa. "I wish you wouldn't speak so harshly."

 

"Sorry, Ma." Again, no emotion in his voice. He picked up the TV remote and flipped to the ESPN channel. "I'm going to go out later."

 

"Dougie, it's a school night," she gently reminded him.

 

"Yeah, so?"

 

"So, what about your homework?"

 

"I did it," he said. "I had two study halls today."

 

"Alright," she agreed. "If you think that's best." She was distracted when the phone rang. "Marta, could you get that?"

 

The phone rang only a couple more times before Marta answered it. But while she was answering the phone, the doorbell rang. Doug looked over to his mother, seeing that she wasn't going to get up. " _Ma_."

 

"Oh, sorry, darling," she apologized. "You're wrapped up in your sports. I'll get the door." She excused herself as she stepped in front of him and headed to the front hall, pulling hard to open the heavy mahogany door. "Yes?"

 

Doug glanced over to the front foyer, his heart stopping for a moment when he saw the same big guy from the football field, now standing in the doorway. "Shit."

 

"I'm the insurance guy," the man said.

 

Mrs Freeman cocked her head to the side and narrowed her eyes at the man. "Insurance man?" she repeated. "Really? You don't look like an insurance man."

 

Doug pushed in between her and the door. "I got it, Ma," he said.

 

Marta arrived, turning the corner and handing the phone to Doug's mother. "For you, Mrs Freeman," she said quickly, and then left again. 

 

Distracted again, she headed off into the living room again, talking on the phone. "Hello? Yes, this is she."

 

Doug pushed the big guy backwards onto the porch and closed the door behind them. "Who the fuck are you?"

 

"Rock."

 

He blinked, confused at the man's presence. "Okay, _Rock_ ," he said gruffly. "What do you want?"

 

"I'm the insurance guy."

 

"Yeah, I got that," he nodded. "What does that mean?"

 

In a split second, Rock curled one meaty hand into a fist and swung at Doug's abdomen. The wind was instantly knocked out of Doug's lungs as he doubled over in pain. He grunted and tried to breathe in, but it hurt too much. Instead, he had to take smaller, more gasping breaths. Rock pulled Doug back up to stand straight, pushing him back against the house. "Means I'm here to make sure you know that Ackles has good insurance."

 

Doug's temper flared. He gritted his teeth, nostrils flaring wide as he took deep breaths. "I get it," he said haltingly through the pain. "I'm not an idiot, okay?"

 

"I don't know," Rock said, seeming unconvinced. "You don't look so bright to me."

 

"And you do?"

 

That remark earned Doug another punch to the gut, making him cough and lose his breath again. He grunted painfully when Rock raked his fingers through Doug's hair, pulling him back up. "Get this straight, little man," he snarled. "Ackles is untouchable. He so much as has a hair out of place, and you'll get a visit from me. And maybe I'll bring Necro along. He likes 'em bloody and with a little fight left in 'em."

 

"Jesus Christ," Doug tried to breathe. "I _get_ it, man. I try anything, and I'm toast."

 

"Yeah," Rock grinned in his face. "And Necro might be the kind to butter you up and take a good bite or two."

 

Doug made a disgusted sound as Rock laughed. He was released, and slid down to the porch floor. Rock took his leave, the monster truck roaring loudly as he drove away. Doug's stomach throbbed with pain, bile coating the back of his throat. He stayed where he was for a few more minutes, trying to compose himself. He couldn't let his mother find out what had just transpired there. Taking several deep breaths, he combed his fingers through his hair and headed back inside the house.

 

"Dougie?"

 

"Yeah, Ma."

 

"Are you alright?"

 

His eyes were bloodshot and he felt like he was going to be sick, but he nodded to her anyway. "Yeah," he agreed. "I'm going to go upstairs. I need to lie down for a while."

 

"Hold on," she said, her voice having a little more authority this time. "That was Mister Cameron that just called. He wants to talk to your father and me. He said you _beat up_ a boy at school?"

 

Doug's eyes drifted closed and he sighed.

 

_Fuck_.

 

 

 

 

Since Sunday, usually the day he finished his homework, had pretty much been shot, thanks to his drunken stupidity, Jensen took the rest of Monday to finish what he'd not the previous day. He'd finally awoken around three in the afternoon with a splitting headache and a sick stomach. Surprisingly though, that was a step up. He found a sweat-beaded McDonald's cup of soda pop and a large carton of fries, both standing atop the nightstand beside the bed. He smiled softly and reached for both, regardless of the fact that his stomach protested. As he ate, he wondered in what book Jared had read the remedy. He'd like to kiss the author.

 

After eating and drinking all he could, his stomach was better, but not perfect. He decided that a shower was in order, and then cracked open the books. Jared was gone when he'd awoken, but he finally returned around five, carrying a Kentucky Fried Chicken bucket with him. "I got dinner, beautiful," he announced. 

 

Jensen's stomach turned when he saw the chicken. "Thanks," he said. "I think I'm good for now."

 

"Feeling pretty bad still?"

 

He shook his head. "No, not too bad, surprisingly. Way better than this morning."

 

Sternly, Jared wagged a finger at him. "Don't ever mix your liquors," he warned.

 

"Thanks," Jensen chuckled. "I'll remember that."

 

Jared ate in the house, thankfully, and by the time he was done, Jensen had finished up his work. The door to the garage opened and closed, just as Jensen closed his History book. "I know, I know," he said. "I'm done so you can have your dirty little way with me."

 

"All these years, and you're _still_ treating me like your love-slave."

 

It wasn't Jared's voice. Snapping his head around, Jensen saw Chris standing in the doorway, smiling brightly. "Shit, Chris," he breathed, setting a hand to his heart. "I'm sorry!"

 

"Don't be," he shrugged, moving down the stairs and into the garage. "I love being objectified."

 

Jensen stood and moved closer to him. Chris was the first to open his arms and pull Jensen into a hearty hug, and Jensen couldn't help but lean into it more than he probably should have. "I thought you were mad at me," he said, words muffled against Chris's shoulder.

 

Chris pulled him back and smacked Jensen's shoulder - hard. Realizing that Jensen could have had a bruise there, he rubbed away the pain he caused. "When was the last time I was mad at you?" he asked. "What happened wasn't your fault."

 

"Jeff tried to get Mister Cameron to back down a little, but he wouldn't."

 

Chris shook his head. "Don't worry about it, Jen."

 

"You didn't _call_."

 

He shrugged. "My parents fucking flipped out, man," he said. He moved over to the sofa and sat down on the arm of it. "I've just now gotten out of house arrest."

 

"Did you get the whole nine yards, chores and no TV?"

 

"Chores, no TV, no phone, no Dani, no you," he nodded. "I explained what happened, but they were sure there had to be more to it, because of the punishment I got, versus what fucking Freeman got."

 

"He's actually been civil to me," Jensen said. 

 

"Get out."

 

"I know, it scares me too."

 

Chris chuckled. It was silent for a moment as he eyed Jensen. "What else?"

 

Hands in his pockets, Jensen shrugged. "What?"

 

"There's something else wrong."

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head. "No, there's not."

 

"Jen, I've known you for too long. What's wrong?"

 

His smile quickly vanished. He reached up and massaged the back of his own neck, a sigh heaving from him. "Dad," he said, and then cleared his throat. He straightened and looked at his best friend. "Alan decided that he doesn't want to know me anymore."

 

Chris's shoulders fell slightly. "Damn, Jen," he frowned. "I'm sorry."

 

"Yeah, you know, don't worry about it," he said, waving it away. 

 

"No, it's bullshit," Chris argued. "He's so damn judgmental. Someone needs to kick his ass."

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head. "Yeah, right."

 

Sighing, Chris stood from the arm of the sofa. "Alright, look," he said. "I gotta jet. I still gotta get over and see Dani so she doesn't think I've been avoiding her, too. She'll need a little more convincing than you did, I think."

 

"Convincing of the French kind?"

 

Chris nodded, flicking Jensen's forehead with his fingers. "You're a quick study," he teased. He opened his arms and pulled Jensen into one more hug. 

 

Jensen loved that he felt Chris's hand at the back of his head, holding him there in the embrace for a while. 

 

"I'll see you at school tomorrow, Queenda," he joked, backing out of the hug.

 

The jokes didn't hurt coming from Chris, because they were said with love and years of friendship. "Original," he nodded. "Get lost."

 

As Chris left, Jared stepped through the doorway. They shared some sort of handshake-fist punch that Jensen still didn't get, and Chris let himself out of the front door. Jared didn't worry about locking up; the door handle lock was enough for now. He'd go in and lock up properly later. He toed off his boots just inside the garage doorway. "Jeff called," he said to Jensen as he set the boots aside. In his stocking feet, he moved over to the sofa. "Said him and Stevie had some 'serious talking' to do again, so he might just stay there tonight."

 

"I hope everything's okay."

 

Jared shrugged as he stretched out on the sofa. "He probably just wants to get laid," he said. "He told me to tell you to behave for once though."

 

"Yeah," Jensen said, standing from his chair. "Because I'm the problem child."

 

"You've fucking corrupted me." He chuckled and watched as Jensen headed toward the sofa. He opened his legs, setting one of them along the back of the couch. "Couple hours of TV?" he offered.

 

Jensen crawled down on the sofa, settling himself between Jared's legs and resting his head against the man's stomach. Jared's leg dropped from the back of the sofa, curling around him.

 

Regardless of how much he had already slept, by ten o'clock, Jensen found himself drifting off to sleep, warm and comfortable, tangled up in Jared. He awoke to the feel of Jared rubbing at his back. He found that, at some point, the man had wriggled out from underneath him and was now standing over him. 

 

"Come on," Jared encouraged. "Let's go to bed."

 

Jensen protested any movement, but didn't have a choice. Jared pushed him towards the ladder and up to the loft. Standing beside the bed, Jared slipped his fingers underneath the hem of Jensen's black shirt. "Take this off," he said softly. Jensen raised his arms, the only help Jared was going to get at that moment, and let the man pull the shirt off. It was tossed to the floor, quickly followed by Jared's red tee. Jensen looked up to find Jared already looking at him. Still a little sleepy, he reached out and touched Jared's face.

 

Jared took Jensen's hand away from his face. Keeping hold of his wrist, he bent his head down and pressed a kiss to the inside of Jensen's elbow. Jensen watched him, curious, and then felt his eyes drift closed when Jared’s tongue tasted the salt on his skin. Jared turned the wet kisses into suckling, pulling the skin up into his mouth just slightly, tongue working over the soft flesh. Jensen hadn't realized that the inside of his elbow was an erogenous zone, but was suddenly very thankful that Jared had known. The sensation made a soft gasp escape him. 

 

Letting Jensen's arm free, Jared looked at him again, He reached over and unfastened the young man's jeans, pushing down the zipper and forcing his hands inside, around to the back. His hands conformed to the shape of Jensen's backside, squeezing the muscle gently. He said nothing to him, pushing the jeans and boxer briefs down. Jensen let Jared undress him, adoring how Jared took his time, brushing his hands over each inch of newly exposed skin.

 

Maybe it was because Jensen was still a little tired, or maybe because he wasn't feeling well, but whatever the case, Jared pushed him down to the bed and let him relax while he finished undressing himself. He crawled atop Jensen, eyes predatory as he leaned down and kissed him. 

 

Jensen's chest expanded as he tried to breathe amidst the kiss. His hands skated up Jared's body, to his face, where he felt the man's jaw move underneath his hand.

 

Easing back, Jared stared down at him, dark hazel searching green. "There're so many things I'd like to do to you," he said softly.

 

Jensen returned his gaze, long lashes looking delicate in the low light of the room. "So, why don't you?"

 

Smiling, Jared reached down between them and wrapped his hand around Jensen, stroking him softly, shallowly, just enough to send a slight static through him. "What do you want to do?"

 

Jensen's eyes drifted closed for a moment, lids heavy not from sleep this time, but from pleasure. "What we did in the hotel room," he said.

 

Jared lowered himself down to one elbow, stroking somewhat harder than before, keeping Jensen's mind fuzzy with the constantly growing static. He leaned in and set his lips against Jensen's mouth, speaking against him. "Tell me what you want."

 

Doing his best to keep his breathing calm and even, Jensen closed his eyes as he breathed in Jared's exhalations. He wasn't good at talking like this, and he wished Jared wouldn't keep trying. Still, he felt the need to respond. "I want...I want you."

 

"What do you want from me?" Jared's voice was just a whisper, his lips grazing Jensen's, his tongue sneaking out now and then for a wet kiss.

 

Jensen tried to think of how to phrase his needs. He swallowed hard. His hands were rested at Jared's sides, fingers clutching at and dimpling the soft flesh there. "I want..." He hadn't found the right words yet, and paused. Jared continued touching him, taking the flat of his thumb and swiping it over the head of Jensen's cock. The movement spread the slightest hint of wetness around the head, sending his nerve endings crying out. Jensen gasped, mouth open against Jared's, and groaned. "I want to watch you." Jared repeated the movement, adding in a stronger flick of his wrist and Jensen gasped once more. "Oh, God," he breathed. He looked up into Jared's eyes, more determination there this time. "I want to watch you come."

 

Pleased with the words that had finally worked their way out of Jensen's mouth, Jared smiled and kissed him, harder than before. He got up, not breaking the kiss until he absolutely had to, before leaning over to the shelves beside the bed. He returned with a small bottle of lube, and generously poured some into the palm of his hand. He slicked down Jensen's skin, watching the man grit his teeth against the sensations Jared was sending rippling through his body. He did the same thing to himself, but didn't have enough of the lube left. He poured what he could into Jensen's hand and helped him spread the slick substance. 

 

Jensen watched Jared lean back against the mattress and followed him, hovering over Jared in a breathy, hungry kiss. Jared's hands guided him closer, let go for just a moment to reach down and guide their slick cocks up against each other. The first touch had Jensen breaking away from the kiss to look down at what he was doing. He watched his own hips thrust against Jared's and groaned. 

 

Jared let go and set his hands up over his head, palms up. "Hold me down," he told him.

 

Jensen looked at his hands, then interlocked their fingers, pinning Jared down to the mattress. He thrust his hips again, the warm wetness between them making his head spin, his heart pound with need. He quickly found a rhythm that had him breathing heavier, had Jared grunting with each stroke. Jared's grip on his hands grew tighter and tighter, the tips of his fingers whitening as he held on. 

 

Jensen tipped his head back for a moment, his eyes closed, relishing the feel of the slippery warmth, the perfect friction building between them. He was so thankful Jared had stumbled into his life - or was it vice versa? - so glad that it was Jared teaching him not only these things, but how to be strong, self-assured. Where would he be without him? The idea of that scared him more than he wanted to admit.

 

Leaning down, Jensen kissed Jared the way he'd learned sent Jared reeling. He knew it was working, when he heard a soft whimper escape the back of Jared's throat. He realized Jared was at his mercy, and it made him smile. He scraped his teeth along the other man's ear, down his neck and then back up along his jaw, kissing him again, his tongue hungrily seeking out Jared's. By the time he backed away to look down, he saw a thin film of sweat had gathered upon Jared's skin, shining at the hollow of his throat. For some reason, that simple sight made Jensen's cock twitch out of need. He was responsible for that sweat, and it sent a spark through him. 

 

He wanted to lean down, bury his face at Jared's neck to muffle his cries as he came, but he didn't. Instead, he gazed down into Jared's eyes, finding him already watching him. He thought for sure he would come first, but Jared suddenly arched against him, his grip tightening even more, legs curling around Jensen's body. Jensen watched as Jared's eyes closed, his mouth falling open as he moaned, and warmth spilled between them. 

 

Jensen leaned down and swallowed what was left of Jared's cries. He kept up with his rhythm, his hips working harder than before. It was only a moment or two later that he came, his own moans swallowed this time, his breath stolen. Their skin was even slicker than before and it made chills spread along Jensen's skin, made him shudder violently against Jared's body.

 

Grunting one last time, Jensen collapsed. The grip on Jared's hands went slack and he buried his face at the crook of Jared's neck and shoulder. He felt Jared wrap both his legs around Jensen again, as well as both arms, and squeeze tightly. Jensen breathed out and felt his spine crack slightly, vertebrae re-aligning. He chuckled and then rolled onto his own side of the bed. Jared leaned out of bed and did some sort of flailing fish movement, returning with the red tee he'd thrown to the floor earlier. He wiped off his belly and lower before handing the shirt over to Jensen and letting him do the same.

 

"You don't have any idea how sexy you were just now, do you?"

 

Jensen looked at him, surprised. "What'd I do?"

 

"The way you told me what you wanted," Jared explained. "That had me ready to come in an instant."

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head, tossing the shirt back onto the floor. "I wish I could be better at it."

 

Jared leaned over, kissed him goodnight. "You were perfect."


	31. Chapter twenty-nine

  
Author's notes: **Two chapters today!**  


* * *

Jensen woke to Jared shaking his shoulder. It was still dark, only the dim light of the moon shining in through the window of the upper storey, and he had to blink a few times to get his eyes to adjust. 

 

"What's going on?"

 

"I need my arm back," Jared told him, pushing gently at him until he moved. Jensen rolled onto his back, laughter rumbling in his chest as Jared rubbed the arm which had been trapped under his body.

 

"Sorry, man. Was I that fast asleep?"

 

"Yeah, for a change. I gotta take a piss. Keep the bed warm."

 

"Mm, sure.." Jensen could feel himself dozing off again already as Jared climbed down the ladder, complaining at the cold all the way down. He heard the door to the house open, and then he fell asleep. It was only a few minutes later when Jared's voice broke into his sleep again and he sat up, grumbling and rubbing at his eyes.

 

"Jen, come look at this."

 

"Are you kidding me? You want me to get out of bed _now_?"

 

"Come on. Promise it's worth it."

 

Jensen knew he wouldn't win the argument so he hauled himself out of bed and headed down the ladder, already shivering by the time he reached the bottom. "You better warm me up after this." Jared just grinned and took him by the shoulders, shoving him towards the door to the house. When he saw inside the kitchen he couldn't help but laugh. "Oh, _jesus_. Jeff's gonna-"

 

"No he ain't. He's had that girl three days and he adores her more than he does you."

 

"Liar. He _loves_ me."

 

Jared poked him in the side, tickling his ribs. "You're thinking of someone else, but whatever. Think we should clean it up?"

 

Jensen stepped into the kitchen, looking at the dry dog food that was scattered all across the floor of it. The bag had been tipped over, part of it chewed away. "At least she didn't chew through anything important." He crouched down and flicked a couple of the small biscuits towards a chair leg. The noise made Shelby come running from wherever she'd been hiding from them. Jensen caught her and stood, chuckling as she licked at his face. "God, dog tongue. So not what I wanted, Shel." He held her while Jared quickly swept up as much of the food as possible. He righted the bag and took it into the garage so that Shelby wouldn't be able to get into it again.

 

"Okay, girl," he said, when he was done. "Back to bed."

 

Smiling, Jensen lifted an eyebrow at him. "You talking to me or the puppy?"

 

"You, asshole. Come on."

 

"Dick," Jensen muttered, but put Shelby on the floor and quickly followed Jared out of the kitchen. They shut the puppy inside and went back to bed. She would likely wander round the kitchen for a while and then settle in her bed. She'd been pretty good since they'd got her. Stevie had taken Jensen and Jared to look at the puppies last week and together they'd chosen one which Jared said looked a lot like the dog Jeffrey used to have. They'd picked her up three days ago and Jeffrey had fallen in love as soon as the pair had met. 

 

It was one of several big things that had happened over the first few weeks of December. Another was that Stevie had, almost officially, moved in with Jeff. She'd told the boys about her decision regarding the school and Jared had found himself liking her more every time he spoke to her. She showed an interest in his bikes, which was definitely in her favor, and when she told him she knew somebody who would pay for his mechanic services he liked her even more. He'd been working on the guy's Honda over the last few days and would be paid enough to cover some kind of Christmas gift for Jensen and Jeff.

 

Doug had been extremely quiet at school of late. He hadn't come near Jensen and there had been rumors that his parents had removed a lot of his privileges at home. His friends seemed to keep a distance from Jensen too, and he couldn't help but wonder if it was because of what Jared had done or something else. He didn't much care, and neither did Chris. The more Doug left them alone, the more other people seemed inclined to talk to them. Jensen didn't make too much effort to talk back, though. He'd been thinking too much about his father and his family in general to want to socialize.

 

His mom had invited both him and Jared to dinner the following day. It was the first day Jensen had off school for the Christmas holidays and his father had gone on a trip to Chicago, to meet with some law firm there and exchange information on a case that was being transferred to his office. Jensen knew it was probably an excuse to Alan to get out of the house, away from a wife he barely spoke to any more. He certainly wasn't going to worry about it. The longer that had passed since Alan had disowned him, the more Jensen began to resent him. And he hated himself for that.

 

Under the blankets, Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen and told him to stop thinking and go back to sleep.

 

"Can't help it. You're the one that made me get out of bed and freeze my goddamn ass off."

 

"You want me to warm your ass up?"

 

"I want you to let me go back to sleep." Jensen turned in his arms, facing Jared and kissing him. "Could be a long day tomorrow."

 

"Oh, yeah. Dinner with Mom."

 

"We don't have to stay too long. We can eat and leave. She won't mind, so long as she gets to see me."

 

Jared leaned forward, brushing his lips against Jensen's once more. "You should spend time with your family. Especially at Christmas. It's okay, I'll cope."

 

"Just don't jump me before we even get in the door again and we'll be fine."

 

 

 

 

It was late in the morning when the pair of them got up, Jensen enjoying not having to wake up to an alarm and get ready for school. Jeffrey and Stevie were already out with the puppy so Jensen wanted to make the most of an empty house. He followed Jared up to the bathroom and they shaved at the same time, sharing a sink full of water and staring each other down in the mirror. Jensen got done first, and set the shower going, nice and warm. Jared joined him as he was halfway through washing his hair and, with the suds running down his face making him keep his eyes closed, Jensen didn't see his hands coming up. He jumped, muttering in surprise as Jared's hands fell against his chest. The start turned into a moan of pleasure, though, as deft fingers began toying with his nipples.

 

Jared still hadn't gotten Jensen to get rings yet, but the idea was becoming more appealing with every passing day. The ink, at least, was something that Jensen no longer worried about. His tattoos had spread over the past couple of weeks and they both had new additions planned for Christmas. Jared mapped them now with soapy hands, not stopping when Jensen dipped his head under the spray to wash off his shampoo.

 

When he'd rinsed off, he lifted his head again and quickly kissed Jared's chin. "Okay, you can stop that now. I gotta get ready and I'd rather do it without a hard-on."

 

"A hard-on was kind of the point," Jared insisted, gripping Jensen's shoulders and holding him against the tile wall. He looked down between them, grinning, but Jensen managed to push him back.

 

"Maybe for you, but I'd rather not be any later than we already will be to Mom's. I promise the wait'll be worth it by tonight."

 

"If I wait that long," Jared told him. He let him go, smacking his ass as he went. It made Jensen look back at him, cheeks flushed, and call him an asshole.

 

He dried off on the landing, and headed down to the garage with the towel wrapped round his waist. It was still chilly out there in spite of the heater that Jared had finally set up and Jensen shivered as he hurried to his set of drawers, eager to get dressed and get warm. He chose a short sleeved black shirt and ripped black jeans that hadn't actually been made that way by a designer. He wanted his tattoos to be visible, since his mom hadn't seen them yet, and she had told him not to bother dressing up.

 

He was glad for that; at least it meant he didn't have the added worry of trying to force Jared into a suit. He pulled on his leather jacket and boots as Jared returned from his shower. They took one look at each other and, despite Jensen's earlier protests, promptly delayed their leaving by another half hour.

 

 

 

 

Jared hadn't even gotten the bike parked up before Kenzie was running out to hug her big brother. She waited only until Jensen had both feet off the bike and then threw her arms around him happily. He squeezed her back tightly and then she let go and gave Jared a hug that was just as firm. He looked at Jensen, slightly bemused, but hugged back.

 

"Hey, sis. Uh, you can put him down if you want..."

 

Kenzie flushed red, stepping away slightly. Before she could say sorry, Jensen cut in with his own apology about their being late.

 

"It's okay. Mom's got everything ready and nearly on the table. Josh's girlfriend is here too, so he probably won't be around after dinner."

 

Jensen nodded. He'd figured as much.

 

"Did you guys bring presents?"

 

Jared snorted. "The hell we did. You can wait till Christmas day like everyone else, girl, got it?"

 

Kenzie looked at him, raised an eyebrow, then turned back to her brother and leaned in to whisper. "I think your boyfriend just said something, but I didn't really-"

 

"You heard him," Jensen cut in, laughing at her expression. "I promise we'll bring you presents over before Christmas. But not today."

 

"You know, as an older brother? You really suck." With that, Kenzie turned and headed back into the house, leaving Jensen and Jared no choice but to follow. 

 

Josh was in the kitchen with Cathy and his mom, helping her by carving up the meat. He looked around when Jensen and Jared came in, though he didn't say a word as Donna wiped her hands off on her apron and drew both of the boys into her arms in turn. She looked only slightly less tired than the last time Jensen had seen her and he felt guilt gnawing at his stomach; he knew that it was largely his fault. Jensen's mom stepped back when she finally let him go, and she looked at him as she brought a hand up to cup his cheek.

 

"Are you doing okay, sweetheart?"

 

"Doing great, mom," he answered, glad he could say that without feeling like it was a lie.

 

"Good," she told him, patting the side of his face and then letting her hand drop. "I'm glad to hear it." She stepped aside as Cathy came over and gave Jensen a hug too. Evidently Josh's frostiness towards his brother hadn't affected her feelings, and he was thankful to her for that.

 

He waited until she let him go and then said his brother's name, holding out his hand. Jared kept quiet, said nothing when Donna had to nudge her other son to make him put down the carving knife and shake his brother's hand. Josh did as he was urged, though he couldn't seem to look Jensen in the eyes while he did it and Donna looked upset on his behalf. She masked it with a smile, though, clapping her hands together and telling them to sit down.

 

"This all looks great, Mrs Ackles," Jared said, finally breaking his silence with her as he removed his leather jacket and folded it neatly over the back of his chair. Jensen felt his cheeks heat slightly when he noticed both his sister _and_ Cathy checking out Jared's ink-covered arms, but he managed not to react. He was slightly sure there'd be enough noise when he took his own jacket off.

 

There wasn't, not at first. His sister and brother both gaped at him in silence, and he shifted under their scrutiny, smiling uncomfortably. His mother's gaze travelled over each arm in turn, taking in the tattoos, and then she met his eyes. 

 

"Well," she said, her voice disturbing the stillness in the kitchen. "You certainly like to surprise me, don't you?"

 

"I figured it was about time you knew," he answered. He felt awkward, stood there, and he crossed one arm over his chest and wrapped his hand around his side. "Jared kind of-"

 

"I'll bet he did," Josh muttered, interrupting. Donna looked round sharply, frowning at him.

 

"He explained why people get them," Jensen continued. "And it just felt _right_ , that's all."

 

"Plus they're pretty hot," Jared added, smirking behind him. Kenzie snickered at that, and it seemed to help break the tension a bit more. Donna was smiling again at least.

 

"I'm not angry, Jensen," she said. "Just shocked. I keep forgetting that you're an adult, I suppose."

 

"I have to grow up sometime, mom," he told her, his voice soft.

 

"I know, sweetheart. But you speak to any mom and they'll all tell you that we never want our kids to grow up."

 

"But that'd mean that Kenzie would be an annoying teenager forever and that's just not-" He cut off as his sister reached out and whacked his arm for him. "Hey!"

 

"That's for calling me annoying," Kenzie said. "And that," she hit him again, more gently, "is for not bringing presents."

 

Donna took her daughter by the shoulder, pulling her back. "Okay, okay. Let's leave the family fights until after dinner, right? C'mon. Sit down, everyone, before the food gets cold!"

 

 

 

Dinner, Jensen thought, was way more awkward than it ought to have been. His sister, mother and Cathy were fine, but Josh stayed moody and barely spoke. Jared was quieter too, joking only now and again, and he was fidgety. Jensen felt like it was an effort to sit there and not touch Jared himself, so he could only hope that the reason for the other man's behavior was the same one. He suspected, though, that it was Josh's odd reaction to him that was making him feel that way.

 

"So what is it you normally do at Christmas, Jared?" Donna asked, halfway through dessert. She was making an effort to include him, but her question seemed to catch him off-guard and he dropped what was on his spoon as he hesitated before answering.

 

"Uh. I.. I have this tradition for Christmas morning that I'm gonna show Jen this year. Just something I used to do when I was a kid and I kind of carried on. And I visit Mom. And, uh, Jeff usually buys in dinner 'cause, well, he ain't as good a cook as you are.."

 

Donna laughed at that, shaking her head. "I'm sure he can't be all that bad?"

 

"He's getting better. Stevie... Think she's taught him a few things now. Says she wants to be in charge of Christmas dinner, though, which is fine."

 

"What about Christmas Eve? Bet you don't have to go to church, right?" Kenzie asked, her eyes going wide and mock-innocent when her mother shot her a look.

 

"Well, not usually. Christmas Eve is..." He trailed off, grinned over at Jensen. "I wouldn't want to spoil the surprise. Although New Year's Eve there's this big party that Jeff's organized. Fancy dress."

 

"Fancy dress?" Jensen echoed. "You didn't say fancy dress when you told me about it before."

 

Jared shrugged. "Forgot."

 

Kenzie watched the exchange between them, glowing with excitement. "I'll help you out with a costume," she offered, and Jensen couldn't say no.

 

 

 

 

When they'd done cleaning the table and putting the dishes away, Josh excused himself and Cathy and they both left. Jensen didn't know if he just wanted to be away from his brother and from Jared, but he didn't ask. He didn't want to start any arguments, not when everything else was going so well. He and Jared sat with his mom and Kenzie for a while, chatting about all the things that Jensen had missed. Carefully avoiding any mention of Alan.

 

Kenzie waited until Donna left the room to get them all a drink and told Jensen that she wasn't missing their father at all.

 

"That's not a real nice thing to say," Jensen told her, frowning.

 

"Whenever he's here all he and mom do is either fight or ignore each other. I don't know which is worse, really. Josh might ask Cathy to marry him at Christmas, just so they can get a house together and he can move out too. He'll probably chicken out, though. That's why he's pissed at you, I think. Cause you don't have to be here listening to it and for some reason he thinks-"

 

"I can tell just fine what he thinks."

 

Kenzie's lip curled. "Yeah. He's not exactly subtle. But he also doesn't want you to know that he blames Dad for this and not you. I don't know why he's taking it out on you."

 

"I don't care who he blames. He's still my brother."

 

Donna returned then and they each had a drink, Jared downing his quietly.

 

"It's so good to see you both, you know," said Jensen's mother, after a while of comfortable silence. "As far as I'm concerned, Jared, you're always welcome here."

 

"Thanks, Mrs A. Jeff said the same about you."

 

"Well, that's good to hear, since I'll be dropping off your gifts on Christmas Eve."

 

"Mom, you don't-"

 

She held up a hand, silencing her son. "Yes, I do. I've always treated my son at Christmas; I won't stop now. And if your father can buy Josh's girlfriend some stupid gift from the two of us, then I can surely spoil my son's boyfriend too. Now, I hope you'll excuse me. It's been a tiring week and I think I could use a rest."

 

"Of course, mom. Hey, has anything been moved from my room?"

 

"No, nothing. I left everything in there that you didn't take with you."

 

"Okay. I think I'll take Jared up there and show him something I forgot to pick up."

 

Donna's mouth twitched like she wanted to smile knowingly, but didn't. "It's your room, dear," was all she said, before heading for the door.

 

Kenzie was all smiles as soon as she was on the stairs. "Are you two going up there to make out?"

 

Jensen flushed red at his sister's obnoxious question and Jared just laughed at her. "Why don't you go play some Nintendo and mind your own business?" He asked, only laughing harder when she huffed at him. "He's only gonna show me his old report cards. Maybe we'll take a nap too."

 

"Just keep your clothes on," she told him, hands on her hips. "Mom's the one who's got to strip that bed afterward and-"

 

"Kenzie," Jensen interrupted. "Shut the hell up."

 

His sister rolled her eyes at him, but did leave him alone after that and wandered through to the den to watch a movie.

 

Jensen led Jared up to his room and closed the door behind them, breathed a sigh of relief. 

 

"Thank God," Jared said, pulling Jensen to him and kissing him firmly. "Been trying to keep my hands off you all through dinner and it's been fucking torture."

 

"Thought you were kind of quiet," Jensen answered.

 

"Does your door lock?"

 

Jensen turned the latch in answer and crossed the room to draw the white blinds closed.

 

"And here I thought you really were gonna show me your old report cards."

 

"Ha ha. I can if you want."

 

"You got a stereo in here?"

 

Jensen shrugged, brow furrowed at the sudden change in subject. "Yeah. Mom said nothing's been moved, so.." He opened up a cabinet set into an alcove opposite the bed and Jared whistled when he saw the flatscreen TV and stereo system that it housed.

 

"And you left all this to come live with me? I'm flattered."

 

"You should be. If I didn't love you so much you're damn right I'd still be here, living it up-"

 

"Partying every night, I bet." He ignored Jensen poking his tongue out and joined him in front of the stereo, digging a CD from his shirt pocket and slipping it into the player. Making sure the volume was loud enough to disguise any noise they might make, but not so loud that it would wake Jensen's mom down the hall, Jared set the music going. Rob Zombie's Feel So Numb soon filled the room and Jensen looked over at him in disbelief.

 

"Seriously? This is your makeout music?"

 

"Kind of... It's not all Zombie, okay?"

 

Jensen shot him a doubtful look and Jared just licked his lips and reached out both arms to loop around the younger man's neck. He closed the distance between them and kissed Jensen's jaw, nothing more than a flash of contact, wet on dry.

 

"And it's not exactly makeout music..."


	32. Chapter thirty

  
Author's notes: **Three chapters today folks! =)**  
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* * *

Jensen let himself be pushed down onto his mattress, body denting and creasing against pristine white. Jared followed him down, all warmth and hungry, open-mouthed kisses. He settled his weight against Jensen; between his legs and against his chest. There was a slight shiver when he drew back and caught his breath, and Jensen reached up with one hand and curled it to his face. He had a question that he wanted to ask, but he kind of already knew the answer. He already knew what was going to happen.

 

He bit it down, parting his lips and running his tongue along them, waiting for Jared to kiss him again. He touched him instead. His fingers slid between the buttons of Jensen's shirt, skimming over his skin, and then he eased a couple of buttons from their holes. Jensen's heart was pounding, and not only because of the five small points of pressure against his belly. He couldn't see Jared's eyes; just a mess of dark hair hanging down as Jared watched what he was doing. He was drawing patterns on Jensen's skin, his fingers moving slow and lazy.

 

Tangled on the bed, a contrast to the music that surrounded them, Jensen felt like he and Jared had been turned down. That they were being too quiet because of what was to come. It didn't make him feel uncomfortable, though. How could it, with Jared's hands smoothing him down and warming out the creases? 

 

His shirt was completely open now and Jared had ducked his head down, mouthing against each of Jensen's nipples in turn. He wondered how much better that would feel with rings through them. He'd find out, he supposed. 

 

He groaned, then, loud and bitten off, as Jared tucked his hand between Jensen's legs and pushed it over the half-hard ridge of his cock. It was not a new feeling, except for the part where everything now was completely new. He thought he should say something, stop this happening in _this_ place, of all places, but he couldn't bring himself to speak. Jared had a promise to keep, and only a week left to keep it. It stood to reason that he would choose Jensen's bedroom in Jensen's family home to fulfil it. 

 

Jared stroked again, sending sparks of heat outward from where his hand touched. Jensen shifted, drawing one leg up and pressing one trembling knee to Jared's shoulder. He wished he could be all the way around him, that he could see the way their tattoos looked when they moved together this way. He settled for pulling Jared up again, into a kiss, and digging his fingertips into inked skin. He breathed out into Jared's mouth when the other man squeezed his dick through his jeans, forgetting to move for a few moments. He wondered if Jared would make him ask for it, _beg_ for it.

 

The way his nerves were being teased right now, he probably would have.

 

It didn't seem like Jared had any intention of making him speak, though, as his attention moved again. With his hand rubbing back and forth over the seam of denim at Jensen's thigh, Jared nudged Jensen's head to one side and scraped his mouth over the man's jaw. It made him tilt his head upward and he shivered as Jared's mouth closed gently over his Adam's apple. The music was fading out, along with any clarity in his mind, and a Metallica track took its place. It was kind of absurd, Jensen thought, yet perfect. Jared all over, really.

 

Jared's other hand slid around the back of Jensen's neck as he kissed him, and then he was pulling him up, shuffling backwards and forcing Jensen to sit up, until they were both knelt opposite one another, their bodies flush together. He looked at him then, through half-lidded eyes, like he was considering something. Jensen waited, silent, and didn't move when Jared came closer. His lips barely touched Jensen's face, ghosting over his skin like a promise. Jensen tried to move forward, to catch the offered kiss, but Jared just ducked away from him.

 

He smiled, shook his head. _Not yet_.

 

Frustrated, Jensen retaliated by pushing one hand down between them, his thumb plucking at Jared's belt buckle and then moving further down as he spread his whole hand to cup the bulge in Jared's jeans. They were each as hard as one another and Jensen tried to picture it, found his mouth filling with saliva as he thought about tasting it. There was a smirk on Jared's face when he looked again, a smug expression which Jensen wiped away with a twist of his wrist.

 

Jared bit his lip at that, looked down and then back up. This time he went for it, his kisses fierce, bruising. Jensen took it because he wanted it. Needed it. He'd let Jared do whatever the hell he wanted right now and, he thought, it looked like that was the plan all along. Jared's hands were at his waist then, working his belt open and pulling it free from the loops of his jeans. He unbuttoned Jensen's fly, but didn't pull his jeans open straight away. He just let them hang undone and skated his hands upwards over Jensen's stomach and up to his chest. 

 

His fingers curved around Jensen's neck, his thumb pushing up against his jawline. The pressure forced him to rock his head back and Jared leaned forward and kissed his throat again. His tongue jabbed out, soft and quick, wetting Jensen's skin. A low moan sounded between them and Jensen wondered how he'd managed to make any sound at all. He'd forgotten where he was. Everything just felt right for this now.

 

With an effort, he lowered his head to look Jared in the eye again, making the other man stop his kisses and sit back a few inches. He didn't need to be asked. He let Jensen to it, his breathing becoming ragged when he ducked down and tongued against one silver ring. Jensen caught the metal hoop between his teeth and tugged carefully, watching Jared's skin stretch out. There was another moan, from Jared this time, and Jensen worked the ring in his mouth the way he knew would drive Jared absolutely crazy.

 

It was like working a charm. Jared shuddered in his arms, his eyes almost completely closed, and then his patience wore out completely. He pushed Jensen's shirt sleeves off over his shoulders and Jensen reached behind his back to help him get it off completely. Then Jared planted one hand firmly against his chest and forced him to lay down, following him down again. Their hard cocks rubbed together through two layers of cloth and Jensen gave in waiting. He shoved his hands inside his jeans and pushed them down over his thighs, urging Jared on with a look.

 

The message was received and understood. While he was by Jensen's feet, tugging his socks and jeans off together, Jared lingered. He smoothed his hand over the jut of bone below Jensen's ankle, his gaze moving up the younger man's body. Naked and, thankfully, unashamed, Jensen watched him looking. His teeth were clamped against his lower lip and he wanted to tell Jared how ticklish he felt right then. But he couldn't speak, _wouldn't_ speak, and so he just squirmed on the bed when Jared's fingers moved again over the top of his foot. 

 

His grip tightened and he urged Jensen to turn over, lay on his front. The position made him feel even more vulnerable than before, especially when he both heard and felt the movement of Jared's clothes coming off. He heard Jared rustling through his pockets and then the soft thud as the discarded jeans and shirt hit the floor. He turned his head and saw Jared putting something on top of his nightstand, then he was distracted completely when the other man once again caught hold of his ankle and began dropping kisses onto his skin. 

 

Jared worked his way up and around the back of Jensen's calves, moving up until his breath fanned hot over Jensen's shoulder. He chuckled as Jensen shivered and then blew against his ear, making him do it again. So sexy and he probably still wouldn't believe it. 

 

He teased until Jensen grunted out a complaint, reminding him that there were other areas of his body that needed attention. Jared was only too happy to oblige him. He eased himself back down, moving his tongue against the shallow dip at the base of Jensen's spine as Metallica ended and Alice Cooper began. Jensen pushed down into the mattress like he was trying to fuck it the moment Jared's tongue slid further along his skin. Jared's hands helped him open up and he panted into the pillow, jaw working around nothing, when he felt the blunt pressure of it almost inside him. It felt like he was going to choke on his own breath and he lifted his head, gulping in air.

 

Jared didn't notice or didn't want to stop, because his tongue pushed deeper each time and Jensen felt like he had no strength left in his muscles to make him stop anyway. He didn't want him to, especially not when Jared's fingers were added into the mix. He knew what he was doing; he wasn't an idiot. He was getting Jensen as ready as he could be. The fact that it felt incredible was a bonus. He knew the real thing was going to hurt. He knew that, and he pushed back against Jared's tongue more desperately. He was almost aching to get it over with.

 

The move seemed to make Jared hesitate and he backed off, dropping a kiss on one side of Jensen's backside, and got up, kneeling, one leg either side of Jensen's body.

 

Next thing, Jared's hands were on Jensen's back and he started at the sudden heat of them. His hands were large, rough from being constantly cleaned of oil and grease, and they were now rubbing circles over Jensen's back. Jared pushed down hard, creasing Jensen's skin, working his muscles over. He felt fucked out already, and they'd barely started. He saw Jared reaching for something and turned his head to see him pick up the tube of KY that he'd put by the bed.

 

Jensen's stomach flipped at the sight of it; the weird feeling that had been coiling in his belly straightened out suddenly and he swallowed hard. Jared seemed to sense it and leaned down even as he was unscrewing the cap to kiss the tip of Jensen's ear. As distractions went it wasn't much, but it did the trick for the couple of seconds that he needed.

 

Jared coated his fingers thoroughly, not wanting to chance hurting Jensen, and then he reached down and inched one finger in. He made himself concentrate on just this. He didn't want to try and sugar-coat it with kisses and gentleness. He wanted Jensen to feel it, to experience every moment, so that he would lose the fear he still had of it. Jensen barely reacted to one finger, so Jared eased another into him and watched him tense up. His fingers were curled round, one hand fisted around the sheets while the other clawed into them like he was scrabbling to get away. He'd pulled himself a few inches and Jared used his free hand to grip Jensen's waist and move him back into position.

 

He got his arm around Jensen's chest, lifting him up. It would make it easier, though he couldn't expect Jensen to know that instinctively. Despite that, Jensen came willingly and allowed Jared to get him where he needed him. He could hear his breathing grow shallow and could feel the trembles beneath his skin, the way his heart was pounding viciously in his chest. He wanted to promise that it would be okay, that it would be easy, but he didn't know that it would. 

 

So he stayed quiet, letting Jensen go long enough to stroke his dick with one wet hand, getting it ready. Jensen didn't move at all. Didn't react when he heard Jared open up the condom, or as he listened to him grunting as he slid it over his cock. Jared used the KY liberally. He didn't care if he had to use the whole damn lot; he was determined to make this as easy as possible for the both of them. 

 

The first push still hurt. Jensen didn't need to tell him. He felt the change in him and the fact that he was so tight made it obvious. Jensen reached one arm back, though, his fingers gripping onto skin as soon as he came into contact with it. Jared let him hold on, ignoring the niggling pain of his nails digging in, and he gritted his teeth as he kept on pushing in.

 

To his credit, Jensen didn't make a sound. Jared had thought he would; he could still remember that afternoon in the motel, after all. But Jensen was too busy hanging on to Jared, forcing his own body to let this happen. As strange and as awful as it felt right now, he knew it couldn't last. Jared wouldn't want it so much if this was all there was to it, he was sure of it. He made himself push back and felt a quick surge of pleasure when he heard Jared's shocked half-laugh. _Yeah_ , he thought. _Me too_.

 

Jared had to be all the way in. Fuck, he _had_ to be. Jensen didn't think he could handle any more, until a second later when there was more and his eyes were shooting open so wide he felt blinded. He hadn't thought that he would feel this much and he definitely hadn't expected that after all the pain of getting here, there could be this. And yet Jared wasn't moving any more. Or he was just moving so slowly that Jensen wasn't registering it.

 

He lifted his head up as he pushed back against Jared again and there was a frustrated and desperate little giggle that didn't sound right at all, then Jared was pressed up against him all the way along. Hot and sweaty with the effort of holding back, his skin rubbed smoothly over Jensen's. There was no friction between them at all and Jensen's hand skidded off Jared's arm, thumping down on the bed. 

 

He was all the way in now, Jensen knew that from the white flashes in the corners of his vision, and every move he made caused the sparks in Jensen's head to flash brighter. It made him feel like someone was reaching into his stomach with one hand and clenching tightly around whatever it was in there that connected directly to his brain. At the same time, despite the pleasure, there was a constant background noise of pain and Jensen was torn between riding it out and making Jared stop.

 

Gnawing on his bottom lip, Jensen closed his eyes and concentrated on everything else.

 

Jared was dripping now, sweat spattering onto the back of Jensen's neck and rolling over his shoulders. Jensen knew then that he was holding back and he urged him on, forcing his muscles to contract and tightening around Jared's dick. It hurt, he thought, but shit, it was worth it. It made Jared let loose and the pleasure suddenly became stronger as pain took a backseat. It was a shock to his system and he almost reared back, almost dislodged their position. He stopped himself, though, and buried his face in the pillow, biting into the soft cotton as Jared fucked into him. 

 

His face felt hot, his body felt like it was on fire, but he didn't want to stop. He only stopped moving when Jared did, when Jared suddenly went still, breathing out hard against his nape, when Jared's dick twitched and jerked inside of him as he came. There was a warm pool of come under Jensen's body already and he moved, grimacing, waiting until Jared got up so he could roll over and away from it. Jared didn't move right away. He stayed where he was for about a minute before he had the strength to push himself up.

 

Jensen turned onto his back, watching Jared head for the en-suite. Jared left the door open so Jensen could see him taking the condom off and dropping it in the trashcan that was in there. So he could see him running the cold tap over his hands, splashing water onto his flushed red face. He watched him walk back to the bed, thinking all the while that he'd have to clean up and take some shit with him so his mom wouldn't find out, and then Jared was there, grinning down at him, all teeth and dimples and shining skin, and he forgot all about smuggling dirty sheets from home.

 

Def Leppard faded out into Boston as Jensen met Jared's eyes and thought about how right and how dangerous this all was. And honestly? He didn't want it any other way.


	33. Chapter thirty-one

Jared had teased Jensen about making a mess of the sheets, reminding him of how innocent he'd tried to act with his little sister.

 

"It's like she already knew that you'd come like a sixteen-year-old boy without even being touched," he murmured, his voice soft on Jensen's skin.

 

Jensen felt his cheeks flame, but felt the need to argue that Jared had been touching him the whole time, in case he'd forgotten. And also that he still was a teenager, only a few years off sixteen anyway, which made Jared laugh and pull him in for a brief kiss.

 

"Guess we'd better strip the bed, huh?"

 

"I guess." Between them they took the sheets off and then cleaned up and got dressed again. Jensen emptied out his bathroom trashcan into the larger one in the kitchen and Jared loaded the dirtied sheets and towels into the washer, switching it on. Kenzie came into the kitchen as he was doing so and gave him a knowing smile. Jensen shooed her out when she told him he was gross and heard her calling out to their mom as she went.

 

"I'll throttle that brat," he grumbled, but Jared pulled him back.

 

"She's just doing her job of being a little sister. They're meant to annoy the crap out of you."

 

"I guess."

 

Jared grinned, pulling Jensen firmly to him. He kissed him quietly for a few moments, giving up only when Kenzie whistled at them from the door.

 

"Yeah, yeah," Jensen said, pulling away, but not allowing Jared to let go of him. "Gonna kick your butt if you keep it up."

 

"Sure you are, Jensen."

 

"Kick your butt at Nintendo any day of the week."

 

Kenzie straightened. "You're on. Bet I beat the both of you."

 

They followed her into the den and Donna joined them a few minutes into their game, sitting beside her son. She ruffled his hair and laughed when he ducked away and told her to stop helping out the enemy.

 

None of them heard the car pulling up in the driveway.

 

None of them knew who it was until the front door slammed open and the voice of Alan shouted Jensen's name through the house. Jared simply looked up, but Donna paled and Jensen threw his controller to the floor and rose to his feet, as if expecting some kind of physical confrontation. He heard his father moving through the house and felt a lump rise in his throat as he struggled to swallow. The door to the den crashed open, the knob bouncing it off the wall again, and Alan stood in the doorway, staring in at them.

 

"What in the name of God is this?" He asked, his voice dangerously quiet. His face was a hot and angry shade of red and his attention was directed not at Jensen, but at Jared.

 

"Alan, please don't-"

 

"What is _he_ doing in my house?" Alan wanted to know, turning to his wife as he spoke. He looked back to Jared, pointing one shaking finger at him. "You. You get out of my house _now_ before I call the cops. And take that _thing_ out of my driveway."

 

Jared got up, shaking his head. "No problem. C'mon, Jen." He grabbed Jensen's arm and tugged him from the room, Alan following close on their heels. Presumably to make sure they left. Jensen felt sick to his stomach and went willingly. As he took their helmets from the stand by the door, Jared turned to look at Alan and was met with a ferocious glare. It didn't stop him. "I know you don't care, Ackles, but you're losing your son. Hope you can live with that."

 

"I'm not losing him. You're taking him away."

 

"And you can't be assed to stop me."

 

Alan glanced to Jensen, unblinking. "Why should I? If he wants to go, then he wants to go. What the hell should I care?"

 

Jared stared at him some more, then tugged his helmet on and headed for the bike. Jensen didn't follow him right away. Swallowing his nerves, he held his own helmet in front of him and looked his father in the eyes. 

 

"You're unbelievable, Dad."

 

Alan actually looked away. Only for a beat, but Jensen saw it. But then he was moving closer, a hand out in front of him as if to push Jensen out of the door. "I told you to leave," he reminded Jensen, not that he needed to. Within moments he was on the back of the bike, his arms around Jared's waist, listening to him rev the engine a few times before he sped out, tyres spraying up gravel.

 

 

 

 

It was only a minute after Jared pulled up outside Jeffrey's place that the cops arrived. One patrol car, blue lights flashing but the siren off, eased into the driveway right behind his bike. Jared recognised one of the officers inside it, and he pulled off his helmet and turned to face them, scowling. Jeffrey had come to the door, too, with Stevie right behind him.

 

"What the hell do you want?" He called, his voice gruff and annoyed.

 

"Sir, we're not going to cause any trouble. We just have to check out your boy's bike, make sure it's not stolen. We had a report-"

 

"Report, my _ass_ ," Jeff interrupted, as Jared rolled his eyes and said, "Ackles."

 

Shelby raced out then, scrabbling free between Jeff and Stevie, and came to a halt in front of the two police officers. She yipped at them both, about as terrifying as a gerbil, and Jensen couldn't help but laugh at her. He stepped out in front of Jared and knelt down, scooping the puppy into his arms. The officers both waited until she was quiet, licking the outside of Jensen's helmet, until they spoke again.

 

"Padalecki, we need to see your papers for the bike and your license too."

 

"Jesus Christ, this is bullshit," Jeffrey muttered, his fists clenched at his sides. Stevie had a hand on his arm, though Jensen thought that if Jeff wanted to start throwing punches then there was no way she could stop him. 

 

Jared held up his hands to the man. "Jeff, chill! I haven't even done anything, okay? I'll go get the papers."

 

"Sure thing, son," said the first officer. Pulman, his name was. Jared remembered him because he'd been the one to bust him for underage drinking one night. Thankfully he'd just brought him straight home to Jeff and told him to keep a better eye on the kid. "We'll be right here. Don't try going anywhere."

 

"I'm not gonna," Jared bit out.

 

"You guys seriously got nothing better to do than harrass the boy?" Jeff asked, as Jared went past him into the house. He noticed Clough, Pulman's partner, eyeing Jensen and told the younger boy to get inside too.

 

"We're not harrassing anyone, Mr Morgan. Just doing our job."

 

Jeff rolled his eyes. "Shut up, Clough, you sound like a dick when you say stuff like that. You not taught him anything yet, Drew?"

 

Pulman lowered his gaze. "He's four months on the job, Jeff. Cut the kid some slack."

 

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever you say." Jeff was still visibly pissed, but at least his muscles were more relaxed and he didn't look like he was about to knock someone out. He looked over at their squad car. "Turn those goddamn lights off, will you? Whole neighbourhood knows you're here now, so I don't think you need 'em any more."

 

Pulman nodded at Clough who headed back to the car and reached in to flick a switch. The front yard went mercifully darker and Jeff blinked a few times to try and get rid of the colors still dancing in his eyes. He turned as Jared opened the garage door and came back outside with all his documents and watched, satisfied, as he handed them over. Pulman looked through them thoroughly - just doing his job, thought Jeff, sourly - and then nodded and handed them back.

 

"Thanks for your time, Jay. We get a report like we did, we can't just ignore it, y'know?"

 

Jared's lip curled. "Yeah, I know. Ackles knows it too. You see him again, you can tell him he's an ass from me."

 

Pulman and Clough said nothing to that, and Jared didn't move again until they were both back in the squad car and it was pulling back out onto the road. Jared rolled his bike into the garage with Jeff following, while Stevie went back through the front door and locked up behind herself. 

 

"So?" Jeff asked.

 

"Ackles came home while we were still over there. Guess he was more pissed off than I thought."

 

"Figures. Jensen okay?"

 

"I guess."

 

Jeffrey nodded, thoughtful, and then turned to go into the house. Jensen was in the kitchen with Stevie, his helmet sat on the kitchen table and Shelby in his lap as he tickled her belly. He looked up when Jeff came in, closely followed by Jared.

 

"You all right, kid?"

 

"I'm fine. Are they gone?"

 

"Yeah, they're gone. What happened with your Dad?"

 

Jensen shrugged. "He came home early, threw me out all over again. Up until then we were having a really good time. Uh. Speaking of which..." Jensen carefully set Shelby down on the floor and stood, pointing to the door through to the garage. "I really gotta go make a phone call."

 

Jared smirked and Jensen felt his cheeks flush, because he had a feeling that Jared knew exactly who that call might be to and what it might be about. He excused himself and headed out to his and Jared's space, closing the door behind him.

 

Stevie, who'd stayed quiet for the most part, asked Jared what exactly that had been about.

 

"I might've, uh, popped his cherry today."

 

"Do we want to hear this?" Jeff asked.

 

"Probably not, but I'm telling you anyway. Right there in his house. It was fucking awesome."

 

"Jesus _Christ_ , Jay, shut the hell up."

 

"Why? You bragged about Stevie."

 

At that Stevie's eyebrows shot up and she turned on Jeff. "You what?"

 

"I did _not_!"

 

"Yeah, he did," Jared continued, oblivious to how much trouble he was probably getting himself into. "Said you were a better ride than the Harley."

 

Jeff's hands were clenched into fists once more and he reached out and grabbed Jared's collar, narrowing his eyes. "Better shut up right there, JT. 'Fore you lose some damned _teeth_."

 

Jared just grinned, lifting both hands. "Easy, old man. She knows I'm kidding."

 

Stevie laughed. "I thought you were kidding, now I'm not quite so sure." She pulled Jeff back and he let Jared go so he could wrap his arms around her instead. "Good ride?"

 

"Huh."

 

She stood on her toes and kissed the tip of his nose, ignoring Jared's gagging sounds as she did so. Jeff called him an asshole, but was cut off as Stevie moved her kiss to his mouth. "C'mon, mister. Don't want the kids putting us to shame, do we?"

 

"Oh, seriously?" Jared moaned. "With us in the house? That's fucking sick."

 

Stevie shot him a sidelong wink and all but dragged Jeff to the stairs.

 

 

 

 

In the garage Jensen was speaking to the only person he wanted to tell: Chris. He didn't feel like going into detail; he just wanted his best buddy to congratulate him. To reassure him that he'd done the right thing. It was exactly what Chris did.

 

"I can't believe you did it in your Dad's house, though. You might as well have gone in there with spray paint and wrote 'Fuck You' on the walls."

 

"Almost felt like it," Jensen admitted. 

 

"He deserves it, that asshole."

 

"Yeah, he called the cops out on Jay too. _That_ was fun to come home to. They didn't do anything. I think Dad just wanted to embarrass him by having them come round here."

 

"You think it worked?"

 

Jensen snorted. "Take a hell of a lot more than that to make Jay feel any shame. I think the neighbours probably see more of the cops than he ever did."

 

"You're likely right. Hey, you doing anything Christmas Eve?"

 

"Jay says he's got something planned for the evening, but before then I think we're just hanging out here. Mom said something about coming over. If she still does, I don't know... Why, you want to come over too?" Jensen looked around as he heard Jared on the steps down to the garage and barely heard Chris's reply that he didn't want to interrupt anything. Jensen closed his eyes, tilting his head to one side as Jared wrapped strong arms around him and kissed the side of his neck. "You won't be intruding, idiot." He cut off when Jared took the phone from his hand and brought it to his own ear, keeping one arm tight around his boyfriend's body.

 

"Hey, Chris, it's Jay. Come over Christmas Eve, around six-thirty. 'Less you gotta go to church, 'cause it could be a late night. You game?"

 

"Uh... Sure."

 

"Cool, we'll see you then." He snapped the phone shut and threw it onto the couch behind Jensen, then covered the other man's mouth with his own, kissing him hard. He knew Chris wouldn't be too mad and if Jensen was about to tell him off for hanging up on his friend, then he forgot about doing so pretty quickly.

 

 

 

 

Jensen's mom brought Kenzie with her on Christmas Eve, much to his sister's delight. He was growing ever more certain that she was nurturing some kind of crush on Jared and he was secretly amused by the way Jared played up to that. They didn't talk about their last visit together, and Jensen didn't mention the visit from the cops that had followed either. His mom looked tired enough without having that added to her worries. He helped her carry in four large boxes from the car, while Jared fixed them all some coffee and found the cookies that Stevie had stashed away the day before.

 

"You all right, mom?" Jensen asked, as he placed the last box on the floor of the garage. She looked around, not meeting his eyes when she answered.

 

"I'm fine, hon. Just tired. Christmas preparation is pretty exhausting."

 

He nodded, pulling at a thread that hung off the left wrist of his sweatshirt. "You ever consider just leaving him?"

 

That got her attention on him. "Of course I have," she told him, her voice sharper than it had been a moment ago. "It's just not that easy, Jensen. I have Kenzie still at home and I want the best for her. I want her to have every chance you and your brother had."

 

"Dad didn't give me that many chances," Jensen reminded her.

 

"You know he would have if you'd stayed at home." Her expression softened. "You know what I meant, baby. He's a lawyer, he's not some stupid schmuck. If I tried to leave then he'd fix it so me and Kenzie had nothing left. Besides... Deep down I know he still loves you."

 

"He's got a hell of a way of showing it," came the muttered reply.

 

"I'm sorry. For God's sake, don't be disappointed in me."

 

Jensen shook his head, reaching out and stepping forward to wrap his arms around his mom. "I'm not, mom," he told her, burying his head in her hair. "I'm really not. I'm just glad you're here."

 

"Me too, honey." They stood where they were, holding onto each other, for a few more moments. Then Donna patted Jensen's back and stepped away. "Come on, let's go make sure your sister hasn't embarrassed herself."

 

"She knows she doesn't stand a chance, right?"

 

"All her friends are already talking about boys and she's not so young and naïve as she used to be either. She probably won't let the fact that he's your boyfriend stop her flirting."

 

"Then you're absolutely right, Mom. We should get in there and stop her."

 

He wasn't surprised to find Jared was busy having his arm tugged on by Kenzie as he held her Christmas present from him and Jensen well out of her reach. He was laughing at her futile attempts to try and climb him and wound up tossing the gift over to Jensen when he saw him come in.

 

"Jay, stop teasing my poor sister."

 

"Oh, sure, take _her_ side." Jared watched Jensen hand the present to his sister and tutted. "You know you don't get to open that 'til tomorrow, right?"

 

Kenzie hugged the box to her chest and ignored him. "Thank you Jensen! Thank you Jared!"

 

"Yeah, yeah, you're welcome. You can save the abuse for tomorrow when you find out what he got you. You like Henry Fonda, right?"

 

Kenzie wrinkled her nose at him, then decided ignoring him completely was the best policy and pulled a chair back to sit. She looked unsure, though, and Jensen just had to stifle a laugh. He sat next to Jared while his mom took the chair next to Kenzie and they each pulled a mug of coffee toward them. They were halfway through their drinks when Jeff and Stevie arrived back from a long walk with the puppy. Kenzie immediately turned into the young girl Jensen wanted her to be and crouched down on the floor to fuss and coo over Shelby, while Jeff made more coffee and Stevie talked happily to Donna. 

 

Jensen looked around at everyone, smiling as he thought this was what Christmas should be like. Jared squeezed his hand under the table and he leaned over for a quick kiss, ignoring his sister's sudden eagle eyes as she watched him. Jealous, he thought, and laughed quietly to himself.

 

 

 

 

It was dark by the time they saw Donna and Kenzie out. Stevie promised that Jensen's sister could come over any time she liked to see Shelby, even take her for a walk if she wanted, and they all hugged out on the porch before saying goodbye and Merry Christmas. Jensen waved at them until they were out of sight, feeling a heaviness that he wished he didn't. Jared sensed it and asked him if he was okay as they headed back inside.

 

"Yeah, I'm good. Better for seeing them again."

 

"We got half an hour before Chris gets here. Long enough to grab a shower and get changed."

 

"Uh.. For what?"

 

"Told you. Christmas Eve tradition. You'll see." Jared winked at him and then made for the garage, already well ahead. 

 

"What should I wear?"

 

"Anything you like!" Jared called back over his shoulder. "Just be comfortable."

 

 

 

 

Chris arrived right on time, to find Jared and Jeff both ready while Jensen and Stevie were still in the garage and upstairs respectively. He made a crack about knowing who the girl was in the relationship just as Jensen came in from the garage, his hair still wet and his shirt only half-buttoned over his long-sleeved undershirt.

 

"Hell, you need a little longer to get yourself pretty?" Chris asked, throwing one arm around Jensen's shoulders as soon as he was close enough.

 

"I already am. Prettier than you, anyhow," Jensen retorted, ducking away to rub the towel around his shoulders over his hair some more. He folded the towel over the back of one of the kitchen chairs when he was done and ran his fingers through his hair, combing it out. Once Stevie was downstairs Jeff told everyone to get their jackets on and said to Chris to just follow him and Jared. The bikes were both ready outside - Jeff's Harley and Jared's Suicycle - and Chris quickly got into his truck to follow. The roads were quiet this late on the day before Christmas, and, although the wind against them was biting, it was not cold enough to have frozen. Jensen was glad for that. He wouldn't have fancied being on the back of Jared's bike had it been icy.

 

Jensen had no idea where they were headed. They took off down the highway, Chris just managing to keep up, and Jeff turned his bike off on a turning after the one that led out to Mickey's. He didn't think Jared had ever brought him out this way before, which he supposed figured if this was something they only did on Christmas Eve. For about ten minutes there was nothing either side of them, just darkness and wildlife and open land. Then he made out hazy lights in the distance and, as they got nearer, he could see that the light was coming from three large bonfires. There were smaller lights between the fires, too, that as they got closer still he worked out were from bikes and trucks parked all around them.

 

The music was loud and Jensen could feel it going through him when he set his feet on the ground after Jared brought the bike to a stop. Chris eased into a space behind them and jumped out, shutting the truck door with a grin.

 

"Holy shit, this place is amazing!"

 

Jared took his helmet off and nodded over at him. "Thought you'd enjoy this. We got music, barbecue, Harley Santa-"

 

"Harley Santa?" Jensen echoed, his own helmet now resting on the seat of the bike.

 

"Yeah, big jolly red guy, rides a '79 Low Rider."

 

"Tell me he doesn't give out presents..."

 

"He doesn't. But he does take your money. Charity, Jen. That's what this whole thing is for. We come every year, for Mom's sake. Money goes to the hospital she was in when she died."

 

Jensen swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat and nodded, not wanting to say something wrong. Jared just grinned at him. 

 

"It's okay, Jen, you're still allowed to enjoy yourself. In fact, it's kinda mandatory. I save the getting upset for tomorrow when I go see her."

 

He still didn't know what to say to that, but Jeff saved him then as he approached with Stevie at his side. "Come on guys! Let's get some barbecue before it all goes!"

 

Jensen had to agree. He was starving and still more bikes were pulling up just as they stood there. He hunkered down in his jacket, turning the collar up around his neck. It was going to be a long night.


	34. Chapter thirty-two

The alarm went off way too early.

 

Startled, Jensen reflexively reached over and switched the beeping alarm off, glancing at the numbers on the clock. "Oh, you have got to be fucking _kidding_ me," Jensen grumbled. He flopped his head back down on the pillow, groaning into the fabric and feathers. 

 

Very uncharacteristically, Jared was up, wide awake and swinging his legs over the side to stretch. He reached over and patted Jensen's backside to rouse him. "Come on, get up."

 

"We've had forty-five minutes of sleep, you masochist," Jensen snarled. He pulled his pillow up over his head, trying to sink back into sleep.

 

Jared laughed and patted him again. "Come on," he said again, gentler this time. "We gotta go."

 

"Where?" Jensen asked, pulling his head out from underneath the pillow long enough to shoot a gaze-full of daggers in Jared's direction. "It's frickin' three AM."

 

"I know, Captain Obvious," he returned. "I told you we'd be getting up early to go somewhere."

 

"Yeah, early," Jensen nodded. "I figured eight, nine o'clock."

 

"You figured wrong." Jared stood from the bed and yanked the covers off, exposing Jensen's half-clothed body to the crisp garage air. He turned off the heater and gathered up some clothes from the floor. 

 

"I hate you," Jensen grumbled.

 

"You love me."

 

Sighing, Jensen sat up in bed, catching a hooded sweatshirt that Jared threw at him. "Where are we going, anyhow?" he asked, threading his arms through the proper holes. He pulled the shirt on and then flopped back down to the bed.

 

"Skinny Christmas. We're breaking into your school."

 

Sitting back up, Jensen peered over at Jared, watching him pull on his own sweatshirt. "What?"

 

"Yeah, come on, let's go."

 

"We're not breaking into the school."

 

"Yes, we are," Jared nodded. "Every year, we find a different pool to use. This year, I chose your school. Come on, can we get going, please?"

 

"Jared, it's Christmas _day_."

 

Jared wiggled his feet into an old pair of trainers, not bothering to untie them. "Yes," he agreed. "The day baby Jesus was born, and the day we fucking break into your school."

 

Jensen could only stare at him for a moment. "We are not breaking into the school."

 

"Yes, we are," Jared grinned. 

 

 

 

 

 

"What about Jeff and Stevie?" Jensen whispered.

 

"What about them?"

 

"I thought you said this was tradition?"

 

In the light of the flashlight, Jared looked down at him, smiling. "You expecting someone to be here?"

 

Jensen paused for a moment, slyly glancing to the side. "No."

 

"Then why are you whispering?"

 

"Because we just broke into my fucking school!"

 

Jared laughed and shook his head, pushing through the locker room door. "Relax," he said. "Only the parts of the school that have alarms are the ones that have important or expensive stuff in them. Like the computer lab or the science rooms."

 

"How do you know that?"

 

Jared winked at him as they headed towards the pool. "Used to be high society, Jen," he replied. "Remember?"

 

"This was _your_ school?"

 

Chuckling, Jared shook his head, turned off the flashlight, never answering the question directly. He set down the torch, placing it on the wall that separated the swimmer's area from the spectator's. He toed off his sneakers and pulled off his sweatshirt. "You going to do this, or what?"

 

It was too damn early for this. Jensen sighed, raking his fingers through his hair. "We broke into the school, on Christmas _day_ at that, in order to swim in the _pool_?"

 

Jared paused in his movements, throwing a thumb towards the doorway. "You want to head off to the swimming hole instead?" he asked. "Might be a little cooler, just to warn you."

 

Jensen held up his hand, palm out. "No," he refused. "This will be fine. It's just weird, is all."

 

Shucking his jeans, Jared smiled over at him. "I'll make it worth your while," he said. "Grumpy-ass."

 

Jared had been going commando underneath his jeans, and Jensen eyed the skin bared to him. He watched, with a reluctant smile, as the man stepped to the edge of the pool, glanced down at the still blue water, and then plunged into it. Bubbles rushed to the surface, quickly followed by Jared, who spit water out of his mouth and laughed.

 

"Come on, beautiful," he encouraged. "Don't make me drag you in here."

 

Jensen sighed, shaking his head. "If I do this," he said, tugging at the hem of the hooded sweatshirt he wore, "you can't tell a _soul_. Got it?"

 

"Got it," Jared nodded, as he watched Jensen disrobe. "The only ones that will know are you, me, and Jeff and Stevie, who are doing the exact same thing in someone else's pool."

 

Laughing, Jensen tossed his jeans aside, followed by his boxer briefs. "You come from such a weird family."

 

" _Me_?" Jared challenged.

 

He knew Jensen heard his question, but the young man let it go. Instead, he took perfect swimmer’s form -- albeit in his birthday suit -- at the edge of the pool and dove in, barely making a splash. When he surfaced, it was gently and easily, and close to Jared. They played for a few minutes, splashing each other and diving down to the bottom of the pool, daring each other to see who could hold their breath the longest. Of course, Jensen won that round. 

 

Finally, Jared managed to grab hold of Jensen, maneuvering him to the edge of the pool. He clasped the white tile and leaned into Jensen, kissing him and letting himself half-hang and half-float in the water. Jensen's arms slipped around him, as well as his legs, clinging to him as they kissed.

 

It was a strange sensation to be naked in the pool. Granted, the swimsuit he always wore during practice and meets didn't cover much, but Jensen felt exhilarated. He felt even more alive when Jared let go of the edge of the pool, slipped his hand underneath the surface of the water to touch him. The contrast of the cool water and Jared's warm hand made him gasp slightly amidst the kiss. He pulled away long enough to look at Jared, pupils dilated, and then closed his eyes, his head tilting back to rest against the pool wall. 

 

Jared knew the invite when he saw it. Smiling, he bowed his head and set his open mouth against Jensen's throat, tasting chlorine and salt. He found a nerve, a spot that made Jensen's breath catch in his throat, and worked it, stroking at the young man's hardened cock. He felt Jensen reach up to the edge of the pool, grasping at the edge to hold himself up, or maybe to ground himself, Jared didn't know. He bit at Jensen's shoulder, just enough to leave a red mark, and stroked him a few more times before slipping his hand even lower.

 

Jensen thought perhaps he should have been ready for the first circle around the ring of muscle that Jared had managed to exploit before. He should have known the electricity it sent through his system. Should have. But when he felt that first pass, and then the second revolution start, he couldn't pretend he'd been ready. His mouth fell open, and a ragged sound escaped his throat. Jared only circled a few times before pushing inside, sending Jensen's body rising out of the water just slightly. 

 

Still gripping the edge of the pool in his hands, Jensen lowered his head down to look at Jared, who returned the gaze. Wet lashes and hazel eyes, skin beaded with a mixture of sweat and chlorine. Jensen let himself be opened, let Jared work him into a state of need and finally frenzy. Jared watched the muscles in Jensen's forearms contract as he clung to the edge of the pool, coming hard in the clear blue water. As the last moan escaped him, Jared leaned in to kiss Jensen again, eyes open and watching the young man's look of pure ecstasy.

 

Heart pounding, chest heaving, Jensen opened his eyes -- when had he closed them? -- and looked at Jared. "You don't play fair."

 

Jared smiled. "When have I ever?" he returned. "Told you I'd make it worth your while."

 

Jensen laughed and nodded. "Yes, you did."

 

"Come on."

 

"Where to now?"

 

Jared nodded towards the other end of the pool. "Shallower."

 

"Why?"

 

Again, he smiled. "We need to get a good footing."

 

Jensen returned the smile, knowing exactly what Jared was thinking of. And he would have been lying if he'd said he hadn't wanted to do the same thing.

 

 

 

 

 

Jeffrey and Stevie were already home by the time Jared and Jensen rolled in. Jensen set a hand to the hood of the muscle car, smiling. "Still warm," he announced. "Seems they got a little distracted just like we did."

 

Jensen chuckled and stashed his helmet where it belonged. He put his arm around Jared as the man draped his arm around Jensen's shoulders, and together they entered the house through the garage. 

 

"Merry fucking Christmas and all that shit," Jared announced loudly. 

 

The presents that had once been piled underneath the tree were now put in neat piles in designated areas. Stevie's organizational skills had struck again. They each had their own stack of presents, ready and waiting to be opened. Jared chuckled at the sight. He let go of Jensen when Shelby rushed at him, barking and wagging her tail. "Hello, baby!"

 

"About damn time," Jeffrey returned. "We've been waiting for hours."

 

"No, you haven't," Jensen chuckled.

 

"Yeah," Jared agreed, straightening. Shelby was in his arms, wriggling and licking at his face, her tail thumping against his belly. "The car's still warm, genius."

 

Jeffrey smiled. "Can't blame a man for getting distracted," he winked. "Seems you guys got a little distracted too."

 

"That we did."

 

"Alright," Stevie interrupted. "Get in here so that we can open presents. I want my loot." She sat in the recliner, Jeffrey plopping down on the floor in front of her.

 

"Whose pool did you get?" Jared asked, slouching down upon the sofa. He watched Jensen follow Jeffrey's example and sit down upon the floor, letting Jared stretch out on the couch. Jared set his hand against Jensen's shoulder, fingers grazing back and forth against the exposed skin of his neck.

 

"Alice Booker's," Jeffrey announced.

 

"Oh, my God," Jared laughed. "That old bat down the street that shoots any dog or cat in her yard with a damn pellet gun?"

 

"That'd be the one," he nodded. 

 

"Shelby had a fantastic time in her pool," Stevie giggled.

 

Jared laughed boisterously, mouth wide open as he cackled. Old Lady Booker would have had a heart attack if she'd known a dog was in her pool. 

 

Jeffrey let his head fall back against Stevie's lap and smiled at her. "I had a better time," he said.

 

As if on cue, Shelby walked up to Jensen and sniffed at his face, perhaps to make sure he wasn't eating anything that he wasn't sharing.

 

"Poor Shelby," Jensen cooed. "You had to be witness to all that awful stuff. You'll be scarred for life, won't you?"

 

While Jeffrey chuckled, Shelby sneezed at Jensen's words. She moved closer to Jeffrey and flopped down on the floor next to him, ready for a nap.

 

"Alright, let's open our presents," Stevie said, clapping her hands. "Gimme my stuff."

 

Jeffrey chuckled and handed her a present from her pile of boxes. He took one of his own, Jared and Jensen following suit. Stevie wanted them to watch each other open the presents, to stretch it out as long as possible, but Jared couldn't wait. Stevie later admitted that she couldn't wait either, and they had torn into their gifts. 

 

They'd each gotten each other something, a kit for classic car maintenance, a gift card for the Harley shop in the city, a new set of strings for a guitar, a beautiful silver necklace, a box of liver snaps. Jared opened his gift from Jeffrey and stopped short. He looked over at his adoptive father and smiled. 

 

"Is this what's in the box?" he asked, knowing how boxes tended to get recycled at Christmas time.

 

"No," Jeffrey answered. "They were selling the brand new, unmarked boxes, so I figured, 'why not fuck with Jay a little'?"

 

Jared laughed and tore off the rest of the paper. "Ha, ha! It is! Holy shit, Jeff!"

 

Jensen turned and saw an XBox360 kit sitting on Jared's lap, including the Guitar Hero game that Jared had been eyeing. He smiled knowingly, and looked up into Jared's happy eyes. 

 

"Your sister is going to hate me," Jared told him.

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head. "I don't think that's humanly possible," he said. "She might have even more of a crush on you though, be warned." He tore open another present and furrowed his brow. "How the hell did you know about golf?" he asked, turning the box of golf balls around for Jeffrey and Stevie to look at.

 

"I have my sources," Jeffrey smiled.

 

"Your Mom," Jared admitted. "He grilled her. Found out you were on the school's team."

 

"Yeah, awhile ago," Jensen nodded. "But I really enjoyed it, thank you guys." He picked up another present, recognizing his mother's handwriting. "Speak of the devil, this one's from her." He tore off the paper and paused, seeing the brand name "Canon" looking back at him. "No way."

 

"What?"

 

Excited, he tore off the paper like a child that's just figured out the extra fun part of Christmas. "No way!"

 

"What'd she get you?" Jared peered over Jensen's shoulder, looking down at the box. "Holy shit, she got you a fucking digital camera?"

 

"Oh, my God, this is awesome." He opened the box and tore open the plastic packages. "Look at it!" He found a memory card that had been stuck inside the packaging. "Two gigabytes!"

 

Jeffrey looked back at Stevie. "I'm assuming that's good."

 

She nodded. "That's very good," she agreed with a smile. "Very cool of his Mom."

 

"Open yours," Jensen said to Jared, slightly distracted by all of the gadgets he had to pore over.

 

Jared found the package with the same wrapping paper that had been relocated to his pile. He thumbed open the tag and found Donna's name scrawled there along with "Much love." He smiled and ripped the paper away from one corner. He, too, saw "Canon" on the box and cackled. Opening it further, he found a camcorder staring back at him. "God, your Mom totally rocks, you know that?"

 

"I foresee many hours of porn being made with that," Jeffrey laughed.

 

Jared hugged the camcorder to his chest. "Get your own, you pervert," he teased.

 

"What'd she get you guys?" 

 

Jeffrey glanced at Jensen for a moment before turning to look through the presents. He found a large box underneath the others he had yet to open and pulled it closer. "It's to both of us, babe," he said to Stevie. 

 

"Bring it on," she motioned to him. "I like 'em big."

 

With a sparkle in his eye, he looked at her, chuckling.

 

"Eew, save the innuendos for when we're not here," Jared complained.

 

Jeffrey pulled at the pretty paper that had probably been taped on by a professional wrapper at some high-end department store. "That was a pretty big word, JT," he said to Jared. "I think maybe Jensen's rubbing off...on...you."

 

His words slowed as he gazed down at the box that he and Stevie were opening. "Holy shit." 

 

The word "BOSE" was emblazoned upon the box, and everyone stared at it, stunned. 

 

"She got you a damn Bose surround system?" Jared asked.

 

"Looks like it," Jeffrey nodded. "Jensen, you need to call your mother and tell her she's spent way too much money on us. We can't ever repay her."

 

Jensen smiled. "I have a feeling she'll disagree," he said. "And she's always saying that it's you she can never repay."

 

 

 

 

He was doing it again. Jensen could just _feel_ it. With his glasses donned, he looked up from the Canon and, sure enough, Jared had the video camera pointed at him again. "Okay, really?" he asked, annoyed.

 

"What, you have your camera, and I have mine," Jared smiled. "Do something."

 

Jensen couldn't help but smile as he sighed. "What?"

 

"I don't know," he shrugged. "Take off your clothes."

 

"No stripping!" Jeffrey yelled from the kitchen, where he and Stevie were getting things ready to go into the oven for Christmas dinner. The food would bake most of the day, and the house would smell divine by the time it was ready.

 

Jensen laughed, looking back at him through the open floorplan, and then turned back to Jared, shrugging his shoulders. "No stripping," he repeated.

 

"Don't listen to _him_ ," Jared said. "The man's a prude."

 

"I am not a prude, Jared," Jeffrey corrected. "But stupidity is bliss. I don't need to know what you two do together."

 

Jensen chuckled, eyeing Jared. The camera wasn't going to be turned off of him until he did something, so he tugged at the hem of his t-shirt, exposing his chest to him for a split second. 

 

"Yow!" Jared screeched. " _That's_ what I'm talkin' about!"

 

"Come on," Jensen laughed. "Set up Guitar Hero. I'll kick your ass."

 

"The hell you will," he said, turning off the video camera. "No one that plays golf is going to kick my ass in Guitar Hero. You've seen me at the arcade."

 

"Yeah, facing twelve-year-olds."

 

"Hey, the world is a cruel place. Better they find out now than later."

 

"Meanie."

 

Jared smiled and straddled Jensen's legs. He bent at the waist and rested one hand at either side of him, leaned against the back of the sofa. "Guitar Hero now," he said softly, "and then you can take some naked pictures of me later."

 

Jensen looked up at him and smiled brightly, one of his eyebrows arching. "That sounds like a plan," he nodded. He leaned his head back and let Jared kiss him, tongues sneaking out quickly to touch. Jared shoved away from him, straightening and digging into the Xbox packaging. He would have it set up in no time, and Jensen would lose horribly. But he didn't care. This had been, by far, the best Christmas he'd had. And it wasn't because of the wonderful gifts he'd gotten. It was corny, but he believed he'd already gotten the best present there was, that day he'd stumbled into the gas station.

 

Sitting there on the sofa, in the house he'd moved into, and with the family he'd adopted as his own, Jensen thought things couldn't get much better than this.

 

Everything was perfect.


	35. Chapter thirty-three

  
Author's notes: **three chapters today!**  
eviltwin and bloody would like to thank you for all the wonderful comments that you all have been leaving, and thank you for reading and hope that you are all enjoying the story! *hugs*  
______________________________  
  


* * *

It was just after dinner when Jared headed off to the garage alone. Jeff saw him go and got up himself, heading to the door for his jacket. Stevie obviously knew what was going on as she said nothing about it, but Jensen couldn't remember them saying they were going out. He asked where they were headed.

 

"Me and Jay are off to the cemetery," Jeff told him. "I don't reckon it's something you need to do, at least not this year, but the boy'll probably need you when we get back."

 

Jensen swallowed and nodded without a word. Jeff went outside and he heard him starting the car up. He'd forgotten all about it, despite Jared having mentioned it. It was a surprise to him how easy it was to forget that this wasn't Jared's real family at all - that none of them were related by blood.

 

The door opened again and he looked around, puzzled to see Jared there looking over at him. "What's up?"

 

"Changed my mind. Come with me?"

 

Jensen nodded again, getting up, and Jared waited while he pulled some boots on and grabbed a jacket. He followed him out to the car and Jared let him sit in the front seat while he sprawled in the back of the car on his own. The drive over to the cemetery was taken in silence.

 

 

 

 

Jared hung back with Jensen when they arrived, letting Jeffrey go in first. It must have been normal for him to do this, Jensen figured, because still no words were spoken. The cemetery itself was out of town; quiet and beautiful, even on a cold day like today was. Jensen glanced around at the other headstones, his mind wandering. He wasn't sure why Jared wanted him here. After all, he had no experience with this kind of thing. The closest he'd got was a school trip to a war memorial, way back when he was a junior. 

 

He noticed movement on a path that ran parallel to the one they were stood waiting on and realized with a start that they weren't the only ones there. There was a young family, too, huddled around a small headstone that Jensen knew must belong to a child. He felt his throat close up a little bit and looked away, hating that he felt like an intruder here. He looked up at Jared instead, and found him gazing off into the distance, his breath clouding in front of him each time he exhaled.

 

Hunching down into his jacket, Jensen squeezed his hands together and shuddered with the cold. That was when Jared reached out with one arm and wrapped it around him, pulling him against his side. 

 

"Are you okay?" Jared asked.

 

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

 

"Hey, I'm good. This'll be fine."

 

"Can I ask you something?"

 

"You want to know why I asked you to come with me?" Jared asked, looking round and down at him. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to the side of Jensen's head. "Wanted to show my mom this wonderful guy that's come into my life. That's all."

 

After another five minutes, Jeffrey returned. He went to wait in the car, patting Jared's shoulder as he went past. Jensen stayed by Jared's side as they made their way to the headstone. It looked like Jeffrey had cleared it up while he'd been there and Jensen stood awkwardly as Jared crouched down and reached out, running his fingertips over the indents in the stone that carved out his mother's name. He could already feel a hard lump rising in his throat and he swallowed it down. Jared hadn't invited him to let him stand there and cry. He'd invited him for a little extra strength.

 

"Hey, mom," he heard Jared say, his voice, though quiet, breaking the stillness around the grave. "So... It's kind of been an interesting year."

 

Jensen had never got this. Talking to someone who wasn't there. He'd seen his grandma do it and it made him feel uncomfortable. That it was something that was so against the grain to what he expected from Jared just made that feeling about ten times worse. Jared must have known what he was thinking because he looked up at him then, showed him a sad smile.

 

"She listens to me, Jen. It's okay if you don't want to say anything, or even if you don't believe that, but she listens. Last year I told her that life was getting too difficult." He turned away again and Jensen didn't know what to say to that. "Told her I was done, that I just needed help. Someone to understand."

 

"What about Jeff?" Jensen asked, in almost a whisper.

 

"Truth be told, I think he was about ready to give up on me that last time. One more lot of trouble, he'd have stopped bailing me out."

 

Jensen nodded, lost for words.

 

"But then Jensen comes along," Jared continued, speaking to his mom's gravestone again. "Pretty much saves me."

 

"It was the other way around," Jensen murmured.

 

"So I don't need to ask for anything this year, mom. I just wanted you to know that I'm okay. Be a hell of a lot more okay if you were still here, but I guess if you were still here then everything'd be different, huh?"

 

Jensen watched him press his hand to the stone, digging his fingers in so hard that the ends turned white. Jared was quiet for nearly a full minute, his head bowed, the hair not contained in his wool cap hanging in front of his eyes. 

 

"Love you, mom," he said, finally. "Miss you too." 

 

Jensen reached down, rested a hand on his shoulder. He figured Jared was about ready to go and he stood back to let the other man get to his feet. He looked paler than he had, his eyes shining, but Jared would later tell him that it hadn't been as hard as it usually was. He pulled Jensen into his arms right there, kissed his cheek.

 

"Thanks for coming with," he told him. "Sometime soon I'm gonna tell you everything about her. So you'll know."

 

"Thank you," was all he could say in answer.

 

 

 

 

The garage, normally a health hazard anyway with Jay's 'projects' scattered all over, was absolutely crammed. Jensen carefully picked his way through the furniture that had been moved out of the house for the party and got one foot on the bottom rung of the ladder. He tilted his head back just in time to see a bright red sweatshirt falling towards him.

 

"Oh, shit! Man, I didn't see you!"

 

"It's okay, Jay, it's just a sweater. What're you up to?"

 

"Getting into my costume for the party. Are you ready yet?"

 

"Not exactly. I wanted to wait until you were done. Don't want to spoil the surprise."

 

"Can't believe you're holding out on me with this," Jay said, leaning over the side so he was looking down at Jensen. "You're a real son of a bitch, you know that?"

 

"Don't let my mother hear you say that," Jensen warned. "And she might, since she's here now. That's what I came in to tell you. Thought I'd warn you in case Kenzie-"

 

"Jensen!" The squeal cut him off and Jensen just had time to turn around before his little sister was crashing into him, wrapping her arms tight around his body.

 

"Give a guy some warning, girl!" Jensen scolded, hugging her back before extricating himself from her embrace. "And some privacy would be great. Jay's still getting ready. And, no, you can't see. Go on inside and ask Jeff for a drink."

 

"Okay... Chris just got here too, with Dani. He looks really cute."

 

"Yeah, and he's taken. And way too old for you, go on!"

 

Reluctantly, Kenzie gave in and went back inside the house. When he turned back, Jared was on his way down. Jensen stood back and gaped at him.

 

"Catchin' flies?" Jared asked, turning to face him once his feet were on the floor. He wore green scrubs, a stethoscope around his neck, and his chunky boots on his feet.

 

"You make a hot doctor," Jensen told him, lifting one hand to pull Jared's collar away from his skin slightly. There was nothing under the scrubs top but skin. "You won't get cold?"

 

"There'll be too many people to get cold. Where've you been, anyway?"

 

Jensen smiled, backed up a step. "Fetching my costume, running an errand. And if you go inside the house then I'll get changed that much quicker."

 

"Still playing secrets, huh?" At Jensen's nod, Jared gave up. "Fine, fine. Just don't be too long. You got me all worked up and if you make me wait I might just go crazy!"

 

"Jay, you already are."

 

Tutting, Jared dropped a kiss on Jensen's lips and headed inside the house, shutting the garage door behind him. It dulled the music only slightly, but Jensen was glad for the privacy. He went back to the bag which he had hidden behind the sofa and pulled out the main part of his costume, stretching and straightening the feathers out. He didn't know what the hell had possessed him to go for this costume, but there was no way he was backing out now. Not when he'd been winding Jared up about it for almost a full week. 

 

Checking the door to the kitchen was locked, he stripped off to his shorts and pulled on the ripped pale blue jeans that his little sister had suggested. He peeled off the tape that was covering his right nipple and gently fingered the bar that was now stuck through it. He'd been told he'd have to be careful with it and keep it clean, though he'd leave it up to Jared to tell him whether or not that meant they couldn't have a little fun with it. Right now, he thought, it would probably sting too much. But at least Jared could look and, hopefully, be surprised.

 

Almost as surprised as his mom would be, probably.

 

Unfastening the straps that crossed over his arms and behind his back to hold the wings in place, Jensen smiled to himself at that thought. Yeah, his mom was going to be very surprised. The wings were bigger than he thought they'd be, too. And a lot more real-looking. They were soft, and a clean and brilliant white, and Jensen had a hard time adjusting to the weight of them on his body. He reached one hand back and stroked along the outside edge of one of them experimentally, but they didn't seem as fragile as he'd thought they would be. They'd probably put up with what the night would bring.

 

He'd considered going the whole night barefoot, but he knew that Jeff planned to let off some fireworks out front come the turn of the New Year, so he gave in and put on the heavy biker boots that Jeff and Stevie had bought for him.

 

 

 

 

The house was packed fit to bursting when Jensen opened the door to the kitchen and peeked his head around. He couldn't see Jared at all, although he saw a few people he did know. Trevor was there in some kind of bright pink costume that was mostly lycra, sequins and feathers, false tits securely in place. Eric was out there too, not in costume, sat in a corner with a bottle of JD talking to a middle-aged woman that Jensen assumed must be a friend of Jeff's. He could see Kenzie, looking like she felt completely out of place amongst all these people that were far older than she was, and he could see his mom and Stevie hanging out near the bar area, pouring out some drinks and laughing together.

 

He was glad his mom had made it. Even felt kind of horribly pleased when she'd told him exactly what she'd said to Alan before coming out. A little guilty, maybe, but mostly pleased. 

 

"Jen!" He looked up, found Chris making his way through the people towards him. He stopped short, let out a low whistle. Jensen realized that his friend was staring at his chest. "Holy shit, look at you."

 

"Thanks, man. Digging the hair."

 

Chris ran his fingers through the shoulder-length wig, red and black locks falling between his fingers. "Think Dani kind of likes it, too. You seen her?"

 

Jensen smiled mischievously as Dani grabbed Chris from behind right then, startling him. "Have now. Nice costume, girl."

 

Dani, in a tight firefighter outfit, laughed at the compliment, her eyes sparkling. "You too, Jen. Very nice."

 

"Boyfriend standing right here," Chris reminded her, and she rolled her eyes and kissed his cheek hard.

 

"Doesn't stop me looking, Chris. Has Jared seen it yet?"

 

"Not yet. You guys know where he went?"

 

"I think he's outside helping Jeff set things up ready for later."

 

"Okay, cool. I'll wait till he comes back in. Meantime I'd better go talk to Kenzie. She's looking a little lost."

 

Jensen was with his little sister still when Jared came back into the house. He noticed, because Kenzie's eyes went wide and then she hopped from one foot to another and nervously excused herself. Frowning, Jensen looked around to see what she'd seen just as Jared got to him.

 

"Christ, Jensen," Jared breathed, looking him up and down. His gaze lingered on the new piercing and he licked his lips as he stared. "Fuck." He leaned in close, kissing Jensen's neck and muttering against his ear. "Wanna take you back in that garage and ruffle your feathers right the fuck now."

 

"Yeah?" Jensen asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

"Yes."

 

"You're gonna have to wait."

 

Jared moved back, biting his lip for a moment. "Don't think I can."

 

"Think you're gonna have to," Jensen told him again, pressing his palm flat against Jared's chest. "So you'd better try and keep yourself under control."

 

Jared just gaped at him, like he couldn't believe that Jensen had the balls to deny him. Jensen felt a slight twitch at the thought, but didn't relent. As much as he wanted to, it would be unfair on Jeff if they both skipped out on the party now and came back all fucked out and exhausted. He wanted to stay awake to see the New Year in with his friends and family. He wanted to kiss Jared at the stroke of midnight and maybe get a little drunk and go to bed at some stupid hour of the morning. He wanted to have Jared fuck him in the small hours of a new day and then just pass out for ten or eleven hours. 

 

Jared still wanted to argue, though. And, Jensen had to admit as he agreed to 'at least a blowjob in the bathroom', he was pretty damned good at it.

 

 

 

 

He'd heard Jeffrey yelling something that probably made even his mom blush as he'd headed upstairs after Jared, but right now it was worth it. He had his hands pressed flat against the tile wall as he leaned the rest of his body away from it, making sure the wings didn't get crushed. Jay was knelt in front of him, his fingers pressing into the backs of Jensen's already weak knees as he sucked down his cock. 

 

"Fuck, Jay... Can't..."

 

Jared let him go, scraping his teeth over Jensen's thigh and looking up at him as he brought one hand round to keep stroking his dick. "Yeah, you can. You gotta. I want to swallow every last drop and then every time I kiss you, all you'll taste is this..." He trailed off, grinning as Jensen moaned and closed his eyes. He let his head tip back, groaning loudly when Jared's mouth closed over him again.

 

When Jared's hand slid up the back of his thigh, he couldn't stop himself. He breathed in sharp and came, coating Jared's throat with it. He could feel him swallowing and whimpered, his fingers sliding down the tile as he tried to collapse on top of the other man. Jared held him up though, keeping him on his feet, and didn't let go until he stopped trembling.


	36. Chapter thirty-four

It didn't matter where he went, Jensen could still feel Jared's eyes on him. Each time he met the man's gaze, he felt a pull in his stomach, a pooling of heat even lower as memories played back of their short time spent in the bathroom only a few hours ago. And even though he didn't want to, Jensen kept his distance from Jared as much as he could -- at least for the time being. 

 

Glancing around the room, Jensen searched for Chris, really just looking for a way to pass the time. And Chris was safe. He found him talking with Jeffrey, who had made himself up to look like a Catholic priest. Stevie had already joked about how she needed to confess her sins. Jared and Jensen had blocked their ears and headed off in the opposite direction at that point. Jensen decided to join Chris and Jeffrey, moving even further away from Jared. On his way over, he heard a cackling sound that he'd not heard in years. He turned, recognizing the laughter as that of his mother. He smiled, seeing her standing at the kitchen island with Stevie, Dani and Trevor. They had a row of shots lined up in front of them, along with a bowl of cut limes and salt shakers. 

 

"Okay, ready?" Dani said. "On three. One, two, _three_."

 

All three women -- maybe four with Trevor there -- used the salt, lime and shots like pros. Donna squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed the alcohol, gasping after and waving her hand in front of her face. "I haven't drank this much in years," she admitted. "Or rather, I haven't drank this much and had this much fun in years."

 

"Well, you're with the Queens of Fun now, sweetheart," Trevor giggled.

 

"And Trevor's the reigning one," Stevie teased. She laughed louder when Trevor lifted his arms up in the air, triumphantly declaring his title. 

 

Nearing them, Jensen reached out to his mother, rubbing her back as he stepped closer. "You guys are having a little too much fun, I think," he teased.

 

"Yeah, see what happens when your father isn't around?" The words were out of Donna's mouth before she could stop them. Quickly, she slapped both hands over her mouth, while Stevie, Dani and Trevor burst out laughing. "I'm so sorry," Donna said to Jensen. "I shouldn't have said that."

 

"You're _right_ , Mom," he smiled. "Don't apologize."

 

"I know," she said. "But I shouldn't be so mean."

 

"Why not? He is to everyone else."

 

"Did it hurt?"

 

He frowned at her, shaking his head. "No, Mom," he said. "I know what kind of guy Dad is."

 

"No," she corrected. "That."

 

He looked to where she was pointing, eyeing the piercing on his chest. "Oh," he said. "Yeah, it hurt."

 

"Then why'd you do it, for God's sake?"

 

Jensen laughed, reached around his mother and grabbed a shot glass off of the table. He downed the liquor in it and then moved along, not wanting to continue the conversation. 

 

"Jensen!" Donna called after him, but he didn't answer. "Well, it was a legitimate question."

 

"You know why he did it, sweetheart," Trevor said. 

 

"I do?"

 

Trevor motioned across the room, to where Jared stood in his doctor's outfit. "Because of that bit of prime real estate."

 

Dani snorted hard, hurting her throat as she laughed. "Ow," she giggled. "That was really lame, Trev."

 

Grinning, Trevor looked over at Dani. "Tell me you wouldn't give that a go," he said, wriggling his perfectly trimmed eyebrows.

 

It was relatively quiet for a moment, the women looking at Dani. "Okay," she admitted. "I would."

 

"See?"

 

"Maybe _with_ Chris, too."

 

The women whooped at the mention of a threesome and poured themselves another round of shots.

 

 

 

 

Everyone wandered outside eventually. Not only for the food that was being grilled out there, but also for the fireworks that would be set off at midnight. Jared had bought a couple of really obnoxious sets, just to piss off the neighbours. They already disliked Jeffrey and Jared, so why not make it fun?

 

On his own, Jensen moved outside to the front of the garage where one of Jeffrey's construction employees was grilling just about everything you could imagine, regardless of the late hour. He talked to the man for a few minutes -- Ronald, his name was -- and then grabbed a beer from the cooler nearby. He shook off his hands, ridding himself of the ice water, and then twisted the cap until the bottle hissed at him. Just as he was about to drink, he heard a soft, low voice speaking to him from behind.

 

"You have avoided me _all_ night," Jared said, leaning in close to him.

 

Jensen paused, smiled slightly and then took a drink of the beer. "I thought it might be a good idea, considering," he replied, turning so that he could look at Jared.

 

"Considering what?" 

 

"You _know_ what considering."

 

"Considering that, after this party, I plan on taking you to bed and making you sweaty and out of breath? Working you hard until about three or four in the morning?" he grinned.

 

Jensen chuckled, his eyes sparkling in the low glow of the party lights. "Ambitious," he winked.

 

Jared slung his arm around Jensen's waist, albeit awkwardly with the giant angel wings still on Jensen's shoulders. "You know I can," he said, leaning in for a kiss.

 

"Yes, I do," he returned, nodding his head as Jared pressed a soft kiss to his mouth.

 

"Not now, save it for later!" Stevie interrupted, smacking Jared's shoulder. "You've got thirty-five minutes, mister."

 

"Tell me you haven't kissed Jeffrey yet," Jared chuckled, watching her get two bottles of beer from the cooler.

 

"I haven't," she replied, her nose lifted into the air. "I've been a good girl."

 

"Yeah," Jensen nodded. "She's spent all of her time, instead, getting drunk."

 

Stevie gasped, pretending to be horrified. "Your mother's the one that started that," she said. "The rest of us just followed along."

 

"Sure, you bunch of sheep."

 

"Baa." And then she was gone, whirling back into the crowd, heading toward the priest that desperately wanted another beer. Jared had to admit, Batgirl never looked so good. Shelby was at her heels, too, her Underdog cape rippling behind her.

 

Jared stayed close to Jensen for the last thirty-five minutes. Trevor joined them for a little while, joking with Jared and flirting with Jensen. Jared laughed when Jensen's face turned red, his ears burning with embarassment, when Trevor said he'd had no idea what a gorgeous body had been hidden underneath the dowdy school uniform. 

 

"I see," Trevor had said. "Keep all the sexy ones for yourself."

 

"Ones?" Jensen asked. "As in plural?"

 

Jared waved away Trevor's words, admitting to Jensen that even if there had been others, there was only him now, and that's all that mattered.

 

When it came time to start the countdown, Jeffrey led the count, and then everyone else joined in. From where Jared and Jensen stood, you could see people pair off, tugging their loved ones closer as the numbers dwindled down to three...two...one...

 

"Happy New Year!" everyone shouted, glasses raised. The champagne that had been passed out by Trevor, Dani and Donna was momentarily forgotten about. Kisses were more important. 

 

Smiling, Jensen looked up at Jared and opened his mouth to a very deep kiss. He didn't care about who would see them, who would think they were freaks, or who would call the cops on them. He returned the kiss with just as much zeal as Jared put into it. He suddenly realized that, with his free hand, he had bunched up Jared's scrub shirt in a fist. He let go of him, backed away from the kiss and clinked his glass to Jared's. 

 

"Happy New Year," he grinned.

 

Jared winked at him. "Happy New Year," he repeated.

 

Before he could swallow the mouthful of champagne he'd taken, Jensen was attacked from behind. He tried to duck, but found an arm wrapped around his shoulders. 

 

"Happy goddamn New Year!" Chris shouted. His other arm was around Dani, and she was just as drunk as he was. 

 

"You guys having a good time?" Jared asked.

 

"Fuck yeah," Chris laughed. "I came over to give my boy a kiss."

 

Jensen laughed, not believing him, but then Chris suddenly let go of Dani, grabbed Jensen's face with both hands, and pressed a big, sloppy kiss to Jensen's mouth. Jensen tried to pretend that he hadn't always wondered what it would be like to kiss Chris. He should have been mortified, especially with Jared standing right there, watching them. Instead, he felt more than just a little turned on. 

 

Dani whooped upon seeing the two men kissing. She squeezed at her boyfriend's backside, not taking her eyes off of them.

 

As Chris backed away, Jensen's face flushed red. He felt bad for having been turned on by the kiss, almost as if he'd cheated on Jared. He saw that he shouldn't have felt that way when he looked up into Jared's eyes. The man's pupils were dilated, his lips parted just slightly. He was turned on too.

 

Clearing his throat, Jensen wiped away the kiss that Chris had given him. "Just, um, let me know when you guys need a ride home, and I'll call the cab for you."

 

"Fan-shmastic!" Chris declared. He put his arm around Dani again and they wandered off into the crowds again.

 

There was silence between Jared and Jensen for several seconds, until Jared leaned in closer. "Can I take you into the garage now?" he asked. "That was hot."

 

"Shut up," Jensen returned. Still, he couldn't help but smile.

 

 

 

 

Jensen was sure his heart was going to stop. He was drenched in sweat, his hair plastered down to his scalp, his skin red in places where Jared had nipped at him or held onto him too hard.

 

Everyone had left the party around two in the morning. They had set off the fireworks one by one, stretching out the fun and games until the last possible minute. The neighbors had called the cops once. The officers showed up, took an unopened beer each offered to them, told Jeffrey to turn down the music just slightly, and left them alone. When the neighbors saw that the cops weren't going to do much more than that, they gave up. Jared had moments of wishing the crowds would disperse right away, and then realizing that he was having a good time -- he would have his way with Jensen soon enough.

 

And that he did.

 

Jensen, turned over onto his stomach, gripped the bedsheets in his hands. His forehead was pressed against the mattress, his moans muffled by the covers. Jared's hips were placed firmly against his, thrusting hard, hands gripping Jensen's waist to keep him relatively steady. 

 

Suddenly, Jensen pushed back against Jared and spoke one word that was almost unintelligible.

 

"What?" Jared asked, out of breath.

 

"I said stop," he repeated.

 

"Why, what's wrong?"

 

"Nothing," he said. He wriggled out from underneath Jared and kissed him, pulling them both up to their knees in the center of the bed. He gripped at Jared's backside, strong fingers dimpling the rounded flesh there. "I want to do it."

 

The words were spoken in a breathy whisper, amidst a kiss. Jared pulled back enough to look down at Jensen, curious, and shook his head. "Do what?"

 

Jensen swallowed hard. He'd already come once -- not including the bathroom incident -- and had surrendered himself to the idea of doing whatever Jared wanted in reward for what he'd gotten. But in record time, Jared had him ready to come again, using Jensen's new peircing to help. Now, he wanted a little something more. "I want to do what you were just doing to me," he admitted.

 

A smile crept across Jared's face. "Oh," he said softly. "Well, I guess I can't stay a virgin forever."

 

Jensen chuckled at him, shaking his head. "I'm not sure you ever were."

 

"I'm admitting nothing right now. Alright," Jared said, crawling up to the head of the bed. "Come on."

 

Jensen followed him, remaining on his knees behind Jared. He had never done anything like this before, of course, but he could easily recall what he liked Jared to do to him. He mimicked the moves, slipping his hands low and letting his fingers find dark spaces and the tight ring of muscle he knew was there. When he found the right place, Jared hissed through his teeth and let his head rock back slightly. Instincitvely, his hips moved with Jensen's movements. 

 

Jensen watched Jared's moves, trying to pretend that he wasn't turned on even just by that. He felt his own cock twitch as he carefully pushed one slick finger deeper. He was encouraged to do more by the sounds escaping Jared's throat. Pushing deep and stroking in an alternating rhythm, Jensen watched Jared's reaction. The man's fingers scrabbled along the garage wall, trying desperately to find purchase, to push back against Jensen, to claw at something that would ground him. Instead, he reached around and set a hand to Jensen's hip, pulling him in closer. 

 

"Now," Jared whispered. "Do it now."

 

It was quiet for a few seconds, only the crinkling sound of the condom package being torn open to be heard. Jensen rolled it on as quickly as he could, added a touch of lube and positioned himself behind Jared again. He wasn't sure of himself at first, but once he'd completely surrounded himself with nothing but Jared, he felt himself become free once again.

 

Jared encouraged him, pushed back against each of Jensen's thrusts so that they moved as a unit, with each other and for each other. He felt Jensen's teeth against his shoulder, reached up to pull the young man's mouth down even harder. The pain, mixed with the pleasure, was enough to send him over the edge. He brought his hands down to his own cock, where Jensen was already stroking him, and helped. He rocked his head back and looked up at the ceiling as he came, shuddering against Jensen and the wall.

 

Jensen felt a change in the ring of muscle. It tightened and relaxed again, pulsing along with Jared's orgasm. He squeezed his eyes shut, feeling his own orgasm creeping closer. He opened his mouth and moaned against the taut skin of Jared's shoulder, and let himself go. He thrust three more times, each one harder than the last, and then stopped, letting the world stop with him. Sounds fused together, and his vision blurred when he opened his eyes again. His hands, sticky from Jared, were clamped down upon Jared's hips as wave after wave of pleasure crashed over him. He breathed hard against Jared's back, sounding ragged and worn. 

 

After a few more seconds, Jensen pulled away from Jared, collapsing upon the bed. Jared went with him, peeling off the condom he'd been wearing and dropped it over the edge of the bed, where the doctor's uniform was resting. He turned and looked at Jensen, watching the man's chest heave as he breathed hard.

 

"You okay?" Jared asked.

 

"Holy crap," Jensen managed. 

 

Jared chuckled, reaching for Jensen's spent cock. He pulled the condom off and let it fall beside his own, where they would sit until probably about noon the next day. When he turned back, he kissed his way up Jensen's belly, sliding his tongue over the nipple piercing.

 

Jensen wriggled slightly, both from a good case of the shivers, and from trying to get away from Jared's exploratory mouth. "Ow," he mumbled.

 

"Won't be sore for much longer," Jared told him, nuzzling Jensen's neck. "I love that you got it though."

 

"Yeah, well, yours are so addictive," he smiled. "I thought it was only fair to fight fire with fire."

 

"Bully," he laughed.

 

Jensen felt Jared's fingers in his hair, pushing the wet locks off of his forehead. He looked up at him, smiling. "I had a really great time tonight," he said. 

 

Jared arched his eyebrows at Jensen. "Night ain't over yet," he reminded him.

 

"Oh, you've got to be kidding m--"

 

Jensen's complaint was cut short by a very passionate kiss. He didn't know if he would be able to come yet again that night, but he knew Jared wouldn't give up without a valiant fight. He didn't mind though.


	37. Chapter thirty-five

"Oh, god, I think I'm still drunk." Stevie flopped onto the chair beside Jeffrey and leant against his side. "Hold me."

 

He put his arm around her and pulled her close, chuckling quietly into her hair. "I did warn you that maybe those last three or four shots weren't a good idea."

 

"Remind me to listen to you in future."

 

They both looked around at the sound of the garage door opening, unsurprised to see that it was Jensen, not Jared, who was wandering into the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and gulped down a few mouthfuls, eyeing Stevie at the table.

 

"You think Mom's as bad as her?" He asked.

 

"I wouldn't try to call and find out, put it that way. What about Jay?"

 

"He's okay. Still asleep."

 

"Figured as much. You enjoyed last night, huh?"

 

Despite the innocence of the question, Jensen still felt himself blush. "Uh, yeah. A lot, thanks."

 

Stevie snickered at that, lifting her head. "I think they had sex," she said, winking at Jensen. "A _lot_ of sex."

 

"Okay, I'm... I'm going now." Jensen headed quickly back to the garage, trying to ignore Stevie's sly laughter and Jeffrey gently telling her to calm down. He climbed back up to his and Jared's bed, getting into the empty side and pulling the covers back over himself. Jared moaned at the movement and the disturbance, and rolled onto his side.

 

"Fuckin' _cold_ ," he told Jensen, before he wrapped his arms and legs around the younger man.

 

"I know. So warm me up."

 

"Mmm. Need a shower first." He cleared his throat, smacked his lips together. "Mouth tastes like roadkill."

 

"Yeah, go brush your teeth too."

 

"Want sleep," Jared argued, and closed his eyes again.

 

 

 

They woke up again at around three in the afternoon. It was Jensen's phone buzzing that woke him and, in turn, it was his rooting around for it that woke Jared.

 

"Tell 'em to fuck off."

 

"I can't. It's Chris. He says that Dani's been up for five hours and still hasn't left the bathroom. She was really trashed, I think."

 

"So was Chris, wasn't he?"

 

"Not as bad. Says she was so trashed she even offered him a blow-job, then passed out before he could take her up on it."

 

"Thank fuck you stayed awake," Jared said, kissing Jensen's shoulder. Then, "Shit, I need to piss."

 

Once Jared was out of sight, Jensen looked again at the second message he had received. It was Chris, asking if they were still cool. Jensen quickly pressed the call button, wanting to reassure him.

 

"Hey," Chris answered.

 

"Why wouldn't we still be okay?" Jensen asked, speaking before Chris had another chance to.

 

"I don't know. Just thought you might be weirded out by that kiss last night, maybe?"

 

"Why, were you?"

 

Chris sighed. "A little. Afterwards, at least, since Dani told me how hot it looked. You know I wasn't being a dick, right? I mean, that wasn't-"

 

"Chris, I know. Really. You don't have to apologize. Not when you're such an awesome kisser, anyways."

 

"Ass."

 

"I'm trying to be serious, but it's so hard with you."

 

"Can we concentrate on the tonsil tennis and not your dick?"

 

" _You're_ a dick," Jensen retorted, laughing when Chris clicked his tongue in answer. "I feel like I should be apologizing for actually enjoying it."

 

"Yeah? Well, I am a fucking awesome kisser, so it's not your fault at all. Look, it's just... It was a little weird to wake up and remember that I kissed my best friend last night. It wouldn't be so bad if you were straight, you know? But you're not, and you already have this amazing boyfriend and I think I must have lucked out and got the world's most understanding girlfriend, even if she did puke all over my bathroom floor. And my feet. So, yeah. It's just kinda worrying. And I hope Jared knows I didn't mean anything by kissing you."

 

"Chris, you were drunk. You kissed everybody that you could lay your hands on."

 

"Huh. Pretty sure you were the only dude."

 

"Only 'cause I'm so ridiculously good-looking."

 

"Ha ha, fuck you. I text to make sure we're cool and all you can do is make fun."

 

"Some friend I am, huh?"

 

"Yeah. Some friend."

 

Jensen rolled his eyes and told Chris that, without any shadow of a doubt, there was nothing he could do that would change the fact that they would always be the very best of friends.

 

"That's good," Chris told him. "'Cause if I ever get drunk and physical again, then you don't have to stop me. Not if you don't want to-"

 

"Goodbye, Chris!" Jensen yelled.

 

Chris was laughing, and Jensen couldn't help but join in as his friend yelled right back at him. "Dammit, bitch, don't holler in my ear like that!"

 

"Sorry, man. I'll see you at school, okay?"

 

Chris responded with a 'Love ya, man' and Jensen just replied, "Back at ya." He hung up as Jared came back into the garage, shutting the door to the house firmly behind him. He heard him shuffling things around downstairs and tugged the covers back up to his chest when Jared made it to the top of the ladder, clutching his video camera against his chest. He saw the 'recording' light was on and threw his hand over his face, groaning. Jared only gave a low laugh as he crawled up the bed above Jensen, pointing the camera right in his face.

 

"What the fuck're you doing?" Jensen asked, his voice muffled by his arm.

 

Jared gripped his wrist and lifted his hand away, tutting when this only made him turn his head away with his eyes firmly closed. "Jensen, look at me. Want to see how sexy you look right now."

 

"'m not sexy," Jensen mumbled. "Dammit Jay, I just woke up again." He cracked one eye open. "Why can't you have a hangover like normal people?"

 

"Because I like to do stuff like this when I wake up, instead."

 

"I thought you were kidding about the home-made porn anyway."

 

Jared tilted his head to one side and then shook it.

 

"You really want to do this? 'Cause it'll end up looking like one of those amateur pieces of crap that you get online."

 

"Relax. I'm not gonna put it on the internet. Besides, you're way prettier than those guys."

 

"Prettier?" Jensen asked, reluctantly looking Jared in the eye. Well. Viewfinder.

 

"Hell, yeah." Jared settled his weight then, aiming the camera down at Jensen's face. "You got those beautiful bedroom eyes, make me want to just fuck you into the mattress soon as I look at you. Then you got all that smooth skin that I just want to kiss all over." Jared's voice was down to a low murmur from behind the camera as he brought one hand down to tug at the collar of Jensen's teeshirt, exposing his throat to stroke his fingertips gently over the skin there. Jensen bit his bottom lip at the tease and the tone of Jared's voice. He couldn't keep his eyes off the camera lens, even when Jared's fingers then brushed over his lips. He opened his mouth, flicking his tongue out against Jared's thumb, smiling when the other man groaned. "Goddamn... I knew it."

 

Jensen stopped. Blinked. "Knew what?"

 

"That this was a good idea. Take your shirt off."

 

Too turned on already to argue, Jensen waited while Jared moved to lay beside him and then he sat up and pulled his teeshirt off. Without waiting to be asked, he also pushed his pyjama pants down his legs and kicked them off underneath the covers. Jared focused the camera on Jensen's face again as he reached across and cupped his chin.

 

"How're you gonna hold the camera and kiss me?" Jensen asked.

 

"I'm not..."

 

Jensen sucked in a breath when Jared's hand moved down to find its mark.

 

"Gonna film your eyes when you come," Jared told him. "Just so you can see."

 

"What makes you think I'll be watching this?"

 

"'Cause of all the other stuff I'm gonna film for you."

 

Jared slid his thumb over the head of Jensen's cock then, made his breath hitch a second time. He let him go long enough to peel the covers from him, pulling them down till they were only covering Jensen's legs up to his thighs.

 

"You cold?" He asked.

 

Jensen shook his head, shivering only when Jared's hand smoothed over his stomach and back down to his dick. He looked down to watch, gritting his teeth when he saw. He could somehow distance himself more when he couldn't see Jared's hand setting a leisurely pace on his dick, but seeing it made him more sensitive to it. Jared only licked his lips at the twitch and the smear of wet that he caught on his thumb.

 

"Fuck," Jensen swore, kind of surprised.

 

Jared moved down then, the camera going with him, and Jensen pressed his head back into the pillows, jaws straining around the yell he didn't want to let out when Jared's mouth slipped warmly over his cock. He felt a cool weight drop onto his stomach and realized that Jared had put the camera down. He picked it up, ignoring the flutter of protest, and aimed it until he could see Jared's mouth working him. One arm was reaching up his body, flat against his skin, and he focused on the tattoos that decorated it, then on Jared's face. His closed eyes, the lashes just stroking his cheekbones. His frown of concentration as he worked his tongue around, down, up and around again.

 

Jensen's hands started to shake and he fought to keep the camera steady.

 

Jared lifted his head enough to tell him to get the camera on his own face, and Jensen didn't even need to warn him. He wasn't ever going to last long, not like this. He held the camera above himself, aimed at his face, which he was sure was bright red and twisted in an ugly way as he gasped out his release. He was swearing, whispering, panting for breath, and he could feel sweat pooling in the hollow of his throat.

 

Kissing his way up Jensen's body, Jared reached up and took the camera away from him, turning it off for now and resting it on the crate that served as a nightstand.

 

"I... I thought..."

 

"Gonna let you recover first," Jared told him, kissing the side of his jaw. "Then it'll be time for scene two."

 

 

 

 

The night of the party, school had seemed plenty far away, but it was only five more days before Jensen was waking up to a six a.m. alarm and doing his best not to disturb Jared on his way to the bathroom. Stevie was already up and eating a quick breakfast of cereal and coffee. Jensen joined her as soon as he was showered and dressed.

 

"Ready to go back?" Jeff asked, when he came down. He dumped a pair of work gloves on the counter and then opened the fridge to study its contents, deciding on breakfast.

 

"Sure," Jensen answered. "Couple more days holiday would always be good, but I think I'm starting to bother Jay."

 

Jeff laughed. "Tire him out, maybe, but I doubt you're bothering him."

 

"Really? I got the impression he wants me out so he can have the place to himself to jerk off to porn in private."

 

"So long as he stays in the garage with it," Stevie said.

 

"Talkin' 'bout me again?" Jared asked, coming into the kitchen. He wore thick wool socks, plaid pyjama bottoms and a baggy grey teeshirt, and Jensen tried to ignore how goddamn attractive he made the outfit look.

 

"Always," Jeff told him. "What're you doing up so early?"

 

"Figured I'd take Jen in on the bike so he doesn't have to go as early as you two. Because I'm a nice guy."

 

"Huh-uh. I'm taking him in."

 

Jared sighed. "You know, it's too early to argue with you, man. Jensen can go with you. I got something to pick up from Harry today." He leant over Jensen's shoulder, holding his weight with one hand against the table. "See ya later," he murmured, smiling when Jensen turned enough to kiss him. He headed out to get changed into his bike gear, and Jeff followed, clearly not done.

 

 

 

 

Jensen caught up with Chris between his first and second class and wrapped an arm around his friend's shoulders to pull him into an awkwardly positioned hug.

 

"Hey, shithead," Chris teased, pulling Jensen across and butting their foreheads together.

 

"Hey, dickface," Jensen responded.

 

"Dickface, huh? Catchy. How was the rest of your holiday?"

 

"Jared took me over to the gym again and filmed me working out."

 

"Oh yeah? That all he filmed?"

 

Jensen reddened slightly. "Not exactly. Don't say 'yes' if he offers to show you his video collection, okay? There are parts of, well, both of us that nobody else should ever see."

 

Chris wrinkled his nose at that. "Got it. No videos."

 

"How about you?"

 

"Oh, I spent most of the last week listening to Dani telling me how hot a threesome would be."

 

"Isn't that every straight guy's wet dream?" Jensen asked, oblivious.

 

"Maybe if she meant with another girl, you know?"

 

"Oh. Huh."

 

"Exactly. I guess another week or two and she'll get the idea out of her head. It's kind of my fault, anyway."

 

"You know what? Let's not talk about that kiss again until I'm telling the story to your kids, agreed?"

 

"Definitely agreed."

 

 

 

 

It was just gone eleven and Jared was bored out of his mind. He'd worked on the Ducati from the moment he'd returned from Harry's, but now the garage felt too warm. He was sweating from the work anyway, but the heaters really didn't help. He turned them off, figuring that if Jensen was cold when he got in then Jared could soon heat him right back up. 

 

Checking his watch, he decided it wasn't too early to go pick up some lunch. There wasn't much in the house that he really felt like eating - he'd checked - and he could do with a beer since after this trip he wasn't planning on going anywhere else. A couple of beers would cool him down and then he could start work again.

 

His mind made up, he grabbed his gloves and jacket and headed outside to his bike.

 

 

 

 

Chemistry was one of the few classes that Jensen and Chris shared in their schedule. They made good lab partners, anyway, both being strong in the other's weaker areas of the subject. Chris was doing the practical work while Jensen made notes when there was a knock at the door and they looked up to see Stevie coming in. She looked pale and immediately Jensen's heart lodged in his throat. He glanced at Chris, found the other man staring back at him with a worried look.

 

Stevie exchanged a couple of words with the teacher and the other students watched her as she made her way to Jensen and Chris's work-space.

 

"What's going on?" Jensen asked, quietly.

 

Stevie was quiet for a second. "Not here. Just... Come on."

 

Jensen got up, picking up his books and cramming them into his bag. He barely heard Chris telling him to call if he needed anything before he was following Stevie outside.

 

"Are you going to tell me what's happened?" He asked again, as they got outside.

 

"I would if I could. I don't know. Shelly got a call from the hospital. She couldn't make a lot of it out, just someone asking for me and needing me to get hold of you."

 

Jensen closed his eyes, stopping where he was. He felt himself sway, and Stevie got a hand on his shoulder. "Jay..."


	38. Chapter thirty-six

  
Author's notes: **Two chapters today!**  
______________________________  
  


* * *

Jensen felt like no matter how fast he walked, no matter how _far_ he walked, the hospital corridor stretched on for eternity. He wanted to reach out his arms and try to grab for anything, _something_ to pull him closer to the Emergency Room, while another part of him wanted to turn tail and run. If it was Jared that was hurt -- and he knew it had to be -- he wasn't sure he could face it. 

 

Shelly, the main office secretary, had said that it sounded like Jeffrey on the phone. But the call cut in and out too much for her to really identify the person talking. She got enough that led her to Stevie and the Saint Elizabeth's emergency room. She had called down to Stevie's room, told her what she'd heard and Stevie asked her to find out where Jensen was. She looked up the young man's schedule, found him in the science lab, and told Stevie to go; she would cover the class until a substitute could be found.

 

The emergency room was nothing like what television made it out to be. Generally, it was quiet. More than likely, it had its bouts of stress and chaos, but in the middle of the day, nothing was going on. The waiting room was nearly dead-silent, which sent a shiver down Jensen's spine. He felt Stevie's hand tighten on his when they saw a familiar figure sitting in a waiting room chair, his back to them. 

 

"Jensen," she said, her voice cracking.

 

Jensen turned to meet her eyes, the furrow creasing his brow permanently, he was sure. He nodded his head at her, swallowing hard. They looked back over to who was sitting in the ER chair, finding him already turned and spying upon them.

 

Jared stood from his seat. He had a dirt bike racing magazine curled into a tube in his hand, the corners of the pages worn and ripped. His eyes were red, but he wouldn't ever admit to having been crying, Jensen knew. He seemed unsure what to do, really, just gazing over at them. He wanted to run to Jensen for comfort, to feel the man's arms holding him tightly. But he also wanted to grab Stevie and hold her close, for it was Jeffrey that was in the operating room right then and there.

 

"He's okay," he finally managed, watching them step closer.

 

"Jared," Stevie said. She hadn’t realized she had found the ability to walk again, but found herself near him. She made his mind up for him and nearly yanked him closer, clinging to him. "Are you alright?"

 

"Yeah," he said into her hair. "I am."

 

She pulled away from him to look up into his eyes. "What happened?" she asked. "I got a call that said there'd been an accident."

 

"Who called you?"

 

"I don't know, they called the office," she said. "Shelly said the call kept cutting in and out. What's going on, where is Jeff?"

 

"He's back there," Jared returned, nodding towards the swinging doors that closed off the ER to the waiting room. "The doctor was out once already. He's pretty banged up, and they think his leg is broken in three places."

 

"Oh, my God," she breathed.

 

"But they think he's going to be okay," he continued. He squeezed at her shoulders, making sure she was listening to him. When she nodded, he loosened his grip on her. "He had a pretty deep cut on his head, they said, so they're checking him out for a concussion and stuff. I don't know how they're going to set the leg."

 

"They'll probably have to do surgery," Jensen interjected. "With it broken in three places..."

 

" _How_?" Stevie asked. "I mean... How?"

 

Jared nodded. "A guy was talking on his cell phone, not paying attention and crossed over the median," he explained. "He hit Jeff head-on."

 

Stevie lost the strength in her legs. "Oh, God," she whispered as she was guided down to a chair. She felt Jared's arm around her, holding her up, and Jensen's hand rubbing at her back, trying to comfort her. Right then, however, the only comfort she wanted to get was from Jeffrey. She wanted to see his smiling eyes and hear his raucous laughter. She knew she loved him, and the accident proved to her that she couldn't live without him. She needed him. 

 

 

 

 

The rest of the afternoon was spent sitting in the waiting room, punctuated by occasional runs to the cafeteria or the coffee machine on the third floor -- the only one that really worked. Since Jensen and Stevie had been pulled out of school for the emergency, they'd both missed lunch. Stevie swore she couldn't eat, but when they returned with a sandwich and chips, she ate most of what they had gotten for her. Since he had the most medical knowledge any questions were fielded to Jensen. He answered as clearly and concisely as he could, without trying to cause undue stress and worry. 

 

Time seemed to both slow and fly. They had lost track of the hours, and when they did the math, it seemed impossible. Jared took off a number of times, tracking down someone that could tell him what was going on. It was rare that he came back without some sort of news, even if it was made up, just to settle Stevie's nerves.

 

By the time a doctor emerged to see them, Stevie had fallen asleep in one of the uncomfortable waiting room chairs. She was on her feet in a flash, however, asking how Jeffrey was before the doctor could even explain.

 

"He's doing fine," he smiled, raising a hand to calm her. "He's resting in the recovery room right now. We had to go in and put a couple of titanium pins in his left leg. That side took the most damage."

 

"Oh, my God," she whimpered.

 

"No, no," the doctor said. "That's a good thing. They'll keep his leg straight and help his bone to fuse back together. He has a laceration on his head that we stapled back together. He has a couple bruised ribs, and some glass fragments had to be removed from a couple spots on his face, but overall, he's a very lucky man."

 

"When can we see him?" Jared asked, his arm around Stevie's shoulders.

 

"Soon," the doctor said to him. "Give him time to wake up and get oriented, and then we'll let you in to see him."

 

"Thank you, doctor," Stevie called as the man turned to go. She watched him smile and nod, and then head back into the ER. Strength sapped, Stevie sat down in her chair again, cradling her head in her hands. 

 

"He's okay," Jensen said to her, rubbing at her back again.

 

"Jeff's too much of a rotten bastard to leave us anyway," Jared chuckled.

 

She didn't think she felt like laughing, so when she heard her own giggle, it surprised her. She looked over at Jared, and then to Jensen. She opened her arms and pulled both boys closer to her. They were her support team, and she wanted to let them know that they were making a damn good job of it.

 

 

 

 

The room was semi-private, but no other patient was currently slotted in Bed 2 in Jeffrey's room. Thankful for the privacy they had together, Stevie coaxed the nurses into letting Jared and Jensen come in with her. She wanted to see Jeffrey, but she wasn't sure what the sight of him, broken and battered in a hospital bed, would do to her. She went into the room first, and her breath caught in her throat. Jared and Jensen filed in behind her and they all stood at a distance, staring.

 

Jeffrey was on oxygen. "Just a precaution," the nurses had said. "His breathing is shallow, and it sets off one of the monitors we have on him. We don't want it to keep waking him up, so we've put the O2 on him."

 

His forehead was bruised and pock-marked with little red cuts where glass had imbedded into his skin. His beard-stubbled face was pale, and his hair was a mess. They hadn't shaved his head to staple closed the cut on his head, so that contributed to the tousled look. Stevie could see, just barely, a bruise on his shoulder where the seat belt strap -- one that he had installed himself in the old muscle car -- had nearly cut into him. She knew that, underneath the hospital gown, his ribs were wrapped, and underneath the blankets, his leg was probably a mess. 

 

Nearing the bed, she reached for him, uncovering his left foot. She saw a white plastic covering that started at his toes and, upon further inspection, ran the length of his leg. Through it, air hissed constantly. "What's this for?" she asked, panic lacing her voice.

 

"It's to keep blood flowing," Jensen told her. "They don't want a clot."

 

"Oh."

 

"Here, Stevie," Jared said. There was a chair standing by the wall; he moved it closer to her. When she was seated, he moved over to Jensen, standing behind him, and lacing his arms around the young man's waist. He rested his chin on Jensen's shoulder and sighed. 

 

Earlier that morning, Jared had been up with Jensen. Harry had called the previous night, to tell Jared that parts for one of Eric's bikes -- another Ducati -- had come in. It was the last bike he had to fix as payment for Jensen's ink. Jared wanted to get working on the bike and finish it up for the tattooist, so he told Harry he would be in first thing to get the parts. 

 

"Jay," Jeffrey had said in a stern voice, "it's the middle of fucking January."

 

"And?"

 

"Don't ride your damn bike."

 

"Why not?"

 

"Because, genius," Jeffrey had continued, "the roads were icy last night."

 

"It's morning."

 

"It's cold."

 

"Jeff, I'll be fine."

 

"Jared, the bike isn't safe."

 

Jared had sighed, put on his helmet and waved to his adoptive father. 

 

"I'm taking Jensen!" Jeffrey had called over the sound of the garage door opening. He watched Jared nod his head and start the motorcycle, revving the engine a couple of times before rolling out of the garage and into the street. 

 

Jared knew, without even looking, that Jeffrey was shaking his head, a stern look on his face that said, "You’ll see. When you spill the bike, you'll come tell me that I was right."

 

Standing there in the hospital room, Jared wished that he could tell Jeffrey just that. For some reason, he believed that it should be him there lying in the bed. Jeffrey should be able to come into the room and say, "See, kid? Listen to your old man next time."

 

As if reading his thoughts, Jeffrey's eyes fluttered open. Stevie couldn't have stopped the flow of tears if she'd been threatened with her own mortality. Almost instantly, Jeffrey's gaze landed on her. He moved the mask with the oxygen away from his mouth, then smiled and weakly reached for her, the heart monitor closed around his index finger. "Hey, baby," he greeted in a very hoarse voice.

 

"You big _jerk_ ," she said tearfully, taking hold of his hand. "It's a good thing you're laying down, 'cause I have half a mind to kick your ass."

 

He chuckled, winced in pain, and looked at her again. "I'm sorry I scared you," he apologized. "Wasn't on my to-do list today."

 

"What _happened_?"

 

Slowly, he shook his head, eyes blinking heavily. "Don't remember much, baby," he told her. "It was just an accident." 

 

She jumped to her feet and put her arms around him, mindful of his bruised ribs and stapled head. She kissed his neck, his cheek, and then his mouth, whispering to him how much she loved him. He didn't verbally return the sentiment. Instead, he met her eyes, his own sparkling, and smiled at her. He saw Jared and Jensen at the foot of his bed and grinned down at them. 

 

"Get over here, you little punk," he said.

 

Jared let go of Jensen and moved around the other side of the hospital bed. He leaned down to give Jeffrey a hug, but before he did, he winked at him. "You're right," he said. "The bike was way more dangerous than the car."

 

"Shut up," Jeffrey snapped, albeit lovingly. "I might be busted up, but I can still kick your ass. Give your old man a hug."

 

Jared finally did as was asked of him. At the back of his head, he felt Jeffrey's fingers curl into a fist, forcibly holding Jared there for a little longer than usual. Not that he really had to. Jared had never pulled out of an embrace from Jeffrey. Let go, Jared looked down at Jeffrey and smiled. 

 

"Don't do that again," he told him.

 

Jeffrey nodded. "Noted." As Jared backed away, Jeffrey's gaze fell to Jensen. "Don't think you're getting out of this that easy, Jensen."

 

Smiling, Jensen shook his head. "No, sir," he said. He watched Jeffrey wave him closer and then took Jared's place by the bed. He leaned down and gave Jeffrey a hug, receiving one back just as Jared had. He was made to stay in the embrace for a little longer than usual, and then set free.

 

"Now get out," Jeffrey declared. "I need to talk to my girl."

 

"Hey," Jared complained. "You were just in a damn car accident. We should get to visit you for a few minutes."

 

"Jared, we have some things to figure out."

 

"Like what?"

 

Jeffrey almost sighed. "Like what the hell we're going to do about money," he said. "I only have so many sick days left, kiddo."

 

" _I'll_ get a job." 

 

He shook his head. "We've already been down that road," he refused. "Ain't no garage that has job openings right now."

 

Jared shrugged his shoulders. "I'll talk to Rock," he offered. "Bartend."

 

"Oh, Jesus."

 

"What, you think I can't pour a goddamn drink?"

 

"It depends on how many you're drinking while you try."

 

"Oh, shut up," he said with a smile.

 

"We'll figure out something, Jeff," Jensen interrupted.

 

"Yeah, let's not worry about money right now," Stevie agreed. "Let's just get you home and feeling better first."

 

Jeffrey gave in, taking somewhat of a deep breath, wincing at his bruised ribs and then softly sighed. "Alright," he agreed. "But I still want you out. I need to talk to Stevie alone."

 

Jared still wouldn't give in. "We're a _family_ , Jeffrey."

 

Jeffrey's heart swelled with love. It was going to be a while before he was even close to good old Jeff. He knew there was lots of healing, lots of physical therapy, and lots of time before that happened. He was going to need his family more than ever during all of that. "Yes, we are, kid," he agreed. "I'm glad you finally see it that way. And right now the Ma and Pa part of the family need to talk."

 

"So talk."

 

"We're going to talk about sex and how much we adore each other."

 

"I'm outta here," Jared declared. He grabbed hold of Jensen's hand and pulled him out of the room with him. 

 

"'Bye!" Jensen called before he was yanked out of the room.

 

When they were gone, and the door had swung closed, Stevie looked over at Jeffrey. She wanted to set a hand to his forehead, brush his tousled hair back from his face, but she didn't, afraid that she would cause more pain. Instead, she brought his hand to her face and kissed his palm.

 

"Hey," he smiled. He patted the right side of the bed. "Come up here."

 

"No," she refused. "I'm fine here."

 

"I ain't gonna break," he told her.

 

"I beg to _differ_ ," she laughed.

 

He patted the bed again. "Come on," he encouraged. "Please?"

 

Reluctantly, Stevie gave in. She moved around to the opposite side of the bed and gingerly crawled up onto the mattress with him. He put his arm around her and held her close, his cheek rested against the top of her head. "Do me a favor?"

 

She propped herself up on an elbow, looking over at him. "I'm sorry, am I hurting you?" she asked.

 

"No," he replied, shaking his head. "Do you think...?”

 

She waited for him to continue, but he didn't. "Do I think what?" she asked.

 

He smiled. "Do you think you could marry me, maybe?"

 

It took a moment for her smile to emerge, but when it did, it was bright enough to light up the room. She nodded her head and giggled softly. "Maybe."


	39. Chapter thirty-seven

That weekend, while Jensen, Chris and Jensen’s mom helped Stevie move the rest of her stuff from her house to Jeffrey’s so that she could cancel her rent payments and all her other bills, Jared went out to Mickey’s and spoke to Rock about the possibility of working for him. Rock had heard about Jeff already and said he was sorry for the old man, really he was, but he already had three other bar-staff and he didn’t need, nor could he afford, anyone else. Jared didn’t argue. Pleading wasn’t his style. He just left quietly, hopped back on his bike, and rode back into town, wondering what the hell to do now.

 

He tried a few other bars, but nobody else was hiring. Or, more specifically, nobody else was wanting to hire him. He tried the next step down after that and headed to a diner, asking if he could maybe bus tables or something. The manager took one look at him and sneered.

 

“Try McDonald’s,” he said. “I hear they hire anyone.”

 

“Thanks a goddamn bunch, asshole,” Jared growled, and left. He was desperate, though, and he doubted the guy would ever find out if Jared took the advice. There were two branches of McDonald’s in town, and he headed to the one closest to Jensen’s school. A sign on the door told him they were hiring someone to work the tills, no experience needed. He pushed the door open and headed inside, feeling a pang of hunger at the first smell of grease and grilled beef.

 

With his helmet in his hands and the most honest expression he could muster, he asked to speak to the manager about the job.

 

An hour later, he’d been hired. He was told to come back on Monday morning, first thing, cleaned up and ready for his orientation training. He didn’t know what the hell kind of orientation a McDonald’s employee needed, since as far as he could see the staff seemed to be made up of pre-teens and idiots, but he didn’t say anything. His tongue was going to need surgery, he thought, for all the biting it that he would be doing.

 

 

 

 

When he got home, Jared helped Stevie find a place for all the stuff she had brought over, moving one of the bikes from the garage to the backyard and covering it with a tarpaulin to make more room for storage. He didn’t tell her about where his job was, just that he had one and it’d probably be minimum wage, but it’d help. Stevie hugged him and thanked him, telling him Jeff was real pleased that he was stepping up.

 

“He didn’t think I had it in me, huh?”

 

“I’m sure that’s not what he meant,” Stevie chided. “He knows what you’re capable of, he’s just glad you’re realizing it too.”

 

“Are we going to go visit him tonight?”

 

“Of course we can. Right after dinner. Doc said yesterday that they can let him come home Monday, but he’ll need to go in to the hospital most days for physical therapy. Thinks he’ll be off work for a good couple of months, at the very least. Probably longer, depending.”

 

Jared grimaced, turning away so Stevie wouldn’t see it. Two whole months serving burgers to spotty youths wasn’t exactly his idea of a good time, but he’d promised Jeff and he wasn’t about to back down from it. He kissed the back of Jensen’s head as he passed him and then took his place at the table, his stomach growling when Stevie lifted the cover off the big pot in the center.

 

“Hungry?” She asked, smiling.

 

“Yeah. All that job-hunting, you know? Gives a guy an appetite.”

 

“Good, dig in then. There’s plenty.”

 

Jared did exactly as he was told, starting when he felt something warm brush his leg. He looked over at Jensen, but the younger man was serving out his own food and completely oblivious. 

 

Then something under the table meowed and Jared quickly scooted his chair back. “What the hell?”

 

“Oh, right. I forgot. I picked my cat up today and brought her over too. She’s been staying with a friend while I was… Y’know. Always over here. I didn’t want to bring her over before in case she and Shelby didn’t get on, but, well, they seem to be fine.”

 

“Huh,” was all Jared could say, and he reached down and let the cat rub its head against his fingers. “She’s…”

 

“Cute,” Jensen finished. “You should see her with Shelby.”

 

“Anything else I should know about?” Jared asked. “Like more animals?”

 

“Just her,” Stevie answered. “You’re not allergic, are you?”

 

“I don’t think so. Guess we’ll find out.” Jared gently pushed the cat away from his ankles and turned his attention back to his meal.

 

 

 

 

When they returned from the hospital it was already getting late. Stevie paid the cab driver and followed the boys inside, turning on the lounge lights as she went by. “Are you guys going out tonight?” 

 

Jensen shrugged. “I should get my homework done,” he answered.

 

“It’s Saturday night, Jen, you should be going out.”

 

“And you’re a teacher?” Jared asked. “Such a bad influence.”

 

“Well I don’t want to see you miss out on nights out with your friends. And I’m sure your mom wouldn’t want that either.”

 

“I guess not. Jay?”

 

“Sure. Call Chris, see if he’ll pick us up. Guy’s night out.” At the look on Jensen’s face, Jared rolled his eyes. “Dude, I’m not taking you out on the bike. Not even the Harley. It’s too icy out for passengers.”

 

“Chris is probably out with Dani.”

 

“Then I guess we’re staying in, since anywhere that I’d want to go is too far to walk and I can’t afford to spring for a cab.”

 

Jensen smirked. “Hell, why didn’t you just say you want to have sex?”

 

“Okay, I really, _really_ want to have sex with you. Right now.”

 

Jared laughed when Stevie stuck her fingers in her ears and shook her head at them both. “Are you two done?”

 

Jensen took a gentle hold of her arms and moved them back down. “We’re done. Just turn the TV up nice and loud.” 

 

“Uh huh. Thanks for the warning. Go on, go have fun. I’ll be fine, on my own.”

 

“Glad to hear it,” Jared laughed, tugging on Jensen’s sleeve until the younger man stumbled after him into the garage. He shut the door behind them, to minimise the chances of Stevie being disturbed by them. As soon as it was shut, Jensen found himself pushed up against it, Jared’s hands fisting together in his hair as he started in on his mouth. By the time he finally stepped back a little, they were both gasping for breath. “Fucking love kissing you,” Jared told him.

 

“I noticed.” Jensen slid his fingers underneath Jared’s shirt, held onto him with a gentle grip. “So where’d you find someone that would pay you money to fuck up their business?”

 

“Hmm. No.”

 

“No? What do you mean, no?”

 

“I mean, no, I ain’t tellin’ you. If I tell you, you’re gonna laugh and tell me I’m an idiot.”

 

“No I’m not.”

 

“Yeah, you are.”

 

“Jared…” Jensen reached up, pulling Jared down so he could run his tongue over his boyfriend’s lips. “Just tell me.”

 

“Fine. I got a job on the tills at Mac-D’s.”

 

“You’re kidding.”

 

“See? I knew you’d be a jerk about it!” Jared stepped away, headed for the couch in front of his old TV and flopped down onto the cushions. Jensen pushed away from the door and followed, draping himself over the back of the couch and kissing Jared’s ear.

 

“I’m not being a jerk. I’m just trying to imagine you in that uniform, being polite to people.”

 

“You been to McDonald’s recently? Ain’t nobody there even knows what the word polite means. They all look like they’d rather be sat at home with their fingers up their asses, playing video games.”

 

“You’ll fit right in then, huh?” Jensen teased. He yelped when Jared reached around and got an arm around his neck. Jared twisted and pulled Jensen over the back of the couch easily, laying him down on it and putting a knee against his crotch to stop him sitting back up. “You gonna beat some sense into me?” Jensen breathed.

 

“That’s not even funny,” Jared told him. “You know I wouldn’t hurt you.”

 

Jensen felt his cheeks flush and looked away, wishing he’d kept his mouth shut. Jared moved his knee anyway and then eased himself down until his body was flush with Jensen’s. He kissed him softly, showing him it was already forgotten about, and Jensen felt himself relaxing again. The touch of his mouth was gentle, careful, and Jensen wondered if he was doing it on purpose now to prove a point. He liked it, though. It was a change from rough, from feeling like they were kissing as though the world was going to end. 

 

He drew his legs up around Jared’s, pushing up against him, and caught the moan that tumbled from the other man’s lips. It felt like an effort to stop when Jared told him to, but he did, and then shivered as his jeans were unfastened and warm fingers stretched out under the elastic of his shorts.

 

“Not gonna film it this time?” Jensen asked, looking down as Jared pushed up away from him and made a fist around his cock.

 

Jared grinned, sly and easy, and shook his head. “Not this time.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Monday morning, Chris picked Jensen and Stevie up early. Since Jeff’s car had been wrecked, he’d been leaving earlier than normal so he could pick them up and get them to school on time each day. Stevie made him accept gas money that morning and told him that once she’d got Jeff home she would be trying to sort out hiring a car for a while so that she wouldn’t have to keep relying on him.

 

Jared said he didn’t need a lift with them, catching Jensen’s smirk and stopping him with a quick glare. He said he’d take his bike, and yes, he would be very careful, and that he’d see them after school was finished. Stevie wished him luck for his first day and Jensen opened the window so Jared could lean through it and quickly kiss him.

 

“Try not to kill anyone,” Jensen told him.

 

“I’ll try. Ain’t making any promises, though.”

 

“Try real hard then. Jay?”

 

Jared leaned in closer, frowning when Jensen reached around and took hold of the hair at the back of his neck. Jensen pulled him in, kissed him slowly, and ignored the comments from the driver’s side. He turned his head and whispered in Jared’s ear that he loved him. Then he let go and settled back in his seat, keeping his eyes on Jared until Chris set the truck moving.

 

Wondering what the hell that had been about, Jared dug into his jacket pocket for his bike keys and headed over to it, swinging a leg over and getting comfy.

 

He arrived at work ten minutes early and found a spot in the staff parking lot at the rear of the building. There was a greasy-haired adolescent stood outside the open back door, a cigarette held firmly between her lips. As he walked up, she plucked it out of her mouth and flicked the ash behind her.

 

“Hi.”

 

“Hey, there.”

 

“You’re the new guy, right?”

 

“Obviously.”

 

“I’m Sabrina. Shift manager’s through there.”

 

“Okay. Thanks, Sabrina, I’m sure I’d have had real trouble finding him without your help.”

 

The sarcasm was lost on her; he could see it just from her eyes. She smiled and nodded and went back to smoking her cigarette and he resisted the urge to grab it out of her fingers and stub it out with his boot. Instead he carried on to the office that he’d been told to report to and knocked on the door before going straight in.

 

“Hey, Jared Padalecki,” he introduced himself, sighing when the guy behind the desk just waved a hand at him to sit down and didn’t even look up as he did so. He was scrawling something on a notepad and only when he was done did he bother acknowledging Jared was there.

 

“My name’s Paul, I’m the guy responsible for training you. I’m who you come to with any questions. Do you have any questions yet?”

 

“I.. Uh. I just walked in the door like three minutes ago, so not really.”

 

“Okay, wiseass. Go find a uniform, Sabrina will help you with that, and then meet me out front and I’ll run you through the tills while we’re quiet. After that you’ll be on your own, but you’ll have Cass with you in case you run into trouble. You get a lunch break after the first five hours. Half an hour, you take it in the staff-room, and once the half hour is up you work till your shift finishes. Since you’re on middle shift this week, you finish at five. Got any questions now?”

 

Jared shook his head. “Huh-uh.”

 

Ten minutes later he was stood behind the tills in a uniform that had been designed for someone about four inches shorter than he was, trying not to look at anyone who came in. They were staring at him while they ordered, he knew that, and he was doing his best to ignore it. The short-sleeved shirt of the uniform showed off the majority of his tattoos and he really didn’t look like the kind of loser that he thought belonged here. Paul spent three quarters of an hour with him, going through all the possible button combinations that he would need to know, and by the time he left Jared wondered what the hell qualifications someone needed to manage a burger joint. He was pretty sure Jensen was smart enough to run the damned district, judging by what he’d seen so far.

 

Cass, at least, seemed to possess some sense. She watched over Jared’s elbow the first couple of times he served someone, and told him he was doing a good job. 

 

It wasn’t going to last.

 

 

 

 

When it happened it was about fifteen minutes before he was due to go for his lunch. He knew the guy was going to be a dick the moment he saw him come in. He had a kid hanging off one hand and dragged her to the counter, his wife or girlfriend or goddamn sister, Jared had no idea, trailing behind him.

 

“Hi, welcome to McDonald’s, what can I get you, sir?” Cass asked, her smile bright.

 

“I just got in the fuckin’ door,” the guy answered. “So give me a fuckin’ minute, darling.”

 

Jared saw Cass mouthing, ‘o-kay’, and he took a step towards her. “Sorry, sir.”

 

“Yeah, you damned well should be. You never get the fuckin’ order right in this shithole anyway, so let me think of something simple for you.”

 

“There a problem?” Jared asked, unable to listen to the guy’s attitude any more. His question went ignored, though, and he leant over the counter to repeat it in spite of Cass having a hand on his arm and trying to pull him back.

 

“There ain’t a problem if this bitch can get the order right.”

 

“You know what, pal? She don’t have to serve you, so why don’t you take your white trash ass and get the fuck out of here.”

 

He saw what the guy was going to do before he did it, and in a flash he had his hand up to catch the fist that had been aimed at him. He twisted, his eyes hard as the guy screeched in pain.

 

“You little asshole!”

 

Now Cass dug her fingernails into Jared’s skin and pulled harder, making him take a step back. “What?”

 

“We do have to serve him, Jared, so just let it go before you get fired, okay?”

 

“You better listen to the little lady,” the man sneered, still smarting from Jared’s physical response.

 

Jared huffed out a sigh and turned to go, heading through the kitchen towards the staffroom. He was just past the fryers when he heard the nasty laugh, and he looked around, slow, his eyes narrowed.

 

“You look like a fuckin’ idiot,” the guy told him, pointing at his too-short work pants and smiling nastily.

 

“You’ll look like a fucked-up idiot if you don’t shut up,” Jared said, voice low and dangerous. He saw Cass waving at him, her eyes wide, and didn’t need to look around to know that Paul had finally ventured out of his office to see what the commotion was about. He turned to face him, ripping the baseball cap off his head and throwing it onto the counter. “Save your breath, prick. I’m goin’.”

 

He ignored them all as he headed to the staff-room and opened the locker that he’d had for about four and a half hours to take out all his stuff. He stripped out of the pants and lobbed them into the corner of the room, not caring where they landed. Once he was dressed in his own gear again he went straight out the back door without bothering to look back.


	40. Chapter thirty-eight

  
Author's notes: Two chapters!  
______________________________  
  


* * *

The door slammed up against the back wall. A chunk of crumbling brick skittered down the broken wall, coming to rest on the cold ground. Jared swore, supposing that he was going to get a notice in the mail about that. Nothing like having to reimburse a company for vandalism on your first day. Swearing under his breath, Jared shoved at the door again, taking his frustrations out on it, rather than the guy back in the dining room. The belly of his shirt caught on the safety door handle, and tore as the door bounced back against the brick wall again. 

 

Looking down at his shirt, Jared sighed, his head rocking back towards the sky for a moment. "Goddammit," he grumbled.

 

"Hey there, gorgeous."

 

Head snapping around, Jared looked to see who was there. His eyes widened for a second. He closed the door a little too hard and moved towards the intruder. "What the fuck are you doing here?"

 

Jensen smiled and opened his arms wide. His perfectly pressed and unwrinkled uniform was slashed in half diagonally by the black strap to his knapsack, where all of his school work sat waiting to be marked. "What?" he asked. "I can't say hello to you at work?"

 

Pointing an angry finger at him, Jared glared. He swung his leg over the motorcycle and reached for his helmet. "You're here to mock me, Jen," he snarled. "I know it."

 

Jensen put his hands down, stepping closer to the bike. "Alright, maybe a little," he agreed. "But I see that the day's ended a little early."

 

"I could say the same for you."

 

He shrugged. "Playin' hooky."

 

Smiling slightly, Jared shook his head at him. He couldn't be mad at him. Hell, Jensen was employing some of the lessons Jared taught him. "I don't know what sort of bad influences you've had on your life, mister," he said. "But don't think that this is going to become a habit."

 

Jensen eyed the tear in Jared's shirt. It was just wide enough to show him the lines of ink, shadow of muscle, and the glow of tanned skin underneath. He reached out, slipping his hand inside to touch the warm softness. As he did, he leaned down and kissed Jared, making his intentions obvious.

 

When Jensen finally backed away, Jared looked up at him. Jensen's eyes were darker than they had been, and the pulse in his throat was quicker. Jared could see the artery throbbing underneath the skin. He smiled, shaking his head. "Jeff's home."

 

"I know," he returned.

 

Maybe the day really was going to end well. "Get on the bike, bad boy," he teased. "I got an idea."

 

"Yes, sir," Jensen nodded. He swung up onto the bike behind Jared, snagging the second helmet there. Neither of them fastened the chin straps, too rushed to worry about safety. Jared drove fast, but this time it wasn't just to toy with danger. This time, it was because his heart was beating fast. Jensen's hands were underneath the leather jacket he wore, underneath the torn shirt, stroking soft skin and lines of hard muscle, fingers dipping below his belt further and further each time. 

 

He parked the bike, the sudden stop rather jarring. Jensen laughed and got off the bike, pulling the helmet off. "I'll go in," he said. "You're not fit to be seen in public right now."

 

"This is an hourly motel, Jen," he replied with a devilish grin. "I'm pretty sure Mrs Tomiko is used to people walking in there with a hard-on."

 

Jensen just laughed, dug into his back pocket for his wallet, and headed into the office. Jared watched him, knowing very well that Jensen was oblivious to how even the simplest movements he made were graceful and alluring. When he emerged, Jared smiled, watching the young man dangle a key at him, a heavy plastic pendant hanging from it. 

 

"Room twenty-three," he declared.

 

"Hey, what d'you know," Jared chuckled. He flipped up the kickstand on the motorbike and revved the engine.

 

Jensen pulled himself up onto the back of the bike, using Jared for balance. "What?" 

 

"Precisely the age I'm going to finally let you out of there," he teased. "Providing you can still walk."

 

There weren't many other cars there. If there were, they were doing exactly the same thing that Jared and Jensen had on their own agenda. Jared took the key and set to unlocking the door. He felt Jensen's arms curl around him, the young man's chin pressed up against his back. As he unlocked the door, Jensen popped the button on Jared's jeans and slowly slid down the zipper, chuckling when Jared cursed at the stuck lock. Finally, the door gave, and they stepped over the threshold.

 

Jared let Jensen push him back up against the closed door. Blindly, he reached over and locked it, making sure to set the safety bar as well. Once that was done, he concentrated on Jensen's kiss, his fingers curling into the man's short-cropped hair. He smelled like McDonald's grease -- could feel it on his skin, too, but Jensen didn't seem to notice. Or, if he did, he didn't care. Jared pulled at the knapsack shoulder strap until Jensen backed off enough to wiggle out from underneath it. His school work was tossed to the floor, forgotten about, quickly followed by Jared's leather jacket. 

 

Pulling out of the kiss, Jensen locked eyes with Jared. They gazed at each other for a few seconds. When Jared tried to lean in for another kiss, Jensen backed away just enough to stay out of reach. As he looked at Jared, he inched the man's jeans down lower on his hips. Without a word, nor another kiss, Jensen went down to his knees. Jared watched him, barely aware of his chest rising and falling from his labored breath. He saw Jensen push at the torn teeshirt and quickly yanked it over his head, tossing it to the floor.

 

He already felt just about to go mad, so when Jensen's mouth closed around his cock, he couldn't help but groan and lean his head back, thumping it against the door. Jensen knew what he needed and wanted, and worked fast and hard, not wasting any time. Jared looked down at him, noticing a thin white film already coating Jensen's tongue. His breath shuddered out of him as he watched, his hands resting atop the young man's head. He twisted his back, arching his spine, and willed himself to hold back just a little longer. Jensen had learned too well, however, what could set Jared off in a heartbeat and when Jared felt a strong suckling pull against his cock, he cried out. Jensen repeated his movements, and with a few more strokes, a few passes of the flat of his tongue over sensitive skin, Jared finally came. Jensen didn't stop, didn't let go of Jared until the man's knees gave out and he slid down to the floor, his skin sticking to the painted wood from the layer of sweat that had quickly gathered along his spine.

 

Sitting down on the floor, Jensen smiled over at Jared. 

 

After a few deep breaths, Jared followed Jensen's lead and wasted no time. He reached for him, taking Jensen's face in his hands and kissing him almost brutally. Jensen was sure his mouth would be bruised later, but it felt so right at the time. He felt Jared pull at the uniform jacket he wore. Awkwardly, he helped Jared with taking it off, blindly throwing it aside. He was pushed backwards, made to stretch out on his back. Jared hovered over him in a kiss, straddling Jensen's body. 

 

Nimble fingers made quick work of the buttons on Jensen's uniform shirt. He nibbled at Jensen's neck for just a moment before pushing the shirt wide open and bringing his mouth down to Jensen's pierced nipple. His tongue wet the skin just before he gave it a hard, sucking tug. He was rewarded by a sharp hiss through Jensen's teeth. The piercing was still a little sore, but it had been well worth it; Jensen had already admitted that. Slipping his tongue around the bar in short, wet circles, Jared felt Jensen's fingers rake through his hair, stopping to gently grasp two fistfuls of the dark, wavy locks. 

 

Pulling himself up, Jared supported the bulk of his weight on one arm. He hovered high over Jensen, and with his free hand, he reached down to the young man's uniform khakis. He expertly unbuckled his belt and worked the pants open. Jensen finally helped, keeping his eyes locked to Jared's. He lifted his hips and let the pants be worked down just enough for skin to be bared. Jared glanced down just once to make sure they were both clear of any biting zippers and then rested his hips against Jensen's. He lowered himself down to his elbows and kissed Jensen again. He worked his hips against Jensen's, grinding just enough to create blissful friction. 

 

They had the room for two hours. Jared planned on making use of every minute.

 

 

 

 

 

Startled awake, Jared sat up. He was confused for a minute. He looked around the room, trying to get his bearings. The motel bed, with its gaudy, cheap bedspread, was untouched. Clothes were strewn around the floor, his skin was sticky, his muscles weak from strain, and lying next to him on the floor was a gorgeous naked man. 

 

_Oh, yeah._

 

The pounding knock that had startled him awake came again, louder this time. "Hey, mister!"

 

"Yeah," he said. His voice was thick with sleep and something else. "What?"

 

"You past time! You and lady muss to go now!"

 

Sitting on the floor, Jared chuckled and looked at Jensen, still sound asleep. "Yeah," he said. "Okay."

 

As if just to get her point across, Mrs. Tomiko opened the door as far as the safety bar would allow. "You get out now!"

 

"Oh- _kay_!" Jared bellowed back. "Jesus Christ, alright!"

 

"What the hell is going on?" Jensen asked, his eyes finally opening.

 

"Me and lady muss to go _now_ ," Jared mocked. He smacked Jensen's naked backside, ignoring the voiced protest. "You get crows on! You move fassah!"

 

Jensen couldn't help but laugh at Jared's screeches. Still lying down, he put on his boxer briefs and pants, zipping them up and fastening the belt. "How long have we slept?"

 

"Not that long," Jared said, holding up his torn teeshirt. He decided to give up on it and threw it back over his shoulder. He put on the rest of his clothes and his leather jacket. 

 

"Feels like ages," Jensen said as he buttoned up his uniform shirt. As he worked, Jared crept up behind him, and nipped at his ear. "Ow!"

 

He laughed with Jensen, kissing away the pain he'd caused. "Sorry you skipped school?"

 

"Are you kidding?" he returned. "I just got way more exercise than I do at school. _And_ , I learned a few new useful things."

 

"Also something never done in school."

 

Outside the room, Mrs. Tomiko waited. She apparently thought Jared and Jensen weren't moving fast enough, so she pounded on the door again. "What take so long?" she asked.

 

Annoyed, Jared suddenly yanked the door open wide. " _Alright_. Sorry," he apologized, although it was without an ounce of remorse. "Have your room back."

 

Mrs. Tomiko looked angrily back at him. Her expression changed when she saw Jensen emerge from the room. She peeked inside, so sure that a woman _must_ be in there, taking her own sweet time. But there was no woman. "Where lady?" she asked. "What you do with lady?"

 

"No lady," Jared said. He put his arm around Jensen, whose uniform shirt was un-tucked and wrinkled. "Just me," he continued, pointing to his own chest first, and then Jensen's, "and him."

 

Jensen let Jared talk to the woman, smiling as he watched the scene. Jared loved shocking people, getting a rise out of them. He chuckled when Mrs. Tomiko looked at the state of his clothing, and the lack of Jared's.

 

"What you take room for?" Mrs. Tomiko asked, hands on her hips. "No drugs here!"

 

"No drugs either," Jared agreed. "Sex."

 

She seemed horrified for a moment at the idea of the two men having sex. She started to wag a disciplinary finger at them, cut short by Jensen handing her a couple of bills from his wallet. 

 

"Thank you, Mrs Tomiko," he smiled. "This is to cover the extra time we stayed."

 

She looked down at the money in her hand, enough to rent the room for another hour. She smiled brightly and nodded her head. Watching the two young men leave her establishment, she waved to them. "You good customer," she declared. "You come back for sex any time!"

 

 

 

 

Home. No matter how many times they drove up to the house, it was never new for Jensen to feel a rush of happiness. This was the house that was full of life, held good memories, laughter and support. His own house, so far removed, had always seemed cold and lifeless. Getting off the bike, Jensen stepped back enough so that Jared could dismount, too. They removed their helmets and headed into the house, where it was warmer than out in the garage, the door still slowly rattling shut.

 

"Honey, I'm home," Jared called, as he moved into the kitchen.

 

"And where the hell have _you_ been?"

 

Smiling brightly, Jared looked into the living room. Jeffrey was there, sitting on the sofa, surrounded by a number of pillows. His leg was propped up and the coffee table had been converted into a make-shift storeroom for him. Anything he needed was there. 

 

"Ho-ly shit," Jared laughed. "What are _you_ doing here?"

 

Jeffrey smiled. "I made life a bitch down at the hospital until they let me go."

 

"I see it didn't take very long," Jensen noted.

 

"Jeff's the king at making life hell," Jared said, stepping closer to the older man. "Trust me. He's been making my life hell since I was about, oh, twelve?"

 

"And you've loved every minute of it," Jeffrey winked. "Stevie ran out to fill my prescriptions. Get me a beer would you?"

 

Jared took off into the kitchen while Jensen sat down in the nearby sofa chair. "How are you feeling?"

 

"Even my goddamn hair hurts," Jeffrey complained. "But I'm alive, so I guess I can't complain too much. How was school today?"

 

"S-school was...school was great," he answered, glancing in Jared's direction for a moment. "Same old, same old."

 

Jeffrey stared at him for a moment. "Did you play hooky?"

 

"What?" Jensen scoffed. " _No_."

 

"We had sex in a motel," Jared said, moving back into the living room, holding a full glass. He opened his leather jacket with his free hand for Jeffrey to look at his bare, shirtless chest. 

 

" _Jared_ ," Jensen complained.

 

Jeffrey took the glass of water offered to him, looking at it with a confused expression. "So I'm assuming you didn't go to work," he said to Jared, looking down at the drink. "What the hell is this?"

 

"You can't have beer with medication, Captain Brilliance," Jared told him. "And I _went_ to work. I just didn't feel like staying all day."

 

"I don't _have_ any damn medication yet, wiseass," Jeffrey reminded him. He sighed and gave in, taking a long drink of water. "So where'd you get fired from?"

 

"I didn't get fired," he said. "I quit."

 

"From where?"

 

"I ain't tellin' you."

 

"McDonalds," Jensen offered, then smiled sarcastically at Jared.

 

"Traitor," Jared growled at him.

 

"Hey, you told the motel secret."

 

"Alright," Jeffrey said, grunting as he leaned over to set his drink on the coffee table. Both Jensen and Jared quickly moved to help, but he snapped at them, sending them back to their places. "I'm not a goddamn child. I can do this myself."

 

Jared suppressed a grin, not taking the anger to heart. He backed off, as did Jensen, letting Jeffrey settle against his pillows again.

 

"Okay, I have something to tell you," he said. "And if you blow it all out of proportion, I'm going to kick your asses."

 

"Okay," Jensen said for both of them.

 

"Stevie and me," he began. "We're getting married."

 

It was silent in the house. Jensen's gaze immediately shifted to Jared to see how he would handle the news. He hadn't handled Stevie too well at first, but he seemed okay.

 

"Like... Right now?" Jared asked. 

 

"No, smartass," Jeffrey sighed. "We haven't set a date yet."

 

"Okay," Jared shrugged. "Let us know when you do." Without another word, he headed out to the garage. Jensen watched him go, then glanced over to Jeffrey, who also had turned to watch Jared leave.

 

He smiled when Jeffrey looked at him. "Congratulations," he nodded. "From Jared too."

 

"I hope so, kid," he said. "I love that little bastard, but if he ruins this..."

 

"He won't," Jensen said. "He's happy. He's just... Jared." 

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen's eyes opened, unsure as to what had awakened him. He listened to the relative silence in the garage. The heater hummed in the corner, and Jared's breathing was soft and even beside him, his back to Jensen. The evening had been a little longer than usual, but not because of a need to repeat what had been done in the motel. Jared had come out into the garage and, after a while, Jensen had followed. He found Jared sitting on the sofa. The television was on, but Jared wasn't looking at it. Instead, he stared off into space, unblinking and breathing shallowly.

 

"Hey," Jensen had said to him. "You okay?"

 

He'd finally pulled himself out of his day-dream at that point. He'd looked up to Jensen and nodded. "Yeah."

 

"You don't look fine."

 

Jared had chuckled then, eyes sparkling mischievously as he gazed up at Jensen. "You've never told me that before."

 

That had been his first clue that Jared really was okay. Sitting down next to him, Jensen had been ready to settle in for a good discussion. But all Jared did was smile at him and say, "Life really does go on, doesn't it?"

 

During the night, Jared had faced away from Jensen, not something he did very often, and pulled Jensen's arms around him. Jensen thought, maybe for a moment, that Jared was crying, but he never confirmed his suspicions. Instead, he held the man, letting him be sad for a little while. Jensen knew that Jared was missing his mother more than he was letting on, but he also knew that Jared knew he knew. 

 

After the dizzying thought process, both of them had drifted off to sleep. Jensen, awakened by something, propped himself up on one elbow and looked around the garage.

 

"Jared?"

 

It was Stevie's voice. Jensen reached over and shook Jared awake. The man grumbled in protest at first, but then opened his eyes. 

 

"What, what's wrong?" he asked.

 

"Stevie's calling you."

 

Taking a deep breath, Jared turned onto his back and looked up at the ceiling. He heard Stevie call his name again and sat up. "Yeah," he replied.

 

"Jeffrey needs some help," she said. "He asked for you."

 

"Okay," he nodded. "I'll be right there."

 

"Want me to come too?"

 

Jared reached back and patted Jensen, who he knew was as naked as he was under the covers. "Later maybe," he said. He reached for the pair of sleeping pants he had shed before crawling into bed and pulled them up quickly, only flashing a little backside to Stevie if she was looking. He headed down the ladder and followed his soon-to-be step-mother into the house.

 

Rubbing at his eyes, Jared followed Stevie into the bedroom. "What's up?" he asked.

 

"I gotta take a piss," Jeffrey said. 

 

"Dude," Jared complained. "You woke me up to tell me you gotta take a _piss_?"

 

"Stevie can't bring me in there," he snapped, sitting up in bed rather gingerly. "I'm too heavy for Chrissake. Get over here and help me."

 

Jared sighed. "Alright, but I'm not holding your--"

 

"Jared."

 

"I'm just sayin'."

 

Jared was back in bed after about fifteen minutes. Jensen asked what was going on; Jared gave him the abbreviated version. He thought about taking Jensen up on his earlier, unintentional offer of sex. But the morning was nearing and Jensen would have to head off to school in a couple of hours anyway. With Jeffrey settled, sleep quickly returned to Jared, and he didn't awaken until late morning. When he finally did get up, Jensen was gone, with nearly half of his day already over with. After showering and shaving, Jared checked on Jeffrey one last time. Shelby was on the sofa with him, lying between Jeffrey's legs, her head against his stomach. Jared made sure the man had everything he needed and headed out the door. He promised to pick up something for dinner and took off on his bike. The roads were wet from the late night cold rain, so Jared took it slower than usual. He swerved into Mickey's parking lot and slotted the bike in one of the parking spaces up front. After a couple of knocks on the door, Rock answered.

 

"We're closed, Jay," he said.

 

"I know, let me in, man."

 

Without asking why, Rock stepped back and let Jared in. He locked the door again and moved back around the bar. "How's the old man doing?"

 

"Fine," he answered. "Being his usual pain-in-the-ass-self."

 

Rock moved behind the bar, not caring that Jared set his stuff atop the counter and followed him. "So what's up with you?"

 

"Dude, I need a damn _job_ ," Jared complained. "You gotta help me out."

 

"I ain't _gotta_ do anything."

 

"I went to McDonald's, you asshole," Jared snapped at him. He pulled out a case of beer, opened it and handed the bottles to Rock, who stashed them in the cooler. 

 

Rock laughed as he stocked the cooler. "How'd that turn out for you?"

 

"Bite me. I lasted at least until noon."

 

"Couple hours longer than I would have given you credit for."

 

"You gotta talk to Mickey," he said. "Please? I will do just about any-goddamn-thing I have to. You _know_ me. You know I'll work out here."

 

Rock sighed and straightened as he looked at him. "Would we take a loss, is my question?"

 

Narrowing his eyes, Jared scowled. "Oh, fuck right off," he said with a smile. "Like you don't drink while you're here."

 

"I'm an _angel_ , Jared," he grinned. 

 

"Yeah," he nodded. "Sure. _Rock_."

 

 

 

 

The talks with Rock weren't getting him anywhere. Jared still wasn't ready to give up. By the time he and Rock had readied the bar for the opening hour, Terry had finally arrived. Terry was the first on-call at the bar that night, with just him and Rock working until business picked up. In the back room, Jared was washing the dirt and grime off of his hands after having opened a box with a broken bottle of Captain Morgan in it.

 

"Hey, man," Terry greeted. 

 

Drying off his hands with a towel, an evil plan came to mind. Terry was the newest hire, Jared knew. He was also the most timid of the employees. Survival of the fittest, Jared thought. "Hey," he said back, turning off the water. "What's goin' on, dude?"

 

"Ready for another night."

 

Jared smiled. "You know, I gotta say," he began. "I'm proud of you."

 

Terry made a confused face at him. "For what?"

 

"For sticking with this job, man."

 

"It's a bartending gig," Terry shrugged. "What's the big deal?"

 

"Well, sure," Jared nodded. "But not many people would be so willing to work with Rock. And work so well, too."

 

Terry chuckled. "Why, what's wrong with Rock?"

 

A startled look flashed across Jared's face. "Oh," he said gravely. "They... They didn't tell you about Rock, did they?"

 

Concerned, Terry's smile faded and he stepped closer. "Didn't tell me what?"

 

Raising his hands in the air, Jared took a few steps back. "No, you know what?" he said. "If they didn't tell you, it was for a good reason. I'm going to shut up and just get out of everyone's hair."

 

"No, wait, come on, man," Terry pleaded. "You can't just leave after saying something like that."

 

Out by the bar, Jared grabbed his jacket and keys to his bike. Rock was upstairs in the office, checking up on a few things before they opened for the night. "No, really," he said. "I'm sure that if they didn't tell you, he's staying on his meds. He must be. Everything will be fine."

 

"Jared."

 

He looked at Terry and set a hand to his heart. "I'm sorry, man," he apologized, sounding sincere. "I swear. Rock's a great man. An awesome friend. And he never _meant_ to hurt those guys."

 

"What _guys_?"

 

He covered his mouth with his hand for a moment. "Shit, I shouldn't have said that," he mumbled to himself. "Look, forget it. Rock... He just gets... Mad sometimes. As long as he doesn't get mad, you're fine, right?" He threaded his arms through his leather jacket and moved towards the front door. "Just... Have a great night, okay? And really, don't worry about a thing. He's in a great mood."

 

Just as Jared turned and reached for the lock, Terry called out to him. He quickly hid his smile and turned back around. Terry stepped closer to keep their conversation quiet. 

 

"Hey, did he _kill_ someone?"

 

Jared looked around, as if making sure no one was nearby, listening in on what he was about to say. "Only a _little_ ," he whispered back to the man.

 

"A little?" Terry hissed at him. "How do you kill someone only a little?"

 

"Well, the first guy, okay, he kinda... Died. But that wasn't really Rock's fault. That was more kinda like the blunt trauma thing he had going."

 

Terry seemed stunned. "Blunt trau-- How many were there?"

 

"Five?"

 

"Jesus Christ." He shook his head, pulled Jared away from the door, further into the bar. "You gotta stay here."

 

"I can't," Jared said, going with him. "I have to go."

 

"You can't leave me alone with him."

 

"Terry," he sighed. "You're a big boy. You can take care of yourself." He clapped both hands against the timid bartender's shoulders. "Now, go into the back and get ready for tonight. You'll be fine."

 

Taking a deep breath, Terry nervously nodded his head. "Yeah, yeah, okay."

 

Jared did his best to not laugh as Terry headed into the back stockroom to gather his courage. The kid was way too easy to manipulate. A second later, he heard pounding footsteps as Rock descended the staircase that led from the upstairs office, into the stockroom. 

 

"Jesus Christ," Rock complained. "I'm so pissed off, I could kill someone."

 

Choking back laughter, Jared leaned against the bar. He heard a muffled conversation between Terry and Rock, and leaned down to the countertop, setting his forehead there and spying at his reflection in the glossy surface at incredible zoom.

 

"Hey," Rock said. "Hey!"

 

But apparently Terry was gone. The back door closed and Rock swore.

 

"Jared!"

 

Straightening, Jared couldn't stop the smile from showing on his face. Rock stormed into the room, glaring at him. "What's wrong, big guy?"

 

"First a goddamn supplier bums out on us," Rock growled, "and then Terry backs out of the job after only a couple weeks?"

 

Jared shrugged. "You're kinda hard to work with," he said. "A little gassy when it comes to the late-night food here."

 

"Fuck you," Rock snapped. "What'd you say to him?"

 

"I didn't say anything!"

 

"Yeah, right," he said. "You come to me, begging for a job. I ain't got one for you. Leave you alone with an employee and magically he freaks and runs?" He reached out and took hold of Jared's collar, yanking him closer and almost over the bar. "What did you say, you little prick?"

 

"I told him you killed five people."

 

Eye to eye, Rock stared at Jared. He sighed and shoved him back, letting go of him. "Only five this time?"

 

"Didn't want to overdo it."

 

"How'd I kill 'em?"

 

"I don't know," Jared shrugged. "Something blunt trauma-ish. I saw it in one of Jen's medical journal things the other night."

 

Sighing again, Rock shook his head. "Get your goddamn stuff in the back," he said. "That includes your piece of shit bike too."

 

"Piece of shit?" Jared said, clearly taking offense. "You think your--"

 

Rock held up a finger to him. "Another word, and you can ride that piece of shit back home. Jobless."

 

Jared closed his mouth.

 

"I'll phone Mickey and tell him the plans. You get your shit together."

 

"Thank you, Rock."

 

"Don't thank me," he said. "It's only temporary."

 

Jared smiled. He'd make sure it was anything but temporary.


	41. Chapter thirty-nine

It was 1am by the time Jared got home. He hadn’t planned on working so late, but Rock had made him put in extra hours as an apology for his method of getting the job. The lights were all out when he arrived back and he was as quiet as possible about turning his key in the lock, despite the fact that his bike had probably disturbed anyone sleeping already. He’d called home earlier and told Stevie that he’d be back late, so he at least knew nobody would think he was breaking in.

 

Jensen was awake when he got up to their bed, though, which he’d kind of expected. He looked sleepy, so he’d obviously dozed off some already. Jared shucked off his clothes and crawled under the covers, letting Jensen roll into him. He wrapped an arm around the younger man’s shoulder and kissed the side of his head.

 

“Mm… Where were you?”

 

“I got a job at Mickey’s place.”

 

“Oh. What time is it?”

 

“Gone one, Jen, go to sleep.”

 

Jensen moaned, turning, and eased one leg over both of Jared’s. “Missed you today,” he mumbled, his voice sleep-warm and deep.

 

“I missed you too, but we both gotta get some rest.”

 

“You smell like beer,” Jensen told him, and he shivered at the sudden press of tongue to his ribs. Okay, so he wasn’t going to get to sleep without a little foreplay first; that much was clear.

 

“I need to work on my barrel-changing,” Jared explained, a half-laugh, half-moan escaping him when Jensen’s hand smoothed down his stomach and teased through fine, crisp hairs. “Jesus… You been planning this?”

 

“Been studying all night,” Jensen answered. “And thinking about you.”

 

“Thinkin’ what about me?”

 

He wasn’t going to get Jensen talking dirty that easy, but it had been worth a shot. Jensen just chuckled, moving down and breathing in the sweaty musk of Jared’s arousal. He touched his tongue to Jared’s dick, humming quietly as the other man’s hand came to rest against the back of his skull. He lifted his head, breathing out over Jared’s stomach.

 

“Want you to fuck me,” he whispered, then lowered his face against Jared’s hip as if he was embarrassed. Jared smiled; it wasn’t as though he could see much more detail of his face than a pale shape anyway. He reached out to the side of the bed and turned on the small lamp there, making Jensen groan and blink at the sudden brightness.

 

“Should’ve just said so,” Jared said. “C’mon up here.”

 

Jensen did as he was told, relishing in the warmth of Jared’s arms around him, the taste of his mouth as they kissed. It was plain that Jared wasn’t going to waste any time when he felt the first press of a finger inside him. He grunted, shifting away from the kiss, and complained at Jared.

 

“I know, Jen… Just teasin’.”

 

Jared let him go long enough to root around at the side of the bed for the KY and condoms he kept there. He found them and Jensen patiently kissed his shoulders and neck as Jared got his fingers slicked up. Then he lifted himself up onto all fours next to Jared and, okay, that was surely too fucking much for his brain to handle at this time of night, but he went with it and Jensen moaned and squirmed above him when Jared started opening him up, getting him ready.

 

“You wanna try it this way?” Jared asked, his voice not even above a whisper, and Jensen looked down at him, sweaty and confused.

 

“Huh?”

 

“I mean, you wanna ride my cock?”

 

It was blunt, and Jared grinned at the heat that suddenly bloomed on Jensen’s face, in his eyes. He slowly nodded, and held himself where he was as Jared unwrapped the condom and rolled it down over his dick. If every man could get him as hard as Jensen did just by looking at him he’d be in serious fucking trouble, he knew.

 

“Okay… Easy, ‘cause this can be fuckin’ awkward…”

 

Jensen ignored the warning and reached around himself for balance and to grip the base of Jared’s cock as he slid down onto it. Light exploded in the edges of Jared’s vision as he was slowly sheathed in tight heat and he opened his mouth, lifting his head from the pillows to catch a breath. His curse elicited a sly smile from Jensen, and he moved his hands to rest on Jensen’s back, at the base of his spine. He stroked the skin there and Jensen pressed his hands down against Jared’s chest, stretching his arms as he lifted himself a couple of inches and then pushed back down. Harder and deeper this time.

 

“Christ…” Jared muttered, the exact same time that Jensen murmured, “Fuck!” Jared brought a hand round to make a fist around Jensen’s cock, baring his teeth when the younger man hissed in something between pain and pleasure. He was going to end up yelling the house down, but Jared couldn’t be bothered to try and stop him. 

 

Jensen’s dick was already solid, leaking, and Jared guessed that he hadn’t been kidding about thinking of this all night. He pulled upward, spreading his palm over the sensitive head and watching the younger man’s reaction as he closed his hand and pushed his hips upward at the same time. Jensen’s loud cry echoed through the otherwise still garage and he bit his lip a moment later, as if trying to take it back.

 

“That’s it, Jen, come on… Stop thinking and just let it go.”

 

Urging him on with hard strokes and teasing flicks of his thumb, Jared only shut up when it became too much effort to keep talking. Jensen was too loud to hear him anyway, and he loved to listen to it. The noises were a turn-on, and Jensen’s fingers dancing over his nipples did nothing to hinder that.

 

Jared slammed his body up, held himself there as he came, desperately trying not to choke on his own breath. A few moments later Jensen shuddered, tightened around him, and came into Jared’s hand. Jared let go, let it paint his stomach, and closed his eyes in complete bliss.

 

 

 

 

When Jensen went back inside after showering and returning to the garage to dress in his school uniform, he was surprised to see Stevie was sat at the kitchen table still in her robe. With Jared on an evening job, she’d said yesterday that she would be returning to work since he could stay at home and take care of Jeff now. But it didn’t look like she was going anywhere right now.

 

“Are you okay?” Jensen asked, as he moved around the kitchen to pour some coffee and grab some cereal.

 

“I don’t know. I don’t feel so good today.”

 

“Well, you have had a pretty busy few days,” Jensen pointed out. “Maybe you should just have another day off to rest anyway.”

 

“Maybe,” Stevie agreed. 

 

“Is that Jensen?” Jeffrey called through from his place on the sofa.

 

“Yessir?”

 

Jensen stepped out towards the living room and Jeffrey twisted his upper body so he could look him in the eyes. “You think maybe tonight you and Jay could keep the noise down a little bit? Kind of kept us awake last night, kiddo.”

 

Jensen’s cheeks flamed hot at that, and he looked down at his feet as he nodded. “Sorry.”

 

“Don’t be sorry. Ain’t gonna begrudge you boys having a bit of fun, long as you start thinking about having it at a more reasonable hour. Or just be a bit quieter about it.”

 

“Okay,” Jensen mumbled. He went back into the kitchen and sat at the table opposite Stevie, pulling his bowl of cereal towards him. She was grinning at him and he resolutely avoided her eyes because he knew if he looked at her he was going to blush like a moron again. 

 

Chris was picking him up again that morning, since he’d told Stevie not to worry about hiring a car. It was just extra money that they didn’t need to spend, after all, and he was happy to run her to school and back and if she wanted him to take her and Jensen anywhere else, she was welcome to ask. Jensen had been touched by that, by how much his friend was willing to go out of his own way to help them. Chris had told him that he did it because he knew if anything happened to him or his family, he could expect the same in return. Jensen had agreed whole-heartedly.

 

He finished his breakfast, said goodbye to Stevie and Jeff, and headed for the door when he heard Chris pulling up outside and tapping his horn. He climbed into the passenger seat, throwing his bag into the back with Chris’s. Chris leant across the front seat, as he had jokingly done every day that he’d picked Jensen up so far, and pursed his lips as if waiting for a kiss. Jensen pressed the flat of his hand to Chris’s face, pushing him away with a tired laugh.

 

“You asshole.”

 

“You’re in a mood this morning,” Chris told him. “Someone upset my baby?”

 

“I’m not in a mood, I’m just tired.”

 

“You should tell Jay to leave you alone at night,” Chris said, signalling to pull out into the road. 

 

“He’s got a job over at Mickey’s, so he didn’t get back until real late. Then we had this amazing sex, so… I’m kind of bushed.”

 

Chris looked over at Jensen, eyes wide, and Jensen told him to keep his eyes on the damned road.

 

“Well, you should warn a guy before you come out with something like that.”

 

“What’s the matter, Chris? You a little frustrated?”

 

His friend shrugged. “Dani’s been busy.”

 

“Are you two still okay?”

 

“Yeah! I mean, I think so. She just has a lot going on with her family right now, that’s all. We saw each other last week, and we’re going out on Saturday night.”

 

“Dude, a week’s a long time without it. Your dick might shrivel up and _die_.”

 

Chris reached across and smacked Jensen’s arm at that remark. “Shut up,” he said, shaking his head. “It’s not gonna shrivel up. Just ‘cause I don’t see her, doesn’t mean I ain’t using it.”

 

“Long as you ain’t thinking about me and Jay while you’re taking care of business.”

 

Chris’s eyes creased up at the corners as he smirked. “Who’s to say?” Then his face straightened out. “Is this getting weird yet?”

 

“What, the worry that you’re cheating on your girlfriend by having gay sex fantasies, or the fact that the fantasies are about me?”

 

“I never said they were about you. Maybe they’re about Kirsten Dunst.”

 

Jensen laughed. “They’re not about Kirsten Dunst. I know you better than that.”

 

Chris just shrugged and smiled. “Believe what you want to believe, Jen,” he said. “My fantasies remain between me and my right hand.”

 

“Classy…”

 

“You know it.” Chris leaned forward then, turning the heater up and the radio on. Jensen wondered if it was because the conversation had turned more awkward for him or if he was just trying to rescue his friend from thinking of something to say. If he was honest with himself, he was thinking way too hard about it already. He set his mind back to thinking about Jared instead, just to stop himself getting too embarrassed. After their noisy fuck last night, Jared had cleaned them both up and then wrapped his limbs around Jensen’s body, holding him close to warm him up. Not that Jensen had really needed it. He’d fallen asleep still kissing him, he thought. It was the last thing he remembered, anyway. When he’d woken up that morning, Jared had been fast asleep and hadn’t stirred once while Jensen moved around the garage to get ready.

 

He was glad Jared had gotten a job that he’d be good at, that he would enjoy. With people that didn’t give a shit about customer relations so long as they got their beer. But he knew that the late nights and the not seeing each other save the weekends would test their relationship plenty over the coming weeks. He knew how he felt about Jared; he just wished Jared could say the words out loud just once, so that he could be sure that the feelings were mutual.

 

 

 

 

The week went quick for Jared, although less so for Jensen. He’d get home at four, have an hour to eat with Jared, Jeff and Stevie, and do dishes, and then Jared would kiss him goodbye and head out to Mickey’s for the night, not getting back in until after midnight. Jensen woke up again the second night, but on the third night of it he slept right through. He missed Jared, but he couldn’t skip school again. Jeff had told him as much when he’d actually considered it aloud at dinner.

 

“No more time off,” Jeff said. “The stuff that’s coming up now is too important for you to miss. Having a teacher living in at home is no excuse.”

 

“I wouldn’t-“

 

“I know you wouldn’t, Jen. Just don’t let Jared try and talk you into it, either.”

 

It wasn’t until Friday night that Jensen insisted Jared let him tag along. He wanted to see his boyfriend in action, he teased, and he needed a night out. Most nights, after his homework was done, he wound up watching TV with Jeff and Stevie, helping them both with any chores that came up. He didn’t mind – he knew that Jared was busy night and day, since he was fixing other bikes now between waking up and waiting for Jensen to get home, but he missed spending time together.

 

“Rock sees you more than I do,” he grumbled, as he watched Jared gather his things together for his shower.

 

“You start paying me then I’ll stay here,” Jared suggested.

 

“What’s your hourly rate?” Jensen asked, pressing against him with his lips parted, teasingly.

 

“More than anyone can afford,” Jared answered, winking as he stepped free. 

 

“Guess it’s a good job you do me free of charge then, huh?”

 

“I guess so.”

 

“I’ll come with you tonight, okay? Keep you company, brighten up your night.”

 

“I didn’t think Mickey’s was your scene.”

 

“It’s not, but I heard they have this really hot bartender now. Thought I might go check him out.”

 

Jared laughed. “You trying to make me jealous, Ackles? ‘Cause you know it won’t work.”

 

“I hear he gives real good head, too.”

 

“Nobody does that better than me, so you make sure this other dude knows that.”

 

“I will if you let me come with you,” Jensen said.

 

“I can’t keep an eye on you, you know? I’ll be working, so it’s not like we’ll be hanging out.”

 

Jensen rolled his eyes. “I know that.”

 

“So what the hell are you going to do all night?”

 

“Watch you, distract you, think about you naked…”

 

Jared shook his head with a smile. “Guess I had to ask, huh? Look, why don’t you bring Chris along? He ain’t been out there yet and if he brings you in his truck then at least I don’t have to worry about sliding off the road with your ass behind me.”

 

“I’ll call him and ask,” Jensen agreed.

 

“And tell him to dress right.”

 

“Chris has a lot more style than I do, I promise.”

 

“You can come in as little as you want,” Jared said, winking at him with a dirty grin. “But now I gotta go get ready. Come by for about nine-thirty. Any earlier you’ll be bored out of your mind.”

 

Jensen nodded, and then voiced a concern which had been on his mind for a few days now. “Is Chuck going to be there?”

 

Jared shrugged. “Probably. He is most nights. I’ve been lucky so far, or maybe he wants to stay away from me as much as I do from him. Rock generally looks after him, cause he knows how we feel about each other.”

 

“Good. So long as he stays away from me.”

 

Reaching out, Jared grabbed Jensen by the waist and pulled him in for a long kiss. “Don’t worry, darlin’. If he tries anything with you, I’ll definitely be stepping in.”

 

“I’m hoping I’m not his type…”

 

“You probably aren’t. Now, let me go. I really need to take a shower and get going.”

 

Sighing, Jensen did as he was told.

 

 

 

 

Chris picked him up at about nine and whistled when Jensen got in beside him. “Who are you trying to impress then, huh?”

 

“Just Jared. And I doubt he’ll be impressed. Turned on, maybe…”

 

Chris chuckled, waving to Stevie who’d come out the door while he was sat in the driveway. Jensen rolled down his window when she drew near and she curled her fingers around the edge of the window, smiling in at them.

 

“Everything all right?” Chris asked.

 

“Of course it is. I just wanted to tell you boys to drive safe and keep out of trouble.”

 

“Ah, you mean Jeff sent you out here to tell us that.”

 

“Well, yes. But I want you to be safe too. Chris, if you want to stay overnight when you get back then I’ll leave some blankets and pillows out on the couch for you, okay?”

 

“Thanks, that’d be great.”

 

Stevie smiled brightly. “No problem. Have a good night, okay? I’ll see you both tomorrow.”

 

Jensen said goodbye to her, watching as she hurried back into the house with her arms wrapped around herself, trying to keep warm. 

 

“What’s it like, living with a teacher?” Chris asked, as he put the truck in drive and headed out of the driveway.

 

“It’s pretty great,” Jensen answered. “She makes sure I do all my homework and she cooks way better than Jeff does.”

 

“Maybe I’ll find out tomorrow. Oh, hey, Steve called me earlier.”

 

“Oh yeah? How’s his new place?”

 

“Pretty sweet by all accounts. He says he’s got a couple of gigs weekend after next. If Jared’s still at work then d’you fancy a road-trip over there to hang out?”

 

“Uh… Maybe. I’ll have to think about it.”

 

“If you want to wait until he can come too it’s okay. It’s a four hour drive and I know what you got going on right now.”

 

Jensen nodded. It’d be cool to see Steve and hear the band again, but he wasn’t convinced that Jared would want him gone for the whole weekend.

 

 

 

 

When Chris pulled up outside the bar it looked busy. There were already plenty of bikes out front, and a couple of battered-looking trucks. 

 

“We’re not going to get in a fight, are we?” Chris asked, as he turned the engine off and killed the lights.

 

“I’ll try not to,” Jensen assured him. He took off his jacket then and peeled off the ripped tee-shirt he was wearing underneath it before pulling the leather jacket back on.

 

“Okay, that’s not fair. Now I’m really going to stand out.”

 

Jensen shook his head, taking in his friend’s torn blue jeans, plain black tee, and heavy black denim over-shirt. “You’re not, I promise. C’mon.” 

 

They left the truck and headed to the door of the bar, the noise of the music audible before they even got near it. Jensen felt nervous and almost wished he’d kept his shirt on, but he’d promised Jared that he was going to tease him and this was a good way to do it. He wanted him wound up and ready by the time his break rolled around. Jensen led Chris directly to the bar, trying not to meet anyone’s eye until he got there. He spotted Jared at the other end of the bar, pouring out shots, and he leaned his hip against the counter while he stood and watched.

 

“Jay!” Rock called, from right by Jensen’s shoulder. “Your jailbait just arrived.”

 

A couple of the guys looked round at that, and Jensen studied the mirror behind the bar intently when they did. As soon as Jared was done with the other group, he walked down to where Jensen and Chris were standing.

 

“You know you’re not old enough for the hard stuff, right Jen?”

 

“Ha ha. How about a couple of beers?”

 

Jared nodded and turned away to grab two bottles from the nearest fridge. He twisted the caps off and set them down on the bar. “Anything else?”

 

“You don’t want us to pay?”

 

He was flashed a cheeky grin. “You come in here looking like you do right now, that’s all the payment I need.” 

 

“But-“

 

“Seriously, Jen. I’ll sort it out of my pay check. Enjoy your beer.” Jared looked about to say something else, but he was called away by another customer and showed them an apologetic smile before heading away.

 

“This place is packed,” Chris observed, gripping his beer tight.

 

“Yeah. Friday night, I guess everyone comes out.”

 

“Does he get a break?”

 

Jensen glanced over to where Jared was now clearing glasses off the bar to make room for fresh drinks. “Yeah. Around half-ten, if you-“

 

“I’ll be fine for fifteen minutes,” Chris promised. “You can go see to his needs. Sure I can entertain myself.”

 

“You sure?”

 

“If I get threatened by anyone then I’ll go lock myself in the truck or just ditch your ass and leave.”

 

“Thanks a lot, man.”

 

“Hey, you know you can count on me.” Chris’s eyes widened then and Jensen stiffened when he felt a large hand pat his shoulder, hard.

 

“Rock, didn’t know you was setting up a goddamn crèche here. Ain’t these two adorable?”

 

Jensen cringed at the sound of Chuck’s voice and tried to hide in the collar of his jacket. Rock was opposite them in only a couple of seconds, giving Chuck a warning look.

 

“You want to take your hands off him right the fuck now, Chuckie-Doll?”

 

“Why?” Chuck sneered.

 

“Jay sees you touching him like that then we’re all gonna have some trouble. And after the last brawl you started in here with these boys, we don’t need more trouble. Mickey’s still sore from the last repair bill he got for this joint and if I gotta call him again then he’s gonna end up coming down here. And ain’t none of us want that.”

 

Chuck let go of Jensen’s shoulder at that, but leaned forward to speak into his ear. “Just ‘cause you got tattoos now and a tough boyfriend, don’t make you one of us. You got friends while you’re in here, but once we get out on the street then nothing else matters. You understand me, kid?”

 

Jensen swallowed nervously and nodded, until Rock said Chuck’s name again and the older man stepped away, whistling as he went back to his corner.

 

“Well, hell, I can see why you love this place,” Chris deadpanned, lifting his beer to take a swig.

 

“I didn’t say I love it. I just needed to be with Jay.”

 

Rock leaned over the bar then. “Maybe you boys oughta just take a seat well away from Chuck and his crowd. I got an eye on him, so don’t worry. When you gotta go, you just go.”

 

“Thanks, Rock,” Jensen said. He took the man’s advice, eager to get away from the bar now. Chris snagged them a table well away from most of the bar’s other patrons and they sat and talked while they nursed their beers.

 

It was almost eleven by the time Jared came out from behind the bar, bringing two more beers with him.

 

“They’re paid for,” he said, when Jensen reached for his wallet. “So long as Chris doesn’t get drunk.”

 

“I’m all right,” Chris protested.

 

Jensen hooked a finger in Jared’s belt loop then, before he could move to sit down, and he stood as he pulled him closer. “How long’s your break tonight?”

 

Jared checked his watch. “I got another twenty minutes.”

 

“Good. Show me the break room.”

 

“I’ll be okay,” Chris said, as Jared opened his mouth to ask.

 

He didn’t need any more persuading than that. Rock ignored the both of them as Jared led Jensen behind the bar and up to the offices. There was another room besides Rock’s office and this was where Jared took Jensen, locking the door behind them. It was a room that looked lived in, Jensen thought. The couch against one wall was ripped in places and stained with things that he didn’t really want to consider. The walls were cobwebby, nicotine yellow, and the low table was covered in rings from dirty mugs and a thin layer of ash and dust. There was a counter along the wall opposite the couch that held an old TV, a small refrigerator, and an antiquated coffee pot that had definitely seen better days. There was a cupboard full of chipped mugs, plates and dirty teaspoons that was open above the TV.

 

“You want a coffee?” Jared asked.

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head. “I got something better in mind,” he answered, reaching down for the fly of Jared’s jeans and tugging the buttons from their holes. 

 

“It’s like you’re obsessed with my dick,” Jared said, lowering his head to watch Jensen slide his hand inside. His teeth ground together at the first touch.

 

Jensen ducked his head and closed the gap between them, kissing Jared hotly. “Addicted, maybe,” he told him. 

 

“Is Chris really gonna be alright on his own?”

 

“Rock’s keeping an eye on Chuck, so yes. You want this or not?”

 

In answer, Jared put a hand on Jensen’s shoulder and pushed him down.

 

 

 

 

 

When they got back down to the bar Jared went straight back to work and Jensen found Chris talking to someone he didn’t recognize at first. It took him a minute to work it out, because Trevor wasn’t wearing his wig or makeup. It was strange to see him in jeans and jacket and he smiled like he knew just what Jensen was thinking.

 

“I know, sugar. Doesn’t exactly suit, does it?”

 

Jensen took a seat and shook his head. “Not really. How come you’re out here?”

 

“I don’t usually bother since, well, the crowd here are real manly men, but I heard from Jeff that Jay was working out here and figured I’d come show him some support. Looks like he doesn’t need it though.”

 

Jensen looked back to where Jared was leant over the counter, listening to someone’s drinks order and nodding. “He’s doing surprisingly okay here.”

 

“This is his kind of place. He pretty much grew up with these people after his mom died, so yeah. Makes sense he’d feel at home here.”

 

“I guess so.”

 

“Oh, don’t worry honey. You definitely got him back on the gay and narrow.”

 

Chris snorted at that, coughing as his beer went down the wrong way. Trevor reached over and patted his back, apologising.

 

“Thanks, I’m good… Maybe we should get going soon, though. Before they start kicking out and we get stuck in the middle of it.”

 

“And before you get any drunker,” Jensen pointed out, reaching over to take the rest of Chris’s beer from him.

 

“That’s still only my second one!” Chris argued as Jensen downed the rest of it. 

 

“And now it’s your last. You’re right though. Let me tell Jay we’re going and then we’ll head out.”

 

Trevor smiled as they both stood, winking at Chris. “You think on what I said about your girl,” he told him.

 

“I will, man. And thanks.”

 

Once Jensen managed to get Jared’s attention and tell him that he and Chris were going to head home and he’d see him there, he followed his friend out to his truck and they started out. Jensen felt a flutter of nerves when he saw a crowd of bikers come out of the bar as they set off, but he didn’t see Chuck amongst them and he relaxed once they were back out on the highway. The stereo was on low, strains of Lynyrd Skynyrd filtering through the speakers as Chris drove. They didn’t talk, instead riding in comfortable silence. Jensen was fine with that, since his mind was just replaying the blowjob Jared had given him in return for his up in the break room. He shifted in his seat, wishing Jared was in the truck with them right then.

 

“You okay?” Chris asked, looking over at him for a moment.

 

“Yeah, no problem. Do you want to stay the night, by the way?”

 

Chris shrugged. “Sure. My parents are out of town right now, so it’s just an empty house I’d be going back to. I’d call Dani, but she’s out with some girlfriends tonight.”

 

“Good to know I’m the next best thing,” Jensen teased.

 

“Sure you are.”

 

“Still before midnight. Jeff and Stevie’ll probably be up watching TV. We could join ‘em, or play some X-box…”

 

“X-box sounds good.”

 

 

 

 

Jared returned to find Jensen and Chris sat side by side on the couch in the garage, controllers dropped at their feet while the game carried on playing its continuous loop of demo footage on the TV screen. There were several empty beer bottles at either end of the couch and both men were snoring, soundly asleep.

 

He turned a heater on for them and grabbed a blanket from a pile of clean laundry on one of the worktops. He threw it over them both and neither of them woke.

 

“Too easy,” he muttered, under his breath, and leaned forward to quickly rearrange them. They didn’t stir and he knew they must be plenty drunk. Kind of a shame, he thought, since he’d had some plans for Jensen after the earlier blowjob. But he could wait. Once Chris left tomorrow morning, they’d have all day before he had to leave again. He’d definitely keep Jensen in bed for at least a couple of hours if he could.

 

Once he’d gotten them nice and comfortable, and plenty in each other’s space, he turned the TV off and headed up to bed alone.


	42. Chapter forty

  
Author's notes: Sorry for the long wait. Enjoy two new chapters!  
______________________________  


* * *

It was his own snoring that woke him up. One loud snort caught in the back of his throat and seemed to echo through the room. Not entirely aware yet, Jensen lifted his head and looked around. He was overly warm, and his body was slightly sweaty where skin was pressed up against skin. He swallowed against a dry throat and blinked his eyes hard. Jared's leg was draped over his own legs, and his arm flopped across Jensen's midriff. His hand was resting comfortably against Jensen's groin, where a morning erection had already begun to form. Stretching right down to his toes, Jensen reached down and set his hand over Jared's, pressing the man's hand down against his erection. Smiling, he looked down to his chest, where Jared's head was propped.

 

Only, it wasn't Jared's head. It was _Chris's_.

 

Startled, Jensen's mouth hung open for a moment and he looked around the garage, desperate for something, _someone_ to save him. He adored Chris, that much was true, but they'd already had their share of awkward moments about this very topic. He didn't remember snuggling up to the man so close, but they'd had quite a bit to drink. 

 

Damn it.

 

Jensen pushed Chris's arm off of him. His own arm was wrapped around Chris's shoulders, holding him. Of course it was. He'd thought Chris was Jared. He tried to wriggle out from underneath Chris without waking the man, but his arm was stuck. Instead, he decided to start from the other end. With his knee, he lifted Chris's leg off of his and started to slide off the sofa. Chris's leg flopped back down, bumping up against Jensen's groin. He really had to pee, and now the pain sent sparking through him made him whimper. He took a moment to recover, and then tried again. Chris had always been a heavy sleeper, but this was ridiculous. Jensen worked his legs out from underneath Chris's. On his knees beside the sofa, he tugged gently at his arm. It was starting to fall asleep from the odd angle. Jensen leaned in closer to try and lift Chris's head off of his arm with his free hand.

 

Just as he was pressed close to Chris again, the man awoke. 

 

"Jesus Christ!" Chris said loudly, his body jerking. "What the hell are you doing?"

 

"I'm sorry," Jensen apologized, finally getting his arm free. "I must've thought you were Jay."

 

"What?" He sat up on the sofa, raking his fingers through his hair. "Why, what'd we do?"

 

"What? Nothing, you _freak_ ," Jensen scowled at him. "We were just... Kind of touching."

 

"Touching where?"

 

Jensen sighed. "Why the hell are you so freaked by this?"

 

"Because I just woke up to find _you_ in my face."

 

"Please," Jensen scoffed. "You've been hot for me from day one."

 

Chris snorted out a laugh. "I think not, my good friend," he corrected. "You've wanted in _my_ pants since you met me."

 

"I have not."

 

"Have too."

 

"Not."

 

"Too."

 

"All right, children."

 

Jensen recognized Jared's voice. He turned and looked up to the second level. Sure enough, Jared was there, clad in only a pair of torn jeans. His hair was tousled, and he had a good shadow of beard stubble. He was smiling, sitting on the edge of the loft, long legs dangling over the side. Jensen saw the man's happy expression and narrowed his eyes at him. 

 

"You set us up like that, didn't you?"

 

Jared laughed. "You guys are so fucking easy."

 

Chris stood and smiled sarcastically up at Jared. "I kind of hate you right now."

 

Jared laughed harder, while Jensen just rolled his eyes. "No, you don't," he said. "Come on, let's go get some breakfast. Master Prankster, are you coming along?"

 

In a move that made Jensen stop breathing for an instant, Jared turned around in his place, legs dangling from the loft. He lowered himself down as far as his long arms would allow, and then dropped down to the garage floor. Jensen, arms out to attempt to catch the man, instead set a hand to his heart. Once he realized Jared was safe and grinning, he smacked the flat of his palm against the man's chest.

 

"You're a _jerk_ ," he said. "You just scared the crap out of me."

 

Laughing evilly, Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen's waist, pulling him in for a kiss. He formed his hands to the curve of Jensn's backside and squeezed gently. "You love me though," he told him.

 

Jensen's lashes fluttered as he rolled his eyes. "Lord knows why," he smiled.

 

 

 

 

With each push-up, Jared grunted slightly, exhaling forcefully through pursed lips. Jensen, who had just finished his own set of sit-ups, reclined nearby, watching him. His eyes focused on the lines of straining muscle underneath Jared's tanned, tattooed skin. The man's form was flawless, his stamina staggering. Although, Jensen had already gotten a glimpse of the stamina by Jared's lovemaking. His eyes travelled down Jared's shirtless back, skin glistening with sweat. They were due in the boxing ring next, just after two spanish men that constantly, playfully snapped obscenities back and forth at each other. Part of Jensen didn't want to practice boxing. He wished the rest of the crowds would disperse, that the place would be empty like it was the first time Jared had brought him here. He wanted to stretch Jared out on the canvas, cover every inch of his body that he could with wet, nipping kisses.

 

Blinking his eyes, Jensen forced himself out of his dream world. Jared was just finishing up his reps, grunting out the numbers he had been counting silently. It was the first night Jared had had off in a week. Jensen would have been happy staying in and making Jared breathless in an entirely different way, but Jared had made him come out to the gym to work off some of his energy.

 

Jensen wondered, for just a moment, if something was wrong with him. Surely it was normal for a man to be preoccupied by sex, but Jensen sometimes felt far too obsessed with it. He saw it in everything, was willing to do it just about anywhere, even if he knew he would suffer terrible embarassment later. Hell, it had even crept out when Chris was around, and that made for some very uncomfortable conversations.

 

It was all Jared's fault, being so sexy and all.

 

He must have drifted off again because the next thing he knew, Jared was standing next to him, his hand stretched out. "Ready?"

 

Looking up, Jensen took hold of Jared's hand and pulled himself to his feet. "Yeah," he answered.

 

"Good," Jared smiled. "I want to see that ass in action. Which reminds me..." He reached around and smacked Jensen's backside with a playful hand. "I'll have to set up the video camera again sometime."

 

_That shouldn't be turning me on_ , Jensen thought silently. 

 

All Jared's fault.

 

 

 

 

 

Sat upon the sofa, Jared's hand slipped up Jensen's sweat-slicked skin, fingers pressing hard enough to dimple flesh and scrape his nails, leaving slight red welts. His hands continued up to Jensen's face, then into his hair, fingers curling into fists there. Not enough to hurt, just enough to hold onto him, keep him in the rough, bruising kiss. The sofa squeaked softly with their movements, Jensen straddling Jared's waist, their heavy breathing matching the rhythm of their bodies. Jensen's hand, hidden between their bodies, kept their lube-slathered cocks pressed together, and both of their hips ground mercilessly against the other's. 

 

Behind the sofa, and off to the side a little bit, was a used-but-in-good-condition golf bag. Protruding from it were four golf putters, one nice wood driver and one nearly-new chipper. Jared had surprised Jensen with them, sticking a store-bought, cheap red bow upon what he assumed was the front of the golf bag. Then, he attached a different color bow to each of the golf clubs.

 

"Where did you _get_ these?" Jensen had asked. He'd had a brand new set when he had lived with his parents. As a matter of fact, he and his father would go out every other Sunday afternoon for a round of golf with the high society folk. Part of Jensen missed that. The game, rather than the company.

 

"I found 'em," Jared shrugged. "I know Jeff got you the golf balls for Christmas. Thought it might be nice to have some way to lob them around."

 

Jensen had eyed him at that point. "You found them, or you stole them?"

 

"Is there a difference?"

 

"Jared!"

 

"Calm down, I _bought_ them," he had said. "They were at the second-hand store, okay?"

 

Jensen had smiled. "And you got them for me."

 

"I did not," he had teased. "I got them for my _other_ hot lover."

 

"Shut up," Jensen had laughed. He took the chipper out of the bag and looked it over. Sure, it was worn, and it wasn't a full-set, but he was touched that Jared had thought of him and spent his hard-earned money on something for him. "Thank you. I don't know what to say."

 

Jared yanked one of the four putters out of the bag, ripped the bow off and reached out to Jensen with it. He worked the blade of the club underneath the collar of Jensen's shirt and tugged gently. "So, don't talk," he'd grinned.

 

Jensen had quickly given in after that. The putter that Jared had had a hold of was still on the garage floor, but the chipper had been placed back into the worn, weathered golf bag. It hand't taken them long to decide that the furthest they could make it was onto the sofa. Clothes were quickly strewn about so that naked skin could press up against more naked skin.

 

Jared took one look down at their bodies, muscle straining together, before looking back up into Jensen's eyes, the color seeming clearer, softer than before, lashes delicate against his skin as the lids drifted closed. Jared pulled him in for another kiss, his tongue hungrily searching out Jensen's. His breath, already ragged, suddenly came in short gasps. He held it in his lungs for just a moment, before letting his mouth fall open wider, a gruff moan escaping him. Jensen felt the sudden rush of warmth spilling over their chests and bellies, smelled the stickyness within it, and felt himself tense as well. He moved a few more times, his spine moving so that his head came to rest upon Jared, in the crook of his neck and shoulder. He growled and shuddered almost violently as he came, his mouth open against Jared's neck.

 

Stillness settled over the garage again. With heavy eyes, Jared looked around. The TV was still on, the program long ago forgotten about. Their work-out clothes were strewn about, some upon the sofa, some on the floor. Jared's underwear was draped across a corner of the television, having been thrown over Jensen's shoulder. Breathing heavy, Jared set his hands to Jensen's hips. "Goddamn fucking _rabbits_ ," he said, sated and happy.

 

Jensen rolled off of him, sitting as he had been before he'd gotten distracted away from television with the clubs. "See what happens when you have a night off?"

 

Smiling, Jared turned to look at him. "I'm sorry," he apologized. "I'm not around as much as I used to be."

 

Jensen shrugged. "It's okay," he said. "It'd be the same way if I was working."

 

It was quiet, Jared just looking at Jensen. "I'm proud of you, you know," he finally said. 

 

Chuckling, Jensen scowled at him. "Why?"

 

"For sticking with this whole school thing."

 

"What are you talking about?" he asked. "You stuck with it."

 

Jared waved off Jensen's smile. "Nah. After Mom died, I kind of lost interest in most things."

 

Smiling brighter, Jensen nudged him with his shoulder. "Until I came along," he said.

 

Looking at him, Jared returned the smile as he nodded his head. "Until you came along," he agreed. 

 

"Because you love me."

 

"Mm," he nodded, inching in closer for a soft kiss. 

 

Jensen let Jared kiss him, and then carefully bumped foreheads with him. "So tell me."

 

"I have."

 

"Not those exact words."

 

Jared snorted out a laugh. "If you didn't get it from what just happened between us, then three stupid words aren't going to make one fucking difference," he told him.

 

Jensen frowned. "It's nice to _hear_ it now and then."

 

Jared stared at him, a smile upon his face. It was silent for several seconds until he clapped a hand onto Jensen's knee and then stood from the sofa. He reached for his underwear and slipped into it. "I'm going to go take a shower," he said. 

 

Sighing, Jensen remained on the sofa.

 

 

 

 

 

As earlier promised -- and ordered by Jared -- Jensen showed up at Mickey's around nine-thirty, closer to ten. He didn't need to tell the bouncer who he was, only that Chris was his guest. The place seemed even more packed than usual. Jensen wondered if it was due to the new bartender. He still believed what he had said to Jared long ago - people just flocked to him. Weaving through the throngs of people, Jensen led the way to the bar. The music was loud. People danced on the hardwood dance floor. Lights of every color flashed around them. Swallowing hard, Jensen looked around. He felt that old nervousness begin to show itself and, for a moment, he wanted to run away. He still wasn't a fan of big crowds. What grounded him was the feel of Chris's arm coming to rest upon his shoulders. He looked over at him, watching his friend nod towards the bar. 

 

"There he is," Chris said.

 

Jensen turned, seeing Jared behind the bar, laughing as boisterously as he always did. He was serving a group of rough-looking bikers and their girls. They were all clad in leather, spikes and chains. Used to be, Jensen would have avoided the group of rough-housers, waited outside to talk to Jared. Now, however, he was slightly more used to the lifestyle. He strolled up to the bar, to the side of the bikers, and leaned against the counter, smiling when he caught Jared's eye.

 

"Hey, speak of the devil," Jared laughed, while pouring a mug of draft for one of the biker's girlfriends.

 

Jensen noticed that the bikers glanced his way, smiling and nodding a hello. "Been talking about me?" He asked.

 

Jared handed over the mug of beer and accepted a wad of cash from one of the bikers. "This round's on me," the man said in a gruff voice. Jared nodded and moved to the cash register. 

 

"Talking, dreaming," he finally answered Jensen. "You name it."

 

Jensen laughed and shook his head while Jared handed change over to the man. 

 

The biker waved it off. "The rest is for you," he said.

 

"Aw, thanks, man," Jared grinned. "Jen, this is Necro, a friend of mine."

 

Jensen nodded and reached over to shake the man's hand. "Necro, this is Chris."

 

"Necro?" Chris repeated as he shook the man's hand. " _Nice_."

 

Necro motioned to the others with him. "The girls are Tiffy, Amber, Dharma and Muff."

 

Chris snorted out a laugh. "Muff."

 

"The fellas are Andy, Drift, Marcus and Satan."

 

Jensen's eyes grew wider at the mention of the last name. "S-Satan?"

 

Satan, who looked like he could play quite the convincing evil part, glanced in Jensen's direction and nodded his head ever-so-slightly. "Yo."

 

Nervously, Jensen nodded back. "H-hi."

 

The group departed, saying a heartfelt, "Later, losers," to Jared, Jensen and Chris. Jared turned away from Jensen and Chris for a moment and returned with two bottles of beer. He popped the caps off and handed them over. 

 

"On the house," Jared declared.

 

"Jay," Jensen said. "You can't keep doing that."

 

"Watch me," he grinned, winking at Jensen.

 

It was still early to the party-goers. Most of them hadn't even really gotten to the bar yet. Jensen took advantage of the momentary lull in patrons and hefted himself up, leaning against the bar. He leaned in closer to Jared and smiled. "When's your break?"

 

"Whenever I fucking want," he grinned back. He gave Jensen a quick kiss and nodded to the doorway behind the bar. "Rock! I'm on a ten!"

 

"Yo," Rock acknowledged. It would be just him and Darlene, another bartender, working the floor for a few minutes.

 

Jensen looked back at Chris before he headed off to the back room with Jared. "Be right back!" 

 

Chris smiled and shook his head. He sat down upon one of the barstools and waved Jensen away. "I'll be here," he said.

 

From behind, Jensen wrapped his arms around Jared, laughing when the man had to walk awkwardly to accomodate him. The break-room door opened and Jensen was pulled inside. Jared pressed his own back against the door and yanked Jensen closer, kissing him, pressing their bodies close together.

 

Suddenly, there was a low growl and a loud bark. Startled, Jensen spun around, gasping aloud. "What the..."

 

Laying on the floor was a grey, blue-eyed, white-sock pitbull, complete with a leather, spiked collar. Jensen pressed his back against Jared's chest and almost squeaked.

 

"It's a dog," Jared told him.

 

"It's a _pitbull_ ," Jensen clarified.

 

"Thank you, Cesar Millan," he returned. "It's Julius. Turn around."

 

"Who the hell is Julius?"

 

"Julius and Mace," Jared told him. "They're Rock's dogs."

 

"Mace?" he repeated. "There's another one?"

 

"No, Mace is worse. Mace is the _killer_."

 

"Crap, where is he?"

 

Before Jensen could even finish his question, a tiny, brown Chihuahua pranced out from behind one of the armchairs. He wore a leather-and-spike collar, the same as Julius (only much, much smaller) and his tag read MACE in bold black and silver letters. The dog made a growl-whine sound, licked its minute chops and sat down beside the pitbull. It's ears quivered as the little thing trembled beside its massive counterpart.

 

Jensen turned and looked at Jared. "I hate you," he said.

 

Jared laughed, pulling Jensen closer. "No, you don't," he returned. "You're hot for me, and you really _really_ want to get me off in..." He paused long enough to look at his watch. "Eight minutes and thirty-seven seconds."

 

"What?"

 

"What?" He didn't understand why Jensen sounded so exasperated.

 

"You want me to do _that_ to you when the _dogs_ are present?"

 

"Oh, come on," Jared whined. "You're not one of those righteous bastards that think it'll corrupt the _soul_ of the innocent and shit, are you?"

 

Jensen didn't say a word, just looking at him.

 

"Oh, come _on_!" he said again. He rolled his eyes when Jensen continued to be silent, just staring at him. Letting go of him, Jared pushed Jensen back and opened up the door. "Fine," he said, annoyed. "I'll do it myself."

 

Jensen watched Jared leave. He turned to the dogs and smiled at them. He waved and nodded at them. "How's it going?"

 

Julius licked his chops and whined slightly.

 

 

 

 

When he noticed Jared had returned to work, but Jensen hadn't emerged from the breakroom, Chris finally hunted down his best friend. After a good fifteen minutes of petting the dogs, they returned to the bar, the place hopping like mad. Jensen wondered if Jared really _had_ taken matters into his own hands. He didn't look any more satisfied than before, but he didn't look upset either.

 

Chris and Jensen sat down where they had been before, watching the patrons mill about. Jared filled orders, cleaned glasses, stocked coolers. He was in his element, Jensen mentally noted. He was happy. And Jensen loved seeing that.

 

"Hey, beer wench."

 

Annoyed already, Jared turned his head, knowing very well who had spoken the insult to him. Chuck was there, smiling underneath his white, wiry beard. "What, Chuck?"

 

"Get me a Sam Adam's."

 

Jared smiled, more than a hint of sarcasm in the grin. "No."

 

"No?"

 

"No," he repeated. "Rock will serve you."

 

"Fuck him," Chuck snarled. "I want _you_ to get it for me, bitch."

 

Jared straightened, this time his smile a pleased one. "As an employee of this bar, I have the right to refuse anyone I think has had one too many. _You_ could be a danger on the road, Charles."

 

"Fuck you," Chuck snapped at him. "I could be a danger in _here_ , if I don't get my beer, Padalecki."

 

Jared only shrugged, not at all swayed by the vague threat. "Talk to Rock," he advised. "Maybe he'll get you your drink."

 

Chuck grinned wryly at Jared before turning the smile upon Jensen. "Yeah, but _he_ won't suck me off after he does."

 

Jensen watched Chuck's tongue flicker out to wet his lips, and shook his head at the old biker. "Neither will I," he told him.

 

"Don't be so quick to judge, darlin'," Chuck returned. "Jay may have shown you how things work, but I'm willing to bet we can per _fect_ that pretty mouth for suckin' a guy off. I can show you how it _should_ be done."

 

Taking a drink of his beer, Jensen regarded him for a moment. After a second or two, he nodded and swallowed the mouthful of alcohol. "I didn't know you were a fag, Chuck," he said. He hated the word, but that was the only language that Chuck understood, it seemed.

 

With those few words spoken, Chuck's smile quickly vanished.

 

Chris watched from his place, wondering if he was going to have to defend himself. Defend _Jensen_. Jared didn't seem worried, and Jensen was remarkably relaxed. Still, Chris felt himself tense.

 

"So, tell me," Jensen continued, speaking loud enough for surrounding patrons to hear. "Which one of those strapping, not to mention fugly as hell, biker assholes is your bitch?"

 

Jared turned away somewhat, pressing his smile to his own shoulder, stifling his laugh. Chris wasn't as quick to hold back his snort of laughter, instead letting it free and then quickly reigning it in. Jensen smiled at the two of them, moving to take another swig of his beer. 

 

Chuck came towards Jensen, prepared to fight. He slapped the young man's beer away, making it tumble down to the floor behind the bar, where it shattered, sending glass and foam everywhere. Though it had scared him, Jensen was much stronger than he used to be. Angry, he turned and looked at Chuck, readily meeting the old man's eyes. 

 

"Listen to me, you little faggot," Chuck snarled. "You might think you're smarter than me, and you might think that you're God's gift to the fuckin' gays. But all you are is another one of Padalecki's whores. And don't let him fool you. He's had _more_ than his share."

 

Jensen tried to pretend that the old man's words meant nothing. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Rock step closer, handing Chuck a bottle of beer from behind the bar. 

 

"Take your drink and go back to your corner," Rock advised, pushing Chuck back a step or two. "You want another, you talk to me. Jay's off limits. So is Jensen."

 

Chuck finally tore his gaze away from Jensen. He pointed a finger at Jared, the other digits curled around the ice cold Sam Adam's. "This ain't over," he warned.

 

Jared sighed, towelling off his hands. "It never is, Chuck," he said.

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen had become used to Jared working the bar, and not being right there at his side. He became more comfortable at the place, especially with Chris there. They got to hang out, spend some best-friend time together, and Jensen got to share some moments with Jared too. At first, he'd been uncomfortable about showing any affection at the bar -- just because Jared was working there now. But that was quickly wrung out of him. Jared wouldn't have it any other way.

 

By eleven o'clock, Jensen and Chris made their way back up to the bar, after dancing.

 

"You staying until closing?" Jared asked.

 

"Nah," Jensen said. "I had a semi-shitty day today, so I'm going to go home and crash. Chris is going to Dani's, but he'll drop me off on his way."

 

"Okay," he returned. "I'll see you at home, beautiful."

 

Jensen chuckled at him, shaking his head. "Be good," he warned.

 

"Yeah, you _like_ it when I play the bad boy," he said.

 

"Play, yes," Jensen agreed. "Watch your back."

 

"You too."

 

Jensen grabbed his and Chris's jackets from behind the bar, and the two of them headed out. Jared turned back to his work, taking an order from two very pretty girls that had just arrived to the bar. They sounded like they'd already visited one or two other places. Jared decided, however, that they weren't too over the top just yet. He flashed his perfect smile at them and got their orders in record time. Rock had admitted earlier that he and Mickey were pleased with his performance on the job. They had even told Jared that he could stay on for a little longer, and gave him a raise. He wouldn't be rolling in cash, but the nightly tips were nothing to sneeze at, and every little bit helped while Jeffrey was laid up.

 

Jared didn't know what made him look up. Maybe it was a sixth sense. Maybe it was just luck. Whatever the case, after he got the girls their drinks, and one beer for a lonely guy at the end of the bar, he looked over to the corner, where Chuck was.

 

Where Chuck _had_ been. 

 

Panic slithered around Jared's throat like a cold black snake, tightening quickly. Chuck left just after Jensen did, and he wasn't stupid. He knew what that meant. Trying to remain calm, Jared reached for Rock and pulled him close enough to speak into the man's ear. Rock listened and then nodded his head, telling him to go.

 

After clapping a hand on Rock's shoulder, Jared made for the front door. He burst through it, but found the parking lot to be surprisingly quiet. The place was packed, so most of the parking spaces were taken. All of the bikes to Chuck's group were still there, as was Chris's truck, parked off in the distance, underneath one of the lot lamps. No one was in sight, however. Jared took off jogging, looking in between the rows and rows of cars. Jensen was _there_ somewhere, he just knew it. And Chris would be right along side him. "Jen?" he called. He kept jogging, finding nothing curled up and bleeding between the cars. "Jensen!"

 

 

 

 

Jensen looked over at Chuck. Blood trickled down his head, making a dark, red trail between his eyes, along the bridge of his nose. Chris was behind him, held down by the rest of Chuck's goons.

 

"Go ahead, Jenny," Chuck snarled. "Call out to your _girl_ friend."

 

The nickname reminded Jensen of Doug. All the old memories flooded back to him, how he felt when he saw Doug in the same vicinity. How his heart would pound so hard, he was sure it would give out. How the pain made him sick to his stomach. It was those feelings that kept Jensen silent. Instead of calling out for help, he decided that he wasn't going to give into it anymore. He'd had enough of being bullied.

 

He didn't have to call out to Jared, though. His eyes didn't waver from Chuck's, but out of his peripheral vision, he saw a shadow nearing them. Chuck and his goons were so intent upon what they were doing, they didn't even _hear_ Jared nearing them. Not until it was too late. Jensen didn't know if perhaps his gaze finally did shift, or perhaps Chuck finally detected Jared's presence. Either way, the old man snapped his head around just in time for Jared's fist to connect with Chuck's mouth. 

 

Chris fought off the few that had a hold of him, with Jensen's help. Chuck's goons moved to tackle Jared, but the old man waved them off. "He's _mine_!" he nearly yelled at them. With one burly, meaty fist, Chuck swung at him.

 

Jared didn't manage to duck out of the way. He was hit hard enough to be thrown backwards. Blood gushed down his face from his nose, down past his chin and onto his shirt. Still, he was up on his feet in a heartbeat and throwing himself at Chuck. Jensen and Chris caught him, however, just as Rock and two of the bar bouncers rushed in to help. There was an ear-splitting ruckus, confusion all around, horrible words said back and forth, until finally Rock's commanding voice silenced everyone.

 

"That's _enough_!" he shouted. "Jared, back inside. Chuck, get the fuck out of here."

 

"That little asshole--," Chuck began.

 

"You stupid _fuck_!" Jared shouted, lunging at Chuck. He was hauled back by Jensen and Chris. "I'm going to rip your fucking spine out, I swear to God."

 

"You ain't got the _nads_!" he returned. "Come on, asswipe! Try it!"

 

"You fucking _touch_ me or my family again, and I will _kill_ you!" Jared bit back. "I will fucking _kill_ you, do you hear me?"

 

"I said _enough_!" Rock bellowed. 

 

Silence settled over the crowd. People were jammed in the entryway of the bar to see what was going on. Rock hated this kind of publicity. And so did Mickey. Either Jared or Chuck had to go. This couldn't continue. Sighing, Rock waved the bouncers away. "Get him out of my sight," he said. 

 

The bouncers dragged Chuck and his ragged band of friends with him. 

 

Rock looked at Jared and sighed. "Go home, Jared," he said. 

 

"It's still my shift," he said, much calmer this time.

 

Rock shook his head. "You've done enough damage for one night. Go home."


	43. Chapter forty-one

“What the fuck happened?”

 

The question was directed at Jensen as he headed into the kitchen, a hand to his head. Chris was right behind him, with Jared following. Jeffrey watched their progress from his place on the couch, while Stevie reached for the remote and turned off the TV.

 

“Chuck happened,” Jared muttered, now in the kitchen and pulling down a box of bandages and bottles from atop the refrigerator.

 

“Get yourself back in here,” Jeffrey snapped. “And tell me what the hell that’s supposed to mean.”

 

Jared shook his head, but obeyed. He stood opposite Jeff, the dark bruises itching and sore on his face. His shirt was sticky in places and he felt uncomfortable under Jeff’s glare. “Chuck jumped Chris and Jen when they left the bar tonight. So I stepped in.”

 

“And I guess you had _nothing_ to do with _why_ Chuck felt the need to-“

 

“The man was being an asshole, Jeff. I wasn’t just going to stand there and take it. You taught me to stand up for myself and that’s what I did. That’s what Jensen did too. You want to tell me that was wrong?”

 

Jeff looked for a moment like he was about to try and get up, but he ended up shaking his head and turning his gaze on Jensen. “You boys have got to stop getting yourselves in trouble like this,” he said. 

 

“I know,” Jensen mumbled.

 

“You won’t always have friends there to help you out. Since I’m guessing Rock broke the fight up, huh?”

 

“Yeah,” Jared answered. “Don’t worry, he barred Chuck. Which means I shouldn’t see that prick in there again.”

 

“Men like Chuck don’t let being barred from someplace stop them. Watch your back, Jay.”

 

Sensing that Jeff was done with the reprimand, Stevie got up from the couch and took the box from Jared’s hands. 

 

“Come on, guys. Let’s fix you both up.”

 

 

 

 

Jared was back at work the following night, and he told Jensen to stay at home and recover. Jensen didn’t want to, not really, since his planned trip with Chris over to Steve’s new place was to go ahead the next day, Saturday. He wanted to spend as much time with Jared before he went, but the man was insistent and he didn’t have much choice than to give in.

 

He spent the whole evening worrying, sending texts to Jared’s phone and having his heart jump in relief every time he got a message back. Eventually, at around midnight, Jared called him and told him to stop.

 

“I can’t help it. I keep thinking about last night-“

 

“Jen, honestly, I’m fine. Chuck ain’t been in and everyone’s been giving me huge tips because they’ve seen what he did to my face. Rock’s looking after me, so you don’t need to sit there worrying.”

 

“I just wish I was there. I don’t like being away from you.”

 

“You’re away from me tomorrow night,” Jared pointed out.

 

“I know. I know I am and I’m not going to enjoy it one bit.”

 

“Yeah you are,” the other man argued. “You’re going to see one of your old buddies with your very best buddy and you’re probably going to get to sing and you’re _definitely_ going to get offers from a few groupies… Try telling me you didn’t enjoy it when you get back and you’ll be lying.”

 

“Well, true, I guess, but that’s what makes tomorrow night different. At least I’ll have something to distract me.”

 

“Call me if you need to. I get breaks. I’m sure we can work something out.” His voice had dropped to a suggestive and seductive level, making something hot stir in Jensen’s belly.

 

“I may just take you up on that,” he told him, his own voice slightly scratchy with need.

 

“And wait up for me tonight. In case I don’t get to say a proper goodbye in the morning.”

 

 

 

 

Jensen had almost forgotten how much fun it was to be in Chris’s truck for longer than it took to get to school. The last long trip they had done had been a three-hour trek to watch Dani in some cheer-leading competition. This was different. This was just him and Chris and a whole lot of new things that had happened to them. Jensen felt ten years older than that kid from last summer – before the gas station, before Jared and Jeffrey, before _everything_ that he’d been missing in his life. 

 

Chris had a stash of jelly beans on the dashboard and a cooler with bottles of water and plenty of beer (for when they reached Steve’s place) sat between their feet. He had a rock station on the radio and they were both singing along to every song that played, whether they remembered all the lyrics or not. Jensen had his feet up on the dash and drummed his fingers on his thighs in time with the music.

 

“You think Jared’s enjoying his peace and quiet?” Jensen asked, smiling across at Chris.

 

“I think he’s probably missing you like hell. He’ll probably call you soon so you guys can have phone sex.”

 

“Huh. Think that’d be kind of awkward this end. How the hell do you have phone sex anyway?”

 

Chris smirked. “Well, you take your phone, you put it on vibrate, then you-“

 

“Forget it! I know where this is going!”

 

“Up your ass,” Chris finished, laughing wickedly when Jensen reached across and cuffed his arm. 

 

“Lame.”

 

“Do you want to stop for something to eat?” Chris asked, as they passed a sign for a roadside diner a few miles ahead. 

 

“Sounds like a plan,” Jensen replied. He’d missed lunch since they’d set off mid-morning and he was getting kind of hungry.

 

 

 

 

He’d avoided asking until now, but since they were both sat down and it was finally quiet, no music blaring out anywhere, Jensen figured it was a good time.

 

“How come Dani didn’t want to come?” Chris’s smile dropped and he looked down at his plate and Jensen wished right then that he’d kept his mouth shut. “Did something happen between you guys that I missed?”

 

“You didn’t miss it,” Chris said, looking him in the eye again. “I just… Since New Year’s she’s been kind of weird.”

 

Jensen swallowed. “Weird how?”

 

“I’m not sure I oughta tell you.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“’Cause it’s… Look, she’s been kind of obsessing over Jared. And, well, _you_ , but more Jared. And you two together is all she talks about any more.”

 

“Shit. I’m sorry.”

 

“You got nothing to say sorry for. And neither does Jared. Ain’t your fault. Maybe it’s mine for not being good enough for her. Or for telling her…” Chris trailed off and shook his head. “You know what? Never mind. The end result of it is that we’re just taking a break from one another, sorting things through. Hopefully she’ll realise that she needs to stick to straight men. _Single_ men.”

 

“And what about you?”

 

“What _about_ me?”

 

“What is it that you need to work out?”

 

“I thought that was kind of obvious,” Chris muttered, before taking a big bite out of his burger so he wouldn’t have to talk any more.

 

Confused, Jensen returned his attention back to his own meal, too, wishing there was something he could say to fix this. His friend looked miserable suddenly, and he had a feeling that a lot of it was his fault.

 

Jensen paid for the food and for the gas, too, since Chris decided he needed to fill the tank to get them to Steve’s place without stopping again. They didn’t talk too much the rest of the way, which Jensen hated. He wanted everything to be okay and it didn’t look like it would be. Chris changed, though, once they got to the outskirts of the city. He brightened up and turned the radio down so they could check out the passing sights with a little more concentration.

 

“You know where you’re going?” Jensen asked, finally breaking their silence.

 

“Yeah. Steve gave me directions. You want to go straight there or do you want to check out the neighbourhood first?”

 

Jensen knew if they got to Steve’s now then they’d all be shit-faced by the time the show was due to start. And he really wanted to keep Chris sober and hopefully get him talking again, so he opted for exploring town.

 

Chris parked outside a huge mall complex that was still pretty packed out and they found that inside it was indeed busy with families and teenagers who all seemed to stare at Jensen as he went past.

 

“Dude, is my fly undone?” He asked, after a few minutes.

 

“I think it’s more to do with the tattoos and biker boots. Possibly the whole ‘beaten up’ look you got going on,” Chris replied, laughing as the realisation crossed Jensen’s face.

 

“Oh, yeah. I kind of forget, you know?”

 

“Plus all the girls are just checking you out anyway.”

 

“So they can’t tell just by looking that I’m not into girls?”

 

Chris narrowed his eyes in thought at that, then shook his head. “I guess you hide it pretty well.”

 

“Should I be?”

 

Chris came to a halt near the entrance of a clothing store and sighed. Jensen had had enough of this and turned to face his friend, a frown on his face.

 

“Okay, _what_? Obviously I’m not seeing something here, so just tell me.”

 

“It’ll fuck everything up,” Chris told him.

 

“No it _won’t_ ,” Jensen insisted. “Chris, we’ve been best buddies for years. Whatever’s going on with you, believe me. I can handle it.”

 

“I don’t know what’s going on with me, Jen. God, if I did that’d make shit so much easier. I never should’ve kissed you at New Year’s. I didn’t think it would be such a huge deal, but I guess it is.”

 

“No it isn’t.”

 

“To _me_ , Jensen. To me it’s a huge deal. ‘Cause I keep thinking about doing it again and…” He fell silent, ran a hand through his hair. He was full of nervous energy, sweating, and Jensen felt like he’d just been punched in the gut. “Every time you thought I was kidding around. That morning in the garage? Jesus, that was beyond awkward for me. I feel like I have to keep pretending and I hate lying to you, Jen. I really hate it. But I don’t even know what this is. I mean, is there even a name for it? ‘Cause I feel like I still love Dani, I want to be with her, but I don’t want her talking about you and Jay all the time. It makes me jealous and then I don’t know who I’m even jealous _of_ any more.”

 

“Chris-“

 

But he wasn’t finished. “I’m not going to make a move on you, okay? I swear to God I wouldn’t even consider it. You’ve been this insanely happy, confident version of who you used to be ever since you met Jared. And if I did anything to jeopardise you two, I’d never forgive myself. But I just have to make sure you know that I’ve got some stupid crush on you from out of fuckin’ _nowhere_ and I don’t think it’s going away.”

 

Finally he stopped talking and looked up, at Jensen, waiting for him to say something. Truth was, Jensen had no idea what to say. He didn’t want to tell Chris that he’d crushed on him since he figured out he was into guys. It was a friend-crush, some kind of idolisation that he had going on, and he knew that.

 

“What do you want from me?” He asked, eventually, his voice just above a whisper.

 

“I don’t want you to do anything. I just want you to know how goddamned confused I am right now. I just want you to help me out, if you can. If you know how.”

 

“Okay. I promise.”

 

Chris nodded, looked away, then resumed walking. Jensen followed, fell into step beside him, his mind reeling with too many thoughts, all jumbled up like pieces of a jigsaw that wouldn’t fit together. He loved Jared, that was certain, though he loved Chris too. In different ways, sure, but it was still love. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Chris said, as they reached the stairs to go down. “I shouldn’t have said anything. It’s gonna ruin the whole trip.”

 

“No, it’s not,” Jensen argued. “It’ll make it better. ‘Cause at least now I know what’s going on. And, come on dude, we’re going to see Steve tonight! Maybe even chill out and play with him, like before.”

 

“I guess…”

 

“Are you going to tell him?” Jensen asked. 

 

“No, I don’t think so. I just have to work out what this is first.”

 

Jensen shrugged. “You’re just curious, is all. You see me and Jay together so much then of course you’re going to start thinking about what it’s like. Sets you thinking on if _you’ll_ enjoy it or not. How do you think I found out?”

 

“You didn’t know any couples though.”

 

“No, maybe not, but I watched porn on my computer. Just like everyone else.”

 

“Maybe I should try that, huh? See if it turns me on.”

 

“And if it doesn’t then at least you know all you have to deal with is your crush on me.”

 

Chris laughed at that and Jensen felt a surge of relief. Already things were getting better.

 

 

 

 

They ate pretzels and drank coffee a little later, before starting out to Steve’s place. The apartment blocks didn’t look like much from the outside, but on the inside they seemed to be everything a young bachelor might want. It made Jensen think about what it’d be like for him and Jay to have their own place.

 

“Man, I gotta move out,” Chris said, echoing Jensen’s thoughts as they followed Steve to the kitchen for a beer. The other two band members were there too and they were soon heaped on the floor of the living room, drinking beer and talking shit. Steve didn’t ask what had happened to Jensen’s face, which he was grateful for. Explaining the whole Chuck thing just made him fear for Jared even more, and made him miss his boyfriend more desperately.

 

At around seven, Jensen excused himself to the room that he and Chris were bunking in so that he could call Jared before he set off for work. Stevie answered, and he told her that he and Chris were both fine before she went and fetched Jared for him.

 

“Hey, Jen. How was the trip?”

 

Jensen closed his eyes at the sound of Jared’s voice. “Awkward. I miss you.”

 

“Miss you, too. Awkward how?”

 

“Chris is thinking too much.”

 

There was a short silence, followed by a low chuckle. “Thought so.”

 

“You _knew_?”

 

“It’s kind of obvious. And he’s directing it all at you because he trusts you.”

 

“I’m not going to-“

 

“Never said you were. Or that you have to.”

 

“Good.”

 

“Even though that kiss at New Year’s was hot.”

 

“ _Jay_.”

 

“What? I’m not allowed to get turned on watching two guys making out?”

 

“That’s what my computer is for, Jay. Sign into Youtube, for God’s sake. Thinking about you maybe getting off on this is too weird and, besides, it’s not going to happen.”

 

“You’d rather he go experiment with someone who doesn’t know him?”

 

“Why not? I did! Before you, I never even-“

 

“I know you didn’t. But you didn’t have any friends to show you what you were doing. Chris does.”

 

“Anyone would think you were encouraging me to cheat on you.”

 

“It’s not cheating if I know about it. Anyhow, enough about him. What are you wearing?”

 

“Same stuff I was wearing when we left, dumbass,” Jensen answered, not getting the change in topic.

 

“Oh yeah? Take off your shirt.”

 

Jensen coughed. “Dude, where are you?”

 

“I took the phone in the garage. Door’s locked. I’m all alone, naked and hard. And thinking about you.”

 

Jensen quickly looked around at the door. As if someone could hear every word Jared was saying and they were stood there even now, grinning in at him. He was alone. “I don’t know if I can do this,” he confessed.

 

“Sure you can. It’s just a little imagination. You alone?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Close your eyes then, and start touching yourself. Pretend it’s me, that I’m there with you.”

 

Jensen glanced at the door, thought about the likelihood of Chris barging in and finding him with his hands down his pants. “Uh… Hang on.” He went across the hall, Jared murmuring in his ear the whole time, and locked himself in the bathroom where he quickly shed his shirt and pants. “Okay. I’m down to my shorts. What now?”

 

“Just do what I’m doing. Stroke your dick. Imagine it’s my hand. I want to hear you come.”

 

Jensen didn’t think everyone else in the apartment wanted to hear it, but Jared’s voice was _doing_ things to him and he couldn’t help himself. He bit out a low moan and his eyes snapped up to the door as if he expected someone to start pounding on it any moment.

 

“Come on, Jen. Stop worrying about it and let go.”

 

“Jesus,” Jensen said, his tone joking. “Grab my dick, let go, which do you want me to do?”

 

Jared didn’t laugh. “Fuck, I’m so hard for you right now it ain’t even funny. Wish I was buried balls-deep in your ass right now. You want that too, Jen?”

 

Jensen groaned, louder this time, his face going hot at the sound of Jared’s words. Without realising it, he increased the pace of his strokes.

 

“Want you so fucking much. Wish you were right here with me, so you could see…” Jared’s breathing got heavier, shallower, and Jensen struggled to keep a hold on his phone when a long, low moan hummed into his ear. “I’ve got my thumb right where I want your tongue to be, Jen, and I’m imagining the taste of you… God, the taste of you after you’ve sucked me off, made me come with that beautiful, hot mouth of yours…”

 

With a startled cry, Jensen came, shooting over his fist and onto his bare stomach. Jared’s laugh was wicked, delicious.

 

“Oh, yeah, that’s the sound. That’s what I wanted… Fuck…”

 

Jensen blinked to try and clear his vision and his hearing, not really listening to Jared’s drawn-out moan or his gasping straight after he came himself.

 

When Jared spoke again, after several minutes of catching his breath, he sounded hoarse. Satisfied. “Feelin’ better?” He asked.

 

“Yeah,” Jensen replied, shakily. “You?”

 

“I gotta go shower before work. _Again_.”

 

“Hey, it was your idea. Not mine.”

 

Jared had to agree with that. He told Jensen that he had a few ideas for his return the next day, too, and that he’d see him then. He told him also to enjoy the show and to quit worrying about the whole Chris situation so much.

 

“I will, Jay. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

Jensen ended the call and then carefully got to his feet to clean up. He was almost dressed again, his shirt hanging open, when his phone buzzed with a message. The words nearly made him choke. It was from Jared and it just said, ‘GOT THE WHOLE THING ON VIDEO SO YOU CAN SEE WHAT YOU DID TO ME WHEN YOU GET BACK’. He must have been _waiting_ for the call, Jensen thought.

 

He went out to the spare room again and found Chris was in there now, digging through his duffel for the shirt he’d brought along for the show. Jensen tried not to think about Jared’s words as his gaze swept along the smooth, tanned curve of Chris’s back. This whole deal was so unfair, he thought.

 

“Hey, you showered?”

 

“Figured I’d let you go in first,” Jensen replied.

 

“You okay?” Chris asked, turning fully and taking a good look at him.

 

“I’m fine. Go get ready, before Steve starts nagging at the both of us.”

 

He watched Chris go and then sat heavily on his bed, his head in his hands. He was so screwed.

 

 

 

 

They were soon both ready, waiting for Steve to shower while the rest of the band made their way to the venue. Steve would go in Chris’s truck with him and Jensen, to show them the way and to catch up on anything else that he’d missed. Chris had dressed in ripped blue jeans and a short-sleeved black shirt with popper buttons and a silver tattoo design printed on the bottom edge. He looked good. Jensen tried hard not to concentrate on that fact. He was starting to wish that he’d never forced Chris to tell him what was wrong. He especially wished that he’d never mentioned it to Jared. Because getting permission from your boyfriend to take something if you wanted to was just dirty and _wrong_. 

 

Jared had had a point, though. If Chris really was so confused about this, maybe it _was_ better that he work it through with someone he knew and trusted than with a complete stranger.

 

He was kind of disappointed that Jared hadn’t been more possessive, though, but not as surprised as he might have been. Either Jared really got off on the idea of Chris and Jensen so much that he didn’t care, or he was so confident that Jensen loved him enough to not go any further with the cheating, that he thought it didn’t matter. The other possibility wasn’t one that Jensen thought applied.

 

“You’re lookin’ at me like you’re tryin’ to put a hole in me. With your mind.”

 

Jensen focused, smiled at Chris apologetically. “Sorry, man. I was thinking.”

 

“Not about…” Chris sighed. “Seriously, man, forget about it. It’s out there, we both know, so just forget about it. Stop worrying.”

 

“I’m not worried,” Jensen said, honestly. “Just really fuckin’ confused.” He rubbed his temples, shook his head. “Ugh. Ignore me. I’m just being a dick about it. Let’s just… You know…”

 

“Pretend it never happened?” Chris finished.

 

“That’s not what I was going to say.”

 

“It’s what _I’m_ saying. We’ll enjoy the show and tomorrow I’ll call Dani and tell her I’m an idiot. Okay?”

 

Feeling miserable again, Jensen didn’t answer. Because he realised that that wasn’t what he wanted at _all_.

 

 

 

 

The show was impressive. Steve managed to get Chris out with him for a couple of songs, playing the guitar just like he’d been born to. Jensen sang along from the sidelines, enjoying himself without a care. It was a damned good night and, even though he still wished Jared could be here, he was gladder than ever that he’d agreed to come.

 

As the after-show drinks wound down, though, he found himself tiring. It was only one, but he had done plenty of travelling with Chris earlier and he was bushed. Steve looked happy to go for several more hours, though, so he gave Jensen his apartment key and told him to head back if he wanted.

 

“What about you?”

 

“I’ll be back sooner or later. Count on later,” he added, winking as the small brunette he’d been talking to for the last hour tugged on his arm.

 

Which meant going back alone with Chris. Being alone with Chris. Which Jensen was growing ever more certain was going to lead to something. Chris drove them back, looking thankful to be leaving the party. He hadn’t been drinking all night, but he was just as tired as Jensen which meant that he didn’t really want to.

 

They got inside and Jensen locked up behind them, while Chris leant against the wall and pulled off each of his boots in turn.

 

“You want another drink?” Jensen asked, fiddling with the key in his hands.

 

“This is gonna make me sound like an old man, but do you think he’s got any tea anywhere? I could seriously go for some tea.”

 

“I’ll take a look. Get ready for bed, man, you look like you’re about to drop.”

 

Chris nodded sleepily in agreement and headed for the spare room. By the time Jensen got there, with two steaming mugs of tea, Chris was already under the covers of his bed. The quilt was pulled up to his waist and Jensen tried not to stare at the warm skin that was on show above it. Apparently he didn’t do a great job of that as Chris frowned at him and said his name.

 

“Yeah?”

 

“What the hell’s going on here?”

 

“You really want me to tell you? Or should I just show you?”

 

Chris searched Jensen’s eyes for a moment or two. “Tell me,” he said, not looking away.

 

“Jay said… God, this is so fucked up. He-“

 

“He said it was okay, didn’t he?” Chris interrupted. “Your boyfriend is all _kinds_ of fucked up, Jen, or didn’t you notice that yet?”

 

“He’s not, not really. He made a lot of sense. Said that it wasn’t cheating on him if he knew. He said it would help you out if you, I don’t know, experimented with someone you trust.”

 

Chris’s eyes narrowed. “Did he really say that, or is that just a ploy to get into my pants?”

 

“Chris, no.” Jensen sighed, sitting on the edge of his bed and setting the mug on the floor between his feet. “I’m not… I don’t want to give you something that you don’t want from me.”

 

“I don’t know _what_ I want,” Chris said.

 

Jensen got up, moved across the bedroom to where he lay. He took the mug of tea out of Chris’s hands and put it on the nightstand by his bed.

 

“Okay, what’re you doing?”

 

“Something you’ve been wanting me to do since New Year’s,” Jensen told him. He rested a hand on Chris’s shoulder, gentle, and settled down in the space between his hip and the edge of the mattress. Chris started to protest as Jensen leaned over him, but once their mouths touched he shut up completely. Chris parted his lips, his eyes closing, and Jensen took full advantage. It was different from kissing Jared, he thought. Not in the simple ways, but in the ways that he had gotten used to.

 

He knew it was because Chris was only used to kissing Dani that he was being more careful than Jared ever was. He was keeping it soft and Jensen felt a need to show him that it didn’t matter. This was what Chris wanted, after all. To see what the difference was with a guy. So Jensen pulled back a little, biting his teeth down on Chris’s bottom lip and tugging on it until he heard the other man moan.

 

He took control, fingertips gripping the muscles of Chris’s arms tightly, almost painfully, as he kissed him. He allowed himself to be brutal, bruising Chris’s mouth with his tongue and his teeth. This was more like what kissing Jared was like when they both really went for it. There were differences, still, but no longer in the kiss itself. Just in the way Jensen felt while he kissed. He fisted his hand in Chris’s hair, getting a good grip, and forced his head back. Pressed a biting kiss to Chris’s chin and watched his eyes as he pulled away. 

 

His friend’s pupils were wide, his face flushed red with heat. He was breathing harshly and there was sweat beading all along his brow. Jensen let go of his hair to run his thumb over the dampness and Chris closed his eyes at the touch. He let out a shaky breath before he opened them again, and Jensen took that as a good cue to sit back.

 

There was a long silence before Chris met his eyes full on and said, quietly, “Wow.”

 

“So does this mean I’m going to have Dani hunting me down after we get back?”

 

Chris tried to laugh, almost made it. “Maybe with a camera. Maybe begging you to do that again.”

 

“Her or you?”

 

In answer, Chris reached around the back of Jensen’s neck and ran his thumb over the scruff of hair at his nape. Then he pressed down, making Jensen lean down again, and opened his mouth for another kiss.

 

Before he realised he was doing it, Jensen was pushing the covers down around Chris’s waist. He palmed the hard ridge of Chris’s dick, rubbing the cotton of his boxers in a steady motion. He half expected Chris to punch him out, ask him what the fuck he was doing, but he didn’t. He just shifted his ass, opened his legs, and moaned into Jensen’s mouth. Just as well, he thought. Because if he _had_ asked just what the fuck he was doing, Jensen wasn’t sure he would have had an answer. Now he had an invitation and he took advantage of it, moving his fingers down to squeeze Chris’s thigh and then sliding them into one loose leg of his shorts to gently stroke the hot flesh underneath. Chris just about choked on his tongue and pulled away from their kiss to catch his breath.

 

“You want me to?” Jensen whispered, and Chris nodded like there was no question about it. And Jensen hesitated, because this was definitely no-turning-back territory. A hand job was a huge step up and if he got really carried away then… Well, _then_ , he thought, this whole thing was really fucked. The feel of a hot tongue and teeth nipping at his jaw reminded him that he’d stopped and the next thing he knew, Chris was pushing himself up from the bed so he could push his shorts down his legs.

 

“You’re not going to judge me on the size of my dick, are you?” Chris asked. He was trying to joke around, but Jensen could feel that he was tense as hell and scared, too. He pressed a warm hand to the other man’s ribs, stroking back and forth in what he hoped was a calming manner.

 

“Of course not, idiot,” he said, his voice soft. “So does Dani ever go down on you?”

 

Chris’s breath hitched at the question. He bit his lip and shook his head. “No. Once. It was… Yeah. Not a great success.”

 

“Do you want me to try it?”

 

“ _Fuck_.” His eyes went wide and he stared at Jensen’s hand on his belly. “If… God. Yes.”

 

Jensen wondered if this was overstepping the bounds of what Jared had meant, but he couldn’t help himself now. He had a feeling that, had Jared been there, he would have been getting plenty of encouragement from his boyfriend to do this. The thought made his dick stir again. He ignored it, moving his hand down Chris’s stomach, scratching his short nails through dark hairs, and then taking a firm grip of his friend’s cock. He stroked up a couple of times, enjoying the fact that this whole deal was making him feel like he was actually _good_ at this, and then he bent his head to suck at Chris’s nipple, kiss a slow, wet trail down his abs.

 

“Jesus…” Chris said, his voice shaking, when Jensen’s mouth finally slipped over the head of his cock. He wasn’t as big as Jared, which was definitely a good thing in Jensen’s eyes. Jensen had tried to get the whole of Jared’s dick in his mouth once and had about passed out before Jared told him to stop being an idiot and just get him off already. With Chris, he managed it. He breathed through his nose when he felt the head touch the back of his throat and Chris let go a gritty keening noise.

 

Jensen closed his eyes, focusing his concentration on what he was doing. His nails pressed into Chris’s thighs as he held him down and sucked at his dick. When Chris lost it, _really_ lost it, and started fucking up into his mouth, he changed position quickly and used his tongue to stop Chris from choking him.

 

Apparently that was too much as Chris shouted out and Jensen drew back enough to swallow as Chris came. He hummed around his dick as he licked him clean, feeling the tremors across his skin underneath his fingertips. Chris’s stomach was heaving as he tried to breathe and Jensen released him, kissing his stomach and licking his lips. He moved onto his side and shifted position until he was laid out next to Chris, staring at the ceiling as they both calmed down.

 

“You okay?” He asked, eventually, needing to break the silence and wanting Chris to say something.

 

“Yeah, I… Do you want me to, uh-“

 

“You don’t have to. Seriously, Chris, I’m good.”

 

They were quiet again after that and it didn’t take long before Chris’s breathing evened out and the sound of it lulled Jensen to sleep as well.

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen woke to the sound of Steve’s phone ringing. He’d fallen asleep with Chris, both crammed into one bed, and the other man woke up as soon as Jensen started to move. Chris let him go and he hurried through the apartment to answer the phone. It was Steve.

 

“You guys okay there for another couple hours before you go?”

 

“Yeah,” Jensen assured him. “We’re good. Take it you stayed over with the cute chick from last night?”

 

He could hear the smug grin in Steve’s voice when he answered. “Sure did. She’s just in the shower now so I figure I’ll surprise her for another round, grab some breakfast and then be home to see you guys off. Shame Chris didn’t join me. She’s got a really hot friend.”

 

“More for you, Steve, huh?”

 

“Hey, I’m not a slut! So, you two okay?”

 

“Uh, yeah. Why d’you ask?”

 

Steve laughed, confused. “Just making sure you slept all right, that’s all. Why, did something happen?”

 

“No,” Jensen said, quickly. “We just crashed out. You just woke me up, actually.”

 

“Sorry man. Look, I’ll be back in an hour, hour and a half maybe. I’ll see you before you go.”

 

“You kind of need to, since we still have your keys.”

 

“No problem. See you soon.”

 

Jensen hung up and went straight to the bathroom, desperate for a piss now. Chris came in while he was setting the temperature for his shower and shaved at the sink while Jensen got clean. There was nothing weird or awkward about it, which honestly surprised Jensen. He had thought there might be more avoidance than this. But, if anything, the experience of getting his best friend off, of helping him realise that yes, okay, maybe he didn’t mind making out with guys as well as girls, had actually strengthened their bond. Somehow. Like how it wasn’t embarrassing to be naked and wet in the same room. Or how it wasn’t embarrassing to realise that his friend actually had a fucking nice body and he’d gotten a taste of it.

 

He wondered if Chris would tell Dani about this. He doubted it. He knew for sure that he wouldn’t get away with not telling Jared.

 

Chris took over the shower while Jensen dressed and got the coffee going, and by the time he was dried and dressed himself Jensen had packed all their stuff away and thrown their sheets in the washer. He thanked Jensen for the coffee and leaned against the kitchen counter to drink it, watching Jensen over the rim of his mug.

 

“What?”

 

“Just thinkin’ what a lucky son-of-a-bitch Jared is,” Chris said, smiling.

 

“We still gotta get my ego back home so you can stop any time,” Jensen warned him, returning the smile with a slightly amused one of his own.

 

“I need to find a man with a mouth like yours is all.”

 

“Hey, I was shit at blowjobs until I started getting the practice in. That’s all you need.”

 

“I guess so. You should start a master class or something.”

 

Jensen laughed, smacked his friend’s arm as he leaned on the counter beside him. “You wouldn’t be saying that if you’d ever had Jared suck you off,” he informed him. “That guy could suck moss off a boulder.”

 

“I bet. Your boyfriend’s kind of a perv.”

 

“Kind of,” Jensen agreed, nodding. 

 

“Hey, Jen?”

 

He didn’t need telling that Chris was about to ask something he really wasn’t sure about. It was in the tone of his voice and Jensen knew him well enough by now to sense such a thing. He turned to put his mug down on the counter beside him and then looked up.

 

“What?”

 

“I was thinking.”

 

“About what?” He knew he sounded edgy, but he was, and he wasn’t going to hide it.

 

“Last night. It was unbelievably fucking good, but it didn’t really… You know.”

 

“Didn’t really _what_?”

 

“You took care of everything. So I don’t know.” He stopped, like he was halfway through saying something else, and then he turned slightly and leaned across and covered Jensen’s mouth with his own. He kept the kiss light until he felt Jensen respond, and then his hand came up to hold Jensen’s jaw and he put his own mug down beside them so he could use his other hand to tease through wet hair. He kissed him, slow and wet, tasting of coffee and warmth.

 

Jensen didn’t realise that Chris’s hand was moving until he felt it tugging at the buckle of his belt. He ducked out of the kiss then, looking down.

 

“What’re you doing?”

 

“What does it look like? C’mon, I’m not going to know if I can do this to a guy if I can’t do it to you.”

 

Jensen briefly wondered if this would be the point where things would start to go wrong, but then Chris had his belt undone, and his fly unzipped, and his hand was wrapped around Jensen’s dick, squeezing. At least, he thought, Chris wasn’t down on his knees and offering to blow him. He didn’t think his brain could have handled that.

 

Chris didn’t seem to even be considering it. He went back to kissing Jensen while he stroked his dick to hardness and he used his thumb the way Jensen had used his tongue last night. He wasn’t sure if it was because of who was doing it, or where they were stood, or just because of the fact he hadn’t gotten himself off last night and he _needed_ this, badly, but Jensen could feel his knees weaken after only five minutes or so. He reached one hand back, grasping onto the edge of the counter, and gasped into Chris’s mouth as he felt it starting. Blood rushed in his ears, sounding loud, and he felt himself tighten up for an instant. Then everything was opened up and he tore his mouth from Chris’s, leaning his head on his friend’s shoulder and breathing out hard against his neck as he came.

 

He shuddered back against the countertop, feeling it dig into his ass. Chris stopped moving his hand, but held it there, and Jensen had to tell him to move it because he couldn’t stand the pressure of it. 

 

“Was that-“

 

“Just. Shut up.” Jensen hissed into Chris’s skin, then lifted his head slowly, sleepily, his dry mouth dragging over the other man’s throat. “Yeah,” he said, blinking. “It was.”

 

Chris gave him a look that might have said, ‘ha, I’m so fucking awesome’, and then reached around him for the kitchen towel that was draped across the counter. He wiped his hand off and passed the cloth to Jensen so he could clean himself up.

 

Jensen fastened his jeans again, willing himself to calm down, and found himself smiling like he’d just heard the world’s greatest secret.

 

“What?” Chris asked, puzzled and trying not to laugh.

 

“Did that satisfy your curiosity?” He asked.

 

“I think so.”

 

“And you came to some kind of decision?”

 

Chris did laugh this time. “Yeah. I reckon I did, too.”

 

“Good. And… You know. Thanks.”

 

 

 

 

They ate some breakfast and Steve arrived as Jensen was using what he’d found in the refrigerator to make sandwiches for him and Chris to take on their trip back home. He threw an arm around Jensen’s shoulders and pressed a sloppy kiss to his cheek, laughing when Jensen pushed him away and told him he was a pervert.

 

“I had a good night. Just sharing in the happiness.”

 

“Sure, sure. We had a good time too, Steve. Thanks for having us.”

 

“Hey, you guys are welcome any time, you know that. And Jared too. Chris keeps going on about how cool the guy is. Sure would be nice to see him sometime.”

 

“Maybe in a few weeks. Sure he’ll get a Saturday night off soon.”

 

“That’d be good. So, you guys are off now?”

 

“We are. Chris is just checking we didn’t leave anything behind.”

 

As if on cue, Chris reappeared and shared a hug with Steve while Jensen wrapped the sandwiches and found a bag to put them in.

 

“Guess we’d better get going,” he said, when Steve let him go.

 

“Guess you better had. I’ll see you again soon, I hope. I mean it.”

 

Jensen nodded, already looking forward to their next trip here, and then they were heading for the door, shouldering bags and exchanging insults with Steve all the way down to the truck.

 

 

 

 

“Are you going to tell Jay?” Chris asked, about an hour down the road.

 

Jensen shrugged. “I probably won’t need to. He seems to guess everything about me that he doesn’t already know.”

 

Chris gazed out at the road ahead in silence for a minute or two, chewing on his bottom lip. “You think he’ll be pissed about it?”

 

“No.” Jensen felt that answer was the truth, too. After what Jay had said to him, he was sure that this wasn’t going to be an issue. Especially since he had no intention of ever repeating it. Well. Maybe the kissing, but definitely not the whole hand-on-his-dick thing. And, oh fuck, he was getting kind of hard just thinking about it again.

 

“I hope not.”

 

“What about you and Dani?”

 

Chris choked out a laugh. “Yeah. I really don’t know. I love that girl, I know it, but if she finds out about this then I’ll never hear the end of it.”

 

“If she finds out about it, then it won’t be from me,” Jensen promised.

 

“Thanks. I… Thank you.”

 

They were nearing their halfway stop when Jensen’s phone started ringing. Chris turned the radio down as he answered, and Jensen smiled in gratitude while he flipped the phone open.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Jensen, are you and Chris on your way back?”

 

Something in the tone of Jeff’s voice had him alert in an instant. “Yes. Yeah, we’ve got about two and a half hours left to go. Is everything okay?”

 

Now Chris looked worried and Jensen thought he pressed down on the gas that little bit harder.

 

“Get back here as soon as you can, both of you.”

 

“What’s _happened_?” Jensen asked, frantic.

 

“I’m not talking about this over the phone with you, Jensen.” Jeff’s voice was sharp and Jensen knew then that whatever it was, it was bad. “Just get Chris to bring you straight home.”

 

Jeff hung up before Jensen could say anything else and as Chris asked what was going on, his voice seeming distant, he couldn’t escape the feeling that his world was about to fall out from under him.


	44. Chapter forty-two

  
Author's notes: Here's three more chapters... only six more to go!  
_____________________  


* * *

Work had been a bitch. While Jared was thankful that Chuck hadn't shown, there had been two bachelor parties in one night. By the time closing hour arrived, Jared was ready to punch the brick wall out in the alleyway. Both bachelor parties had gotten way out of control. Strippers had been called, and Rock flipped. He was all for a girl showing a little skin, as was Jared, but they didn't have the licenses for such a thing. He had to throw the girls out, and _threaten_ to throw the guys out. By the end of the night, patrons _and_ bouncers were a little bloodied.

After everyone was cleared out, Rock poured three deep glasses of scotch. He passed one to Jared, one to Darlene, and kept one for himself. Jared had never been so happy to see an alcoholic beverage before in his life.

It took them nearly two hours to clean up and close shop. When they were finally done, and Rock had given him the go ahead, Jared hopped on his bike and headed back home. On the way there, he decided to stop and get a six-pack to waste away the rest of the night with. The scotch Rock had poured him had done a good job of evening out his nerves, but he wanted more. He was all alone for the night anyway, and Jensen wasn't. He replayed Jensen's phone call in his mind. He really was okay with Jensen showing Chris a few things, mostly because he knew -- without a doubt -- that Jensen was his. They had repeatedly told each other how they felt about one another.

Well, sort of. Jared was still working on saying those three stupid words that he found so difficult. The only people he'd ever said such a thing to were his Mom and Jeffrey. But Jensen _knew_ how Jared felt. And Jared vowed to tell him what he wanted to hear when he got home from his road trip with Chris.

It was cold when he walked out of the liquor store. His breath clouded around his head as he walked towards the motorcycle. Jared knew he shouldn't drive, even after just one drink, and Jeffrey would kill him if he found out, but he couldn't leave the bike in the lot all night. Someone would vandalize it. Staggering just slightly, he fished in his pocket for the bike keys, belching out that last swallow of scotch.

Before he even got on the motorcycle, sirens blared, lights flashed in blue and red. Spotlights were trained on him and, for a moment, he felt blinded. Cops jumped out of their vehicles, two at a time, and aimed their pistols at him, taking shelter behind the open car doors. Jared squinted and raised his arm to shield his eyes to the too-bright lights. He saw a familiar figure step into the lights, silhouetted. Out of habit and alarm, he raised his hands to show he was of no threat.  
  
The silhouette came closer, revealed to be his old parole officer. Jared's first thought was, _Aw, shit._ He quickly remembered the old feeling of fight-or-flight, adrenaline coursing through his system. And then he wondered how on earth so many cops had found him so quickly -- and what they thought he had done that made them work so swiftly and silently.

"Bill?"

Bill nodded. "Jared," he said, no-nonsense in his stern voice.

He remembered the last time he'd seen and talked to the old man. "I didn't park illegally this time," he said, his hands still raised. "You got all this firepower out for nothing."

"This isn't about parking," he assured him. "Trust me."

"Okay, so I had _one_ drink, dude. I'm not really drunk, I swear."

"Jared, this is more serious than that."  
  
"You think?" he nodded, angry sarcasm lacing his words. "Maybe you'd like to tell me why you have half the fucking force out there pointing guns at me?"

"Chuck is dead, Jared."

Simply put. Easy to understand. Yet, it didn't stop Jared from laughing aloud. "Yeah," he nodded. "I fucking _wish_."

Bill shook his head. "Jared," he said, no humor in his voice. "Chuck's dead."

Sober in a heartbeat, Jared's laughter subsided and he stared at the parole officer. "So, why are you telling _me_?"

Shifting his weight on his feet, Bill sighed. "Word has it, you two had a go at each other at Mickey's just recently. He messed up your bike, I hear."

"You have your goons on me because of word of fucking _mouth_?" he snapped. He couldn't believe it. When he finally straightens up, finds the life he wants and _tries_ to straighten up, he gets accused of fucking _murder_?

Bill held up a hand. "Jared, calm down," he said. "You know me. You know I'm fair. But with the evidence we've got, and your priors..."

Doing as he was told Jared calmed himself a little, taking a deep breath and nodding his head "Which is why they sent you," he said. "Because you know my priors. This is _bullshit_."

"They sent me because you _know_ me," he clarified. "They know you'll listen to me."

"You think I _did_ this?"

"I don't know, Jared."

"Well, what if I don't listen to you?" he challenged. "I'm being _wrongly accused_ , Bill. What if I just turn around and run?"

Bill shook his head. "I wouldn't advise that, kiddo," he said with a frown. "There's a lot of firepower pointed at you right now. I'd like you to do what I say. Put your hands behind your head. Interlock your fingers, and go down to your knees, Jared."

He didn't move for a second or two, gritting his teeth. He breathed in the cool night air, clearing his head but not his sick stomach. This was bullshit, but he couldn't talk his way out of it. He knew Bill, and Bill wouldn't take no for an answer. Jaw muscles flexing, he interlocked his fingers behind his head and lowered himself to his knees. Bill moved closer, taking the bike keys from him. Jared winced when he felt Bill pull his arms around behind his back, closed his eyes in defeat when he felt the bite of the cuffs at his wrists.

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Hello?"

"Jensen."

Jensen pressed the phone against his ear, harder this time, to drown out the sound of the engine noise and the static on the line. Something in the tone of Jeffrey's voice had him on edge almost immediately. "Jeff?" he asked. He glanced over at Chris, worried.

Chris looked instantly worried too. He kept glancing over at Jensen as he drove.

"Jensen, are you and Chris on your way back?"

He looked around, trying to find a road sign that would give him a landmark to tell. "Yes," he mumbled for a moment. "Yeah, we’ve got about two and a half hours left to go. Is everything okay?"  
  
Chris set his foot down almost to the floor. Fuck two hours. He'd have Jensen home sooner. He glanced back over to him, a pang of anxiety washing over him when he heard Jensen's desperate voice ask, "What's _happened_?"

Jeffrey apparently didn't have anything good to say. He left Jensen hanging, didn't even say goodbye. Jensen took the phone away from his ear, looked down at the phone and then closed it. It took him a few minutes to turn towards Chris, but when he did, Chris's stomach knotted from the look in Jensen's eyes.

"What?" Chris asked.

Jensen shook his head. "I don't know," he answered. "But I have a _bad_ feeling about this."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

" _Murder_?" Jensen still couldn't believe it. It was ridiculous.

"That's what I said."

Alan fucking Ackles. Why the hell had _he_ been the one to be called?

Jeffrey and Jensen hadn't been allowed to see Jared right away. The cops told them that they would get to see him as soon as possible. Jeffrey offered to call Stevie in to drive Jensen home, knowing the night would be a long one, but Jensen wanted to stay. Chris returned home by Jensen's command. Before he left, however, Chris made Jensen promise to call him if he needed _anything_.

By a little after eight in the morning, Jared was brought out to see them. Along with his lawyer.

Alan fucking Ackles.

Laughing in annoyance, Jensen shook his head. "You've gotta be kidding me," he said. " _You_ can't represent him."

"Why not?"

"Because you _hate_ him."

Jared said nothing. He only watched his adoptive father and Jensen glare over at his defense lawyer.

"I will represent my client to the best of my ability," Alan said haughtily.

"He didn't _do_ it," Jeffrey interrupted said, leaning on his crutches.

"That remains to be seen by the court, Mister Morgan."

"No, it doesn't," he returned. "He didn't kill Chuck. That bastard was wanted dead by a lot of people, but not Jared."

Alan shook his head. "Witnesses heard Mister Padalecki threaten the victim," he said.

"What? Where?"

"Mickey's Motorcycle Club? It's on--"

"I _know_ where it is," Jeffrey snarled. He shifted uncomfortably on his one good leg. They'd sat in hard chairs and on rigid benches for far too long, but he wasn't about to leave until he had something more to go on.

Jensen grumbled, turning away from his father, Jared and Jeffrey. This was such bullshit.

"Jensen?"

He turned around again, looking at Jeffrey. "Yeah, he said it," he returned. "But it was… It was just _Jared_."

Still expressionless and speechless, Jared sat at the interrogation table, staring down at the shiny finish.

"Jared," Alan spoke, his voice remarkably calm. "Is there anything you'd like to say at this time?"

There was no answer.

Jensen glanced over at Jeffrey, a world of conversation in their eyes, and then turned his gaze back to Jared. "Aren't you going to say _anything_?" Jensen asked, annoyed.

Jared only blinked. Wouldn't even _look_ at Jensen. He stared down at the table, appearing broken and beaten.

Clenching his jaw, Jensen looked at his father. "Can I talk to you alone for a minute?"

Alan actually thought about the offer for a moment before he finally agreed. "Alright."

Jensen didn't like the look of satisfaction in the man's eyes. Outside the room, he walked several feet away from the door so there was no risk of Jared overhearing their conversation. Angry, he turned to glare at Alan. "What the hell are you doing?" he snapped.

"I'm working, Jensen," he said coolly. "I'm a defense lawyer. I'm doing my job."

"Bullshit," he snarled. "You could have -- normally _would_ have sloughed this kind of low-life job onto one of your lackeys. Are you taking this just to ruin him?"

"I will defend Mister Padalecki in this case."

He wasn't buying it. "Why?"

"Because he asked me to."

"Bullshit," he said again.

"That is _quite_ enough, young man," Alan reprimanded.

Jensen smirked at him, taking a step closer. "You don't get to tell me that stuff anymore, _Alan_. Or, maybe you don't remember calling me, half drunk, to tell me you didn't want to claim me as your son anymore?"

It was silent between them for a second. Alan stood tongue-in-cheek for several moments, trying to calm what Jensen had riled up inside of him. "I remember," he finally replied. "But I'm doing all of this to remedy that."  
  
He couldn't believe his father's audacity. "You think that _this_ is going to set things right between us?" he asked, shaking his head and narrowing his eyes. "This all didn't just start happening when I met Jay. This stuff has been building between us for _years_. Jay and Jeff, they just gave me the courage to stand up to you like I should have done years ago."

His jaw muscles flexed as he clenched his teeth and listened to his son. Finally, a reaction Jensen was used to. Once Jensen was silent again, Alan nodded his head and smoothed down his tie, just out of habit more than any real need. "That may be," he said. "But the deal is already in motion."

Jensen was suddenly terrified. Wide-eyed, he stared over at his father. "What did you do?"  
  
Unblinking, Alan gazed at his son. "What I had to do," he answered. "Your mother misses you, Jensen. And she blames me."

Fury set in again, and Jensen set his hands against his father's chest, shoving him backwards. "What did you _do_?" he repeated, nearly yelling.

Alan regained his footing and glared at Jensen. He straightened his suit coat, swiped his tongue over his front teeth. He despised the tone his son was using, but he let it go for the time being. "In exchange for your freedom, I've agreed to do my best with Mister Padalecki."

"In exchange for my _freedom_?" Jensen sneered. "I'm not a goddamn prisoner of war, _Alan_."

Furious, Alan pointed a finger in Jensen's face. "You are my _son_ , and I will do whatever I need to do to protect you."

As Alan's hand returned to his side, Jensen smiled. That motion, that one finger pointed at him, used to scare him, put him right back in line so that he flew straight as an arrow. Not anymore. He took a step closer and glared into Alan's eyes. "Protect _me_ , or your name?" he asked. " _Dad_." Turning, he made to walk away.

"Jensen."

He stopped and turned towards his father again, not saying anything.

"Do this," Alan told him. "Come home, and I will do everything I can to get Jared out of this."

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jeffrey rested his crutches against the wall and hobbled over to the table. He sat down across from Jared and stared at him for several seconds, trying to figure out what was going through the boy's head. "Jared," he finally said.

He said nothing.

" _JT_."

Still silent, Jared met Jeffrey's eyes, his own dark and angry.

"What are you _doing_ , dude?" Jeffrey asked. He frowned when Jared only looked away from him, either refusing or just not knowing _how_ to answer the question. "They're saying you killed Chuck."

Jared met Jeffrey's eyes again, but did not deny the claim.

Jeffrey sighed. "Honestly, kiddo, I wouldn't put it past you," he said. "You've got some serious anger issues at times. And the way you've been about him lately..." A reprimand wasn't going to help, he suddenly decided. He took a deep breath, rested his hands atop the table, and exhaled slowly. "I know you, Jared," he continued in apology. "You didn't do this."

"I know," he finally said.

"Then tell me what the hell is going _on_."

"I made a deal."

That worried Jeffrey. "What kind of deal?"

"With his father."

"Ackles?"

Jared nodded, staring down at the table top. "I agree to let Jen go, and he helps me out with this," he said. "He's a top lawyer. He'll do his best."

The last two sentences sounded canned, rehearsed. Jeffrey squinted at Jared, confused. "If you agree to _let_ Jensen _go_?"

He shrugged. "That was the deal."

"And you agreed to it," he almost snapped. "Like you were some sort of rampaging pedophile that snatched Jensen out of his bedroom window during the night."

Animation suddenly jolted into Jared. He came to life, leaning forward and looking at Jeffrey. "Do I look like I have a choice in the matter?" he asked, his tone sharp. "His goddamn father waltzed in here first thing and told me we were gonna have a _talk_. I _told_ him my alibi. I was at Mickey's that night. Trevor was with me. But it wasn't all night, and Trev can't vouch for me the whole time. Yeah, I hate Chuck. And the fact that he's dead doesn't upset me in the least. He got what he deserved. I didn't kill him, but no one cares about that. Someone says they saw someone who _might've_ been me, and I take the fall. And the only way out of it is to make _this_ piece of shit bargain."

Jeffrey listened, still rather stunned.

"Think about it, Jeff," he continued, narrowing his eyes and tapping a finger to his forehead. "Jensen has a good life with them. Why, for fuck's sake, should he give all that up for me?"

The stunned look turned to one of sadness. Jeffrey's shoulders fell and he shook his head. "Because he _loves_ you, you stupid ass."

Jared reclined in his seat again, sighing. "Yeah, well," he said, still angry. "Maybe he shouldn't."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"You against cell phones now?"

Jensen turned. He saw Chris standing in the doorway that led to the kitchen. The door was closed, and Chris had on his usual thick-soled boots. Jensen wondered what planet he'd been on that he'd not heard him walk in. "Hey," he said. "What?"

"Cell phones," Chris said, moving down the stairs, further into the garage. "They're a nifty little invention that lets people communicate any time they need to?"

"Oh, sorry," Jensen said. He turned back to the pile of clothes on the sofa, sorting them. "I turned it off."

"Yeah, I got that," he nodded, "when I got your voice mail for the fiftieth time."

"Sorry."

Chris watched Jensen sort the clothes on the sofa. He recognized some of the articles as Jared's, some as Jensen's. He noticed a bag off to the side, and could see some of Jensen's clothes inside, folded neatly. "What's going on?"

Jensen didn't look at him. He scratched at his eyebrow with a thumbnail, something Chris knew was a nervous habit Jensen had always had, and folded a faded red tee. "I just..." He paused, clearly having a hard time with thinking straight right then. "I just need to get out of here for awhile."

Chris walked over to the bag and opened it up. "Looks like more than just a while," he noted. "Where’re you going to?"

Sniffling through his nose, Jensen cleared his throat. He placed the red tee in the duffel bag and reached for another to fold. "Home," he said.

Chris chuckled. "Home, where?"

" _Home_ -home."

Smile fading, Chris watched Jensen pack another shirt into the duffel. "You're kidding me," he finally said. "You're going back to live in your parent's house?"

"That's the deal."

"Deal?" he repeated. "What _deal_?" He reached out to Jensen as the young man moved to stuff another shirt in the bag. He grabbed hold of Jensen's arms, forcing him to turn towards him. "Jen, look at me. Come on, man, look at me."

After a moment, Jensen finally met his best friend's eyes. His expression was sad, beaten.

Chris studied him for a few minutes and then shook his head. "He won, didn't he?" he asked. "Your dad won."

"Chris..." He tried to pull out of his friend's grasp, but Chris held him fast. Jensen sighed and averted his gaze. "I need to get out of here."

"You need to get out of here because Alan _told_ you to?" he asked. "Or, you need to get out of here for another reason?"

Annoyed, Jensen yanked his arms out of Chris' hold this time. He went back to his packing, needing something to do to keep his mind off of everything. "What the fuck does it matter?" he asked angrily. "Everything's just _wrong_ now."

Chris shook his head, taking a step closer to him. "What are you talking about?" He gritted his teeth in frustration when Jensen tried to push past him to stuff more clothes in the bag. He set both his hands to Jensen's chest and pushed him backwards. "Will you fucking _talk_ to me?"

The shove might have been just what Jensen was looking for. Instantly, he pushed back, getting right in Chris's face and snarling at him. "What do you want from me?" he nearly screamed. "What do you want, Chris?"

Chris just stared at him, knowing the outburst was needed.

"You want me to tell you that I'm scared shitless?" Jensen continued, his voice booming and echoing off the garage walls. "You want me to admit that I'm running away with my tail between my legs? Because I am, alright? Jensen the Coward is right back to _square-fucking-one_."

He was furious, but he was furious at _himself_. Chris let him yell, let him say words that he didn't necessarily agree with. Jensen didn't want to hear what Chris's thoughts were. He was too wrapped up in what was going wrong with his life. After a moment, silence settled between them. Chris nodded his head as he stared back at his best friend. "You done?" he asked, his voice soft.

Jaw set angrily, Jensen looked away, trying not to roll his eyes. He set his hands upon his hips and took a few deep, calming breaths.

"Do you think he did it?"

That was the one question Jensen had been hoping Chris wouldn't ask. He closed his eyes and sighed softly.

"Is that the real reason you're going?"

The broken and battered appearance returned to Jensen. His shoulders fell and he slumped down onto the sofa. He set his head in his hands and rested his elbows upon his knees. "I don't know," he answered. "I don't fucking know anything. I'm trying to figure everything out, but I can't get my head around any of it."

Chris sat down beside him, frowning.

"I feel like I'm going crazy," Jensen told him, still cradling his head. "I just want to get out of here."

Chris reached up and set his hand to the back of Jensen's neck. He let it rest there for a moment and then pulled the young man closer, wrapping his arms around him. He set his chin against the top of Jensen's head and just held him for a while.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Everything he now owned in a stack in his arms. He stared down at the clothes, topped with a roll of toilet paper. He'd been here before, of course, but this time it was wrong.

"I'm not supposed to be here," he'd told one of the correctional officers.

"Sure, kid," he'd returned.

"No, I mean it," he told him. "I didn't _do_ it."

The correctional officer looked at him, exasperated. "Kid," he said. "Do you got any idea how many guys come through those gates that swear they’re innocent?" He shook his head, frowning. "I don't give a shit. You do what you're told, when you're told, don't make any waves, and we'll get along fine."

Alan was working on his case, but until his trial date arrived, Jared was to be put into gen pop. General Population. He'd been there before. He wasn't looking forward to going back.

Clenching his jaw, Jared walked as the correctional officer guided him. Both men that walked with him, clad in black uniforms, were shorter than he was. He could have taken them in a heartbeat, he was sure. But when he'd put on the orange jumpsuit, something inside him died. He was right back to where he'd started again.

The short sleeves showed off the ink that ran up and down his arms. As he walked past the rows and rows of inmates, they quickly glanced over the tattoos, searching for allegiance, searching for something they recognized. One of his tattoos, a black figure on his back, was one an inmate had done for him. He'd thought about having it covered, but he left it there as a reminder of darker times that were behind him. And when he'd met Jensen, all memories of the tattoo had faded. Now, however, they returned.

The inmates called out to him, spoke in the violent, obscene language Jared remembered from so many years ago. He looked straight ahead, not meeting anyone's eyes, for that could easily get him killed. He went with the correctional officers, compliant.

"Open on twenty-five!" the CO on his left called.

The barred door rattled open. The inmate already there jumped down to the floor from the top bunk and stared at his new cellmate. Jared did not look back.  
  
"Horton," the CO said. "You got a temporary guest."

"Temporary, my ass," the second officer chuckled. "He ain't gettin' out of here."

"Close on twenty-five!"

Jared listened to the cell door slam closed, his back to the correctional officers. They laughed as they walked away, keys to unknown doors and locks jangling in their pockets. For a long time, Jared didn't move. He held his prison regulation belongings in his hands, staring straight ahead until Horton moved himself into Jared's field of vision.

"You ain't no head-case, are you?"

Almost glaring, Jared met the man's eyes. He was scrawny. Jared wondered how he'd survived in this place. He stepped closer to the bottom bunk and set his things down atop the cheap, thin mattress.

"Hey, fish," Horton snarled. "I'm talkin' to you."

Jared felt the man's hands on him, shoving him. Instinct, from when he'd been in the place before, took over, and he threw himself at Horton. He shoved him up against the wall, jaw clenched, and glared down into the scrawny man's eyes.

"You fucking touch me again," he began, his voice nothing but a gruff growl.

Uncomfortably, Horton waited to hear the rest of the threat. Jared's arm was pressing against his throat, making it difficult, but not impossible to breathe. "What?" he encouraged with a less-than-sane smile. "You'll kill me?"

Jared couldn't say those words. They were the reason he was there, and he was tired. Tired of everything. He glared at Horton for only a second more and then let go of him, giving him one last shove up against the cement cell wall. "Leave me the fuck alone," he spat.

Turning away, Jared stretched out on the bottom bunk. He thought of Jensen, how much he already missed him, and hoped that the kid would find his way out of the mess Jared had gotten him into. He closed his eyes and sighed, one last thought slipping through his mind before he let the old jail-bird Jared return.

_Good-bye, Jen._


	45. Chapter forty-three

Chris dropped Jensen off at home around mid-evening on Monday night. His father’s car wasn’t in the driveway, which he took as a blessing, and when he got inside, the house was still and quiet. He waved goodbye to Chris and shut the door behind him, wondering where everyone was. It was clear his sister was elsewhere, since usually she played music or games or the TV in the evening and he could hear none of those things.

There was movement only a few moments later. A door opening down the hall and he saw his mother step out and look down the corridor at him. Donna looked surprised to see him, which he wasn’t expecting. He’d thought Alan might have warned her, but apparently not. She looked at his bags and then at his face and asked him what was going on. She sounded as upset and confused as he felt at that moment.

“I don’t know, mom,” he answered, honestly. “Jay’s in trouble and he doesn’t want me to help him. I didn’t have a choice.”

She moved as though she was going to hug him, and he took a quick step back to avoid it. He didn’t want any more pity; he was done with it. He just wanted to lock himself in his room and try and work out how the hell this could have happened. At the hurt look on her face, though, he apologised.

“I just can’t deal with this right now. I’m sorry.”

She nodded and let him go, watching him heft the bags he had upstairs.

He stayed in his room all night, not feeling any kind of appetite, and went through every ‘what if?’ that he could think of. What if he’d stayed home and let Chris visit Steve alone? What if Jared had just come with them? What if Jared really _had_ killed Chuck? The not knowing was going to just keep hurting, he knew. He hadn’t been able to get Jared to talk. His father wouldn’t let him be in the room alone with him and he knew that was all he needed. He wanted to have Jared look him in the eyes and tell him he didn’t do it. Jensen was certain that he hadn’t, but the threat in the parking lot, the violent reaction to the way Chuck had treated him – none of it was exactly innocent. The fact that there was still that tiny, niggling doubt about all of this made Jensen hurt inside even more. He didn’t want to think that about Jared, but a part of his mind couldn’t help itself, it seemed.

What if Chuck had done something else? Something unthinkable, that might drive Jared to such an action? Jensen just didn’t know, couldn’t find out, and it was frustrating as hell.

 

 

 

 

 

At 1am, Stevie woke with a start on the couch. Jeff wasn’t next to her like he had been a couple of hours ago, when she’d fallen asleep watching Beyond Belief with him. She twisted around and saw him leaning against the doorway of the garage, his back to her. He looked round only when he heard her get up and move through the kitchen to get to him.

“Hey, baby,” he said, smiling as she slipped an arm round his waist. It was a sad smile, though, like he’d been caught grieving.

“He’ll be back before you know it,” Stevie said, her voice soft against his shirt-sleeve. “They both will.”

“Wish I could believe that,” Jeff sighed, moving his hand to cover hers. “Maybe Jay’s right, though, at least about one thing. Maybe Jensen _is_ better off with his parents. They have a nice house, plenty of money-“

“Money isn’t everything and I’m sure that Jensen knows that. That won’t be the reason that he’s gone back.”

“No, I know it ain’t. I know why he left and it wasn’t anything Alan said to him. The boy’s scared. Who can blame him? I’m surprised you’re still here sometimes. After all you’ve had to go through with us.”

Stevie shrugged. “I wouldn’t have had it any other way,” she told him. “I love my boys.”

“Hey, your boys love you too.” Jeff shifted then, awkwardly leaning on the wall for support, and Stevie moved around him so she could hold his face in her hands and kiss him, slow and sweet.

“I know.”

“I’m worried for him,” Jeff admitted.

“I know,” Stevie said again. “So am I.”

“I mean, he’s been in trouble before. But not like this. It’s like he’s given up. Like he’s just going to let it happen. And I can’t figure out why.”

“Makes you wonder what Alan said to him before anyone else got in there, doesn’t it?”

Jeff grunted in agreement, annoyed by that thought. He felt a sudden urge to go straight to the Ackles house and make the man tell him what was said. If he didn’t know that anything like that would only make Jared’s situation worse, he would have done it in a heartbeat.

“This is wrong,” he muttered, resting his head back against the wall. “Everything about this is wrong.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There was a knock at his door the following morning, probably to wake him up for school. He was already awake, _still_ awake, since he’d been unable to sleep. He’d heard his sister get back around ten and wondered when his mother had let her start staying out so late on a school night. He wondered what his mother told her to explain Jensen being at home again. He’d heard his father return at eleven, followed by a few minutes of raised voices and then a door slamming.

The knocking at his door grew more insistent then. He ignored it and the door rattled before his mother’s voice called his name. He sighed, got up from the floor, and crossed the room to unlock the door.

“Honey-“

“I’m not going to school today,” he interrupted, his voice scratchy from the insomnia.

She didn’t even flinch. Just told him she’d call the school and let them know. She started to tell him that his father was heading out soon, but he turned away before she could finish.

“I don’t want that asshole anywhere near me,” he said, feeling an angry heat prickle his skin at the very thought.

“This isn’t his fault, Jensen.”

“Don’t give me that, mom. It’s _all_ his fault. Every damn thing.”

His mother didn’t bother arguing with him. She stepped into his room after him, though, and he closed his eyes for a moment, annoyed. He just wanted everyone to leave him be. Why was that so damned hard for them all to understand?

“Did your father tell you anything about what’s going on?”

Jensen hadn’t been expecting that question. He turned again, his eyes narrowed. “Why?”

“I don’t think you understand it very well, that’s all. And I’m not saying for a moment that I think Jared is capable of killing a man, but I guess you can never know what someone can do if they feel they have to. Your father says they found clothes with Chuck’s blood on them in Jared’s room. _Your_ room.”

“Yeah,” Jensen agreed. “In the laundry, where Jay probably put them after the fight with Chuck the other night. Because Jay doesn’t _do_ laundry, not really, so he just dumped them right in there with everything else.”

“He can’t prove that, though, can he?” She sounded sad when she asked, which was only a slight relief.

“No, Mom. I guess he can’t.”

“And they found a gun in the garage.”

Jensen nodded. “A Glock. Jeff’s gun. He has a license for it.”

His mother stared at him. “You _knew?_ ”

“I’ve held the damned thing, Mom. You think Dad doesn’t own a gun or two? Maybe he just never told you about them, huh?”

“You know your father’s feelings on guns.”

Scowling, Jensen got onto his bed and sat down cross-legged on the mattress. “He doesn’t have to live in the kind of neighbourhood that Jeff and Jay do. I’m glad he feels safe enough to pretend to take the moral high ground, but that’s not gonna help anyone now, is it?”

“Do you hate your father?”

“I don’t love him,” Jensen answered, feeling that was the truth. “Mom, I’m sorry. I love you and I love Kenzie and Josh, but Dad? No. Maybe once, but never again.”

She nodded, sadly, and Jensen was hit with the distinct feeling that she felt exactly the same way about her husband. He said nothing about it, though, and she said she’d make him some lunch later on and it was up to him if he wanted to come down for it or not. He waited until she was gone and then locked the door again after her. He didn’t want to be disturbed by anyone else.

Fully dressed, he got under the covers of his bed and grabbed his laptop from the nightstand, switching it on. He couldn’t help himself. He’d stayed away from the bed all night, pulling cushions from his closet so he could get comfortable on the floor, because there were too many memories attached to the plain white sheets and too-soft mattress. This was where Jay had taken his virginity from him. This was where he’d realised just _how much_ he loved the man. This was where, with slippery wet skin and a desperation for the other man’s body that he never seemed able to satisfy, he had decided that he was going to spend the rest of his life with him. He hadn’t told Jay that at the time. But he thought that maybe Jay knew anyway.

There was a folder on the desktop of his computer that was just labelled ‘J-and-J’. He clicked it open, half a laugh escaping him when he was reminded how many videos Jay had made of the pair of them. Stupid videos, innocent and playful, and some not so innocent too. He opened up a video that had been made on New Year’s Eve. His mother, Dani and Stevie filled the screen, pulling faces at the camera, and he quickly skipped forward. He saw himself and stopped, his heart rate building pace. Jay had trained the camera on the bed when they had gone up there as the party wound down and now there he was, naked, bent over Jensen as he kissed his stomach. Jensen watched his hands moving over bare skin, wrapping around his thighs when he started to blow him. He didn’t remember the feel of Jay’s hands there. Didn’t remember being manhandled like that, pulled up towards Jay’s mouth. He remembered the blow-job, though it was a vague, soft-focus kind of memory.

Jensen moved the computer to the side of him so that he could reach under the covers and unfasten his jeans without toppling it. He shifted his hips upward, pulling his jeans and briefs down over his thighs. Gasping as the material brushed over the head of his dick. He kept his eyes on the laptop screen, Jay’s tan, tattooed skin filling the display. _Fuck_ , Jensen thought. _He is so beautiful._ It occurred to him that he hadn’t really ever said that. Jay had told Jensen constantly that he was gorgeous and he’d even stopped arguing with him over that recently.

Jay would watch these videos most evenings before Jensen returned from school. Getting himself all wound up. Getting himself off so that all Jensen could smell if he decided to sit in the garage to do his homework was the scent of motor oil and spunk. He had told Jensen about it one morning, while he was getting ready to go to school and Jay had actually _woken up_ before he left. The morning classes that day had been pretty uncomfortable as he fought to dispel the mental images of Jay doing exactly what he was doing right now.

He let his thumb catch on the underside of his dick. He rubbed the thick vein there and his breath hitched at a flash of memory. Jay’s finger right there, pushing in, making Jensen shake with an orgasm he couldn’t control. He came, dry, and then Jay had lifted his legs up and Jensen’s thighs had rested on Jay’s shoulders as the other man fucked him with his tongue until he came again, weakly. He hadn’t been able to move for a full fifteen minutes after that. A fact that Jay had taken full advantage of by mercilessly massaging his chest, teasing his freshly pierced nipple with nipping kisses.

The memory alone made him come right then and he held his breath as it spattered over the bottom of his shirt. He calmed down, his eyes drawn back to the screen. Jared had switched the camera off at some point, or edited into something else, because now the footage playing was of Jensen, dressed in a football jersey and blue jeans, flipping Jay off as he repeatedly told him to do something interesting. He remembered that day, too.

Feeling pathetic, and with his come drying on his shirt and belly, he shut the video down and pushed his laptop down the bed to sit by his feet. It wasn’t the sex he missed, he told himself. It was just Jared.

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen went back to school on Wednesday, done with wallowing. He’d showered and had lunch with his mother the previous day, then spent the afternoon helping her out. An apology of sorts. He’d disappeared back into his room the moment his father returned home, though, and not come out until the next morning, after he had left for work. He wondered if Alan had seen Jared again. He wondered how Jared was coping.

He didn’t want to be back at school, but it was better than sitting at home and thinking too much. At least here he had one person to talk to about it. Somebody that understood him better than his own parents did now.

He’d forgotten about the people who didn’t.

Jensen and Chris were sat with their lunch at the far end of the cafeteria. _Nerd Niche_ , they used to call it. Jensen wasn’t a nerd any more, though, and Chris never had been. More people spoke to Jensen now, but they still seemed reluctant to socialise too much with him. Maybe he just gave out a ‘fuck off’ vibe, he didn’t know. They were halfway through lunch when Doug sauntered over and plonked his tray on the table right beside Jensen’s. He sat down next to him, ignoring Chris telling him to get lost.

“Hey, princess,” he drawled. “Saw your boyfriend’s name in the papers. What’s it like, taking it up the ass from a murderer?”

Figured. He was only brave enough to approach Jensen because he knew that Jared was incarcerated. Jensen responded far quicker than he once would have to the taunt, though. Before Doug could react, Jensen had got a firm hold on the back of his neck and was pushing his face down into the plate of food on his tray. He lifted him up again, hearing people start talking all at once and hearing teachers come running across the hall. Before he was separated from Doug he managed to get in close enough to growl out a warning.

“Ask that again, shithead, and next time your face is gonna break that table.”

Chris was staring at him as he was pulled up from his seat and pushed towards the exit, Doug still sputtering and wiping food off his face.

 

 

 

 

 

While he was sat outside the principal’s office, Stevie came in. She looked pissed off and he couldn’t blame her. He _felt_ pissed off, because this whole deal was completely unfair. She went straight past him and into the office, with only a glance his way, and he straightened, frowning when the door shut firmly behind her.

Five minutes later she was coming out again and told him to follow her. He did as he was instructed, the frown deepening when she led him out to the parking lot. He got in the passenger seat of her hire car when she told him to and she got in the driver’s seat, opening up the window a crack for some cool, fresh air.

“I’m not going to ask if you’re okay, since that seems a little redundant.”

“Yeah. A little,” Jensen agreed, still confused.

“I spoke to the principal. Told him that you have a lot on your plate right now. He agreed to let me speak to you about it. You can’t go around doing what you just did, Jensen.”

He snorted. “Why not? People like Doug deserve it.”

“You really want to ruin what has so far been a great school career by turning into an asshole for the last few months?”

Turning in his seat to face her, anger sparked in Jensen’s eyes. “I’m just fed up of taking crap from that guy, okay? Jay taught me to stand up for myself. That’s all I was doing.”

“You don’t have to resort to violence,” Stevie reminded him. “There are plenty of other ways.”

“Is that what this is about? Don’t worry about me, okay? And tell Jeff not to worry either. I’m not going to turn out like Jared.”

“Nobody ever expected you to, Jensen. But you keep doing shit like this, you aren’t going to turn out any better, either. I know you’re scared and probably feeling let down by everyone right now, but promise me you’re not going to let those feelings make you throw your future away.”

“What fucking future?” Jensen asked, his voice loud in the stillness of the car’s interior. “How the hell can I promise anything now? Everything’s screwed up and it isn’t _fair_. You think my dad’s really going to help Jared out of anything? I mean, what the hell was Jared thinking? Does he hate me so much that he just jumped at the chance to get me out of his life? Did I scare him that much by telling him I loved him? Has this all been some giant fucking joke on me?”

Stevie looked out over the rest of the campus, feeling her heart grow heavy at Jensen’s words. “He loves you,” she said. “I don’t think that was any kind of joke.”

“He never said it.”

“He didn’t need to! Everything he did, Jensen. Everything he did… It was obvious.”

“Then he should have tried harder to stop this shit from happening.”

“Why? For you?” Stevie looked across at him and he shifted, uncomfortably. “You really think he had that much of a choice?”

Jensen _knew_ he hadn’t had the choice. And Stevie could see that right away, in the way he lowered his eyes from hers.

“Exactly. So just stop this. Ignore Doug, get on with your schoolwork and stay out of trouble. You know Jay didn’t do it and the law will figure that out sooner or later. Until then you just have to keep your nose clean.”

“Is that an order, Miss?” Jensen asked, a slight smile on his lips.

“Oh, yeah. This baby doesn’t want an asshole for a big brother.”

“Baby?”

“What?” Stevie said, looking back out of the window.

“You said baby.”

There was a short silence, and then she sighed. “Yeah, I know. Jeff doesn’t even know yet.”

“Don’t you think you should tell him?”

“He has enough to worry about right now. Don’t think you’re the only one that’s angry and upset about this. He’s been there every step of the way since Jared was nine years old. He’s been there every time Jared’s been in trouble. I think this time has really scared him, though. I can’t make it even worse by telling him that he’s going to be a father.”

Jensen shook his head. “How does that make it worse?”

“It just… It just does, okay? So don’t tell him, all right?”

“I won’t. Does the school know?”

“Right now the only people that know are me and you. I want to keep it that way. For now.”

Nodding, Jensen reached across the front seat and Stevie let him hug her in congratulations.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jared could feel it. Eyes on him while he took a shower. He hated these open showers for that reason only. He didn’t care about being naked in front of a bunch of other men; didn’t give a shit about that. Didn’t even care if one or two of them wanted to leer at him while he showered. Up to them, the frigging perverts. So long as they didn’t try anything. What bothered him was when people were looking for more than just the size of his dick or the tightness of his ass. And he knew the goddamn tattoo that meant so little outside of prison was on full display when he showered.

The black crow that was on his lower back, on the left hand side, had been one of the tattoos that Jensen asked about once. Just once. Jared told him to ignore it, Jensen had touched it, playful until he felt Jared’s muscles go completely stiff. Teasing until he heard the tone of Jared’s voice when he told him, again, to _ignore it_. The crow tattoo was the only physical reminder, bar the short scar on the side of his calf, of Jared’s time with Chuck and his gang. It was a reminder to _him_ that he was his own man from now on. That he didn’t do anyone else’s work unless it was honest and he was paid for it.

To anyone else, it would be a reminder that he had betrayed the people that said they were taking care of him.

He was quick to finish, not meeting anyone’s eyes as he grabbed his towel and headed away from the fine mist of water to dry off.

Inmates were allowed fifteen minutes in the prison gym each morning and another fifteen at night. Jared headed there as soon as he was told that he could, needing to exercise away some of the nervous anger that was building inside him. He’d been in here for only two days and the fury at what had been done to him was still strong. He’d get rid of that, he knew. He’d accept this bullshit within a week and, maybe, a month down the line he might even be out of here. Move his stuff out of Jeff’s place and take the bike up the old Route 66. Hustle and charm his way across the country until there was no more road to drive. The plan made a small part of him feel hope and he tucked it away inside fast, knowing that there was no fucking point.

He was thinking so hard on why not that he didn’t see the attack coming before he was pushed into the wall, skull bouncing painfully on the painted brick. His attacker quickly stepped away, his hands held up.

“Shit, man. Look where you’re damn well going.”

“What the fuck is your problem?” Jared demanded, straightening up with a quick shake of his head to clear it.

“Ain’t got a problem, dick. You do though. You come waltzing in here with a fucking crow on your skin like it belongs there? You don’t deserve no fucking bird, JT.”

Jared’s eyes widened for just a second, then he was back to anger.

“And what the fuck right do you have to decide that?” He asked.

The other man just lifted his shirt, and Jared’s eyes were drawn straight down to the large crow tattooed in solid black over his abdomen. “That’s what fucking right I got,” the man snarled, dropping his shirt again. “I was on Chuck’s crew when you were still in diapers, long before you fucked him over. And I heard all about it when you did.”

“And here I never did get that thank you card.”

“Oh, you’ll get your thank you, you little asshole. We got you in just the right place for that now.”

Jared stared back at him, but said nothing. Though in his mind was one very clear thought. _We?_


	46. Chapter forty-four

It was the first hit that really brought Jared back to his old self. He remembered having to fight for such menial things, even for the honor to have that crow tattoo. He'd done a lot of things to get it. A lot of _bad_ things that he never told Jeffrey _or_ Jensen about.

It was the first hit that really cleared his mind. Jared let it happen, let his head snap back, let the blood flow down his mouth and chin, from his nose. He reached up and set a hand to the blood, then spied down at his fingers. He smiled and looked back over at the inmate. The man was shorter than him, but that didn't mean he would be easier to beat. Jared didn't recognize him, so the guy must've been doing time while Jared was in Chuck's crew. Brothers don't turn against brothers, so it was normal to have a few guys absent in the crew -- someone covering for his brothers, or someone not willing to incriminate the clan, which is what they thought Jared had done.

A crowd was gathering by the time Jared had wiped his nose clean on the hem of his standard-issue white T-shirt. The orange jumpsuit was tied around his waist, more an annoyance than anything else. Sniffling through his nose, Jared looked over at the enraged inmate. "What's your name, man?" he asked.

He sneered, showing his crooked, yellowed teeth. "I'm Venom."

It took everything Jared had not to laugh in the guy's face. He dabbed at his nose again, his shirt pulled up so that he could use the hem of it, and smiled a little brighter. "Well, Venom," he said. "I got news for you."

"You think _words_ are gonna make a difference, fish?" he snarled.

Jared let go of his shirt and shrugged. "Might," he offered. "See, I didn't rat out Chuck and the crew." He shrugged again, his arms open wide. "It came from somebody else. Probably the same asshole that killed him. _And_ ," he said, before Venom could interrupt him. "Your name.." He paused to shake his head, and give the inmate a sympathetic look. "...Is ri _dic_ ulous."

That was all it took. Venom had had enough disrespect for one day. He lunged at Jared, his fist connecting with Jared's nose again, causing a fresh flow of blood. They tumbled backwards and the crowd around them tightened, the men cheering their favorite on. Regardless of the man's bulk, Jared was strong enough to flip Venom over his head. He felt Venom's hands try to grip at the chest of Jared's shirt for leverage. Jared was thankful that he wasn't allowed to have the nipple rings in prison, because that move would have nearly crippled him and given Venom the upper hand.

Venom landed on the floor _hard_. While the man was momentarily dazed, Jared jumped up and stood over him, one of his feet at either side of Venom's body. He took hold of Venom's orange collar and pulled his fist back. He let it fly once, twice, three times -- and just kept punching. He felt the splatter of the man's hot blood upon his face, but didn't let it stop him from landing another blow. He heard some of the encouraging shouts turn to ones of mercy, telling him to give it up.

He didn't, though. Not until he felt hands upon him, pulling him away from Venom. He thought, at first, that it was some of the other inmates. He fought against the hands, and spun around to take down whoever was stopping the fight.

He came face to face with one of the COs. The officer pointed a finger in Jared's face, his jaw clenched, and snarled at him. "You hit me, boy, and you'll get more than the Shu," he warned.

Two other correctional officers restrained Jared, and the sneering CO led the way to solitary confinement. Jared had been there before, and while he hated it, it would also bring a welcome retreat right now. Still high on adrenaline, Jared fought against the officers. He was dragged through the corridors, but couldn't make heads or tails over where he was being led. Was it the west end? The south end? He couldn't tell. Roughly he was shoved into a tiny, dimly lit room. The door squeaked loudly when it was shut. Jared slammed his fist against the metal door, making a loud _thud_ that echoed through the room and hallways.

"Let me out of here!" he shouted.

The CO peered through the small window at the top of the door. "Two days, Padalecki."

"Two _days_?" he repeated. "That fucker started it, and you know it."

"Two days," he said again. "And if he's hurt bad, you're in deep shit."

The lights were turned off in the room -- something Jared knew was against regulations. The COs didn't care though. Frustrated, Jared raked his fingers through his hair, pulling hard. "Fuck!" he screamed. His voice bounced off the walls, almost like it did in the garage at home.

Resting his back against the wall, Jared slid down to the floor, curling up as much as he could. He set his head in his hands and wished, once again, that this would all be over. He wanted to go home.

 

 

 

 

 

Chris didn't know what he'd expected when he arrived to the Ackles household, but he certainly hadn't expected this. In all of their years as best friends, he had never been locked out of Jensen's room. Ever. Kenzie was there, pounding upon Jensen's door, calling out to her brother.

"Let me in, you loser!" she called.

"Go _away_ , Mackenzie," came Jensen's voice from inside the room. "Leave me alone."

"You can't stay in there forever, you know!" she reminded him.

"Watch me!"

"What if you see me in _school_?" she yelled to him. "Huh? What _then_?"

"Then I'll run away like everyone else does."

Chris smiled at the taunt and stepped closer to Jensen's doorway, listening to Kenzie complain at her brother's words. "Hey, kiddo," he said gently. "Let me give it a try."

Kenzie scoffed and rolled her eyes toward the ceiling. "Good luck," she returned, crossing her arms over her chest. "He's mean now."

"He's got a lot going on," Chris reminded her. She only shook her head at him and walked away, frumping as though she'd just been refused the fuzziest puppy in the world. She grumbled as she went, but Chris knew she would forgive Jensen in a heartbeat if he asked.

Knocking on the door, Chris stood tall, jamming his free hand into his jeans pocket.

"Go _away_ , Kenzie," Jensen snarled. "What part of that don't you get?"

"Maybe it's because you're using more than one syllable," Chris returned, a slight smile upon his lips.

It was quiet for a second, as if Jensen was trying to figure out what was going on. "Chris?"

"Yeah, open the door."

"No, go away."

"Dude, you've never shut me out before," he said. "Get your ass over here and unlock the door or I'll break it down. And you _know_ I will, Jensen."

Chris thought he heard a heavy sigh, and could almost see Jensen slumping towards the door. A few moments later, the door was unlocked, and swung open.

Jensen looked at Chris, who was now leaning against the doorjamb. "Don't look so fucking pleased with yourself," he said, unsmiling. He stepped back, letting Chris inside, and then closed the door again, re-locking it.

Chris did a quick once-over to Jensen's attire -- or lack of it. The only thing he wore was a pair of black pajama pants with small Harley Davidson logos scattered upon them. The drawstring was tied in a bow, and Jensen's bare feet poked out from the wide legs. His tattoos were on full display, but Chris had gotten used to them, and he thought that, if he saw Jensen without them, it wouldn't be _his_ Jensen at all.

"Hey, man, what's going on?" Chris asked, following Jensen further into the room.

"Oh, other than the world's end?" he asked, opening his arms for a moment. "Nothing, why?"

"A little dramatic, aren't you?" He received no verbal answer. Instead, Jensen just looked at him, his hazel-green eyes much harsher than they used to be. "Alright, I admit that things are rough right now. But _you_ decided to move home."

"No," Jensen said, sitting down on the edge of his bed. "Jared and _Alan_ decided that. I wasn't given a choice in the matter." He looked around the room, peering at it, as if _he_ was in a cell, rather than Jared. "So, now I'm stuck here until I can graduate and get the fuck out."

Pursing his lips together, Chris walked over to the bed and sat down beside Jensen. It was quiet for a few seconds, Jensen staring down at a book that was in his hands. Chris hadn't realized he'd been holding it until just then. Leaning close, Chris nudged Jensen's shoulder with his own. "Let's go get drunk," he said.

Jensen seemed to think about it for a moment. "Ah," he finally grumbled, shrugging one shoulder.

"Come on," Chris encouraged. "It's Friday night. Let's go have some fun."

Quiet for a few seconds more, Jensen finally shook his head. "I don't know," he said. "I really don't feel up to it."

"Alright, so we'll stay here," he shrugged. "I'll order pizza via Donna's kitchen, and we'll watch some old-as-shit gangster movie on DVD. It'll be just like when we were younger."

This time, Jensen smiled and looked over at his best friend. "It's eleven o'clock at night," he said. "Mom's not going to make you a pizza."

"Miniscule detail," Chris grinned. "I miss you. I want to spend some time with my best friend."

Jensen looked away from him. He glanced up at the ceiling and took a deep breath, sighing softly. "Alright," he gave in. "Second drawer has some pajamas. And _I_ get to pick out the movie."

"You picked out the last one."

"Dude," Jensen returned seriously. "That was _seven_ years ago."

"Still makes it my turn, asshole."

"Fine, fine. But it's gotta be Cagney."

 

 

 

 

 

Twenty minutes later, Chris was in relatively the same attire as Jensen, wearing only pajama pants, these ones with red chili peppers decorating the black fabric. The movie was James Cagney's _Angels With Dirty Faces_ , playing on the flat-screen television Jensen had gotten for his last birthday. They weren't really paying attention to it, though. They were both stretched out on the double bed, feet propped up on the headboard, staring up at the ceiling. They talked about simple things, things of the past, how Jensen's being a sickly child held him back from one year of school, and how that move had been a blessing, because they'd found each other the following year. Chris kept him sane, and Jensen -- he still didn't know what he provided Chris with.

They got into more complicated topics, like high school term papers, graduation, college, and Dani. Jensen could tell, without even looking at Chris, that there was still some tension there.

"You love her though, right?"

Chris nodded. "More than I ever have anyone else," he said. "Present company excluded."

Jensen laughed, nudging Chris with his elbow. "Shut up," he mumbled. "I'm serious."

"Yeah," he said, serious again. "I do. And I really see myself staying with her for as long as she'll have me. It's just..."

Jensen turned his head to look at Chris as best he could in the close proximity. "Just what?"

Chris didn't look back at him. "Well, since New Year's," he explained. "Since Steve's..."

"Oh."

"Yeah," he frowned. "She and I -- we've talked about letting someone else in with us. But she's stuck on you and Jared. No offense, man, 'cause I love you, you know that. But, I just don't think I could with her there. What we did... That was just a one-time thing, y'know? But it was also something between just _us_. Dani, though, she wants you guys in on it."

"And it weirds you out."

Chris chuckled and nodded his head. "Is that awful of me?"

Smiling brighter, Jensen shook his head. "No," he answered. "I _do_ think that you should talk to someone."

Chris seemed almost offended as he finally turned and looked into Jensen's eyes. "Dude, I'm not talking to a shrink about this shit."

Jensen tried not to laugh too loud. "I don't mean a _shrink_ , nimrod," he returned. "I mean, you should talk to Trevor. He'll know someone that's trustworthy for that kind of thing."

"Really?"

Jensen nodded. "Jay trusts him," he said.

Chris returned the nod. "Good enough for me."

Interrupting them, there was a soft knock at the door. Jensen knew it wasn't Kenzie, just by the gentleness used. And he knew it wasn't Alan, because there was no biting bark of his name after the knock. Josh was out with Cathy, gone to see an old _Indiana Jones_ rerun at the drive-in. That left Mom.

"Jensen?"

"Yeah, Mom?"

"Honey, I made you and Chris a snack."

Jensen looked at Chris for a moment, his brow furrowed. He smiled as they both sat up, Jensen hopping off the bed and heading towards the door. Chris followed him a moment later, peeking his head out the door when Jensen opened it. Donna was there with a big tray, full of goodies.

"I wasn't sure what you liked, so I put a few of everything on."

The comment was directed mostly towards Chris, but it was true enough that she didn't know Jensen as completely as a mother should. She smiled at them and handed over the tray. Her eyes quickly scanned over both boys' bare chests and a moment of panic squeezed at her heart. "You two aren't..."

Jensen looked at Chris and then rolled his eyes. "No, Mom," he said. "Thanks for the food." He closed the door again and locked it. Alan should be home any minute, and Jensen didn't want to give the man an opportunity to just waltz into his room.

"What do you mean, _no_?" Chris teased. "You say that like it could never happen."

"Shut up, you freak."

Chris set the tray down on Jensen's desk. "Dude," he said happily. "Your Mom made you cocoa and sandwiches."

Jensen chuckled. "Yeah," he returned. "Trying to make up for lost time, I think."

 

 

 

 

The mattress had to have been made in Hell. Jared had decided that just after an hour of sitting on it. Sleep didn't come to him, at least not for very long, while in the Shu. He mainly dozed, uneasy and furious. He wanted to get out, and he probably could have, if he'd been willing to rat Venom out. Even though the guy attacked him, he refused to crack.

"Come on, son," the CO had encouraged just hours after his solitary time had started. "If you give us the details, we can get you out of here, make sure you're safe."  
  
"Fuck off," Jared had said through the steel door. "I ain't no rat."

It was almost the end of the two days though. He'd made it with nothing more than the silence ricocheting off the walls, and the voices mumbling in his head. It wasn't time, but he still heard the keys in the door.

He squinted against the light that poured in from the corridor, slanting across the floor and walls. He raised his hand for a moment, shielding his eyes against the sudden brightness.

"You're lucky, Padalecki."

He recognized the CO's voice before he really saw who it was. The same guy that had thrown him in there. "Why?" he asked. He didn't consider being released two hours early any sort of real luck.

"Because someone finally told us what really happened."

The guard stepped aside, revealing Horton standing there. The man looked nervous, as if every little sound was someone coming after him. Jared had thought for sure that his cellmate was going to be nothing but annoyance and trouble. Seemed the man had proved him wrong.

 

 

 

 

They didn't take Jared back to his cell. Instead, he had a short-and-not-sweet meeting with Alan, filled with positive-negative statements. _All is going well. The evidence they have seems irrefutible, but we're not giving up without a fight now, are we?_

Jared hated the man. He hated the sound of his voice, the stench of his fucking cologne. He found himself grinding his teeth while the lawyer talked. By the time he was back in his cell, his jaw ached.

Horton was there when he returned, laying on the top bunk. He sat up when Jared walked into the cell. They looked at each other for a few minutes, nothing but silence between them. Horton jumped down from his bunk and scratched at his blonde hair.

"I'm gonna be late for PI," he said. "Boss don't like it when I'm late."

Before Horton could leave for his prison job, Jared reached out to him, taking hold of the man's arm. "Hey, Horton," he said. He paused for a moment, trying to smile. "Thanks."

Horton returned the half-hearted grin, nodding. He turned to go again, but Jared halted him once more.

"Can I ask why?"

Horton looked up at Jared again, silent for what seemed like a long time. Finally, he shook his head. "Paybacks are a bitch, right?"

Jared eyed him. "Venom hurt you?"

"Not just me," he said. "There's plenty of others."

"I'm sorry, man."

Horton laughed, but there wasn't an ounce of humor in the chuckle. "Do me a favor, man?"

Jared shrugged. "What?"

Horton picked up a bible that sat upon his top bunk. He fipped some of the pages and picked up an envelope, sealed and addressed. "Somethin' happens to me," he said. "Mail this? It's to my girl."

Jared looked down at the letter, at Horton's chicken scratches.

Chuckling, Horton pointed at the envelope. "Don't go readin' it now. It's private. Tells her all the things I should have said when I was alive."

Jensen. Jared was reminded of all the things he should have said to him, too. Sighing, he shook his head and handed it back to Horton. "No way," he said. "You can tell her all of that when you get out."

"I might not _get_ out."

"Hold on, man," he said. "There'll be a new Pres and VP in Chuck's crew. And if they're who I think they're gonna be, you don't have to worry. You'll be okay."

Horton smiled, much sadder than before. He looked down at the letter, and then back up at Jared. "But they ain't in here, JT," he explained. "And there's a lot of other crows here." He nodded, looking into Jared's eyes. "Mail that for me."

 

 

 

 

 

"This is fucking insane."

"Shut up, already."

Chris sighed. "Well, it's freezing," he complained. "Tell me why we had to sneak out and come here? Leave a perfectly nice warm room and bed, to freeze our asses off?"

"Do _you_ want to talk to Alan? Explain where we were going?"

Chris frowned at Jensen. "Fuck, no."

"There you go then."

Jensen knocked at the door again, then jammed his hands into his coat pockets.

"It's too _late_ ," Chris said. "He's asleep, let's go."

"He is not, he just got back from closing up the bar, I'm almost sure of it."

Before Jensen could even finish his sentence, the door he'd been pounding on was whipped open. "What?"

A little scared, Jensen and Chris stared up at Rock. Out of the corner of his eye, Jensen saw Julius and Mace nearing them, in protect-mode. "H-hey," Jensen greeted. He cleared his throat and tried to speak without sounding like a terrified Boy Scout selling something no one wanted or needed. "Hi, I'm Jensen and this is Ch--"

"I know who you are," Rock interrupted. "What's up?"

Jensen cleared his throat again. "We were wondering if you could tell us anything about the night Chuck was killed."

Rock shook his head and leaned up against the doorjamb. "Can only tell you what I told the cops," he said. "Jay was at the bar until late. If he killed Chuck, he'd have to be able to run like the Flash, man."

Jensen chuckled and nodded. "That's a cool character," he mumbled, quickly straightening and becoming more serious when Chris gave him a reprimanding look. "Okay, but you _told_ the cops that Jared was with you?"

Rock nodded. "Yeah, man," he said. "I ain't got a clue why they don't listen."

"They said they have some of Jared's clothes with Chuck's blood on them."

"Told them about the fistfight they got into too," Rock continued. "I don't know what's going on, Jensen, but you best find out soon. I know his lawyer is your old man, but somethin' ain't right."

Jensen took his eyes from Rock and met Chris's gaze. No, something definitely wasn't right.


	47. Chapter forty-five

  
Author's notes: Three new chapters!  
___________________  


* * *

He really had to bite the bullet and speak to his father, but the thought of it made Jensen's skin crawl. He'd gotten away with barely seeing the man up to now, but Chris agreed with him that he needed to start asking questions and find out just what was happening with Jared. Jensen wanted to go to Mickey's while it was open, too, so that he could talk to some of the other bikers there. Not Chuck's crew, because he had a terrible feeling that they knew something he didn't. But some of the other people that Jared knew might be willing to give him some information. He chose to go to Mickey's first, but that decision was almost ruined the following night after school when his father demanded his presence at the dinner table.

He refused at first, telling his mom that he didn't want to sit and eat with the man, but she begged him, told him that Alan wanted to tell him something about Jared. That got his attention and he gave in to her, steeling himself with a few deep breaths at the bottom of the stairs before he went into the dining room. Kenzie and Josh were both present too, and both looked pissed off. Jensen took the empty place between his brother and sister, trying not to meet his father's eyes.

"For what we are about to receive, may the Lord make us thankful," his mother intoned, in her soft voice, and Jensen whispered an 'amen' in reply. He stared at his plate, not bothering to reach for any food, until his mother touched his arm across the table and asked him if he was going to eat.

"I really don't have much of an appetite," he told her, his gaze finally moving to his father's face. Alan was watching him, his mouth a thin, tight line. Jensen hadn't noticed just how old the man was looking lately. "You wanted to tell me something," he stated, wanting this over and done with so he could go back to his room and get ready to go over to Mickey's. Chris had said he would pick him up later to head over there.

"I wanted to remind you that you made the right choice," Alan told him. "That boy is nothing but trouble. He was in a fight in prison a few days ago."

Jensen's eyes widened. "A fight? Is he okay?"

"He's in a lot better shape than the other man that was involved."

Figured, Jensen thought. Jared could take care of himself, no doubt about it.

"The other man was a member of a gang known as the Crows. A gang that Jared himself was a member of. Did you know about this, Jensen?"

"You're honestly going to sit and talk to me about this over dinner?"

Alan slammed his palm down on the table and Kenzie jumped at the noise it made, while Jensen just kept his eyes fixed on his father's face, unflinching. "I will talk to you however and wherever I damn well please, son. And you will _realize_ that you are better off away from that family. Jared Padalecki was always trouble and he will only ever _be_ trouble. Sooner you can get that through your thick skull the better, boy."

Jensen stood from his seat, fuming, and his father got to his feet as well, staring him down. Daring him to say something. Jensen shook his head. It seemed like it didn't take very long for his father to forget just what kind of man Jensen had become now. "Yes," he said, his calm voice belying his need to throw a punch. "Jared _was_ trouble. _Yes._ He still _is_ trouble. And I don't give a shit about that, because I know he's not a murderer. _You_ know he's not a murderer. He's just a man who's had a tough life and who has to do what he needs to do to survive it. That's never included killing anybody and I'm not going to let you force him into starting!"

His mother had stood up now, while Kenzie was pressed back into her seat, her eyes wet with tears. Josh had his arm around her shoulders, his eyes narrowed at his father.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Is that what the plan is, Dad? Get him in prison with a bunch of Chuck's cronies, since you just _know_ they all want a piece of him? They hurt him so bad he has no choice but to kill to keep himself alive and then you don't even need to worry about the other case being such a pile of fucking _bullshit_!" He was shouting now, not even aware of his mother's hand on his arm.

"Were you there the night that Chuck died?" Alan asked. "That's right, you weren't. So don't pretend to know everything about your friend, Jensen. You know _nothing_."

Jensen took a deep breath, clenched his fists at his sides. "It's _you_ who's blind. You don't even know your own son any more, and I'm sorry Dad, but I'm not taking this crap now. I know Jared didn't do it."

"Then prove it. Just try and prove it."

Jensen wanted to tell him that that was _his_ job, but he didn't. Instead he left the table, in spite of Alan commanding him to get back there. He went into the hall and grabbed his keys, jacket and boots. His father came out into the hall and saw him pulling the boots onto his feet. Jensen was ready when Alan grabbed the top of his arm and pulled him up. He wrenched his arm free and pushed Alan across the corridor, until he hit the wall.

"Get the fuck off me," he snarled, and pulled his jacket over his shoulders. Alan didn't try and stop him again.

 

 

 

 

 

It was a good distance to Chris's house, but Jensen jogged over there, his anger urging him on. He knew where he needed to go, and it wasn't Mickey's. He got there and pounded on the door a couple of times, out of breath. Chris's mother answered, smiling when she saw him.

"Jensen. We haven't seen you here in a while, honey." She frowned. "Is everything okay?"

"No, nothing is okay. I need to see Chris. It's urgent."

Upset by his tone, Mrs Kane quickly turned and shouted her son's name. They heard a door open upstairs and then feet hammering down the stairs, and then Chris was there, looking as worried as his mother.

"Jen, what's up? What's happened?"

"Jared got into a fight in jail. I need to go see him."

"Right now?"

"Yes, right _now_."

Chris's mother had a hand to her mouth, shaking her head. "Will they let you do that? It's pretty late at night, I thought-"

"I don't _care_. I want to see him. I want to see that he's okay."

Chris stepped out onto the porch. "Mom's right, man. They're not gonna let you see him right now. No way."

Jensen slumped. They were both right. There was no way he'd get a visit with Jared at this time of evening. He probably had curfew or something soon. He'd probably be locked in his cell right now, waiting for the lights to go dim so he could pretend that he was getting some sleep. The thought of it made Jensen's heart ache.

"But we can go first thing in the morning."

"Chris-"

"Mom, it's okay. I'll call tomorrow and find out what time we can go visit. We can skip school for just one day, right?"

Jensen smiled and nodded. "Right."

"Do you still want to go over to Mickey's tonight?"

"Absolutely. I've got to find out what happened."

Chris turned back into the house to get his boots and jacket, along with the keys for his truck, and his mother told them both to be careful. It seemed that, like Jensen's own mother, she had long since despaired of controlling what her son did.

 

 

 

 

Mickey's was packed out, more so than it usually was at this time of night. There was a long row of bikes outside and only a few cars and trucks in amongst them. Chris parked up and they both hopped out, exchanging worried looks as they headed for the door. Jensen recognized the guy on the door as Satan and smiled nervously at him as they got closer.

"What do you two want?" Satan asked, his tone gruff but not unfriendly.

"Hoping to speak to a couple of people about Chuck's death. We're trying to find out what really happened to him."

"Tryin' to get JT out, huh?"

"Yessir," Jensen answered.

"I don't think you boys picked the best night. There's a lotta Chuck's crew in there right now. They're workin' out who's gonna be in charge."

"Right. Who's winning?"

Satan laughed. "Fuck knows. Ain't a competition, boy, just a lot of grown men bickerin' and throwin' punches. 'S'why it's best you stay out here."

"Do _you_ know anything?"

The man shrugged, the chains on his jacket making a heavy jingling noise as he did. "Heard they wanted Jay in the joint, but you can't do nothin' with rumors. I guess you already know that."

"You think one of Chuck's men set him up? Get rid of Chuck, let someone else take the fall, and then they take charge of the gang?"

"Wouldn't be the first time," Satan answered. "And Jay yellin' at him a few days before won't have helped him none. Anyone who was here that night woulda heard it and that's all it takes for some people."

"So who's in there that might have the balls for something like that?"

Satan looked over his shoulder, into the crowded and extremely noisy bar. "No clue. There's at least four guys in there who want Chuck's job. And another ten that just plain wanted the man dead. So if you're lookin' to work out which one then I wish you the best of luck, son."

Getting back into Chris's truck, Jensen sighed. They were no closer to figuring anything out and the need to see Jay again was becoming a physical ache in his gut. Jay had blanked him the last time he'd seen him, had given up, and that had frustrated him into almost giving up himself. But now he no longer doubted Jay's innocence, he had to get the other man to fight alongside him. He had to show him that he still needed him.

 

 

 

 

 

Jensen stayed overnight at Chris's house, knowing that he would not get a warm welcome if he went home tonight. He also didn't want to give Alan the chance of talking him out of anything. He sent Kenzie a message to her phone so that she could tell their mom that Jensen was all right, but then he turned his phone off and joined Chris on the internet. It turned out that the Crows had their own Myspace page, and a recent post there told them that a new boss had been decided. Chris scrolled through it, scanning over the lines, when Jensen noticed the time that the post had been made.

"That's way before we got to Mickey's tonight. Someone was pretty confident, huh?"

"You think that could be the guy who did it?"

Jensen shrugged. "It's possible."

"There's a link to the guy's personal profile." Chris clicked the mouse button down and another window opened up. A tattooed face that Jensen really didn't recognize looked back at them. He didn't know who the guy was, since the page only listed his gang alias, but he thought he knew someone who would.

"Print out that photo. We need to go see Eric."

"Tonight?"

"No, first thing tomorrow, before we head out to County."

"You know we're going to get no sleep tonight, right?"

Jensen smirked. "Why, what're you planning on doing, Kane?"

Chris nudged him hard in the ribs, shaking his head. "Dick. I just know you. You'll be thinking too hard about this, is all."

Jensen didn't agree out loud, but he knew Chris was right.

 

 

 

 

 

They both wound up unable to sleep; Jensen through thinking too hard and Chris because Jensen couldn't sit still. They wound up turning the TV on at around 3am, with the volume off, and whispering over reruns of South Park. Three hours later, Chris's mom came and told them to get a shower and she'd cook them both some breakfast. Jensen felt guilty and apologised profusely for waking her up, but she told him not to worry and that she'd see him downstairs. They took it in turns to use the bathroom and Chris lent Jensen a clean shirt to go over the jeans he'd worn over last night. Once breakfast was done with, they agreed it was still a little too early to go and see Eric, so they spent a couple of hours tiredly playing video games. Jensen switched his phone on before they started and halfway through the game, while Chris went to use the bathroom, he checked it and saw that he had several missed calls and a couple of messages from his little sister.

He didn't bother replying to either of them. He knew if he did, he'd only worry her even more.

Around mid morning they headed to Eric's place, hoping to catch him in and alone. They were lucky on both counts.

"Jensen," Eric greeted. "And who's this?"

"My friend, Chris. Meet Eric. Best tattoo artist in the state."

Eric snorted as he shook Chris's hand. "Wouldn't go that far, son. What're we looking at doing today?"

"You heard about Jay, right?"

"Sure did. Don't think it's right, not at all, but I can't do anything about it."

Jensen took the photo out of his jacket pocket and unfolded it, handing it to Eric. "Yes, you can. You can tell us where we'd find this guy."

"That's not a guy you want to be looking for, I can tell you that much."

"We tried Mickey's, but we weren't allowed in. They were too busy having a fight."

"Sounds about right. But this guy ain't around Mickey's all that much. He's got a girl that works in one of the other bars in town. He spends more time there unless he's got business to deal with."

"Can you tell us where the bar is?"

"Sure, but you're not going to get in there. Just what are you trying to find out, anyway?"

Jensen explained his theory to Eric, who nodded as he talked and told him that it made a lot of sense. He also told him that there was no way he was going to get Lewis to admit to it.

"His name's Lewis?"

"Lewis Beatty. That's the name on his birth certificate, anyhow."

"How the hell do you know that?" Chris asked.

"Asked for ID the first time he wanted a tattoo off me. Boy didn't look any older than sixteen. Turned out he was." Eric picked up the photo again. "Didn't age well, did he?"

"Not really. So if we can't talk to him, then maybe we can talk to his girlfriend. Who is she?"

Laughing, Eric handed the picture back to Jensen and turned away. "Yeah, good luck with that. Leanna's a real piece of work. She'll eat you boys alive."

"We'll take our chances. Where do we find her?"

 

 

 

 

 

Eric had been right about Leanna, Jensen thought, as he watched her shove a roll of bills down the front of her bra without so much as a backwards glance. Chris was beside him, trying to figure out where the hell he should look, while Jensen rolled his beer bottle between his hands and watched the redhead walk around the bar as if she owned the place. Maybe she did. She was the only girl wearing more than a thong and high heels, after all. And Jensen had to admit, she was pretty easy on the eyes. It was lunchtime, and the bar was half-full with businessmen and the jobless. They had an hour before they could go and see Jared, and Jensen wanted to use it to find out what had really happened. He wanted to be able to go to Jared and tell him that he was going to get him out.

Leanna was walking their way now and Jensen acted fast. He pushed his chair back and caught her arm before she could pass them, pulling her up against him.

She kicked him in the shin, the point of her high-heel connecting painfully with his bone. He winced, but didn't let go.

"You want me to scream the place down, sugar? Could get you beaten to a pulp faster than you could blink."

"I want to talk to you about Lewis and JT," he told her, thinking that if she knew who Jared was at all, then she'd know him by his nickname.

"And just who the hell are you that I should even consider listening?"

"Someone who knows just where you were the night that Chuck died." Jensen knew it was a risk, because he didn't _know_ anything, but the look on Leanna's face at those words filled him with hope. She waited until he relaxed his grip on her, then took his hand and tugged on it, making him follow her out to the back of the bar.

"Who else knows?" She asked, as soon as the door was shut behind them.

"My friend back there. I told him all about it. Listen, all we want is to get JT out of jail. We don't want to put you in there." He lifted a hand and touched her chin. "You're too cute to be in jail."

Her eyes hardened. "Fuck you. Don't patronise me."

"I'm not, I swear. I just don't think you should take the fall for something that Lewis did."

"How do you know his name?"

Jensen shrugged. "I know a lot of things about a lot of people."

Leanna laughed at him. "You sound like an idiot to me."

"Think what you want to think. But I know that Lewis killed Chuck, and I know that you lied to the cops and told them you saw JT coming out of Chuck's house that night. Probably because Lewis threatened to hurt you if you didn't."

She'd stopped smiling. "Who are you? Some fucking _kid_ shouldn't know-"

"I want JT back. I want you to tell me the truth."

"Why should I?"

"Because they'll work it out with or without you. They will. And if they figure out that you lied before you go and tell them you did, then you're the one who's going to be in trouble. You and Lewis both. You know what perjury is, right?"

"I'm not dumb."

"Then you'll do the right thing, won't you?"

Leanna didn't answer, but he could see that she was thinking about it. He let her go, heading back out into the bar and telling Chris it was time to go. They waited outside the bar until they saw Leanna, now dressed in jeans and a tight white teeshirt, leave the building.

"You think it worked?" Chris asked, as they watched her get into a little red convertible parked across the street from where they were sat in his truck.

"I guess we'll know soon enough. She's either going to the cops, or she's going to Lewis. _We_ , however, are going to jail."

Chris grinned as he started up the engine of the truck. "Damn right we are."

 

 

 

 

 

Stomach tight with anticipation, Jensen waited until he was directed where to sit. He'd thought he knew what to expect from watching crime shows on TV, but this was nothing like he had thought it would be. The setting was similar, sure, but the atmosphere was completely different. He heard a door open beyond the partition in front of him and saw Jared and a few other inmates being led to their chairs. He hadn't expected, either, the way that Jared would look. He didn't know why he'd expected him to remain clean-shaven. He didn't know why he'd expected him to look exactly as he had when Jensen had seen him last.

Jared looked tired, still bruised from the fight he had been in, and he had a beard of thick stubble. His hair was curly with sweat around the edges of his collar and there was a cigarette tucked behind his left ear. Jensen frowned at that, but decided not to ask about it at the look Jared gave him then.

"What're you doing here, Jensen?" Jared didn't sound pleased to see him. Just exhausted and annoyed.

"What do you think? I wanted to see you."

"You've seen me. Maybe you should go home now."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm in jail. Do I _look_ fucking okay?"

"Dad told me you were in a fight."

Jared scowled, slouching back in his chair. "I bet he did. Bet he told you I started it too."

"Did you?"

"What the fuck do you think? You just believe every goddamn thing he tells you, Jen. I know that's all he wants from you."

Jensen bit his lip, swallowing down the sick feeling in his throat. "Not everything. I know you didn't kill Chuck. I figured out who did."

"You want a frigging prize?"

"Why the hell are you being such an asshole, Jay?"

"I think I earned the fucking _right_! I've been in here how long, huh? And this is the first time you come see me?"

"After how you gave up on me the last time I saw you, I didn't think you'd want me here."

" _I_ gave up on _you_? You doubted me, right? You wondered for just that brief moment if I could actually kill someone. Thought that maybe I did."

"Jay, I-"

"Admit it. _Please_."

Jared had leaned forward in his chair, his eyes searching Jensen's face. Jensen had no idea what to say, because whatever he did now he thought Jared would end up hating him. He had to opt for the truth.

"The way you tuned me out, I didn't _know_. How the hell did you expect me to react? To just think you were sat there making deals with my Dad because you actually killed someone and needed me out of the way? You want to know what I thought, Jay? I thought that you just didn't love me. I thought that Chris and me... That me telling you about it bothered you more than you said. The way you threatened Chuck the last time we saw him, I thought maybe he pushed you too far. Maybe you fought back too hard. But then I went home and went over it and I knew you couldn't have done it. You're not a killer, Jay. You might talk tough and you might be able to hold your own, but you couldn't kill someone. Not like that."

Jared's angry glare had turned softer and he gazed at Jensen with an expression that the younger man couldn't figure out. "You thought I didn't love you?"

That question wasn't what he had been expecting. It made him feel sad in a way he didn't want to think about. He nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

Jared looked like he wanted to say something else, too, but at that moment they were told that their visit was over. His demeanor changed again and he stood, avoiding Jensen's eyes. Within moments, Jensen was staring at an empty chair and wondering how everything had gone so wrong.


	48. Chapter forty-six

It had been a long time since he'd been there.

It was a sunny day, even if it was chilled. Jeffrey was back to driving, though it wasn't the muscle car. That was still in the shop, being fixed. He'd have her back soon enough. Instead, he had borrowed Trevor's truck when he'd stopped into the Yard that morning to see what was going on.

"How's it going, man?" Trevor had asked. Everyone was genuinely happy to see him, but Jeffrey wasn't happy to see his office. It had been pretty much trashed by the guys, but it wasn't their fault.

"Dude," Jeffrey had complained to him. "Look at what you assholes did to my office."

Trevor had just shrugged and sat down in one of the chairs by Jeffrey's desk -- one that _wasn't_ piled with papers, old McDonald's food bags, and random broken or unused tools. "Hey," he'd chuckled, "while the cat's away, the mice will play."

"Well, the big shot might not be able to walk the yard, but I'll be back soon," he had told the man. "Soon as the doctor gives me a go."

"Good," Trevor had nodded. "It'll almost be nice to have you back."

"Shut up," Jeffrey scolded, though he hadn't really meant it. "I'm under a lot of stress. I could throw you under the wheels of the loader right now and not feel an ounce of remorse."

Trevor hadn't taken the threat seriously and instead had turned serious. "How's my Baby-Jay?"

Jeffrey had sighed and looked over at him. "He's why I'm here, actually. My car's still being fixed and Stevie uses the rental for her and--" He paused. It had been a while since Stevie had taken Jensen to school, but it was still habit to say the boy's name. Jeffrey felt a loneliness sink in to his heart, not only for Jensen, but for Jared as well. "Jay's being released today. Someone came forward, some witness... Pointed the finger elsewhere. Anyway, I was going to take the company truck over to get him."

"That's great!"

"Yeah, only I can't find the goddamn keys," he said, looking accusingly at Trevor.

Chuckling, Trevor had stood up and dug into his jeans pocket. "Here," he said. "Take _my_ truck. I'll straighten up the office later too, so that it's ready for when you want to come back."

Jeffrey had taken the keys from Trevor and smiled gratefully. "Thanks," he'd said. He'd hobbled out of the trailer and over to Trevor's truck. He should have brought his crutches, but they would have just sunk into the ground around the construction site anyway. He was able to put more of his weight on his bad leg anyway.

At the pick up point, Jeffrey got out of the truck and waited for his boy. He could have sent someone else to get him, but he wanted to be the one to pick him up. He had been every other time, and he wasn't going to leave Jared thinking that Jeffrey was unhappy with him. Quite the opposite -- he couldn't wait to get him home.

Leaning against the truck, Jeffrey left it running so that it would be warm when they got back inside. He pulled his coat around his midriff and waited for Jared. He lost track of time, gazing around at some of the other people as he stood there. There was a woman with her little girl, no doubt awaiting Daddy's arrival. Jeffrey was momentarily reminded of one instance where Jared and his mother had been waiting for him. _I probably put him on this path_ , he thought to himself. He reached up and batted his own head with the palm of his hand. Sighing, he looked up and saw that the woman and her daughter had seen him reprimand himself. The woman pulled the little girl closer and told her not to stare at the strange man. Jeffrey wanted to explain that he was just frustrated, but it wouldn't help.

Sighing, he swiped his hands over his beard-stubbled-face and shifted slightly against the truck. When he heard the gates opening, he looked up and saw Jared, in his usual ripped jeans, T-shirt and leather jacket, nearing him.

Jared looked almost relieved when he saw who was waiting for him. He didn't smile at Jeffrey, but when he neared him, he paused for a moment, nodding at his adoptive father. He was going to leave it at that, get in the truck and go home, feeling broken even though he had been cleared of all charges. Jeffrey had other ideas, however. He reached for Jared, yanking him closer and wrapping his arms around him.

Jared let Jeffrey pull him into the embrace. It was almost rough, Jeffrey clinging to him with a ferocity he'd almost forgotten about. Jared closed his eyes and leaned into him even more.

"I've missed you," Jeffrey said gently, words muffled against Jared's leather jacket.

Jared nodded, his chin bumping against Jeffrey's shoulder. "Me too," he returned.

Pulling out of the embrace, Jeffrey kept a handful of Jared's jacket sleeve in his hand, looking up at him. "Are you okay?"

Jared nodded again. "Yeah," he said.

"Are you lying?"

This time, Jared smiled. But it wasn't the smile he used to have. This one was almost forced, careful. Just like when he was a kid. "No," he replied.

Jeffrey took his time, eyeing him. Finally, he clapped Jared on the shoulder. "Alright," he said. "Get into the truck. I'll take you home."

Jared did as he was told, watching as Jeffrey maneuvered himself into the truck. "How's the leg?" he asked, as they settled into the cab.

"A pain," Jeffrey said. "But the doctors say I'll be good as new soon."

"Good."

Jeffrey closed the truck door and shifted a moment more so that his left leg, still in a brace, was settled straight and reasonably comfortably. He shifted into drive and headed away from the prison grounds. The doctors hadn't cleared him to drive, but he wasn't going to miss out on picking his boy up. On the phone, he had asked Jared if Jensen should come along.

"No," Jared had answered quickly.

"Why not, JT?" Jeffrey had asked. "He'll be excited that you're out."

"No," he'd repeated. And that was it.

Jeffrey hadn't pushed it.

Jared stared out the window, glad to be leaving the place behind. He didn't ever want to see it again, hadn't since the day he'd met Jensen. And even though his future with Jensen seemed somewhat bleak, he still wanted to stay away from places like the county prison.

The ride was one of relative silence. Jeffrey asked an occasional question; did Jared eat okay in the joint? The food there is awful, he didn't get sick, did he? Was Old Man Parsons still a CO? Was the relatively-new warden a decent man?

Jared answered the questions with quick words, remaining silent the rest of the time. He knew that Jeffrey felt like it was pulling teeth, talking to him, but Jared just wanted to go home, crawl into his familiar old bed and sleep for the rest of the year. Maybe longer.

The turn they were supposed to take came up, and then quickly vanished. Jared watched it go by and then gestured out the window. "Uh, Jeff?" he asked. "Why didn't you turn?"

Taking a deep breath, Jeffrey draped one arm over the back of the bench seat in the truck. "We're going to take a ride, kiddo."

Jared eyed him warily. "The last time you took me for a ride, you told me the dog was dead," he said.

Jeffrey chuckled, glancing over at him. "Well, the dog's fine," he replied. "She's home and waiting for you."

"Okay," he mumbled, unsmiling. "So, what's up?"

He became serious again, driving down the road with one hand. His other hand touched Jared's shoulder. "It's about Stevie and me."

Jared nodded. "You're getting married, I know," he said.

"Well, we're getting married a little sooner than we'd originally planned," he told him. He took another breath, ready to argue and explain himself until he was blue in the face. "She's pregnant, JT."

It was silent for awhile. Jared thought about what Jeffrey had said and nodded his head. "Okay."

Jeffrey was worried at the lack of emotion from the boy. "But this kid isn't replacing _you_ , dude," he told him. "Ain't no one that can _ever_ do that."

Emotion finally crossed Jared's face. He smiled softly and nodded his head. "I know, Jeff," he said.

He wasn't convinced. "You're my boy, Jay," he continued. "You always will be."

"I know."

"Because I love you."

Jared nodded once more and smiled again. "I know."

Jeffrey glanced from the road to Jared a good number of times, scanning the young man's face. "You're okay with this?"

"I'm okay with this," he returned. "Congratulations, man."

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Think about this."

" _Think_ about what you're doing, Donna."

"If you think for a moment that I'm going to get on my knees and beg..."

Donna let each threat, each snarl, each _word_ go in one ear, and out the other. For the first time in a long time, Alan had no hold over her. She packed up as much of Kenzie's stuff as she could, jammed a few things of her own into a couple boxes and headed out the door. Josh had his own things at Cathy's already. He had known the move was coming.

Jensen packed the boxes into Chris's truck, which he had borrowed earlier in the day. Chris was off with Dani, but he had gladly given Jensen the keys.  
  
"So you _can_ still drive," Chris had teased. "And here I thought your gas pedal foot had atrophied. Fallen right off. Y'know, use it or lose it?"

"Shut up," Jensen had laughed, smacking Chris' shoulder. "Why should _I_ drive, when I have everyone else willing to take me places?"

"Lazy bastard."

Alan watched Jensen step past him, another heavy box in his hands. All of Mackenzie's gaming things. Alan reached out and took hold of his son's arm. "Jensen," he said sternly. "Talk some sense into your mother. Tell her that she cannot _do_ this."

Jensen looked at his father, unsympathetic, and shook his head. "You're about favored-out there, Alan," he said. "Sorry."

Tight-lipped, Alan watched Jensen pass by him, carrying the box out the door. Frustrated, he turned away from them, swiping a hand over his face.

Outside, Jensen set the box into the bed of the truck. "Last one," he said. Kenzie was standing on the front steps, a bag at her feet. She looked sad, but Jensen wondered how many of the tears were ones of relief. He smiled at her and winked. "Don't worry, creep. We'll have you set up in the new place in no time."

"Jen, I'm scared."

His smile faded slightly. He reached out and hugged her, cradling her head against his shoulder. "Everything's going to work out," he told her. "Who knows? This might all blow over before you know it. And just think, I'll help you paint your new room."

"You mean it?"

"Yeah."

"Any color I want?"

"Any color."

"Even hot pink with lime green polka dots and flourescent purple streamers?"

Though she was joking, she did so without so much as a twinkle in her eye, without a spark of happiness in her voice. He chuckled and pulled away from her, just enough to look into her face. "When was the last time I lied to you?"

If she remembered the times he had, she made no mention of them. Instead, she finally smiled and wiped her tears away. She giggled when he held his hand out to her and turned his back. She climbed up onto his back and laughed as he bent down far enough for her to grab her bag. He hauled her down the steps and to the truck, where Mom was already sitting in the passenger's seat.

In the distance, a figure stood half-obscured by a big blue mail box. Jared watched Jensen carry his sister to the truck, both of them laughing as they went. He smiled just slightly, liking the sound of that laughter, remembering it well. His smile faded when he brought a cigarette up to his lips to take a long, slow drag. He faintly heard the truck start, and watched them pull away from the expensive house.

Once again, Jensen seemed to be leaving his life of riches and opportunity behind him. Jared couldn't figure him out.

 

 

 

 

 

She had a sneaky streak in her. Jeffrey learned that about Stevie after a while. She was good at creeping around and keeping things to herself. But usually he caught on just a little too late. This time was no different.

He first got an idea that something was going on when the phone kept ringing.

"Oh, I'll get it!" she'd call from the next room. "Probably for me anyway."

At first, he thought nothing of it. And then he noticed that there was a lot of low talking. He heard Jared's name, and a lot of sympathetic mumbles. As she walked out of the bedroom, turning off the phone, Jeffrey watched her from his place in the sofa chair.

"What's up, babe?" he asked.

"Hm? Oh, nothing," she smiled, continuing on her way.

He folded the paper he was reading and got up from the chair, albeit awkwardly. He hobbled -- crutchless -- over to the kitchen island and sat down at the bar. "You're up to something."

Turning to face him, Stevie scowled. "I am not," she returned.

"You're not planning a surprise party, are you?"

"For who?"

"For me."

"No, why would I do that?" she asked.

"Because my birthday is next month."

"Is it?" she returned, the picture of innocence. "Weird."

Chuckling, Jeffrey shook his head. "You know I can make you talk," he said, his eyes sparkling.

Stevie returned the laugh and leaned in a little closer. "Yes, you can," she agreed. "And if you must know, I'm working on something for your son."

"Jay?"

"You have another one I don't know about?"

"No," he grinned. "Tell me."

"When it's time to, I will."

He watched her plant a quick kiss on his lips and then grab her keys from the hook by the door. She snagged her jacket, too, and opened the front door. "I'll be back in a while!"

Some time passed, just a few days, and he forgot about the whole thing. The phone stopped ringing as much, and Stevie was back to normal. She wasn't sneaking around anymore. Jeffrey forgot to ask any more about what she had planned. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

Until the weekend, when Jeffrey had fallen asleep in the sofa chair. He awoke to the sound of a loud motor outside. He was disoriented at first, and thought someone was taking the muscle car. He woke with a start and sat up in the chair. When he couldn't move quickly, he looked down at the soft-cast on his leg.

"Son of a bitch," he grumbled, tired of the impairment. He sat up straighter in the chair and looked out the window. Stevie hopped out of a truck. Behind her was Dani, Chris Kane's girlfriend. Around the opposite side of the truck, the driver's side, emerged Chris. A moment later, Jensen himself showed his face.

Chris had a tube-like barbecue smoker in his hands, dragging it out of the bed of the truck. Stevie pointed to the garage, gesturing emphatically as she always did. Chris carried the smoker to where Jeffrey's own barbecue grill was already sitting, Dani not far behind him. Jensen pushed a blue, plastic cooler to the edge of the tailgate, and then hopped down. He took the cooler off the truck and nodded to where Chris had gone. Stevie apparently agreed, directing Jensen to put the cooler nearby.

"What the hell?" Jeffrey asked no one. He got up and walk stiff-legged over to the front door. "You havin' a party?" he called to them.

Stevie turned, shielding her eyes from the sun that was starting to set behind the house. "Yeah, actually," she said. "Come help."

He knew she was humoring him; he couldn't help all that much. But he could straw-boss. And she was so beautiful, standing there in the sunlight, that he couldn't resist.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hot water was a gift from the gods, Jared decided. Standing in the shower, he set both hands upon the tile and leaned against his inked arms. He let the spray hit him directly upon the forehead, the water cascading down his face, neck, arms and chest. He kept his eyes closed, his mouth open to breathe, and let the warm water wash away some of the memories of prison. The showers there weren't nearly as comforting. Eyes were always on you. Jared swore he could feel the crow tattoo burning into his skin. He decided to call Eric soon and have it covered up. He was tired of having the reminder of the past on his back. And it had proved to come back to haunt him after all.

After each shower at home, Jared felt a tiny bit of himself return. As if, with each wash, he was getting rid of a small portion of the prison grime. His bruises had all but healed up, save for a stubborn few, and he was looking back to normal again. Out of the shower, he toweled off and pulled on a pair of ripped jeans and a T-shirt that had clearly seen better days. He didn't care about the hole under the arm, nor the threadbare hem around the collar, sleeves and waist. In bare feet and carrying his wet towel, he stepped along the hallway and down the stairs, stopping short when he moved into the living room.

Jensen was there, staring back at him.

Jeffrey hadn't been sure that Jared would be okay with seeing Jensen again, but, quite honestly, he was tired of tip-toeing around the boy regarding Jensen. Granted, Jeffrey had a soft-spot for Jared, and he was willing to give him time to heal. But Jared was being pig-headed and stubborn, and he needed to face things, get back to life.

Both of them looked like the proverbial deer caught in headlights. They stared at each other, neither knowing what to say. Stevie only watched them, her sneaky plan finally complete. She had spoken to Donna repeatedly about getting the boys to talk to each other again. Jensen was wholly willing, she knew. It was Jared that needed convincing. Stevie didn't give him a chance to refuse her though. Instead, she set up the meeting to shove Jared back into life.

"Jared?"

Jensen's voice was soft, gentle. _So many memories there_ , Jared thought. He nodded, unable to speak for a moment. "Yeah," he finally managed.

Chris glanced over at Jeffrey and Stevie. He had known about Stevie's plan, had been part of it all. There had been more than enough room to have a party at Donna's new condo, but she claimed cramped quarters so that Jeffrey would offer to have the party there.

_All so cunning_ , Jeffrey thought, nodding at Stevie.

"When did you get out?" Jensen asked.

He seemed wounded, Jared thought. He felt a moment of remorse tug at his heart. "Um," he began, looking down at the dirty towel in his hands. "A few...a few days."

Jensen should have been relieved, but he wasn't. Instead, he felt more than just a little betrayed. Jared hadn't wanted him to know. He turned away, hands on his hips.

"I gotta go," Jared said. By trying to protect Jensen from him, he'd only ended up hurting him. He had a need to get on his bike and drive until the gas tank was empty. His fingers itched to feel the bike vibrating against his skin, taking him far from his woes.

"Jared?"

He stopped short and turned to look at Stevie.

"I need to you to pick up a few things for me," she said. "We're having a birthday party for Jensen. Can I give you a list?"

He didn't want to be there, didn't want to be part of the festivities. He looked at Jeffrey and saw the man nod at him, encouraging him. His eyes moved back to Stevie and he nodded at her. "Okay," he agreed. "Just let me get some boots on."

Stevie smiled and moved to the refrigerator, where she kept the grocery list.

 

 

 

 

He had been put in charge of grilling. Jared was pretty sure it was to keep him there, so that he couldn't drive off on the Suicycle. Jeffrey was in a lawn chair, his leg propped up on Stevie's chair. Chris and Jensen sat side-by-side, Dani resting on Chris' knee. A chair sat empty beside Jensen. Jared had only sat down for a little while, sporadically joining in on the laughing and conversation. They didn't talk about Jared's short stint in prison, and he didn't offer any information. He was glad about that.

Donna, Kenzie, Josh and Cathy showed up a little bit late, but they all finally sat down in their lawn chairs and had dinner, laughing and talking with each other. Jensen felt part of something wonderful, and Jared was quickly reminded of how great his family really was. Even Shelby was in on everything, running around the yard, caught between wanting to play with Kenzie, or beg for more food from Jared.

After hotdogs and hamburgers, and plenty of beer, Chris covered Jensen's eyes as the cake was brought out.

"It's not like I don't know what you're doing," he said, laughing.

"Shut up," Chris said. "Act surprised."

The cake was set on a small, plastic lawn table, candles burning brightly in the chilly night, offset by the chimera burning warmly nearby.

"Wow, a birthday cake!" he said, acting badly. "I never would have suspected a thing!"

Jared laughed at his hammy acting and took another swig of beer. Everyone but him sang happy birthday, and Kenzie added in something about a monkey in a zoo. As Jensen blew out the candles, he lit a cigarette and headed to the end of the driveway to smoke in relative peace. After a few minutes, Jensen stepped closer, handing him a piece of cake on a paper plate. Jared took it from him, inhaling one last drag from the cigarette before tossing it away.

Jensen watched him, picking up his plastic fork. "When did you pick that up?" he asked, hoping he didn't sound judgmental.

"I told you I smoked before," Jared reminded him. He took a bite of cake, conveniently avoiding Jensen's eyes the whole time.

"I know," he shrugged. "I was just wondering if it was because of nerves."

"Nerves?"

"Yeah, from being back in prison."

Jared looked at him this time, but he didn't seem angry at the mention of County. He shrugged, looking back down at his cake. "Maybe," he said.

It was quiet for a few minutes, neither of them particularly interested in the cake they were eating. Finally, Jensen spoke.

"I'm sorry about everyth--"

"Don't apologize," Jared interrupted. "Just do me a favor?"

"What?"

Jared took a deep breath and sighed. "You have a good future going for yourself," he nodded. "Make a good life for you and... Whoever."

The request annoyed Jensen more than it comforted him. "You know what?" he said. "I hate to break it to you, but you're _part_ of that future, you big _jerk_."

Jared was taken aback. "Why are you calling me a jerk?" he asked. "I wish you well, and you call me a _jerk_?"

"Yes," he nodded. "Because you _are_. You're so busy wallowing that you haven't taken notice of anything around you. Look at all these people who love you, regardless of what's happened. They've had their own amount of shit happen too, but they're not dwelling on it. _You_ , however, are. So if you got your head out of your ass, you'd realize that _I_ chose my own future. And last I checked, you were a big part of it."

Jared didn't know what to say. He stood there at the end of the driveway, somewhat stunned. He watched Jensen turn on his heel and start to walk away. "Hey," he found himself saying.

Jensen turned back around again, looking at Jared, still angry with him. "What?"

Frowning, Jared looked down at the cracked pavement for a moment, then back over to Jensen. He nodded, trying to smile. "I missed you."

Jensen closed his eyes, briefly, then looked straight into Jared's. "Well, you don't have to anymore," he returned.

 

 

 

 

 

Donna left Jeffrey's house around midnight, as did Josh and Cathy. Chris hefted Kenzie into his arms, and while Josh and Cathy headed out in Josh's car, Chris tucked Dani, Donna and Kenzie into his truck. He gave Jensen a hug, holding him close for several seconds.

"There's still room in the back, son," he said, throwing a thumb back at the truck.

Standing beside Jared, Jeffrey nudged his adoptive son with his elbow.

Jared knew what the nudge was about and frowned just slightly. He still didn't feel up to any of it, regardless of Jensen's earlier reprimand. Regardless, he reached up to massage the back of his neck, taking a step forward. "Jen?"

Jensen turned and looked at Jared. There wasn't any further conversation between them, yet he understood. "I'll be okay," he said, looking back over at Chris. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Alright," he agreed. "Happy birthday, man."

"Thanks." He watched Chris get into the truck. He waved as they pulled away from the house, turning around in the middle of the street to head back home. He remained at the end of the driveway, alone, until Jeffrey spoke.

"Alright, kids," he said, loud enough for Jensen to hear too. "We're off to bed. We're pretty tired, so I doubt we'll hear a _thing_."

Jared had to smile. He shook his head and watched Jeffrey and Stevie move back into the house. "Subtle," he called to him.

Jeffrey just gave him a thumbs-up sign and continued on his way.

Jensen moved closer, a smile on his face as well. He made a mental note to thank Jeffrey and Stevie for the party when he saw them the next morning, even though he'd already said a thank-you. "So," he said, having no intention of continuing.

Jared scratched at his chin and eyed the young man. "Movie?" he asked.

Jensen smiled brighter. "Movie," he agreed with a nod.  
  
In the garage, Jared put in a Jackie Chan flick. They started out watching it, but eventually lost track of it when they started talking. Regardless of how much he didn't want to socialize, Jared found it much easier to talk than he'd thought it'd be. Jensen asked questions about prison, what it was like, if anyone hurt him, what the fight had been over, who helped him.

"So, it was just over the crow?"

Jared chuckled. He looked down at Jensen, who was laying down on the sofa, his head rested on Jared's thigh. "That crow's a big deal, Jen," he said. "I did a lot of bad shit to get that."

"Like what?"

"Like..." He paused for a moment, debating on whether or not to go through with telling him everything. "Like a lot of bad shit."

"Did you kill someone?"

Jared only looked at him.

"No," Jensen said, answering his own question. "Did you steal?"

"Yes."

"Did you steal something big?"

He nodded. "Yes."

"Did you rob a bank?"

"No," he said.

"Did you steal a car?"

"Yes."

"A motorcycle?"

"More than once," he agreed.

"Did you commit arson?"

"Twice," Jared nodded. "Once for insurance fraud, and once just for revenge."

"Did you bust a cap in someone's ass?"

The question was asked with such innocence, and not an ounce of street-wise slang to it, that Jared couldn't help but laugh, his head rocking back. It felt good to laugh like he used to. "Yes," he answered. "I busted many a cap."

"What happened to Horton?"

Seriousness returned, and Jared's smile faded. He thought about the letter; how, when he dropped it into the mail box, it had sounded hollow and sad. "I don't know. Nothing, I hope," he answered, but he wondered if he was trying to convince Jensen of that, or perhaps himself.

Jensen sensed a need for silence. They watched the movie for a minute or two, Jared's hand coming to rest at Jensen's chest.

"Why were you so angry with me?" Jensen finally asked.

Jared bit at his bottom lip for a second. "I was mad at everyone."

"I'm sorry."

The apology infuriated Jared. He pushed Jensen off of him, making him sit up. "Don't... _Stop_ saying you're sorry."

He nodded. "Okay," he agreed. "Why?"

"Because _I'm_ sorry."

His brow creased in curiosity. "For what?"

Jared sighed. "For fucking up your life," he said.

Jensen shook his head. "You're not."

"Jen, I'm drowning, and I'm taking you down with me."

Jensen took a deep breath and sighed aloud. He'd had it. He crawled atop Jared, straddling the man's lap, turning to face him. He sat there, just looking at him for a moment. "I've told you once, and I'll tell you again," he finally said after a good measure of silence. "I'm a big boy. I can make my own decisions."

Jared gazed up at him. He had so much going on in his head. So many voices pulling him in ten million different directions. "But I'm a _bad_ one," he said softly, shaking his head.

Jensen smiled and returned the shake of the head. "You're the _best_ one," he said.

Jared could see Jensen moving in for a kiss. He shook his head again, more trying to avoid the embrace than anything else. But Jensen was insistent. Jared felt the young man's hands at either side of his face, holding him there. The kiss was soft, innocent and mostly one-sided. Jared returned it, but only half-heartedly.

Jensen traced a fingertip along Jared's brow, leaning into him again. "You're so beautiful," he whispered, his lips grazing against Jared's. He'd never told him such a thing before, even though he'd thought it a million times. He wasn't going to hold back such things anymore.

Reluctantly, Jared kissed him. His hands were at Jensen's waist. He could haul him off of his lap any time he wanted to. But he _didn't_ want to. "Jen," he warned, trying to shake his head again.

Jensen coerced another kiss out of Jared. This time, the embrace deepened and Jared's hands crawled up Jensen's back. When Jared's fingers wound their way into Jensen's hair, the kiss turned needful and brutal. Jensen repaid the favor, twisting Jared's locks around his own fingers. He used his teeth in the kiss, scraping them along Jared's jaw, up to his ear and then back down to his mouth again. Jared's breathing was already erratic, which sent a rush of adrenaline through Jensen's system. The fact that he could do _that_ to Jared always gave him a high.

Hands sliding down, Jensen took hold of the ratty hem on Jared's tee. He pulled at it, tugging the shirt over Jared's head. Almost immediately, Jensen noticed the absence of the nipple rings. "They're gone," he said, gently grazing his fingers over the dark pink flesh.

Jared nodded, looking down at his chest. "Can't have them in the joint," he said. "I'll get 'em again."

Jensen smiled devilishly. "Can I watch?"

Slowly, Jared returned the smile. "Yeah," he agreed. "I think maybe."

Jensen chuckled softly and bent down. Even though it was a little awkward, he bent his body enough to take one of Jared's nipples into his mouth. He nipped carefully and lapped away the pain he'd caused, feeling Jared arch against him.

It felt different without the rings. Not a bad kind of different, but maybe the kind that made him nostalgic in a way, remembering the days before the rings. It woud be fun to get them again, to rediscover the sensations again. Eyes closed, Jared reached out to Jensen, pressing a hand to the back of the young man's head. He opened his eyes long enough to watch Jensen switch to the other side of his chest, then closed his eyes again, his head rocking back.

Jensen worked his way back up to Jared's neck, finding all of the old places that he knew made him weak. He felt chills rise up on Jared's skin, felt the man's arms tighten around him as he nipped at his ear, kissed his way back down to Jared's mouth.

Clinging to him, Jared looked up at Jensen. They remained close enough to kiss, but didn't. Instead, they merely breathed each other in. Their chests heaved against each other's, their eyes darkened with lust. Jensen gave Jared a fleeting, barely-noticeable kiss, their lips grazing slightly over one another's.

"Jen..."

Jensen looked into Jared's eyes, waiting for another protest, another demand that Jensen move on with his life. He was prepared to fight, but Jared didn't make such a remark. Instead, he said something else. Something he'd wanted to say for too long.

"I love you."

This time, chills flashed across Jensen's skin. He stared down at Jared, surprised. It seemed like forever before he blinked, a smile slowly spreading across his face. He nodded at Jared, his heart swelling with love. "I know," he whispered back.


	49. Chapter forty-seven

They wound up in bed just before midnight. It wasn't reluctant in any way, as they had both missed this, but it was hesitant and slow at first. Jared wanted to take his time, map out Jensen's skin with his fingers and tongue, savoring the familiarity as well as the newness of it. It all felt different now, and perhaps the old adage about absence and fond hearts was true. It certainly wasn't one-sided, though. Jensen did not let a touch go unanswered, or a kiss unmet. Jared caged him in his arms, nipping and sucking at his skin. He kicked off the covers until all they had left to hide beneath were their tattoos.

These tattoos were what Jared concentrated on now, running his fingertips over the dark lines, tracing promises deeper into Jensen's skin than any ink could run. "You're beautiful, too," he whispered, lips brushing against the hollow of Jensen's throat. "And mine."

Jensen breathed out, nodded an agreement. He didn't want to be anyone else's. He didn't flinch when Jared pushed one lube-slicked finger into him a few moments later. His eyes opened a little wider, pupils dark with need. Jared wouldn't let up kissing him either, and his mouth was a hell of a distraction. Counting in weeks, it really hadn't been that long, but Jensen still felt as though he had missed having this. Jared spread more KY over his fingers, opened Jensen up to him again.

Jensen had pulled his legs up, bending them at the knee to plant his feet down firm on the mattress. Jared turned his head to kiss the inside of Jensen's thigh, the light touch somehow connecting directly to Jensen's every muscle. They all tightened in response and he whined at the feel of Jared's fingers inside him.

"Do it.." He gasped the instruction out, forgetting how Jared had this ability to make him incapable of full speech.

Jared didn't answer. He just withdrew his fingers, the movement sounding obscene and wet in the silence between them. At the sudden emptiness came a rush of memories, of every time they had done this, and Jensen knew then exactly what he wanted.

He reached down, tugging on Jared's hair, his shoulder, and maneuvred him onto his back. Jared didn't argue, just went with it. Jensen kissed his mouth slowly, reaching across him for the condom he had ready. He unwrapped it, Jared helping him along with his teeth, and smoothed the rubber down over Jared's dick, giving him a couple of tight strokes just to hear him moan.

"Jen?"

Jared watched as Jensen shifted, moving onto his knees, and held his breath when the younger man eased one leg over Jared's waist, skin sliding across sweaty skin. He slid down, teasing him at first, just letting the head of Jared's cock nudge against him. Jared ground his teeth down together when Jensen finally pushed down onto him, shaking with a silent laugh at the sudden loud groan that seemed to echo around the still garage. No way had nobody else heard that, he thought. But then he didn't care, because Jensen was flush against him, still tight around him, and he wasn't moving right away. Jared watched his face. He loved the way he looked right then. He almost wished he had Jensen's camera in his hands so that he could capture this moment, although he knew, or hoped, that he would get to see it again.

Jensen breathed out then, in a rush, and he moved as he exhaled. Jared gripped his hips loosely, keeping him steady, and lifted his hips to meet him as Jensen sank back down again. The sound he made this time was quieter, between a groan and a whimper, and Jared found himself pressing his fingertips in with the next push together in an effort to coax more out of him. He felt proud of the bitten off yell he got for his work, like he _wanted_ Jeff and Stevie to know how well their dumb plan had worked. The whole street would probably know soon, he thought, as the next slam home made Jensen curse loudly and then moan again as he started to come. His muscles contracted again and his voice sounded strangled and tight on every breath out.

Jared moved one hand up to Jensen's arm, feeling how tense it was. He traced the lines of tattoos, gripping harder as he kept working, kept moving. He blew at his upper lip, licked away the sweat, and blinked his eyes to clear his vision. He was so fucking close, he knew it. It had been too long for him to make this last. Almost six weeks without Jensen and it had been unbearable.

Jensen's palms slapped down against his chest then, startling him. He felt a curl of pleasure and need and something else uncoil inside him as he realized that he was being held down. He stayed put, feeling it from his toes to the top of his scalp when Jensen lifted up and then eased back down so slow, so goddamn _slow_ , that Jared thought he might pass out.

"Don't... Don't fuckin-" He was going to say 'stop', but then he was coming, his cock jerking inside Jensen's body, filling the condom as he shook.

Jensen fell into him, gasping for breath, sweat dripping from the tips of his hair. He didn't want to move, not ever, he just wanted to stay there with Jared's dick deep inside him, Jared underneath him, holding him.

"Up," Jared told him. Seemed like he had other ideas. "Up," he repeated, the only word he could manage at that moment. He wanted rid of the condom, wanted to get that out of the way so he knew he could come back to Jensen and not have to move again for the rest of the night. Jensen obliged after a couple more seconds, and gladly let Jared envelop him in his arms when he returned to the bed. "Best sex ever?" Jared asked, kissing Jensen's shoulder.

"Hmm. Definitely top five," came the answer, followed by a quiet laugh and a protest at the stinging nip that Jared administered to Jensen's neck. "Hey, the other four are all you as well," Jensen reminded him, pushing a hand against Jared's brow to make him move. He stopped teasing, moving instead to kiss Jensen's mouth, sure and slow.

 

 

 

 

 

 

"So, are you going to tell me what it was that you did?"

That was the first thing that Jared asked the next morning, while they were still in bed, comfortable and warm with sleep.

"Hmm?"

"I figure you and Jeff were the only two who gave a shit that I was in jail and shouldn't have been, and since Jeff was kind of an invalid at the time..."

"Oh," Jensen nodded. "Well. Didn't Alan tell you?"

"He said a new witness came forward. They raided the house of someone from Chuck's gang-"

"Lewis," Jensen interrupted. "The guy who killed Chuck. His name was Lewis. Me and Chris had a word with his girlfriend. So she must have confessed."

Jared shook his head. "You're crazy."

"So did Lewis get arrested for it?"

"Your Dad said they had the guy in custody, so I suppose so. Said they found a bunch of guns and some of Chuck's things there. Keys to one of his bikes."

"Sounds like Lewis was a regular brainiac."

"Guess he didn't count on you and Columbo."

"If Chris is Columbo, then-"

"You're Jessica Fletcher."

Jensen laughed, shoving Jared's shoulder. "Asshole."

"Did you mean what you said last night?" Jared asked, face serious again. Jensen didn't need to ask what about.

"Every word," he replied. "I don't see anything in my future if I can't have it with you."

"Me either."

"Although for the present..."

"What?" Jared prompted.

"I kind of need to stay with Mom and Kenzie for a while. Just to make sure they're okay. I want to get back on track with my studying, so I don't have to worry about when I go back to school after the summer. I want to be with you when it's done, but I think 'til then it's best that I live there. You're too much of a distraction."

Jared frowned. "Oh."

Jensen sighed. "Please don't be mad at me. It's only for a couple of months, until graduation. I need to know that my family will be settled."

"Yeah, I know." Jared leaned down, kissed Jensen's shoulder softly. "Do I get to come over now and again to check on you?"

"At the weekends," Jensen agreed. "And every night, when I'm done studying, I'll call you."

"What if I'm working back at Mickey's?"

"Then you can call me on your break. We'll figure it out, Jay."

Jared still looked unsure of the idea, but he nodded in quiet acquiescence.

"I'll come stay here the night before the wedding, too."

"The whole night?"

"Of course the whole night."

"And when you've graduated, then what?"

"Then we find our own place. And you start looking for a day job so that I know you're doing something constructive while I'm at school."

"You got this all planned out, huh?"

Jensen grinned. "You wanna hear what our kids will be called?"

A laugh exploded out of Jared and he slapped Jensen firmly on the back. "Prick."

"I just wanted you to know how much I meant it, is all."

"I believe you. I'm just going to miss you."

"It's not for that long. Not really. And I'm still here now."

"How long can you stay? Or how long _will_ you stay?"

"Today? As long as you want me to."

Jared smiled, satisfied with that answer, and reached around to kiss the other man again. They held onto one another, pressed together, moving in a familiar rhythm, Jensen's face pressed to Jared's neck as he struggled to keep control. It was a losing battle, though, and he surrendered quickly, letting Jared do what he wanted. Easier that way.

 

 

 

 

Later still, the pair stumbled into the house in their pajama bottoms, tousled and sated, so that they could both take a shower. Jensen tried to protest when Jared joined him under the spray, pressing him up to the tiles and stroking his dick, but he knew that Jared was just making the most of what was left of the day ahead. And he certainly gave up trying to complain when Jared pulled him out of the shower and went down on his knees. He spread his fingers through Jared's wet hair, his eyes closed as he breathed through his mouth and tried not to cry out too loud.

Back from their walk when the two boys returned downstairs, Jeff and Stevie both had knowing smiles on their faces when they saw them. Jensen managed not to blush and Jared simply grinned, wide and bright.

"So," Stevie began. Breakfast?"

"Hell yes!" Jared exclaimed. "I could eat a goddamn horse."

"Well, we don't have any horses, but how does bacon, eggs and hash browns sound?"

"Sounds good," Jensen said. "You want some help?"

"Yes, actually. Jeff has something that he wants to talk to Jared about."

"Okay..."

 

 

 

 

The moment Jeff and Jared had gone outside, Jensen asked Stevie if she knew what the discussion was about.

"I don't really know. Something to do with the wedding, though. Oh, that reminds me, could you take out invites to your family for me? We don't want to invite a lot of people, but it'd be really nice if they were there."

"You know my mom will cry, right?"

Stevie laughed at that. "I'm sure she won't be the only one."

They worked side by side in quiet for a while, Stevie cracking eggs while Jensen made up some hash browns to fry.

 

 

"Can I ask something?"

Jensen looked around. "Sure, of course."

"What made Donna decide to leave Alan in the end?"

He shrugged, frowning. "We argued, me and Dad. I told him it was his fault that Jay was in jail and he told me it was mine. Mom got in the middle of it and..." Jensen trailed off, lifting his shoulders again. He concentrated on the pan, not looking up when Stevie put an arm around his shoulders.

"She's better off. Might not seem that way for a little while, when you see all the things you suddenly don't have, but she _is_ better off."

"I know. I think when Dad threw me out that first time she still hoped he'd see sense, you know? But he's never.... He never hit her before and I think it made her realize that it was _her_ that needed to see sense."

"I'm sorry it came to that, Jen."

"You know what the strange thing is? I don't think she's sorry at all. I think she's relieved. And we'll manage. They'll have it easier when I leave. I know that, but we'll manage."

"Everyone always does, somehow."

"I haven't told Jay why we left. I think he hates my Dad enough as it is."

"I suppose that's not surprising. But you know that me and Jeff are your family too and I'm sure that he'll always be there for fatherly advice."

Jensen ducked his head down, smiling. "I know."

Stevie squeezed his shoulder before letting go. "Not that you need any advice on some things, from the sounds of it."

This time he couldn't stop the blush. "Sorry. Again."

"Don't be. Maybe some night me and Jeff'll keep _you_ awake."

"Uh..."

"Although more likely it'll be the baby that does that."

"Well, you know, me and Jay thought about looking for own place, before the baby comes. Just to give you the extra space."

"Ah, well. So long as that doesn't mean you skipping out on baby-sitting duties."

"No, ma'am. We'll sit on any babies that need it."

He chuckled as Stevie bumped his hip, tutting loudly, and they were soon both laughing.

Breakfast was all ready and on the table by the time Jeff came back inside with Jared. At least Jared was smiling, Jensen thought. It definitely hadn't been anything bad.


	50. Chapter forty-eight

  
Author's notes: Two chapters today!  
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* * *

Jensen had almost thought he might get away without any more sex for the rest of the day, but then Jared announced halfway through breakfast that he was dragging him to Eric's while he got his nipples re-pierced and a tattoo consultation. After that, he knew that getting too turned on to bear it was probably inevitable.

They headed out to Eric's place within the hour, Jensen making Jay promise that he would behave before they set off. He knew he probably wouldn't, but it was worth a shot. It felt good to be on the bike again. Jensen thought he might have to get his own license for one, for when he started school after the summer, as he couldn't imagine driving a car there and back each day. The bike was more free, and the feel of the rumbling metal between his legs and the leather of Jared's jacket beneath one hand was a huge turn on.

Eric's looked a little busy for a Sunday, but Jensen supposed that now the weather was starting to pick up again then it was only natural. Jared parked the bike and Jensen felt the vibrations of it settling down echo through his body as he got off it. He followed Jared up to the doors, checking out a couple of new designs on display in the window before going inside.

Eric smiled widely when he saw them both, grabbing Jay's hand and shaking it before he pulled him in for a quick hug. "Jay, it's good to see my best customer out and about again."

"Good to _be_ here again, man. Figured I'd bring Jen too in case he saw something he might want."

Jensen smiled at that. Jared clearly knew what he was thinking and, apparently, so did Eric. "New on in the window, huh?"

He nodded. "Looks like you had me in mind."

"Had it in mind last time I saw the pair of you together. Just took me 'til now to have the time to do it justice. Say the word and it's yours."

"Definitely," Jensen replied, feeling a tug of excitement as he watched Eric move to take the design down from the window.

"When?" Eric asked, as they followed him to his work area.

"Uh, before I graduate? I'll be done with papers and tests so.. Second weekend in May?"

Eric checked his diary quickly. "Have to be after hours, both days. I'm busy otherwise."

"Sure, no problem."

"Both of you, right? 'Cause I'm just assuming now that Jay wants the other half."

"You know me too well," Jared agreed.

"Tattoo a person enough times and it becomes second nature. But today it's piercing?"

"Yeah. They healed up pretty quick. Couple of weeks."

"From what I heard about what you got up to, it was probably just as well. C'mon then, let's do this. And no funny business from either of you boys."

"I promise to be good," Jay told him. "Just can't say the same for Jensen. The boy's some kind of deviant."

"Shut up," Jensen laughed, shaking his head.

Jay laid back on the bed, after pulling his shirt off and dumping it to one side. "It's true. You get turned on by this, don't deny it. See the way you're looking at me right now? You're already wishing we were fucking right this second."

Jensen shook his head again, told Jay he was deluding himself. "I've seen hotter sights," he said, getting up on the chair opposite where Eric was now stood.

"Yeah, but I already told you that Eric won't let me get naked when he has other customers."

"Jerk."

"Are we doing this or are you two just going to bitch each other out all morning?" Eric asked, interrupting Jared's retort.

"We're doing this," Jared said, firmly, and laid back.

Jensen watched in fascination as Eric cleaned off Jared's nipples, felt his dick stirring as he watched him prep the needle he was going to use. He knew that Jared would probably want to test the new rings out before he let Jensen go for the day, and he was looking forward to it more with each passing moment. The piercing itself looked like it should have been uncomfortable, but when Jensen lifted his eyes from Jared's chest to his face, he saw that he was being watched with a pleased half-smile. Jared licked his lips, tongue darting out, and Jensen shifted in his chair. He caught the look that Eric gave him then and quickly stood, wanting to have an excuse to look elsewhere for a couple of seconds so he could compose himself again. He listened to Eric and Jared plan the cover-up of the crow tattoo on the latter's back, but he was distracted by the thought of what he would be doing once they got back to Jeff's place. What would be done to _him_.

"You look about a million miles away," Jared whispered, his mouth brushing against the shell of Jensen's ear. It startled him, he hadn't realized that Jared was done, and he let himself be pulled back into Jared's arms and tilted his head slightly so that the other man could kiss his throat.

"Just a couple miles," he answered. "Thinking about your bed."

"Be there soon enough. How long can you stay?"

"Long as you want," Jensen answered.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The week without Jared was harder than Jensen thought. It seemed he was still a distraction even if he wasn't there, but after a couple of late night phone calls he thought he would be able to manage it. Chris came over every other night to study with him, which helped his concentration because he wouldn't let him drift off into a daydream until everything was done. His sister sat with him each night, working on her own homework and otherwise sitting quietly, thinking about who knew what. He had noticed she'd become quieter since the move, which was a worry. He thought that having Jared over that weekend to help with some decorating would probably cheer her up.

His mom seemed okay, at least. She had plenty of friends in spite of Alan and it hadn't taken her long to use her connections to get herself a job that paid what she needed. Stevie had been right; there were a lot of things that they had been used to which were now sacrificed in favor of more necessary things, but nobody seemed to mind. The atmosphere without Alan around was better, they all knew that. Even Josh was more talkative towards his brother now, and brought Cathy over for dinner twice during the week. They were getting on with decorating their own place and Jensen knew that now they were engaged, Josh was looking to start a family with his future wife.

He had passed on Stevie's invitation to all of them for the wedding, which was scheduled to be in a couple of weeks' time. Stevie was just slim enough that her slight bump wasn't too obvious yet, and she wanted to get married before she no longer fit into the dress that she had picked out. The plan for the wedding was that Stevie would come to the condo and stay with Donna and Kenzie the night before, while Jensen would go and stay with Jeff and Jared, straight after school. He was looking forward to it. A chance to see everyone together again, and to see Jeffrey get everything he wanted, just like he deserved. If there had been a way for Jensen to show his gratitude to the man, he would have. He just didn't think that there was anything that could quite get through how thankful he was to have both him and his son as part of his life.

Jared called early Friday night, while Jensen was still doing his homework. He was due over first thing the following morning. Jensen had a feeling he was looking to bring that forward and it seemed he was right.

"Guess what I did today."

Jensen looked down at his paper. One thousand words left to go. He could probably manage that within the next hour. "What?" He asked, settling back in his chair and cradling the phone against his ear.

"I got that tattoo that I talked about with Eric. The coverup? I thought maybe I could come over tonight and show you it. Stay the night. You think your mom would mind?"

"Maybe if you gagged me," Jensen murmured, with a low chuckle. "What're you doing getting tattoos, anyhow? Shouldn't you be doing something constructive?"

"I tried constructive and I hurt myself, so Stevie told me to stop. Jeff reckons I'm a pain in the ass when I'm helpful."

"Ah, he could be right. Mom's not here right now, anyway. She took Kenzie to the movies, to try and cheer her up."

"So, that's a yes, right?"

"Yeah, but I've got some homework still to do so if you get here before I finish, then you're going to sit there and be real quiet and _not_ try and jump me in any way."

Jared laughed quietly at that. "Scout's honour."

Jensen knew he probably didn't mean it, so he asked Jared to get them some beer and chips on his way over, just to delay him a little bit more. As soon as he hung up he got on with his studies, knowing that he would have to finish it now otherwise he wouldn't get a chance. He managed it, and quickly sent his mom a message to let her know that Jared would be there when they got back. He knew she would check once she got out of the movies, to make sure nothing terrible had happened.

About forty-five minutes after he had said goodbye to Jared on the phone, the other man showed up at the door of the apartment with a six pack in one hand and a bag of doritos in the other. "So I got everything you asked for. You done studying?"

Jensen nodded. "Just." He stepped aside to let Jared in, holding on to the edge of the door when Jared leaned in for a kiss.

"Good."

They shut the door, and Jared followed Jensen into the lounge. His mom had done a lot in the last couple of weeks to get the place looking spotless, but it looked much more lived in than the house they had been in. Jared liked it immediately. When he saw the wide couch in front of the large TV, he liked it even more. Jensen saw him looking and grinned.

"Mom managed to rescue a few things from the house. Didn't take long to let Dad know that he wasn't keeping everything."

"I'm liking your mom more and more," Jared said. "What're we doing?"

"We could watch a movie or just... I don't know."

"I'm thinking 'I don't know' sounds good."

Jensen had figured as much. He turned the TV on anyway, just for some background noise, and then pulled Jared down onto the couch with him. The beers were dropped onto the floor, along with the chips, and both were quickly forgotten as the two men got comfortable. Jensen felt like this was how his home should be, having Jared's arms loose around him and Jared's mouth hard against his.

"Missed you this week," Jared murmured, as they pulled apart.

"Missed you too."

"How's your studying been going?"

"All right. I'm trying to believe that there's only a month and a half 'til graduation. Trying to work out what the hell we're going to do after that."

"Don't worry about that right now. I'm not being lazy, I swear. I'm saving up."

"How? You back working at Mickey's? You never said-"

"I'm not back there. Not yet. I might pick some shifts up after the summer, but before then I need something that's not so rigid. And I need my Saturday nights free so I can come see you."

"I guess. So what're you doing? Robbing banks again, huh?"

Jared laughed at that. "Damn, you guessed. I'm fixing bikes and cars. Nothing full time, just.. Friends of friends. Eric's friends, mostly."

"Well, that's good, right? Keeps you busy."

"Not too busy to keep me from you, though."

"Speaking of Eric. Are you going to show me this tattoo?"

"Hmm. Wait until we go to bed. I'll show you then."

Jensen managed a quick agreement before Jared's mouth was on his again. They pulled apart almost guiltily when, an hour later, Jensen's mom and sister returned home. Jensen sat up, half-on Jared's lap, and grabbed a beer from the six-pack on the floor. He looked around as his mom came in, closely followed by a slightly happier looking Kenzie.

"Hey, dork. How was the movie?"

Kenzie smiled at the teasing and Jared moved over so that she could sit between them both to tell them just how the movie was. Donna left them to it and headed for the kitchen, telling them all loudly that she was going to fix up some supper and if anyone didn't want any then they should say.

 

 

 

 

 

A few hours later, after Kenzie had fallen asleep and been carried to her room by Jensen, the rest of them decided it was time for bed. Donna said good night and went on ahead, and Jensen led Jared to a door off the opposite side of the lounge. His bedroom was at the front of the apartment, well away from the others, and he was glad for that tonight. Jared undressed the moment the door was shut behind them, and Jensen quickly followed. He turned Jared around before he could kiss him, touching the still-new tattoo that now covered where the crow had been. Eric was clearly some kind of genius now, because Jensen couldn't even tell which part the crow had been now, amongst the darkly shaded shark that now sat there. It was mostly in shadow, surrounded by green strands of what Jensen supposed was meant to be kelp.

"You like it?"

"Yeah. I like it. At least it won't get you in trouble, huh?"

"Depends what kind of trouble you mean."

"Bed first. Then maybe we can make some trouble between us."

Jared laughed. "Sure."

 

 

 

 

They woke late the following morning, warm and sated and ready for more. Jensen held back a quiet laugh as Jared slid down underneath the covers and then quickly pulled the quilt up to his mouth to cover it when Jared started sucking his dick. He felt Jared's hands on his thighs, holding him down, and relaxed into the touch there even though everywhere else was far from relaxed. He could tell that Jared was jerking himself off at the same time, and he whimpered quietly into the quilt at the thought of it. It was strange, having to be so quiet, and strangely more erotic. Jensen was ready to come in a shorter time than usual, but he forced himself to hold back. He didn't know if that made it worse or better when he finally let go, but he did know that he had to clamp his teeth together so hard that his jaw ached just to keep himself from crying out.

Jared licked him clean and edged his way back up again, his own hand still on his dick, pumping it slowly.

"You want me.." Jensen didn't finish the question, just wrapped his fingers around Jared's and helped him until he too was coming, hips jerking as he covered their hands with his release.

It took them a few minutes to calm down enough to be bothered to move, and they cleaned up when they did. Jared pulled on his clothes from the night before, Jensen found some clean stuff that he was sure had belonged to Jared before anyway, and then they went out into the lounge and found Kenzie playing video games.

"Where's Mom?"

"Out. Chris called, said he'd be here in a half hour. I told him you were too busy with Jared to answer the phone." She smiled her 'I'm-so-innocent' smile at them, then turned back to her game. Jensen rolled his eyes, but said nothing.

"You want some breakfast before he gets here?"

"Love some. What's Chris coming over for?"

"Help me decorate my room. Don't know if you noticed, but the walls are kind of white still."

Jared grinned, eyes going to the back of Kenzie's head to see her reaction as he said, "Didn't notice much of anything, what with all the sex..."

Kenzie dropped her controller and looked round at them, her eyes wide. "You don't have to talk about that stuff in front of me!" She told him.

"Yeah, yeah. I know you want to hear all about it really. Can't tell you, though. Your Mom might kill me. That and we need to have breakfast."

"You _do_ know it's nearly lunchtime, right?"

Jensen ruffled her hair, despite her protests when he did. "We work to different hours than you do. You'll find that out when you grow up."

She wrinkled her nose at him, scowling. "Ha ha. Shut up."

Jensen turned to Jared. "Hey, she sounds like you do."

They left her poking her tongue out at them, as they went into the kitchen to get some food.

Chris arrived right on time, dead on noon, and soon the three of them were in Jensen's room with the paint he had stowed away a few days previous, contemplating the bare walls. Jared started on moving and covering furniture, away from the walls, while Chris prepared a couple of trays of paint and the rollers. Jensen, meanwhile, chose some music to play while they worked and made sure all the little things that had been out were away to avoid any paint spattering on them.

"So, what're we allowed to do here?" Jared asked, as soon as they were ready to paint.

"Well. Mom said anything I wanted. So long as I didn't paint the walls black."

"No black?"

"None. Only because she knows I'm not going to be in this apartment for long once the holidays start."

"Right. Because we're getting our own place." Jared grinned as he said it, and Jensen could see that he was still pleased by the fact that he wanted them to be together for a long time. That he had _planned_ it.

"Exactly. You have any ideas, then?"

"Oh, yeah. I got some ideas. I'll do this wall and you can do the rest."

"That's the biggest wall," Chris pointed out. "You sure?"

"I'm sure. This will be the accent wall."

"Accent wall?" Jensen echoed.

"Yeah. I read about it somewhere. Yes, Jensen, I'm still reading."

"Didn't say a word. And okay. You can do the accent wall. Enjoy."

 

 

 

 

"Holy sh-"

" _Kenzie._ "

"I'm sorry, but.. Why couldn't you let Jared do _my_ room?"

"Because if you had anything like this on your walls then Mom would probably kill us both."

Chris had to agree with that, but he was still impressed. Three of the four walls of Jensen's room were a pale, warm orange colour. The fourth had been left white, but Jared had painted a tattoo design on it in blue, red and green. The bright colours made each edge look sharp. The effect was somewhat fantastic. Jensen wasn't entirely sure yet that his Mom would agree, but he loved it and Chris assured him that she would be fine with it once she knew that.

"So how come you all got more paint on each other than on the walls?"

"Are you going to stop asking dumb questions and go call Mom? Find out where she is?"

Kenzie gave an exasperated sigh, but left them alone.

"Do you want me to go?" Chris asked, as Jared slid his arms around Jensen as he stayed where he was, admiring the wall.

"Stay for dinner at least. It's fine, man. Jay can control himself."

Chris laughed at the look Jared gave him over Jensen's shoulder, then. "Yeah, I don't think he agrees with you. But I'll stay for dinner, then I gotta get going. Promised Dani I'd take her out tonight. Late showing of some horror movie."

"Rather you than me," Jensen told him. He wasn't particularly bothered about watching horror movies. He would if Jared wanted to, but would probably be likely to spend the whole time trying to distract his boyfriend away from it.

"It'll be good, I'm sure. And if it's not, sure we can entertain ourselves."

 

 

 

 

 

Jared intended to go home after dinner, let Jensen have some time with his family, but he got so comfortable with Jensen on the couch when they were done eating, that he couldn't be bothered to move. Donna didn't ask him to, and neither did Jensen, and that made his mind up for him. He didn't leave until midday the following day, with quiet kisses and promises on the stairwell and a need to see Jensen once more as soon as he was out of the door. As soon as he was gone, Jensen hit the books again, knowing that he needed to make every hour that he could count. At least until the weekend, when he would see Jared again.


	51. Chapter forty-nine

The knock at the door was almost overlooked, what with all the bedlam in the relatively small house on the bad side of town. The man calling upon the Morgan household looked around, a little wide-eyed, at the motorcycle brigade that was clogging the driveway. Cars lined the street, down into the cul-de-sac. He'd had to park a good ways away, and walk to the address. He could hear voices coming from inside the house, from the garage, and from the back yard. It was a brouhaha.

Reaching up again, he rapped his knuckles upon the door only a few times before it was ripped open. A very tall, very _tattooed_ man stood on the other side, his head covered with a skull cap.

"Hey," the tattooed man greeted.

"Hi," the kid answered, a little frightened at first. He held up a covered pizza box. "You order a pizza?"

Jared smiled. "Fuck yeah," he nodded, digging into his pocket. He quickly checked the bills and made sure he had enough to cover a tip, and then snagged the pizza box from the teen. He didn't say good-bye or even thank you. He simply closed the door and flipped open the top of the box.

"Is that _pizza_?"

Jared looked up from the box and smiled at Jensen, snagging a slice. It was still hot, but that didn't deter him. "Yeah?" He bit into it, making a happy grunting noise.

"Jared," Jensen almost scolded. "We're eating at the reception." He moved closer, carrying a vase of flowers that Stevie had arranged the night before.

"Which is like four fucking hours away," he reminded him.

"You still shouldn't eat that right now."

"Don't start that crap," he warned, serious. "It's your fault I'm eating it in the first place."

He was stunned. "Mine?" Jensen returned.

"Yes, yours," Jared nodded. "You're the one making me quit smoking again."

Jensen only rolled his eyes at him, moving to set the vase of flowers on the end table by the window. As Jensen passed by him, Jared leaned in and planted a greasy kiss on the young man's face. "Ugh," Jensen complained, wiping off his cheek. "Gross."

"Gross, my ass," Jared laughed around a mouthful of pizza. He sat down upon the sofa, which Jensen had just cleaned off, and propped his booted feet up on the newly Windexed coffee table. "Only one thing better than a sausage-and-mushroom-pizza kiss." He wriggled his eyebrows at Jensen when their gazes met.

Jensen had to smile and laugh at him. "Shut up, you weirdo."

With the pizza box on his lap, and a half-eaten slice in his hand, Jared motioned to Jensen. "So. What's with the gay shirt?"

Jensen looked down at his chest. He'd known full-well that he shouldn't have worn the pink shirt that Kenzie had gotten him for his birthday. He tried not to sigh too loudly though. "It's not a gay shirt," he said.

"Yeah," Jared nodded with a greasy grin, "it is."

Jensen wondered how, even though Jared was still noshing on pizza and being crass, he could still find him attractive. _Horribly_ so. If it weren't for the festivities coming up, he'd probably be all over Jared in a heartbeat, and slick with sausage and mushroom kisses. "It's _pink_ ," Jensen told him. " _Real_ men wear pink."

Jared laughed through a mouthful of cheese and sauce. "No," he corrected. " _You_ wear pink because you're gay. Other men wear pink because they've fucked up the laundry."

Narrowing his eyes, Jensen tried to be mad at him. It didn't work. Sure, he was annoyed, but that would quickly pass. "Shut up," he said again, heading out of the room.

"Don't wear the gay shirt to the wedding!" Jared called after him.

"Shut _up_!"

 

 

 

 

He had, of course, expected to hear the slew of women talking all through the upstairs. While very little of Stevie's family had been able to show up, she had plenty of close friends. And some of Jeffrey's biker buddies' wives had wedged themselves into the upstairs bedroom. The noise was almost deafening as they all cackled aloud.

Having shed the pink shirt in favor of a smart white one, Jensen adjusted his tie as he stepped up the carpeted stairwell. Shelby bounded up the stairs ahead of him, tongue lolling as she went. Jensen's digital camera was slung around his neck; he planned on capturing every second that he could. He arched his eyebrows at the women's laughter, smiled at the catcalls. They weren't for him, however. They were for Stevie and something she was holding; a gift from someone in the room. One of the women spotted Jensen, and they all quickly quieted down. Stevie closed up the box that was in her hands and passed it off. She turned around and looked at Jensen, stifling a smile.

"Look at you, gorgeous camera man," she grinned.

Jensen was pretty sure he didn't want to know what they had been cackling over. He blushed slightly at her compliment and looked her up and down. "Look at _you_ ," he returned. "You're beautiful."

She giggled and shrugged her shoulders at him. "Thank you." The strapless gown trailed down to the floor, just barely touching the carpet. With heels, it would be the perfect length for walking down the steps and out into the yard, where Jeffrey and the Justice of the Peace would soon be waiting. She wore a feather necklace that reminded Jensen of a miniature boa. It was black, standing such a contrast against her skin and the stark white of the plain dress. He thought maybe, for a moment, he saw exactly why Jeffrey had fallen in love with her and her uniqueness.

"Jensen, you look wonderful!"

He turned, just in time to lean down to get a hug and kiss from his mother, being mindful of the camera she had given him for Christmas. "Mom," he greeted, surprised. Kenzie wasn't far behind, dressed in her favorite green dress. "I thought you guys were going to stay in today."

Donna smiled happily. "Stevie wouldn't let me wallow," she winked. "She made me her maid of honour last night at the bachelorette party."

"There was a bachelorette party?" Jensen tried to pretend that there hadn't been any sort of bachelor party for Jeffrey, but there had been. After all, a very _long_ stint of bachelorhood was coming to an end.

Donna giggled and nodded. "This is so exciting," she said happily. "I've never been a maid of honour before. And Kenzie is the ring bearer."

Jensen chuckled at her. "Well, good," he nodded. "I was hoping you guys would come today."

The crowd of women started to mumble again. Jensen looked up to see Dani moving through the crowd. With her, she carried two bouquets of flowers, one smaller than the other, both bound with black velvet. She handed the bigger one to Stevie, smiling brightly at her. "Finishing touches done," Dani declared. She gave the smaller bouquet to Donna, who was dressed in a simple black-and-blue dress.

"Perfect," Stevie said to her, giving her a quick hug and kiss on the cheek.

A woman Jensen had never met before stepped closer. She handed Stevie a simple netting hat that reminded Jensen of something from the 40's. The netting came down partway over Stevie's forehead. She looked very elegant and smiled at Jensen as the veil was adjusted by the other woman.

He nodded at her, a half-smile on his face. She was, indeed, perfect. He only tore his eyes away from her when he heard the telephone ring. One handset was beside the bed. Jensen moved to answer it.

 

 

 

 

 

Jeffrey paced. And paced. As he had been doing for the past few hours.

"Dude," Jared said to him. He wore a simple black T-shirt, new and not-yet-frayed, along with a clean pair of black jeans. His biker boots were heavy on his feet, but present as always. He had on two wrist cuffs, masked by a black leather jacket. Jeffrey hadn't asked him to dress up, knew it was pointless. Jared looked nice, and that's all that mattered, even if he was channelling Johnny Cash at the moment.

"What the hell's wrong with Cash?" Jared had asked when Jeffrey had said as such to him.

"Nothing," he'd said back. "No, I was just saying."

"I can very easily show up in my paint-splattered shirt and oil-stained jeans."

Jeffrey had shaken his head, satisfied with the current choice in wardrobe. "The black's fine."

"I thought so."

And then the pacing had started. Cane in hand, Jeffrey walked back and forth, back and forth, shoes scuffling along the cement floor as he moved.

"I swear to God, man," Jared complained. "You're going to wear a path in my floor."

Jeffrey wanted to say something about it really being _his_ floor, but his mind was having trouble forming any kind of coherent sentence. He looked at his watch for the millionth time, biting at his bottom lip. He was suddenly aware of the scruff there, and reached up to his face, beard stubble rasping across the pads of his fingers.

"I should have shaved," he mumbled. "I'll go do that now."

Jared reached out and grabbed hold of him, his strong hands at either of Jeffrey's shoulders. "Jeff."

"What?"

Jared buttoned up the open collar of Jeffrey's white dress shirt. "You look _fine_."

"But I should have shaved."

"You did," Jared told him. "You trimmed up the beard this morning."

"Oh," he breathed. "I'm doing the beard-thing?"

Jared nodded. "Yeah."

"Oh."

Jared could easily see that that hadn't made him settle down at all. He took a deep breath and sighed, reminding himself to feel empathy for the man. He glanced over to Chris, who was brushing Jeffrey's suit coat off, making sure Shelby hadn't left a stray dog hair on the fabric. Chris smiled back at Jared, shaking his head just slightly.

"Why are you so nervous?" Jared asked, threading a black tie around Jeffrey's neck.

Jeffrey swiped a hand over his mouth, swallowing against a dry throat. "What if she doesn't show up, Jay?"

Jared made a face at him, rolling his eyes. "She's already said yes, butthead," he said back.

Jeffrey didn't even flinch at the name-calling. He simply nodded his head, looked down at his shoes and tried to remember to breathe. He looked back up at Jared, his eyes wide with fear. "Your Mom," he began suddenly.

The conversation instantly turned awkward. Jared shook his head again, concentrating on tying his adoptive father's tie. "Don't, Jeff," he warned.

Jeffrey reached up and stopped Jared from moving. It was silent as he stared into his boy's eyes, a world of unsaid conversation in his gaze. "Your Mom," he said again. "She was the only other one I ever asked to do this with."

Jared frowned slightly, returning Jeffrey's stare. The man's eyes shone, watery, but Jared couldn't tell for sure if it was from tears or not. "I know," he said softly.

Gripping Jared's hands in his, Jeffrey nodded. "Tell me she'd be happy," he almost whispered, his voice gruff.

Jared had to look away for a moment, his own vision clouding. He swallowed and pursed his lips, willing his emotions to back off. It touched him, however, that Jeffrey still thought of his mother, even after all these years. Even after finding Stevie. Clearing his throat, he nodded and slipped out of Jeffrey's grasp. He knew he didn't need to answer verbally. Jeffrey could tell, not only from the nod, but from the way Jared met his eyes, that he agreed. Mom would have been happy. He looked away, down to the tie he hadn't finished knotting. "We're going to be late," he said.

Reality seemed to slap Jeffrey in the face. Panic welled up in him again. "Oh, Christ," he breathed. "I gotta go talk to her."

"You can't," Jared said.

"Why not?"

"I don't know," he said. "Y-you'll fuck it up."

"What?"

Chris laughed in the background. "He means it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding," he interjected.

"That," Jared nodded.

Jeffrey held out his hand to Jared, fingers wiggling for a moment. "Alright, then give me your phone."

"I'm not giving you my phone."

"Listen, you little jerk--"

"Oh, shut _up_ ," Jared sighed. "You know I'd do anything for y--" But before he could get the tie knotted properly, Jeffrey slipped out of his grasp. Jared felt adept fingers tugging at his front jean pocket, where he always kept his cell phone. He tried to stop Jeffrey, slapped his hand down over the pocket, but the man was too fast for him. "Shit."

Jeffrey was off in a flash, dropping his cane. Chris didn't move to help, instead just watching from his place, a bright smile upon his face. This was better than any reality TV out there. Jeffrey was heading up the ladder, halfway up the rungs before Jared even headed over towards him, at a rather lazy pace, knowing Jeffrey had no real place to go.

"What the hell are you doing?" Jared called out. "Give me my phone back. Jesus Christ, you're fast for a decrepit old man."

Jeffrey grunted as he hauled himself up onto the second level. "I gotta call her, Jay," he said.

"No, you don't," he corrected. "She's _going_ to marry you, Jeff."

"I know," he nodded. "I gotta stop her."

"What?" His voice was raised an octave in surprise. "That's it, I'm coming up there."

Tie only half-knotted, Jeffrey pointed at him. "You stay there!" He knew very well that Jared wouldn't listen, so he hauled the old metal aluminum ladder up to the second level with him.

Jared was stunned at the man's cunning and abilities, considering he was still on a cane with his injured leg. "Dude!"

With the suit coat forgotten about, Chris could do nothing more than stand in his place and laugh. Jeffrey was dialing the phone, pressing it to his ear. "Jensen!" he almost yelled. "Put Stevie on."

"Alright, that's it," Jared said, shedding his leather jacket. "No more Mister Nice-guy."

Still entertained, Chris watched as Jared climbed up onto the sofa, boots and all, and jumped with all his might. The first time, his fingers only scraped the edge of the landing. On the second try, he was able to get better purchase on the beam.

"Stevie," Jeff said, a note of relief in his voice. He smiled and held the phone closer. "What the hell are you doing?"

With impressive strength, Jared hauled himself up to the second level, the muscles in his inked arms flexing madly. He growled aloud with the effort; with a ticked-off expression he glared up at Jeffrey.

"Are you sure you want to do this, baby?" Jeffrey spoke into the cell phone. "You can still back out of all of this if you want to." He noticed Jared straightening and nearing him. He held out a hand to him, silently asking for just a few more seconds of conversation. "What? No, of _course_ I want to marry you, baby. But seriously, do you realize what sort of dysfunctional jerks we all are?"

"Give me the phone, Jeff," Jared growled, holding out his hand.

"You're sure?" he asked, eyes glittering with happiness. "I can't talk you out of it?"

"Give me my goddamn phone," he said again, this time managing to twist the cell out of Jeffrey's grasp. Without so much as a word to Stevie, Jared turned the phone off and snapped it closed.

Jeffrey looked rather stunned. "You just hung up on my wife."

Jaw muscles flexing, Jared shook his head. "Not yet, I didn't." He pointed to the lower level.

Immediately, Jeffrey raised his hands. "Alright," he gave in. "But let me shave?"

Jared sighed. "Fine," he agreed. "We'll send Chris up to get your razor, okay?"

Jeffrey smiled happily.

 

  


 

 

Freshly shaven, and in a much better state of mind, Jeffrey waited outside by the Justice of the Peace. He still looked nervous, but the pacing had stopped, replaced now with the tapping of his fingers on his cane. Jared watched him for a moment, standing beside him as Best Man, then smiled and leaned in closer.

"Stop fidgeting," he said.

Jeffrey looked over at him, nodding his head. "Sorry." He tried to calm down, to occupy his mind with something else. But when the crowds, seated on fold-out chairs on the lawn, started to mumble, he looked up.

Stevie was there. Jeffrey felt a simultaneous jolt of relief and one of panic. All these years being single had affected him after all. But he wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of his life with her. The baby she carried within her was an added bonus.

"Told you," Jared said softly, leaning in close to speak into Jeffrey's ear. If he was heard, however, Jeffrey made no indication of it. His attention was all on his bride.

The guests stood to honour Stevie. She walked down the aisle behind Kenzie and Donna, never taking her eyes off of Jeffrey. Constantly, she smiled, incomprehensibly happy about the day. She grinned all through the ceremony, only breaking away from his gaze when she had to slide a black-and-silver band onto Jeffrey's finger. The ring had a tribal-tattoo look to it, and matched Stevie's, albeit a thicker gauge than hers. They were unique, just as Stevie and Jeffrey were in their own.

Jared watched the only father he ever really knew take vows with someone not his mother. He wasn't nearly as sad as he thought he'd be. He, of course, thought of Mom, but he didn't regret anything. This was life, and they were all doing a pretty damn good job with it.

Jensen snapped the occasional picture as the ceremony went on. He had been touched that Jeffrey and Stevie wanted him to capture their special day. He had set up a few shots of Stevie on her own, in her gown, and one or two of Jeffrey getting ready and in his suit and tie, both of which would be shed before too much longer. Jensen could tell that Jeffrey wasn't comfortable in such clothes. Jensen had also gotten a couple great shots of Donna and Kenzie, a few of Chris and Dani. He'd gotten a couple silly ones of Jared, but decided he'd save more creative ideas for _his_ photo shoot. He looked over to Jared repeatedly during the ceremony. On quite a few occasions, he found Jared already watching him. He hoped there were some devious plans being made in that pretty head, because he had some ideas of his own.

Listening to the Justice of the Peace, Jeffrey was immensely glad that Stevie had decided against writing their own vows.

"Not a good idea, babe," he had told her months before the wedding.

"Why not? It's so sweet when couples do that."

"Not unless you want vows like 'because I think you got a hot bod,'" he had admitted. "I ain't so good with words."

She had giggled at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and giving him a slow, soft kiss. "But you _do_ think I have a hot bod, right?"

"Absolutely."

"Until I get all fat and stuff from the baby."

"Are you kidding?" he'd grinned. "You're beautiful and you'll always be that way."

Thankfully, she had quickly gotten rid of the idea of self-made vows. The Justice of the Peace made a quick show of the ceremony, not dawdling over miniscule things. They exchanged rings and Jeffrey heard the most perfect words that had graced his ears to that day.  
  
"May I present to you, Mister and Missus Morgan," the judge said. "Jeffrey, you may kiss your bride."

Jeffrey smiled down at her and pulled her up against the length of his body for a deep, passionate kiss. Jared was the first to whoop happily at them, clapping his hands louder than anyone else. Jensen snapped several pictures of the lip-lock, and one of Jared watching them. Considering how Stevie had been first greeted by him, Jensen was thrilled to see Jared accepting her so easily now.

Once the crowds dispersed, Jensen took a few shots of them on their own, giving everyone time to file out to the front yard where the slew of bikes were parked in the driveway. Jared's was at the head of the mass of metal and tires. When he was done being photographed for history's sake, Jared made his way to the front of the group. He told the other bikers to get to their places, because the bride and groom were coming along soon. And sure enough, by the time Jeffrey and Stevie emerged from the back yard, everyone was in place.

Stevie had to hike up her dress just slightly in order to get on Jeffrey's old Harley. She was rewarded with a number of catcalls and waved them off, blushing. Neither she or Jeffrey bothered with helmets. The reception was just in the back yard, so their leaving was to just ride around the block, followed by every biker they knew west of the Mississippi.

Settled on the bike, Jeffrey nodded to Jared. Instead of throwing rice, birdseed, or whatever tradition "normal" people had, Jared had decided that all of the bikers attending would give Stevie and Jeffrey a revved-up send-off. Jared started the rumbling applause and cranked it up a notch when he felt Jensen swing onto the bike behind him. The noise was almost deafening, bikes revving for several seconds before they pulled out behind Jeffrey and Stevie, not a helmet in sight. They follwed them on a route around the block, the noise increasing tenfold as they went.

Jensen looked behind them. His smile grew exponentially when he saw that Kenzie was on a bike with Trevor, and Donna was on Rock's flashy contraption. Kenzie was thoroughly enjoying herself, but Donna looked more than a little worried. She clung to Rock, who was about three times her size, and watched the road roll by them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"How do you think it went?"

Jared looked up to Jensen, peering at him through one open eye. "Insane," he answered. "Is everyone gone, finally?"

"Yes," Jensen laughed.

"I hope we hired someone to clean up that shit in the back yard," he said. "Because I ain't doin' it."

It was dark outside, the stars twinkling brightly. The chaos that had been taking over the small house on the bad side of town had now died down and left only two people, one cat and one dog to the mess of the aftermath.

Jensen tried not to roll his eyes at him. He put down two bottles of beer on the coffee table, one for each of them. They were halfway to drunk; Jensen was impressed that Jared had held off as long as he did. He had expected to have to pour Jared into Jeff and Stevie's bed, where they would be staying for the time that the couple were on their honeymoon. "We'll have plenty of time to clean up," he said. "Jeff and Stevie won't be back for almost a whole week."

"And Jeff won't be any help afterwards," Jared mumbled. "He won't be able to _walk_."

"Jared!"

"I mean from his leg!"

Jensen smiled brightly. "Liar." He listened to Jared laugh, found out, as he plopped down on the sofa's edge, barely enough room to sit there with the other man sprawled out on the cushions. "Rock said he'd take Mom home for me. Chris and Dani were keeping Kenzie for the night, since Dani promised some sort of haircut or something for her tomorrow."

Jared trained both eyes on him. "Rock's gonna shag your Mom."

Jensen was suddenly disgusted. He looked at Jared, a horrified expression upon his face. "That's gross," he said. "My mom doesn't _do_ things like that."

"He was hot for her, I'm telling you."

"Seriously," Jensen complained. "Shut up."

Jared laughed, resting one hand upon Jensen's thigh. "So your Mom never had sex?"

"Nope."

"Ever?"

"Nope."

"So, you were, like... Hatched?"

Jensen laughed, resting his elbow against the back of the sofa, and propping his head up on his hand. "No," he said. "But it's just wrong to think about that."

"Rather think about us having sex?"

He arched his eyebrows. "Now _that_ ," he admitted, "is something worth pondering."

Jared chuckled again, his whole body convulsing as he did. "Okay, Poindexter," he teased. "Give me a kiss then, and I'll help you think about it."

Jensen bent forward, pressing his lips against Jared's. "Is Shelby in?" he asked, making sure they had plenty of time to relax.

"Mm-hmm," Jared nodded. He reached up and threaded his fingers through the back of Jensen's hair, holding him close. "With food and water. So shut up and kiss me."

Almost immediately, Jensen felt Jared's hands tugging at the dress shirt he wore, pulling it out from underneath his belt, at the small of his back. The man's warm hands found their way underneath the material, sliding up along his back, and back down again, hands trying to memorize each soft ridge of his spine, each line of muscle. Chills inched across his skin, the kiss deepening. The shirt was now almost completely untucked, Jared's hands now at Jensen's shoulders, encouraging him lower.

Jensen knew Jared's ultimate goal, but he took his time getting there. He pressed wet, nipping kisses to Jared's throat, moved to just behind the man's jaw, where he knew there was a weak spot. He worked that special spot until he heard Jared's breathing coming in ragged gasps, felt his fingers clutching at Jensen's shoulders. He moved up to his ear, suckling for a moment, then slid a little lower.

Jared watched him move down, pushing the hem of the black T-shirt up to expose his belly. Jensen looked up at him, keeping his gaze as he opened his mouth and snaked his tongue along the exposed skin. Jensen tugged at the waist band of the black jeans just enough to let his tongue dip lower, teasing. Jared let go of him, moving instead to pop the button on his jeans.

Jensen smiled, letting Jared pull open the jeans, finding a very serious lack of underwear there. Instead of tugging them lower down, however, Jensen set his mouth against the inside of Jared's wrist, just above the cuff he wore there. He trailed kisses all the way up Jared's arm, pausing at the inside of his elbow before nipping at his bicep and then straightening to kiss him properly. Jared gave into him, feeling Jensen's hand worm its way into his open jeans, fingers curling around him and stroking shallowly. He touched Jensen's face, his fingertips tracing imaginary lines across the man's cheek, along his jawline. He loved the smell of Jensen's skin, the taste of faded alcohol on his tongue. Jensen detected a hint of smoke on Jared's, but decided to save the reprimand for later.

One of Jared's hands left Jensen's face. He set it upon Jensen's hand, where he was being stroked into a strong need. He pressed his palm down, wanting more friction there, and at the same time, wanting to tear Jensen's touch away from him, take his time, make both of their muscles tremble from exertion.

Jensen smiled against their kiss, knowing very well what Jared's words would be, if he could find his voice. "You're gonna make me come," he'd have said. Just perfect. Jensen worked his way back down Jared's midriff, biting carefully through the man's tee, at the still-healing nipple rings. Jared hissed through his teeth, but watched Jensen move lower through heavy-lidded eyes. He lifted his hips when Jensen insisted, nudging the jeans down only until there was just enough room. He couldn't help but gasp when Jensen's mouth came down upon him, taking all of him in at once, moving fast and hard, tongue quick and mouth suckling. He threaded his fingers through Jensen's hair only to hold him there, to feel him moving. Involunarily, his fingers curled into a fist. It didn't hurt, though; didn't stop Jensen from moving, wetting his cock with his hot mouth.

It only took a few minutes, really. Jared closed his eyes, found himself thrusting his hips just slightly, pushing down on the back of Jensen's head. He opened his eyes and looked down at him just before he felt the need to close his eyes again, let his mouth fall open, his spine arch against the sofa. He moaned louder than he had in a long while, with no fear of disturbing Jeffrey and Stevie. He could hear Jensen swallowing, felt the man's tongue licking along his cock, suckling at the head to clean him off.

"Goddamn," Jared finally breathed, his chest heaving. "You have _got_ to stop being so fucking good at that."

Moving back up to kiss Jared, Jensen smiled brightly at him. "Why's that?"

Jared kissed him, his tongue cooler than usual because of all the gasping breaths he'd taken. He liked tasting himself on Jensen's tongue. It fuelled his feelings of possession. "Because I'm not letting you out of our apartment to go to school," he said. "Just gonna be my love slave forever."

Jensen laughed, eyes sparkling as he gazed down at Jared. "I like the sound of that."

 

 

 

 

 

The apartment was eerily quiet without Kenzie there. Donna hadn't realized it, mostly because now that she was working again, the place was occupied by both of them at the same time. She wasn't alone much anymore.

That's why, when the phone rang, it startled Donna, made her jump and set a hand to her heart. Quickly calming, she picked up the phone, pressing the ON button.

"Hello?" she greeted.

"Donna, what is going _on_?"

It was Alan, sounding dramatic as always. Donna closed her eyes for a second and sighed, stepping into the living room, from the bedroom. "What are you talking about, Alan?" she asked.

"I saw Jensen in the newspaper," he said.

"Yes, he got Valedictorian," she agreed. "That's the highest honour. I thought you'd be happy about that."

"That's all well and good, Donna," he went on. "But did you see the picture they used?"

"Yes," she said. "Someone on the yearbook staff took it."

She could almost _see_ his mouth twisting into a grimace. "It is one of _the_ most vile pictures of him I've ever seen. What is all over him?"

Donna sighed. She was so tired of the dramatics. "They're called tattoos, Alan," she said. "And those aren't all of them. Get used to them. You can't very well scrub them off with soap and water."

"Well, it's humiliating," he told her. "Everyone in town has seen the picture by now. What am I supposed to say to them?"

Donna grit her teeth, forcing herself to not hang up the telephone. "You should tell them that you're _damn_ proud of your son, Alan," she replied, her voice sounding much angrier than before. "You should tell them that he's worked hard to get where he is, and you were wrong in so many ways to treat him as you did."

"He looks like an ex-convict," he snapped. "We come from a society that frowns upon looking like some tattooed whore from a biker bar. I'm not paying for medical school when he looks like _that_. He'll be laughed out of the practice!"

"Well, guess what?" she said, just as sharply. "You forced that upon him so much that you pushed him right into it. Only Jensen's better than what you think of him. He's blossomed like you wouldn't believe, being around Jared and Jeffrey and Stevie. They're a positive influence on him. He's a good man. He'll work hard and put _himself_ through school. So don't bother with offering any of your money." She sighed, nearing the bedroom again and peeking inside. She eyed the tattooed skin of the man in her bed, mostly covered by the rumpled sheets. "As a matter of fact, I think maybe you shouldn't bother with any of us anymore."

That declaration silenced Alan for a good while. He swallowed back the lump in his throat and softly sighed. "I'm sorry," he said, knocked down off his high-horse. "I made a mess of everything. I was only trying to keep my family, my _son_ safe from what I thought was Evil. I'm still not wholly convinced that it's not. And I can't save him."

Donna frowned, feeling guilty for snapping at him. "Jensen doesn't _need_ saving, Alan," she said. "He needs a Dad."

Donna was sure he was nodding in the silence between them. "I know," he admitted. "Is there no chance of reconciliation between us, darling?"

She looked back over to her bed, to the sleeping, muscled form that had been laying beside her. "I don't know," she returned. "I really don't know."


	52. Chapter fifty

  
Author's notes: The final chapter!  
_______________________  


* * *

Eric's place was a good place to be after hours. It had been a few long weeks for both Jensen and Jared and they were both glad to be together again. Since the wedding they had barely seen one another as Jensen had been too busy studying and taking his last papers to be able to have Jared over. Jared had kept himself busy with other people's bikes and cars, earning money that he said he was mostly saving for them to move in together. They might have both been busy, but they still found time to miss each other and to miss the sex.

Eric had told them that the whole process might take a few hours, but they were happy to spend the time there because they knew that, as soon as they were done, they were free until Jensen's graduation day, only three days away. They planned to go back to Jensen's place and spend the night there, since Donna and Kenzie were both with Jensen's aunt for the night. It was more than likely on purpose that they were going, as Donna knew her son was desperate to have some alone time with Jared and they wouldn't be able to get that at Jeff's place.

The tattoo that Jensen had chosen had been of two eagles, wings outstretched and talons out, seemingly grappling for dominance. Eric had drawn them out an eagle each, both as one part of a whole, and they would each have the designs tattooed onto their chest. They reminded Jensen of the Harley eagle, and in turn of the freedom that he had found since Jared had turned up in his life. He didn't voice that thought, though, thinking he might save it for when Jared would be less likely to mock him for it. Maybe when they were both coming down from a post-sex high.

Eric started on Jared, his eyes darting to Jensen as soon as the man's shirt was off. "You're going to behave this time, right?" He asked.

"We behaved last time," Jensen argued, laughing when Jared said, "Maybe," at the same time.

"Can't make any promises, that's all I'm saying." Jared's eyes narrowed, wicked, and he reached down and grabbed his crotch. "Soon as I saw him today I got a boner, so... You know, if you have to, you can always leave the room."

Eric just tutted and shook his head. He transferred the design onto Jared's skin, glad that the boy stayed still. He may like to tease, but Eric knew he could behave when he was needed to. Jensen watched closer once he had the needle in his hand; felt his skin grow hot and his stomach tighten with arousal as he watched the tattooing begin. He didn't know if it was because he knew how it felt, or if he was turned on by Jared's vulnerable position, or if it was just the fact that his boyfriend's body was on display and he _loved_ looking at those tan muscles and hard abs, but he was already wishing that this would be over so he could get Jared to his bed and let himself be fucked wide open.

He looked up at Jared's face and found the other man watching him with a dirty smile, like he knew exactly what he was thinking. Or was, perhaps, thinking the very same thing. When Eric went to take a break and smoke a quick joint, they made full use of the opportunity to make out for a few minutes. Jensen had not been without Jared for that long, not really, but he had missed the taste of him and the feel of his tongue and his hands and his... _Everything_. Jared was the one to stop it, pulling away and taking a few quick breaths before telling Jensen that he needed to slow it down.

"We got all night," he murmured, fingers toying with the hair curling around Jensen's ears. "Don't get me all hard and uncomfortable before you get yours done. Eric'll have to drag me off of you otherwise."

Reluctantly, he stepped back and waited for Eric to return.

 

 

 

As soon as they got back to Jensen's place they took their shirts off and let the air get to their reddened skin. On Jared's chest the eagle was dark and had its wings spread across, the tips of them just touching underneath his nipples. On Jensen's chest the eagle was a tawny gold and looked as though it was falling backwards, and its talons were curved around his nipples. It was already late, as Eric hadn't finished until almost ten, but they didn't feel tired. They felt horny, hyped up, and in need of one another. Jensen got two beers from the refrigerator and handed one to Jared, opening the other on the edge of the counter.

"Fuck, I need this," Jared said, letting out a pleasured moan as the alcohol slid down his throat. Jensen couldn't help himself at that noise and he moved over to where Jared stood and eased against him, kissing his exposed throat. Jared lowered the bottle slowly, grinning up at the ceiling when Jensen continued his explorations.

"I've missed you so damn much," Jensen whispered. "But thank you for letting me have that time."

Jared looked down at him then, wrapped one arm around him. "I needed to let you study," he told him. "So I can tell everyone that I'm screwing the sexiest doctor in town."

"Will a wannabe doctor do you for tonight?"

"Hmm, don't know. Will he?"

Jensen smiled against Jared's mouth, parting his lips to let the other man's tongue in. They kissed slow and sure, both glad that the house was so quiet.

"Let's forget the beers," Jared suggested, putting his down on the counter behind him. Jensen did the same and then took Jared's hand to pull him into his bedroom. It was such a difference to his old room at the house, Jared thought. The tattoo wall had been left as it was while the plain walls had been decorated with posters for old movies and rock concerts. Jensen's bed was unmade, there were books stacked on the floor, his desk was a mess of paper and CDs and there were clothes piled on top of his dresser, still waiting to be put into the drawers. It looked like Jared had expected it to. It looked _lived in_. On a large corkboard above his bed, Jensen had pinned a bunch of polaroids that he had taken of Jared, Jeff and Stevie, as well as some of his mom, sister and brother.

They fell down to the messy bed together, in a tangle of limbs and tongue. Jared unfastened his belt quickly and shed his jeans, desperate to get rid of any barriers between them. Jensen did the same.

"Want some music?" He asked, as he threw his jeans to the floor.

"No," Jared told him, pulling Jensen round until he was spread out beneath him. "I just want you."

"That's a real corny line."

"I'm a real corny guy."

"You're an _incredible_ guy," Jensen said, not feeling embarrassed at all by voicing the thought. "I don't think I say it often enough, but you really are. And gorgeous." As he spoke the words, he felt an inexplicable rush of sadness and he put his hand to Jared's face, bringing him down for a soft kiss. Jared must have sensed it anyway and asked him what was the matter as he lifted his head again. "I don't know. I just... I nearly lost you, that's all. I nearly lost you because of my own father, and then because of our pig-headedness. And I don't ever want that to happen again."

"It won't," Jared assured him. The promise made Jensen feel slightly better, though he was still unsettled by the stupid thoughts in his head. "It _won't_ ," Jared repeated. "I don't want it to happen again and so I'm not going to let it. I love you more than anyone. And that doesn't scare me any more. Why do you think I'm making plans for our future? Why do you think I imagine us still together when you're done with med school? I'm not letting you go again, Jensen. You're too good to let go."

Jensen looked away, but nodded, relieved. "Me either," was all he could manage to say before Jared was at his mouth again. The kiss was drawn out, deep with emotion and raw need, and Jared's hands were on him, mimicking the strokes of his tongue over Jensen's skin. Jensen tried to move, to reciprocate, but Jared pushed him back down.

"All for you," he told him, his voice low, and wrapped one hand around Jensen's dick to give it a couple of loose strokes. "Just for you."

Jensen didn't know why he deserved it, but with Jared's fingers lightly brushing along his half-hard cock he wasn't going to argue. Jared had him fold his arms behind his head and he did so, leaving his body open and vulnerable. He shivered at the steady but light rhythm on his cock, and at the slow drag of Jared's tongue down the curve of his throat. Jared kissed the skin, his teeth nipping, hard enough to leave a mark. Jensen squirmed at that, then more when his pierced nipple became the next target. Jared lapped over it afterwards, soothing the twinge of hurt. He left the new tattoo well alone, letting go a muffled laugh at the short cry and jerky movement of Jensen's hips when he wrapped his mouth around the entire length of the other man's cock. He felt him start to move his hands and slapped his own hand down to Jensen's side to stop him. He took the hint.

Gripping Jensen's hips, Jared lifted his head slightly and pulled Jensen up to follow. He didn't let him go, his fingers curling round into the crease of Jensen's ass while his tongue moved in a brutal motion, until Jensen was shaking under his hands. Until he was starting to come completely undone. Jensen's hands were gripping the pillow beneath his head so tight that his knuckles were pale. Jared didn't want him to hold back, though. He didn't want him to worry about how long this took, or how quickly he lost it. It had been long enough that those things didn't matter. He pushed Jensen down to the mattress, releasing his cock, and then rubbed his thumb gently over the wet and sensitized crown. Jensen's eyes were squeezed shut and he dragged in a quick, choked breath at the touch, still trying hard to.. Just.. _Not_..

"Jen." Jared said his name as he touched him again, and it seemed that was all he had needed. Jensen swore loudly and came, dick spurting over Jared's hand and his own belly. He opened his eyes when it started and Jared held his gaze as he worked him through it. His own dick was painfully hard now, but he could wait another minute. "All right?" He asked, once that minute was up.

Jensen nodded, breathing too hard to speak. He didn't need to speak, though, as he pushed Jared off him and turned over on the bed, lifting himself up in an invitation for Jared to fuck him. Jared did not need to be asked twice.

 

 

 

They'd spent most of the night awake, soaking the sheets in sweat and come, and they woke up too early the following morning. It didn't matter to either one of them, though, because they were soon pressed together in the shower, desperate hands sliding over drenched skin, mouths fused together. When they were clean, dried, and dressed, Jared started making them both some breakfast while Jensen shoved his bedclothes into the washer and turned it on. The phone rang as they sat on the couch to watch crappy morning TV and drink their coffee. Jensen let the machine get it. It was his mom, telling him that when the pair of them woke up they would find her and Kenzie over at Jeff's and she'd like them to come over so they could all have dinner together.

"You want to go once we've finished these?" Jensen asked, leaning closer into Jared's side and breathing in the soapy smell of his neck.

"Yeah.. Maybe just.." He turned his head and caught Jensen's mouth in a slow, sensual kiss. "After."

"After," Jensen agreed, reaching to put his coffee mug on the table.

 

 

 

It could have been a party, with as many people as there were there. Or at least, sounded like. As it turned out, when Jared and Jensen stepped inside the house, there was only Jeffrey, Stevie, Rock, Donna and Kenzie. Rock's two dogs, Julius and Mace, paused in their romping with Shelby to eye who had intruded on their playtime. Kenzie looked up too, from her Gameboy, and waved at Jared and Jensen.

"Hey," Jensen greeted her. He stepped closer to his mother, eyeing Rock suspiciously, and leaned down to kiss her cheek. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Well, it _seems_ ," Donna grinned, "that someone in the family is graduating. We were making plans for the party that will be held afterwards."

"You get to be the belle of the ball, honey," Jared teased, patting him on the backside.

Jensen smiled, chuckling softly. "Yay, me," he returned. As he spoke, he moved over to the refrigerator. He snagged a bottle of water for himself, waggling it at Jared, asking if he wanted one. Jared shook his head, concentrating on the conversation that was happening in the house.

"We were thinking about a band," Stevie said.

Jensen cracked open the water bottle and took a swig. His gaze fell to his mother's knee, where Rock's hand rested gently. A lover's touch. He was reminded of Jared's declaration.

_"Rock's gonna shag your Mom."_

_"That's gross. My mom doesn't _do_ things like that."_

_"He was hot for her, I'm telling you."_

_"Seriously. Shut up."_

It seems that it didn't matter if Jared had shut up or not -- he'd been right. Pretending he hadn't noticed the small show of affection, Jensen turned back to the conversation. Jeffrey had mentioned exotic dancers instead of a band, and Jensen had looked up in enough time to see a wink directed at Rock. The man only laughed in return.

"Or hookers," Jared said, leaning against the kitchen counter.

"Thank you," Jensen nodded to them. "I've been voted the freakiest kid in school as it is. That'll be the clincher."

Jared chuckled, draping his arm over Jensen's shoulder. "You're just cranky because you have to make a speech, Mister Valedictorian."

Jensen tried not to roll his eyes, thoughts of himself speaking up on the podium enough to make his knees shake. "Don't remind me."

"What are you going to say in your speech?" Donna asked, looking at her son. "Something inspirational, I hope."

Jensen shrugged. "I'm going to stand up there," he began, "be proud, and announce to the whole world that I'm not a virgin anymore."

Stevie and Donna gasped, glancing at each other, mouths agape. Jeffrey, Rock, and Jared only laughed.

"Jensen Ross Ackles," Donna reprimanded, though with a smile. "You'd _better_ not."

"Everybody already knows anyway," Jared grinned. "They saw how gingerly you walked into class every now and then."

Donna held up her hands. "This is a little too much for me," she announced. "I think I'll head to the store and get the things you wanted for the cookout, Stevie. Anyone want to go with me?"

Rock shrugged. "I'll go."

Before he could even finish his sentence, Jensen pushed away from Jared and headed towards his mother, speaking right on the tail of Rock's words. " _I'll_ go," he offered. Before Donna could make a choice, he put his arm around her and led her to the front door.

"Uh-oh," Jeffrey said after they'd gone. "Looks to me like you got some explainin' to do, son."

Rock frowned, but nodded his head.

 

 

 

 

The grocery store was nearly dead. It felt odd that, on a summer-like afternoon, the place would be so empty, but Jensen was glad. He felt more at ease talking to his mother.

"Anything you want to tell me about, Mom?"

Preoccupied, she gazed over the selection of steaks. Jeffrey had told her what to look for, what he preferred and what made a brilliant grilled steak, and she would do her damndest to get the right thing. "What's that, sweetheart?"

"Talk, Mom," he said. "Anything you want to talk about?"

"Like what?"

Jensen shrugged, hands resting on the handle to the shopping cart. "Oh, I don't know," he said. "Maybe like Rock's hand on your knee?"

She'd known she would have to address it eventually. She'd been hoping for a much more private, quiet place and time however. "Well, what do you want me to say, sweetie?"

"I want you to stop talking to me like I'm nine," he returned. He wasn't so sure why he was so angry about the whole thing. He didn't _care_.

"I'm not, Jensen," she said. "But I'd like to know what you expect."

"I expect an explanation."

"But I don't owe you one," she said with a smile. "I'm sorry, sweetheart, but I don't. I'm a grown woman."

He shook his head at her, eyes narrowing slightly. "But _I_ always owe _you_ an explanation."

"You're my _son_ ," she replied.

"You're my _mother_."

She smiled amidst the momentary silence in the argument. "While I'm not going to disagree, I'm also not going to tell you everything that happens in my life. You don't tell _me_ everything, do you?" She saw him want to argue that point, and shook her head. "If you had, I would have found out about how you felt about... Boys... About _Jared_ , a long time ago."

She had a point. Damn it. Jensen sighed, one corner of his mouth turning down in a frown.

"Jensen, Tommy is a very good man."

He was momentarily stunned. " _Tommy_?" Rock was a real person?

She laughed softly, her eyes sparkling. "Well, you didn't think he was born with the name Rock, did you?"

"I never thought of him as born," he answered honestly. "You know _why_ he's called Rock, right?"

She nodded. "Yes, I do," she said. "I didn't just jump into bed with him the second I met him, you know."

Jensen knew she was right about that too. It was Mom that had given him his morals regarding sex. He hadn't jumped right into bed with Jared either, no matter how much he had wanted to. He watched her turn back to the selection of steaks, finally picking up a package to eye it skeptically. "Alright, so..." He thought for a moment and then shrugged his shoulders. "What about Alan?"

She met his eyes, scowling slightly. "Jensen, I _do_ wish you wouldn't call your father that."

"Fine," he said. "What about _Dad_?"

"Well, what about him?"

"What if he finds out?"

She nodded her head, putting the package of steaks into the cart and grabbing three more amidst careful inspection. "I would hope that when he does, he'll figure out that I'm serious about this whole thing."

"Did you leave him because of me?"

The question was one that must have been worrying him for some time. It was blurted out, said with a strained voice, worried and ashamed. Donna looked at her son and shook her head at him, wondering how he could figure such a thing. "No, Jensen," she said. "I left your father because I should have a long time ago. Everything that happened... That just reinforced it. Don't you _ever_ think that it's your fault. Do you understand me?"

He suppressed a sigh, looking down at his hands and the shopping cart for a moment. "Yes, ma'am," he returned softly.

Donna reached out and touched her son's face, smiling at him when he met her eyes. "Alright," she grinned. "Let's go get the rest of things on the list. Okay?"

She started to move off, but Jensen stayed where he was. "Mom?" he called. He watched her turn towards him, looking happy and much younger than he remembered, her sundress a soft shade of yellow. "Do you love him?"

She had to think for a moment, remembering some of the things she and Rock had said to each other, done to each other, and then shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know," she answered honestly. "I think so."

It wasn't the answer he'd been expecting. He thought for sure, considering what she had taught him, that she would give him a resounding, "With all my heart!" As she turned back around and started down another aisle, Jensen decided that this fell under the old adage of wanting to give your child more than you ever had. Somehow, it fit.

Sighing, Jensen pushed the cart, following his mother down another aisle of the nearly-deserted grocery store.

 

 

 

Laying in bed, Jensen held the papers up to his face, fresh off the printer. He sighed, wriggling under the covers. He was still for only a moment more before he felt the need to move again, uncomfortable. He tried to read what was printed in black and white in front of him, but nothing was getting through. He'd not mentioned Rock to his mother again, and vice versa. Donna hadn't been any more forthcoming about the relationship, either. Jared, who apparently wasn't the only one that could see something was bothering him, finally took him aside and told him to knock it off.

" _What_?" Jensen had asked, almost wounded.

"You're acting like a spoiled rotten rich boy."

Hurt again, he'd looked up at Jared. "What?"

"So your Mom's fucking Rock," he had shrugged. "Better than that asshole that's your real father. Trust me. Rock's a hell of a lot more personable than Alan fucking Ackles."

With that, Jared had smacked Jensen's backside in reprimand -- _hard_ \-- and then walked away. Jensen knew he was right. And he hadn't really cared so much about his mother and Rock together. He wasn't sure what was making him feel so left out. So _jealous_.

After Jared's rather harsh reprimand, Jensen returned to the party and settled down. He zoned out of the conversation for a while, thinking about Jared. About Stevie. About Jared _and_ Stevie. He supposed he could relate to how the man had felt. He didn't make too much of a fuss after that, and even got in on the laughing and story-telling. He knew he was doing right when he looked over at Jared and saw the man's smile, punctuated with an approving nod.

That still didn't help him concentrate on what he was supposed to be doing. He could count in hours how long it was until graduation day. And each time he did, he felt his stomach flip, butterflies making everything in it churn and threaten to break free.

Sighing again, Jensen put down the papers, resting them on his chest. "Ugh," he grumbled. "I give up."

From his place at the computer, Jared looked over at him. "What's wrong?"

"I'm incredibly ignorant, that's what's wrong," he told him.

Laughing, Jared shook his head, pushing away from the computer. "No, you're not," he corrected, stepping towards the bed. He crawled down atop it, moved on all fours towards Jensen. "What's wrong?" he asked again.

Jensen sighed once more. "I can't do this speech," he said. "I can't stand up there, at graduation, and say this crap. They'll think I got Valedictorian because I fucked the principal."

Jared's eyes flew open wider. " _Did_ you?" he asked. "That cad."

He wanted to smile, he really did. But annoyance won over. "You're not _helping_ ," he nearly snapped. "I can't say this crap."

Jared picked up the papers, looking down at them. "What's wrong with it?" he asked. "You _wrote_ it."

"Which is why I can't repeat it to the rest of the world. It sucks."

Setting the papers back down on Jensen's chest, Jared shook his head again, seemingly disappointed in him. "You just don't _want_ to," he corrected.

"Yeah, well," Jensen huffed. "That, too."

Hand sliding over Jensen's chest, underneath the discarded speech, Jared grinned. He watched Jensen squirm slightly uncomfortably at the raw skin-on-skin feel upon the newish tattoo. The look of annoyance faded somewhat as Jared found the bar peirced through Jensen's nipple.

"You're in a bad mood," Jared noted, sneaking in closer to plant wet, suckling kisses to Jensen's neck. "I know what will make you feel better."

Regardless of how Jared's fingers were working over his pierced nipple in slow, steady circles, Jensen's brow furrowed and he tried to move away from him. "I don't feel like it," he sulked.

Jared only smiled against Jensen's throat. He inched lower, his kisses becoming sharper with teeth added in again, tongue lapping away any pain caused. He was careful not to disturb the tattoo too much, not wanting to mar the unhealed flesh and ruin the ink. Instead, he crawled atop Jensen, straddled him and made his way to Jensen's pierced nipple, circling it once with his tongue, then twice for good measure, and a third time when he felt Jensen arch up to him just slightly. Closing his mouth around the nipple, he worked the bar with his tongue, suckling just enough to give a slight tug. Jensen didn't need or like as much pain as Jared did, but he didn't turn much of it away at the same time.

The speech was now resting at his throat, half-hiding Jared's head. Jensen reached for it, papers crumpling in his hand as he tossed them to the floor. Once the pages were gone, he reached for Jared, lacing his fingers through the unruly waves atop the man's head. He was careful at first, only nudging Jared's head. But when the man didn't move, Jensen became rougher, more insistent. He didn't _want_ to be distracted. He wanted to sulk and get over it. Jared had other ideas, it seemed. Roughly, Jensen pulled Jared up to look at him.

In his eyes, Jared didn't have the look of a man who was trying to get away with something devious just to show Jensen up. Instead, he looked like a man under the influence of sex, his eyes darker than usual, pupils dilated. His mouth was open, lips slightly swollen and wet from lavishing attention on Jensen's skin. The look made Jensen's heart beat faster, and he had to take back the words that had almost spilled forward. He shook his head at Jared, glancing down to that perfect mouth. "I hate it when you do crap like this," he said, slightly breathless.

Jared slowly smiled at him, hovering, one hand planted at either side of Jensen's body. He didn't say anything in return, instead leaning in to roughly cover Jensen's mouth with his own, delving his tongue deep.

Kissed like that, with so much need and want, Jensen had no choice but to let his negativity fade away. He shivered underneath Jared, swore he almost melted into the sheets, which was something he always mocked in those ridiculous romance novels his mother used to read. Since meeting Jared, he understood. No one could be kissed that way and not react.

Jensen figured he must have been holding on too tightly when Jared took his hands from his hair, the longish strands pulling painfully as Jensen's fingers untangled. Jared said nothing about the pain, however, but when Jensen's hands were free, he interlocked their fingers and curled Jensen's arms up over his head. Forcefully pinning him there. Demanding. Such possessiveness made Jensen shiver again, chills sparking everywhere in his nerves. Every inch of Jared's body, all taut muscle and warm skin, was touching Jensen's. Even through their flimsy clothes, Jensen could feel the heat coming off of Jared's body in waves. He arched up against him, wanting, _needing_ more. The eagles they each bore grappled for dominance on heaving chests, already slick with a thin film of sweat.

Almost too quickly for Jensen to adjust, Jared was gone, his mouth leaving a hot, burning trail down the line of Jensen's midriff, wasting no time. Jensen's thin pajama pants were suddenly gone. He wanted to be confused, wondering how Jared had slipped them off without him knowing. But he also knew Jared. The man had ways he couldn't begin to comprehend. Jensen's jaw went slack, his eyes drifting closed instead, as Jared took him into his mouth, moving fast and deep, already knowing the kind of need he'd coaxed Jensen into. To try and keep himself in check -- which was almost futile when it came to making love to Jared -- Jensen clutched at the pillow behind his head, fingers clawing and threatening to tear the linen. Legs spread wide, Jensen looked down to find his knees crooked, his hips flexing to Jared's movements. He watched himself let go of the pillow, reach down and take hold of Jared's head, his hands keeping the man steady as he pumped in and out of that hot mouth. Shuddering, Jensen forced himself to pull Jared away.

Dragging his mouth back up Jensen's body, Jared kissed him again. As he did, he blindly reached for the condoms and lube. He felt another hand searching with him, Jensen's long, inked arm brushing up against his. Opening his eyes, Jared found Jensen already looking at him.

"Please," Jensen said amidst the kiss, his lips brushing up against Jared's. "I need to."

It wasn't often that Jensen asked for such a thing. And Jared certainly wasn't adverse to it. Swallowing against a dry throat, he nodded and helped Jensen with the condom and lube. He slipped out of his own shorts, tossing them to the floor. When everything was taken care of, Jared rolled onto his belly, angled across the bed, propped up on his elbows.

Kneeling on the mattress, Jensen watched Jared open his legs and invite him closer. His heart hammered in his chest each time he saw this. It wasn't often that Jensen took Jared, not because he didn't want to. In all honesty, it just rarely worked out that way. Jared had always been a leader, and until Jensen had been exposed to him, he'd been more of a follower. Now, however, he was thankful -- so damn _thankful_ \-- that Jared had taught him how to take the reins when he wanted to.

Slow. Easy. That's what his plan had been. But when his nerves, already raw and screaming for more, felt that first beautiful push into total slick heat, Jensen couldn't stop himself. Hovering over Jared, he pressed moaning, wanton kisses to the man's inked back. He thrust hard, one hand clamped to Jared's hips, voice vibrating against his spine.

Reaching back with one hand, Jared encouraged Jensen to thrust harder, more, _faster, goddamnit_ until both of them were crying out, shuddering violently against each other, muscles straining with release.

Jared quieted before Jensen did, the latter moving his hips shallowly only a few more times before giving one last shudder and then collapsing. He was only vaguely aware of Jared moving, squirming out from underneath him. He felt skilled fingers slip the condom off of him, heard it drop into the trash bin beside the bed. But his eyes wouldn't open. His heart pounded in his chest, blood rushing in his ears. He could feel his pulse throbbing in his stomach, lower.

A soft kiss seemed to rouse him from his drugged state. The sounds their lips made against each others was wet, comfortable. Jensen moaned and forced his eyes open. Jared was hovering over him -- when had he rolled onto his back? He couldn't remember.

"Feel better?"

Jensen smiled. That stupid, giddy, I'm-so-fucking-high smile, his eyelids drooping. "Yes, you bastard," he said. "I hate you."

Jared laughed, just as loud and boisterously as usual. He flopped down on his own side of the bed and sighed. Love and hate were interchangable at this moment in time, he knew. And he adored that it was _him_ that brought that out in Jensen. "Backatchya," he agreed.

 

 

 

Chris had shown up at Jensen's place while he was getting ready, which was a surprise. Jensen had expected him to be at home, being fussed over by his own parents and stressing about the day to come. But he hadn't looked even remotely worried, and told Jensen that he had a gift for him. An early congratulations on what Chris was sure would be a great speech.

"Chris, don't. You've not even heard it yet. Believe me, it's not great."

"Shut up. It will be. Here." He handed Jensen a small blue box and Jensen's brow furrowed in confusion as he opened the lid. Inside was a St. Christopher medal on a fine silver chain and he found himself having to swallow past a lump in his throat as he lifted it out. He knew it was down to tiredness that he was feeling so emotional, but he curled the chain around his fingers and then threw his arms around Chris, hugging him tightly in gratitude. "I know you've got a hell of a journey ahead of you," Chris said, when he let him go. "And I hope that helps to keep you safe for every moment of it."

"Jensen!" Now his mother was calling him and he quickly finished fastening his tie and pulled on his suit jacket. There was about an hour to go before he would be sat out in the sunshine, awaiting the time where he had to be up on the podium. An hour to go and he had to leave any minute and still there was no sign of Jared. Jeffrey had warned him that Jared had planned to be busy in the morning, but that he'd promised he'd make it to the ceremony. It felt like that very first time he had wanted Jared to be there for him, back at the swim meet. He'd made it then, but today felt different.

"Should I call him?" Jensen asked, as he went out into the kitchen where the rest of his family were sat.

"Honey, it'll be all right. He'll be there. You know he wouldn't miss it."

Jensen shook his head. "I don't know. He said last night that he didn't want to make me more nervous about this by being there. What if Dad shows up?"

"Then he'll see how well you've done." Josh stepped up to his younger brother and took hold of his shoulders, steadying him. "Jensen. Stop panicking. You'll be fine."

"Easy for you to say. You don't ever have to do this again."

"No, that's right. Because I've already done it, so believe me when I say I know what I'm talking about. You will be _fine_."

Jensen nodded, sighing.

 

 

 

It was the perfect day for it and within half an hour, Jensen felt like he was utterly drenched in sweat. He wanted to rip off the stupid gown and go find a pool to skinny-dip in, but he knew he couldn't. He looked back at where his mom and Rock were sat together, with Kenzie, Josh and Cathy on one side, and Jeffrey and Stevie on the other. Jensen felt pleased and proud that so many of the people closest to him had shown up to hear his speech, but he still wished that the one person who was missing would just show up already. He wanted Jared there. He didn't know if he would feel able to do his speech without him.

The ceremony seemed to drag for him, only because he wanted to get it over and done with. His mom hadn't mentioned the graduation party again and he wasn't sure what was going on after he graduated. He assumed that they would go back to Jeff's and get nicely drunk, and then Jared would take him to bed after everyone had gone and give him the best fuck of his life. Or pretty high-ranking, at least. That's what he hoped for, anyway.

When his name was finally called, he made his way to the stage on shaky legs. Looked around and caught sight of his father at the back of all the rows of seats. He stopped when he saw him, and a couple of people looked round to see what he was staring at. Alan nodded at him, then turned and headed away, leaving Jensen at the front of a crowd of impatient people who all wanted his speech to be over with as much as he did. He took his place and looked out at everyone, swallowing back the dry feeling in his throat. He was about to start speaking when he heard it. People were looking round again, but this time for a different reason. The sound of a bike's engine was unmistakable, although Jensen didn't think it was the Suicycle. The thought was confirmed when the Harley came into view, and Jared pulled up between some of the cars parked near the side of where everyone was sat and cut the engine.

The silence was sudden and Jared raised a hand and gave Jensen a quick wave, before heading to the empty seat that had been saved for him next to Jeffrey. Jensen breathed out as he watched Jared tug his helmet off, and then he felt his nerves start to dissipate. Finally, he was ready.

"To my fellow graduates I offer congratulations for your achievement today. This diploma is a culmination of all our hard work as well as a step forward to our future studies.

"With this diploma we find a world opened up to us, chances and possibilities down any path we choose to take. We find a world in which we can use every lesson we have learned, both personal and general. Lessons of responsiblity, acceptance and conscientiousness. Every lesson that we need to see us through the coming academic challenges and everything that we might face in our futures are lessons that we have been taught by this school, and by each other.

"I have learned a lot the past few months, I know that. I have learned to be more confident, less self-deprecating. I have learned that strength doesn't have to be a physical thing and that everyone has their own boundaries of acceptance and their own definition of it. I have been on the receiving end of narrow-mindedness and it has taught me that this is something I don't ever want to be. I hope that none of you ever have to face this, but that if you do you will have the confidence, the will and the determination to overcome it.

"There are so many people to thank for helping us to where we are today. On behalf of everyone here, I would like to thank our professors and sports coaches for making sure that we didn't give up and for being there for advice and encouragement whenever we have needed it. On a personal note I would like to thank my parents for shaping my career and making sure that I would work as hard as I needed to in order to achieve it." Here he stopped, looking down at the podium for a moment. He hadn't wanted to mention his father, but he knew that Alan had played a part and that his role needed acknowledgement. He swallowed, then continued.

"I would like to thank my best friend, Chris Kane, whose support helped me through difficult times. I would like to thank Jeff and Stevie Morgan, for being there for me as much as I needed them to be. And..." He stopped again. Looked up at the rows of faces. "I would like to thank Jay, for teaching me more about myself than I have ever learned from anyone else. For loving me and _knowing_ me.

"Again, to all of you, I offer my praise and admiration for your hard work and your accomplishments that have brought you here. I wish you luck, happiness and good fortune in all your future pursuits. Thank you."

 

 

 

His mom had been crying, of course. His speech had been over for only a couple of minutes, but he could see that her mascara had run a little and that her eyes were still slightly puffy. Jeffrey clapped a hand on his shoulder and told him that his speech had been just fine. Just right.

"Great," he said, his voice shaking. "Does that mean I can go get drunk now?"

"No way," Jared told him, as he came up behind him and wrapped an arm around his waist.

"What do you mean, 'no way'?"

"I mean, no way. We're leavin'."

Jensen's mouth opened, and he looked around at his mom and Jeff, who were both grinning at him. "Where are we going?" He asked, as his mom started digging around in her purse. She handed him an envelope and leaned forward to kiss his cheek.

"We were going to have this great party for you, but then Jared came up with his own idea. So that's all the money we would have spent on the band.. Sorry, the _hookers_ , and a little extra from me and Jeff and Stevie."

"Mom, I don't need this. Kenzie and you-"

" _Jensen_. Take it. It's for you."

Jared moved around him, leaned in to press a soft kiss to his mouth. Distracted, Jensen let him, looking at the money that was now in his hands. "What do we need all this for?" He asked, looking to Jared.

"You and me are going on a trip," came the answer. "The bags are packed and on the bike, so we're ready to go right now."

"Go where?" Jensen asked again. "And how long are we going for?"

"Wherever the road takes us," Jared handed him his helmet and leather jacket. "And for however long it takes."


End file.
